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#up the flour somehow)
why-the-heck-not · 1 month
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started a sourdough starter!!! It’s not even that much abt bread; I just like the idea of having a pet and this is about the max amount of responsibility I’m looking for rn
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musicalchaos07 · 17 days
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TV shows not having 26 episodes has robbed us of so many flour sack baby plotlines
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milkweedman · 2 years
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Found a dutch oven for like, astoundingly cheap yesterday and was finally able to try baking bread in one ! This is a poppyseed rye that I darkened with some molasses and cocoa powder, mostly out of curiousity (i often use molasses but this is the first time trying cocoa as well. Smelled super nice while baking). I added those after the first rise and didn't do a whole lot of kneading when i did, and it seems to have marbled, if the bit of exposed interior (didn't grease the dutch oven, and that part of the crust stuck) is anything to go by. Definitely overbaked it a little, but super happy with how much oven spring I got.
Also, the jams from last night. Very pretty reds.
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fruitless-vain · 1 year
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How hard do we think it would be to make your own parrot pellet
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I'm literally gonna cry my mom accidentally bought food with gluten in it and we didn't notice until we already ate it so I'm freaking the fuck out I have a concert 3 hours away tomorrow and I don't know what to fucking do
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ampharos-posts · 1 year
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wet glop... :(
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sigmadolos · 1 year
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@bitterseadrop​​​​​​​ said: [ WATCH ] sender sits on the counter while receiver cooks. 
soft action prompts  [ WATCH ] sender sits on the counter while receiver cooks. 
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   It was a different look than the manager usually sported, away from the shine and splendor of the casino floor that seemed to envelope him in divine glow. Here blue and white strands of hair were pulled up and back into a ponytail and the signature coat and vest were gone to leave him in he usual black long-sleeved turtleneck. Or rather, it had once been black. Now it was black and white, spotted with areas of flour from his cooking. There was a streak of it on his cheek as well. But rather than be BOTHERED by it as someone might expect of a man usually seen perfect and graceful, he only offered a cheerful smile.
   “  Wearing black in the kitchen might be a bit dangerous even as an onlooker. I’m a bit messy when it comes to dough making.  “  He gives a cheerful laugh that ends with a sheepish smile as he looks towards her before sprinkling some more flour on the counter to start rolling out the dough.
   “  I love the restaurants and bakeries on board.  “  Sigma starts with a pleasant tone, blowing a strand of hair that fell in his face. Unfortunately, the odd layering meant not all of it stayed in the ponytail. “ But there’s something about making it yourself, you know? I find it rather fun.  “  He’d never been able to before. Sure, it took a lot of effort to handmake things. But there was something satisfying about seeing all that hard work come together to make something wonderful. It was like the effort he put into the casino, only this he actually got to eat.
   Silver eyes turn from the dough to look up to her with another bright smile.  “  I promise I’m not usually this messy. Well....not with painting at least. Cooking I do tend to be a little messy with. Especially the first time I try making something. It always ends up looking like a tornado hit the kitchen...”  Not to mention the flurry of Greek that would spill out of his lips and the constant talking. Most of the time the food turned out perfectly fine and delicious, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t stress the whole time.
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chiisana-lion · 1 year
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mmmm kinda miss independence day festivals here they were always the most fun
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sapitties · 2 months
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PIEGON what if they all made food together on the farm and it was waffles and eggs from their chickens and Sam helped the kids that come to see the farm get rides on their gentle draft horse and Sapnap sprays everyone with the hose while they're gardening and Tony laughs at Sam and Sap failing to make some stupid elaborate dish I NEED this domestic fantasy rn
STOPSNKSM after they get a footing in setting up everything and having an adequate amount of animals they open up for ppl to come see and one day a school makes a field trip and they set up a bunch of fun activities for the kids and cooks door for lunch and while tony is letting them per cows sapnap comes in with the hose for a little fun and them sam is guiding them through riding horses helping the scared kids and tonynap is serving food and after they leave they all have intense baby fever
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Gonna be honest.
I hope it's a ho nest
Honus Wagoner
Yeah and like, NO tobacco usage anywhere
🚭 also like no kissing in my office ;)
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iamthekarmapolice · 7 months
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those videos make it look so easy 😭😭 i tried making malabar parotas once and it was so terrible
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lamplightjuniper · 10 months
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not even 12 noon EST yet but that’s enough for today. i’m going back to bed, good night
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evie-sturns · 13 days
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wrong room - Matt Sturniolo
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summary: you recently met nick through social media, he invites you over to his house for the night. while walking to the bathroom you accidentally enter the wrong room, walking in on matt masturbating.
contains: smut, caught masturbating, soft!dom matt, swearing, light choking.
a/n: this fic will contain different pov's between yours and matts, but it will have a little text so you will known when.
—----------------┌── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──┐----------———
i met nick just the other month at taras party, we instantly clicked resulting in him inviting me round today. i've been hanging out with him around his house his whole day with one of his triplet brothers, chris, i think.
(y/n's pov)
i lean against nicks countertop as he has a poor attempt to cook, "nick- nick no!" i laugh, grabbing the bag of flour as he repeatedly hits it with his elbow while mixing the dough.
