#which is ouchie ouch ow | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

Visit Blog

Explore Tumblr blogs with no restrictions, modern design and the best experience.

Fun Fact

BuzzFeed published a report claiming that Tumblr was utilized as a distribution channel for Russian agents to influence American voting habits during the 2016 presidential election in Feb 2018.

#which is ouchie ouch ow

edwardshundredyearoldspunk · 6 months

Text

I'm such a fucking liar going off about how much "I lOvE tRaGeDiEs" and how "mOrE sToRiEs ShOuLd Be TrAgEdIeS!" until I watch a tragedy and I'm sobbing into my pillow at 8 in the morning after finishing something that ended tragically (again, something that I continuously claim to want)

#this is about doctor who series 4 episode 13 journey's end #pain #pure pain #i honestly emotionally can't handle the (old now they're) tennant specials right now #I'm emotions I'm #ow ouchie ow #btw i want you to know #this is the first ten series end that doesn't end with a silly little cliffhanger that intercuts an otherwise emotional scene #and that should mean something to you #which is ouchie ouch ow

10 notes · View notes

kerryweaverlesbian · 4 months

Text

2023, cawis created...

Last year I made a post (which I cannot find) delighted to have published 81,932 words to Ao3 over 20 fics. This year I beat that with 111,227! 25 fics new last year! and that's not including poetry or things I only posted to tumblr! How wonderful!! I'm gonna do a little commentary on each of them (and I will thoughtfully put it below the cut because as I said there are 25. There is a "horny" section with some explicit quotes so just scroll past to the next heading if you don't want to see that lol.

Comedies I like to go hehehe hahaha

Stakes Aren't Just For Vampires Cas and Dean get high and silly "You're repulsive," Dean says by rote, and he isn't sure if he meant it to but it comes out cloying and sweet, like an affectionate nickname.

The first one I posted last year! It took me until March :0 I wrote this one. For maybe a slightly mean reason haha. I saw a fic where Cas did a bet for money and I was like ?? why would CAS care about getting money?? So I tried to think of a situation where he would make a bet and this one materialized!

Did you notice! I used the old reliable Rule Of Three to make the ending of Dean not sure if he said "I love you" or just thought it more potent? He thinks and then immediately says what he's thinking twice before: Cas is perfect/"You're perfect" - Dean wants to kiss him/"I want to kiss you" - and then: "I love you Cas," he thinks he says. I chose "1000 dollars" from the CBBC comedy sketch show Stupid sketch where 2 old ladies ask how much something costs and it's a normal amount and they mishear as "A thousand pounds?! You can't expect me to buy a bun for a thousand pounds. Shame on you!! I am taking my business ELSEWHERE!". The comments won't all be this long lmao (<- edit: she's wrong)

I'll Drink To That Sam and Dean both come out as bisexual at the same time late in life and they're both flabbergasted "What, do you think about how every friend we have would be in bed?" Dean tips his head to the ceiling thoughtfully and Sam wants to melt into the floor. "You're horrible. I hate you. I hate spending time with you."

The SECOND one I posted last year!! I had to cut off a joke where it's suggested that Cas may have had sex with Jesus Christ (but it's very possible he's just messing with Dean) for the sake of flow. First fic I chatted with @homoangel about so I always think of him when I think of this fic <3

I'VE CRAWLED FURTHER INTO THE VCR Cas's dream of being vored by the VCR machine is finally realised Intricate, high effort collaboration, all for the relatively unimportant end of entertaining other humans for somewhere around an hour and a half. The entire enterprise amounts to making pleasing shapes and noises for each other. Fruitless. Pointless...To spend months, years even, producing something, the only purpose of which is to waste more time…the decadence was astounding. [horny]

Speaking of fics that make me think of my friends! Wrote this for dear @castielsprostate's 1k event. Get weird get wild!! He is THE teevee angel and I love him I love him I love him for it!!!!!!

Tragedies Auogh ouch ow ouchies. Hehe <3

The Aftermath Dean and Cas have sex. It was great. Dean can't let it happen again. "He wonders - and he shouldn't, but - he wonders if Cas will sit here again, later, feeling out the absences that Dean is going to leave behind."

The THIRD one I posted this year!!! I went directly from silly silly silly to "[Dean] is a practical man, always has been. If there's something behind you that would kill you to look at it, you just don't look at it.". I think this is one of my best (<- guy who is going to say this about most of her fics sajbfhsv. I wouldn't post them if I wasn't proud of them!!)

Time/Body Problem Cas and Dean make out in the car before Cas's date in Heaven Can't Wait. It doesn't change anything. he's all sensation now, mind-body-time melted together like carved figures on a wax candle.

I wrote this and Aftermath on the same day. I was THINKING about how Dean and Cas so so so often ALMOST have it. Dean, here, is enthralled by the idea that Cas is human now and could want him (although, Cas definitely also wants him as an angel lmao but this is what Dean thinks) but also put off by it. When they kiss, he sees Cas as angelic, with a streetlamp halo, able to melt time, but when Cas is walking away from him, he's just some human guy who, crucially, can't save Dean anymore. Cas had reliably been the guy who could blast into any dangerous situation and come out on top (hot) and while that's not the only thing Dean likes about him, it WAS such a relief for scaredboy dangerlife Dean to have a guy who makes things SAFE. And now he can't. So the risk of making their relationship deeper feels even greater. Perhaps it is a selfish thought for Dean to want Cas to be able to rescue him still, but they're both in such perilous positions. He's worried for Cas too.

Oh did yous get the title by the way? It's like the mind/body problem which is, 'is the mind separate from the body or are they completely inextricable'? 'If I think of something sad and start crying while I'm hormonal, is that feeling from by body or from my mind' is how I understand it, but I'm not a philosopher haha. So time/body problem is like, all three of: Does their relationship need human senses and physical touch in order to be meaningful? Does Castiel's new experience of linear time (aka not being an angel) change how he and Dean relate to each other? And also, the more straightforward, they don't have enough time. Not to say I thought all that when the phrase came into my head, it's just bc I knew the phrase mind/body problem and mind slant rhymes with time, but that's why I liked it enough to use as a title haha.

Smoke Breaks series Dean and Cas share cigarettes at different points in their lives. Cas trails off, taking another long pull. He's going to smoke the whole thing at this rate, rude and overindulgent. Dean doesn't begrudge him, neither the cigarette nor the silence. He knows what he means.

Someone told me in the comments that reading the first one fit exactly into their actual smoke break I was like WOAH :0!!! Smoking is, unfortunately, really sexy.......I keep trying to think of a way to add another fic to make this thing end on a positive note but the theme of smoking thwarts that haha. Inherently, it is about doing something you know is unhealthy and grey and makes you feel worse, like hunting, like endverse Cas's relationship with endverse Dean, like coming back to see the lover you hurt when you can't touch them or change anything, but it's always bitter sweet because you sometimes get that burst of relief. (That's not a commentary on smokers, just on the theme of smoking as used by this series!)

