Its 3am and ive just BLITZED my way through She Drives me Crazy. holy shit. I dont even have the WORDS for how amazing this story is!!!!!

I absolutely adored how you managed to incorporate the entire cast into a beautiful summer camp ensemble! Each character felt so true to the origins of the show but also somehow felt perfect in this setting??? (Youre so right Robin would wear backwards caps 🥰🥰🥰) the fruity four were such gems in this 🧡 each and every one of them so perfectly in character and added such a nice weight to the story, everyone was so well rounded, i teared up at the end when they all said goodbye 🥺

Ive never attended a summer camp in my life but the way you described the atmosphere and setting made me feel like i was there! I could smell the forest and the woodsmoke, feel the waters of the lake on my skin !! This story has honestly made me want to work at a summer camp!

Its like you perfectly managed to convey a sense of childhood nostalgia i dont even have. Like the environment of a temporary retreat that feels like a second home; where the rest of your life pauses and for a time: and this liminal space becomes your home! And its not perfect, its broken in places and a bit grubby in others but its Home! for a little while! And that little time combined with the people you share it with is what makes it so darn sweet!

Dont even get me started on your absolutely delicious *chefs kiss* tension between the reader and Steve! The back and forth banter, never holding back with such beautiful pacing that made it really feel like they've been going at it for years 🙏😭 every interaction they had felt so natural and your pacing was so lovely, it just felt right with each scene that played out! The day off at the lake sounds like such a gorgeous dream it has me so eager for summer!

Honestly your writing is masterful! Youre a very talented writer, being able to include such a big array of well loved characters, amazing dialogue and gorgeous settings all in one story! I feel spoiled just reading it!

and i was so impressed with the adorable website you made for the camp and everything 🥺🥺🥺

I hope you have a lovely day, and if you have any sort of taglist i would love to be on it!

Sorry for the rant! This story has filled me with great comfort during a hard time 🧡

Three am, bby 😭 I don’t think I can really respond eloquently to this. You’re too much, you’re so lovely, I am on the floor-

Please never apologise for a message like that! You’ve made me so happy and honestly, I can’t actually find the words to thank you enough. Thank you for reading, thank you for being so amazingly kind, thank you for taking the time to send such a lovely message.

You’ve made me smile so much 🥹🧡🧡🧡

Goof Week: Goofy Birthday Shortstacular!

Hyuck all you happy people! And HAPPY BIRTHDAY GOOFY! The celebration already got on track today with a look at the two part goof troop pilot. You can find that here.  

That review kicked off GOOF WEEK my weeklong look at all things Goofy, but as is tradition on this blog the birthday of one of the big three wouldn’t’t be complete without a look at their theatrical shorts career. And with this one i’ve covered all three of Disney’s biggest stars having covered Donald last june (and will again next month) and Mickey in September so it’s long overdue that my boy gets a shot and even longer overdue I watched some of his classic shorts. 

A large part of why I started doing these is because I love classic theatrical shorts and the reason I love looking at the Disney ones is, unlike Looney Toons or Tom and Jerry, I didn’t grow up with these and Disney never replayed them. At most you’d get one or a small slice of one in a House of Mouse episode. So this is a fun way to dive right into history and see a piece of Disney I’ve only started scratching the surface of. 

This is a fun one too. I ended bumping this up to 12 shorts again, and i’m glad as it allowed me to take a look at some of the weirder stuff and we go all over the place: We have dancing, goofy begging for a smoke, goofy devlopnig a split personality that calls him fat a bunch, a prototypical max who is a LOT, trips to medevil times and cowboy times, a tex avery esque noir short, and the lead in short to National treasure. If any of that sounds like a real good time to you, then keep reading under the cut!

Mickey’s Revue (1933)

Goofy was created by his VA Pinto Colvig, who based the character on the local happy go lucky moron from his home town, and after a dicussion with Walt it was decided to roll him into Mickey’s growing supporting cast. 

My guess from here is they decided to do a dry run to make sure the character worked with audeinces before giving him a full time roll. Given Goofy’s been both a staple of Mickey’s supporting cast and often more popular than the mouse or even the duck, you can see how that went. 

Colvig was awesome. While Bill Farmer is my preferred Goofy, I still tip my hat to the original and it’s clear this was a character he was born t play and it shows: a lot of characters take a short or too to really find their personality. Goofy.. has his early shorts persona straight out of the box> The only weird thing is he’s an ol dman here.. but otherwise his schick here, loudly eating peanuts, laughing a bit too loud and annoying everyone around him with no genuine malice.. that’s Goofy and Pinto really hit onto something and as we’ll see today had a TON of range beyond this. 

As for the rest of the short.. it’s forgetable. It’s not BAD, but it’s just Mickey and friends capering on stage. Nothing really out of the oridnary for these early Mickey Shorts, especially since some of them could get really damn creative.

The Whoopee Party (1933)

Now we have Goofy’s first proper appearance, going from joke character in the crowd to full member of Mickey’s friend group. 

This one is also just okay, but better than the last: Mickey and friends throw a wild party, with Mickey, Goofy and Horace making the sammiches. Goofy dosen’t do much btu gets a good gag or two, and overall it’s alright. Enjoyabl efor it’s lively animation and not much else. 

Goofy and Wilbur (1936) Three years later we get Goofy’s proper debut, a cute short about him using his Cricket friend to fish. That’s not the exestitnal nightmare that it sounds like mind you as Wilbur simply tricks them into Goofy’s net an donly gets eaten when they catch on and Goofy runs to his aid. The short really is more about Wilbur but it’s fair: like with Donald , who was paired with Pluto in his first solo short, they wanted to test the waters before having Goofy carry a cartoon himself. As we’ll see he very well could, but it’s fair to want ot backdor pilot it first and it’s easily one of the best shorts of today’s batch.

How to Play Baseball (1937)

First off while they make a good effort I already know how ot play baseball short...

How To Play Baseball is my faviorite of the Goofy Shorts on Disney Plus, which is a VERY small batch. Especailly since most of Today’s shorts aren’t at all problematic or inapproriate for kids. This one is a gem though. It’s one of the How To Shorts where a narrator goes ove rgoofy trying and failing at an activity though this one’s a tad diffrent. 

 The How To Narrator teaches us about baseball before narrating the world series game. It’s full of cleve slapstick, high speed animation and plain fun. It’s also part of the trend that would dominate Goofy’s sports career of putting him in whatever roll the shorts needed. Here he’s everyone at once, others he’s his old goofy self, other time sh’es just a normal joe. But Colvig does every version amazingly, so it all meshes and that general goofy design is so appealing it just WORKS.  So yeah while i’m not into sports I do genuinely love the How To shorts, as they were my faviorite part of House of Mouse and still are, and the originals are every bit as classic as their reputation says they are. 

A Knight For A Day (1946)

This one is the only other one of these on Disney Plus and it’s decent enough. Nothing incredibble or extra specail: Goofy plays a Squire who has to fil lin for his Knight in a tournament and tries to win a princesses hand against another douchier goofy. Simple stuff iwth some fun gags, but it just dosen’t feel all that fresh, especially since Disney already did a much better shorts with knights with Mickey’s “Ye Olden Days”. It just dosen’t feel as fun or creative as that one was btu on it’s own it’s fine. Nothing great, nothing terrible, just fine. First short of the day to feature Goofy’s faceless blonde love interest who in domestic shorts is his wife and by the same extension Max’s now dead mother. 

Tomorrow We Diet (1951)

We’ve got three from 1951 here. By this point Goofy had traditioned from lovable bumbler to every man, taking on a more generalized personality to fit into every day slice of life scenarios, using those to brilliantly contrast the goofy animated comedy with the more mundane setting it comes from. And sometimes it’s just straight up sticom humor with the ocasoinal joke you could only do in a cartoon.  And sometimes.. you get a version of Goofy who lives in a mirror taunting Goofy over being fat and then trying to keep him on his diet while it’s not clear if thi sis a split personality, a mirror ghost tormenting him that took his form and is doing this so Goofy breaks the mirror and frees him, or his evil doppleganger from another universe. 

Yeah .. one of the centerpieces of this short is Goofy’s reflection/split personality/earth 3 doppleganger/some sort of evil genie taunt shim abotu the fact he’s putting on weight startnig by saying “Hey Fat”... because apparently in this unvierse the best weight joke they can come up with is literally just calling someone fat. I bet I know who rules THIS timeline with an iron fist....

The first half of this short is Goofy being told he’s fat by a bunch of people and the second half is his hallucination/psychotic break/guardian asshole tormenting him with the diet. And I do mean tormenting: He knocks away all of Goofy’s food, then suggests he not even eat his carrot and STARVE himself, which is just deeply unhealthy, and earlier forces Goofy to let him read his book and then tell shim to just diet anyway. Which granted dieting IS sensible.

So yeah this short as you can probably guess by the fact it involves the term “Hey Fat” which was only said by a human being once.. Dick Kinney or Mick Shaffer, the writers of ths short,  when one pitched the line to the other and they laughed for some reason and put it in the script. But with that you can wager this short is REALLY outdated> Overating CAN be a problem and fat shaming still exists, but it’s far less tolerated and far less of a thing.

And hell I can tolerate a good natured weight joke, the Critic had some great ones, especially as a fat guy myself... but this isn’t good natured. The entire joke is, as the man said above HE’S FAT.. So as a legit short. it’s deeply unfunny at best, horribly insulting at worst. But as a so bad it’s good short? it’s GOLD. From the whole mirror goofy thing, to the fact fat is seen as a legit insult here or something to just call fat people because that’s what the writers thoguht humans, even in the 50′s talked like it’s just riffably cruel.. though it will obviously depend onthe viewers tolerance for both fat jokes and how creepy the short can be and again as a short it sucks. As something to be mocked for fun.. it’s fat with potential

Father’s Are People (1951)

Hey Kids you wanna see Max and Goofy reenact Problem Child? 

Given I did Goof Troop earlier this week and i’m finishing this week with A Goofy Movie, it shouldn’t come as a huge shocker that I wanted to cover the first short with Goofy’s son Juinor, who’d later be remolded into Max. 

The short STARTS promising with Goofy having a kid and the hyjinks that comes from having a baby child: Goofy passes out Cigars because Lung Cancer was the preferred way of celebrating having a child in the 50′s, runs himself ragid helping out, which I give the short credit for as “Donald’s Diary” three years later would play a man helping a woman around the house for horror. Here George (Goofy would often go by George Geef in later shorts) pitches in and while he’s clearly exausted he is trying to help with the boy. 

It takes a turn though once we jump ahead to a toddler Junior. Seriously a red head named junior... there’s no way that’s a coincidence. Anyways, the problem is unlike problem child, where Junor dosen’t really go after his dad but the assholes around his pushover dad who genuinely deserve it, this Junior goes after Goofy who at wors tis mildly negelectful but clearly loves his boy> He also DOES try to take a brus hto the kid... but it’s hard to be too mad about that as it was acceptable at the time and he dosen’t actually paddle a three year old. It’s like a less horrfying version of donald puttin ga penguin to a shotguns face in that the targeted party dosen’t see the threat and that goofy isn’t some form of sociopath in this short like Donald was there. It’s just not very funny and only worth watching at all for the historical value. 