"oh god, my fault" he says with a a grin as chris walks over, he spanks the cookie dough which is inside the mixing bowl, earning a slap from nick.
"okay- i'll give it a go." i decide to finally step up, nick steps out of the way as i look into the bowl, its somehow completely unmixed even after hes mixed for a solid 5 minutes.
i look over my shoulder, my eyebrows knit in confusion as i lock eyes with nick, "i'm actually not sure how i managed that."
"its okay baking isn't for everyone." i tease, he scoffs as chris laughs, "how do you mix for 20 minutes and all the ingredients look the exact same as when we put them in the bowl." chris says,
nick mocks him with a finger in the air and a nerdy tone, chris punches his shoulder.
i step away, "do you guys have a bathroom?" i ask, "nah we shit in the woods." chris says.
"yeah, we use the bark off the trees to wipe then bury it with our hands." nick adds on, unlocking the backdoor and opening it for me.
i go to walk out slowly, chris grabs my shoulder and spins me around, "down the hallway, and the last door on the left."
"oh-" i say with a loud laugh as i walk down the hall, i hear the metal of the bowl collide with the wooden floor from behind me "shit!" nick says.
i get to the end of the corridor and look to my right, the door is shut. i grip the handle and open it,
my eyes widen as i instantly grow hot, the third triplet, matt, is laying across the bed. hes wearing a green shirt and a necklace hangs loosely around his neck. his sweatpants are tugged down to his mid thighs as he's repeatedly running his hand up and down his length with his head thrown back.
(matts pov)
"fuck- fuck fuck-" strings of whimpers exit my mouth as slick noises fill the room, i brush my fingers over my sensitive tip before continuing to run my hand up and down my cock, the cold metal of my rings dragging against the veins.
"oh my god 'm- please please-" i whine, squeezing my eyes shut as i throw my head back against my headboard. my ears ring,
i dont even register the click of the door opening until i hear a feminine gasp "shit-" i hear.
my eyes spring open as i abruptly stop all hand movements, she stares at me in shock. her face is white and her mouth is open, after a few seconds she scrambles out of the room with several 'sorry's'
i sigh as my cheeks grow red, i didn't even cover myself. my hand is still wrapped around my length.
i stand up out of bed, my legs weak. i'm still hard but i've completely lost my train of thought, too embarrassed to think about finishing now. i hear the bathroom door slam shut, meaning that this girl has now found the bathroom.
i pull up my sweatpants, grabbing hand sanitiser off my bedside table and clean up my hands before pulling up my sweatpants.
"matt!!" i hear nick call from the kitchen. i open the door of my bedroom before making my way up the corridor.
(y/n's pov)
i unlock the door to the bathroom before walking back up towards the kitchen, the 3 triplets are there.
"we got the cookies in the oven but it turned to fucking liquid as soon as we put 'em in." chris says, pulling out the chair to the dining table and flopping down on it,
"this is matt, i don't think you've met him yet." nick says, matt and i lock eyes and he sticks his hand out for a hand shake.
i hesitate before shaking his hand, "formal ass greeting" nick says, elbowing matt and sitting down at the table, "sorry- 'm matt" matt says, running a hand through his hair "no worries, im y/n!" i say chirpily
all four of us gather at the table, matt is directly opposite me and i can feel his eyes lying on me, we keep making eye contact as chris and nick speak with each other about god knows, hes painfully attractive i have to admit, his tatoos, rings, awkward persona.
"its almost midnight, do you wanna start headed to bed?" nick asks me, i nod before walking off with nick towards his room.
"are you okay?" nick asks me as soon as the door shuts, "no- no i'm fine."
"is it matt?" nick laughs slightly as he pulls on a crewneck sweater and leaps into his bed. "yeah- no- i mean it's just i've met him before..?" i lie through my teeth, nick nods suspicously.
"well i'm tired as shit so i'm gonna cut it" nick says, "cut it?" i laugh, laying down beside nick.
"go to sleep? cut it....?" he smiles with a shrug.
-
nicks fast asleep, i just now remember the fact the cookies have been in the oven for over 35 minutes. i jump up, speed-walking out of the room and into the kitchen. i take out the metal tray, the 'cookies' are just lumps of charcoal now.
with a groan i exit the kitchen, i can see through the crack in his bedroom door that matt's still awake.
i don't know what posseses me but i knock softly on the door, "come in." i hear.
i open the door, matts shirtless in bed, still wearing those sweatpants from earlier.
(matt's pov)
my eyes widen as i see her walk into the room, "hi, uh- i just wanted to apologise for earlier." she says, i stand up out of bed to get closer to her, she shuts the door behind her. she’s only wearing a loose and long shirt which looks like a dress on her, with panties, which show every time she lifts up her arms.
"i should've knocked." she continues, i smile and shake my head.
"no i totally get it, honest mistake" i reply, "wasn't the best way to meet you so i'm sorry about that." she laughs slightly.
"its all okay," i say, "so you're not mad at me?" she asks shyly. "i would never be mad about that?" i sigh, pulling her into a hug.
theres a thick tension in the air, i don't know where it's come from but i know we are both feeling it.
she looks up at me, my arms are still loosely wrapped around her back.
she grabs my jaw before colliding our lips together, her lips are soft, i hesitate before kissing her back, my hand lacing into her hair.
i guide her back, she falls backwards onto my matress as our lips stay joined, our tongues now fighting for dominance.
her hands reach down and start tugging down my waistband. i pull away for a second, “are you sure?” i ask her, she nods frantically “please- yes.”