The last one I think drives that home most bluntly, "No amount of talking is going to change anything." but they still hold on to each other. Also in the last one, I just wanted them to be in kind of miserable surroundings and decided on a weird, dank, alice in wonderland themed motel room, which is a) something interesting to describe when I need space between dialogue and b) the ill-advised freaky looking murals of half-humanoid Wonderland characters is a reflection of how Castiel feels - not human enough, not Other enough, twisted out of shape and c) it 'reflects' (I'm about to do a pun) their relationship has gone 'through the looking glass' (teehee) from the understood 'brothers in arms' to a strange, uncertain place where the rules have changed.

Shaking Out The Nest John gets frustrated by Dean asking to visit Sam at college. "I talk a lot of shit, but [Sam]'s always gonna be family. He's..." the only reason I'm alive, same as you, John can't quite get to come out of his mouth, so instead he repeats, "He's good."

In the demon plane episode where it's revealed that John would rave about Sam getting a full scholarship to Stanford. I think about it SO MUCH. John loved his kids but that didn't make him a suitable parent. I wanted to explore those complicated emotions and the thought patterns that might lead him to what he does. Like I don't think it's deliberately thought out scheming malice that makes him say things that make Dean feel worthless. But he only sees him as a kid when he "fails" at being an "adult" (as in, when Dean disagrees with him) and he thinks it's his job as a parent to tell Dean to knock that off. He wouldn't see his reframing of Sam leaving to "He left both of us because of his pettiness" as playing them off against each other, even though he IS, he'd see it as telling the hard truth and trusting his son to be a grown up about it. John is very emotional and parenting just via your own emotions rather than being able to step back and go 'am I being fair? is this a reasonable response to what's actually happening?' leads to situations like John blaming Dean for the Schtriga incident or saying he should 'rot in jail' for stealing peanut butter.

Horny ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Close Zoom (too close) Dean and Cas make out for the first time while watching a movie. Cas gets overexcited. [Cas] replays the experience of holding Dean; the way his eyelids had fluttered shut with relief when their mouths first connected; the lean in by increments that ended with Dean on top of him....He wants to touch him. No, he amends the oft repeated thought, he wants to touch him again.

I also wrote this inspired by going huh??? from another fic where they watch a movie together on a date on a first date and DON'T make out like. What are we doing here gang. If they are "watching a movie" and enjoy making out, then they ARE making out before the credits roll lmao. (In MY humble opinion!!!) Obviously chose The Mummy bc Dean's bisexual and I KNOW that man is showing Cas all his Formative To My Sexuality movies as a move to try and suss out what Cas's preferences are. The Lost Boys, Mr & Mrs Smith, Van Helsing, Labyrinth, Indiana Jones, Charlie's Angels, the list goes on.... Also my first installment with Cas having a bit of a pain kink (excited by the thought of a shock collar lol which I havvve been thinking about doing something more with.)

I have. by the way. a second work in progress where Cas gets wayyy more worked up than he was expecting and Dean is similar to here, slowing him down so it's not overwhelming, so look forward to it!!!!

Thunderstruck Cas has them struck by lightening while Dean sucks him off. HELL YEAH. Emanating from Castiel are intermittent bursts of white electric light, shocking across the black sky, sketching outlines of six invisible spread wings. That same light forms thin circular halos behind Cas’s head, some small, some so massive Dean can only see them in pieces. His eyes too - completely obscured by brilliant white light. He is radiant in all senses of the word.

hehehehe. If your boyfriend can make it safe to be struck by lightening like you GOTTA do it just for the experience. I decided to have Dean not be like, blown away by it (but he is blown away by seeing a bit of trueform Cas) and instead find it just kind of weird but not bad to try and be true to life. sometimes you try something and don't love it or hate it and that's okay! Normal part of having sex. Sex is just another activity with lots of things you can do with it. That, and, it can't all be high points lol. That's why Cas is a little subdued when Dean says he only has 6 wings. peaks and valleys :)

The Feeling Is Enough Service top Dean :) "Cas - Cas, please...please can I come?" Cas doesn't say anything, just smiles up at him adoringly.

This one was bc @faithdeans lamented the lack of service top Dean destiel and I raced to his aid. Literally Dean would LOVE doing this.

Red Velvet Lines The Black Box Vampire!Dean sucking Cas's blood :) Cas is the only angel human enough to have workable blood.... And even if there were anyone else, Dean wouldn't want them. His is the only blood in Dean's veins.

This one was bc @domesticatedangel lamented the lack of vampire destiel smut and I raced to her aid. Castiel the rebel angel being horny over being given an order that he chooses to follow of his own volition? It's more likely than you think! The unmissable return of Castiel's pain kink lmao, even moreso in the second chapter. His penis! in peril!!!!!

The Girl Is Dead. Long Live The Woman. (Anna/Pamela*) Anna visits Pamela to find out what she wants and they have sex :) "I'm not used to - being part of things still. Being touchable. I didn't make the most of it, as a human. I didn't do enough. I was afraid. Embarrassed of my own feeling. I think I wasted my life." "Be fair. You were a kid for most of it. You didn't know who you were."

THIS one was because @honestlyhaunted lamented the lack of Pamela/Anna smut and I RACED to their aid. You may be noticing a theme. It's quite possible that if you sigh forlornly over a lack of erotica and I see it that something will be done about it. No promises though lol.

I tried to go for a more season 4 and 5 "everyone just fully states their unique moral philosophy out loud" vibe. And a "Pamela's disability actually affects her life in a practical way" vibe that the show itself elected to ignore. I DID get distracted a few times from my goal of "they have hot sex" because I got too invested in Anna's weird life. As I said in a comment response, Anna is the butterfly that wants to squash herself back into her cocoon. She went from being very emotionally present in her body as a human to having a very flat affect as an angel again (in part because she didn't feel the need to mask her autism anymore. Anna's autistic just like Cas and Hannah and people are not saying this!!!!). And, finally. I wanted a woman to have sex with a woman using a strap on because I hadn't done that yet LOL.

*If this ship was more prominent we could be calling it Pamelanna which is very fun to say.

The Dog, the Lamb and the Butcher Dean and Crowley are having sex during their summer of love and Cas is caught watching them >:3 Then again, fairness doesn't seem to be the watchword here. Dean's looking up at him with what could be adoration, but there's a wildness to him too, a sparkling mischief that undercuts any implied promise of loyalty. "You like me, don't you Cas? You like me. Uhhn -" A groan born out of Crowley picking up the pace again, making Dean rock into the mattress, "You like me. You like me all the time, no matter what I do. You even like me now."

Nobody asked for this I have no one to blame but myself. I love and adore the Dean who cannot speak his feelings no matter how much he wants to but there is always room in my heart for an overemotional Demon!Dean who says and does whatever he wants because he's lost the ability to care about the consequences. We could have had it alllllll.

Ask for it Cas caught casturbating by Dean. What happens next WON'T surprise you. His breathing is labored, and he's making quiet sounds of effort, which probably have something to do with the fact that his fingers are pushing in and out of the wet, open pussy between his legs. The pace doesn't slow at Dean's interruption, giving Dean ample time to absorb the image of Cas’s long fingers being swallowed to the last knuckle.

