Oh my🥵 girl Pete’s pussy is so🥵🥵🥵 I would do anything to have her sit on my face even it means I have to fight Patrick sorry man

I wanna join you in lusting over Pete's pussy but I can't stop laughing about you fighting Patrick

Hello Everyone!

My name is Jo, and i am the sole curator of this blog. This post will serve as both an introduction to me, as well as clearing up my intentions with this blog.

Let Us Begin!

So, to start, I should introduce myself.

As stated before, I am Jo! I use he/him pronouns. I identify as a binary gnc gay transgender man, though my identity itself is more complex than that(that isn't anyone's business, though.). My main account is @radspeon

I have always been interested in BL(boys love) content(also known as yaoi, though that is a more outdated term now.) to a certain extent. Recently, however, my interest in it has grown exponentially, and I decided to create a separate sideblog to post exclusively BL/yaoi-related content.

Intentions, Disclaimers, Et Cetera.

This blog will definitely showcase some problematic content, as most yaoi is, and I would like to make it clear that I don't support any unsavory themes that may appear in the media I talk about here. I am not a proshipper, nor am I an antishipper, I am in a neutral ground where I recognize that censoring art is bad, even if it is unsavory, while also recognizing that things like pornography depicting child characters(drawn, written, or otherwise) is bad.

I believe that the current 'shipping discourse' debate is silly, and refuses to take notice of the literary context in which many of these unsavory and problematic themes are handled. Proshippers and antishippers are very similar, except the core difference is that proshippers see the unsavory themes in a given media, and decide to take it at face value as a good thing and thereby romanticize it. Antishippers take unsavory themes in a given media and decide to take it at face value, much in a similar way to proshippers, but instead decide that the unsavory theme is unnecessary and pornographic on the authors part. That is my observation and opinion on the matter.

I acknowledge the poor quality of the representation in most classic yaoi series, and loudly laugh at it. This blog isn't meant to be serious, as the way I'm writing this may mislead you to believe. My URL is from a joke post, for god sake lol. This is why I have employed the #good rep and #bad rep tagging system, because I know how terrible many of these anime's/manga's are about representation. I'm a gay man myself, I like to believe that I can recognize good and bad representation, though I highly encourage other gay men to correct me if I ever miss things that count as bad/good representation in a given media.

Do not bring "who can participate in consuming/creating mlm media" discourse here.

I mean it, don't. I understand that you think you have a shiny new point to bring up about the conversation that you'd adore to talk about, but I'm telling you that,

No, you don't.

Even if you did, I do not want to hear it.

This blog is for everyone to enjoy, MLM media is for everyone to enjoy, we should not try to limit the consumption and creation of MLM media to just gay men. It's ridiculous to try to restrict artists to your standards of the "correct creator."

I realized I was gay and trans through reading BL manga as a child.

If we shame people who are not (currently) gay from reading/watching mlm media, they may never realize that the feeling of relation that they're feeling isn't just a want for a significant other.

Oh, and while we're on what I believe,

mspec lesbians and gays are valid, gnc trans people are valid, xenogenders are valid, neopronouns are valid, he/him lesbians and she/her gays are valid, non-dysphoric trans people are valid, people who use outdated terms to explain their own nuanced identity are valid, etc. etc. etc.

If you want to argue about this, do not be surprised when I block you.

TERFS, transmeds, exclusionists, all of you, get lost.

Blog URL Changes

yaoilover17473929-94747 --> pseudofujo (08/21/2023)

even though i don’t identify as a cis girl anymore, i’m still so fucking passionate about atypical cishets? because god, back when i ided as a cis girl, i constantly felt like shit for my attraction to men being abnormal and more similar to gay men’s experiences.

people think being cishet is fitting into cisheteronormativity but? it’s not??? cishets who crossdress, present gnc or androgynous, behave gnc or androgynous, feel a disconnect from their gender due to not fitting into gender roles, relate more to the opposite sex, face misdirected homo/transphobia, take on the opposite gender role in society/relationships, etc. exist.