“arms up.” i say, she puts her arms above her head as i reach down, pulling off her loose tshirt. my eyes fall to her tits as my cheeks flush, she squirms on the matress impatiently.
i tug off her panties, discarding them somewhere across my room. she’s fully bare infront of me, her top teeth sinking into her bottom lip.
i lean over her to reach my bedside table, fiddling around in the drawer for a condom, “i’m on the pill,” she says grabbing my wrist and pulling me away
“oh shit okay!” i say, sounding a little too excited. she laughs slightly.
“you gotta be really, fucking, quiet.” i stare into her eyes, “nick is through that fucking wall and chris is the other side, if you get too loud i’ll stop mhm?”
she nods frantically “yes- yeah okay”
i line myself up with her, my hand travels down to grip her waist and i hold her hand with my free hand.
i push inside of her, instantly feeling her grip around me. i immediately worry, there’s not a single chance i’m lasting past a minute with her being this tight.
she lets out a delicate moan, holding herself back as she presses her lips together. i give her a minute to adjust before thrusting out to my tip, then pressing deeper inside of her.
with each thrust i pick up my pace as i stay concentrated on the wall, trying not to instantly cum.
she throws her head back, arching her back off my bed as every so often she lets out a shaky deep breath. i take the hand that’s on her waist and press down on her lower abdomen, seeing how far i can push her before she makes a noise.
i stop holding her hand with my other hand, and start tracing figure 8’s on her clit.
she finally breaks, letting on a desperate moan which seemed to come out louder than expected. i quicken my movements before slamming a hand over her pretty mouth. i hear a muffled ‘close’ and i continue to toy with her clit, keeping a hand plastered on her mouth.
she clenches around me, a whimper falls from my mouth as i feel her release, screaming my name.
i take my hand off her clit and place a hand on her throat, pressing lightly as she comes down from her high.
i pull out of her, finishing in my hand.
i flip down next to her, pulling her ontop of me and rubbing her back soothingly as i attempt to catch my breath. “matt..” i hear her say quietly,
“mhmm?” i reply, “can you walk me back to nicks room.” she says, sitting up on my thighs and reaching for her shirt.
“yeah, of course.” i say with a smile.
she crawls off of me to retrieve her underwear, which landed on my computer keyboard.
i sit up, pulling on my sweatpants and a soft shirt before grabbing her hand.
i creak open my bedroom door, she follows close behind me. i open the door to nicks room where he’s spread out on his bed, fast asleep. i pull down the covers and sweep her off her feet.
i lay her down on the bed, adjusting her head on the pillow before pulling up the duvet, i press my lips to her forehead before leaving the room.
————————-
(y/n’s pov)
9:38am
i wake up to the sun blaring on my face, i roll over, my legs still hurting from last night. i sit up, “nick” i tap him, he shoots up in bed.
“jesus!” i laugh, “how the fuck did you get up that fast- were you awake??”
nick erupts into laughter, “you scared me that’s all!” he says, i scoff before standing up out of bed, nick follows behind me as i open the door to his room.
i walk into the kitchen where chris and matt already are, leaning on the kitchen counter.
“good morning!” i say, matt shoots me a stupid smile “guess what.” chris says blankly, my heart drops, did he hear matt and i last night?
“what.” i instantly reply, looking over at matt who looks equally as nervous as me.
he walks over to the stovetop where the tray of ‘cookies were’ he picks them up and walks over to nick, matt and i.
“oh yeah- you dumbfucks left ‘em in the oven so i took them out.”
“what. the. FUCK is that” nick laughs, backing away from the burnt excuses of cookies.
“are they edible still?” chris genuinely asks, looking over at me for an awnser.
“chris what do you think.”
——————-
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dellalyra · 9 months
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OMG I WAS JUST HAVING BRAINROT ABOUT GOJO AND Y/N IN THEIR TEEN YEARS AND
imagine that back then they had to participate in a talent show or something and megumi and the rest watch the old video tape they found in the darkest corner of the library on campus.
the tape was in a box with a label reading "the best jujutsu tech students' and its just filled with memories of their teen years.
they decide to watch the talent show one and its just chaotic as hell. mid way through megumi, nobara and yuuji get caught watching it lmao
𝙡𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩𝙨, 𝙘𝙖𝙢𝙚𝙧𝙖, 𝙖𝙘𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣! 𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴
A/N: this request. came in last night - and it’s all I’ve done today because it was so perfect it’s all I could think about. ur amazing ily
CW: swearing, weed, suggestive stuff, mdni i stg shoo
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“Itadori! Bring these to the garbage!” Nobara shouts.
“Why me?! Why can’t you do it?!” He retorts as Megumi just rolls his eyes at the two of them, he wonders how they turned into siblings so easily.
“Fushiguro! Tell your boyfriend to take this to the garbage. It’s heavy and he should use his freaky wall-breaking strength for something useful!” She shouts back.