I am asking here now. I am the one sighing forlornly. I don't CARE that there are already 232 accidental voyeurism destiel fics. MAKE MORE. SHOW ME MORE. SHOW ME MORE. I WANT TO READ MORE. MORE SHAMELESSLY SELF-PLEASURING CASTIEL AND/OR DEAN AND THEY DON'T HAVE A SOCIAL SCRIPT FOR THIS SITUATION SO THEY'RE JUST GOING ON INSTINCT AND THEIR INSTINCT IS TO BE CRAZY HORNY ABOUT IT. SHOW ME MORE!!!!!

Ahem. Or don't teehee. This was my most self indulgent smut (and that's really saying something!!!!). I highly recommend just fuckin going for it because it means I get to reread something all the time that is exactly suited to my tastes!! Hell yeah!!

Fluff :3 this is uwu-hat uwu've aww been uwu-ating fow :3

Pretty Wife Closeted to even himself genderqueer Dean inadvertently insists that he's Cas's wife. Neither of them are opposed! "I think I understand," Cas says, nodding to himself with his 'I got it' smile, "Yes. We are playing roles. I will 'take out the trash' while you 'sit there and look pretty'."

My kingdom for genderqueer dean. He's literally butch. Helloooo!!

Okay that's all for fluff. LOL. SORRY. I post most of my fluff directly to tumblr!!

Carefully Plotted!!! These are the big ones!!!!!!!! All three of these are "One of my best".

A Light Above Descending Cas gives Dean his Grace to calm his Mark of Cain rages. He assumes Dean doesn't remember what he tells him when he's being fed, so he allows himself to be kind. He assumes Dean would prefer that he quietly sacrifice his life for him. He assumes that he hasn't got any family left who love him. He's wrong. A rat gets what a rat gets, is the phrase that repeats in his head, although he can’t speak them over the pounding of his heart, a rat gets what a rat gets.

I have talked about this one at great length in my #cawis commentary tag so I will not reiterate here. Other than that I am sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo so so so so proud of it and I love it so much.

The Voice In My Earpiece Thinks You're An Idiot (Jo/Bela) JoBela heist fic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“If anyone touches you again, I will cut off their fingers.” The fierce darkness of the promise plunges into Bela’s stomach, like a punch. Nobody has ever made her a promise like that before. Not one she believed, anyway. “Do you believe me?” “That would -” Bela clears her throat, finding her voice croaky - “That would blow our cover.” “I don’t care.” She means it. Bela remembers what Jo said when they properly introduced themselves - “I make a promise, I keep it.”. Stupid, it is, to throw away their plans over a few moments of discomfort. Ridiculous. Childish. “Do you believe me?” Jo repeats, and Bela nods, jerky, unpracticed. “Yes.” She takes a breath, then says again, “Yes.”

They get the biggest quote because theyyy mean so much to meeeee. I'll probably do another cawis commentary on this at some point bc there are too many things I did on purpose to say them all here. For now: when the woman who's learned to never trust anyone comes to trust the woman who's never felt trusted. And they banter and have hot lesbian sex. ROMANCE.

In Case of Emergency S1 Faith!Dean gets a new roommate at the hospital who's weird and intense and unexplainable things happen to him at night. I wonder who it could beeeee surely no one who's significant to Dean!!! (It's S5 Cas when he did the angel banishing sigil on his own chest) One of the machines on the other side starts going crazy with noise just as the curtain is cast back in a dramatic swish. The shadow of a man looms, sinister and ominously silent. He's watching Dean, but Dean can't do the same, his face impossible to make out. A red light flashes off kilter to his head from his monitors, and Dean gets the absurd thought that it looks like a knocked off halo.

You know it you love it it's In Case Of Emergency. I just think. They DON'T have a supernatural soulmate connection but they just get on as people. If they met at any time in each other's lives for the very first time (aside from Godstiel lol) they would end up getting along! They click! They LIKE each other!

I thought a lot about the Sam role in this fic. If you have 3 people and 2 of them want something (to hang out all the time) then the 3rd person SHOULD be getting in the way of that (closing the curtain) for a believable reason (Dean needs to rest and stop tiring himself out with this random stranger!!!). Sam comparing Dean's imminent demise to Mary's death and Dean eventually asking what he'd want Mary to say to him (with the subtext; what can I say to make it better that I'm dying) made me cry as I wrote it and every time I reread it. It's making me cry NOW lol. augh fuck im rereading i'm crying. turns out. when you write exactly what touches you emotionally. you feel touched. emotionally. to read it.

Also this fic now makes me think of darling @forestofsprites bc they've left such wonderfully kind tags every time they've reblogged it :') ily

Misc I dunno. These don't fit in the other categories lol.

6th Life's The Charm! Sarah Blake/Bela Meow!!!!! Sarah gets a mysterious commission to find a painting, and a strangely perceptive cat follows her home the same day. But those can't possibly be connected I'm sure. Smiling with her eyes closed, Sarah puts a hand on B's back and touches. Skin. She startles awake and jerks her hand away. By the embers of the fire, she can see the woman lying on top of her....The woman is watching her, smiling, and her pupils are strange. They creep a little too far into her irises. She's also the most beautiful woman Sarah has ever seen. Stunning, in both senses of the word. "No questions?" The woman asks eventually, as Sarah's silent stare ticks on. Her tone is a) British and b) faintly mocking, like she knows something Sarah doesn't.

Little turned into a kitty cat romcom!! I do fun little asides in footnote format! Middle aged yaoi ummmm but what about middle aged YURI??? Sarah references Sex in the City and is having a midlife crisis what more do you want from me!!! I did want to have a little moment of Sarah saying "sorry about the collar attempt" and Bela flirtily going "hmm, I think it'd look better on you" and Sarah spontaneously combusting but it didn't quite flow. Maybe in the horny sequel I kinda want to write...

MEOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hello, Sun In My Face Cas realises he's in love with Dean. The natural thing to do is to tell him right away. "Don't," Dean pleads, and it's not clear whether he means don't love me or don't tell me. Either way, Cas is going to let him down. "I love you," Cas repeats, firmly, "I have loved you. I will love you. That's all."

Too angsty for the fluff section, too sweet for the tragedies. What are you. As may be clear from previous works, in MY world, Dean and Cas platonically sleep together every night and snuggle the whole time :3 even if it's a world where they're aromantic I firmly believe this would be the case. When I say platonic I am not saying it with a wink and a nudge, as a few scattered comments seem to suggest they think. But also in this one they are also romantically in love haha.

How Do You Go From Wanting To Having? When Cas stumbles back to life after escaping from the Empty, Dean can't speak the words in his heart. But he can write them. You can have it, and variations thereupon: You can have it, damn it; could have fucking taken me, asshole; what do you think is supposed to make me happy now, you arrogant, stupid son of a bitch?

I don't know if I made the most of this premise lol but I had fun building the evidence of grief into the Bunker. They pushed a heavy object in front of the door to the dungeon so they didn't have to see it, Dean filled his room with lights so he didn't have to be in the dark (a general post-canon headcanon of mine that both Dean and Cas have lamps on all night), Dean's stiff position during his nightmare. Little clues that Cas does NOT pick up on bless his heart.

