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scrapyardboyfriends · 7 years

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11 July 2017 - This is so ridiculously long. This is what happens with a robron heavy hour long episode. It obviously gets super depressing at the end if you make it that far. You don’t have to read past the #TriggerWarning if you don’t want to. Let me know if any of you make it to the end of this nonsense. I hope some of it is funny.

[Outside the Shop with Robert, Aaron, Cain and Victoria]

ROBERT: We do have a kitchen at home you know? Remember that set they built us that we never use unless it’s for angsty scenes?

AARON: Yeah, but do we have a toaster yet? Nevermind. Didn’t really fancy seeing you though after our Plot fight yesterday. It’s the height of #PeakAngstWeek so I’m just going to be in a totally justifiably bad mood all day today, yeah?

ROBERT: Is this really how it’s gonna be?

AARON: No, this is how you...well the Plot really...but anyway...have made it. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go to work.

ROBERT: Well, it’s a good thing we conveniently work in the same place then. - side note, isn’t it great our jobs are semi important to the Plot today so it looks like we actually do them -

AARON: I never should have let Jimmy move the Haulage firm into the portacabin. I would have saved myself so much trouble.

ROBERT: Will you just let me explain what I think the Plot is trying to do one more time Aaron?

AARON: You don’t need to try and explain anything. I’m done with all the discourse. I just don’t like it. End of.

*Cain appears*

CAIN: Want me to batter him for you?

AARON: Have you even been briefed on our latest Plot Point?

CAIN: No, I just like hitting Sugden here and since you two got together properly, I haven’t had a chance to do it in a while. Let me know. Besides, I just needed to show that I remember you exist so that when I show up later to help you out, it’s a little less forced.

*Cain leaves*

AARON: Imagine what he’d do if he actually knew.

ROBERT: What are we arguing about again? What, that I didn’t shell out my life savings to help out his granddaughter the Plot never remembers is my niece anyway. And besides, she got her treatment. If I had stepped in, how would Faith have gotten her dramatic entrance?

*Victoria appears*

VICTORIA: You had the money to help Sarah?

ROBERT: Why are we having this conversation in the middle of the street?

AARON: No idea. I’m going to work where I probably won’t actually do any work. How does my business survive?

*Aaron leaves*

ROBERT: Don’t you start! *So tired of this Plot Point Face*

VICTORIA: Robert, she’s your niece!

ROBERT: *Oh now the Plot remembers Face*

VICTORIA: And she’s a sick little girl?!

ROBERT: And if the Plot needed me to, of course I would have stepped in. I can’t account for the Plot holes until the Plot decides to bring them up again for drama, Vic!

VICTORIA: And did you have the money to buy the house to stop Aaron from worrying about using his dad’s?

ROBERT: What? Did you get the same list from Tumblr that Aaron did? Or do you have our house bugged so you could listen to our arguments so you could weigh in later? *Leaves*

VICTORIA: Where are you going?

ROBERT: To get some earplugs cause clearly you’re never going to leave me alone about anything.

VICTORIA: You should pop to the shop that sells consciences while you’re at it!

ME: And condoms! I bet they sell condoms too! Just saying. (The beginning of conscience sounds like condoms and I couldn’t help myself)

[The Mill of Misery with Robert and Victoria]

ROBERT: *To some pour soul on the phone* I don’t want a credit note. Everything that you sell is for geeks. (FANDOM: But you are a geek Robert, don’t lie. #LetGeekRobertRise)

*Victoria knocks and enters*

ROBERT: Forget it. I’ll burn them. #Foreshadowing Keep the money! Buy yourself some Spiderman underpants. - They’re great. I actually have a pair. They’re the only ones my husband doesn’t steal from me. Though I think he just enjoys seeing me in them...and taking them off of me...which we haven’t done in a while. I wonder if that’s a Plot Point I should be paying more attention to….sorry...TMI? - What? Sorry, knickers then.

VICTORIA: *My brother is a moron Face*

ROBERT: I was so distracted by this stupid Plot that I didn’t even realize it was a woman. What are you doing?

VICTORIA: Nothing, just letting my temporary personality transplant settle in while I enjoy these amazing Plot chairs of yours. What are you doing? Spreading more joy?