No Smoking! (1951) (Patreon Selection by WeirdKev27)

This is my first of two Patreon selections, my patreon is here if you want to chip in a buck to pick a short for Donald’s birthday next month, by longtime friend and backer of the blog Kev. He suggested this one for the sheer absurdity of Goofy smooking.. and was right on the money> This one is DELGITHFUL. 

It works on two levels: it works on the modern level of seeing such an iconic cartoon grapple with trying to quit smoking, first smoknig so constantly a giant cloud appears over him and he has about 80 cigs in his mouth at once, but then trying to quit and being surrounded bycigs before finally DESPERATELY begging for one. As I discovered you really HAVEN’T lived till you’ve heard goofy madly call out “Smoke, smoke gotta have a smoke”. 

But while the novelty IS great.. it’s also just a good cartoon. Outside of some blatant racisim at the start, with a native american sterotype introducing smoking to colmbus which feels so wrong to type I need a shower and really puts a damper on the short which after that.. is just really funny. From the smoking through the ages, to the very creative smoking gags it’s just fun.. and it is CLEARLY anti-smoking, showing both the insane amount of cigrte smoker can go through and how mad the addiction can drive you. It’s not bad... though if you can’t stomach the blatant and terrible racisim.. I get that and it’s fair. 

Two Gun Goofy (1952)

This is one of two “put Goofy in another setting all together” pieces, both in the same year which tells me they were trying to find new stuff to do for Goofy. Thi sisn’t unheard of in cartoons: Around the same time and before Bugs Bunny went all over the world and thorugh time and space, and Mickey went through the looking glass and had two fantasy shorts, so i’ts not unusual

But what IS neat about these next two shorts is they combined the two goofys: he has his goofy demanor and oblivoiusness from the classic shorts, but still has his deeper, slightly less goofy voice from the everyman shorts and is still treated as an average joe, just one now undertaking genre careers, here a cowboy and next a detective

This short is decent. I’m a sucker for cowboy episodes apparently: either old west style showdowns or having the characters go to a dude ranch or something. So naturally I picked this one and was told Max was in it an dhe is... in a two second cameo when Goofy has a thought bubble after meeting faceless lady.

But this is a really enjoyable picture. not Disne’y sbest but good stuff. It also pairs Goofy with pete which really is a perfect pairing, putting our scowling rotund villian against our skinny well meaning hero. And while i’ts a common gag in a lto of things I do love Goofy accidently beating the shit out of pete as the short finds fun ways to do it. All in all worth a watch. 

How to Be a Detective (1952)

This one was a REALLY fun one. Like with westerns i’m a sucker for a good noir parody, even if ironically I haven’t watched much of either genre proper. Add in the fact this is clearly inspiried by Tex Avery’s work and i’m sold on this fun madcap romp with an approraitely more noirsh narrator. 

Goofy is naturally a detective and hired by the faceless woman to find “Al” having to contend with both a goon he keeps failing to recognize and The Chief of Police, played by Pete, who keeps telling him “I told ya to stay off the case Goof!”. It’s just the delivery makes it funny any time he says it as does his instance... and the punchline, which I won’t spoil to both that an dthe overaching mystery i sa gem. This one’s on youtube, seek it out, it’s damn fun. Before I go thoguh I also love how Goofy is Given “Goof Balls”. Yes GOOFY GETS DRUGGED and I am here for it

Father’s Day Out (1953)

I couldn’t find any GIF’s for this one, not even one’s in teh same tag that were unrelated so here, have more smoking Goofy. It will never not be funny.

This one is ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhtastic. Goofy is overworked, wnats to rest on his weeknd, and stuff gets in the way. Oh and halfway through he abrubtly has to take Max to the beach. It’s.. not much honestly. It’s like the simpsons if it wasn’t funny. 

How To Hook Up Your Home Theater (2007) (Emma Fici Patreon Selection)

You may notice the MASSIVE time jump here. That’s because while Disney still does theatrical shorts nowadays, in part because Pixar’s shorts turned out to be a huge hit, they almost never use the classic cast. This delightful anamoly is one of the few exceptions and was picked by Emma out of sheer curosity. And she picked well this short is fun, feelnig like a big budget version of the House of Mouse How To Shorts I loved so an dhaving a modern yet still ultimatley timeless subject: while the tech featured is missin ga streaming box and 4k, otherwise it really has aged incredibly well and getting all the diffrent modes set up and what not is a hassel we al lcan agree with. 

It’s a fun short with lots of good gags and humor as Goofy tries to set up his Home Theater before the big game, and worth a watch. Weirdly not on Disney+ though try explaining that one. 

One final note is for whatever reason this was paired up with National Treasure: Book of Secrets. 

My BEST GUESS i sthat it appeals to the kinds of dads who’d watch National Traesure: Book of Secrets as well as kids since it’s an adventure film. Though it now makes me want to see Nicholas Cage voice goofy. Get on it Disney. Not forever though, Bill’s a treasure. Just for a gag like Don Cheadle vocing Donald.. oh god put them together.. and then have them do a movie together I don’t think they have and do not know why. 

Final Ranking: As a bit of added fun to close this out and as a new feature for these i’m ranking today’s shorts from best to worst How To Be A Detective How To Play Baseball No Smoking Goofy and WIlbur How To Hook Up Your Home Theater Two Gun Goofy The Whoopee Party Mickey’s Revue Tommorow We Diet A Knight for A Day Father’s Are People Father’s Weekend

For the record despite not being a GOOD short Tommorow we diet is at least intresting, hence i’ts ranknig while Father’s weekend is just a boring 50′s version of problem child. Fathers are People at least has some good gags to set it off. 

So thank you for reading and if you liked this review give it a like and consider joining my patreon at patreon.com/popculturebuffet. As a patron you’d get access to exclusive reviews, the patreon’s discord and to pick a short each time I do one of these shortstaculars. Donald’s comnig next month and the deadline is in only a few days to join up for said month so the clock is ticking. Even a dollar a month helps me reach my stretch goals so please i fyou can sign up today and if not, I understand and i’ll see you at the next rainbow

Goliath and the Dragon

I promised you colour, and here it is, with a side of My Cheese Steak!  It was produced by our old friend Samuel Z. Arkoff, and actor Salvatore Furnari played an elf in The Christmas that Almost Wasn’t and Timotheus in Hercules and the Captive Women.  The rest of the cast may not have been on MST3K, but they still have distinguished bad movie pedigrees of their own.  Philippe Hersent was in Film Crew feature The Giant of Marathon, and a lot of the other actors, including star Mark Forest and leading lady Leonora Ruffo, were in other sword-and-sandal movies I’ve featured as Episodes that Never Were.  In fact, looking at the cast list right now, I discovered that Gaby Andre was also in my previous movie, The Strange World of Planet X.  I hope she’s better in this one.

Once Upon a Time there lived Emilius the Mighty, who was so brawny and manly he was called the Goliath of Thebes.  He gets back from the pits of hell to find that his much skinnier brother Illus is in love with Princess Thea, the daughter of Goliath’s sworn enemy.  Goliath of course disapproves, but Illus thinks it’s because Goliath is in love with Thea herself, and spends much of the running time moping and whining. Meanwhile the villain, Eurytus, has decided to marry Thea in order to become the next king – although he’s also promised to marry a woman named Arsinoe in exchange for her assassinating Goliath.  Arsinoe, however, falls in love with Goliath after he saves her from a bear.  It takes most of the movie to sort out the six layers of scheming, misunderstanding, and general idiot picture going on here, and then it’s finally ass-kicking time.  I think the titular dragon gets about thirty seconds of total screen time.

I said this was a Maciste movie, but that’s an over-simplification.  American International Pictures had previously distributed a movie called Goliath and the Barbarians (which had Steve Reeves in it!), and it did well enough that they wanted a sequel.  They thus purchased the totally unrelated film The Revenge of Hercules (which does not have Steve Reeves in it, although Mark Forest might kinda look like him if you squint), dubbed over the characters’ names, added a dragon, and crossed their fingers hoping that nobody would notice the whole cast was different.  So while MST3K gave us a couple of Maciste movies turned into Hercules movies, here we have a Hercules movie changed into a Maciste movie.

The plot is rather complicated, with multiple people and gods all conspiracizing at cross-purposes.  The summary I gave above is only about the first half of the movie. A lot of this ends up coming to naught, since the guy whose position seems to be King Eurytus’ Royal Schemer is very bad at scheming.  All his plots seem to consist of ‘just do nothing and they’ll die on their own’.  I guess we’re supposed to cheer on Goliath and Illus through this series of victories on their part, but instead it just feels like a waste of the audience’s time, with no real progress made on either side.  Things don’t really start happening until an oracle gives Goliath a prophecy – but like all Greek prophecies, it’s confusingly worded and just muddles things up further, leading characters to make decisions that undermine their own goals.  It’s kind of a frustrating film to watch.

Even worse, a lot of these plot threads don’t get tied up.  Eurytus has a history with both Goliath’s family and with Thea’s dead parents… what is that all about?  It sounds like it ought to be important but we never find out.  It can’t even be something that was explained in the first movie because the first movie was, remember, completely unrelated.  Illus and Goliath eventually make up but I can’t tell if Illus ever actually realizes that Goliath wasn’t interested in Thea and that the people who told him otherwise were lying.  The whole thing just kind of drops.  Arsinoe has some personal claim on the throne but that’s only described in the vaguest of terms, and the actress playing her looks just like the one playing Dejanira, so that gets confusing.  Goliath knocks down a temple at one point but this never seems to have any consequences, unless the confusing prophecy was the gods’ revenge for that… in which case it was a pretty weak revenge coming from beings known for turning people into trees because of a mild inconvenience.

Was this supposed to be Goliath defying the gods and winning?  It doesn’t seem that way, because things turn out exactly the way the gods prophesized – Illus marries Thea and becomes king, and a woman who loves Goliath dies.  This was all set up from the beginning and the audience saw it coming from a mile away even if Goliath didn’t, and it’s with the help of the wind goddess that Goliath wins the day.  So it seems that even after razing their temple, he’s still their favourite?  What sense does that make?

It doesn’t help that we don’t like any of the characters. The bad guys have no particular personalities besides being evil.  Goliath is kind of a dick who tears down the gods’ statues when their decisions displease him, and ties his grown-ass brother to a tree to keep him from running off to suck face with Thea (in the original, Hercules version of the movie, Illus is his son, which makes it even worse).  Illus is a lovesick whiny dope who spends a lot of time staring into the camera with a vaguely confused expression.

The women, meanwhile, are absolute ciphers, with nothing to do but further the plot.  Thea is here to be pined over and coveted.  Goliath’s wife Dejanira is here to be the subject of the dire prophecy, and Arsinoe exists to provide a loophole in it.  All three are totally bland, as are the two or three little kids who represent Goliath and Dejanira’s children.  Not a single member of the cast has any depth or any redeeming characteristics.