This Is A Love That Lasts Forever It's about Claire giving Cas a haircut. It's about grief. It's about love. Cas remembers - though he shouldn't, ethically - sending Claire for a time out for saying the word 'damn' when she was 6, though she surely couldn't have known what it meant. Swinging her hand on the way to church on Sundays. Clapping for her awkward turn at playing Mary in the Christmas Nativity. Loving Claire had only deepened Jimmy's love of God, and this was the love that Castiel had taken advantage of. He doesn't deserve even a moment of Claire’s forgiveness.

Last one! I uploaded this on the 29th of December but it ISSSSSS absolutely 1000% one of my best. Cas and Claire's relationship in canon is so WEIRD. One doesn't typically accept grumpy cats from the guy wearing your dad's corpse as a skin suit??? Even if he's kind of nice to you?? So this is my way of figuring out how to make it make sense. She can't ditch Cas because that's where all her dad's love is stored and nobody else in her life knows her dad anymore. And they both have to try and make that work.

I had a different ending in mind for a little while - Claire completing the haircut and then going oh my god. now you don't look like my dad anymore. what have I done now I won't remember him I'm so stupid!!! put it back how it was!! and Cas is like um I can't do that though I'm low on Grace and Claire cries herself out about it and they talk about having to get used to new, unfamiliar circumstances. But I like what I went with more (obviously. because I wrote it lol).

Little headcanons that I carried across from other works: - Claire will allow Donna to be as cutesy and affectionate as she likes and Donna calls her "Claire-bear" and nobody can figure out why it's a shy little happy smile when Donna pats her cheek and beams at her and she would kill anyone else who tried it with her laser eyes. I do though, I know why. It's bc of Donna's easy open affection that genuinely isn't trying to hide anything. Claire knows Donna isn't faking it because Donna is kind to everything and everyone. She would have a harder time with Garth though even though Donna and Garth are very similar in this regard, just because. Well. The girl has been traumatized and betrayed by so many "nice" men. God how did I get onto this. Donna is the mom/aunty figure Claire has needed for a long time. I talk about this in Growing A New Half Soul - Angel's were never children I talk about in A Light Above Descending.

THE END.

If you've read this. Are you sure you didn't have anything better to do with your time avhsbv but thank you!!! Go follow all the friends I've @'d because then they might do follower events and I might write more things as a result!!!! Also go and write some dean walking in on cas masturbating fic and then send it to me.

My challenge for you is to think about women falling in love with other women. Wow, beautiful, right? And also to think of ONE thing you did that you are proud of this year. Even and in fact especially if it's something you're not "supposed" to be proud of. Did you find something new you liked. Were you kind to someone. Were you kind to yourself when you didn't have to be. All these and more are things to take pride in.

I, for one, am proud of having written 111,227 words of complete short fiction!!!!! So much so that I wrote another 4936 words talking about them here :)

#cawis commentary #fic recs #this post is actually really just for me to reflect on my own work and remember all the fun stuff I put in there #and this number also isn't including my many many many WIPs teehee #anyway. MWAH!!!!!

7 notes · View notes

charliespringverse · 9 months

Text

iwbft — wednesday: a brief summary of my annotations

all highlighted quotes: 89

· ouch/ow/owie: 7

· real/felt/relatable/so true: 4

· aroace: 1

· ☹/☹☹/☹☹☹: 4

I didn't find anything, but that doesn't mean nothing was there. — rpf shippers looking for proof

What's the point in being in The Ark if we're going to get stalked, harassed, have photographs leaked, privacy stolen, and never, ever be at peace? — read peace (part 3 in the folklore trilogy) by @ treacherousdoctors on ao3 xxx

I showed her the picture of Jimmy as my lock screen. I talked to her about Jowan. She probably thinks I'm absolute fandom trash. — UR GETTING THERE QUEEN KEEP GOING

You're not just doing this to try to meet The Ark, right?? Because you won't meet them. — foreshadowing innit

[...] the three boys who have kept me alive for the past four years. — this whole thing RLLY fucks w my head like . am i too autistic to fathom the idea of strangers being solely responsible for ur life & wellbeing or is it Weird

The fans gave us everything we have. I love them. I love the fans. — who are you trying to convince jimothy

Lister... I don't remember what Lister did. — HHHHHHHH 𖨆𖨆 𖨆 AGAIN

I look down and realise there's blood splattered all down my pyjama shorts and on my legs. I laugh. Why've I got blood all over me? What the fuck. — depersonalisation (note: this is double underlined)

The blood falls, with a soft 'plip', onto the table. Almost indiscernible from the rain falling outside. — pathetic fallacy babeyyy

'I miss home,' I say. He looks confused. 'We are home?' 'No, we're not,' I say. — AGONY

Part of me knows it's what God wants. It's the good thing, and the right thing, to help someone in a horrible situation. But another part of me knows that this is because of The Ark. Because I fucking live to serve them too. — mmmmmm

'I think we're your only dating options.' 'Rowan's straight.' 'Oh. Just me, then.' I whack him on the arm and we both laugh. — ☹ he means it

We don't ever talk about deep stuff, me and Lister Bird. — TRY (note: this is all caps, huge, and double underlined)

He was voted number one in this year's Glamour's 100 Sexiest & Hottest Men, MTV's 50 Sexiest Men Alive, and HerInterest's 100 Hottest Men in the World, all of which it was finally acceptable for him to qualify for, since he's over eighteen now. — creepy!

'Why else would anyone want to be around me?' he says. 'I'm Lister Bird. Why else would anyone want to be around me other than to get with me?' — ouchie mr bird !!!!!

Bliss raises her eyebrows at him. 'Is the word you're looking for "gay"? It ain't poisonous. — bliss laicon

#iwbftreread #i'm in early this time!

19 notes · View notes

i-can-even-burn-salad · 1 year

Note

Happy birthday!!!

I can´t even.

Kate, I love you.

Transcript below the cut, and I love you for that, too 🥹

Image 1:

Cedric’s New Globe. A BAD STICK FIGURE book by Little Peril Stories based on Nuisance by i-can-even-burn-salad

Image 2:

The text reads: Merridy and Cedric were good friends. One day, Merridy decided to do something nice for Cedric. A brown, wooden sign with a nail in each corner reads Cedric’s Fabulous Antiques. Next to it are two stick figures, one with a brown ponytail (Merridy) and one with blond hair, a beard, and a cane (Cedric).

Image 3:

The text reads: ‘I know!’ she thought. ‘I’ll get him a lovely gift.’ She decided to get him a pretty crystal globe. In the image, stick-figure Merridy holds a beige satchel. A blue thought bubble over her head contains a lightbulb. A black dotted-line arrow points to a globe surrounded by purple arrows. A yellow, jagged bubble contains the words A CRYSTAL GLOBE!