ROBERT: The shop won’t refund me for the Plot chairs.

VICTORIA: *Really enjoying the Plot chair* Why would you want to get rid?

ROBERT: Because Aaron doesn’t like them and if Aaron doesn’t like something it goes. #Whipped

VICTORIA: Why are you still here then? #Burn

ROBERT: *So tired of this Plot Point Face* I was trying to do the right thing, Vic. Invest that money for our future, but the Plot is just setting me up for failure this week.

VICTORIA: Yeah, but you also just really like money.

ROBERT: Maybe. Character continuity is important Vic. I wish you’d remember that more often. Do you want the chairs?

VICTORIA: *Still enjoying the Plot chairs* I’d never leave the house. Then who would tell you how Rebecca is feeling?

ROBERT: They’re going cheap!

VICTORIA: Really seeing that character continuity now, Rob. It’s not all it’s cracked up to be you know. Sometimes character growth is more important.

ROBERT: Fine, take the chairs. I don’t care about the money.

VICTORIA: There, that’s better. That’s the kind of thing Aaron needs to see you doing. You have to convince him that you don’t care that having a ton of money in the bank is the most important thing in the world. Even though the Plot will make you think so when it inevitably brings up this argument again in the future.

ROBERT: *Thoughtful I’m totally going to do the wrong thing because I’m an idiot and the Plot hates me Face*

FANDOM: Did we just get through an entire Vic scene where she didn’t once mention the Plot Baby and she actually seemed somewhat concerned with how Robert AND Aaron were doing? Can we keep this version of Vic?

[The Scrapyard with Aaron and Adam (FANDOM: A Bartsy scene!!! With #ActualConversation!? What have we done to deserve this?)]

*Plot Barrel makes its deubt*

AARON: *Kicks the door* *Kicks the door again* (FANDOM: Is the door a representation of the Plot?)

*Adam drives up*

ADAM: Whoa! What are you doing?

AARON: Kicking this door. (FANDOM: Yep, definitely a representation of this Plot.) #Relatable

ADAM: Oh right, good, cause I was fed up with it not being broken! (FANDOM: Broken like our hopes and dreams and hearts…)

AARON: *Kicks the door again* #StillRelatable

ADAM: Has this got something to do with a certain unborn Plot Baby?

AARON: No! The Plot Baby isn’t the problem...well actually the Plot Baby is totally the problem but at least he’s being honest about that. (FANDOM: Is he though?) There’s a time scale to it so I know where I stand with that, which is more than I can say for him. I think I know where I stand with him and then it turns out that I don’t and then I do and then I don’t and mate this Plot makes me so tired and since we’re never allowed to have an #ActualConversation, especially one that doesn’t get forgotten about until the next Maxine episode, it’s really hard to keep it all straight.

ADAM: Well...we could get drunk?

AARON: It’s half nine in the morning Adam! Besides, alcohol is how this whole mess started.

ADAM: Fair point. Guess you’ll just have to talk to me sober then. *hits Aaron on the back of the head* - for the fans - In!

[The Portacabin with Aaron, Adam and Robert]

ADAM: 580 grand? Why are you not out car shopping right now? The way you two go through cars, I’m sure you’ll need another one soon. (ACTOR ADAM: Or you could get one that Ryan can actually get out with his dodgy knee!)

AARON: You’re missing the point. (DANNY: Though I’m sure Ryan would totally appreciate that.)

ADAM: No I’m not. I get it, but you can’t make people think the same as you mate. If you could, I totally wouldn’t be in this mess of a Plot with Vic that is currently taking a back seat to your Plot as usual. And it worked out in the end.

AARON: That’s not the point either.

ADAM: So what is the point? That Robert’s still an idiot?

AARON: And a liar when the Plot needs him to be, probably to make me cry some more.

ADAM: And you think that’s gonna change do ya?

AARON: Well something needs to. The fans are tired of me crying all the time.

ADAM: Is there more to this?