because like? gender isn’t just “oh i identify as my agab, being a male, so i fit into the male gender role” nor is it “oh i’m a masculine woman but i still fit perfectly into the female gender role despite how different my experiences are from most women”

i’m just so passionate about this and i wish it was a more well known issue. it makes me hate the hate towards straight and cis people in lgbtq spaces even more than i already did. i think maybe that’s also part of why so many young people id as nonbinary now, because being cishet is “wrong” and “easy” even though being queer at all would make you lgbtq, even if you’re not trans or sga/ssa.

i just wanna give gnc cishets all the love in the world because they fuckin deserve it and shouldn’t feel pressures to id as something they’re not to get ACTUAL support. gnc people experience things so differently from gender conforming people, and there’s no support for cishet ones and that saddens the hell out of me

just? imagine being a very feminine cishet man who gets bullied for ‘being gay’ and struggles to find a woman who’s open to dating him when he takes on the feminine role in a relationship? and presents and behaves femininely? maybe gets mistaken as a girl depending on how he presents? doesn’t relate to the typical ‘male’ experience? relates more to womanhood despite identifying as a man? imagine getting no support for this? imagine being treated the same as your oppressors even though they oppress you as well, just in different ways? imagine being shunned out of queer spaces despite being queer just b/c you’re not lgbt, even though lgbt and lgbtq aren’t the same thing?

i use men as an example since gnc women are a LITTLE more accepted than gnc men, but only a little bit.

...maybe i’m too empathetic. idk. maybe i’ll make a blog for it. idk. i just know how i felt when i identified as a cis girl, and how i still feel now due to my lingering connection with being female, and it’s so isolating and makes you fucking hate yourself. i mean, i was/am bi, but my attraction to men was just so atypical, meanwhile my attraction to women wasn’t, and it felt like i could never talk about it or else i was ‘actually straight uwu’ and no one would understand anyway. no one understands nOW what it’s like to be attracted exclusively to feminine, gnc, queer, etc. men and how different it is from being attracted to the average man, how different it is as a female to be attracted exclusively to those types of men (types who are usually gay and therefore not into you), esp when hetero attraction is shit on by the lgbtq community lol, even if that attraction doesn’t conform to the standard (which would be queer by definition, but y’know)

i just hate tumblr and lgbtq culture’s way of acting like hetero attraction and experiences are all the same and all fit into the cisheteronormative mold, cause lemme tell you, i would’ve fucking killed to have gotten some hetero content i could ACTUALLY relate to and enjoy, esp without people saying it’s “””lesser””” than gay content lol. oh and let’s not forget how i could never talk about this without people saying “shut up straightie you have tons of content” like :))) genuinely fuck you.

even now, i can’t help but wonder if i’m really nonbinary or just subconsciously started identifying as such to feel more valid in my experiences. is my dysphoria gender related or do i just feel a disconnect from my gender due to the things i listed above???

a m/f relationship doesn’t inherently conform to cisheteronormativity!! a m/f relationship can be queer and you genuinely cannot change my mind on that!! i want content of a very feminine gnc man dating a very mascuilne gnc girl!! like a ‘twink’ dating a ‘butch’ for example!! that’s all i want god dammit!!!!!! maybe they even get mistaken as a gay couple sometimes who knows!!! and if you don’t like me using the word queer then pretend i used atypical instead!! the point is that atypical cishets deserve!! pride and support!!! and REPRESENTATION!!

i dunno. if anyone actually read all this and wants to help out with a blog for some gnc support/positivity then let me know. it’d be geared towards cisgender people who experience atypical heterosexual attraction, but be for anyone gnc in the end. i’m just... very passionate about this. it’s one of the things i’m most passionate about due to my own experiences, and i don’t really feel comfortable in the lgbtq community due to all of this shit. i don’t like my experiences, feelings, and struggles being erased. i don’t like m/f relationships being seen as inherently cisheteronormative. i don’t like cishets being shit on. i don’t like there being no representation for queer/atypical m/f couples. i don’t like there being no support for these people when!! they deserve it!! and belong at pride just as much as anyone else!!!!

