#vodka aunt
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I just came to the horrid conclusion that I am in fact a Vodka Aunt™.
I am the uncle who will take your child to an ice cream parlour and let them go ham on anything they want.
I will take them to walmart and let them get any lego set they want.
I will take them to a cat cafe knowing DAMN WELL THAT THEIR FATHER IS ALLERGIC TO CAT HAIR so we can laugh about it later while I'm drunk off my ass.
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1 vodka down 3 more to go.
#absolut vodka#vodka thoughts#vodkacocktail#vodka tower#vodkaart#vodka aunt#vodka mutini#vodkacupcakes#vodka sauce#citron vodka#vodkaverinbana#alchohol addiction#alcholmarkers#alchol mention#tw: alcholism#alchol tw#alcholic#viral on internet#viral online#viral on social media#follow me#follow#comments really appreciated#{ ic commentary }#comment#comments#100 likes#likesforlike#50 likes#10000 likes
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Kevin Day vibes
#kevin is an alcoholic hands down#but he’s more athletic than me so who i am i to judge#kevin day#vodka aunt#queen of exy#aftg#all for the game#aftg textpost#aftg foxes#the foxhole court#the raven king#foxes#the king’s men#aftg kevin#queen#exy#aftg soundtrack#Spotify
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Teen Dad AU
Tag list: @live0rdive @y4r3luv @jonesn4coffee @sofadofax @jackiemonroe5512 @sensationalsunburst @scarlet-malfoy @l393ndjean @asspirin-s @fandomz-brainrot
Tag list is open until I finish this series so feel free to ask to be added!!
.
Steve Harrington had a son.
An actual son.
And his name was Louie.
And little Louie Harrington was Steve’s pride and joy.
But there was a problem. Steve was 17. 17 years old and with a son.
It’s fine.
Martha Timbley was the mothers name. “Was” because after she gave birth and dropped Louie off with an extensive apology, her parents packed everything up and took her to New York.
So Martha Timbley was the mother, until she had to leave.
Then Nancy might’ve been, but she met Louie after they had already broken up. Nancy was content with simply knowing about Louie’s existence. Steve wouldn’t hold it against her, really.
Louie was Steve’s pride and joy, as said before, and he loved to talk about him to people.
Except Steve is 17. And the only friends he has are a bunch of 8th graders and his ex girlfriend and her new boyfriend. 99% of which don’t even know about Louie’s existence.
So Steve didn’t get to talk about Louie as much as he’d like.
Speaking of the baby Harrington, there was a soft cry from Steve’s bedroom. Steve, who had been in the bathroom getting ready for a shower, rushed in to pick up a now crying baby Louie.
“Hey hey hey, it’s alright baby it’s alright. What’s the matter honey? You hungry? I bet you are, huh?”
Steve loved talking to Louie. Which makes him sound pathetic. Louie’s only 6 months old at this point in time. And for him to be Steve’s favorite person to talk to?
That’s just kind of sad.
But the point still stands.
Steve carried Louie carefully downstairs and into the kitchen. Steve never put Louie down while making the bottle, gently bouncing on his feet and rocking back and forth.
The bottle was easy enough to make. Steve took it into the living room and sat on the couch with Louie in his arms. Little Louie drank the bottle right up to the delight of Steve. His big brown eyes stared right at him while his little baby hands curled around his ears. Steve chuckled quietly.
Little Louie had Steve’s eyes, much to his delight. But he had a mix of his and Martha’s hair, curly and mostly brown with blond highlights— like Steve’s— but had a ginger tint to it that reflected Martha’s firey curls.
Louie finished the bottle and Steve burped him gently. It was nearing only 5 PM on that Tuesday in August of 1984, but Steve felt himself growing tired and worn with exhaustion. Louie was a sucker to put to sleep and to keep asleep, often waking in the night with screams and cries and needing to be held in order to fall to sleep.
Which was fine with Steve. Well— the holding part. He didn’t really like the screaming and crying part but that was to be expected with babies of Louie’s age.
Steve liked holding baby Louie during the night. But he often feared that he’d roll over and crush the boy. So, Steve let Louie sleep on the bed with him while surrounded by pillows at all times.