AARON: *About to possibly tell Adam important things about his feelings for once in his life*

*Plotbert and his briefcase full of cash money enter right on time for that not to happen*

ROBERT: Oh sorry, were you actually in the middle of an #ActualConversation. I don’t believe in those, so it’s gonna have to wait. *Is the literal definition of overdramatic as he swipes Adam’s feet off the desk to put down the briefcase and open it up with a determined look on his face to reveal stacks of fifty pound notes*

AARON: *Are you actually serious right now Face*

ROBERT: *Serious about you Face*

[Portacabin and Scrapyard with Robert, Aaron, Adam, the briefcase full of money and Plot Barrel]

ADAM: Do you need anyone to look after that?

ROBERT: Well you can take a selfie with it. #ThisIsWhatRealMoneyLooksLike *Ridiculously OTT Wink* But if you do, make sure to tag me on Instagram. I want people to know it’s my money. #HasLearnedNothingSinceHisLastScene #SetUpForFailure

ADAM: Humble, mate, very humble. I’ll leave you to your Plot Point now. My work is done here. See ya in a bit or not, because I’m not as relevant as I’d like to be.

AARON: *My husband is such an idiot Face* So what is this?

ROBERT: *Captain Obvious Mode Activate* A hundred grand.

AARON: *When will the Plot let my husband be less of an idiot Face*

ROBERT: It’s all I could get on such short notice. But I’ll get some more tomorrow. Cause this is totally what you wanted right?

AARON: And the reason for all of this is?

ROBERT: For you to give to Liv to pay for the house, obviously.

AARON: But the house has already been paid for.

ROBERT: Not the way you wanted. See, look! I listened. Now, praise me!

AARON: *Sorry, not going to praise you today Face*

ROBERT: But I’m giving you MONEY to prove to you that you mean more to me than MONEY.

AARON: Really? Cause all this looks like is you chucking a load of cash at your problems again.

ROBERT: No Aaron, it’s not just cash. It’s MONEY!!!

AARON: See what I mean!

ROBERT: I’m making quite a big gesture here. That’s always done me so much good in the past….wait…

AARON: I don’t want gestures! - I want #ActualConversation but in lieu of that - I just want to know I come before the money.

ROBERT: Without #ActualConversation, I don’t know what more I can do to prove it to you.

AARON: I have a great idea! Burn it!

ROBERT: That’s the opposite of a good idea Aaron.

AARON: But look, Plot Barrel is right there with a fire burning just for you. Burn it!

ROBERT: What’s that gonna do? Other than win me the world’s most stupid man award which I’m probably already in line for due to this ridiculous Plot.

AARON: *Walks out rambling about Robert and his precious money so he’s distracted*

ROBERT: *Is the literal definition of an over dramatic drama queen and slam dunks the briefcase full of money into the Plot Barrel of fire*

AARON: *Oh my god he actually did it Face*

ROBERT: *Oh my god I actually did it Face* *See, told you I loved you more than MONEY Face*

*Ad break to add extra drama*

AARON: *Uselessly tries to fish out the briefcase full of money with a piece of copper pipe*

*Chopstick banter* - hehe

AARON: What were you thinking?

ROBERT: You told me to burn it! I do everything you say!

AARON: Well that’s not true and you picked a bad time to start! *Get’s fire extinguisher*

*Super adorable scene of them fighting with the fire extinguisher and laughing and smiling and forgetting the Plot exists for a few precious seconds* - for the fans before the #PeakAngst begins

[Robert’s Porsche with Robert and Aaron]

*Cute banter about Aaron being a shit fireman and Robert burning the money*

AARON: No more lies (PLOT: Well that’s just not going to work)

ROBERT: No more lies (PLOT: That was a lie right there. Don’t make promises I won’t let you keep) If I could change this whole Rebecca Plot I would, Aaron, you know that.

AARON: Yeah I know.

ROBERT: I know it’s hard. #Understantement #Foreshadowing That Plot Baby is nothing to do with me and I will never ever ever let that situation come between me and you.

*The situation appears*

AARON: You shouldn’t have jinxed it. You gonna stop?

ROBERT: You want me to? But we just agreed…

AARON: The Plot put her there for a reason, Robert.

ROBERT: If it was anyone else…

AARON: Yeah, that’ll be the day.

