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blushoseoks · 7 years

Text

HANGING BY A MOMENT

His favorite things are the summers, because that's when you return from boarding school, and his life becomes a lot more bright and a lot less dull.

“friendship can be an excuse. a cover for when there’s something there you don’t want to admit or you’re too scared to explore.” - gossip girl

pairing: park jimin x reader words: 8,653 genre: skinny!love, warnings: mature themes, slight angst before: alright, so please keep in mind that this is the first oneshot I have ever written, therefore please don’t be too harsh on me. I hope I get better in time. I received two Jimin requests and decided to combine them both into one. any who, I hope this is somewhat tolerable! I apologize in advance.

Jimin's not sure when it began.

As he watches you dance with a very inebriated yet still somehow skillful Hoseok, who insists on being a little too touchy with you (at least in Jimin's opinion) it's all that seems to cross his mind.

That, and the thought of how badly he wants to remove Hoseok from the current situation and instead replace the older with himself.

You both are dancing to the slower version of one of your favorite songs, one that's permanently etched in Jimin's mind because of your refusal to listen to anything else but the damn song the entire summer break of last year.

“Pilgrims,” by Johnny Lloyd is what's playing from the beaten up stereo Taehyung insists still works, even though the voice comes out stat-icky and very much muffled. And as Johnny repeats the verse of, “It's late, and I know, I'll never love somebody like you.” You and Hoseok point both of your pointer fingers in each others general direction, a wide smile curving upwards at the corners of your lips as a laugh erupts from your throat.

Jimin can't tell if you've had anything to drink or not, because even in your normal state you're always this outgoing, always this charismatic. And he can't quite tell if it's the moonlight causing your skin to glow, or if it's just you in general.

He wouldn't be surprised if it was the latter, though, because in his mind you're just that ethereal.

Hoseok takes your hand in his much larger one, lifts his arm upwards and waits for you to twirl under. Which you do a few times, before Hoseok pulls you into a very close and tight embrace, your back to his front, his chin nuzzled in the crook of your neck.

And little do you know that the small action makes Jimin's heart feel like it's being grabbed and squeezed until it turns into nothing but little tiny pieces.

You're not dressed up, but Jimin still thinks you look beautiful.

You're wearing a tshirt, one too large, the hem ending a few inches before it reaches your kneecaps. Large hoop earrings piercing through one of the sets of holes in your ear, and your black hair is pulled up into an effortless pony tail, your makeup is scarce, and your black boots are long enough to surpass your knees and reach the hem of your shirt.

You, Taehyung, Jimin, Hoseok, and Seokjin are once again at the only place in the entire town that isn't infested with kid's, the only place in town besides boring house parties, and too expensive movies, that is a source of entertainment for the teens who live in Busan.

The rest of your friend group consisting of: Jungkook, Namjoon, and Yoongi, were far too busy to make it to your guy's regular Saturday night tradition that dwelt of: going to the cliffs that were named KINGSLEIGH'S, listening to music, drinking and occasionally smoking pot, depending whether or not Taehyung had come into possession of some weed. And much to Jimin's disappointment he just so happened to not on this particular night. Leaving Jimin with no choice but to drown his sorrows in a bottle of beer, when he'd much rather prefer weed. He disliked alcohol, but hell if he was going to watch Hoseok and you dance sober.

Jimin really isn't sure when it began, the unmistakable feelings he has for you. He would like to classify them as a small crush, but the said feelings had yet to disappear and it had been more than one summer since they developed. Now, that he thinks it through it wouldn't surprise him to find out that he's had the littlest bit of a crush on you since the day his eyes landed on perfection personified in human form going by your name.

He remembers it clearly, seeing you for the first time. It almost took him by surprise when Taehyung had told him that he had a sister, if it wasn't for the pictures of you framed in family photographs, or the yearly ones taken and sent to the family, then he wouldn't have believed it.

“Mom says you can't stay long tonight, since my sister is arriving home today, but you should be good to come back tomorrow or sometime.” Taehyung had stated, and all Jimin had done was nod his head in understanding.

It was seconds after he left the house, when you arrived home for the summer. He had just walked out of the front door, when a car he instantly recognized as Taehyung's father's pulled up in front of the house. The dark red color of the 1989 cadillac surely would have been able to keep his attention, like it did any other time, if it wasn't for the girl that got out of the passenger's side door moments later.

He's pretty sure his heart had skipped a beat when you had stepped out. You had been in the midst of flipping your medium length styled hair back and out of your face as you shut the door. Wearing a 70's themed white eyelet lace top, and a pair of light blue shorts that settled over your hips nicely.

You were fifteen, sun-kissed nicely with a nice tan ontop of already gleaming olive skin. You were shorter than what Jimin had expected, though he seemed to be a full foot or two taller than you, which pleased him a great amount.

He remembers that when your bold dark eyes had settled on his, that he had decided then and there that your pictures absolutely did not do you justice.

Because you were absolutely beautiful, and no matter how hard a professional photographer would try, pixels could not compare to the real thing.

