Mario kept reminding me of someone and I couldn’t figure out who until it suddenly hit me.

I can’t believe I’ve been both a fan of Mario and Asterix for years and had never noticed the similarities before. Shame on me. xD

My thoughts on Sanuso's children!!

I recently got a Tumblr ask (I'll edit this later and write the link) that talked about Sanuso adopting a child, and it has opened my eyes to make this whole post about the three children I think they'd have!! (Also shout out to @latinokokonoi for the idea of Zolu's daughter).

The Strawhats are still together after finding the One Piece, being together still and enjoying their own dreams for a while without separating yet (honestly, with how fast this story is going they're gonna find the One Piece quickly af, just pretend they've already found it). Sanji and Usopp are 25/23 when they have their two twin daughters (accidentally. Because they are idiots and did NOT listen to Chopper's talk about protection). Even if they weren't planned they're still extremely excited to form a family together! They're a bit worried about what will happen from now on, but they've taken care of children before on their adventures, so how hard can it be? The answer is pretty fucking hard but, you know, it's not like they don't have other children in the crew (Zoro and Luffy found a 2 y/o in a treasure chest when they were 23/21 and they've been taking care of her for two years now. Called her Kuina!). They believe they'll be just fine.

The girls are named after their moms, Sora and Banchina, and they're Usopp and Sanji's little princesses. They instantly get along with Kuina, by the way, as they grow up together. She kind of acts like an older sister to them, being 4 years older and all. If anybody asks, they're cousins! I won't go into much detail about Kuina here because this is about Sanuso's children, but I love the idea I have of her already.

The thing is, the girls grow up to be brilliant and also a menace. They're twins but you can easily tell who's who when they're not together!

Sora: Oldest sister for, like, two seconds and she's always reminding everyone about that (in a good way. She takes pride in protecting her sister). She has Sanji's morals and ambition. She's passionate and pretty intense when it comes to protecting the ones she loves. But also she's an adventurer like Usopp! She loves getting into trouble, too, and she's strategic enough to know how to come out of them (most of the time. Well- Sometimes. Most of the time Kuina is the one saving her ass. But, you know, at the end of the day Kuina gets lost and Sora is the one to find her... They make a pretty good team). She dreams of being a pirate and having her own crew someday with Banchina. She's a natural dreamer. A bit idealistic. She has Sanji's smile and Usopp's skills. She wants to learn how to fight in every damn way. She asks Sanji to teach her how to fight with her legs and Usopp to use the slingshot (prefers Sanji's method, tho). She often trains with Kuina, too! She reminds people of Nami (that's, like, her favorite crew member if you ask her. That's her auntie!) because of her mischievous personality and ability to steal. She's also very impulsive because she has Usopp's sense of adventure but Sanji's inability to back down. So... Yeah. Luffy fucking loves her. But at least she's good at strategies! She would do anything for her sister and has been by her side forever. Often asks her to join her shenanigans and schemes and that's when Banchina is a bit more playful! Loves Sanji's cooking and eats almost just as much as Luffy. She talks about Usopp's stories, being so so proud of being his daughter! Her favorite aunt is Nami and her favorite uncles are Luffy and Zoro.

Banchina: The sweetest of the two sisters. She's pretty much like their mothers, personality wise. She's a cutie pie. She loves cooking and drawing because she grew up watching her fathers doing these mundane, more domestic and calm activities. If Sora is the clumsy more adventurous one, Banchina is the caretaker who's just done with her sister's bullshit but loves her a lot. She has Sanji's need to help and Usopp's anxiety (but not in a really nervous way. More in a careful, thoughtful way). It's not that she doesn't know how to defend herself, but she uses her slingshot only when needed and to back up her sister. She's more of a support person! She loves to cook but prefers to draw. Spends the day drawing. Kuina and Sora are very protective of her but she's usually the one who ends up rolling her eyes and taking care of them when they get injured somehow. However, she can be very playful too when Sora manages to get her in her schemes and shenanigans. She's a sweetheart but she protects her family when she needs to do so. She prefers more calm spaces but she appreciates the company of her sister and Kuina, finds them amusing. Basically, calm and helpful, very done with the chaos but secretly loves it, and ends up playing around when she finds it funny. Her favorite aunt is Robin (they spend time together reading and drawing) and her favorite uncles are Jinbe and Brook.

They grow up together and somehow they're not only the crew's most precious treasure, but also they're very helpful when they fight. I mean, they don't usually let them fight, but they always end up helping without being asked.

They're 10 and 14 when they find Takumi (Sanuso is 35/33, if you're curious) on a boat, fainted, and very very injured. The kid appears to be around 7 and he has chains on his arms and a metal collar around his neck. That doesn't sit right with any of them, so the kids call Luffy and the others and they instantly help him to get into the ship.

Long story short, they take care of him for a day or so, extremely worried about his well-being. Sanji and Chopper look after him until he wakes up. The thing is, the kid wakes up when he's alone with Sanji, and he's instantly frightened. Sanji promises they're not going to do anything to him, but the kid is only begging him to not bring him back to where he was. Anything but that. Sanji is- Well, saying he's worried would be an understatement. When everyone goes to see him, he doesn't want to tell them anything. For some reason he grows attached to Sanji and won't let go of him, apparently, and he refuses to tell anybody what happened to him. However, Luffy offers him to break his chains and Takumi hesitates but obviously says yes. When Luffy does so, he just smiles widely at the sight of Takumi's relief and says: "See? Much better now, isn't it?" And Takumi stares at him and whispers "You look..." Luffy only tilts his head, confused, and Takumi blushes shyly. "I just- You look like someone I know." And he tightens his grip inside the pockets of his hoodie, holding something they can't see but don't ask about either.

Basically, they take care of the kid but he isn't quite ready to socialize yet and his injuries are still bad. The only ones allowed to spend a long time with him are Chopper (he's looking after his wounds) and Sanji (brings him food and, well, he's apparently the only one Takumi is comfortable with enough to talk. Besides, Takumi apparently won't eat any meat or fish and he doesn't explain why, but Sanji makes new dishes for him gladly). The three girls want to know him better, but they're forbidden from bothering him (although they definitely sneak out to talk to him for a few seconds when the adults are busy).

Sanji sees a lot of himself in him. The scared eyes. The trembling voice. He's even blond, for God's sake. He spends a lot of time with the kid, and Takumi even asks him to sleep next to him most of the time. Usopp sees this and he just knows they're keeping him because now there's no way they can say goodbye to him. One day, Takumi has a very nasty panic attack and Sanji has to help him through it. When the kid asks how he knows to deal with this, Sanji thinks it's only fair to open up to him about some stuff about his own past. This makes Takumi open up too, finally explaining what happened to him:

Takumi's mom is a celestial dragon that cheated on her husband with a slave. Of course, this didn't go unnoticed and she died in an "accident" while the slave was brutally murdered (when you think Celestial Dragons can be worse, they- They just get worse). The man didn't even give Takumi a name, he just took the kid and made him a slave the second he could start working. That's all he's ever known. Long story short, he's locked in a cell for a while as a punishment along with some other slaves, thinking there's no hope. But there's always hope, because the revolutionary army suddenly shows up! Sabo frees all of the slaves from that cell, Koala leading them to their respective boats. But... There's a kid who won't move. Chained. Injured. It shatters Sabo's heart into a million pieces. Sabo tries to help him with reassuring words but the kid is visibly shaking. Sabo asks him his name, but the kid won't answer, to which Sabo just smiles and says: "Well! Isn't that just great? Now you can choose your own name!" and the little guy is all confused, but it's the first time there's true excitement in his eyes. "Really?" / "Really! Is there something you like a ton? A name you want to make yours?" The kid seems to think about it, a bit shy about his answer. "I want- I want to go to the sea." / "Oh! I come from there, actually. Is there something you want to do there?" / "It's dumb-" / "No dreams are dumb. Now tell me." / "I want to build things. Things that can help people! Like- Like machines but- But good ones. I dunno how to explain it..." / "Umm. Well. How about Takumi? You can write it however you want it can mean both sea and craftsman. Also an outstanding person. The person you'll become once you get out of here. How does that sound?" Takumi nods and takes the name as his, as long with Sabo's glasses. He says Takumi will use them way more than him one day.

However, there's a lot of chaos and Takumi gets lost in his boat. All alone. And ends up fainting in the middle of the sea until the Straw hats find him.

Sanji knows it will be too much for the little guy to tell him all he knows about this story, so he just comforts him and lets him rest for a few days until he's ready to come out of the room. He has dinner with the rest of them, finally, one day. And even though the three girls are curious about him they have a very calm dinner, respecting his space. That's when the crew does their presentations, Luffy being the last one... And of course, he says: "I'm Monkey D. Luffy! Captain of this ship and the king of the pirates!". Something inside of Takumi switches, a huge surprised smile decorating his face. "You are Sabo's brother! That's why you reminded me of him!" / "You know Sabo?". Takumi tells them about his story and shows them the glasses, saying he's worried about Sabo because he promised to take care of him and he's sure the blond blames himself for this. He tells them, also, about Sabo talking about Luffy ("The world is scary out there, but pirates aren't all so bad, all right? Monkey D. Luffy is my brother! The king of the pirates! And he's the best man I've ever met.") and Takumi couldn't be happier to have found him.