Thank goodness for the monsters.  The creatures in Goliath and the Dragon manage to walk that perfect line between ambition and cheapness where they become downright delightful.  There’s an amazingly silly three-headed fire-breathing dog guarding the gates of hell, hilarious papier-mâché skeletons hanging around in a dungeon, and a guy in a ridiculous bat costume flailing on the end of a string, and that’s just the first ten minutes.  The movie goes on to give us an even worse bear costume than the one in the Lou Ferrigno Hercules, and of course the dragon, which is a combination of a puppet head on a stick and a lousy Claymation dinosaur.  The two do not particularly look like the same creature. Were it not for these beasties the movie would be downright unwatchable.

The real animals here don’t fare as well.  There’s a snake pit, which is pretty standard issue for this kind of movie, and they actually found some fairly large pythons instead of resorting to adorable little corn snakes.  The problem is that if you know anything about snakes, these ones are clearly very stressed by the conditions of the shoot and rather worried about sacrificial victims falling on top of them.  Even worse is Eurytus’ pet elephant, whose job is stomping prisoners to death. Goliath’s stunt double wrestles with what is clearly the real elephant – dangerous for the man, but also bad for the pachyderm, who was just as likely to get injured and far less likely to receive medical care if she was.  The computer-generated animals of modern movies kinda suck, but at least we no longer have to torture real ones on camera!

Since its original title is The Revenge of Hercules, this is obviously a movie about revenge, and it’s a motif throughout the narrative.  One of the gods Goliath serves is the God of Vengeance (in ancient Greece revenge was actually a goddess, Nemesis), and the first heroic task he does in the movie is retrieve the god’s blood diamond (shame on the god – revenge is supposed to be honourable and should therefore rely on only ethically sourced gems!) from the underworld.  Later, when he feels the god has betrayed him, he smashes the diamond and destroys the statue.  Goliath takes revenge on vengeance itself!

Goliath also takes revenge on King Eurytus.  We are told that Eurytus killed Goliath’s parents, and appears to have taken out Thea’s as well, making him a fine target for revenge. We also get some idea that he’s in charge of the dragon that pops up at the beginning and end of the movie and never does much because it wasn’t in the script.  Exactly how this all works, however, is murky, and Goliath never even seems aware that Eurytus’ ultimate plan is to conquer Goliath’s home city of Thebes.  Plenty of cause for revenge, then… but all this backstory is only told to us, not shown.  The audience is thrown into the middle of this situation without really knowing what’s going on, and we never quire recover from it.  There’s no excuse for this, either.  A movie that could afford a three-headed fire-breathing dog could definitely afford a flashback!

Maciste movies and their ilk are usually a lot of fun, and this one has its charms.  Between the stupid monsters and Illus gazing vapidly into the void, there’s plenty of material that Joel and the bots could have worked with.  Goliath and the Dragon isn’t good enough to really enjoy but it’s also not bad enough to hate (even if the animal cruelty leaves a bad taste).  It really could use some riffing to spice it up.

Like why?!  Like why in the hell is this movie way the fuck better than it has any right to be?  Who was like “Omg I love Fantasy Island, I should totally write a tight script that is a fantastic web of interconnected stories, while also being a complete love letter to what Fantasy Island was back in the day.”  Well, kudos to Jillian Jacobs, Christopher Roach, and Jeff Wadlow.  Not sure who is responsible for what but thank you for putting this little, stupidly fun, gem together.

Most of you won’t even know what the movie is sourced from, but back in the day there was this adult dramady on network tv called Fantasy Island and it was run by the enigmatic  Mr. Roarke, played by the treasure that was Ricardo Montalban.  He hosted guests at a seemingly magical island where fantasies did come true, although never explained in the show.

The movie does the same, but being a Blumhouse production you’re pretty sure it’s going to have some kind of horror element.  It does of course, there is a bit of gore, but amazingly this movie doesn’t go over the top.  It actually lives within the rules it lays out and oddly those rules are pretty harmonious with the source material.

This is not great cinema by any means, but for a third rate horror film, it’s a damn good bit of story weaving.  Michael Peña, love him to death, but he’s not Ricardo Montalban, but he’s smart and doesn’t try and imitate the late actor.

The rest of the cast does a good job selling their parts as the audience slowly clues in on how there is more to all of these people being in once place at the same time then you would guess right off the bat.

To dig any deeper would head into spoiler territory and to be honest I think everyone should go into this as blind as possible, even more so for you younger people who wouldn’t know what the original source material is.  This might leave you on the outs with one of the final reveals in the movie but for us it was a loving little send-off from the film to the show.  

7.5/10

A Unique Spin on the Fantasy Genre

from the blog It Came From the 20th Century, filmmaker Jonathan R. Skocik:

Okay, strictly speaking, this falls outside the parameters of this blog, since it is not from the 20th century. However, I’m making an exception in this case because I want to help promote an excellent book that deserves to be read.

Elves, castles, magic, kings and queens, swordplay, imaginary languages – yes, we’ve seen all this before, and Alyssa Marie Bethancourt’s debut novel, Mornnovin has them in droves. That is not to say these elements are automatically tired in any way. There’s a reason we keep revisiting them. But in the wrong hands, they can admittedly feel stale or even silly. Fortunately, Ms. Bethancourt knows her genre, and navigates the material with ease. The best fantasy will make you forget that it’s fantasy, allowing you to completely buy in to what you’re reading. Mornnovin is such a novel. Beyond this, however, and perhaps more importantly, it gives us a wholly fresh perspective in that the author is autistic, and her elven characters are also coded as such.

Bethancourt’s elves are emotional basket cases. Their feelings run the gamut, their internal lives raging storms of passion, guilt, and self-recrimination, yet they are expected to maintain a veneer of stoicism that would make Mr. Spock proud, even to the point of making elaborate hand gestures to indicate their feelings rather than allow a genuine emotion to reach their faces. These elves are no Vulcans, though, and their ability to maintain this cool facade is, shall we say, less well-perfected than their sci-fi counterparts. This is, in fact, an amazingly on-point depiction of the autistic experience. People on the spectrum spend most of their lives learning to hide what they’re really feeling, having been told over and over that their expressions of emotion are inappropriate. For this reason, autistics are often viewed as cold, rude, and distant. But this is largely learned behavior, the only reaction that makes any sense when it seems like everything you do is wrong.

That Bethancourt’s autism stand-ins are literally not human reflects the feeling many on the spectrum experience of not really being a part of humanity, of being aliens in their own world. This is further illustrated by the state of isolation in which the elves of Mornnovin have placed themselves. They live in Evlédíen, also called the Valley, hidden away from the rest of the world to protect themselves from the humans who once tried to exterminate them. The Purification, as the humans call it, could be viewed as a parallel for the erasure experienced by autistic people every day. Often, the lives and perspectives of the autistic community are ignored. The clueless and ignorant have even gone as far as to say that autistic people are not even really people, and that those on the spectrum actually have no inner life, no genuine feelings or sense of identity. What is this if not a low-key extermination, if not in fact, at least in spirit?

Onto this stage emerges our heroine, Loralianasa Raia, nicknamed Lorien. Though she’s over a hundred years old, she’s only just on the cusp of adulthood in elf terms. As the crown princess whose parents have long-since been murdered, she now faces the unwelcome responsibility of ruling her people. To make matters worse, this coincides with a global war among the humans as well as a sinister plot that soon drags the elves back onto the world stage. Lorien now faces the almost unthinkable decision to expose the existence of her people to the rest of the world in an effort to save the very people who once brought them to the brink of extinction. This funhouse lens coming-of-age story perfectly illustrates the exaggerated gravity that an autistic person faces upon joining the adult world. In much the same way that Joss Whedon’s Buffy the Vampire Slayer used monsters as a metaphor for growing up and learning adult responsibility, so does Bethancourt use her fantasy landscape of imagined cultures in a global war engineered by a vengeful sorcerer.

Of course, no coming-of-age story would be complete without a romance, and Bethancourt does not fail to deliver the goods. The concept of lovers bound by a telepathic link has perhaps been done to death in numerous online fanfics, but this manages to feel fresh, perhaps because of the earnestness with which it is written. It might also have to do with how truly endearing the love interest is. Naoise (pronounced Nee-shuh) Raynesley is the prince of Grenlec, a kingdom at war with their longtime rival, Telrisht. We meet him in the first chapter and there’s instant sparkage with Lorien. He’s bright, kind, open-minded, thoughtful, and witty. Indeed, he borders on being a Mary Sue, though thankfully never quite crosses the line. By the end of their first encounter, Naoise and Lorien are mystically joined, and though separated afterward for a large chunk of the story, their love grows stronger and stronger through the psychic bond they don’t even know they share. Visiting each other in dreams, they become each other’s only solace from the hellscape their world has become – though Naoise arguably has it worse, being that he’s stuck on the front lines of a battle that seems frustratingly unwinnable for reasons that will eventually become ominously clear.

As the story unfolds, we’re introduced to a colorful cast of supporting characters as intriguing and memorable as anything offered up by J.K. Rowling, Marvel, or even Tolkien himself. There’s Lorien’s sister Lyn, who having been raised away from her people has never learned their stoicism and therefore expresses herself with some delightfully creative profanity. We’ve also got Naoise’s womanizing brother, who manages to be charming despite being a total heel; a mercenary named Cole who struggles to outlive his shady past; the brusque elf warrior Sovoqatsu questing to fulfill a sense of purpose; and Sefaro, a good-natured ambassador from a distant country who serves as the moral compass of the group. Aside from the main party, there’s Lorien’s taskmaster guardian, Tomanasil; Naoise’s overbearing father, King Lorn; and a mysterious fairy named Sun.

But the greatest gem, for me at least, is the villain, Kataki Kurome, a sorcerer grieving over the murder of his wife at the hands of the humans. He engineers the war between Grenlec and Telrisht as a way to thin the herd and lessen the task he’s set for himself of annihilating humanity. He easily could have been a thinly-written mustache twirler, but Bethancourt gives him depth, pain, and a cold civility that at once makes him relatable and utterly terrifying. His cold determination, detached sense of purpose, devious craftiness, and sheer power make him seem utterly unbeatable. This, coupled with his age and inflexibility make him the perfect foil for the young and idealistic Lorien, who was already overwhelmed by the adult world even before the shit hit the fan.

No character is ignored, and Bethancourt not only gives depth and individuality to all of her primary characters, but breathes life and personality into even the most minor characters. Such a task naturally requires a lot of breathing room, and Mornnovin is not a short book. But it never overstays its welcome, and indeed the epic scope of the proceedings demands the necessary space to unfold. Beyond that, the pace never wavers, and the novel’s bulk is never daunting. Quite the contrary. This is the kind of expertly-woven story that draws you right in and keeps you anticipating each new development. Mornnovin isn’t just one of the best fantasy stories I’ve ever read. It’s easily one of the best novels I’ve read in recent memory, and I eagerly await the next installment in the series, due out next year.