He had stopped in place, a stunned feeling washing over his body, stuck in the middle of the sidewalk between your house and the impressive car.

And to his utmost surprise, and perhaps horror, you had sauntered right up to him, a smile tugging at the corner of your lips, sticking a hand out towards him, while the other carried a medium sized box.

“Hi,” you had said in a sweet melodious voice. “I'm Y/N. Are you one of Taehyung's friend's?”

Three years had passed since that day. You both were three years older. Both three years wiser, three years more mature, but you had only grown more beautiful and further out of Jimins league.

But three years, and rarely was it that Jimin ever got to see you, considering your parents forced you to attend a boarding school four hours away. And even though Jimin had known you for three years, he still didn't know why you were forced to leave every year while Taehyung attended public school here in Busan.

And even though you only spent a numbered time together you two had grown fairly close.

“If looks could kill, Hoseok would be dead twenty times over.” A voice Jimin recognizes far too easily says from beside him. He's sitting on a nearby rock, eyes peeled to you and Hoseok who are now rocking slowly to a different song he can't quite decipher.

“Go away Jin.” Jimin says, not bothering to look in Seokjin's direction, but Jin's words do sort of make him realize how openly he had been staring, and worried that his cover may have been blown, he decides to glance to the left, taking in the sight of Taehyung sitting on the edge of the cliff, legs dangling over the edge. Every now and again he looks over his shoulders at the dancing pair, and lets out a laugh. A laugh that only screams I'm drunk so everything is fucking funny to me.

“Is that anyway to be speaking to the only person who knows your secret?” Jin says a moment later, voice nonchalant as he stands beside the rock Jimin is sitting on.

“It's not a secret,” Jimin lies easily, not taking enough time to think over his words before speaking them. Therefore they come out unbelievable. His hands encircle the base of the half empty beer bottle in his possession.

“Yeah, and I'm not craving to be balls deep in Namjoon right now.”

Jimin looks up and to Seokjin, a bewildered expression crossing over his features at the words his friend has just spoken.

“Both are complete and utter fucking lies.” Jin finishes with a crude smile sliding up his lips.

“Too much information-”

“When do you plan on telling her?”” Jin interrupts his sentence, catching him completely off guard.

Jimin glances to the watch on Seokjin's wrist. “Oh, so it's eleven? Then in about never.”

Jin's lips pull into a thin line, eyebrows moving to pull together.

“Nothing will change if you stay silent. You won't be together if you never tell her.”

And perhaps Jin has a point, actually Jimin absolutely knows that Jin has a point, and even though he doesn't want to admit it, Jin is right.

But Jimin had decided awhile back that coming clean to you, with his feelings, was just something he wouldn't do.

“And what's the point of admitting my feelings, Jin? So Taehyung can sucker punch me in my face? So, if the odds are in my favor and she actually does reciprocate my feelings, which she doesnt, then to try for a long-distance relationship just to discover that it won't work out? That'll be more painful than what it's worth. I won't put her through that. Absolutely not.”

For a moment Jin is silent, but the look settled on his face makes Jimin think for a split second that he is going to hit him.

“First of all, Taehyung wouldn't do that. You are, afterall, his bestfriend. It's obvious, so don't try to deny it. Plus you're the least promiscuous of us all, the one with the most genuine heart. And as for a relationship – I don't know, neither do you, you can't be sure about what will occur so trying to guess is absolutely pointless and you know it. And here's the facts: if you don't do anything, then nothing will happen, Jimin.”

Jimin isnt so sure about what to say, so instead he stays silent. Pink lips pursing together as he thinks over Jin's words. Letting them drift through the night air and soak into his brain.

He wanted to tell you.

He really did. If not in hopes that you did feel the same way and that these feelings weren't one sided, then solely for the fact of getting it off of his shoulders. He had thought up several ways of doing so, practiced in front of his mirror more times than he could remember, and had searched online for different ideas, but whenever it came down to it, he always chickened out.

“I still can't believe you dyed your hair, Chim.” Comes a voice too high pitched to be Jin's. Your sudden presence nearly causes Jimin to jump out of his skin, and when he turns to face you, it's with wide eyes, and a look of concern covering his face, fearing that you may have heard the conversation that occurred a mere few seconds ago.

Glancing over your face, Jimin feels lucky because you show no tell-tale signs of overhearing anything not meant for your ears.

And as your eyes meet his he swears all the alcohol flowing through his veins drains right then and there, because he feels stone cold sober.

Jimin stays silent and still as you outstretch an arm and press the palm of your hand in his freshly dyed locks. Your fingers curling around the different strands as you run the tips through the silk like feel of his hair. He refrains from closing his eyes and tilting into the touch, afraid of what it may cause you to do or think.

So instead he keeps a steady smile on his lips, and his eyes peeled to yours.