Basically, Takumi stays with them for a long time and grows closer and closer with everyone. The girls and he get along, even if he's still very overwhelmed by everything and has to take things slow. They protect him when there's a fight and they spend time with him, playing and teaching him everything there's to know. He also sleeps with Sanji and Usopp most of the time, also growing very fond of the sniper and his stories late at night when he has nightmares and refuses to wake up Sanji. Usopp is always there to distract him from bad thoughts and Sanji is always there to hug the anxiousness away. Sora and Banchina love him like a brother, so much that they even start calling him that. Sanji and Usopp don't say a word about it, but it hurts to know that there's a possibility of him not staying with them. Sanji says it's fine. That the kid deserves a better life. But Usopp knows Sanji wants the kid to stay with them.

Sabo appears one day with the intention to see Takumi again. They catch up and have a fun day together until Sabo offers Takumi the option of going away with him. However, Takumi says he prefers to stay here. With his new family, if they accept him. And so Takumi stays with them!

That's when his personality starts to form a little bit more with the passage of time. He loves spending time with Franky and Usopp, building things. Little machines and inventions. Turns out Sabo's glasses do end up being useful to him! He's still a bit shy. A very anxious kid. But he's so, so smart... A brilliant, outstanding kid who wants to make the world a better place with his inventions. He keeps being reserved and he isn't very fond of fighting, but he supports the whole crew with his inventions! Usopp couldn't be more proud. He also likes the revolutionary's ideology and lets Robin talk to him about it for hours and hours. Cooking is just like science, in his opinion, and once he says it Sanji's heart melts because that's exactly what Usopp told him once.

They end up figuring out that he ate a devil fruit, one that helps him talk to animals. That's why he refuses to eat them. Sanji tells him that it's amazing. One of the best powers in the world. Fascinating, even. He's his special boy and Sanji's just so jealous he has a power like that but he's glad Takumi is the one to have it and not some horrible pirate out there. Usopp and he grow closer talking about bugs and different types of beetles and arachnids! Sanji loves to see it, but can only talk about Takumi about it when it comes to regular animals.

They're so, so similar in a lot of things... Even if they are not his real parents. Yet. He hasn't called them that yet.

Until one morning Takumi calls Sanji dad and he has a whole crisis about it, the kid thinks he has killed his father but Usopp calms both of them down. Sanji asks the kid if he truly wants to be part of his family. Because if he does, he'd be glad to call him his son. And Takumi couldn't be happier. Do you know who's even happier? Sora and Banchina. They are THRILLED to have a little brother.

I've made these picrews based on the idea I have of them (if you like the idea I'll post more information about them):

Sora

Age: 10 (Older twin for literally seconds of difference)

MBTI: ENTP

-> She's an adventurer, hence the bandages and band-aids. Prefers long hair because she refuses to cut it, mostly. Uses Usopp's overalls and Sanji's shirts because they're comfortable and they don't fit her dads anymore, so she gets to keep them!!! She likes nature (the bees and her leaf earring) and loves stealing Zoro's money at poker (Nami taught her).

Banchina

Age: 10

MBTI: INFP

-> Usually has a ponytail or buns to keep them from bothering her while she draws. Lil' toad on her head (Wano Usopp reference, he kept that toad). She likes butterflies and bugs, too!! Big comfy clothes and a calmer, comfier energy.

Takumi

Age: 7

MBTI: INFJ

-> Lil' crown of leaves his sisters gift him. Animals around him all the time. He likes big clothes but usually just wears a synthetic leather jacket Usopp gave him and never takes off Sabo's goggles. Big sweaters, too. He's very tiny even for his age.

Kuina

Age: 14

MBTI: ESTP

-> Long hair for the same reason as Sora: Refuses to cut it. Bold of you to assume she showers, honestly. Lil' ponytail to see better. She has one of Zoro's earrings and a necklace with a sun (iykyk). She also has a bandana around her neck (Zoro moment). Have you seen her clothes? She wants to go to Wano so fucking bad.

Picrew

You can tell people who don't watch Niji are really scrambling to find anything to hate about the AR Live because they just don't want any of the livers to celebrate any accomplishments. But if anyone is actually taking the opinions of those who didn't even watch the damn event at face value, here is my take on some of the "issues" these people are complaining about:

Long read.

THE GRADUATED LIVERS:

Pomu's, Nina's, and Mysta's voice were kept because it was a decision by the livers to be included for the fans. The remaining livers re-recorded their live stages after the others graduated, but some people actually think Niji was just showing 1-year-old footage, which would take some insane editing skills. The graduated livers' voices were part of the back track, not as part of the live singing. Their vocals were only heard for debut songs, too. There is also a weird narrative that the voices of the graduated livers should not have been allowed when there is no problem with it. Those graduated livers still support their friends and were more than happy to be included in AR Live even after graduating.

SELEN AND PASTEL STAGE:

It makes sense why Selen had to be cut from AR Live. There would be a lot more heat if they kept her in after her termination than to just roll with it since, unlike the graduated livers, Selen was terminated not long after already recording AR Live back in November last year.

I get it's upsetting many things had to be cut from Pastel Stage, but it's not just getting all the livers to Japan, but also booking the venue, getting the 3D riggers, stage staff, choreographers, and more. They'd have to push the AR Live concert even further after canceling the initial one. It honestly makes sense that they'd cut content rather than spend the resources to re-record it for a THIRD time. And since everyone wants the Niji to take better care of their livers' mental health, then not overworking them on this overdue project is a start.

3D MODELS AND RIGGING:

Apparently, someone paid the money to hate-watch AR Live so they could spread screenshots to make it look bad, despite the strict copyright rule not to share screenshots (which of course would lead to a DMCA). Frankly, if anyone is going to judge the quality of the whole 3-hour concert based on snippets and not actually bother to watch it, then they can't make the conclusion that the 3D models were bad. Although it's weird that someone did pay to sit through a 3-hour concert without having any intention of enjoying it to begin with.

I watched the concert, and the 3D models looked good, in my opinion. Nijisanji is known to have better 3D rigging compared to their competitors. The team that did the models and rigging did a perfectly fine job and it's pretty insulting to put it down because you chose to look at it under a microscope and pinpoint any instance where it might have looked off. A lot of the choreography (especially Shu's Shanti 🪑) and the variety games show how good the rigging can look, and it seems unfair to not look at those examples alongside the bad ones.

CONCLUSION

I feel like the Niji hate at this point is getting ridiculous. There's plenty of real reasons to not like Niji. If you want to "SiNk tHe yAtCht" so bad, you can boycott it and not spend money to hate-watch their concert, lol. Drama channels finding anything to talk about AR Live when they haven't even watched it is just another example of how little integrity they have to report hearsay. And it's tiring to always hear people looking at any possible negative thing to say when the livers and their fans are just being happy..?

Don't get me wrong, I have my criticisms of the company. I've aired it out before. Especially after Selen's termination. Hell, it's not like I don't have my own critique of AR Live. I also wish fans got more Pastel Stage. I also wish the first AR Live wasn't canceled. But by no means do I think the AR Live we got was bad.

I left the concert feeling elated and overall had way more positive thoughts about it than any negative ones. And it has me looking forward to future AR Live concerts. Other 3D debuts. And other projects like NijiEncounter.

Anyways, Niji antis can and will keep obsessively bitching about Niji, and then say "cope and seethe" when someone tells them to take a chill pill. But Niji AR Live did really well. The fans are proud of the livers' hard work to make it happen. There will be more positive things to come for Niji enjoyers. But if antis want to keep writing their own fan fiction that tells them otherwise, there's no point in changing their mind, lol.

For fans that want to keep supporting their livers, or any sane person that wants to see Niji better themselves, please don't let the hate keep you from celebrating any wins, big or small, that the livers are accomplishing.

David Alleyne has pretty much lost all of the original appeal he had as a character in his modern appearances which is so damn frustrating. Ultimately everything that he should be, that makes him such an amazing character who deserves a spot on the X-Men already, is stuff that hasn't been utilized in over a decade for him.

Prodigy originally and historically was:

An awkward nerd who gets picked on by many of his peers

A driven, motivated kid who's always thinking about his goals and his future

A kid who was raised in a politically knowledgeable loving home who knows how to point out bigotry in his peers and has no problem with it

An incredible tactician on the battlefield who's too good for his damn age group, an awkward leader of his team but a GOOD one

An overthinker, he spent weeks ignoring his crush because he felt guilty for something that DIDNT EVEN ACTUALLY HAPPEN and ended up coming off like an asshole to her

A protective older brother

He was never really "nice" tbh, he wasn't a fully blown asshole like say, Josh or Nori or Julian, but he definitely wasn't as nice as Jay. He could be rude if he thought the other person (*cough* Josh *cough*) deserved it. But in general he never really came off like a very emotional person, always kind of cold and tactical.

A mutant whose powers seem inherently non combatant in nature but actually grant him the ability to copy the fighting skills of every single person he's come in contact with, includining Mr Logan Wolverine himself, and Kitty Pryde who was trained by a ninja, even after he lost his powers he was still extremely useful in combat because he had all these skills at once!

He even managed to be a fucking leader of all the youth on Utopia as a depowered mutant!