Image 4:

The text reads: Getting the globe was hard work. Merridy had to be VERY stealthy and VERY quiet. Stick-figure Merridy, from the bottom of the page, looks up at a house with a blue thought bubble that reads, Huh. The house is brown with a red door, a brown chimney, and a brick turret. It is behind a barbed wire fence. Next to the house floats a globe. Next to it is a price tag that reads, RETAIL PRICE: HECKIN’ EXPENSIVE. A dotted-line arrow connects the price tag to the globe. Another arrow connects the globe to the house, with a label that reads in here. A third dotted line pointing at the fence reads, yes, that’s barbed wire.

Image 5:

The text reads, Her hard work paid off. She got the globe! Bringing it back to Cedric was not easy, though. Stick-figure Merridy holds the beige satchel and the globe. A dotted-line arrow connected the globe to the satchel is labelled with the word, yoink! A blue thought bubble above stick figure Merridy’s head reads, SUCCESS! A box at the bottom of the page reads, THE G.O.A.T. It is connected to the stick figure with a dotted line arrow.

Image 6:

The text reads, She met a guard dog. She climbed a barbed wire fence. Below the first sentence, stick-figure Merridy runs holding her satchel, which is drawn horizontally and followed by straight lines to indicate speed and movement. A blue thought bubble above her head reads, Dang it dang it DANG IT! Below stick-figure Merridy is a grey stick-figure dog. A speech bubble over the dog’s head reads, Woof! Above the second sentence, stick figure Merridy, still holding the beige satchel, is drawn upside down with her legs over head to indicate that she is vaulting over the barbed wire fence. A blue thought bubble over her head reads, This hurts. Like, a lot. A dotted-line arrow pointing to the fence reads, very sharp. Stick-figure Merridy is surrounded by words indicating pain: Ouch. Ow. Owie. Omg. Ouchie. Ow. Ow. Owie. Omfg.

Image 7:

The text reads: Cedric was astonished when Merridy brought him his new globe. “Thank you for my gift,” he said. “But I’m just glad you are okay!” In the centre of the page, stick-figure Cedric, holding his cane, faces stick-figure Merridy. The globe, surrounded by purple arrows, is in between them. Stick-figure Cedric has his mouth open in an O shape in surprise. Merry has her arms extended toward Cedric and the globe. A purple thought bubble coming from Cedric’s head contains a bold, black exclamation point, while a purple speech bubble beside Cedric’s head reads, Uuuh… A blue speech bubble next to Merridy’s head reads, I got you something. Behind the Merridy stick figure are 5 bright red teardrop shapes and 6 bright red shoeprints. The red is indicative of blood. On the far right edge of the page is a yellow sign that reads, YEAH IT’S WHAT YOU THINK IT IS. Two dotted-line arrows connect the sign to the blood drops and the bloody shoeprints.

Image 8:

A brown, wooden sign with nails in all four corners reads, the end.

#salad-ask #writingkate #salad-find #I don´t have a keyboard rn so I'm gonna tag this later

8 notes · View notes

yay-depression · 5 years

Text

Me @ Walgreens last week looking at braces: “I’ve never had wrist problems before, I don’t need a wrist stabilizer.”

Me now in pain and regret: stupid painless last week me

#im in pain #wrist stabilizer #help me #ow #ouch ouch ouch #oof ouch #ouchie #brace #stupid me #im stupid #hsd #joint pain #joint problems #lets play... which disability is causing pain today

1 note · View note

mcyt-kalopsia · 3 years

Text

I’m Not Who You Know - Ouchie Fuck Ow Revivebur

Request: I am once again making formal request: Revivedbur, finding Friend and not knowing why Friend is so clingy with him, and attempts to get Friend to leave him alone. Give me more pain please

A/N: ouchie, I hate it! Thanks!

Theme: Ouchie fucking angst ouch fuck ouchie ow this hurts OW

Warnings: angst. MURDER. ummmmm also strong language? Lots of it.

Characters: Friend my bestie Friend the sheep ;w;, Revivebur, c!Tommy *sobs*, Y/N

His day had already started off relatively bad, but the added nuisance of this damned blue sheep that had been following him since the day he’d gotten back didn’t help any.

The constant bleating, and nudging against him, and laying near him was enough to almost drive him crazy a second time. Maybe third, if he counted limbo, but he wouldn’t Didn’t even wanna think about it.

As Revivebur tried his best to get through his day, Friend became more and more infuriating. Didn’t this thing have better things to do, like... eat grass, or whatever? He tried to bribe him with wheat, which he ate but didn’t take a hint from. He lightly kicked him, which made him run around a little before coming right back. He even tried just shooing him. Nothing was working. It was simply too much for him to handle.

“Could you fuck off?” He turned to the sheep, who just stared back in response. Obviously. Sheep can’t talk.

“Hey,” Y/N mumbled, “be nice.”

“This thing is so fucking annoying. Why the fuck does it like me so much? And WHY is it’s name Friend? That’s so stupid. If I were named Friend, I would simply ki-”

“Enough,” Y/N interrupted. They didn’t have the heart to tell Revivebur that this was Ghostbur’s sheep, because if he heard that, he’d probably kill Friend on the spot.

“Oi, dickhead! Heard you talking bad about Friend!” Tommy glared at Revivebur as he made his way over, kneeling down and running his hands through the brightly-coloured wool. “This is the only thing we have left of Ghostbur.”

Well, I guess Tommy did it for Y/N. This was gonna be bad.

“Ghostbur...?” His jaw clenched, but Tommy was too busy to notice as he pet the sheep, who bleated happily in response. “What is it with you guys and that stupid ghost..? He’s gone.” Y/N went to step in between Revivebur and the other two.

“Tommy, look out!”

Revivebur was quick to cut Y/N’s attempt down, by pushing them to the ground. Y/N wouldn’t be able to be quick enough to try again.

“Sorry, love. But this fucking stupid blue sheep is pissing me off.”

It didn’t take long for that lovely blue to be stained red, and for Tommy to be holding the last remaining thing they had of Ghostbur. Revivebur tucked his knife back into his pocket, kicking Friend lightly with the toe of his boot to make sure he was dead.

Tommy shook violently with a mix of rage, intense sadness, and also a little bit of fear. “You... you...” He was breathing hard. He was in no state to speak. “I’ll kill you. My god. Someday, it’s going to be me that kills you. I promise you that.”

Revivebur shrugged, then turned to his lover. “You coming, Y/N? I’d assume you would want to wash up? You’ve got some blood on your face.”

Y/N heavily contemplated just leaving him right then and there.

“You go on. I’ll be with you in a moment.”

The older male shrugged again, sticking his hands in his pockets and making his way back home.

“I’m sorry, Tommy. I should have... I should have been quicker.” Y/N wiped some blood off of their cheek and looked down at the sheep, whose wool had slowly become a dark purple in some areas. They were hit with the harsh reality that Revivebur wasn’t the same person as Wilbur. He was cold. Quick to anger. He wasn’t the same, and never would be.

“It’s... it’s okay. You couldn’t have known, Y/N. I don’t blame you. I blame him.”

But... they could have known.

They did know.

Why did they let him do this? Was there something wrong with Y/N too? Was Revivebur’s influence that strong...?