You're standing a few feet away from Jimin, but he can still smell the fragrance of whatever fruity perfume you've applied. Can still see the shine of your lips, indicating that you've glossed them over with something cherry, because cherry things taste better Jimin! A winecooler is settled in one of your hands as the other shows no signs of leaving Jimin's hair anytime soon.

“I know, right? I wasn't expecting it either. Almost like he did it just for you.” Jin's voice says outloud, Jimin immediately tenses at his friend's banter, and though it appears to be just that, banter of good sorts, Jimin knows the ulterior motive behind his eldest friends words. He turns his head towards Jin, eyes locking with his and he raises an eyebrow, hoping to throw him a look that screams knock it the fuck off.

If you notice the strange behavior, you don't say.

Jimin then looks behind you, glancing at Hoseok who is now sitting beside Taehyung. Their conversation mute as they glance towards the water waiting below.

“Aw,” your sweet voice pulls him back. His eyes immediately meeting your own. “Did you dye your hair just for me, Chim?” You ask jokingly, and he swears he hears Jin snicker in the background. He was definitely going to get it later.

You watch as the corner of Jimin's plump lips lift upward into an award winning smile, one that's always been your favorite.

“Oh please, to do such a drastic thing means that you have to like the person you did it for, even just a little bit.” There's a playfulness you instantly recognize in his voice.

“Ass,” you say as you retract your hand from Jimin's hair, jutting your bottom lip outwards. You then turn to Jin, who has an amused expression written on his face. “Always knew you were my favorite.”

Seokjin really does laugh at that, and you don't get it because you didn't think that it was quite that funny, but with the lift of your eyebrows and a raise of your shoulders you shrug it off.

A moment after Jin's recollected himself his lips part as he asks you a question.

“So Y/N, how's boarding school?” He asks, nice voice filling the air.

Jimin watches your lips as they part, when you let out a sigh. You then lean your head backwards as a groan escapes your small mouth.

“Please, Jin, I know you're trying to be nice, but this is the only time I get away from that wretched prison they call a school. And when you ask me questions like that, you remind me of an estranged family member who isn't at all the least bit interested, but asks out of pure obligation.”

This extracts a laugh from both Jimin and Jin's mouths.

“That bad?” Jimin asks you a moment later, eyes suddenly full of pity.

“You've got no idea, Chim. It's horrible.” You say before stepping forward, and without asking for permission you take a seat on Jimin's legs.

For a moment you think you feel Jimin tense, which causes something inside of you to shift uncomfortably. You and Jimin had always been a bit touchy, but you were always touchy with everyone. It wasn't a big deal, at least not to you. You're about to question his odd behavior, but then the tension seems to leave his body.

Your legs dangle outwards, sitting on both of his legs sideways, your legs outstretching across the remainder of the rock.

“I'm serious. It's fucking horrible. I don't know if I can handle one more year there.” A sudden frown forming on your lips.

Jimin sets his now neglected beer bottle down somewhere he isn't sure, he raises a hand before extending a finger to the dimple on the right side of your cheek. The one that forms only when you frown, which is odd.

Your words entice a more solemn expression to stretch across Jin's face, his arm outstretching as his hand moves to press against your face, Jimin swears his heart skips a beat at the sight, with a glance towards Jin out of the corner his eye, he can see that Jin has done it on purpose, just to get a reaction out of Jimin.

He watches, keeping a grimace at bay with a bite of his tongue as you nuzzle your face into his hand. “M'sure this last year will just fly by, it'll be over before you know it.”

“Yeah, I don't know.” You lift your shoulders up into a slow shrug and Jimin wants to push on the matter more, but he decides against it, noticing your blunt responses towards the matter.

“Chim,” your voice sounds into the night a moment later. Your head turning up so your eyes can meet his. “Wanna go for a walk?”

Jimin hesitates, but his head nods in response. Waiting until you've stood up to do so himself, and with one last look thrown over his shoulder towards Seokjin, the smirk he's met with says it all.

Jimin likes it best when it's the just two of you. That way it feels more intimate. Not that you guys do anything that could be classified as something more than just friend's, but being alone in your presence makes him feel special.

Like he's somehow earned the privilege to bask in the existence of artwork before it's been finished. Because that's just what you are, a masterpiece that has yet to be complete.

Jimin doesn't think he's ever seen you look as beautiful as you do right now. You had let your hair out of the pony tail to sway in the gentle breeze, your dark brown eyes almost blending into the night sky. Your makeup is smudged around your eyes, and the smile on your face has him seeing stars. And no, it's not because they are infact shining in the sky.

Out of the corner of Jimin's eye he can see you shiver, the cool air starting to get to your exposed skin, causing it to goosebump. Your small hands moving to grasp either one of your forearms in attempt to keep warm.

It doesn't surprise you when Jimin quickly shucks off his leather jacket and offers it to you. For a moment you almost refuse it, but after thinking through it one more time, you know refusing it won't do you any good, so you thank him and then quickly pull it over your shoulders.

And it doesn't surprise you because Jimin has always been nice to you, has always treated you kindly, with the utmost respect.