Mornnovin is printed by Dogwood House press and is available from all major online booksellers.

Full disclosure: I am married to the author. However, this is my honest assessment of the piece.

-- Jonathan R. Skocik

Gravity Falls Fic Rec List

In honor of Fanfiction Writer Appreciation Day, I’ve decided to compile a list of some of my favorite fanfics I’ve encountered thus far in the fandom! Please note that this list is not all-encompassing, and that even if you don’t see your fic here, if I have liked/kudoed/commented/reblogged your fic, that means I love it. Keeping this list a moderate length is already going to be difficult enough because holy cats this fandom has a lot of amazing writers!

Before the Bridges Burn by @endae

Summary: Canon Divergence from DAMvtF and the entirety of Weirdmageddon. Rather than being stopped by Ford and being encaged in front of Blendin, Dipper finds Mabel in the forest trapped inside her Dreamscape. He makes a deal with Bill to rescue Mabel, but with the risk of losing his life if he doesn't make it within the time restriction of Bill's game.

Why you should read it: Okay, so, Endae has this absolutely beautiful and heart-breaking way with words that really whacks you in the face with the Feels Stick from the get-go, and if you haven’t read anything by her yet, then you’re missing out. The angst is real, folks. Don’t take my word on it. Just go read it for yourself. Seriously. Currently the sequel is a WIP.

Fisherman’s Knot by @scribefindegil

Summary: Happy endings are messy, and the Arctic winter is more difficult than either Stan or Ford want to admit.

Why you should read it: Okay this is literally a fandom classic, and if you haven’t heard of it thus far, you must be new like I was. This fic is a gem. So much hurt and quite a few serious themes that you should make sure you’re ready for before you start. Also... tissues. Be sure to have tissues on hand... The fic is technically not finished, but where it leaves off is super satisfying and honestly works as an ending, so don’t worry, you don’t end on any horrifying cliffhangers.

Raising Stakes by @marypsue

Summary: 1982. A postcard from his estranged twin brother summons Stanley Pines halfway across the country to Gravity Falls, Oregon, where something sinister is brewing. Ford may have bitten off more than he can chew this time, but Stan's never been one to lie down and give up. And this time, he's got a new bag of tricks to try...

Why you should read it: Two words... Vampire AU! It’s super well-done, it has heart and jokes while also being appropriately sinister at certain points. Also, I love the interpretation of vampires and how they work. Beyond this fic itself, Mary is just a superb writer and really cranks out some amazing fics and AUs.

Lighthouse Keeper AU by @impishnature

Summary:  A beast lurks in the waters. Stan loses Ford to the waves, the lighthouse his only point of contact and hope of ever getting him back. …He used to love the sea, now it’s taken everything from him.

Why you should read it: Okay... This is another one where, if you haven’t read it, you must live under a rock. Super cool AU where the show takes place centered around a lighthouse instead of the Portal. Bill is creepy af, Ford’s means of being trapped are super rad and also super terrifying, and Stan is just such a good boy I love him so much. Imp also writes beautifully and has this amazing grasp of imagery and storytelling that is really astounding and paints these gorgeous pictures of what’s happening. Her stories will just have you completely enraptured, so go check out her stuff.

Some Sunny Day by @anistarrose

Summary: Time isn’t linear, Stan has a catchy piano tune stuck in his head, and blue flames threaten to consume the peace that the Pines family has found. Based off the Same Coin Theory.

Why you should read it: I’m going to be completely honest here: I’ve only read the first chapter of this so far. I know, I know, bad Nikki. But look, okay, the first chapter is super good, Rose’s Stan Twins are amazing and so in-character that is hurts, and Same Coin theory is just so cool to explore and play with. But Nikki, how can you rec something you’ve barely read? I can because I just know, alright. Rose writes really well, and even the first chapter had me completely invested (even if I haven’t had time to read the rest). So I’ll rec what I want, thank you very much. Currently a WIP.

1 Step Forward, 20 Years Back by @infriga

Summary: A Tale of Two Stans AU: Instead of fighting over the journal Stan tries to leave, but Ford isn't willing to let him go that easily. During the argument Stan comes into contact with a strange magical substance, and when he wakes up later he finds he's a bit smaller than he remembers. Now not only does Ford have to worry about Bill taking over the world, he also has to figure out how to turn his brother back to normal.

Why you should read this: This is another one that is a huge fandom hit, and for good reason. It’s got humor and imagination. Infriga’s writing is super nice and flows perfectly. Their grasp of the characters is spot-on, and they explore some really neat concepts and ideas in the fic. Really, just and all-around amazing fic that you should definitely read if you haven’t yet. (They also illustrate every chapter, and their art is spectacular).

by the skin of your teeth by @apathetic-revenant

Summary: In which Ford's attempt to survive entirely on caffeine and paranoia suffers some pitfalls, and things happen differently in 1982.

Why you should read it: This was literally the first fic I read for this fandom, and I still love it to this day. Ford’s a goddamn mess, Stan is the real MVP for taking all this BS and craziness in stride, and Fidds saves the day. Some rather dark themes interspersed with some comforting humor (lookin @ you, end of Ch2/beginning of Ch3). Plus, I am always in the mood for the boys figuring their problems out and bonding again. Good good stuff.

Cast Away (part 2) by @fordanoia

Summary: What happens when Stanley is the one to fall through the portal instead.

Why you should read it: Two chapters of absolute stress. Both of the boys are bad-ass in their own ways, and Stan gets some unexpected help (from something that canon really would have benefited from expanding upon). Really, an all-around awesome two-shot. Noia gets into the boys’ heads so well and writes them amazingly. Just... such a great read.

An Outreached Hand by @dubsdeedubs

Summary: On a cold winter's day in 1982, Stan Pines shows up at his brother's door with two cats tucked in his jacket and no heartbeat in his chest. (A sort-of Ghost Trick AU, but requires no previous knowledge of that to read.)

Why you should read it: Super neat concept. Really, this fic is so cool. Dubs’s writing is spectacular, and they instill this sense of mystery and foreboding into this story so seamlessly with little hits of humor here and there. Really, I can’t put into words how awesome this fic is. Just go check it out. Currently a WIP.

30 Seconds Later by @invisibletinkerer

Summary:  Stanford falls through the portal in 1982, but is pulled back almost immediately. Stanley, meanwhile, struggles for 30 years to bring his brother back. Neither is reunited with the brother they expect.

Why you should read it: Hooooo boy. This fic is about as angsty and painful as you would expect from reading the summary. It’s super well-written and the idea is so unique and honestly heart-breaking when you consider the implications. It just presents some new and interesting challenges for the gang to overcome and is a solid, interesting fic so far. Currently a WIP.

Okay I know I’m missing some, but these are some major highlights in my book and this post is starting to get ridiculously long RIP.

To everyone that writes, thank you for doing what you do. You all are amazing and loved and appreciated. The world would truly be a sad place without so many of amazing writers in it. Keep doing what you’re doing, and may the gods of inspiration rain every beautiful idea down on you, and may your fingers fly swiftly across the keys to compose beautiful tales each and every day. <3

Degtyarev Lair Review (#176329)

You had me at “Chernobyl, but with dragons.” Then, when I looked in your lair, you had a tank. Not a dragon who is tank-like in their size and strength, but a literal metal tank that shoots ice spears and has a clouddancer living on it. I do not know what magic I must have worked to bring your lair into my life but, holy smokes, this is probably the most unique lore turn I have ever seen on Flight Rising and is abso-freakin’-lutely a joy to go through. Special I-didn’t-choose-you-but-I-love-you-anyway to Flammenwerfer. He werfs flammen.

Anyway. Moving on.

Amaroq is an impressive Tundra anyway you turn it. Despite the normally cheerful and cute appearance of the breed, there’s just something intimidating about this bad boy. Maybe it’s the chains, maybe it’s the ghost tertiary, or maybe it’s just everything about him. I’m willing to bet it’s the latter.

I don’t know if it’s intentional, but everything about him screams “Gaoler.” I adore the use of his apparel, often clunky pieces that overwhelm a dragon used liberally without making him look too cluttered. I love how each piece coincides with his natural coloration, giving a cohesive look that seamlessly bleeds from armor to fur to scales to ice, always leading the eye and never disrupting the flow. And speaking of his coloration, I like the use of the dark, shining primary with the light, more matte tertiary. He very much looks like a skeleton frozen in a block of dirty ice, and that is a creepy aesthetic I can totally get behind.

You have a knack for making up some really nice Tundras, and Arkadiusz is no exception. Like Amaroq, he’s one hell of a flight rep with clever color matching and a very distinct personality about him. I like the colors chosen for him; anymore, you typically see copper or cyan or some combination of the two when it comes to Lightning representatives, so the use of darker blues with the carrot stain to further mute them is actually quite neat to see. It’s still very fitting and, in my opinion, complements the actual Lightning festival apparel better than the brighter hues that are more common. This is especially true with the aforementioned stained gene, which “browns” him down to match his outfit better.

Again, you did a kickass job of using more cluttered apparel without making the dragon look cluttered, which (in my experience) is very, VERY hard to do with the Lightning apparel. It all just covers so much, is typically bulky, and is very hard to match together (the coat and the more brassy “faux limbs” like his mechajets typically don’t look all too great combined). Yet, you subverted this by using the tome, with brighter metal bits that help tie the lighter golds of his feet in with the rest of his outfit. It’s a very clever move.

Beretta. Just… Beretta. I’m going in alphabetical order (because I saved all the dragons I wanted to use on my computer and it alphabetized them for me), but Beretta is hands down my favorite of your lair. She’s eye-catching and cleverly dressed, bright and oozing and downright radioactive. You can’t really get past her on your scout tab without having to click on her, because she’s just that goddamn unique. And that’s coming from somebody who hates pants on dragons. I’m willing to overlook them because holy shit.

Just, the use of smirch here to blend into her grasp apparel is incredibly smart move, and perfect. Combined with her plague accent, she just reeks of something impossible, grotesque, and harmful. Just the thumbnail of her--what with the focus of green on her snout and spreading away the further you go back, combined with the female Mirror posing--makes her look like some irradiated alien creature plummeting out of the sky like a comet made of pure nuclear waste. Just, she’s an A+ dragon and you should be very proud to have her because she’s amazing. Absolutely AMAZING.

JohannaCash caught my eye first in your lair because, after such a long time of sighing at cowboy dragons and never being able to find a way to make any of those frilly dress sets work, I found myself noticing her and going, “Oh, so that’s how you make it work.”

She’s a beautiful dragon, dressed in a way that I never thought would work out but rocking every bit of that apparel like a champ. Her colors go well with her outfit, said outfit is amazingly coordinated, and the female Skydancer posing keeps it from looking like a lump drowning in lace and ruffles. She gives off a very distinct “outlaw” vibe, and the color selection for her (mostly browns, I mean) almost lend an “1800s photograph” look to it. She looks like she was straight-up ripped from a Sornieth wanted poster. And don’t even get me started on how suiting her familiar is (jackalopes + western themed dragons = match made in heaven) or how clever the halo of flames is as a reference (as the bio says, “Ring of Fire, baby”). This is just… this is just an amazing dragon. She’s close to beating Beretta for first place.