#revivebur x reader #revivebur x you #revivebur x y/n #dsmp x y/n #dsmp x you #dsmp x reader #tommyinnit writing #platonic tommy x reader #dsmp friend #friend the sheep

69 notes · View notes

leo-frognag · 3 years

Text

ok so today we’re discussing “elphaba’s dance” because OUCH

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-bmEVsg51_Q (link to the song!! it’s so good!! i love it so much!!) AND https://vdocuments.mx/wicked-the-musical-complete-score.html (link to the score, it’s on page 193 if you want to look at it)

first off, listening to it and knowing what eventually happens to elphaba and galinda’s relationship HURTS like a BITCH, but i digress.

So, orchestration. “Slowly; freely” is the direction when it starts, on the cue after Galinda mimics Elphaba’s... sweet moves, let’s just call ‘em that. This doesn’t have any significance, I just like its vibes. The keyboard that comes in here (even though it doesn’t sound like a keyboard b/c ~aesthetics~) is really just to make the eventual incorporation of the Dancing Through Life theme sound more natural, nothing huge there.

BUT when the actual song starts is where I start to feel sad because I’ve been looking through the score pretty extensively and I’ve found that our main characters have certain instrumental associations. For the sake of this post, Elphaba’s is an (electric) guitar, sometimes replicated on the keyboard. Check out about 1:30 on the cast recording of Defying Gravity for my favorite instance of it cropping up. Galinda’s is less clear-cut but I’m pretty sure it’s a flute (hard to tell b/c she sings with the ensemble a lot, and those moments are way more fully-orchestrated than Elphaba’s numerous, relatively sparse solo moments).

So Elphaba’s Dance begins with Galinda’s flute sounding the “Unlimited” motif also known as The First 4 Notes of Somewhere Over the Rainbow But With A Different Rhythm and Elphaba’s guitar accompanying her on the last 3 notes of that, the syllables of which correspond to “limited.” Ow.

I do want to linger on the fact that Galinda is the only one dancing at that moment. This comes AFTER the public humiliation, and this instance of their instruments combining so quickly and effortlessly signals (at least in my opinion) the exact moment where Galinda really begins to understand Elphaba’s perspective. I’ve dubbed this “the bonding moment.”

This repeats 3 times before "Unlimited” transitions into the woodwinds and the guitar/flute combo takes up the Dancing Through Life motif instead, and the music speeds up as our favorite witches begin to dance together. An amusing note in the score suggests that the bassist “get [their] Jaco on,” referencing legendary Weather Report bassist Jaco Pastorius.

The rest of the song is a pretty snazzy mishmash of the “unlimited” and “dancing through life” themes, but there is a point (around 1:10 in the video) where the flute CONTINUES ONTO THE SECOND BAR OF THE UNLIMITED MOTIF (ya know, where it goes up a little higher like in Wizard and I, Defying Gravity, etc.), in an excruciatingly painful bit of foreshadowing! They’re speaking each other’s (musical) words!!! [insert scene from Firebringer where Jemilla touches the spear and just goes “ouchie”]

Beginning around 1:18, there’s a small reference to What Is This Feeling (but a lot less angry). Specifically, the brass at 1:21 that plays the EXACT same notes as “whole life,” as well as the chord that resolves at 1:26 completes the line, sounding on the same note as “long” (so “whole life long” has been successfully inserted). This same sequence of notes (“whole life long”) is repeated at the VERY end, in the scene transition between the Ozdust and Popular. THIS TIME, IT’S ARRANGED IN THE EXACT SAME HARMONY AS “WHAT IS THIS FEELING,” WITH THE FLUTE PLAYING GALINDA’S VOCAL LINE AND THE GUITAR PLAYING ELPHABA’S. THIS MAKES ME FEEL MANY EMOTIONS.

So! yeah uhhh Elphaba’s Dance is the backing track to the idk... 4th-gayest scene? in the whole show and I completely adore all ~2 minutes of it.

Anyways uhh if you read this whole thing? I love you so much have a FANTASTIC day <3333 and PLEASE don’t be afraid to like. send me asks about any more motivic stuff you may’ve noticed because that’s my JAM.

#wicked #leo speaks #adhd rant #gelphie #because of course it is #i'm not brave enough to tag this as music theory #but hehe music make brain go brrrrr

68 notes · View notes

smilingspinel · 5 years

Note

angst anon comin in HOT... how would a breakup between reader and spinel go? (get back together in the end of course but what about that initial pain ohoho)

oof ouch ouchie ow

In the heat of the moment, Spinel’s form poofs. It doesn’t matter which of you broke it off, but the emotion is just too much for her to handle.

If her tear streaks had disappeared or faded over the course of your relationship, they probably return in some way when she reforms.

She’s not angry with you, like she was with Pink, so her hair is less spiked in anger and more drooped down in sadness.

She so desperately still wants to be your friend after the breakup, which definitely results in her following you around, even when you didn’t ask her if she wanted to come in the first place.

She still loves you with everything she has, so she holds onto the keepsakes you gave her during your relationship. She could never throw them away or sell them because she believes that would make her “just as bad as Pink”

She vents about the breakup to Steven multiple times a week, blaming some different but equally tiny cause every single time.

She probably buys out the Big Donut’s entire stock multiple times. She learned about “stress eating” from Amethyst, and follows pretty closely in her footsteps when it comes to the amount of food she eats in total.

If she never usually sleeps anyway, why is she so exhausted? why now?

The more time you spend apart from her, the more you realize you miss her. The more you hear she’s talking to Steven, the more you regret what happened. You reach out for her hand when it’s not there, listen for the sound of her voice, go places you used to go on dates, and it’s the point when you start seeing her in your dreams that you realize you want-

No, you need her back.

You find her moping to Amethyst, stacks upon stacks of empty donut boxes sitting between them.

She notices that you’ve been crying, when you approach her, and she wants to wipe your tears away and ask you what’s wrong, but she hesitates

Until you tell her that you want to talk to her alone.

She follows you back to your place, all the way to your bedroom, where you dump everything, you apologize, you call yourself stupid and awful and all these things for not knowing what you had until it was gone

When it clicks for her that you’re talking about you, she starts breaking down too, and holds you in her arms and hushes you until you stop breathing so heavily; she’s afraid you’re going to pass out.

She’s the one who proposes you get back together and give it another joke, and she probably throws in some sad joke about how it’s probably for the best, since the breakup seemed to tear you two apart more than whatever the original cause of the breakup did in the first place.

You don’t have the energy to leap on her, or anything of the sort, but you tip over onto her, and she slowly wraps an arm around you

It’s the warmest you’ve felt in days, so it’s no wonder you fall asleep like that.