When you were younger and Taehyung's friend's couldn't be bothered, it was Jimin who always made sure you didn't feel left out. It was Jimin who always listened and communicated with you, Jimin who always made you feel included. You're not sure why he had always been so kind, but you're thankful for him for it.

“You wanna know something?” You ask a moment later, not entirely knowing where the words that are about to venture from your mouth come from.

“Enlighten me.” He says, soft voice breaking out into the air gently.

You turn your head when he responds, eyes finding Jimin's, as a smile starts to tug at your pink tinted lips.

“I think you're starting to become my favorite reason to return home.”

You turn your head after you've stated that, you're not entirely sure why you do it. Perhaps, you're afraid that he'll somehow see under your skin and to your soul, discovering things that you have not yet been able to admit to yourself out loud. Things that you're not sure you'll ever be able to speak for the world to hear.

But it's because of your shyness, that you are unable to see the way that red slowly starts to fade over Jimin's cheeks.

You're close enough to the side of the cliff that you can look over the rocks and see the water rushing below, but you are not close enough to be considered in danger, and even if you were, there is no doubt in your mind that Jimin wouldn't do anything in his power to save you from a fall that would surely kill you.

The thought brings you warmth, just like the boy himself.

After a moment of silence, you decide to break it.

“I don't wanna go back Chim.”

Jimin hears you say, your voice soft but loud enough to be heard over the distinct sound of the waves rushing over rocks.

And before he can purse his lips together to keep his thoughts at bay, they are rushing out in form of words he wasn't expecting.

“Why do you go?” Jimin finds himself blurting out, a hand moving out from the pocket of his jeans to press over his mouth a second too late. A shock resembling electricity brushing through him once he realizes what he's asked.

Something that wasn't any of his business, something that he had no right to ask.

He watches as the smile on your face slowly starts to transition into not a frown, but a narrow line. It showing that you're clearly not too comfortable with this topic. In result, your hands grasp tighter around the sleeves of the bulky leather jacket you're wearing. Your dark eyes stay glued to the rocks beneath your feet as you finally allow your lips to part a small amount.

“It's not something I'm particularly proud of, if you couldn't tell. Most kids don't get sent to boarding school for no reason at-”

He interrupts quickly, not wanting to force you in the least bit.

“You don't have to tell me-” He goes to say, but with a shake of your head you silence him.

“I trust you.” Is what you say, finally lifting your head and turning so your eyes can reach his once again. “I know you Jimin, I know you won't judge me.” And then you let the corners of your lips lift up into a somewhat forced smile.

Jimin silently notes that it looks strange on your face.

“Well,” you breathe out. “Let's just say that I lost my virginity at fourteen.”

The sentence takes Jimin by surprise.

But not for the reason most would think.

Was that the sole reason for your parents sending you away? For forcing you to attend a school?

“Yeah,” you say a moment later, when Jimin doesn't respond. You tear your eyes away from his, now focusing on the view ahead.

“I know - it's a messy situation. But basically, my parent's found out and they freaked out. Immediately thought that I was going to get pregnant in highschool or become a sex addict or something, so they decided to pack up my bags and send me away rather than dealing with me. They decided to make me someone elses problem.”

Your footsteps tread lightly across black rocks, white teeth moving to push down into your bottom lip after you've released your best kept secret out into the open. Or at least what you thought was your best kept secret.

It's silent for a moment longer than you think is okay. This causing you to become just slightly uneasy. You knew that Jimin of all people would be the last to judge you, but your anxiety starts to raise despite the well known fact.

“Well.” Jimin says a moment later, taking a few seconds to absorb this new found information he had just discovered, the one word is enough to ease all traces of nerves starting to form in your being. Enough to calm the zoo in your stomach, to tame the bile in the bottom of your throat.

His next words, you don't expect.

“If you're a problem, then you're the prettiest problem I've ever seen.”

As soon as he had stated it, you had moved your eyes back to his, only to find his already primed for your gaze. Jimin wishes he could look away, but he can't, because staring into your eyes is something he'll never get tired of.

A few seconds pass before you offer him a warm smile, not quite knowing how to respond to such unexpected and kind words. Words that cause too many emotions to stir inside of you. And then, before you're forced to come up with some sort of retort, he's speaking again.

“So,” he says and the tone of which his voice sounds is a little off, like he's not entirely sure he should say what he wants to. So with a raise of your eyebrows you urge him to continue, eager yet nervous to find out what he's about to say.

“Was it just the one time, or did it happen -”

You cut him off quickly with a sound of a scoff. A cringe starting to overtake your facial features.

“You pervert, trying to get information to store away later for your wank bank.” You tease, nose scrunching up in playfulness.

“Oh my god, Y/N,” he rushes out, “It's not like that I promise.”

“I'm joking, you dweeb. But, to answer your question no. It wasn't just the one time, I've had sex multiple times with multiple people,” you tilt your head to the side before continuing, “which is why I'm pretty sure my parents keep me there.”