ROBERT: *Puts car in reverse*

AARON: *I hate this fucking Plot Face*

[Side of the Road with Robert, Aaron and Rebecca]

AARON: *Dirty Little Grease Monkey Mode Activate* - for the fans (FANDOM: *Swoon*)

ROBERT: Do you have breakdown cover?

REBECCA: I don’t know. It’s not overly important to the Plot so I probably never bothered. And I once told Chrissie I knew a thing or two about cars because of all my travels but that knowledge has left me. So anyway, I phoned a taxi. I’m conveniently in a hurry.

ROBERT: Dare I ask where you’re going?

REBECCA: Hospital. I booked a scan.

ROBERT: Well I’m sure the taxi will be here soon and we can be on our way and continue ignoring this part of the Plot.

REBECCA: Well they said fifteen but I’m not sure I’ve got fifteen...I drank about a liter of water…

ROBERT: Why would you do that?

AARON: Helps with the scan. What? I’ve been doing some research on pregnancy. Someone has to. The writers and the storyliners aren’t. So...you want to take her? #AlreadyRegrettingThis

REBECCA: No, no, no! I’ll wait. (FANDOM: Why don’t you want him to go? #LetTheTheoryLive)

ROBERT: I suppose we could drop her off…

REBECCA: No, no it’s fine. #LetTheTheoryLive

AARON: Go on, you take her. #DefinitelyRegrettingThis

ROBERT: But we had plans…

REBECCA: I don’t want to ruin your plans… #Hilarious

AARON: It’s fine. I’ll walk back.

ROBERT: You can’t walk…

REBECCA: Are you sure? Wouldn’t want to be a burden.

AARON: I know all about not wanting to be a burden. Good luck with everything *Walking away* #RegrettingEverything

ROBERT: I’ll meet you in the pub after!

REBECCA: Is he okay?

ROBERT: Umm...probably not. But let’s get this over with.

AARON: Ethan! Mate, glad you’re conveniently out of jail when I need you. I need to see you now.

[Outside the Hospital with Robert and Rebecca]

REBECCA: Thanks for conveniently finding me on the side of the road and bringing me here. What are you doing now?

ROBERT: Paying for parking. The Plot obviously wants me to be here.

REBECCA: Yeah well you don’t really need to come in.

ROBERT: True...I could stay in the car and just give you a lift back.

REBECCA: Yeah whatever, I really need to go, in more ways than one. I’ll just leave you to think about it.

ROBERT: *Conflicted Face*

[Hospital Waiting Room with Robert and Rebecca]

REBECCA: *I really have to pee Face*

ROBERT: *I want to be literally anywhere else Face* What time is this scan supposed to be?

REBECCA: Now? You don’t have to stay.

ROBERT: Like I said, the Plot wants me to be here so...are you okay?

REBECCA: No. I really need to pee and I need to know everything with this Plot Baby is okay. Of course it would probably help if I saw an actual medical professional but...whatevs.

RECEPTIONIST: (FANDOM: Well at least they paid for someone in the hospital to have a speaking role) Rebecca White?

REBECCA: Present!

RECEPTIONIST: Is Dad coming in?

REBECCA: Oh he’s not the- #LetTheTheoryLive I mean, well, he is… #GetYourStoryStraight

ROBERT: I’ll just wait here.

REBECCA: You can come in.

ROBERT: No, I’ll wait. If I go in then that would destroy all the fans’ hope that there really is no baby. I can’t do that to them. #LetTheTheoryLive *Conflicted Face*

[The Mill of Misery with Aaron, Ethan (FANDOM: Yay!), Jason (FANDOM: Ugh)]

*Ethan knocks*

AARON: Hey, you took your time. I’ve got to get this taken care of before my husband gets back. I sent him to do something that is only making me more miserable, which is why I needed to see you in the first place.

ETHAN: Well, me helicopter’s broke down, which is probably for the best. I hear you all don’t like those around here. Though I heard that didn’t stop-

AARON: Well you can afford the bus ticket I suppose since you’re conveniently selling drugs on the outside as well.

ETHAN: It’s great to see you too man. Didn’t think I’d be hearing from you again after the prison storyline was just dropped like that.