when i say straight people deserve pride, i’m not referring to your typical straight person. i’m referring to the different ones, the ones that don’t conform to binary gender norms, the ones that face misdirected homo/transphobia, the ones that are queer, the ones that give a big “fuck you” to cisheteronormativity. and no, this does not mean that i think a guy liking pink would be queer; that’s not what i’m saying at all. liking things that are girly is different from being gnc. liking baking and clothes designing is very different from being a man who navigates society and relationships differently due to not conforming to the ‘male’ gender role.

not conforming to gender roles and being nonbinary are different but similar and valid things. i just... yeah. i could go on for hours, but i won’t. i just hope maybe someone out there understands what i’m trying to say. i want to make a difference and end the idea that cishets all conform to cisheteronormativity and don’t belong at pride. because yeah, ofc your typical cishet doesn’t need pride, but atypical ones? they’re more than deserving of it. they deserve to be proud in a society that shits on them for not adhering to their strict standards of how a person is ‘supposed’ to be. maybe i can turn ‘atypical cishet’ into a term, idk. i just want atypical cishets and those who experience atypical hetero attraction to have a community. maybe i could make a blog like that, too?

god i spent over an hour typing this up you can tell i’m passionate about it esp considering no one’s gonna read it (and if they do, will just get mad probably lol)

Theory time

Alright, so we all know through the context of this being written in a fanfiction/a03 format that this is all a play about canon VS fanon. What is a little hard to decipher is what are the things that are plays off fanon and which qualities are the true aspects of the characters(canon)? ANYWAY here are just a few of the things I am ASSUMING are plays off fanon based on my years in the fandom and sheer obsession of consuming this shit (trigger warning for everything taken place in the epilogue FYI):

-Dave: I think some of the main aspects of fanon influencing his epilogue version is intertwined with “woobifying”, “Slow burn”, and even possibly even “sexuality”. 

        -Woobifying is a fandom concept of reducing a character to “a cinnamon roll too pure for this world” someone you wanna baby (often applied to trans guy characters whether canon or headcanoned). This one is a bit of reach I’ll admit because it DOES makes sense that after years of living with Karkat the dude would soften up but there were times in the epilogue even Dave admits he’s gotten softer and the dude just plain out was very passive. In my time I’ve seen tons of depictions of Dave as a lot more emotional than shown in the comic or a lot more woobified in fics (like in meteor fics where he often has very dramatic emotional outbursts) By the way this is NOT me shitting on you if you like viewing Dave in that way because a lot people with trauma relate to him and use him for “cathartic release”(me fucking too lol). It’s more a guess/observation of maybe why he’s developed in this way due to the comic now being a strange sponge absorbing all fanon, good and bad, into it weird ass grasp.

        -Slow burn is likely the trope that plays into why the hell it took so fucking long for him AND Karkat to admit their feelings. If you have literally ever consumed Davekat content I’m sorry but 99% of it is slow burn lmao every meteor fic is pining, every coffee shop AU is the budding of a lifelong partnership, and every Harry potter furry inflation pwp crossover WHATEVER fic is 10k words building of sexual tension like......To bring their other relationships in canon into this we can see that Dave was able to flirt with Jade and Terezi and entered a relationship with them at a pretty normal rate WHICH can totally be attributed to the fact he views them as girls and himself as heterosexual so was much more comfortable making a move- sure. Looking at Karkat, however, and you see the dude is a little shy about romance sure but he was still able to flirt with Terezi and make awkward moves on John so like......I can’t help but to feel like something outside (us?) was influencing them?