But in these past few years he's been portrayed as this sort of nice, generic queer kid. and its really bland and in poor taste tbh I don't like it at all. I don't entirely want to blame YA volume 2 for this (though it absolutely had a hand in it) because he wasn't.... entirely like this yet, honestly I kind of want to blame Leah Williams tbh. But YA definiitely had a hand in it.

I really do like David and Tommy as a couple, unlike some of my friends, but the way it's been written so far really isn't how I see it happening for them at all, or how I think they are as a couple.

If David ever does end up on the X-Men, I really hope at least SOME of these old aspects of his character will be used, even if they stick with this new personality I really fucking hope they'd utilize his skill set properly because what's the point of having him on there if they're not going to? Lol.

In honour of yotsuba death day - how well (or how badly) do you think each of the other seven would have handled the death note had they been chosen by Rem instead of Higuchi?

GOOD QUESTION. i've pondered this some...

namikawa would... um... namikawa is a very composed person, but i think being approached by a literal shinigami would be so far outside the realm of probability in his life that he'd kind of dissociate his entire way through the interaction. none of this really shows externally, though; he comes off as pretty collected. although namikawa doesn't have any moral qualms with killing people for his own benefit, i think his ego would prevent him from just accepting the notebook. namikawa doesn't need to stoop to murder to achieve his goals, and this shinigami needs to know it, goddammit.

if he was under the impression that turning rem down would end in him dying, though, he'd just take it and use it for self-gain while he's at it. i want to say he'd do decently well, but then i remember "for someone to trace this back to us, they'd have to be a god"... he's definitely more reserved in his killing patterns than higuchi, but he still blackmails the police and tries to catch L. inevitably he gets too confident and gets himself arrested/killed, but he'd last longer than higuchi.

ooi would immediately accept the death note with no questions and use it for yotsuba's benefit, but i think he'd genuinely view it as a service to the company rather than selfish murder. he would last the longest out of any of the yotsubas simply because he's a combination of genuinely intelligent and maybe just slightly batshit, and that means that he'd be difficult to predict for a while. considering ooi directs the meetings, i don't think he'd stray that far from the group's plan of action in the manga proper, but when it comes to a confrontation between him and the L team, it's a wild ride. also, um, he's better with a gun than higuchi. there might be some casualties here. maybe someone even gets bombed, who knows!

mido would initially panic and then get herself under control enough to tell rem that she Does Not Want It. she at least knows that murder is bad, and besides, i don't think she'd be motivated enough to use it. she cares about personal advancement, sure, but not at this expense. if she felt threatened into it, she'd give it a shot, but i don't think she'd do much killing for self-benefit. she might start trying to take L out, but honestly i think she'd eventually break down and insist on giving rem the death note back.

takahashi would also panic when rem shows up. i don't even think he'd consider the possibility that he might be killed if he refuses, he'd just. give the damn thing back. rem would have to outright threaten to kill him to get him to do it (which i don't really think she'd do), and after that, i think he'd be too scared to use it on anyone who isn't a criminal. he'd turn himself in to the police in, like, two days. which... would make it significantly harder for light's plan to succeed... yay?

shimura would also panic and refuse to take it. if threatened, he'd just kill criminals, but he'd put some thought into how to evade L. if he kept going indefinitely, he honestly might be able to get away without getting caught just because he's so cautious and has no desire to kill L... but he just doesn't have it in him. he'd reach a breaking point, insist on giving it back to rem, and threaten to just kill himself if she doesn't take it.

kida would freak the fuck out but i think he'd ultimately take the death note. i think he'd use it for personal reasons, but not quite in the same way as higuchi did. namely, i think he'd kill mido out of petty spite (and have a bit of a crisis over it afterwards, but he makes himself keep going anyway). he'd be smart enough not to kill too many people who can be directly tied to him or yotsuba, but he'd still try to contact eraldo coil to investigate L, and we all know how that'd go. when he figures out that L is closing in, though, he probably decides to give the death note up. not that that saves him from arrest.

hatori insists that he's being pranked for a while, then figures out that rem is a real shinigami and sits there with his head in his hands for a minute or two. he very quickly copes by deciding that this is Cool And Fun, actually, and he can be like a superhero! he'd probably kill a few people for personal gain, but i think he'd see a few too many headlines about kira worshipers and start to get a little bit too into it... he goes through periods of despair where he thinks he's definitely going to get caught and die, and then he goes through periods of elation where he thinks he's really helping people and eventually everyone will realize that and love him.

he doesn't really do anything smart with it, and eventually i think he'd crack under the pressure and tell someone. shimura, maybe? or ooi? shimura would make him give it back to rem, and ooi would offer him counsel. which means he'd inevitably end up in charge of operations, so things would go similarly to the ooi option, except there's the possibility that ooi doesn't get caught and killed like hatori does. in which case... he probably just carries on with his life.

i should note that mido, takahashi, shimura, kida, and hatori all probably look like shit and act super on edge during their scenarios. lots of interpersonal drama probably ensues...

let it be known that i don't think rem would choose any of the other yotsubas, even if higuchi just didn't exist as an option. they're all pretty greedy, but not in the same outwardly scummy way. there are definitely worse people out there for rem to choose. there are also a lot of variables, so none of these are set in stone. definitely a fun hypothetical!

Not really a full review but just the thoughts at the forefront of my mind If they'd of just cut some horror references (Shining elevator especially) down into shorter scenes (it'd also work as an unobtrusive background element) AND made it easier to tell apart future and past characters that happen to be in the same scene together, this film would honestly be damn near perfect. It was still an enjoyable experience, though. Alot of scenes genuinely come close to freaking me out, like the respawn terminal failure. Having a fully voice acted cast and some custom models was a treat, i just don't see why some were custom and some were just Scout with a mustache slapped on. Plus, in the funeral scene, it's too noticeable how detailed Redmond and Blutarch are compared to everyone else in the room. I joked at one point that they blew the character budget on those two and couldn't afford to detail everyone else. The voice direction also felt lacking, with certain actors (excluding Scout's and Soldier's bc DAMN i actually asked a couple times if they got Rick, posthumously, and Nathan to do the voice work) focusing more on sounding as much as they could like the original mercs than the actual performance. Mind you i'm not saying they did a BAD job, they did after all do a fantastic job with the emotional line deliveries. Usually, you would complain about the cartoony art style of TF2 clashing with someone's high-end attempt to make the shots photorealistic or so, but since Fortress Films went to all the trouble of touching up everything with grit and keeping it consistent throughout scenes, it honestly works well even if non-TF2 models end up being used. The contrast actually fits. The plot...honestly, again, this is where i wish certain horror tropes got cut way down. Did we really need a whole scene of zombie mercs doing stereotypical zombie things? I don't even think it added anything to the plot, it just happened and was pretty easy to forget right after they're all killed. It's just how it never gets referenced again once it's over. I'm...also not really a fan of the shoehorned Christian imagery around the end. It's basically another trope and again it added pretty much nothing. It's also fun trying to figure out who can and can't actually die. This, ironically, might be the only thing from the zombie scene worth any salt, if the implication is RED mercs zombify after some time while BLU just infinitely respawns (Jules wouldn't be dead and therefore would not need saving if this were the case, which is inch resting) The attention to detail otherwise is fantastic. I keep finding parallels i didn't catch the first time. Along with shots that are legit drop-dead GORGEOUS, or even cutting-edge as far as cinematography goes and are incredibly rare to see in other SFM animations, the mo-cap is some of the best i've seen. It's rough sometimes and makes for some funny facial expressions, but when it works it WORKS. The theatrical feel is just...unmatched. You almost wonder if Valve themselves produced this because of how good the scenes look. I was also really impressed with the sound design, and also the fire and water effects, prominent throughout the film. Obviously, i think the film was really, really good, it's just that some parts feel like this project started as a shitpost animation, before getting stitched together with the parts where the team decided "no, we need to put actual effort into this". I also don't understand why, if the soundtrack is an original composition, the artist couldn't be credited anywhere. Anyway, go see Emesis Blue and come back with your own thoughts.

everyone's written their own version of "what if duncney DID make out during paintball deer hunter" and here is mine <3

"...You wanna make out?"

Courtney froze, stock-still. One look at the boy before her and she had a front-seat view of his toothy, stupid grin. His eyebrows waggled, smarmy, the disgusting metal rod wiggling up and down against his brow. 

"Do you honestly think," Courtney began, keeping her voice low and level so as not to explode at the entire ridiculous situation. "That I would ever want to kiss you? Especially in a situation like this?!"

Duncan shrugged, expression unchanging. "Hey, you never know. The Princess could have a secret wild side no one knows about. Plus, it'd be great TV. Think of the ratings."

"You sound like Chris," she sneered. "I'm here to win, ok? Not to mack on some gross delinquent."

"Hey, I'm here for the cash, too," Duncan said, and winked. "But I know a pretty girl when I see one. Even if she has a stick up her ass."

"I do not have a stick up my ass," Courtney retorted, and then - "Wait, do you actually think I'm pretty? Or are you just saying that to get ahead in the game?"

"Uh, in case you hadn't noticed, we're on the same team, Miss Priss." He leaned in closer, enough for Courtney to feel his breath fanning out against her face. Shockingly, it didn't smell terrible. "We're here. We're stuck. What else would you suggest to pass the time?"

Courtney closed her eyes so she wouldn't have to look at him. "Working on trying to get free from each other. Making our way back to camp. Finding someone to help us."