AARON: Yeah well, the fans complained about that, so here we are. You all right?

ETHAN: No, but you’ll find out about that in a moment.

AARON: Right, you coming in?

JASON: Does that invitation apply to me as well?

AARON: Definitely not. How are you out of prison as well?

JASON: Well too bad. The Plot gave me the drugs!

AARON: #BetrayedByThePlot #WhatElseIsNew

[Hospital Waiting Room with Robert and Rebecca]

ROBERT: *To Aaron’s Voicemail* Hey Aaron, I’m calling you for the fourth time just cause. I miss you and I love you and you mean more to me than MONEY and this Plot. I hope you got back okay. Call me!

*Rebecca returns*

ROBERT: Great! Can we go now! I have to get back to my #BeautifulHusband who I will always care about more than you.

REBECCA: Right, fine, but you might care about this baby when I tell you the sex. Do you want to know?

ROBERT: *Conflicted Face* Sure, fine, whatever.

REBECCA: It’s a boy.

ROBERT: *Super conflicted, I have so many daddy issues, how do I handle having a son, I’m in a complete panic now Face*

[The Mill of Misery with Aaron, Ethan, Jason and Cain]

*Jason is predictably an asshole to rile Aaron up*

*Jason is homophobic*

*Jason brings up Gordon*

AARON: Are we doing this or what?

JASON: I need to know that you really want it.

AARON: Obviously.

JASON: Not feeling it Livesy (Aaron Dingle Defense Squad: If you call him ‘Livesy’ one more time…)

AARON: I’ll pay you double. - I really should have taken that briefcase full of money with me -

JASON: You’ll pay me triple. And you’ll do a little dance for me.

AARON: Sorry, mate. I don’t dance. I might sway, but only with my idiot of a husband.

*Jason is an asshole*

*Jason is homophobic*

*Jason brings up Gordon*

AARON: *Is done* Get out of my house! *Punches Jason* (FANDOM: Yay!)

JASON: *Punches Aaron* (FANDOM: Not so yay…Aaron Dingle Defense Squad Assemble!) *Pulls out a knife* (FANDOM: Coward!)

ETHAN: Oh come on. Put the knife down.

JASON: You can go now.

ETHAN: Sorry mate, how was I to know when you called, the Plot would have gotten him out of prison as well.

*Ethan leaves*

JASON: One time, I stood up for someone and the kids that were picking on him turned on me so...now I’m a bully. Go me!

AARON: *Tries to run*

JASON: *Knocks Aaron to the floor*

*Enter Cain to the rescue* (FANDOM: Finally!)

JASON: Well if it isn’t Cain Dingle. I mentioned you once. Glad to see it’s finally being paid off.

Hard man Cain > Hard man Jason

JASON: *Throws drugs at Aaron*

AARON: *Apologetic Face*

CAIN: *Disappointed Face*

ETHAN: *I know this isn’t what the fans wanted of me Face*

[The Woolpack with Robert, Rebecca and Victoria]

REBECCA: You sure you don’t mind me telling Victoria? Cause, she’ll obviously find out anyway. She knows more about me than I do.

ROBERT: Yeah, fine. Just don’t make a big deal about it in front of Aaron, the love of my life. *Looks around frantically for Aaron* Who is worryingly not here. Hmm...Plot, what are you up to now? Nothing good, most likely.

REBECCA: Is Vic working?

VICTORIA: Of course. I go where the Plot needs me. And...I feel my temporary personality transplant wearing off in 3…

REBECCA: We went to the scan.

VICTORIA: 2… The scan!!! Wait...you both went?

ROBERT: It was an accident okay! I didn’t want to be there! Let me make that perfectly clear.

VICTORIA: Fine, whatever. 1... So is everything okay?

REBECCA: Everything’s great with your nephew.

VICTORIA: BABY!!!! A NEPHEW!!! AWWWWWW! Mason, Grayson, Jayden…

REBECCA: Why are you naming my child?