        -Sexuality is another sort of reach but I think it’s something to consider. In terms of the comic....when exactly DID canon end? You could argue at the end of act 7.......or the moment John used his retcon powers to create a new timeline. Fandom Dave (on the tumblr side at least) was usually consider queer and a lot people shipped Dave with another dude. Perhaps John going back and rewriting canon helped bring our influence over Dave’s sexuality into the comic? I remember finding out Davekat was canon and confirming my “Dave is bisexual” headcanon and just thinking in wonder how it felt like Hussie was plucking my desires straight from my head and incorporating them. Which made me HAPPY by the way. If this is anywhere even near truth it’s not like he didn’t do a fantastical and natural job of incorporating it into the comic which shows how “incorporated fanon” is not a totally horrendous thing. The comics always done it with fandom memes and such. 

-Rose Lalonde. Not too sure what fanon influenes were brought onto her to be honest? In candy she was almost like a creepy stepford wife which is. Bizarre to me. Rose is the most contrary and rebellious character so seeing her settle down like that (OR FUCKING DOING SOME GUYS LAUNDRY) is a little strange. In meat she insists that she is an individual despite being married but that could have EASILY been Dirk’s influence? Also her biggest fandom stereotypes off the top of my head is Know-it-all smug meddler, alcoholic, and elegant. Really none of that was applied so still need to consider her more. The most damning thing however is where is all the piss?? If you look at the amount of piss kink rose fanfiction one has to wonder......and I can’t even continue this joke.

-Jade Harley: Gonna keep it real with ya’ll. I feel like this epilogue gave Jade Harley way more character. She wasn’t given much in canon except for lonely silly girl so it makes sense to me why she’d grow up desperate for physical bonds and inserting herself into relationships. I liked her telling John that she wasn’t some princess in a tower anymore cause it shows she KNOWS how everyone has always viewed her and that’s a little sad. As for tropes around her character.....yep people pleaser, silly girl, hippie, shoved aside for literally any other character......Need to think about her more, too. 

-Jake fucking English. What even is there to say? He more than anyone was influenced by fanon and it doesn’t take too much thought to see how. In a lot of fandom jokes and in fanfiction he is basically treated as a stupid piece of meat. I genuinely don’t read much fanfiction about him except from a trust few fans who I know care about him and will write him in a full rounded way. In any case we see a single moment in which Jake has this oppressive narrative taken away from him and it was when he was talking to Dave and Karkat during their election conversation. If that wasn’t already hard enough to read we can look back at the implied rape that took place with him in the beginning of Jane’s relationship with him or over the course of it. John, the one person supposedly not influenced by fanon as he’s still tied to the comic via retcon powers, is even the one to tell people that Jake is basically being raped. So yeah. Good times. I’ll get to Dirk in terms of Jake in a moment L M A O. Imagine that being the saddest lmao you ever just read.

-Jane Crocker: Welp hope you weren't a Jane fan lmao. What can I say except it FEELS like all the subliminal messaging really got to her and she’s like......warped by the condesce? I think if in the comic they showed more of her political takes then maybe this wouldn’t have come as such a shock. Like, I flat out am disgusted by her character now? She’s a facist, abusive, rapist(that was hint, unfortunately)? WOW good take homestuck writting staff?? I mean I know one of you used to write like incest pedo rape porn but aight??????????? Anyways in fanon Jane is treated as the girl who gets in the way of dirkjake so kinda that early 2000s bitchy yaoi girl brand, boring person in the background, or the hottie. They obviously kept saying she was “easy on the eyes” so there’s the hottie trope but that’s about it.

-Roxy Lalonde: Out of ALL the Alphas they fucking escaped with their goddamn dignity PFFT. So in terms of tropes: trans Roxy, alcoholic, and flirty “boy obsessed”. 

        -So with trans Roxy this is like Dave’s sexuality thing I discussed where a widely celebrated headcanon influenced canon and that not necessarily a BAD thing. Like I said, this theory is that canon is just absorbing fanon for better and for worse. I saw people were bummed they weren’t a trans girl but I am actually down with this for two reasons. 1) being all those memes “what’s your gender?” “the void” and 2) a part being friends with someone who’s trans is.....not being used to seeing them as the gender they actually are but taking the time to learn these new unfamiliar pronouns- and get the fuck over it. It’s their choice and you just gotta accept it despite your feelings. 