Duncan snorted. "Right. Because anything else would be too fun. God knows we couldn't have that."

She gasped, her eyes fluttering open again. She hardly noticed how near their faces were, how blue Duncan's eyes were, staring into her own. All she could do was splutter, "I'm fun! I'm so fun! People like me! I was a - "

"C.I.T.," he finished for her, glee lacing his tone. "And a boring one at that, obviously."

"Oh, I'll show you boring," Courtney snarled, her competitive edge winning out, and in one swift movement she had the stupid mohawked menace pressed up against the trunk of a tree with her lips on his.

It wasn't like Courtney was a stranger to dating. She'd had a long-term boyfriend through sophomore year, Romesh from Model UN, but things had ended after she'd made a case against the unfair taxing in his UK that was so strong, he burst into tears at the end. Romesh had been fun, but that suited Courtney just fine: if he couldn't keep up with her, she didn't want him.

Still, she'd always liked kissing Romesh. He was a good student, his glasses were super cute, and Mom had liked him because he was Indian like her. They'd had a good run as boyfriend-girlfriend throughout tenth grade. Courtney's prospects were clearly much higher than his. As much as she'd appreciated the innocence of her former first flame, Romesh was too similar to her. Somehow, that had never sat right in Courtney's gut.

But kissing Duncan had her feeling like she'd just stepped off a mammoth rollercoaster. Her stomach was floating somewhere near her chest, her blood was rushing like it had when she'd won that debate meet, all by herself. Duncan was an idiot, he was a criminal, but once Courtney started to kiss him, she didn't know how to stop. When she'd pushed him against the tree, he had made a surprised "oof!" sound, but it was only a matter of milliseconds before he was returning the favor with the same ferocity, fitting his hands around her hips.

When they finally broke apart for air, his blue, blue eyes were blown wide open. "Damn. Ok. Wow. Who'da thunk you'd be so feisty, Princess?"

"Maybe if you weren't such an animal," she seethed, and then his teeth were digging into her lower lip and she was letting it happen. Welcoming it, even, as she welcomed his tongue into her mouth. 

Desperately, she pushed all thoughts of her parents out of her head. They had to be horrified from where they were watching back at home, sitting atop the pristine white sofa cushions. She could only imagine the looks on their faces, as they watched her slobber all over this juvenile delinquent white boy punk.

Somehow, though, she didn't care.

The angle was slightly awkward, due to the antlers, but that didn't stop them. She plunged her hands into his hair, running her fingers over the buzzed sides, digging her nails into the mohawk. In retaliation, he tightened his hold on her waist, somehow pulling her even closer against his body. They were chest to chest, barely staying upright, and Courtney wanted to - she wanted to - she wanted - 

...Wait a minute.

With a loud shriek, she shoved him away from her, wrenching backwards herself. Despite the opposite motions, the damn deer antlers remained stuck as ever.

She had bigger things to worry about.

"I can't believe - you don't seriously think - I'm so not into you, Duncan!" She screwed her eyes shut and mimed puking. "Gross!"

"What the - What the hell happened to the hot babe I was just locking lips with in the middle of the woods?" He was staring at her with total incredulity, his mouth parted, still red and puffy from - DON'T YOU THINK ABOUT THAT, COURTNEY REYES!!!

"As if I actually liked any of that!" She retorted, in full grasp-at-as-many-straws-as-possible-before-admitting-defeat mode. "I just felt sorry for you! Surely no one's ever kissed a hairy beast like you before!"

Duncan laughed sarcastically, glaring at her. "You'd be surprised, Princess! It's not my fault you couldn't keep your antlers off me! What, no guy here with a pole up his butt to match yours that you can go all ga-ga over instead?"

"I'm here to win!" Courtney screeched, feeling a bit like a broken record. "And no guy is gonna stop me!"

"Ok, Crazy, if that's what you want, then fine!"

"Fine!"

Unfortunately, it was impossible to storm away from each other due to their current predicament. Even more unfortunate, Courtney found herself really wanting to say screw it and kiss him again.

What was happening to her?!

Chris's announcement over the loudspeakers that the challenge was finished stopped her train of thought before it managed to derail. Whatever had just gone down between her and Duncan, it hadn't been enough to get them caught by any of the hunters - they were both completely paint-free, and couldn't be blamed if the Killer Bass ended up losing.

"I guess we should get back to camp, then," she said stiffly, pointedly not meeting his eyes.

"Guess so." His mouth twisted into yet another devilish grin. "No goodbye kiss before we get goin'?"

"No. As far as anyone's concerned, nothing happened today." Shooting him a scowl, she added, "You got that?"

Duncan held his pinky out, still smirking. But something in the blue of his irises made Courtney feel suddenly breathless. "I promise, Princess."

Somehow, the curl of her finger around his felt even more intimate than the kissing had.

I know Cordovin banned the use of the word Harem how long did take for people to start using concubines instead. we both know once Neon heard Rouge say concubines she would start teasing Jaune about his whole team being his concubines which would be over heard and pass round the school like wild fire

Neon: C'mon Jaune! It's a compliment!

Jaune: It's embarrassing!

Neon: It's funny!

Jaune: It's misleading!

Neon: It makes you look like a player!

Jaune: It makes me look unavailable!

Neon: GAH! You're no fun! You take these things way too seriously, Blondie. When will you learn to loosen up and not take rumors so personally. It isn't the end of the world if someone says something bad about you.

Jaune: I KNOW THAT! I've been called names and have had rumors spread about me all the time. It just... hit's different when it's about my friends.

Neon: Huh? What does your friends have to with this?

Jaune: Sometimes when people joke about me having my own harem, they end up talking about either you, Reese, or May. And when they do... let's just say it isn't very PG.

Neon: Pfft, you get upset when people say dirty things about us?

Jaune: Honestly? Yeah, I do. They'd say pretty gnarly things about you guys that are just degrading. Kind of stuff I wouldn't stand for if I was hearing it about my own sisters. I get so ticked off hearing it that I have to stop myself from throwing a punch.

Neon: ...Jaune we've had this talk before. It's not worth getting upset over bullshit people say about me. This is the exact same as assholes saying stupid stuff because of me being a faunus. If I went ahead and punched a guy out every time I heard someone being racist, I'd constantly have to go to the doctors and order new knuckles. I may look soft and squeezable but this girl has tough skin Stud, besides I'm used to it, flows right off of me.

Jaune: *Sighs* Well I'm not used to it, and it sucks that you even have to be in the first place.

Neon: It's just how things are, there's always going to be assholes who just want to be shitty for no reason. But every once in a while, there'll be a sweet guy like you who just wants to be good because it's the right thing to do.

Jaune: *Looks at Neon for a second and smiles* You're right. Sorry I had to be such a downer again. You're the best concubine a guy can ask for.

Neon: *Loudly laughs* Damn right I am!

FUCK IT, SATELLITE INVESTORS HEADCANNONS!!!

CHARON

Can beat you to death with one of the pizza paddles. They've done it before and they'll do it again.

Any pronouns are fine with him!

Pretty chill all things considered, only really goes out of his way to hurt people if ordered to/he, the other investors, the Don, or any combination are threatened.

Honestly feels like he cares about the others too much sometimes

Probably the only guy who's keeping Kerberos from actually going completely feral.

Poly with Styx and Kerberos. Originally she was just with Kerberos but then he basically adopted Styx into the polycule and Charon was like "Oh FUCK yeah, 2 boyfriends"

Kind of the designated "adult" of the group for VERY OBVIOUS REASONS

The only one allowed to move Styx's wheelchair. Not sure HOW they got this privilege but they ain't complaining.

Works back in the Kitchen, she can make a damn good pizza from scratch

NIX

Soley uses They/Them.

Resting, "Are you fucking serious?" Face constantly

The kitchen could be on fire and they'd still be sipping their iced coffee like nothing was wrong, they're that jaded

They'd sell you to satan for a single corn chip if you managed to piss them off.

Really could give less of a shit about everyone there (unless it's Hydra, she's cool), they're just here for the money

I must reiterate that they do in fact enjoy Hydra's company. They really saw the feral gremlin and felt things again.

One of the best "persuaders" on the team. Just give them a baseball bat and 30 minutes. If that doesn't work they'll just get one of the biters

Rarely starts any conversations but once you get them talking? Oh you can NOT make them shut up until they're 100% done

Acts as a waiter during the day, but was that jaded before signing up for it.

She/Her user!

HYDRA

Will bite people for fun. No one knows why, she just likes doing it.

Styx's twin transistor!

Likes pissing off Kerberos for fun, but absolutely cannot deal with the usual outburst from this.

Cannot stand still for even a second, this girl is just constantly bouncing off the walls

Thinks Nix is just absolutely the COOLEST person out there! Likes to "persuade" people most when at their side.

CONSTANTLY cracking puns. Like every other sentence one gets dropped and it ALWAYS takes a moment for someone to figure out

Absolutely not subtle when getting information out of people. She will just very bluntly ask what she needs to know as the first interaction.

Also a waiter bc y'know, constantly moving table to table sometimes carrying things really takes the edge off

It/Its user, also transmasc

STYX

Hydra's twin brother!

Something went wrong with its legs a while back, is basically wheelchair bound unless walking a short distance

You touch the wheelchair and you're getting put in a wheelchair. (Unless you're Charon, but even then he needs explicit permission)

Absolutely a little shithead, and tends to use its disability to get out of shit it DEFINITELY caused.