You let your arms dangle to your sides, and you swear you can feel the heat radiating from Jimin's hand.

“That's so unfair,” Jimin finds himself saying. “Taehyung has sex all of the time and—”

“Okay, gross. I definitely didn't need to know that.” You squeal, lifting a hand to rush through you medium cut hair, a chuckle escaping your lips as you do so.

“-- You know what I meant, you loser.” Jimin says, staring straight ahead, just like you. “It's just unfair that they send you away for the same thing they don't discipline Taehyung for. I mean, I bet Taehyung's fucked more people than you've kis-”

“That wouldn't necessarily be hard to beat.” You cut him off, your eyes scrunching a moment after you've admitted.

You turn your head towards him a second later, your eyes watching as his eyebrows furrow curiously. One of them cocking upwards as if to ask a question.

And then:

“When's the last time you were kissed?”

And to say that you didn't see this question coming, wouldn't be exactly true. Still, you tilt your head to the side as you try to pinpoint when the last time was. Raising a finger to press the tip of it to your chin as you do so.

You both have made it off of the rocks, and now are walking through the forest surrounding the cliffs, heading in the direction where Jimin's and Seokjin's cars are parked.

There is a track formed into the Earth, caused by a plethora amount of tires that have been driven through the forest. Something that started back way before any of you had even been thought of. To say the cliff's were a popular place for teenagers to hang out, would be a complete understatement.

“I can't exactly recall, but if I had to guess, probably,” you hesitate lifting a finger and then two as you speak, “a year, or two perhaps?”

Jimin's eyes widen in shock, your words causing him to stop abruptly. His sudden actions cause you to do the exact same, worried for a split second.

“Two years?” He asks in a voice that resembles bewilderment. “That's-- that's a long time – it's so hard to believe.”

You're not sure whether you should take that sentence as a compliment or an insult.

“Really?” You ask, your arms moving to cover over your chest. “And why's that?” You suddenly feel the need to defend yourself.

Jimin's eyes glance from the cross of your arms and to the expression he can't quite decrypt covering your face, causing him to suddenly become nervous. He hadn't meant to upset you, he had just truly been taken by surprise.

His head tilts downwards as he lifts a hand to the back of his neck, scratching the skin there – a habit he does when he's nervous.

“Well uh, because you're beautiful. And I religiously believe that beautiful people should often be kissed.”

His statement takes you by utter surprise, threatening to knock you over as soon as the words are spoken. Rarely had you ever been called beautiful, only by older men who tried to get into your pants, or by your family members, but by a friend – by Jimin, never.

You don't know how to react, so you stand there stunned for a few seconds, hoping to god that the heat rising to your cheeks can't be seen from where Jimin stands. You let his compliment slowly settle in your brain, letting your eyes stare directly at his face, which is still tilted downwards.

Luckily for you, he clears his throat, distinctly trying to change the subject, resuming the movements of his feet once again, causing you to do the same. Neither of you look at each other for awhile, both still trying to recover from Jimin's confession.

“Anyway, as for you going back,” he says, referring to the start of the topic. “You think you're the one who has it hard?” He questions into the air, letting himself stare at you from the corner of his eye, only to find that the start of his sentence has seemed to grasp your full attention.

“I'm the one that has to say goodbye to you every summer, Y/N. Have to watch you get on that train, and disappear for an entire year. It hurts.” He says it in a teasing tone, but you can't help but to wonder if there's a truth that lies beneath his words.

“Wow, you say that like you actually care about me.” You tease into the air, attempting to joke along.

In retaliation to your words he moves a hand from one of the pockets of his jeans and places it over his chest where his heart sits, his head shaking in a disapproving way.

“Y/N, you wound me. But frankly if you haven't pieced together how much I care about you by now, then you're not as smart as I thought you were.”

You let out a loud laugh at that, one that causes your head to tilt backwards, and Jimin swears that it's his new favorite sound.

“Careful,” you say as you recover, the smile on your face seeming to be too big for your lips. “If I didn't know you better, I'd say that you're starting to sound like you're in love with me or something.”

Jimin feels his blood run cold at the sound of those words venturing out from your lips. He halts suddenly, not being able to tear his eyes away from your back as you continue to walk ahead of him a few paces, completely oblivious to the fact that he's fallen behind. And though you've regathered your attention and settled it on the stars, your ears are still listening when he speaks his next sentence.

A sentence that you're definitely sure you weren't supposed to hear. – Not yet, at least.

“Would that be such a crime?”

A second after he's spoken those words, he curses himself. Hoping to himself that he had spoken them softly enough for you to be unable to hear. But you stop suddenly, and Jimin swears he feels the vomit rise in his throat.

He watches as your head turns over your shoulder, and Jimin stills. Afraid of what you will say.

You part your lips to speak.

“Wanna go somewhere?” You ask.

He lets out an inaudible sigh of relief, thinking that he had gotten lucky and that you hadn't heard.

And hell if he was going to refuse a chance at more alone time with you.