Mauser is just a pleasing dragon to look at, and comes across as a lot more “chill” than some of your dragons. Maybe it’s the softer palette of browns or the hippie bead necklace, but she’s yet again one of those “dragons in pants” that I actually like.

First off, her colors are amazing and her genes complement them well. The contrast in her cherub make her lighter colors shine much brighter, and the selection of colors in her seraph do well to bring her outfit home, adding paler elements that coincide with her aviator scarf and arctic pants. I also like the elements of blue added by her steampunk goggles and her aforementioned “hippie beads,” as turquoise and brown are always a winning combination that is incredibly pleasing to the eye. Beyond that, the art in her bio is hella cute and, like her outfit, gives her a touch of personality that makes her all the more endearing.

Halfway done and we come to Nebulae, who is an amalgamation of everything people typically pick apart in a dragon as “bad” but somehow works. A lot of folks aren’t too keen on the original armor helms (well, “original” armor helms) or the use of gembond on a dragon, but I don’t think she’d have half as much of an impact without them. The “faceless guard” vibe she gives off is very intimidating, and the gembond meshes well with her icicle chains to give the impression of a dragon who is, quite literally, armored by the elements. It just makes her look rougher, tougher, and harder to take down, which I’m assuming is the intention considering her bio snippet.

Her colors are wonderful, too. Her primary is somehow very subtle, and it took me a while of staring to realize she wasn’t an entirely white dragon. Her apparel is placed perfectly so that the fade of her iridescent gives the impression of being a part of her armor. Even her fins and belly look more like they’re cast in shadow than actually charcoal. Additionally, going back to her icicle chains: they don’t look unnatural, like they do on a lot of other dragons. They match so well with her secondary that they essentially become a part of her, and it’s fabulous.

I have a weakness for Plague dragons, I won’t lie. Choosing Ruumis wasn’t just because she is gorgeous, but pure bias and legitimate awe at how good of a Plague dragon she is. She strikes a wonderful balance between beauty and brutality, being dolled up in the typical Wyrmwound fare while still flowing and retaining an air of elegance about her. In other words, she’s a very pretty dragon who looks like she’ll break every bone in your body.

Her colors and her apparel, again, match perfectly and I love the bleached, diseased look that her piebald and paint genes give her, as well as the curious way her genes make the gem on her forehead look. I was half convinced that had to be some kind of effect from her apparel or an accent, and had to take her to the scrying workshop to realize that “bullseye” look was just from paint. And, while her bio is still incomplete, I had a giggle at the bits that are done, including her implied methods of “punch first, negotiate later” and the fact she has all the charisma of a angry wolverine. It seems very, very fitting.

This girl looks like Mattel produced a cosmic horror and I love every bit of it. She’s a Barbie pink monster covered in daunting crystal spines, breathing out the void like smoke, with beady little Guardian eyes that seem to glow with the contrast given by her accent and her poison gene. I honestly don’t know what’s not to like here.

First of all, the shardhide shines on Guardians and it looks especially fitting on Sirli, especially considering the way the spikes fade from neon pink to darker purples, just like her poison and toxin. The cosmic gradient given to her by her accent also helps it “grow” into the rest of her, looking less like a piece of added apparel than bits of her actual default artwork that should be there. The touch of brighter purples with her sylvan apparel and tail feathers also add visual interest with pops of color that keep her from looking too flat, which I think was necessary considering the fact she’s a triple and the bulk of her apparel teeters on being the same color as she is. A wise decision that worked out very well.

I feel kind of bad that I keep fishing out of your scouts, but you have a lot of lovely Mirrors with Steyr being chief among them. It’s so infrequent to find a “classy” Mirror on the site, considering folks’ tendency to (understandably) bring out their ferocity or play to their Plague roots, and that creepy, fierce vibe would have been a pretty easy direction for you to go in considering her ghost tertiary (which, I honestly thought was part of her accent for a moment). And there is something certainly haunting to this beautiful girl, but she seems far more refined than sinister.

First of all, that accent when combined with her candles is amazing, since they play off of each other with the wisps of smoke and a near inversion of colors (black smoke on gold wings, gold smoke on black candles). The decision to go light on apparel was a wise one, too, as it keeps her from looking overly cluttered and lets her natural beauty shine through.

Additionally, on a fun note, I realized that Steyr is actually the older sister of my dragon, Zafirbel. It’s like Seven Degrees of Kevin Bacon, man, but with dragons!

Again, I love a good Plague dragon, and while I was impressed by Steyr’s diversion from the typical Mirror fare, half the reason I love Zverskiy so much is because he doesn’t just go for the trope. He owns it. This is, perhaps, one of the nicest Plague Mirrors I’ve ever seen, and as a former Plagueling myself, I’ve seen (and owned) a lot.

I don’t know exactly how to describe it, but he has a sort of “undead” vibe that straddles the line between lich and vampire. He looks fierce and menacing without resorting to the typical “bloody flesh beast” look that so many others go for (I say, while kicking my own so-called “skinless” Mirror under a rug). His cream ghost tertiary goes so well with that accent that I had to double-check my own dragon in said skincent to see what was or wasn’t a part of it, and he rocks that carapace arm like nobody would believe. I’m most impressed of all by just how hodge-podge his apparel is, coming from a half-dozen different sets that I would have never thought to mix, but creating a cohesive and intimidating outfit that makes him seem ready for war. Dude’s a 100%, Grade-A monster, and that’s just wonderful.

Gravity Rush 2 Review! (Spoiler free!)

Disclaimer: I haven’t played the first game. Although now I really want to. 

I bought GR2 when it was on sale on the ps store and oh boy, do I have good instincts. I had been intriguied by this franchise for a while now and I had tested the demo, only to find the gravity thing a bit overwhelming - almost irritating at that time. But I couldn’t miss that chance, so I plunged into this adventure with little to no knowledge of what was about to happen to me. 

GR2 follows Kat, a gravity shifter girl. Here people (or women? because I haven’t seen a man doing it) can gravity shift: this means they control gravity, and can do with it as they please. Flying (more like being attracted to somewhere with gravity, but let’s call it flying), levitate things, speed through the air, pierce through things, lift heavy things, etc. These poweres are granted by a creature called guardian, a little animal made of stardust unique to each of the gravity shifters. Of course Kat has Dusty, a cat, who will be our silent but too beautiful to be true companion for the whole game. 

Kat awakens in a new town with no memory at all of her past and only Syd as the sole friend who was dragged with her into this. After a huge gravity storm (the ending of GR1 I presume), she disappeared alongside Syd and were stranded for a while, until the Bangha Settlement found them and put them to work in their mines. Kat has one purpose now: to return to Hekseville, to Raven, her best friend (though many would say there was something more between these two girls - I SHIP IT) and to her memories. But Syd doesn’t seem to help her much, at least at first glance, so it’s up to her to find her way around. 

From here on out, the game opens for you: it’s an open world, full of side missions, mines to explore, navi to kill, and people to meet. You can do whichever side mission you wanna do before diving into the main story missions, you can fully take your time collecting gems to improve Kat’s abilities, or you can just waste time flying around the buildings. You do whatever you want! The freedom it gives you it’s really fullfilling, for I never felt rushed to do anything and I did everything at my own pace. 

The story is divided into three well separated arcs, and each one is unique and spellbinding in their narrative. It feels like you’re playing three different installments in the franchise, as the three of these arcs cover very different themes and topics, and also maps. But there is a thread connecting all these arcs, and it’s amazingly well done. 

The narrative relies heavily on comic-book like scenes: panels with written dialogues and so on. This on itself may seem lazy, but it adds a lot of personality to the game. It’s like they’re telling you “we like comics and this is how we do things” and I applaud that attitude. Of course you have cutscenes, but they’re scarce, and major plot points are told through comic panels, so if you don’t dig this style you may not like the game at all. 

What’s more interesting and remarkable is the gameplay. You actually control gravity, like I said, and ar first it may look difficult, unnecessarily inconvenient, and too clunky. I’m not lying, it takes time to get used to it, but once you do it, MAN it’s so fun! You can go ANYWHERE flying. And when I say anywhere, I mean it: anything you find flying or floating or that seemingly far away building, you can reach it. Whatever you lie your eyes upon, you can get there. Sometimes I didn’t even use the teleport points because it was more fun to go there flying. The whole air is playable: you know when you’re playing an open world game, that you encounter these invisible walls that wouldn’t let you advance there? Well, forget about those here: you can literally fall from one building and arrive safe and sound to a new map (it happened to me a few times!). You lose yourself in this neverending sky, full of possibilities. 

The full of possibilities include side missions. They’re 49 in total, and I recommend doing some of them. They’re fun, they add some backstory to many secondary characters, but some of them can be really frustrating, so my opinion here is kinda divided. What I must say is that these side missions help you grow your maximum level, so if you’re having a bad time with a main story mission, maybe you’ll need to grind with the side ones, as it is the only way of expanding your hp and gravity deposit. 

Your gravity powers grow over the course of the game, allowing you things you couldn’t do before. For instance, you can learn two more styles of gravity, so you’ll have the lunar gravity (light), normal gravity and jupiter (heavy). All of these styles have different gameplay, and you can change between them on the fly, so you’re able to create your own strategy that best fits the situation. 

Besides, if anything of what I’ve just said still didn’t convince you, the guys who developed this game (SIE Japan Studio) are already 80% better than the rest of the companies, because you can download for free a few outfits and (listen) a whole playable episode for Raven, Kat’s friend, for FREE. I repeat: a whole playable episode of a few hours long, for free! Square Enix, take that! 

The ending was bittersweet and the final boss had me like screaming YEAAAH a thousand times. The level of epicness was over 9000. Also, goddamn. The colors of this game. It looks AWESOME. My aesthetics were high as hell. My share button is burnt with how many times I pressed it. 

Alright, alright, not everything’s a bed of roses. In fact, I have a few critiques, most involving some of the main story “dungeons”. Sometimes during the story you’ll have to go through some dungeons in which you must undertake a challenge and complete it with certain requirements to advance. This isn’t a problem, except when they’re forcing you to use one of the gravity styles from above. There’s one specific dungeon I had a terrible time with, in which they forced me the heavy gravity style on me, and I had to fly fast through narrow tunnels. The camera was a pain during this quest, because it goes crazy if you’re cornered in a tiny space, not allowing you to see where you must go. And I was going against a clock, so it was really irritating. I had a few ragequits during this part. 

But if you struggle through these things, you’ll find a gem. This game is fun, I don’t remember the last time I had so much fun playing something. And Kat is such an endearing protagonist: she’s all heart, but she’s not stupid, and towards the end, her whole persona becomes even more important and intriguing. 

Just so you know: when you first see the credits, that’s not the ending folks. You still have one third of the game to play. 