The receptionist! It’s just the only one willing to keep that friendly facade up for that long.

The rest of the investors are rather protective of it. Not because of the disability, because of the fact that Kerberos and Hydra would both go on killing sprees if it's downed and frankly they're not sure any of them could "persuade" their way out of that.

Easily manipulates people but when it comes to asking things it deems "embarrassing" (like admitting it needs a hug) it will lie up and down that its FINE

LOVES being carried by others. No one knows why, it just does

Poly with Charon and Kerberos. Shortest guy with the 2 tallest guys!

KERBEROS

Well they mostly use he/him for him but they're pretty sure he doesn't care. They don't want to test their luck though

Dude has a lot of issues. Like you'd be hard pressed to find something NOT wrong with him

The attack dog of the group. Some people have said he's outright growled at them.

Selectively mute. The most you'll get out of him is a few mumbles

HATES Hydra with every fiber of his being, he wants that lesbian DEAD, but he wants to be the one to kill her.

Charon is the only guy able to calm him down when he gets overly worked up. Styx helps but there is a difference between 'calm' and 'not mauling everyone because the little guy is here'

TERRIFIED of the CFO. No one knows why, he just never passed the vibe check.

Poly with Charon and Styx. Actually initiated the relationships in the first place.

Acts as the bouncer of the place. He's really good at it too.

Hanji x Kenny, if it's alright, there's very cute fanart of them both, I know it's unusual but I'm kind of dying to see what it could be like XD still ♥ Thank you!!

YES. Congrats to Kazuhiro and Romi (Kenny and Hange's VAs) for their marriage. Legit didn't know for the longest time 😭

Kenny x Hange headcanons!

(sorta modern and canon AU?)

-Kennyhan, Hanny, Kenhan?-

OKAY so

Kenny and Hange would definitely be a fun couple. They'd cause chaos together and I'm here for it, honestly.

as soon as they got together, it'd legit be them poking fun at Levi. They'd be absolutely relentless with teasing and insulting him together

Kenny would probably have no idea what Hange is doing with their experiments and just fidget with random things in their lab

Kenny would playfully insult them and joke around with them a lot. Hange would never mind the insults as they NEVER took it seriously but the jokes would just keep getting thrown back and forth

Hange being so chaotic and curious is probably what pulled Kenny in

He'd probably be the one making the first move too. Again, Hange made Kenny interested with all their shenanigans causing him to start flirting with them

They might not even understand it at first, honestly. Like why is this old man here saying this random crap? But they'd reciprocate it whether they meant to or not. Either that or he got blown off by them giving him short answers as they were completely focused on an experiment of theirs

They'd probably playfully flirt at first though before making anything official. Especially after learning they both knew Levi

In fact, he'd be their first conversation. They'd definitely bond over the 'little runt' and it's probably make them really good friends

I think Hange and Kenny would begin hanging out together doing their own hobbies. It could be at the bar, Hange's lab, some random rooftop as they wondered how long it'd take for a human to fall down the roof. It could be anywhere. They'd both make fun out of anything

I honestly don't think their personalities would clash much. They aren't the most similar but they aren't too different. Kenny would enjoy Hange's energy and chaotic self while Hange would enjoy Kenny's toughness and somewhat funny self

They'd both be the life of the parties with no shame. Like they'd both just be some chaotic duo doing stupid shit and not giving much of a damn about what anyone else thought

Kenny would definitely still be the tough one though. Although both of them aren't too serious all the time, Hange would be a bit more open and fun. Even then though, they both know when and where to get serious

I honestly think conversations with Hange and Kenny would be the farthest thing from bland. They could both talk for hours on end about the most random crap that it's impressive..Although, Kenny would definitely be the one to lend it quicker..Hange just cannot be stopped.

Once Kenny and Hange were to get together, it'd be game on. They'd be together a lot. They'd tease Levi together, talk about random stuff together, experiment together, and work as a team in a way

Kenny wouldn't be too soft with Hange of course but would treat them as a very close friend of his which he usually doesn't do so it definitely means something.

He'd be more open with them though, probably more than anyone else. He'd still keep stuff to himself since Hange's got a big chatter box on them but he'd be a bit more open with them in particular

Overall they'd have a pretty solid relationship. It'd have some rough edges sometimes but it wouldn't be a bad one since they could match each other's energy

♥ Thank you for reading ♥

ok contining off of my other mlp eqg post , making a higher education list for the humanified ponies yknow!

ok starters , fluttershy! animal caretaker, which i feel is obvious. i mean look at her fucking house. ive seen that you need a highschool diploma which id feel as she would definitely have, and possibly needing a bachelors in something of animal care something of the sorts so, she probably majored in animal husbandry? we know damn well she probably already knew everything pertaining to it tho and minored in.. something. ill go for ecology

ok! rainbowdash! i still think they'd just have a highschool diploma, probably no further education because they'd have the same aspirations as the one in the eqg world. maybe her parents wanted to push them into a community college or something tho and then they went to it for a while then perhaps quit. like that one old mlp series LOL. she'd of course do her best to do whatever the human equivalent of the wonder bolts would be, which is gonna be an athletics team now even tho being a jet flying team would make more sense but whatevs!

aj. of course she would just work on the farm still. nothing past a highschool diploma. she does definitely have a diploma tho and not a GED or anything because she was so young when her parents had passed so she was already used to everything being so fucking hectic so she was able to balance everything (however. i do believe big Mac definitely dropped out of highschool and later in life acquired a GED ) (these mfs HATE cps)

twilight fucking sparkle. the next fucking RULER of GOD DAMN EQUESTRIA. what would she fucking do? the girl who was attending cram school the same time as all of her grade schools by choice, spending her summers at camps for miscellaneous academic upgrades or spent them right under celestias wing. of course she did a 2 year school first, got to butter up the guys that'll give her her undergrad! so im not incredibly sure what a future benevolent totalitarian leader would have as schooling. but since she shows the most interest in science ill say she got an associates in fucking physics or something, then a bachelors in let's say science of business, so she knows how to take care of shit! then of course it's fucking twilight so she'll go on to get her masters and then doctorate in something so. yaknow

pinkie pie, same as eqg she's getting an associates in culinary! with her highschool diploma of course. due to where she grew up id imagine she didn't have a very good highschool schooling experience, with the bare minimum classes and all. perhaps later in life, she'd go and get a degree in business because of how she takes over the bakery later on , so <3

AND RARITY! of course she also went to a 2 year school at first too. but got a degree in dun dun dun... BUSINESS MATH! and then a bachelors in something of the fashion design sorts. she'd probably have a pretty goof amount of school honestly but id imagine she would get her masters much later on in life. probably a business networking thing or something

and the man who inspired it all.... DISCORD!!!!! PRE SCHOOL TEACHER!!!!! the way i know that this man is a fucking genius. and just did NOT apply himself for SHIT in highschool LMAO. only reason he got into college is from a baller ass letter of recommendation. started off with community college probably, and honestly i think he was doing some sort of math. maybe business math like rarity! or mathematical finance even tho they sound like the same thing... and then gets a bachelors in psychology probs! definitely minored in something random as fuck for funzies.. and then at some point i imagine he realized hey, kids? cool as fuck! let me get my masters in education! and he's set since he got that psychology degree

High hopes in Monaco after the cancellation of Imola

Heya!

Well, I was originally planning on writing last week after the announcement of the GP in Imola being cancelled due to the floods going on in the Emilia Romagna region, but between my shitty shifts and exhaustion, I couldn't even think about it.

It was a sad thing, but it was the necessary decision. For once, the FIA was quick to decide what was best and also for once, they made the right choice. Just wish people in the area were all okay...

This weekend I'm watching it all after work, so yeah I'll be late once again. On another note, we started this race weekend with the news of Honda teamming up with Aston Martin starting 2026 and rumors about Yuki being a possibility to join Alonso. That would be funny tbh. Also, Mercedes FINALLY got rid of the "no sidepods" concept on the car. Really hope this levels things, at least a tiny bit (I'm expecting no miracles).

Anyway, onto the actual purpose of this post, so I'm starting at last.

Press conference - Thursday

First press round and not really anything interesting except for Yuki's take on the floodings in Italy. I'm here just waiting for the second round to start so that I can watch the chaos unfold 🤣

Chaotic Sharl is on and I'm here for it, "Hello, Lewis" sounded like the funniest shit in the world with that laughter of his. Seriously, I can't 😗 I do love those Lewis-Sharl interactions, they're so cute seriously and they'd make an insane duo, lots of fun stuff would be sent our way for sure.

Piarles clowning together about the football match a few days ago and how they just clashes into each other despite being in the same team. Really, boys? 🥲

Do people still think, given what we've seen this year so far and also last season, that Ferrari is a good choice for Lewis? I mean, yes Mercedes is not going through their best moments right now, but Ferrari? After so many disasters and making their own driver lose the chances of gaining a championship? I love Ferrari, but come on.

Free Practice 1 - Friday

Finally some movement in the streets of Monte Carlo and I'm actually thinking about all the new rumors that we might get after the race. I've been waiting for this weekend just for this 🤣

I know there have been a few Red Flags today so I'm just here waiting for them. I don't care how boring this track can get, I just love it and nothing's gonna change that. Ever.