Whenever you're around, Jimin feels like he's hanging by a moment. It's been this way since as long as he can remember. From the first sentence you had ever spoken to him, to the most recent.

He feels like the only thing connecting him to the edge of the cliff that he feels likes he dangling off of, is just a tiny bit of thread. Thread that threatens to break at any given moment.

He watches as you run through the wheat field the two of you have found yourself in, admires you as you giggle when the tips of the wheat tickle the skin of your thighs that remain unclothed. He swears he dives a little more into you when you turn your head over your shoulder with a wide grin stretched across your pink lips. A grin formed just for him to see.

You had both started in the car earlier that night, Jimin insisting on driving even though you put up a fight. Because rarely was it that you ever drove anywhere, and when were you given the chance? With a school that hardly ever went on any trips, and a strict rule that forbid any of the students from leaving the school ground's it was impossible.

You had thought that him refusing to allow you to drive was because of his own selfish reasons, but in reality it was because Jimin liked the way you looked with the wind blowing back your hair while he drove down the highway.

Your skin had been glistening in the night light, one of your arms danging out of his car, while you let your hand surf the wind. Your head had been hanging out of the window, your face upwards so you could gaze at the stars as he drove. The entirety of the drive you had screamed out the lyrics to whatever song was playing on the radio, laughing while you had done so. And Jimin had struggled, had found it so incredibly difficult to focus on the road ahead, but with your safety on the line – it was enough to prompt him to keep his eyes where they were supposed to be. But, even then, it could not keep him from staring at you out of the corners of his eye.

Neither of you had bothered to reach out to the others or shoot anyone a text to let them know that you two had left. Figuring that they'd figure it out soon enough, that it would be obvious when the two of you hadn't returned.

When the two of you had reached Jimin's car, there was no set destination in either one of your minds. You had just gone where the roads had taken you, and that just so happened to be an old gravel road, where Jimin stopped his car by a great huge wheat field guarded by a barbwired fence, one that was just too easy to slide underneath.

And that's how you both had found yourself running through the tall strands of wheat, laughing as you had done so.

But soon enough you both had tired yourselves out, clearly not very athletic in the way you had shortened of energy so quickly.

Jimin was currently resting in the wheat field, laying down ontop of the Earth; his arms strewn underneath his head in an improvised pillow. You had taken it upon yourself to mimic his actions, copying him quickly and laying down beside him.

Two pair of eyes were staring up at the night sky, the stars twinkling beautifully above the two of you. Conversation had flowed between the two of you easily, ranging from arguments reflecting on The Backstreet Boys or Nsync, to discussion based on whether the two of you thought that aliens existed, to asking each other about the future.

You had responded with something about leaving. You had always wanted to travel, to escape the hell hole you were forced to live, and just be free. Jimin had asked if you'd take him along, and you had responded with a smile that caused his heart to jump in his chest and the words of If not you, then who?

When you had asked him the same question, a million thoughts ran wildly through his head, but the one that screamed louder than any of the others was:

I don't care, as long as I'm with you.

But he had bitten back the words, replaced them with a cliché answer of, I'm not sure. You had scoffed and rolled your eyes.

In the midst of your pointless discussions, Jimin's arm had circled around your shoulders and pulled you closer into his body, causing your head to rest easily against his chest. Your free arm moving to cascade effortlessly across the middle of his stomach, fingers curling into the side of his hip.

Neither of you had been quite this touchy before. And you couldn't blame the sudden bursts of affection on the alcohol in your body, because you both were sober, whether you wanted to admit it or not.

That's when Jimin's words start to repeat in your mind, like a cd stuck on replay.

You're beautiful.

Would it be such a crime?

You're beautiful. I religiously believe that beautiful people should be kissed often.

Would it be such a crime?

You find yourself silently wondering, and maybe perhaps hoping that Jimin had finally accepted the truth, had finally seen it for himself.

You shake the thoughts out of your head, raising an arm upwards to point towards a constellation in the sky.

“That's my favorite,” you state, eyes not leaving the stars. “Orion.”

It's silent for a moment, and you think you can feel eyes staring at you, but you don't look.

“Tell me the myth.” Jimin says, knowing that you want to.

You hesitate for a moment, white teeth moving down to press into the skin of your bottom lip. The story you were familiar with, could recite it as easily as your first name.

“It starts with the Goddess Artemis.” You begin, letting your arm fall back to your side. “They say that she could love with the heat of a thousand fires, but she also could be cold and unforgiving. She was the goddess of virginity, hunt, the forest and the moon.

They say that from the moment Orion's eyes laid on Artemis he had fallen in love, and the same could be said for her,” you once again, think you feel Jimin tense underneath your body, so in result you tilt your head towards him, only to find a smile placed upon his lips.

Your eyes find his before continuing.

“Orion was a great hunter, much like Artemis, so that's where their friendship began, bonding over hunting.” You move your hand from across Jimin's stomach, uncurling your fingers from his hip and slide it along the fabric of his shirt, letting it rest gently against the material of his shirt when it reaches his chest.