#spinel x reader #my writing #angst

126 notes · View notes

tmitransitioning · 5 years

Note

so it seems that my dr didnt prescribe me the 23g needles for im injections or i didnt get them or something, would 21g hurt a significant amount or is it just like. an ouchie

its pretty large for IM, I'd check with your doc to see if you can get a smaller gauge. I personally use 25g (which makes the injection slower because of the thickness of the T but it’s significantly more comfortable) but i wouldn’t ever recommend anyone using larger than a 23g because it’s just needlessly more painful. There should be a medical justification (like being a significantly overweight bodybuilder- lots of fat and lots of thick bulky muscle) for using a 21g. in absence of that, I would always 100% of the time, medically advise against using a 21g because it’s needlessly painful. I can’t rate for YOU the amount of pain (for some people shots are like “ow” and for others, they’re like “OUCH!” even using the appropriately sized needle, so using too big of a needle would make them varyingly uncomfortable.) but any increase of pain with injections is pointless when we can avoid it. the most basic rule of medicine is “first, do no harm” so get you better needles.

mod mayhem

#injections #needles #shots #Anonymous

11 notes · View notes

letstalksymphogear · 5 years

Text

Symphogear, EP. 5 (Cont.)

Tsubasa ruminates about her current situation in her Symphogear Brand Safety Capsule of Absolute Dunces.

“aight ive done seen the light lemme at that sweet, sweet taco bell”

Meanwhile, some old ass politicians rumble about Relics.

“im old.”

But they immediately get fucked up in a nasty car accident.

As it turns out, the Americans were waiting to intercept these old crones to steal The Goods.

And holy fuck are they are American. Personally, I feel the writers of Symphogear watched Die Hard and immediately went “these people are fucking animals”. That’s just me, though.

“ooh ouch oh mmm ouchie ouch oooo ouch”

They tear into these people with an almost machine like efficiency.

These people don’t fuck around. There’s a strange surreality around it given that this is honestly pretty accurate to how brutal special operatives can be, but the Japanese accent they have in their English voices is... a bit jarring.

“IM BACK FROM THE MALL, YA’LL”

“oh god she’s back”

“ah, ryoko. as per your lingo, quote, ‘i like your new gucci boots... bitch’ was that good? im not fond at cursing at women unless its a mutual training session”

Genjuro alerts that the Minister of Defense for Japan has just been assassinated.

“shits bad”

Conveniently... Ryoko’s phone was broken. In her defense, it’s 2012. Battery life didn’t have the bragging rights it had now for phone.

“i personally use a razer flip phone. those will never go out of style!”

Ryoko manages to show them the box the Americans were trying to get. Suspiciously...

There’s a bloodstain on it.

So the main struggle right now is that the Bad Guys(tm) want to get their hands on Durandal, which is a completed relic that is hidden away miles underneath the school in the 2nd Division Labs.

This musty, old, shitty sword has immense power. Almost Godlike.

“hey why dont we just use the sword to beat up the bad guys”

The sword was handed from the EU to Japan for Japan to safekeep, and in exchange to forgive some of the loans the EU owed Japan should the EU economy collapse.

How topical.

“i read a lot of beserk and honestly im pretty sure someone beats up the bad guys with that dumb sword”

“listen nerd, we’re not doing that dumb weeb anime shit. we’re taking this sword to a vault to the bottom of parliament.”

“thats right. who needs anime when you’ve got nicholas cage.”

And so, they plotted to deliver this dumb sword tomorrow.

Ryoko logs into Runescape.

Fun fact: Fulcanelli is a reference to this dude, who was a French alchemist whose identity nobody really knows. Alchemy is a concept that will come up during GX that has no relevance whatsoever during these first 2 seasons except in some passerby jargon. This as just a cute thing I wanted to point out.

You know, that’s a pretty sexy sword upon closer examination.

“thats the dark souls of swords”

“ah! a fellow gamer! im glad that you too partake of the souls of darkening. would you like to play a two player match somtime, fellow Gamer?”

“I would genuinely rather eat shit for the rest of my life!”

The scene ends. Alright, where are n-

Oh God we’re back to this bullshit. Okay then.

Miku, reasonably, is upset that her wife is gone for several hours for increasingly sketchy reasons. Much like an estranged wife going to see her “tennis instructor” for “private tennis lessons” in the “safety of their house, which has a tennis court”, Miku is worried that Hibiki is a liar liar, pants on fire.

Nose the size of a wire.

Hibiki, feeling the fear of God, quickly bails this increasingly tense situation.

Miku is suffering, and so am I with this hamfisted writing.

“you didnt even try the cookies i made out of frustration for you. i designed them all after me with increasingly angrier faces”

“im too young for a divorce. fuck, those cookies smelled good”

Hibiki decides to not sweat it anymore, opening a magazine and WHOA WHAT THE FUCK

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS I DONT REMEMBER THIS WHEN DID HIBIKI GET HER HANDS ON THIS OH MY GOD

“HELL NO IM MARRIED THE DEVIL CANNOT TEMPT ME”

Hibiki closes it up to reveal the relevant part of this magazine.

This is subtle, but it’s basically a vehicle to explain how things are covered up for Symphogears. Ogawa walks in, talking about how this headline was his doing.

“i wasn’t joking when i said we were literally the NSA”

Hibiki is happy that Tsubasa has been freed from Metaphor Limbo, having escaped the Water Metaphor Dimension back into real life.

“she literally wont stop talking about taco bell and honestly its killing me inside”

“shit ill get her some”

Ogawa does some schpiel about teamwork and asks Hibiki for an idea on what to do with Tsubasas image even though he’s supposed to be the manager and it’s just general prattle.

Everyone gets briefed about the delivery. Ryoko’s soccer mom van sticks out like a sore thumb. Nobody on the Lydian campus asks why there are 5 cars outside the building with men in suits and fucking Hibiki standing there with them why are these children so fucking incurious.

“this feels like the world’s most important weed delivery, but im going to deliver the SHIT out of that weed”

“hibiki please its not weed”

“ALRIGHT FAM LETS DELIVER THE SHIT OUT OF THIS WEED”

Big thick black cars surround Ryoko’s tiny vehicle as they all drive in unison to the drop point.

No fucking around here. The weed must be delivered.

The weed? Secured as shit.

“its not fucking weed it’s a goddamned french sword okay god”

“ROAD’S LOOKIN’ A-OKAY FOR OUR WEEEED DRIIIIIIVE”

PSYCHE, NO IT AINT. ROAD’S CRACKING UP HARD. COMES APART, CAR FUCKING EXPLODES!

“oh my god we seriously arent fucking around here those guys are fucking dead”

“bruh you never delivered weed before? that shit happens all the time”

“anyway grab on to something ‘cause we’re gonna initial d this shit”

youtube

“i thought we were delivering WEED not SUSHI”

“WEED... SUSHI... IT’S ALL FUCKING METAPHORS, HIBIKI. AND WE’RE GONNA DELIVER EM!”

“now ORDER UP, MOTHERFUCKER”

Every car is destroyed.

Ryoko flips the car like nobody’s business.

“ryoko! the kansai drift was too strong!”

“your delivery’s late, pal. that’s gonna have to come out of your tip.”

“jokes on you! you already paid the tip beforehand online!”

“oh, we’re going with pizza jokes now? is that what we’re doing? yeah, sure, whatever”

Unfortunately, Chris ordered her pizza with meat, extra crispy.