Sid the Sloth is crying on the radio. What for? He has a fucking missile despite that much complaining and whining about it.

Not much else going on, pretty calm session for now. Apart from Sargeant having some kind of problem, nothing else to say. And I obviously spoke too soon, since Nico span a little bit too hard and fucked up his rear left tyre, causing a Yellow Flag that turned into a Red Flag. First of the day.

Sharl probably touched the wall or so, and right afterwards Albon crashed on his side, so the session was Red Flagged permanently now, with 3 minutes to go. Quiet one despite those problems, but not the worst news possible considering.

Free Practice 2 - Friday

SEB IS AT THE PADDOCK, I REPEAT, SEB IS AT THE PADDOCK 🥹 PLEASE SEB, COME BACK TO US, WE NEED YOU 😭

Besides different drivers trying out setting times and so on, there's been nothing going on. I do love that tunnel, though. That must be scary as fuck, honestly.

Aaaaand Carlos tries to goes as close to the wall as possible but crashes. Fantastic job causing another Red Flag. Quite a few drivers have gone very, very close but have managed to get out unscathed. I guess it's damn luck (on top of skill obviously, they're going over 200kph).

Commentators are talking about the future 2026 PUs and honestly, if the regulations for that year are as bad as the ones introduced in 2022, this will just get worse by then.

Maybe tomorrow something else will happen, especially during Quali, which I'll obviously watch late.

Free Practice 3 - Saturday

Well, I already know what happened in Quali today, but just gonna watch in order first so that I can finish this one post, I don't want extra tabs open on my browser right now, it's been a tough day at work 🤪

So Estie Bestie stopped in the middle of the tunnel (on the side anyway), but managed to get back to the pit lane, so at least nothing scary going on.

Wasn't Laurent Mekkies supposed to be in Alpha Tauri by now? Or did I miss something? I keep seeing him on the Ferrari pit wall 🤔

Honestly, nothing going on in FP3 so I was just watching memes on IG the whole time. Oh Jesus, and Lewis against the wall all of a sudden?! What the hell. That car being moved by the crane.... Was that really necessary, taking it so high!?

Red Flagged session so that means I'm gonna go watch Quali finally.

Peace out!

I Survived the "Voltron: Legendary Defender" Fandom Ship Wars

I've seen my fair share of fandoms, and the subsequent warring that can go on within them. Shipping tends to be the primary focus of a lot of it, and that was no more true than "Voltron: Legendary Defender" and I'm reliving my experience with it because shut up.

I literally was only in this whole thing because, as the Megas XLR theme song states, "I dig Giant Robots", which is true of pretty much everyone. I wanted a fun space opera quest with giant friggin robots that was done better than the anime from the 80s. The prospect of former members of the crew of Avatar: The Last Airbender being on the project sweetened the deal. And for a time it was good... and then it all imploded because idiots had to ruin it.

This was honestly the dumbest dip in fandom engagement I've ever seen and it was all over shipping and seriously stupid fucking people. A series if idiotic actions that led to compromises at the creative level that severely undercut the end product. Everything that transpired in the run up to the series finale, from the 7th Season onward, perhaps even before that, you can trace to one thing... the Shipping War between which dude Keith, the Red Paladin, should fuck. His older mentor Shiro, who turned out to already be in a same-sex relationship, or Blue Paladin Lance... the literal Lancer of their five man band.

Oh it got ugly fast, Shiro was too old for Keith, they were reading too much into rivalry of Lance and Keith, accusations of pedophilia, nasty screaming about whether they'd LET these characters be gay, I watched it all and rolled my eyes thinking "Who gives a flying fuck?" Let's not even get into how the fandom treated the potential female rivals for Lance and Keith's affections. Allura and Lance shippers were a lesser front in the war of words. The main screaming matches were between the slash ships, but there was always a little ire reserved for anything hetero. I remember how desperate they all were to find a way out. To prove that Space Azula, Acxa, was not into Keith, maybe even his sister.

For a while it stayed like this, angry fans on reddits and twitters and tumblrs and forums of all sorts. Then the shippers did the big No-NO, what EVERY fan sooner or later seems to forget. You bring this drama to the attention of the creators... and you involve them in it. Suddenly it's no longer about preferences, it's about fans making demands of the creative team. "Make us Canon or die!" And it probably wouldn't have been so bad if the Voltron Team wasn't so active on social media, but they were! Poor sweet summer children, were they ever.

Any tacit support for one side over the other was seen as damning condemnation. How DARE the creatives speak about their own preferences? Or ideas? Or lend credence to that side over the others! Maybe they're pedos too if they seem to want Keith and Shiro to be together. How dare they dismiss all this evidence of Klance and ruin their whole super important character development that is clearly integral to the story about the intergalactic war against an even empire utilizing a giant robot.

I just did not care for ANY of this. I was paying attention to Pidge exclusively at this point as her story was far more engaging and or interest than over some stupid romance most people had made up in their head. And I felt that getting on the asses of the creators to bend to one side of the other was becoming more and more fucking disrespectful. Let them tell their story, ya jerks, stop trying to force them to tell what you want. Just write fanfics if you're that desperate.

Then... someone did something VERY stupid. Well, two someones actually. During a tour of Dreamworks Animation, someone thought it would be quite "corking" if they allowed their fellow "high school chums" a look at some classified storyboards and sketches. A few neat little spoilers online that they snuck out of the tour on a hidden camera. Clever little scamp, posted it online... and instantly drew the ire of Dreamwork's legal department. Net wide, Dreamworks demanded the removal of the spoilers. But one moron thought it would be a brilliant fucking idea to keep them up... unless demands were met.

"Make Klance Canon and I'll take the spoilers down!"

The idiot's understanding was, since other sites had the pictures, that they couldn't be liable for stealing anything. They didn't take the pictures, they just had them. So really, if the other sites were going to be pressured into removing the material, they could keep it up and use it as a form of protest. To make their stupid ship real.

Other people told them, that's fucking blackmail, that's illegal. And eventually that thought stuck.

Yeah ya did, Sunshine. People thought these two fans were one in the same, but from every indication it seems like it really was two people with the "blackmailer" likely being a really stupid kid who took advantage of a situation without realizing that their plan was gonna potentially land them in a ton of legal trouble. But the damage was done at this point. Because once fans start threatening to ruin ALL of your creative plans, that's when the higher ups get involved. That's when shit has to change and drastically.

To summarize what happened, from what most people have gathered, a lot of story points, ideas, plots, etc. got up ended by all of this. They had to alter their original ideas because the fans had fucked it up by going overboard. Now, whatever plans they had for the series were basically thrown out the window in favor of a new direction that NO ONE LIKED!

Allura and Lance get rushed into a relationship, Shiro's husband dies and he finds a new one some rando background dude. Any potential Keith romance is just thrown out because both sides are already losing, might as well not anger them more, oh and then lets kill off Allura next just as quickly as we finalized this relationship. EVERYBODY LOSES and it's all because a bunch of shippers could not fucking chill!

And I just laughed, I just had so much fun watching the rest of this trainwreck slide into the on fire tire fire on the garbage scowl before sinking into the sea and hitting an unexploded atomic warhead from a sunken sub! They all went ballistic, every single fan just fucking went off at once in a screaming angry tirade of abject total failure. But I was mostly cool, because Pidge got a great ending and I didn't care about anything else at that point. So out of ALL the fans of Voltron, I won. I won along with every Pidge fan and I was more than happy to watch the rest burn. And fuck'em anyway, they did this to themselves. Let them all shriek and screech and run around mad at the creators. They made themselves so fucking toxic, so goddamn impossible to deal with that I'd have probably done it sooner were I in charge and probably worse.

I'd have had Auxia kiss Keith full on the lips while she lifts one of his legs to lightly straddle her while both Shiro and Lance look on giving thumbs up and hugging close their own significant others. Shiro's would've been a dude at least because I'm not so cruel as to throw away LGBT representation. But still, totally would've done that shit in like season 5. Trust me, I would've drunk the angry screeching of everyone because they all deserved it at that point. ALL OF THEM. I have no sympathy.

Voltron: Legendary Defender is a lesson for fans the world over. Shipping is all fun and games when you keep it that way. Write fanfics, share your headcanon, create all the racey sexually explicit dude on dude, girl on girl, human on tentacle monster, etc. art you can paint or sketch to your heart's desire... but leave the creative team out of it. It's ultimately their story, not yours. And believe me, most of you here and Tumblr played RIGHT into all that shit because I know at least a few of you fucking did this.

As for me, to prove I'm not completely above it all, I'll pony up. I had one Voltron Ship, one I actually liked, supported and was totally cool with knowing it was never gonna happen. And it's not any of the ones you think... I wanted Lance to get with one specific person. Well, not person, fish-person.

Plaxum! That's right! I wanted Lance to end up with the Mermaid Revolutionary voiced by Mae Whitman! Because fuck it, Mermaids are fucking awesome and you can try however you fucking want to ruin the fantasy of mermaid love under the sea with your fish biology lessons, I know for a fact you're all wrong because if anything, mythical mermaids are more akin to sharks than regular fish and SHARKS actually DO have sex. The males have TWO big fat ones down under in fact, so what does that say about mermaids?