        -alcoholic Roxy was not at all incorporated which is the biggest fanon about her (not as much in recent years thankfully) so honestly? Kinda diminishes my argument. It’s not like the writers were worried that tossing out their progress as person was bad writing lol look at Dirk.

        -Flirty Rox. In candy they were SUPER fast moving in their relationship with John and despite towards the end they said that Dirk dying made them wanna do something with their life I just....don’t buy it? Mainly because john who is uninfluenced by the fanon tropes even noticed how fast they were moving and how stepford agreeable wife she’d become. 

-Dirk Strider. Aight. So. Here we go. fandom tropes are controlling puppet master, abusive, and cold/uncaring.

        -Dirk is a naturally controlling man, yes. Every version of himself struggles with this, yes. Even if we work on issues does not mean old flaws will never leak out, yes. However, after in the comic itself we see conversations with some of his closest companions and the effort he was making and ready to continue making was completely obliterated. Dirk is someone who takes his projects a little too seriously so why would he toss out this one- the most important one in his life? ANYWAY........Dirk in canon is shown that he’s also not great at multi-tasking or really anything that he really makes himself out to be AMAZING at. Don’t get me wrong I actually view Dirk as a complement dude cause he did get all the alphas into the session in a smoothish fashion (yes hal is him so it still counts) but, like, even when Dirk sounds like an AWESOME engineer to Jake he even admits that he basically had the future’s technology to help and it wasn’t that impressive. So now he’s claiming he’s the BEST? Wack.

        -Abusive Dirk......The sheer amount of people in the fandom who still misconstrue his character as heartless and the sheer amount of fanfiction of sociopathic Dirk might’ve done something. If he is truly becoming his “ultimate self” and he is heart aspect.....all these fanfiction splinters are getting applied to him as well, ya’ll. INCLUDING one of the epilogues writers who literally used to write fanfiction depicting Dirk as a brutally abusive and manipulative version of himself. With the similarities between their big fic and the homestuck epilogue I can’t help but to wonder if they’re subtly trying to incorporate that? After all Alt Calliope goes into detail about how the writer/narrator is IMPORTANT and when one is someone who enjoys viewing dirk as such....well who’s to say pfft Everything about how Dirk treated Jake was some of the most shocking to me. How did you get the guy taking most of the blame for a relationship gone wrong to a man who in a very rapey way makes someone obsessed with him, stupid, and unable to ever receive respect? Horrifying stuff to read, lads. It makes much more sense to me if you look at this fandom’s perceptions on DirkJake. My god there are some bad takes and there’s a whole section of the fandom who was hellbent on making the ship out to be the most problematic ship to ever occur. So whereas in the comic you have Dave pointing out that both sides had issues and everyone was willing to talk things out you had half the fandom insist that it was all Dirk’s fault and he just COMPLETLY forced himself on an unwanting Jake. Yep, sound familiar?

        -cold uncaring. yep tons of depictions of Dirk being cruel to his friends and family and sorry but go reread Homestuck I don’t even know what to tell you if you actually believe that. There’s literally nothing here I could write to help you. As if the whole thing about his character isn’t about how the people around him helped prevent him becoming like that and he hasn’t said in a dozen different ways how much he loves them and wants to treat them better. Get out of here with that shit lmao 

I guess all can be said about Dirk at this point is either 1) the absorption of the vast amount of terrible Dirk depictions from ascending to his ult self has warped him 2) he’s playing a villain just because Homestuck being over means not existing which TERRIFIES him and existing is a higher priority than treating the people around him right or 3) caliborn influence

        1) For the ascending I’m pretty sure this is the theory that’s gonna be right

        2) playing the villain is probably not what it is because on twitter all of the writers are saying the transphobia is literally just him and they’re boosting a lot of theories say “this is a story about friends you love disappointing you and you moving on” So. Yeah. Take that depressing nugget of information. (I literally will be fucking dead inside if that really is where this story is taken. No joke I will probably quit this fandom lol don’t know if any of you really know how big that is for me to say

        3) Caliborn? eh maybe who the fuck knows after typing that last bullet point out I’m too bummed to continue this hah

I still can’t see Mutsuki as female, I don’t think it’s completely confirmed either, Ishida himself is confused by them, that’s why I’m hesitant. He also comments about how Mutsuki is swirled around with gender, which is ambiguous in its meaning. Even though Ishida uses female pronouns for Mutsuki, I just can’t leap to the immediate conclusion that Mutsuki is a woman, because that would be ignoring all the things that happened in canon that make Mutsuki not a woman.