If you have the money and the time, give Kat a shot. I’d love to see this franchise expand. I’ve been told sales weren’t good, so it’s unlikely we’ll receive a third installment, but well, one can dream! That’s why I want people to know about this game. Let the good news spread! PLAY A FUN GAME! 

PS: fyi, 90% of the cast are female characters. That’s amazing. Like really, women power is present here. Go support your female protagonists! 

Fight Fire with Fire

Many films fly under the radar and are in and out of theaters in the blink of an eye. Though it can be warranted (due to poor sales or downright awfulness), occasionally an underrated gem simply goes unnoticed by the masses.

“Free Fire” is one of the better films of 2017 and should get a well-deserved second chance on the rental market once word-of-mouth praise begins circulating.

Currently, “Free Fire” holds a 67% rating on Rotten Tomatoes, which does mean the film is certified fresh (positively endorsed), but just barely (anything 59% or lower is considered rotten). However, the still fairly low rating should not deter you, especially when you consider “Suicide Kings” (34%) and “The Boondock Saints” (20%) have ludicrously negative reviews, but are still beloved cult classics. Like those two films, “Free Fire” is a comparable style of movie that could easily follow in their footsteps.

A couple of criticisms of “Free Fire” are that it’s a rip-off of a Guy Ritchie or Quentin Tarantino film. Aside from the accents, I think it’s a stretch to say the film mirrors Ritchie, but the Mexican standoff setting inside a warehouse definitely resembles Tarantino’s “Reservoir Dogs.” However, what really makes “Free Fire” stand out is that it takes place entirely in one setting and manages to keep you invested for 90 minutes.

Though much of the film takes place in a warehouse in “Reservoir Dogs,” the audience got a look at what led up to the heist gone bad thanks to flashbacks. However, aside from the first five minutes, which take place right outside of the warehouse, “Free Fire” spends the rest of the film in one location.

A one-setting film is a daunting task for a writer/director since they must figure out how to keep their audience entertained. This is why most films follow the formula of constant changes of scenery since people would rather watch a movie that has multiple action sequences, car chases, and love scenes instead of staring at actors in a room. But, when done astutely, it’s hard not to respect a one-setting film.

“Free Fire” is set in the late seventies and revolves around an illegal gun sale inside an empty warehouse that’s been arranged by mediator Justine, played by recent Oscar winner, Brie Larson. On one side is Frank (Michael Smiley) and Chris (Cillian Murphy), who have come with their group to buy M16’s for the IRA. Vernon (Sharlto Copley) and Ord (Armie Hammer) represent the selling side and are the shot callers for their group of businessmen. The transaction is immediately off to a rocky start due to egos, but the tension escalates when Chris confronts Vernon about supplying the wrong type of rifle. Despite the mix-up, the IRA side agrees to still buy the guns and delivers their payment in full.

As the guns are being exchanged, a dispute over a prior incident erupts, leading to shots being fired and everyone diving for cover. Amazingly, the zany shootout, full of comedy and violence, manages to last the rest of the movie.

Days later, I am still so impressed that a shootout could make up 95% of a movie. It’s completely illogical that a one-trick pony movie should be so satisfying, but I literally just watched the trailer while writing this to again relive the chaos. “Free Fire” could have easily fallen apart, but Ben Wheatley’s direction and the colorful cast keeps it from becoming monotonous. Along with its stylish delivery, the lack of blockbuster stars really benefits the film. Obviously Larson is the biggest name, and she shines as the only female in the film, but I couldn’t imagine watching Tom Cruise or Ben Affleck playing any of the male roles. Although you will recognize a few faces – Hammer played the twins in “The Social Network” – their smaller celebrity status makes them so much more believable onscreen. Plus, their equal rank creates great chemistry.

The onscreen chemistry is most obvious in the way the players communicate with one another while pinned down by gunfire. Given the intimate situation, guys on the same side can strategize with one another while also mocking their enemies, which leads to many great lines. The insults and expletives fly through the air just as fast and frequently as the bullets.

I can imagine that watching “Free Fire” is gratuitous action director Michael Bay’s worst nightmare. To him, this film is probably the equivalent of a documentary or silent film and he would only be able to sit through it if he was forced to like Alex in “A Clockwork Orange.” That right there should convince you to take a chance on this unconventional shoot ‘em up.  

/slams hands on table. Hi guys, it's me, your friendly neighborhood Silas and I love Jack Sparrow. I finally got my Kindle working today which means I have access to The Price of Freedom which means I can bring up one of my biggest issues with Jack in the new movie. Jack Sparrow demanding tributes.

Now, it goes without saying that Jack has never demanded tributes from his crew before. Rewatch any movie, including On Stranger Tides, and at no point, ever, does Jack Sparrow ask for money from any of his crew. At no point, ever, does Jack turn to William Turner and say "Thanks for saving me from the gallows buddy, but I do have a 10 guinea rescue fee and I'll take that right now." At no point, ever, does Jack turn to Hector Barbossa and Gibbs and say "I just saved our lives from the powers of the East India Trading Company and Davy Jones combined. I'll take your hat and the shirt off your back." The fact that they would do this and make this a change in his character is amazingly absurd. I do not blame Gibbs and the rest of them for walking away. I'm shocked that was all they did. If this had been in any other movie, he would have been mutinied. This is not something a pirate captain does. Which brings me to my next point: Jack Sparrow does not care about money. "But Silas!" I hear you cry. "Jack's a pirate! He has to care about money!" Well, okay. Jack cares about money insomuch as it is a means to an end. Money buys him wenches like Scarlett and Giselle. Money buys him repairs on the Pearl. Money buys him rum. But Jack doesn't care about money just to have money. Not in the way they portray him in Dead Men Tell No Tales. You know how I know? Have some screencaps:

In this scene, as you can see, Gibbs and the crew are confronting Jack because Jack, as captain, has not been going out and finding ships with money for them to plunder. There's even talk of mutiny over it.

Even when Jack was raiding the treasure that Barbossa had gathered for ten years under the curse, what does he end up taking in the end?

Just a lot of jewelry. Jack does like jewelry. Have you seen how many rings he wears at all time? There are four of them. Not to mention the beads in his hair. He takes accessories from Barbossa's treasure hoard, not money.

NOT TO MENTION this passage from the Price of Freedom:

"So Christophe indeed took the ordinary rock I cast an illusion spell on this morning?" "Yes," said Apedemak. "For all the good it will do him. He will not live long enough to enjoy the real treasure he took with him." She glanced over at Jack's duffel. "My Lord Apedemak," Amenirdis said, hesitantly, "should I go and take the real stone out of Jack's back? Perhaps conceal it, and thus protect it?" "If you do that, my handmaiden," Apedemak said, "will you not wonder all your life whether he was a good man, or one who would have betrayed you?" Amenirdis nodded. "I accept your wisdom, Lord," she said. [ ... ] Jack climbed to his feet, then helped her up. He picked up his duffel, then the coil of rope, and, finally, picked up his sack containing his collection from the treasure piles. "Shall we?" Smiling, he held out his hand to Amenirdis. The princess gave him a wan smile as she took his hand. Together, they started across the dust-scuffed floor, heading for th exit. She walked slowly, head down, shoulders slumped; he was nearly towing her along. "You seem really tired, love," Jack began, "so maybe you should go back to the palace and take a nap before we--" Breaking off, Jack snapped his fingers. "Oh, wait. I'm forgetting! Hold on a second, love." Setting down his sake of treasure, he untied his duffel, reached in, and withdrew the big, pale-green stone, then turned around and trotted back, crossing the center of the labyrinth. When he reached the statue of the lion-god, Jack carefully placed the Heart of Zerzura back on the golden outstretched palm.

Some backstory for those who haven't read it (and if you haven't, you absolutely should. It tells the story of how Jack and Barbossa met, as well as Jack's entire history with Cutler Beckett. It does Jack's backstory justice -- much better than the movie did, but that's for another time): Amenirdis is a princess of an island called Kerma, and island that is ridiculously hard to find. Cutler Beckett wants to find this island and make everyone on it slaves. The Heart of Zerzura is a big-ass green gem, that uses illusions to hide the island from Beckett and from everyone else. Jack had a chance to steal the gem. As you can see, Amenirdis did nothing to stop Jack. He could have easily walked out with it, sold it to the highest bidder and been fucking rich, but what does he do? He puts it back. Because 👏 Jack! 👏 Doesn't! 👏 Care!👏 About! 👏 Money! I don't know why the writers decided to go this route when there's been no precedence for it before. It almost seems like these new writers had no idea how to write for Jack Sparrow and so they just made shit up off the top of their head. It's so lazy, honestly, especially because it's self-contained in this movie and this movie alone. I could write a better Jack Sparrow than the one that was in that movie, if only because I remember everything that happened in the previous movies.

Lost Property

During the night, I send Mildred - oh yeah, I turned Malcolm into a spider after Niles kicked him to death, the twat - to scout Niles’ tent and see what he’s doing with our map. He spends quite a few hours with it, fixing mistakes on his own map and generally studying it. Yawn. Zaphiel, Marduk and I have a team huddle and decide we’re going to grab the map and run.

When Niles finally retires, he locks the map in a lockbox at the end of his bed. My specialty. Zaphiel casts invisibility on me and I sneak in. I decide that breaking into the box is probably safer than trying to pickpocket the key - who sleeps with a key in their pocket? - and I succeed amazingly, as I always do. I take our map, and see two other smaller locked boxes. One sounds like it could have gems in it, and the other one is pretty heavy. I take the lighter of the two as recompense for our mental anguish and loss of canoes. Might as well earn something while I’m here.

While that’s happening, Zaphiel disguises himself as the day guard, and relieves the night guard of his duty. Smart man. We all meet up at one of the guard posts and lower ourselves off the wall into the disgusting sewage. I had to hold my breath wading through that or I surely would have purged my stomach all over Marduk. As soon as we’re clear of the camp, I feverishly prestidigitate everyone clean. Phew! Well, now we should carry on traveling to the place east of Mbala - Orolunga? Right now, that’s our only lead about the death curse. Poor Syndra only has about fifty days left. We need to get a move on!

On our travels, we notice another Emerald Enclave perch in the canopy. One of them recognises us from a couple weeks ago, and we’re offered wine and sanctuary. Perfect. The Enclave folks kindly tell us that we’ve been travelling in the wrong direction, and they tell us how to get to Mbala. They also mention that Orolunga is a ziggurat, so that should hopefully be easy to find. We also notice a strange floating island to our east. I want to see what’s going on there. First things first, though.

That night, we find ourselves in the way of a fleeing giant boar, who is running away from a pack of raptors. Sadly, they all turn their sights to us, so we despatch them, but not after Zaphiel is almost brought down by the boar. Ouch! After dusting ourselves off and having a well deserved and cleaner night’s rest, we carry on our way to Mbala. Oh, and I checked that lockbox I stole, it had three greater healing potions and three potions of heroism in it! Considering our current state, that is a lot better than gems.