“Eh?! Is exorcising cursed and carrying you like a sack of flour not useful?! Or always carrying all your dumb shopping?!” They’ve broken into an all out sibling squabble by now, Megumi just turns away and continues the task of clearing out the storeroom behind the dojo in the school. Pushing boxes of old files and reports out of the way, he finds a box covered in doodles and stickers, taped shut at the top. He goes to inspect the very out of place container and finds words among the doodles of weirdly shaped beings and flowers.
‘The Best Jujutsu Tech Students.’
“Will you two shut up for two minutes, come look at this.” He says over his shoulder to the two, with Nobara releasing Yuuji from the headlock she somehow got him in.
“Ancient treasure! I told you we’d find something cool.” Yuuji shouts, pumping his fist into the air.
“What is this, Pirates of the Caribbean?! We’re clearing out a high school storage room, dumbass.” The girls rolls her eyes.
They inspect the box, trying to figure out the doodles.
“It doesn’t look super old? Open it, Itadori.” Nobara says.
“Will you quit telling me what to do?!” He says, huffing.
While they resumed the bickering, Megumi took a knife he had hidden in the shadows and sliced through the lines of tape holding the box together. The sound alerted the other two who peered into the box alongside him.
“Wait, are they… DVD’s?” Megumi asks.
“Yeah - but they’re homemade ones. Is there a label on them?” His boyfriend says, leaning in to get a closer looks.
The box itself was filled with small DVD cases of many colours - all labelled in a scrawling handwriting the kids felt like they knew.
“There’s a DVD player in the room where I hung out when I was dead.” Yuuji says, and hauls the box up and begins to walk. None of them even needed to discuss whether or not they’d be watching them, like a hive mind - but with maybe two shared brain cells.
They all made their way across campus, to a room in the same building as their Sensei’s office.
Nobara insisted on grabbing snacks from the vending machine en route, and they sat down on the sofa while Yuuji loaded the first date labelled ‘2003, December.” Well, that’s what they think it’s said. The handwriting was such a chicken scratch it almost looked like a doctor’s unintelligible writing.
The screen came to life - sounds buzzing and voices echoing (albeit muffled) as the screen panned from looking at the floor - to the sky, the the floor again. Then - a face came on screen.
A very familiar one - but… a hell of a lot younger.
“Wait… is that -?” Nobara asks.
“Shoko-sensei?!” Yuuji exclaims.
“That’s kinda how she looked when I was a kid. She’s in her uniform, so this must be when she was in school.” Megumi adds.
The camera pulls away from the close up on her face as another figure enters the shot - a man with odd bangs, silky black hair tied up into a bun and piercing dark eyes. He had a lazy smile in his face as he looked into the camera, poking a finger into Shoko’s cheek.
“What the fuck, Suguru?!” She says as she flicks his hand away.
“That’s - that’s Geto Suguru.” Megumi says. Geto had always been a bittersweet topic in their house, only getting worse in the last year and a half since… since he died.
The next action causes a gasp to echo across the room. A smiling face pops up between both figures.
Dark, circular sunglasses perched on a slim, pale nose and a wide, toothy, cheeky smile sat under a mop of shocking white, messy hair.
“Holy shit! That’s -” Yuuji starts.
“Dad.” Megumi whispers, seeing Satoru so young, probably around his age was amazing to him.
“Wow! It’s working! Is it on? Is it filming?” 16 year old Gojo says, voice eerily familiar, but much younger.
The three faces were all staring into the lens of the camera, only visible from the shoulders up. On screen, Shoko looked down and moved her arm and another head popped up from the bottom of the screen, trying to squeeze in.
The head of H/C hair and shiny eyes wiggled their way into the shot between Suguru and Shoko, and under Satoru.
“Did you say it’s on? It on recording right now?” The new figure pokes the camera.
“No fucking way… Fushiguro! That’s -” Nobara says, swirling to look at the taller boy.
“My mom.” He says, eyes fixed on screen. Your face was younger, hair the same as ever, eyes still full of excitement and curiosity and voice slightly higher than it is now. A hand pats the top of your head, a pale one - Satoru.
“Do a dance for the camera, Y/N.” Satoru says, smiling.
And you do a little wiggle in your spot squeezed between everyone as the other three burst out laughing.
The camera cuts off, and the screen changes to a view of the outside - all of them immediately recognising the training field.
In view is Geto and Gojo, sparring at such a ridiculously quick speed it’s barely visible. He could hear giggling behind the screen and recognised the voices of you and Shoko laughing about something that happened in class.
“They’re such show offs.” Your voice says.
“Geto genuinely wants to train, Gojo is just trying to impress you.” Shoko says, voice muffled by something - which he later sees as a lollipop, figuring it out when it gets launched across the field - presumably in retaliation for her comment by you.
“No way, Koko! That’s just dumb, he’s just a show off in general.” Your voice echoes.
“Whatever you say, Y/N.”
The camera cuts off again. The next thing they see is the night sky, and raucous laughter. The camera is being held by Shoko again, and she points it to a view of a rooftop - the flat part of the roof of the dorm building. The camera turns to one Suguru Geto, eyes hazy and smile even more languid than normal. In his hand was a smoking object - which he passed to Shoko.