So in conclusion this has been a very long winded way of me justifying my mermaid fantasy and possibly grossing a lot of you out. I have no regrets and if any remaining Voltron Fans want to take issue with it, tough. The show's over I can make up whatever I want. Namely that Lance eventually returned to Mermaid world and had a hundred or so babies with Plaxum, because I live in fanfic land and you can't drag me out of it if you tried!

I have now thoroughly wasted ALL of your time. Good day!

the sex worker kaj paid for was /supremely/ unhelpful; while kaj was flattered by the girl's intensive efforts to please, the courier's repeated reminders that she was paying for /information on cachino/ fell on deaf ears. she comes out of the backrooms of gomorrah more than a little annoyed, clothes ruffled from the worker's efforts to get a tip, no less informed about cachino's comings or goings. though she brightens genuinely when she comes into the main hall, seeing boone's expression as a dancer tries to shake a handsome ncr soldier down for caps. arcade, next to him, is bright red and looking at anything else but the woman's bikini, his arms crossed. kaj grabs a seat next to boone, unable to bite back her grin. "it's called a naked woman, by the way. i happen to be one under the duster, in case you were wondering. how do you think you two came into this world, anyhow? a stork?" her tone is teasing. kaj tucks another cap into the woman's hand, which already holds a few, and leans back against the couch to face them both. "you know, i thought about picking up a job here, once upon a time. not too difference from being a soldier, really, is it? though i don't know if i'd have gotten a lot of tips, all these pretty young things running around." yes, she's trying to embarrass them. is it working? on arcade, perhaps, because flirtation from a woman is guaranteed to make him turn inside out. but craig is always a mystery of few words. she's hoping for a blush, at least.

If Boone was still and somber most usually, here and now he might as well have been a marble statue.

It wasn't new to him; not too long ago he'd been a young out-of-town soldier on leave here in the Strip, and had blown his caps on lap dances and good booze. It had made him feel out of place and anxious back then too, but the rest of the Recon team would be damned if they'd let him get out without a face full of tits.

Nowadays, Boone was better about not showing it. Honestly, having Arcade nearly blowing a gasket next to him helped-- always easier to stay calm when your wingman was losing his shit. As their dancer bent over to show off her irradiated ass, Boone's gaze slid over to Kaj once she sat down next to him. "Shoulda done it, then. Maybe that way I wouldn't have to deal with you."

That was of course the first sign that Boone was feeling a bit grumpy here. The second came when their dancer decided to razz him up further, and slid off her stage to make her way into his lap.

Boone's hands shot up at his sides, first in a reflex to catch her as if he thought she'd fallen, then to make very sure he wasn't anywhere near touching.

"Jesus Christ," he growled, "if I give you a tip will you please move on? He's gay and I'm debating it too."

"Thank you," Arcade all but whined next to him. Despite the dancer's sour expression, Boone pulled a handful of caps from a pocket of his pants to hand it over to her-- granted she pressed her breasts into his face while he did.

Caps achieved, the dancer pressed a kiss to his forehead and sauntered back to the stage.

This time, Boone was bright red. "Fuck."

Monkey King 2009 Episode 14

I feel like someone on the writing team took umbrage to the idea a little bamboo raft would do well in open ocean. The pointed camera angle on the stores falling into the water the second they hit rough seas seemed...targeted lol.

Anyway, another lower-energy episode. I can't really say "calmer" since Old White Deer on screen together with Six Ears makes my skin crawl and feel anything but calm (Six Ears is not acting right at all, what did he do?), but it was definitely transitional, at least.

Speaking of Old White Deer, he has all these 干 relationships and it's so freaking weird. First there was just Demon King, now there's King Flood Dragon, and then Six Ears. Are there others? Does he just make a habit of this? Is this how he acquires minions? Six Ears calls him teacher right now, but is Old White Deer someday going to try to induct him into this creepy, creepy "family"? This weird cult? Were King Flood Dragon or Demon King and whoever else at one point also kids he lured in off the street, or got in good with their parents' trust somehow?

I don't like this???

Augh. Old Monkey King, please cave this guy's skull in with your staff. That might sound excessively violent. It's not. Like, why did Old White Deer go through the trouble of changing Six Ears's clothes with that spell last episode? Aesthetic? He's not a doll? Everything about this is so fucking creepy and I wasn't actually expecting it to be this creepy?

ANYWAY

Six Ears was present when Stone Monkey left! The credits have them talking too, which is great, and actually kind of make Six Ears look more conflicted and sort of...like himself than the actual episode makes him out to be. Which is also good, but also...I'm confused about the extent of that mind-whammy spell? I guess it'll become clearer over time. He was present, though. I sure hope one of the adults picked up on the fact he's not acting right :) And wonder where he's getting off to. Checking up on him after that pretty public outburst at least, maybe. That would sure be nice.

And if my entire lack of any mention of them whatsoever wasn't a clear enough sign, I...do not especially care about the heaven subplot. It gets smiles out of me occasionally, like when Laozi and General Li had their chat, and I try to keep track of things like - apparently they all have Precious Heavenly Birds that are also sometimes inanimate objects that they fight like beyblades or something? (why???) but...*heavy sigh*. I just don't care. Especially not about Fucking Dipper. That guy is...not the worst because Old White Deer exists, but he is up there. He is extremely up there.

And now, because Wudou the Absolute Tool has apparently decided to finally start putting that awful, petty little plot he's been not-so-subtly "slyly insinuating" to everyone in heaven about for the entire damn show into motion, I have to actually pay attention to him. Ugh.

Though him ending up in the middle of the monkey troop was a treat. Especially with them still so wired and territorial after almost all dying to the Demon King's army. Like, to be fair, they found a random stranger essentially taking photos of the entrance to their home, and that's a bit worrying for most people even when not regularly engaged in life-threatening warfare with their neighbors. Did they still jump to conclusions? Yes, absolutely. Would Wudou have deserved this if some nice paintings were really all he wanted? Of course not. But he's him, I've been stuck watching him weasel his way around being slimy and proprietary about Flower Fruit Mountain for pretty much the entire time I've known him, and so these guys giving him absolutely no quarter felt great, actually. No one deserves the four generals being the four generals at them more, honestly. I only wish they'd kept talking to him longer. They may have actually been able to make him cry with frustration. Especially Marshal Liu.

Also I called it, I called it, I even noticed this last episode but forgot all about it after the emotional bomb of those last five minutes, but General Ba really will not let General Beng say a single word anymore without immediately screaming GRANDPARENT TALK at him. It's so funny. Just let the man speak!

Especially when it gives us gems like General Beng, Mr. "I got praised once as a child for reading a book of poetry and I made it my whole identity" of all people busting out a sudden: "What the fuck just happened???" into the dead silence after Wudou's sudden vanishing.

Look, I'm harsh on them, but I really don't hate the four generals. I just think they should never in any way have any direct authority over children. They are better people when interacting with other adults and especially each other, honestly.

My heart, despite itself, did soften a little at General Beng and Marshal Ma yelling at Stone Monkey to just come back home if it was too hard, and all the commanders and maybe the whole troop picking it up. Though I also noticed how much better their attitudes became when Stone Monkey was given an actual title, especially one as prestigious as heir to their king. Definitely noticed that. Especially when them yelling at him to come home soon and safe contrasted their dead silence when they let him leave into the wilds of Flower Fruit Mountain entirely on his own just a few episodes ago :) Some things in life really are so much easier when you have status, I guess!

BUT. Stone Monkey. His calming breath as he looks out over the open ocean in front of him before buckling down was a really good moment? I liked that a lot. He was taking the adventure pretty okay, too! Cheerfully settling in, brightly looking for solutions to some minor inconveniences, and then...Ginseng Fruit is broken out of their gourd hiding place and you see Stone Monkey go through a mini-crisis when he realizes Ginseng Fruit is now in danger right along with him and Stone Monkey is going to have to keep them safe. The stress just slams back down. He makes the best of it, of course, and doesn't let Ginseng Fruit see much when he gets rattled, and he does genuinely like having friends with him, but I mean. Guy was definitely struggling for a few seconds there. What was he going to do, throw Ginseng Fruit into the ocean if he didn't like them being there? Try and row back to Flower Fruit Mountain against a headwind and the current to drop Ginseng Fruit back off? Like it or not, Ginseng Fruit is there to stay.

And then later when King Flood Dragon reveals himself (and he's a super creepy guy too, genuinely just messing with them and heightening their terror and struggle for fun, and it was actually disturbing), Stone Monkey snatching Ginseng Fruit up and tucking them up against his chest where they're safe and out of the way, immediately taking as much control of the situation as he can? His "Let me handle it!" making a comeback, like when he forcibly removed Six Ears from the canyon when their shelter went down. I think you can tell when Stone Monkey's genuinely scared or stressed because he immediately turns into a control freak about it. Just grabbing his friends and bodily shoving them out of the way as he tries to take over everything. I love this version of Sun Wukong so much. The writers really love examining his protectiveness, and how it's both a virtue and a flaw.

And then him trying so hard to throw Ginseng Fruit to safety when he realized he couldn't get them both out. Ay.

AND his "You can't die. You'll definitely find a big brother better than me someday (read: I'm about to die and I have to imagine you making it out and having a future and being happy and safe even without me because otherwise I'm going to lose it)." Putting all that effort into getting Ginseng Fruit clear, as safe as he can, followed by that long shot of him just having to sit there helplessly as he's pulled down to his death, unable to do anything to save himself.