While hacking and slashing through the dense undergrowth, we disturb a very strange creature. It’s a giant cat, but it has snake heads as well as a cat head. I’ve read about these before, I’m pretty sure it’s a kamadan! It looks so cool, but so scary! We defeat it, and we realise that it is a female which has recently given birth. She must have a den somewhere; maybe there are some kittens! I run off and start searching aimlessly while my manly barbarian friend easily finds the den, and it does indeed contain kittens. There is also a pile of humanoids inside the den, some dead, some alive. I’m too distracted by the kittens, though. They don’t have their snake heads yet and they’re already as big as Malcolm! I want to keep one!

The next thing I felt was claws sinking into my back, and a pulse of pain from several small pairs of fangs. And all went dark.

I wake up, flat on my face, to find that daddy kamadan has come to protect his young. Holy hells, that was painful. I get myself out of the way and help take this one down too, but papa cat nearly downs Zaphiel too. I’m starting to realise the error of my ways, but I was just distracted by the idea of cute kittens! I’ve wanted a new pet since Malcolm died; conjuring him as a familiar just isn’t the same.

One dead male kamadan later, we pause to catch our breath. Well, I did. Zaphiel came up to me and slapped me in the face! What?! I mean, I know I did something stupid by going after the kittens, but I don’t think I deserved that! Dejected, I try to hug Zaphiel and thank him for saving my life, but he doesn’t seem to be in the mood at the moment. Thanks for making me feel like a jerk, you jerk.

Marduk and I check out the den while Zaphiel fumes. We find four dead adventurers and two tabaxi who we recognise as River Mist and Flask of Wine. Shit. I’m pretty sure Istimar mentioned that these guys are Zhents. I need to be careful around them! We wake Flask of Wine up, and he mutters something about a witch in Mbala and coming back as a zombie - weird - and it soon becomes clear that we woke up the wrong cat. He seems a bit special, the bad kind of special. We decide to loot the dead adventurers, it’s not like they’ll need their gear anymore. We find a few magical items! Jackpot! A few identifications reveal a vicious rapier (mine!), a furious maul, and some glamoured studded leather. That leather is perfect for my pal Zaphiel! Hopefully he appreciates me identifiying it for him.

We’re all pretty much spent now, so we decide to take an hour to rest and wait for the other tabaxi to wake up. Maybe these two catmen can get us to Mbala, since the grey one seems to like it so much.

Y NOT FESTIVAL!!!

Head of tape returns and gets promoted to head of signs too. Stay tuned for the full story.

So after 1 day at home I head back out to Y Not festival. Once arriving at Cromford train station I genuinely thought I was going to be mugged by fairies, if you have ever been to that dainty station you will thoroughly understand. After paying £25 for a taxi to sight I was there and first thing I will mention is how beautiful the surrounding area was. We were quite literally in the middle of nowhere, with the landscape being absolutely stunning.

Upon arrival I was starving but the beautifully wonderful Cal and Em saved me lunch from catering which I think really shows how beautiful those 2 are as the pudding that day was absolutely to die for, it was chocolate lasagne, that’s the best I can describe it to you. Once I’d filled my tummy the wonderful Flynn aka Finley helped me with the tent set up, this time we had a table in the middle of all our tents which was great as it really felt like a family camping weekend haha.

There were some new faces joining us for Y Not to which we all greeted with big smiles. Wednesday was kind of the slow day, making some of the riders up but mainly dividing and labelling the wines. And of course organising the fridges so obviously the trusty production line was back, and boy did the team work result in the dream work yet again.

Before I fully get into this post I think I should address the cat in the room, that is the headlines that have been circling this years Y Not festival. And honestly after this past weekend talking to someone who works in crowd management and hearing how even they, who were not even on sight thought that everything that could possibly be done had been, kind of reassured all the negativity that I heard despite knowing fully well that everyone on sight handled it to the best of the abilities at hand.

So this festival began on Thursday, only a limited amount of acts were performing that day, making it have a relaxed feel before the storm ahead. The weather was beautiful, spirits were high and it all ended on such a fab note with Feeder headlining, who might I add were bloody insanely fantastic. Also want to give a shout out to a band called The Skints who performed on Thursday. Just generally fab people on and off stage and honestly some of the most genuine performers I met all weekend. Would highly recommend checking them out if ska/reggae is your thing, or even if it isn’t they just infect the audience with a posi, bobbing vibe and the way they incorporate the sax, just fab.

What I loved about Wednesday and Thursday was the camp site and how relaxed everyone was, bonding over cards and some left over wine from riders at truck, just gonna add here the wombats have fantastic taste in wine, so thanks guys for not drinking it(:

Friday was upon us, aka the first day of the what would turn into a messy weekend. Did it actually stop raining on this day? I don’t think it did and it honestly got to the point where I was so soaked through to the bone I lost all motivation to actually attempt to stay out of the rain, because quite frankly that was impossible. I also fell down the ramp to the Quarry stage, causing myself to be covered in mud, before 12pm! I think that was a strong hint as to how the rest of the weekend would go ahah.

So I was placed on the Quarry stage where acts such as Idris Elba, Twin Atlantic, Frank Turner, new found love of Banfi and the fantastic Everly Pregnant Brothers were set to slay the stage. On Friday I was on my own, artist liaison wise on that stage until my side kick Lauren arrived that evening. Friday was a smooth day, other than a little bump thanks to security, it went calmly to plan. We were all A ok as far as dressing rooms went this day, despite the weather making life a little bit harder for us all(: Shout out to Frank Turner who was an absolute gem, and genuine humble guy!

As you can see in the image above this is what Lauren and I had to go by on the Quarry stage. All 6 dressing rooms would be labelled on the doors each morning with timings and which bands would be in there. This simplified and made our lives so much easier through this little piece of paper. This also came in super handy on Saturday when our dressings rooms got a little messy so some jiggling around had to be done. This piece of paper helped us get riders and dressing rooms prepared in plenty of time, and quite frankly was a little life saver.

In this post I want to highlight some acts that really stood out to me that I got to catch on Friday the Everly Pregnant Brothers graced the Quarry and wow they held the audience fantastically we were all blown away as to how loved they were, it's great to watch an audience really love something and this was a performance that stuck out majorly. I will be posting a clip of their performance separately to this post as I can not quite figure out how to include it in here lol.

I also got to catch the amazingly brilliant Heck and Bury Tomorrow on the Nest stage, firstly if you like heavier music, Heck are an absolute MUST SEE LIVE they're honestly brilliant with their performance, slaying each and every time. I honestly don't think most of the audience was quite prepared for what was going to be witnessed ahaha.

Bury Tomorrow blessed us all at Y Not as well as Truck and I somehow ended up singing with them, CRAZY I know, especially because I can't sing but I am still on a massive high from it because they're such a big band in British metal. As per usual they were fantastic!

 Saturday was not a great day at all, not for anyone. The ground was a mess, not surprising due to the mass of people and the crazy downpour of rain the day before, luckily though it would be dry until late afternoon, this was appreciated by a lot of people. This picture below was taken out the back out the Quarry stage. This made walking to the stage from the dressing rooms a bit of an effort(

 My feet this day were not in a great place either, little tip for you all, it may be a clever idea to go out and buy walking boots to wear on a festival site but keep in mind you WILL need to wear them in prior to the event, other wise your feet with be ruined. And we do not realise how much we take those parts of our body for granted until its too late. Just coming from an idiot that made that very mistake. so obviously that did not bode well.                                                                       If you read the Truck blog, would recommend in doing so if not you will remember the brief mention of Deaf Havana's rock and roll moment of damaging their dressing room, well that dressing room was put up on the quarry stage, to which the act Cast were put in on Friday evening, lovely people I must say but despite their age, they were party animals still, quite clear from the aftermath of said dressing room. I did cover the holes in said room to make it look semi- presentable for them, covering them up to look a slight bit better did work, fear not. But Saturday morning came with chocolate cake everywhere, and I mean everywhere and not just cake but anything and everything that was on their rider. It was VILE. Smudged into the holes on the floor in empty bottles, food and drink covered the walls, I don't think I have ever seen anything quite like it. So obviously with everyones dampened mood this was just the cherry on the icing for myself and Lauren(: But it's the nature of the job and we battled through slowly cleaning and taking breaks to make it seem not that bad.

Here is the only picture I snapped of I think Lethal Blizzle's dressing room, couldn't be too sure on that, but this kind of highlights the layout of riders once displayed in the dressing rooms. I'm very annoyed with myself that I did not snap a pic of the amazing job of bunting I did, the wind and rain did not defeat me there (:

Due to the weather the main stage was unfortunately juggled around massively, but us lot on the quarry stage didn't mind too much as it meant we got main stage acts put on ours, when I say we were happy, it is manly due to the fact the lovely Mr Motivator was put on early Saturday morning and my god did he quite literally lift everyones spirits up, I can not scream this from the top of my lungs enough. So of course we danced along side stage and had to get a team pic, it was only right(: Team Quarry Fam!

 To lighten up the mood of this blog, because to be honest despite the downside of this festival a lot of good things came from it. I honestly believe Mr Motivator brought the goodness. On the Quarry stage we had BBC introducing acts, to be honest I had never heard of any of them prior but good gracious me were some of them insane, and need to be mentioned. First up Oddity Road, I don't think you will find anyone who caught them that would disagree with me when I say they were insane live, and completely owned the audience and stage, their stage presence and sound for an up and coming band was shocking and I could not quite believe how little time they had been together, they reminded me of a rockier version of the Vamps.

Unknown Era also graced our stage on Saturday and wow they were nuts, If you like reggae, ska, punk, indie sounding music defo give them a listen, or maybe hit them up on youtube as it's worth watching a live performance as they were sick, and really were having a fab time. Also shout out to their outfits because their style was on point, must have been freezing but they looks lit.

My new found love of Banfi also blessed our stage on Saturday, just the 3 of them rocked up again to Y Not and sweeped the stage away with their soft, catchy tunes.

Yet with an up comes a down and boy did Lethal Blizzle bring the down, obviously he didn't quite literally do anything wrong but his set went from buzzing to dead, quite literally and that's when the real shit kicked off. I came back from getting Idris Elba's managers pizza and was trying to get through the Quarry tent to get back stage when I was hit with the crowd evacuating the tent, obviously being very confused as to what was going on the worse things pass your mind especially when there are 3 girls on the floor, going to skip the deets but scary shit happens at festivals and its honestly made me think about drinking the water sent out at shows in future because you can never be too careful, trust me. I also think if you have not realised how muddy it was at this time this is also the set we had a guy break his leg in the mud, lovely, absolutely spectacular. But this is when security was the tip of the cake for us, and the 5 of us on the quarry stage had to act as security which was a massive pee take omg.