They were both laughing together about Shoko saying she could see a constellation shaped like a penis, and the hysterical giggles and she rested her head on the boys shoulder told them that the joint in Shoko’s hand was very much affecting them.
There were clambering sounds.
“I can’t reach!” Came your voice, distant and off screen.
“C’mere shortstack, I’ll give you a boost.” The teasing lilt of Gojo’s voice came after.
“Thanks, Jack the Beanstalk.” Your retort sent the two original stars into another round of laughter before you and Gojo enter the frame, both holding a plastic bag of snacks.
Shoko gives you the joint as you sit, and you take a quick puff and pass it back to Suguru. Satoru declines it, saying it makes his eyes feel funny to which you all nod and say ‘makes sense’.
“Did you get me spicy chips?” Suguru asks, combing through the bags.
“Yes. But - you had to tell me you love me to get them.” Satoru says, smirking.
“Gojo Satoru - you are the light of my life, the centre of my world, the reason my heart beats, please, May I have my child you absolute fuckwad.” He says, as Satoru throws his head back laughing and throws a red bag of chips at him before tackling him to the ground demanding a kiss.
You laugh at the scene, turning to Shoko.
“See - that’s how Geto has at least one date every weekend.” You say, opening your chocolate.
“Man-whore.” She responds, sucking on a lollipop.
The screen flashes black. The same view is on the screen, but the atmosphere is much calmer. Suguru lay, head on Shoko’s lap and her deft fingers carding through his hair as he listens to whatever nonsense Gojo is spouting. The camera turns to a view that has Nobara and Yuuji cooing. Satoru is sitting, arm around your back to keep you upright with your head on his shoulder, eyes closed and clearly sleeping.
Suguru’s voice whispers into the camera.
“And these two say they’re not into each other.” Followed by a scoff from Shoko.
Next up is a view of the training field again, with a sight that made the three current first years laugh. Suguru was laying on the grass, and he was bench pressing you - his makeshift weight - as you lay relaxed horizontally reading a book, the casual nature made it clear this was a daily occurrence.
Once his reps are finished, he gently lets you down and you don’t even react, just laying on the grass continuing your book. He stands up and waves to Shoko, who he’s just noticed with her camera and proceeds to take off his shirt and let down his hair.
“Put your damn shirt back on!” Shoko shouts.
“God damn, maybe I should be a curse user.” Nobara utters, whistling and fanning herself.
The camera is next held up by Satoru - who smiles and puts a finger to his lips to symbolise silence, for some reason, like the camera would be unexpectedly loud. He turns the camera and in the backseat of a car is Shoko and you, both asleep and earphones split between you with a bright pink iPod on Shoko’s lap. Her head was resting in the crook of your neck, and you cheek rested on top of your head.
“They really have always been best friends, haven’t they?” Yuuji says. Megumi is reminded of last week, when Nobara and Yuuji fell asleep in the back of Ijichi’s car, in the exact same position.
The camera operator is back to Shoko now, who is filming the most beautiful scenery. Sakura petals are drifting through the air as throngs of people wander around what appears to be a festival. There’s food stalls and trinket stands and everyone around is in their finery.
“Suguru! Show the camera your best pose.” Shoko says, as Suguru appears on screen decked out in a black and grey kimono with his hair in a half up, half down style.
He throws a peace sign at the camera and then takes it so he can film Shoko who’s in a pretty red Yukata pattered with black and white koi. She smiles and then waves as she looks off camera.
“You’re late, Satoru. Where’s Y/N?” She says as Gojo comes on screen.
He’s wearing a dark blue and silver hakama which looks like it cost the same as a house, Suguru wolf whistles and Satoru pretends to fawn over him.
“She was having lunch with her mom, she’s probably going to be here - holy shit.” Satoru says, but cuts himself off halfway as his jaw drops open.
The camera pans messily as Suguru turns to where Satoru is looking.
You’re walking toward them, smile on your face and usually messy hair styled in a beautiful updo, make up making your skin glow in the afternoon sun. You were wearing a light pink, billowy, gauzy hanfu with tiny pale green flowers and leaves around the edges. You did truly look incredibly stunning. You had a little bag in your hand, and the camera flew back to look at Satoru who was gaping at your approaching figure. His usually pale skin flushed with a pink dusting.
His mouth moves, and it seems unconscious when he whispers to himself.
“Beautiful…”
You walk into the frame, smiling brightly and hugging Shoko and then freezing when you see Satoru, eyes widening at the strikingly handsome figure he makes, every inch a fairytale Prince. The pink on your cheek matches your outfit as you stammer out a breathy,
“Hi, Satoru.”
“Hey, Y/N.” He says, mouthing opening and closing as you look at him through fluttering lashes.
There’s a jolt as it seems Suguru holding the camera elbows his best friend and whispers in his ear, just audible to the camera.
“Bro, tell her she looks beautiful, damn it.”
“You… you look um - beautiful, Y/N.” He stammers out, and the three first years watching laugh at how their oh-so-smooth sensei was once such a mess he needed prompting to flirt from his friends.
You flush even deeper.
“Thank you, Satoru. You look really good too. The um… the blue really suits you. The restaurant I had lunch with my mom had Sakura mochi, so I - I got you some.” You say as you shove a small nicely wrapped box at him and Satoru seems to melt. Shoko appears on screen, making a circle with one hand and poking a finger through it repeatedly in a very lewd gesture that has Suguru cackling.