“FUCK, i cant see anything. now i don’t know if they have the weed- i mean, the sushi- er, the pizza- god i hate all these JOKES”

RYOKO SUMMONS A FUCKING SHIELD OUTTA NOWHERE WHILE HIBIKI’S KNOCKED OUT COLD

“yo hol’ up a moment did this pervert manage to summon a shield”

“are- are you able to fight the noise? are you fucking kidding me? this entire time when literal children were fighting these battles, you literally could have fought back effectively? are we but mere playthings to you? is this really the bullshit im seeing?”

“uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i can only make shields. piss shields, out of piss”

“that is absolute fucking bullshit”

“but i believe it.”

Hibiki has primed her fists and is about to show how much she’s improved combat wise, which is actually a lot.

Nevermind, she tripped again. Turns out, Symphogears fight in heels constantly, which is absolutely fucking horrifying. Hibiki realizes this, and then

FUCKING BREAKS THE HEELS LIKE NOBODY’S BUSINESS.

AND THEN SHE WRECKS SHOP WITHOUT BREAKING A GODDAMN SWEAT

“oh shit how the fuck did she improve this quickly”

The suitcase where the sword is stored opens up. That means it’s activating.

Immediate fear.

“alright bruce lee you mightve mastered a thousand kicks but you better change your gameplan because im about to realign that pretty little face of yours”

“thank god you kicked me. needed you to get closer so i could kick your ass, after all”

The fucking suitcase, I shit you not, pops open immediately with the sword flipping to the sky like a bad Gmod toy as it suddenly stays floating, perfectly still.

“ive officially lost track on what the hell is happening”

The sword just floats there, as a sword does.

“you know how many fried turkeys i can cut open with that bad boy? that shits mine now.”

Chris goes to get it.

“fuck you! im going to slice HONEYBAKED HAMS with that sword!”

Hibiki intercepts it and takes the sword.

Now Hibiki becomes a proud Stand owner, having acquired the power of The World and stopping time at will.

“oooooh holy shit”

Hibiki, now channeling the power of Durandal, feels the raw strength of a completed relic all through her body.

Real spicy stuff running through her veins.

The power unleashing itself into a raw stream of piss skyrocketing into the stratosphere.

“the pizza has been delivered... all according to plan...”

“...she was right. honeybaked ham was the superior meat to slice...”

Hibiki is channeling a power source so ancient, so powerful, that through using her as a conduit, the sword actually finishes itself into its full, completed form.

Holy shit, Hibiki.

Goddamn. That’s a really sexy sword, actually! Pretty nice...

...oh.

You’re not looking so hot, pal...

“why is it that every opponent of mine can literally asspull all this garbage and im stuck here looking like a bad kamen rider villian getting my ass kicked every time. its not fair.”

Ryoko looks extremely hyped for this event. Maybe a little too much so.

“MAN FUCK THIS NONSENSE IM PUTTING AN END TO THE SUPER SENTAI POWERUP”

“O-OH FUCK- uh, i didnt say that. totally swear. you uh, keep doing that. yeah. aha.”

“SLICED...”

“...HONEYBAKED...”

“oh god. oh god. im sorry. im sorry. im so sorry. oh fuck im so sorry. honeybaked ham is better. fuck turkeys. fuck drumlegs. fuck any sort of fried meat. honeybaked ham is better please im begging you dont vore me or slice me in half IM BEGGING YOU OH GOD”

“...HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM!”

“ham..... mmmmm... honeybaked ham....”

“WHO YELLED ABOUT HAM? god, im hungry now.”

Hibiki wakes up from it all after passing out, expressing a power of magnitudes unheard of, as if it were all a bad dream.

“YEAH THATS RIGHT WE HAD TO DELIVER THE WEED PIZZA AND I WANTED HAM AND- THE SWORD, YEAH! THE SWORD!”

To her disappointment, amongst this wanton destruction, no ham was found. Ryoko clues her in that Hibiki just single handedly completed a relic, and though the entire place is a mess, the mission wasn’t a complete failure. They’ll just have to return the relic back to base, now the entire location is, conveniently, destroyed.

“yeah yeah. the weed made it. the sushi made it. the pizza made it. what didnt we deliver today?”

“...”

“singing really does make you hungry, huh?”

#symphogear #symphogear season 1 #anime #comedy #recap

12 notes · View notes

moonstarphoenix · 5 years

Text

World Figure Skating Championship Mens LP Pt. 1

We are down to the final competition of the 2019 World Figure Skating Championships. Tonight, we will see the men battle it out for their medals. Will Yuzuru Hanyu overtake Nathan Chen? Will Jason Brown manage to hold onto the silver? So many questions. Let’s get to it.

Again, I’m only covering the last two groups because there are just so. many. competitors. Enjoy.

Quick note, out of all the Romeo and Juliets this season (and there have been a lot), I like Junhwan Cha’s the best.

Mikhail Kolyada stars us off with this group. Landed his first combo easily but fell out of the second one. Ah Carmen. A tried and true for men and woman. After that step out, he seems to have his leg back under him. There doesn’t seem to be a lot of choreography, is there? That said, that was an excellent long program for him. Much better than the short. Not bad. He’ll go to first for now but he won’t remain obviously.

Morisi Kvitelashvili is next. Oh that first combo was not clean at all. Interesting music choice he has but he’s just skating on top of it, not in it. And he seems kinda slow. I’m just not into it.

Andrei Lazukin is someone I either haven’t seen or don’t remember. He seems so young. It’s funny after a season that seems to be dedicated to the 1998 film version of Romeo and Juliet to hear the classical ballet. He staying out his feet, so that’s good and his has more choreography than some of the other programs I’ve seen. A little slow, but kid’s got potential. Not bad. He could be a contender in seasons to come. As Mishin is his coach. That explains it.

Kevin Aymoz has had a breakthrough season. I love his short and I love the different tone of his long program. Step out of the quad. He’s got some of the most interesting choreography in this program. Ouch that was a bad fall. Nice recovery though. I really love this program. The choreography, the emotions. Oh he cut his hand! It looks like it was during that last step sequence! Ouchie! There’s blood on the ice from his ending position. That was a pitiful ow. :( I adore him though. I can’t wait to see his development in the coming seasons as well.

Boyang Jin is ready to put his bad season behind him and skate the way we know he can. He’s got a lot of power in his jumps, to the point they are almost out of control, but he gets his quad. He’s landing more of his jumps, a little shaky on his second quad but he will get credit for it. Not his best but definitely miles better than he had been doing previously all season. Those are some high scores and I am happy for him. That had to have helped his confidence a lot.

Michal Brezina looks like the classic greaser. I love it. And the music is classic rock. How fabulous! Lots of pointing at the crown. That’s very cheesy and silly. It is an interesting program. I’ll give him that, but it could do with better choreography which seems to be my complaint tonight. Yeah. I’m not feeling it that much.

#figure skating #worlds 2019 #junhwan cha #mikhail kolyada #morisi kvitelashvili #kevin aymoz #boyang jin #michal brezina

1 note · View note

skylar-lei1634 · 5 years

Text

There are five levels of pain

1) ouchie

2) ouch

3) ow