It was around 6 PM now on that fine Tuesday. Steve finally plated up a small dinner for himself of pasta. He let Louie gnaw on a couple of noodles while Steve rocked him gently.
It was nearing 7 when Steve finally out Louie down for the first time in nearly 3 hours. Louie wasn’t asleep, not quite yet. But Steve tucked him in and surrounded him in pillows as if he was.
Steve turned the radio on and turned it down real low. He let the soft tunes of some country song lull little Louie to sleep.
Louie fell asleep clutching a small bear Martha gave him. Steve was upset that she couldn’t be in Louie’s life. Even if there wasn’t anything between the two of them Louie deserved to know his mother cared. Steve sighed.
As much as he wanted to collapse on his side of the bed, he refrained.
Instead, Steve pulled out a duffel bag from under his bed and set to work. His parents would be expected home in two days, and he already knew what the outcome would be.
They’d enjoyed their trip to where-ever-the-fuck for the past 7 months, they’d made sure Steve knew how much they didn’t miss him over the phone when they asked about the house and neighbors more than him.
But that’s fine. It’s whatever. Steve didn’t need their approval. He’d stopped caring about it after sophomore year; when he’d won his first game with the winning shot and they hadn’t bothered to say anything outside of “you should be doing that all the time”.
So really? Fuck them.
But they were currently Steve’s only means of housing.
So he’s kind of fucked.
But he packed the duffle bag nice and tight. He packed the bag with his clothes and a blanket and moved to pull out a suitcase he still had from his first (and last) trip with his parents when he was 9.
Into the suitcase went most of Louie’s stuff; clothes, toys, extra bottles that weren’t going to be needed until Thursday. And then he packed one of the smaller pockets with his important things; birth certificates and the papers showing that his car was in fact his.
He already had a diaper bag with the rest of Louie’s stuff. He kept it packed all the time for when he could convince Nancy to babysit for him. Like tomorrow.
Tomorrow, Steve would have work from 9 in the morning to 5 in the afternoon. Not ideal but he needs the hours. Nancy would be over by 8:30 with a promise of watching Louie.
Steve doesn’t know how Nancy hasn’t clued anyone in on Louie’s existence. But as much as he wanted to question it he didn’t fancy pushing his luck.
With the bags packed he set them aside by his door. He’d put them in the car tomorrow when he left for work. But for now, he all but collapsed on his bed. He had the vague feeling of Louie wrapping his little hands around his finger before he officially passed out.
…
First part is officially out!! I’m working on my s3 steddie part 4 behind the scenes but that should be out soon as well. Expect part 2 of this sometime in the following week.
Second Part:
#stranger things#steve harrington#eddie munson#nancy wheeler#teen dad steve harringon#he’s an amazing dad#little louie has life cut out for him#nancy isn’t too bad in this#she’s like a resigned vodka aunt in the beginning but she works on it#you’ll get more plot in the next part I promise#eventual steddie#eddie munson x steve harrington
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Pickles the Drummer doodily doo (ding dong doodily doodily doo)
#i love him#in my metalocalypse era#Quality got butchered a bit#male thot enemy of the state#metalocalypse#pickles the drummer#metalocalypse fanart#dethklok#gay wine aunt but instead of wine it's vodka
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Hello nightmargin oneshot!
My headcanon is Rue being the "cool wine aunt"
how accurate is this
VERY
#SHE REALLY IS THE WINE AUNT#kip is the vodka aunt#silver is the sober aunt but she makes up for it by being a truck freak
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Please let Eris have her vengeance without condemning her please let Eris have her vengeance without condemning her please let Eris have her vengeance without condemning her please let Eris have her vengeance without condemning her please let Eris have her vengeance without condemning her
#destiny 2#season of the witch#season of the witch spoilers#if eris dies in this season im leaving#i fully and violently support my hive magic vodka aunt and if the writers disagree they're wrong#let her be a little insane and win because of it#we know by now that eris absolutely CAN be trusted with dark and corruptive powers#and the writers better fucking remember that#don't you dare try to make my girl a villain for being angry
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Please, hear me out for a second. I think Neil is the dad friend of the monsters. (But like a specific dad friend. The one who was, at one point, the reckless younger brother who had a couple kids and then was like "oh no... this is going to be interesting.")