“Now, Artemis had a twin brother named Apollo, a brother who was very protective over her to say the least – and when he heard that she – who was the goddess of virginity, had met and perhaps even fallen in love with a man, he had grown worried that his sister would break her vow.

Apollo had gone to the forest in hopes to find his sister, to find out if she was in fact still a virgin, and when he stumbled upon the two of them - Artemis and Orion, asleep and laying in each others arms, he had panicked and immediately assumed the worst.

Later that night, when Artemis had woken up from her nap, to find the night growing quickly, she had decided to go hunt, knowing that Orion would be hungry when he woke up. And when Orion awoke to see that Artemis wasn't by his side, he had decided to go to the river to swim, one of his favorite hobbies.

Apollo saw an opportunity and he chose to take it.”

You pause, letting out a breath. You then retract your hand from Jimin's torso and pull it back down to your side, your eyes still staying focused on his, and you're surprised to see that he is starting at you intently, looking very enraptured by your words.

“He had stumbled upon his sister and had lied to her, saying he had seen a giant stag by the river. The huntress, who had no luck killing anything that night, had hurriedly rushed to the river. Once there, Artemis could see something by the water, but it was too dark for her to notice that it wasn't a stag, but the man whom she loved.

Carefully she aimed her bow at Orion, and without a seconds worth of hesitation released an arrow. Afterward, she had swam across the river to claim her prey and when she stumbled upon the target she had hit, she became overwhelmed with grief.

She tried to bring him back to life, but his soul had left his body, it was too late. So while his body rested lifeless in her arms, she had decided to cast him up into the sky, so that he could live forever. So that she could see him for the rest of her days.”

You pause.

“They say she lost a piece of herself that night, when the love of her life died. And, I can only hope to experience a love that great one day.” You let out a breath afterwards, once again turning your head in the direction of the stars. “So yes, that's the story of Orion, and jesus, the stars are so beautiful.”

Jimin is silent for awhile. Not being able to remove his eyes from the top of your head, not being able to think about anything else but the only thing that matters to him in the universe: you.

You were his Artemis, without a doubt.

Jimin took a note in that moment, that watching you talk about something you enjoyed was one of his favorite things. He was going to do it a lot more from now on.

The tips of Jimin's short fingers are cascading through your messy locks, and even though he is sure that the stars are in fact, beautiful. It is you who has captured his attention.

“Yeah,” Jimin states, a moment later, you not being able to feel his eyes as they stare directly at your face. “Very beautiful.”

Driving you home proves to be much harder than Jimin anticipated.

Driving you home proves to be much more eventful than what Jimin planned.

Because driving you home is when it happens.

You're belting out the lyrics to an ending song, and it's when a song Jimin doesn't recognize starts to play, and you turn towards him, a smile on your face, yelling out the words, “One of my favorites, an oldie but a goodie!” It's when the verse I'm falling even more in love with you plays into the car, that it happens.

And Jimin stops.

Quite literally.

He slams on the breaks, his car coming to a quick and abrupt stop right there in the middle of the empty highway.

His hand immediately reaches for the volume dial before switching the music all the way to low, eager to get the song to stop ringing in his ears.

You sit there in the passenger's seat, shocked into silence. Your eyes blinking slowly as your head turns to him, eyebrows uplifting. You wait a moment, hoping that he'll turn towards you, but when a moment passes and he doesn't, you start to worry your thoughts out loud.

“Jimin?” You ask, only to get no response.

“Jimin.”

Silence.

“Jimin?” you say, though it comes out in more of a question type form.

Your voice is soft and reminding Jimin of why – he stops suddenly.

Head turning to face yours.

“Oh my god.” He blurts out, taking you by surprise. Your eyebrows cocking upwards.

You watch in curiosity and perhaps even horror as he pushes open the driver's side door and practically jumps out of the car. Your eyes stay peeled on him as he walks to the front of the car, and you're able to see his figure as he starts to pace back and forth in front of the headlights.

You're scared, to say the least.

Unsure about what to do.

You had never seen Jimin like this.

You had no idea what was going on.

Slowly, you pull open your door, stepping out of it and not wasting anytime before mimicking his actions and walking to the front of the car. You decide to keep your distance, taking a seat on the hood, though your feet reach the pavement of the road.

“Jimin?” You question out a moment later, and your voice – it causes him to stop suddenly.

And it's there, when he glances upwards and see's your face, your beautiful face, that it fully registers in his mind. That's when it all clicks.

Park Jimin had just found himself in the middle of having an epiphany, and you had been there to witness it all.

You had been the sole purpose of it all.

Your voice had been soft and it had reminded Jimin of one of the many reasons of why he had fallen in love with you.

He had just for the first time, admitted it to himself.

He was in love with you.

The feelings he harbored for you – they could only be described as so.

They weren't a crush, couldn't be described as such - not when they were this intense, this real, this powerful.

He was in love with you.