VICTORIA: Well obviously I’ll be making this decision for you, so I’m just telling you what’s off limits. Also Braden and Brandon oh and definitely Walter, cause...Walter White. So that just leaves Vic! Cause I will be the most important person in his life so he should obviously be named after me. It’ll all make much more sense when I steal him from you after he is born...what? I’m not obsessed or controlling. Now, you go sit down and I’ll bring you a drink that I will decide on because you’re just a Plot Device and can’t make decisions on your own. Go on! Oh...Robert, what would you like?

ROBERT: You to remember that chat we had this morning about character continuity. Oh and an orange juice.

VICTORIA: Speaking of our chat this morning…*Makes money gesture with hand*

ROBERT: So...Bex, I guess we should set up a thing…

REBECCA: Very specific.

ROBERT: A trust fund or whatever. But Money and this Plot Baby are still not as important to me as Aaron. Again, just making that clear.

REBECCA: You want to do that.

ROBERT: It’s what the Plot wants.

REBECCA: You are the master of doing what the Plot wants.

ROBERT: Says the Plot Device. Look, I’m trying okay. So hard. If only the Plot would let me make some progress.

VICTORIA: Hey Bex, do you happen to have any proof that you actually went to this scan?

REBECCA: Yep, I got some 3D photos.

VICTORIA: Oh no, those don’t count. They look like badly drawn frogs. I guess I’ll just have to wait till it’s born. (Tinfoil Hat Fandom: Will it be?)

ROBERT: *Conflicted Face* Can I see? Damnit Plot! What are you trying to do to my resolve!?

[Outside the Mill of Misery with Aaron, Cain and Ethan]

AARON: Cain, wait up! I just want to say thanks for finally getting involved in my Plot. I was starting to think you forgot I existed.

ETHAN: Thank me too! I brought him to you as he was conveniently coming out of the pub earlier. I did good right?

AARON: Yeah, right. You did good.

ETHAN: Nice to see you mate.

AARON: Totally. If you want to move to the village with your girlfriend and baby and lesbian best mate, the fans will totally be cool with it. They’ve always said the show needs more lesbians and they like you.

ETHAN: Thanks mate. I’ll think about it.

*Ethan leaves*

CAIN: *Disappointed Face* Pathetic.

AARON: Look Cain, my Plot really really sucks. I needed a distraction.

CAIN: But do you not remember the Plot that broke up my own marriage? Your best mate’s sister died because of drugs! Remember?

AARON: Yeah, but...I’m struggling and if you knew anything about me at all, you would know that it was a huge deal for me to admit that. But when your husband is having a baby with a girl he got knocked up while you were inside, well, all bets are off.

CAIN: And drugs are going to fix that?

AARON: Well, no, probably not, but it’ll help me forget this Plot for a while.

CAIN: Again, do you not remember the Holly Plot? I also got word you brought it up with Ross when he was trying to sell drugs. If that’s not enough to deter you, then...I’ll see you at your funeral. (FANDOM: Umm...take that back)

[The Mill of Misery with Aaron and Robert]

AARON: *Stares at spice* *hears Robert coming in* *shoves spice down the side of the chair*

ROBERT: You’re back!

AARON: Been back ages…

ROBERT: And you couldn’t have sent me that as a message in response to the like 80 I sent you?

AARON: Don’t be so dramatic Robert, it was four.

ROBERT: So...what are you doing?

AARON: Sitting here...totally not doing anything suspicious at all.

ROBERT: I’m sorry for earlier.

AARON: Taking Rebecca to the hospital and leaving me to walk home?

ROBERT: Which you told me to do…

AARON: Well what was I supposed to say when we were already stopped?

ROBERT: Which, you also told me to do. Remember when I wanted to just drive right past her like she didn’t exist? Have I failed some kind of test here?

AARON: *Makes jokes to mask the pain*

ROBERT: I’m sorry. Everything is my fault. I really hate this Plot.

AARON: Did you go into the scan?

ROBERT: No, course not. Again, I only care about you. I waited outside.

AARON: In the car?