And not because he's Andrew's boyfriend but for the fact that he could be bleeding out on the sidewalk and he'd still tell everyone he could totally walk it off.
Would Neil forget your birthday until a week later when he sends a belated birthday text with the words: Your birthday is today right? Hell yes he would.
Would he randomly and umprompted info dump on you with things that may or may not leave you traumatized but he never ever elaborates on or brings up again? He has and he will again.
Dad jokes? He's got plenty. (His favorites are math jokes.)
Does he know how to fix really specific things but can't figure out how his cell phone works? You betcha.
Is he like my dad and brings up weird cartoons he watched as a kid and then asks: "remember that?" Probably!
Like some dads, you collect Neil lore like you would collect Pokémon on a Saturday night.
Thank you for coming to my TEDtalk.
#the monsters#aftg#kevin is the vodka aunt#nicky gives me grandma who just wants group pictures of everyone vibes#and aaron is the cousin who didn't want to come but free food was promised and he's broke
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I can't wait for the Fabian "absolutely not, I'm gonna have to kill all of them" Aramais Seacaster to the Fabian "I will beat up my sibling's bullies I don't care if it's an unfair fight Aramais Seacaster character development
#fantasy high junior year#i need it so much#they cant NOT do this#meanwhile fig is the vodka aunt sibling#teaching them how to sneak out#giving em cloves way too early#helping them draw on the entire house
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merry christmas you filthy animals.
#i have a vodka and a cheesy movie on while i wrap gifts#i hope it’s a good day for those celebrating#and for those not then i still hope it’s a good day#whatever you’re doing#witch aunt talks✨
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Human!Impala flirts with Dean this, Human!Impala is a guy that, Dean's Fucking His Car blah blah blah but CONSIDER INSTEAD:
Human!Impala is a permanent thing (they were a shapeshifter trapped as a car), Baby presents almost entirely as female, Baby is EXTREMELY hot, every bit the conventionally hot, busty, country-western playboy model "beautiful woman" that early-seasons Dean would have described her as
...Baby is a complete disaster lesbian and takes over early-seasons-Dean's role as "the one who brings a different random girl home ever night"
#also she's more like an adoptive mom/older sister/vodka aunt to Sam & Dean#“Dean's fucking his car lol. especially in early seasons”#or perhaps the car is only into women and the car and early-seasons Dean have similar taste because they read the same playboy magazines#“nobody's Drinking Hard Fucking Bitches in spn anymore” well get ready for a disaster lesbian just freed from several decades of Being A Ca#human!impala#supernatural#the impala#Baby supernatural
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two masked gays and their nerd daughter, a family photo
#viper cameo on the left and she's the vodka aunt (sova provides the vodka)#killjoy#cypher#omen#amber shitposts#cypher x omen
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I didn’t even tell you fuckers (fuckers being the blog, ur not real this is my vore journal and ur all snacks) I had to go to the hospital for a psych evaluation.
The conclusion was that I was just drunk, not manic like everyone was worried about. Told you fuckers
I didn’t join the grippy sock gang tho.
No more booze for M for a while. Been sober of it for a month and a bit now I think.
Also I’m good n safe rn but I mean, you don’t run a vore blog unless there’s something fucky with your brain/j
Don’t drink alone gang :) and if you do and/or you’re in a pit you’re not a bad person, you just need help, those are two different things. Love u
#taking vodka aunt to a whole new level#I hate how good I am at chugging those mother fuckers lmao#m’s random shit#tw alchol#tw hospital
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season 2 feelings aside, please see this early birthday gift i got from @jack-white-is-judging-you which is insane and i love her for that so much
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the whole fam alignment chart pt 2/? [x]
#actually zelena is a vodka aunt but you get the point#snow white#regina mills#david nolan#emma swan#henry mills#zelena mills#belle french#rumple#the whole fam#alignment chart#once upon a time#ouat
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