“Wait - they’re not even together yet. They didn’t get together until the end of their second year.” Megumi muses, smirking.
“So they’ve always been this whipped for each other.” Nobara laughs.
The DVD ends there, and Yuuji jumps up to put in the next one, labelled ‘second year’.
The video begins with you sprinting toward Shoko and her catching you in her arms.
“I missed you so much! A whole summer without you, it was torture. How was the medical camp?” You ask her, barely taking a breath between words.
“Did you not miss me, lil’ lady?” Came a smooth voice as one Geto Suguru wraps his arms around you too, and you squeal in excitement. The three standing are then abruptly tackled to the ground as a blur of white and black whizzes toward them.
“Satoru!” Came three scolding voices.
“How the fuck did you do that, you lanky - oh.” Shoko is stopped abruptly as they all stand up and the change in Satoru is clearly visible. Long gone is the beanstalk boy of their first year, all arms and legs at 16 and now at almost 18 - a broad shouldered, 6ft 3, sharper jawline and longer hair Gojo stands before them. You look like you might faint.
The video stops and then resumes looking at a very familiar blackboard, and a much younger Yaga beside it.
In front of the blackboard there’s two students in Jujutsu High uniforms - both in party hats and standing under a banners with ‘Welcome First Years!’ written in big bubble writing on it, the sounds of streamers and party poppers came through the room as the camera was set down on a desk.
Gojo comes on screen and waves his arms as if to show off the two students. One looked incredibly happy, a beaming smile full of excitement and the other looking absolutely miserable, but given how painfully 2005 emo he looked - it wasn’t surprising. Megumi smirked, seeing the blond boy on screen and knowing exactly who it was from photo albums you kept - but he waited to see when the other two would notice.
“Welcome to Yu Haibara! Please - introduce yourself!” Gojo says, pointing a bottle of cola at him like a microphone.
“Hi! I’m Yu! I’m 16 and I like rice and people!” He says, voice full of enthusiasm.
“Thank you! Next up, Gerard Way!” Satoru smiles and point the mock microphone to the other boy.
“Do I have to? This feels unnecessary.” He says, grimacing.
“Yes! You do!”
“Fine. My name is Nanami Kento -”
Megumi didn’t hear the rest of the sentence as a chorus of ‘What the fuck!?’ Echoes from the two beside him.
“Nobara, rewind that - I think I heard it wrong, I thought the emo kid said his name was Nanami, hah!” Yuuji exclaims.
“No need. You heard right.” Megumi smirks.
“No fucking way! That’s Nanamin?!” Yuuji is smiling so wide at the sight of his mentor as a moody teen.
“Yup. I remember his hair like that, he had a lip ring and a nose ring too. Geto Suguru pierced his nose with Shoko’s med kit for him when they drank too much whiskey at my mom’s 18th. There’s a picture of them doing it framed in their room at home.” Megumi scoffs a laugh, the other two in shock at the revelation.
The camera stops again and next time is looking from an upstairs window as voices whisper.
“What is she doing?” Shoko asks.
“It looks like she’s talking?” Geto asks.
“There’s a tiny spike in her cursed energy - wait, I’ll try see if there’s someone around.” He says and the clink of his sunglasses hitting the windowsill breaks the quiet.
On screen, there’s you in a pair of fluffy blue pyjamas and a winter knitted hat as you seem to be kneeling and ushering something small out of a bush. Satoru seems to have gotten distracted and the camera pans to him - who’s just staring out the window with the most dopey, lovestruck smile on his face.
“Satoru.” Suguru says, flicking his ear.
He snarls, but blushes.
“I - I can’t tell but, it kinda seems like? She is trying to talk to something.” He says, as they all crane their necks as you pull something into your arms and stand up, taking off your hat and tucking whatever you found into it and scurrying back inside.
An obnoxious ringtone of crazy frog blasts through the room and Satoru flips open his phone and answers it.
Since it’s you, he puts it on speaker.
“Hey, Satoru - are you still at the store? I - kinda need something, urgently.” Your voice asks.
“Eh - yeah, I’m at the store. What do you need?” He says, trying to hush the two sniggering traitors beside him who are fully aware that he came back from the store an hour ago and is sitting in Suguru’s dorm with them.
“I - um, I need kitten milk.” Your voice says, just as the camera cuts off.
The next few videos are just videos on videos on you and a tiny, tiny kitten, feeding it from a small bottle and it sleeping on your chest, or Satoru playing with it and a ball of wool in hysterical laughter. One video is taken by Shoko with Suguru in the frame playing with the kitten who is trying to catch his bangs and on the sofa, is you sitting on Satoru’s lap, as he looks at you adoringly and you giggle and place a kiss on his lips. Given that it’s about 3/4 of the way through your second year, it means you’re freshly together after torturing your friends with mutual pining.
Megumi looks closer at the kitten, and the tabby is very recognisable to him - given that to this day, the hairs of that kitten, now 13 years old and still thriving due to your unwavering spoiling, still decorate any black fabric in your home.
“Is that baby grumpy George?!” Nobara asks, hitting the nail on the head.