Shhhush up, I don't have a lump in my throat.

It's okay though because Guanyin's coming in clutch. I couldn't see clearly enough to tell if it was another one of her hairs (if so, he's already gone through two and we're only about a quarter-ish of the way through the show oh no) or if she just called foul on King Flood Dragon and decided to intervene directly.

Build Up - 2vs2

omggggg, Seunghun and his braces. I live. He's the cutest. Why tho? Weren't his teeth fine??

dang, that vanner kid is cute! (V13: Taehwan (30) (Vanner)) ohhhh, i was wondering if they'd disqualify goshhhhh Jeup and his cheek bones are pretty V14: Lim Sanghyun (26) (solo?) gets a point from me for just barging on down there

ohhhhh, Seunghun went up to Neon! okay there baby!!

okay, Hyukjin was ADORABLE when the other kid came down to the bottom

who's that talking to Jeup?? V17: Choi Suhwan (22) (X101) no pass. Jeup do ballad and rock ballad. DONGHAN STEALING HIS MAN!! Jeup really is adorable. so flattered he got 2 2VS2 look at Baekho looking at Seungkwan. Proud Dad 100% OMG WAIT. BOO GETS TO JUDGE JEUP AND SEUNGHAN????? dead. dying. gone.

WTF spoiler. showing all the pairs sitting together. idiot Mnet. V34: Park Jeup (30) (Imfact) 8 > 10 > 8 V17: Choi Suhwan (22) (X101) 3 > 4 > 7 vs V20: Lee Donghun (30) (A.C.E.) 6 > 10 > 8 V4: Sunyoul (27) (UPT10TION) 2 > 2 > 6 - oh shiz! this is gonna be interesting! - Jeup's face when Donghun called him out is EVERYTHINGGGGG and when Jeup gives him knuckles... okay, gotta stop fangirling. - Seunghun bobbing his head along. <3 - I've never seen Jeup do anything remotely rock like this! - okay, SHERLOCK TEAM gets a 9.5 from me. That was really good. - JONGHYUN TEAM - it was boring for me. 6.5 - what is Donghun's outfit?? - ahhhhhh, Boo is a biased judge. I see how it is. - Donghun DO know how to deliver a feeling though. I guess it's cause he CRY SO DAMN MUCH! - Sunyoul is quite a pretty kid though. Like he does have a pretty look.

V1: Seunghun (24) (CIX) 4 > X > 7.5 V33: Neon (23) (nothing) 1 > 10 > 9 vs V23: Yun Inhwan (32) (solo - ENAN) 4 > 2 > 6 (pink sweater) V25: Ma Jaekyung (27) (Romeo) 3 > 4 > 4 (white shirt) - Wendy straight looked at Seunghun and said woooooowwww. 100% do not blame her. man is fine. How tall is he again?? - Seunghun's "let's go!" & nod <3<3 - Seunghun got his tounge out. 10's 10's 10's across the board! - not my favorite song, but I like Seunghun back in R&Bish style. I'd say CRUSH SONG = 7 - seeeeee MC nim loooooves Seunghun too! - honestly, I liked Neon's performance better though - OMG Eungkwang right though! "Did we have him before??" - ROY KIM SONG = 6.5 - okay but, I bet Jaehwan is rough in bed. _ mehhhh, I would choose the other team to win, but what can ya do. V12: Wumuti (24) (Solo?) 8 > 6 > 7 V7: Kang Hayoon (20) (Loud) 7 > 5 > 5 vs V2: Jay Chang (22) (ONEPACT) - 8.5 > 8 > 10 V36: Bitsaeon (28) (M.O.N.T) 5.5 > 3 > 10 - Like, I want Jay Chang to be cute so badly, but I just can't get there! He does have a really pretty side profile though. and he's getting there honest as I get into his personality. - ew. Kang Hayoon, stop with that baby voice in your intro - Wumuti just does toooooo much. - fuck, that 1st note. WHY IS Jay Chang not solo already? Thats so dumb. - and when Bitsaeon hit that falsetto! damn! - when Jay Chang hit that growl voice and Seungkwan made that face? I FELT THAT! - hahahahah Jaehwan - OMG, when Bitsaeon hit that high note! I threw my hands up and my mouth dropped. CHARLIE PUTH SONG gets a 10 from me dawg. - goddamn, I still wish it was Bumzu there instead of Baekho. Like that doesn't even make sense. - HARRY STYLES SONG WS LIKE 6.5 for me - I wanna see Wumuti w/o the contacts and sparkles and pink hair and whiiiiiite ass face - It WASN'T perfect. homie's voice Kang Hayoon was too jarring. I didn't like that - Wumuti talks such a big game then *shocked pikachu face* when he gets good scores. so they still have individual rankings??? confusing. and dumb cause all the kids with a group get the top spots.

V37: Kang Seokhwa (23) (Wei) 7 > 4> 3 (whiteish hair, flat face) V11: Jeon Woong (26) (AB6IX) 3 > 4 >4 (black hair, jacket studs) vs V24: Ji Yeonwoo (??) (nothing) 7.5 > 4> 3 (blue w/ hat) V32: Jeong Yunseo (??) (nothing) 2 > 3> 4 ( i really dont care about any of these kids, but lets go! - goddamn, Jeups pretty, huh? - Ji Yeonwoo is real nasally. and Jeong Yunseo is just boring to me. - bugs me how female idols clap softly with completely straight hands - Kick it. What a dumb song choice. it's boing and does nothing for their voices. - DONT RAPPPPP. this is stupid. - I loooooove how Jaehwan is being a cunty judge though. No fucks. - I'd say BLACKPINK song = 3 and the other also SUJU GUY ONE = 3 - get rid of em all. filler. move on.

- V39: Kim Minseo (21) (nothing) 4 > 4 > 5 (black hair) V3: Bain (22) (JUST B) 9 > 6 > 6 (orange hair) vs V19: Lee Gwangseok (25) (solo) 1 > 4 > 4 ( V16: Kim Seong jeong (24) (nothing) 1 > 3 > 5 ( - first team dressed slick and i like that - Kim Seong jeong was right though! His hair looks dumb that color, but Bain gets a point "for "first of all, it's orange." - Kim Seong jeong is endearing. I just like him - SEUNGKWANS confused face. sooooo cute! - why does Eunkwang wear super pointed collars. they look awful. - that was a pretty song, but i was still bored. Like a 5. - RIVER - i dont really like this song. or how their voices sound in it. It's too big for their voices. but i'll give it like a 6 - omfggggggggggg, they made Jeups frown bigger V10: Lee Geonwoo (22) (JustB) - 2 >2 > 3 (pinky hair) V30: Jung Soomin (19) (Solo) 4 > 7 > 4 (english sleepy one) vs V27: Hong Seongjun (24) (BDC) > 5 ( V18: Kim Seohyung (22) (musicals) 2 > 3 > 5 ( hmm, i messed up somewhere cause who is Hong Seongjun? But if I go back and try to figure it out proper I'll get spoilers!!! - UGHHHHHHHHH ballads omg so borrrrring. URBAN gets like a 4 - cuteeeee bros 4 life. ugh, this isn't my Crush song. bored. 4 -0mg wait, we're still on 2vs2? *SIGH* V21: Hong Sungwon (25) (solo?) 7 >5.5 > 5 ( V13: Taehwan (30) (Vanner) 9 > 7 > 6 (handsome boy) vs V5: Lim Junhyeok (30) (Ex-Day6) 1 > 2 > 3 (Day 6 kid) V40: Yeo One (27) (Pentagon) 2 > 2 > 3 (pentagon kid) - general tip. blue contacts look gross - the gays are gaying and fellow gay Boo loves it. - wtf is this song though? it's awful. - and why are these other 2 doing a musical??? omgggggggggggggggggggggggggggg, these are so boring. i dont care about any of these kids. V8: Choi Haram (22) (Musicals) 2 > 6 > 5 (suit, tie) V29: Hwang Inhyeock (25) (Nada) 3 > 6 > 4 (sweater vest) vs V15: Park Juhee (17) (trainee) 1 > 6 > 6 (jeans jacket) V35: Kwon Euibin (24) (Idol Band) 4 > 5 > 4 (purple cardigan) why is the baby cryinggggg? - YASSSSS cunty Jaehwan. I wish he was harsher oh they're clip showing the rest? fuck that. If i'm watching 1, i'm watching them all. you skipped 2? oh bullshit. V22: Hyukjin (30) (100%) 7 > 9 < 6 ( V6: Jeong Inseong (29) (KNK) 5 > 6 > 8 ( vs V31: Jang Intae (26) (nothing) 1 > 5 > 3 ( V9: Lee Minwook (23) (NewKidd) 4 > 5 > 6 X (ricky looking one) - Jeong Inseong has a really pretty tone to his voice. - omfg when Hyukjin said that highest note like "waaaah" i died - ppl really be bold when they try to cover exo V38: Lee Hwanhee (25) (UP10TION) 3 > 5 > 7 (red jacket) V26: Jo Hwanji (28) (Musicals) 3 > 5 > 5 (black jacket) vs V14: Lim Sanghyun (26) (solo?) 5 > 6 > 6 ( V28: Taewoo (26) (solo) 5 > 1 > 1 (smooshed face) I fuck with this kid Lim Sanghyun