I was really shocked last night, lol, and immediately messaged like 5 of my TG friends like TALK TO ME. Lol. 

Here’s the thing: author interviews and commentary can be disregarded if the story did not show this. Death of the author, baby. So I definitely think you can interpret Mutsuki as transgender. 

I think it is completely valid for people to still interpret Mutsuki as transgender, but not to harass other fans or interpret them as being transphobic for finding Mutsuki a woman. See, the ending had Mutsuki dressed very masculine, still presenting as a man as far as we knew, with even shorter hair, etc. Of course you can interpret that as dropping the gender plotline and say the story, as far as we knew, depicted Mutsuki as presenting as a man in the end. Ishida’s comments do not change that, because he did never show Mutsuki reconciling with a female identity, so you’re absolutely entitled to interpret Mutsuki as a man.

However, it’s also valid for some fans to see Mutsuki as a woman and to take this as confirmation, because as much as it would have been great if it was clear in canon, it really wasn’t, not from the Auction Arc when Mutsuki thought of herself as different from men. That being said, it was never clear Mutsuki thought of herself as a woman either, as you say--there are plenty of implications both ways (for example, Mutsuki was usually out of control and psychotic when thinking of herself as a woman, but sane when thinking of herself as a man), so it really was confusing and not well presented. 

Personally, I answered this once that I did think the story was heading towards Mutsuki reconciling with a female identity. I did not like it and thought it a transphobic plotline (and I still think this--more on that later), even if unintentionally so. Culture is also a thing, and in Japanese fandom Mutsuki was never really seen as transgender, according to what I understand. 

So for me, I take it as confirmation Mutsuki sees herself as female. That being said, I don’t really like that, as I said in my post last night, because fiction doesn’t occur in a vacuum, and if you’re addressing such a real-world issue... dropping the ball on that is really hurtful for some fans. Mutsuki’s arc didn’t have a resolution, and I’ve posted more than enough salt about that so I won’t go there, but the fact that the ending if anything seemed to support the transgender interpretation meant that I really expected to use “he/him” for Mutsuki forever. To drop this information in an extra feels really lazy writing-wise (a Rowling move?), and again this isn’t to fault Ishida, but to say that I think it’s just going to hurt some fans. 

I’m also not thrilled with the reducing of Mutsuki’s arc to gender, since it concerned sexual abuse, child abuse, mental illness/psychosis, etc., and I’ll just say that while no one fully understands their characters and I totally relate to Ishida discovering characters as you write them--including triggering content and subject matter and then dropping all of them in the end so that they never matter for the story or get resolution is... not good. Ishida prioritizing his own health is totally what he should have done and I don’t fault him, please don’t think I’m saying he should’ve slaved away and sacrificed his own health even more for a good resolution to Mutsuki’s arc, but I... can also call it irresponsible writing. I call Yoshida Akimi’s ending for Banana Fish, which she wrote in a very bad personal place and I understand and think people should have compassion for that, irresponsible writing, and I think of this as similar. If you take on a controversial, painful topic for many people, you probably should be aware that you might hurt people if not handled with care. 

My opinion is still the same: people should refer to Mutsuki using whichever pronouns they feel are the most appropriate. For myself, I’m switching to female pronouns, but I totally understand people thinking the story’s dropping of the ball means that Mutsuki is trans, and don’t fault people for using male pronouns. I think that each person should interpret Mutsuki’s gender how they are personally comfortable. Insulting/shaming other fans for doing opposite is really terrible.