The video fades again, and then the screen is illuminated by a makeshift stage in the school sports hall. Another large banner is on the wall, with ‘Talent Show’ written in large writing, Megumi now noticed the big bubble writing was the same as had been on every ‘happy birthday’ banner he’d had every year.
The announcer, he recognises as a smiling principal Yaga - even though this is surely not a school organised or endorsed event, but probably the work of the couple he now calls his parents.
“Welcome to Jujutsu Talent Show! The rules of tonight are as follows a) no cursed techniques or cursed energy and absolutely no sabotaging! Panda! Do you want to say who’s going first?” Yaga announced as he lifts up a baby panda and the voice of the baby says “Nanami and Yu!”.
Yu skips on stage, decked out in a cape patterned with stars and a large top hat, followed by a very sullen Nanami Kento, adorned with a nose and lip ring now.
“Ladies, gentlemen, cursed corpses! My name is Yu the Magic Man and this is my assistant, the Fantastical Nanamin! Does anyone here like rabbits?” He announced, and takes off his hat, revealing a stuffed rabbit on his head - commencing the world’s worst magic show. The highlight was definitely Yu asking Nanami to pull the scarf from his sleeve and after pulling and pulling and pulling, a very frustrated Kento growls ‘Fucking hell, Yu - how long is this thing?’ Completely breaking what little mysticism surrounded the performance. Geto didn’t help, when he muttered ‘that’s what she said’ after Nanami’s complaint, setting the second years off.
After a bow to his rapt audience, and lots of cheering and supportive clapping from you all - the first years leave and Yaga announces the next performance.
A loud bang echoes through the room,
“Holy shit!” Your voice, the 28 year old you, carries through the room as three heads spin around to see their sensei’s back, arms supporting the thighs around his waist, belonging to his wife who’s lipstick is smudged across her cheek and her husband’s face. The white haired man’s white shirt was partially unbuttoned and your sweater had fallen completely off you shoulder - combined with the position you entered the room and the ruined cosmetics it was quite clear why the teachers had stumbled into this forgotten room of jujutsu tech.
“Get a fucking room.” Megumi grumbles.
“We were! But you’re here! And just for that I’m gonna tell you that the sofa you’re sitting on was where Akio was conceived.” Gojo retorts, trying to fix himself as all the kids groan.
“Both of you, hush. ‘Toru - look at the screen.” You were transfixed on the paused screen.
“Wait! Is that - that’s our talent show! From second year! Where did you guys find this?” Satoru says, leaping over the back of the sofa and plopping down but not before turning around and picking you up by the waist and sitting you in his lap.
“I thought all the DVD’s were lost! Koko couldn’t find them after we graduated!” You say, as you keep staring at the screen.
“We were clearing out the storage room, like Ijichi asked and we found a funky box with DVD’s in it.” Yuuji says.
“Oh my god! Press play!” You say, clapping.
“Look at angry Nanamin!” Gojo says, smiling.
“Next up is Y/N and Shoko!” Screen Yaga announces.
You and Shoko are dressed in the most colourful outfits ever, you’re beaming and Shoko looks exhausted. Large headbands, crimped hair, tutu skirts, leggings, neon leg warmers and beads were the costume of choice as Geto stood on one side of the stage.
“Welcome to - Y/N and Shoko’s dance bonanza!” You both say, and Geto presses play so that Girl’s Just Wanna Have Fun plays to match the 80s Cyndi Lauper style outfits. Having danced ballet as a little girl, and being a big fan of Just Dance and Dance Dance Revolution - you decided that you and Shoko would do this for the show, exhausted and unenthusiastic - but endlessly loyal to her best friend and determined to not let Gojo win the show. You guys danced a perfectly in sync routine with 28 year old you shouting ‘Oh my god, I still remember the routine!’ Halfway through. Yuuji was hopping along on the sofa beside Megumi.
Before Shoko could collapse into a heap as the song finished, she was thrown over Suguru’s shoulder and hauled off stage with Gojo doing the same for you.
After a brief intermission, Geto and Gojo were welcomed on stage in matching black tuxedo’s, off camera your voice could be heard saying ‘ugh, I’m gonna climb that man like a tree later, suits are the best.’
“Ladies, gents - tonight welcome to The GS squared stand up comedy show, enjoy your night and Geto’s number is available after the show.” Gojo drawls into the mic.
Megumi didn’t expect the routine to be as funny as it was, everyone especially enjoyed the part where they did impressions of different Jujutsu Elders, including Naobito Zen’in and Principal Gakuganji - which were unnervingly accurate but highly offensive to them, especially when Gojo got on his knees to imitate how short the elder Kyoto principal was and Geto kept playing Looney Tunes on the projector to show Naobito’s ‘cursed technique’.
When the audience were thoroughly hysterically laughing, with the audience being Yaga, MeiMei, Panda, Y/N, Shoko, Yu, Kento and Utahime who was visiting Shoko for the weekend, the boys bowed, winked and walked off stage and the camera caught Gojo bending down to whisper something in his ear which had you looking at the sky and blushing - still getting used to openly loving each other.
The voting wasn’t recorded, but the winners announcement was and it was shown to be Yu and Nanami - who everyone, except for themselves had voted for.