And it's when he looks at you, and a slow but knowing smile starts to slide across his lips that you realize why he had been acting so strange.

Because he had finally figured it out.

Park Jimin was in love with you.

He thought you were beautiful and he was absolutely in love with you.

And immediately, he wants to tell you.

And immediately you want him to finally speak it out loud, you finally want to hear him say it.

So you wait.

Wait to hear the words that you've imagined a million different times.

His mouth aches to spill the secret he's kept from you for years.

A secret he hadn't known was so strong until a mere few seconds go.

But then the weight, the effects of his feelings finally hit him.

And he feels like his world is falling apart.

But he was in love with you, and for all he knew, you weren't in love with him.

So instead of telling you, he decides to do what he does best and swallow his feelings.

It's there in that moment, when his smile falters the least bit, and his eyes flicker to the ground that all the hope you had been feeling vanquishes.

And then:

“You know.”

He says after a moment. And he's unsure how he's able to speak when the feelings he's just struggled to swallow are trying their best to claw their way back up.

He then glaces down towards the watch on his wrist. And you can tell by the split second it takes for him to look at the time, that he wasn't even studying it, that it was just an excuse.

“It's getting late, we should probably get going.” He quickly says. “Your parents and brother will be getting worried.”

He offers you a fake smile, one so obvious it makes you cringe.

And then he turns away from you, heading for the driver's side of the car.

And then, in that moment you find yourself refusing to accept that this has just happened.

That you both had been on the brink of starting something so beautiful, but had fallen short due to fears.

And it's there in that moment that you decide that you are tired of waiting and that you won't do it any longer.

You find your brain spitting out words you don't even have time to register.

“Are you going to keep pretending, or are you going to come over here and kiss me?”

Jimin halts at the words that have just slipped past your lips, his eyes widening as his brain processes them. And he's met with a stunned feeling washing over every bit of emotion flowing through his body.

Had he heard you correctly?

It takes him a moment to recollect his thoughts, to register that you really did just say what you did before he's turning around, achingly slowly.

His eyes flicker over yours, searching for any sort of sign that you were indeed joking, that perhaps this was just a dream, that he hadn't just heard what he thought he had, that maybe he had imagined it.

He raises an eyebrow, staring at you, only to be met with a stoic expression and jesus such a beautiful face

“What--” he pauses, forcing the words out. “W-what did you just say-”

“I said,” you interrupt, growing a little impatient.

But you can't help but allow the smile to form on your lips.

“Are you going to keep pretending or are you going to come over here and kiss me, Jimin? If I'm not as delusional as I think I am, then you like me. And I'm tired of waiting, so are you going to keep pretending. And if so, for how long?” You pause, letting out a breath.

“And do you really not think I see the way you stare at me when you think you're being subtle? You stare at me with such an intensity that I can basically feel it. So, are you going to keep pretending Jimn or are you going to come over here and kiss me because I'm not sure how much longer I can wa-”

You're interrupted by a pair of lips that could only belong to the other person in the area.

You had been so focused on rambling that you hadn't noticed the change in Jimin's demeanor. The step he'd take toward you with every word spoken, the relieved expression falling over his features.

Your eyes close immediately on impact, the thought he had interrupted disappearing easily.

He kisses you.

Jimin's red colored lips are soft as they press into yours, and you've been kissed before, multiple times, but nobody has ever kissed you quite like this.

Like your lips are essential to living, like they are needed to continue life.

He kisses you gently, large hands moving to press into each one of your cheeks, pads of his thumbs rubbing slow circles into the skin of them.

He fucking kisses you.

He kisses you.

And it's like your heart finally lets out a sigh of relief.

Like every bone in your body screams, “About fucking time.”

Because you love Park Jimin.

You are pretty sure a part of you always had - from the first time you had seen him: brown hair, baggy pants, and gawking at you from your sidewalk.

You love Park Jimin, and you had been waiting four summers for this kiss.

You were in love with Park Jimin and he finally realized he loved you back.

And it's there, in that moment, with his lips pressing into yours while in the middle of an empty highway, the only lights illuminating the night coming from the headlights of Park Jimin's car, that you know that despite the inevitable year that awaits to tear you from each other, despite the brother who will most definitely be shocked but excited because now Jimin can become his brother for real, everything will work out.

Because after all.

You love Park Jimin.

And after years of falsely identifying his feelings as just a crush, he finally allowed himself to see the truth. That he was in love with you.

a/n: so that was that, and again I have to apologize because if it's as bad as I honestly think it was, then your eyes have probably fallen out of your head. I'm not sure if I should even keep this here or not, oh my gosh. I had a friend read through it and she told me it was boring, which is why I’m not so sure about it. also if there are any grammatical errors, or sentences that just don't make sense, I apologize, but I knew that if I read through it one more time then I wouldn't have posted it. but, despite this all, I hope it was somewhat enjoyable. please feel free to let me know your thoughts and opinions! ♡ ps: when she is telling Jimin the myth of Orion and Artemis, the part that is italicized is not my writing.

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