ROBERT: *Unnecessary Lie Alert* Yeah, course. - This will totally come back to bite me won’t it? - It’s a boy by the way. I’m only telling you because Vic knows cause she knows everything about this baby. *Unnecessary Lie Alert* Obviously I didn’t want to know but…

AARON: Wow, you’re having a son…

*Awkward tension filled silence* *Respective daddy issues boiling to the surface* *Both keeping quiet cause they don't want to hurt each other but are actually hurting each other more* #ThisPlotIsMiserable

ROBERT: So...once again, we are completely useless at our jobs - and I was so positive about that this morning - so let’s just skive off as usual and go get some tea at the pub.

AARON: Nah...I’m just going to push you away when I need you most. #IHateThisPlot

ROBERT: But I’ve missed you today *Off camera thigh touching* We clearly spend every moment together normally, so these few hours without you have felt like a lifetime. #Codependent

AARON: You go, I have to further my #PeakAngst Plot and you can’t be here for that.

ROBERT: I’ll pretend I heard you say you’ll meet me at the pub.

*Soft forehead kiss* - for the fans before #PeakAngst

#TriggerWarning

AARON: *Throws away the drugs*

FANDOM: Yay!

AARON: *Goes and pulls out a knife from the drawer*

FANDOM: We knew it was coming and yet it’s still fucking awful

AARON: *Lifts up shirt*

FANDOM: That’s a lot of fresh cuts Aaron?! When did you start doing this again?! Now you turning down sex makes a lot more sense...have you had sex since the reveal?! You were planning on going to a cosy B&B to celebrate with german beer after the #SweetRevenge?! Was sex not on the table then? Or did you start after?! It’s no wonder your relationship is deteriorating more and more every episode. Sex was always how you communicated best...cause clearly words are not your strong suit. #GiveUsActualConversationPlease

AARON: *Self Harms*

FANDOM: *Cries* *Aaron Dingle Defense Squad Reactivate!*

#robron #emmerdale #plotdale #so soo long #can tomorrow and thursday not be as long?

61 notes · View notes

zevonandwaits · 7 years

Note

3, 4, 5, 6, 9, 10, 11, 17, 19, 22, 28, 30, 32, 33, 44, 47, 49, 50, 55, 56, 65, 68, 69, 72, 75, 76, 77, 79, 81, 82, 86, 87, 88, 89, 90, 93, 95, 100, 101, 107, 108, 115, 116, 117, 118, 119, 121, 122, 127, 128, 133, 138, 139, 142, 146, 148, 149, 150 YIKES I'm a nosy bitch good luck! :*

okay i FINALLY have the time to answer these (i think, i’m just bored in poli sci rn but still)

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

hmm……maybe i think it’s my parents, they’re coming to visit me on easter and that’s a while away but i can’t wait. also i can’t wait to see my friends from home over summer break (less than 2 months!!)

4. Are you easy to get along with?

honestly i think i’m too easy to get along with. i’ve been kind of a doormat my whole life because i’m afraid of confrontation and hurting people. that’s gonna change though. slowly, but surely it will change.

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

i don’t like like anybody right now….but i love my friends (like you) and i know for sure that they would

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

i guess people who don’t know how to treat me right.

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

HAHA yes i’m such a prude i always have to work myself up when i want to bring up the topic of sex with someone. i feel so awkward about what’s tmi, or about potentially grossing someone out, idk. sex is weird. let’s ban it (jk let’s not)

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

I think it was you

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

“Because they didnt put it up before” i’m currently freaking out to my parents because my college just decided NOW to notify me of a past due balance for this strep test that they made me take even though i looked on the site a few days ago and it wasn’t up there so i couldn’t pay it i hate them sometimes they’re so dumb (them being the school and their bad notification skills)

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

YEA and it’s exciting i just hope they don’t kill us

19. Do you like bubble baths?

nah son idk don’t kill me but i just don’t like baths in general i’d rather shower

22. Where would you like to travel?

lol i’m so basic but lately i’ve really been wanting to go to disney world, i haven’t been there in ages and i really miss it

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

honestly? myself

people give me anxiety i’m always scared of being judged

30. Do you ever want to get married?

yeah someday if there’s somebody that i want to marry enough. i don’t think it’s essential though it’s foolish to get married for the sake of getting married so

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

aaaaAAAA this is such an awkward question idk!??!?!?!? uhhhh????