“Oh my god, these are priceless! I can’t believe I got even funnier with age, and look at your cute little outfit, princess!” Satoru coos.
“There’s a whole box of them, we’ve only watched 2!” Yuuji says, bouncing and handing the box to you and Satoru.
“No way, it’s the whole box! I remember decorating it with Koko! Hold on, I’m gonna ring her to come here.” You say as you take out your phone, smiling at the lockscreen of Satoru, Megumi and your 6 month old son and pulling up Shoko’s contact to ring her to ‘get her ass down here for a surprise’.
“Oh, ‘toru! I bet our DVD of our trip together to Fiji in the summer of third year, Shoko lent us her came for it!” You say, wrapping your arms around him and settling in while Yuuji loads the next DVD.
“Classes are cancelled, I’ve decided it’s home movie day - do we have any popcorn?” Satoru says, smiling at how fondly Megumi is looking at the screen, a still pause screen of himself and you smiling in the training yard together - still looking as lovingly at each other 13 years later. Yuuji has his arm wrapped and Megumi’s shoulders and is leaning into him, as the dark haired boy rubs circles on his boyfriend’s knee - Nobara has her legs stretched across the laps of both boys as the newest video begins.
The door swings open, Shoko entering -
“No fucking way! You found them! Kids, move up - let Aunty Koko sit.” She says, plopping herself between the arm and her two best friends, her nephew and their bonus kids.
She’s glad she bought that camera.
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vaxxman · 7 days
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Could I request Medic having The Mom Grip on Scout’s shoulder after the speedy moron almost let a mercenary secret slip while they weee getting groceries?
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Three Europeans and two Americans walk into a grocery store in New Mexico.
I hope this is the right meme.
More silliness below.
This comic is the antithesis of the "wtf is a kilometre" joke.
The faces they make when they can't quite identify the type of brown bread in the bread aisle.
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You don't know how [insert nationality here] you are until you go overseas and things are different.
Spy obviously has no problems with pretending to know how much a gallon of milk is, he just peeks into his conversion chart notes, pretending it's his shopping list.
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I want to think Heavy is completely fine with having to readjust to a new unit system, he just eyeballs most practical things anyways by holding them up and mumbling about how they approximately weigh like a chicken or his kettle bell etc. He's always been living in practical ignorant bliss.
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Medic has a peer reviewed meltdown the first time he realises there's no uniformity in "a cup of ____" because every object has different densities. He's diligent about memorising the conversion rates for ounces, pounds, the most common things etc., and recovers ok. He goes through the same stages of grief rage when he finds out about distances and lengths.
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Just remember four inches are 10.16 cm and pray no one asks you to specify anything bigger than inches.
Everyone does a mental victory lap when they manage to guess how much Celsius the weather is because they keep forgetting it's Celsius*5/9+32=Fahrenheit, Engineer reminds them patiently.
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The true victories are the correct temperature guesses we've made along the way.
One time, a friend asked me if I actually knew how much a tablespoon of flour was in gramms to convince me that metric users also make use of volume based units without thinking about them. But little did she know a heaped spoonful of 405 flour is about 15g and a level tablespoon is 10g.
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They claim Oolong just tastes better when it's boiled to 80°C exactly with a Bunsen burner.
You only asked for one scene but somehow I came up with a bunch of other things. This post was drawn across 2 months so the artstyle is all over the place. Thanks for your ask!
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minamorris1857 · 8 months
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Random friend: Helen Pevensie, your children are just so well behaved and mature. I can’t imagine having children who act as nicely as yours do.
“Pile on Pete!” Lucy yells and they all jump onto Peter who grunts and grumbles but doesn’t push them off.
Peter and Edmund hitting each other with sticks in the back garden
Susan and Peter telling Edmund to eat his vegetables and him telling them that he’s an adult and he will eat his vegetables when he wants to. And to back off.
Lucy climbing a tree in her nice clothes because “I’m really good mum don’t worry it’s like the trees taught me”
Susan sneaking back inside at midnight with an empty quiver and bow. “I can explain”
Peter and Edmund routinely leaving school grounds on weekends to see Lucy and Susan at their own school.
Lucy spending more time with girls twice her age than other 10 year olds.
Edmund always sneaking away from the children’s section in the library and getting books on gory battles and great military failures.
Peter getting in fights over stepped on toes.
Lucy fighting bedtime every chance she gets.
All of them accidentally drinking wine on more than one occasion because they saw the glass and didn’t think about where they were.
Lucy somehow knowing how to punch.
Edmund ‘borrowing’ a horse from the school coach house to go riding over the weekend while he was bored.
Susan always spilling flour over the kitchen when she’s tasked with dinner and Peter can’t do dishes without soaking everyone in the kitchen.
All of them being terrible about cleaning up after themselves because they got so used to having staff to do those sorts of things.
Lucy forgetting electricity is a thing and taking candles to read in the dark, which half terrifies her parents. She gets lots of playing with fire lectures.
Edmund and Lucy releasing all of their cousin’s science project subjects.
All four of them routinely covered in mud and brambles from the woods.
“Yes, I’m not sure how they all got to be like this,” Mrs. Pevensie laughs awkwardly. “It certainly wasn’t me.”
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