happiness and love is my final answer

33. Spell your name with your chin.

omfg i’m in class rn

i’ll come back to this

okay

vic tkerua mjrsano

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

outer space ftw

some fish are really scary tbh

47. Have you ever been high?

nah son

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

well if i hope nobody finds out about it, what good is it to answer this question? ;)

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

coincidence! i’m wearing a hoodie right now! it’s light blue, my class color, and of course it’s a bryn mawr hoodie

55. Favourite blog?

honestly it’s kinda like a celebrity blog but all her posts are perfect and i really look up to her and support her because she is very lovely and perfect so uh here’s the link if you wanna check her out

56. Favourite colour?

sky blue

65. Are you hungry right now?

trick question i’m always hungry

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

i mean i like tumblr (unfortunately) but sometimes i go on twitter because there’s a user on there whose tweets are all gold here’s the link if you wanna see

69. Are you watching tv right now?

nah i’m just not paying attention in class

72. What colour are your towels?

the ones i have at college are dark blue but the ones i have at home are light blue

75. Favourite animal?

heckin cattos frn

76. What colour is your underwear?

pink lmao

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

omfg chocolate all the way, i hate vanilla stuff. vanilla ice cream is nasty tbh

i like vanilla in baking but still chocolate is better

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

it’s my aforementioned light blue bryn mawr hoodie

81. Favourite tv show?

i think you know the answer to this one ;)

82. Favourite movie?

benny and joon it’s so underrated but i’ve seen it like 30 times since i was like 14

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

squishy

87. First person you talked to today?

maybe my roommate? i honestly don’t remember i havent talked to many people today i had a bad dream and i’ve been groggy and grumpy ever since

88. Last person you talked to today?

my friend sitting next to me

89. Name a person you hate?

donald trump

90. Name a person you love?

YOU

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

honestly? this is such a disappointing answer but none! i want them though i just…..don’t have any

95. Last movie you watched?

begin again and i love you for suggesting it to me

100. How are you feeling?

healthy.

101. Do you type fast?

kinda, but i type very inaccurately so that kinda reduces my speed because i always have to backspace and retype stuff

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

yeah! i rode a horse in peru last year but i can’t ride horses and my horses name was diablo and he was a literal diablo and he kept running whenever he felt like it and it was very scary

108. What should you be doing?

probably paying attention but this class is optional today and shes not really saying anything important so w/e

115. Do you play the Wii?

i used to! it’s so old now though it’s become crotchety and i only use it for netflix now lmao

how things change, i used to be obsessed with it

116. Are you listening to music right now?

just the lovely monotony of my professor’s voice

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

yeah! i had some last night as i was watching begin again

118. Do you like Chinese food?

YEA honestly one of my fave things in life

119. Favourite book?

Flowers for Algernon come on addie you already asked me this ;)

121. Are you mean?

no but i should start to be in certain situations

122. Is cheating ever okay?

NO. that is a 100000% dealbreaker imo. if your s/o cheats it means that you’re not important enough to them and they don’t care about your feelings like at all so leave.

127. What makes you happy?

YOU

(and cats)

(and friends/family)

(and curling up and watching a movie/reading a book)

128. Would you change your name?

ehhh i mean i’m not a fan of my name but i feel like changing it would be such a hassle between the legal stuff and then people calling me by the wrong name or whatever, i don’t think it’s worth it

133. Favourite lyrics right now?

I should have known you’d bid me farewellThere’s a lesson to be learned from this and I learned it very wellNow I know you’re not the only starfish in the seaIf I never hear your name again, it’s all the same to me

And I think it’s gonna be all rightYeah, the worst is over nowThe mornin’ sun is shinin’ like a red rubber ball

thank u 2 pol simon

also i think u know why

138. Curly or Straight hair?

well my hair is curly but i really wish it were straight when im struggling with it lmao

i like curly hair though, when it’s nOT UNMANAGEABLE

139. Brunette or Blonde?

i always seem to prefer brunette guys tbh.

but my favorite person is blonde so idk ;)

142. Favourite month?

july. i love the heat and not having responsibilities

also i just realized my favorite person was born in july ;*