So as you can probably tell the rest of Saturday ended on a sour note, and our moods needed another motivator lift(:

  I woke up on Sunday morning and honestly struggled so much to get out of bed, however the thought that the wonderful Twin Atlantic were on my stage, made the effort worth it as the whole TA team the previous week were fab. This was a factor that honestly got us all up that day. Once at the liaison cabin I discovered that the night had been long for a few of the team due to the making of the heavy decision of cancelling the final day of Y Not and honestly I can not stress how relived I was that it was shut off early. The right decision had fully been made as the resources just were not there to carry on in the state we and the site itself were in. So with that news came that fab team work ethic everyone had, we all put on our hi-vis and headed out to direct the public to car parks, pic up points and buses, as quite honestly security were not there to do so. This was fantastic, the sun was actually out, a bit too out as I got majorly burnt on my face, which did not go visually well with a very tired looking face on the train home, a few people stared too long (: This role was enjoyable I must say, talking to the public and realising that they did have a great time and helping those really struggling drag their luggage through the mud. Obviously with happy customers ca some negative ones but nothing a smiley face couldn't fix. And what I loved most was how everyone just had a bloody smile on their faces, despite the reason we were all their navigating punters it didn't matter. Lunch was distributed to us on which was a blessing and it realy just puts a massive grin on my face thinking back to it as despite all the shit we went through that weekend this day was like the weight had been lifted and we all just bonded and got on with it anyway(:

So with the punters away it was down to us to either leave or stay in the glamping tents till Monday, I chose to head home, my bed was calling for me and with that Y Not was over. Let's just hope next year's rolls a little smoother ahaha(:

 Roll on 2Q Lincoln in October ayeee(:

Antic Face School Play – Oliver Dench – Photo credit gbphotos.com

Alex Mackeith’s debut play – School Play, at Southwark Playhouse from 6th February and running until the 25th February 2017. The play is set against the backdrop of an education system in turmoil, and asks what it means to be a Primary School teacher in contemporary Britain and was inspired by his time working as a tutor.

Oliver Dench plays Tom. Theatre credits include The Witch Of Edmonton (RSC), Romeo And Juliet (Permanently Bard), Hamlet (Revolve Theatre Company), Much Ado About Nothing and Romeo And Juliet (Reading Between The Lines), A Christmas Carol (Reading Repertory Theatre); and for television, Ride.

Oliver recently answered some questions about his career and School Play.

Q: What attracted you to be a part of this production? Oliver: Something I find thrilling about the work of antic | face is their commitment to their mission statement. Not only do they create work with a strong sense of purpose, they do incredibly well to begin to redress the gender imbalance that pervades not only theatre, but the rest of the artistic (and indeed non-artistic) world. I saw their previous show (‘For Those Who Cry When they Hear The Foxes Scream’) at the Tristan Bates Theatre several months ago and was very impressed.

I’ve also worked with our director, Charlie Parham, once before on a one-man show in Nice. I think he might be a bonafide genius. I’d jump at the chance to work with him again. And that’s not even addressing my interest in the particular themes of this production…

Q: What are your own personal processes with regard to ‘getting into the character’ and learning lines? Oliver: My Grandad once gave a lovely metaphor about acting. He explained that he viewed the process like gem cutting. Each human being is a large, rough diamond, or block of beautiful marble. Or something else extraordinarily metaphorical and pretentious. Inside that rough stone, there is a beautiful sculpture or cut gem that is your character. The process of finding that character is working out what aspects inside yourself are present in the character, and which attributes may need sharpening and heightening.

For Tom, in particular, there were a few things I needed to research. For example, unlike him, I didn’t attend a public school – I needed to find out what precisely that may have been like, and how it may have affected him. So I made sure to talk to my friends who had attended such a school, and some students who are currently part of one. That seems very obvious… because it is, really. You can’t start pretending to be someone else until you know who that someone else is.

In terms of learning lines, nothing beats speaking them out loud. Running them with someone. Annoying my housemates at home. Speed runs with the cast. I’d love to say there was something magical about it, or some trick through which you can completely circumvent the process, but I’d be lying. Repetition makes perfection. Repetition makes perfection. Repetition makes perfection. Repetition makes perfection. Repetition makes perfection.

Q: You play the part of ‘Tom’ – what can you tell us about him and how he fits into the storyline? Oliver: Obviously he’s the hero. No, that’s not quite true. Tom attended Winchester school, followed by Oxford. He studied economics and achieved a double first. His mother was a teacher at Winchester when he was attending. That much the script gives us. In terms of behaviour, he tends to find situations get away from him. Maybe he over-thinks things. Maybe he’s a little awkward.

He has had a few thoughts about the purpose of education, and how exactly this purpose fits into the system we currently have. A lot of Tom’s personal journey through the play is about how these ideas fit into the situation or school in which he finds himself.

As I’m playing Tom, I have to fight his corner and say that he really is in it for the right reasons; he wants to help the kids. His motivations are basically unselfish. Though I’m not certain every other character in the play would agree.

Q: What is at the heart of School Play – and why should people get along to see it? Oliver: School Play (as the name suggests) is about a School. It’s a beautiful work (that’s the first reason to go and see it) that very reasonably and realistically explores the issues being faced by the education system today (second reason.) Frankly, I’m still in awe of Alex MacKeith’s ability to explore the issues with such an outrageously fine toothed comb, while retaining a sense of realism, and even some pretty fantastic character development and story telling (If I were to try, it would probably end up more of an essay than a play.) I suppose at the heart of it, it discusses what it means to be a teacher, and the disconnect between the tumultuous education policies and their application. (One final set of parenthesis before we finish. This overuse of brackets is why I’m not a playwright).

Concerning why people should see it – have you ever been in School? Do you think they’re worth thinking about? Do you have kids who might be in school now? Do you think education matters? These are things we need to consider as a society. And School Play might just give us a great springboard for doing so.

Antic Face School Play: Ann Ogbomo, Fola Evans-Akingbola, Charlie Parham and Oliver Dench – Credit gbphotos.com

Q: How much does School Play reflect issues in the current educational system? Oliver: Like a bloody mirror. Or, if we’re being pedantic, I hope I’m not ruining anything by saying it’s set in the summer of 2017 – so if anything, it’s ahead of its time. Alex MacKeith and antic | face’s research has been amazingly thorough. From what I can tell, and according to the teachers with whom I’ve spoken, the plays reflection is picture perfect.

Q: What do you hope the audience will get from watching School Play? Oliver: Like any great theatre, I hope that it provokes debate. The wonderful thing about writing characters means you can come at an issue from a number of different angles. I hope different audience members come out with different sympathies. Identify with different characters. It’s not the job of this play to be over didactic, or polemic (Charlie Parham taught me that word.) It’s the job to explore, and allow the audience to come to their own conclusions. Hopefully, people will come out debating. And maybe, if I’ve done my job right, someone might be fighting Tom’s corner.

Q: With regard to you personally, what do you find the most rewarding aspect of performing on stage? Oliver: There’s a wonderful freedom to performing on stage, which doesn’t really have a parallel on the screen. Of course, there are strengths to each medium, but it’s lovely on stage to try your best to inhabit the moment. It’s really hard. And I rarely succeed. It’s very easy to get tied up in your own headspace, or confused with how you did things before. But there’s something wonderfully rewarding about finally getting to a space when you are sure of your character, your place and position in the play, and you can simply react to what you’re getting from the other actors in the space.

I also think it’s especially thrilling that theatre, especially when dealing with new writing, has to be relevant. It’s difficult for it to be outdated (without an entire company severely dropping the ball) because it’s happening right there in front of you. That life that is given to characters in the theatre is something the audience pick up on, and something that makes theatre very special for everyone.

Q: Finally, What do you like to do to chill out? Oliver: Apart from interviews? I like normal things like reading and watching films. Two of my housemates are musicians in a fantastic band called Nubiyan Twist, so there’s always a lot of music around the house. I also live with my brother who is a puppeteer, so it’s fun to play around with things he’s made and have a go at building some. Also, all the things above are fun – that’s another of the things I love about acting. You get to delve deeply into the issues addressed in any play you might be doing at the time.

antic | face, in association with Nik Holttum Productions, presents School Play by Alex MacKeith

The headteacher’s office of a south London primary school is always busy. But today is results day and the phone won’t stop ringing. Jo, the headteacher of St. Barnabas, knows that the arrival of the school’s SATs results puts her job on the line. With the future of the school and its pupils at stake, Jo struggles to maintain order as her staff and superiors demand answers. Can she protect her students and herself?

antic | face is proud to present this sharp, wry and timely drama. Set against the backdrop of an education system in turmoil, Alex MacKeith’s debut play asks what it means to be a primary school teacher in contemporary Britain.

1 – 25 FEBRUARY 2017 Start Time 8pm Matinee Starts 3.30pm Running Time 90 mins approx http://ift.tt/NsSQwM

http://ift.tt/2jxghO6 LondonTheatre1.com

L.A. Excursions to Beat the Winter Blues

The dreary days of winter are upon us. While the rest of the country is experiencing single-digit temperatures and blizzards, we're entitled to complain about our share of rainy days and nights that dip below 65 degrees. With the holidays behind us, it seems like a long slog until spring brightens our collective mood. So how can you fend off a case of seasonal depression? Here are some ideas to relieve you of your winter doldrums. The Huntington - San Marino Amazingly, I've been in Los Angeles 20 years and had never made the trek to The Huntington... until recently. No matter whether you're a lifelong resident or a newcomer to this fair city, this is the ideal time to visit to view the stunning 120-acre grounds and experience the revitalized dining scene on the estate. If you haven't toured the Huntington Library, Art Collections, and Botanical Gardens at this time of year, you'll be amazed at the spectacular seasonal colors and blooms. While not as robust as the spring or summer, the grounds are still vibrant green, trees are heavy with fruit and some feature a few fall colors -- a rarity in Los Angeles. Stroll through the Desert Garden, Japanese Garden, Chinese Garden and Jungle Garden for an exotic experience that's sure to boost your mood. Huntington Gardens - Photo by Gina Hall Want to experience something otherworldly? Step inside the Orbit Pavilion (on view through February), which allows you to "hear"19 earth-orbiting satellites -- even the International Space Station -- courtesy of NASA's Jet Propulsion Laboratory. The large, sea conch shell-shaped sculpture emits sounds to identify each individual satellite that passes overhead. The result is something truly mesmerizing, expanding the world around you out into space. Once you've had your fill of nature, head into the library to examine the vast collection of rare books, manuscripts and photographs. One of the most prized possessions is a 15th century Johannes Gutenberg Bible -- one of 11 surviving vellum copies. The collection also includes a first folio edition of William Shakespeare's collected plays, published in 1623, seven years after his death -- the primary source of our knowledge concerning Shakespeare's texts. After you've had your mind blown by the grounds, you'll be delightfully surprised by the refurbished dining options on the estate, due in large part to local celebrity chefs Mary Sue Milliken and Susan Feniger. The newly revamped 1919 Cafe has been designed in the fashion of a traditional food court, but the offerings are anything but, and will satisfy even the most discerning palate. If you've been missing the Border Grill since its recent shuttering in Santa Monica, there's a pint-size version of it in the 1919 Cafe featuring the duo's famed street tacos. There's also a sushi bar, a wood oven for classic Italian dishes, and a sandwich station. Not your average street taco at Cafe 1919 - Photo by Gina Hall Explore the property further and you'll discover the Rose Garden Tea Room, nestled in the grounds' iconic rose garden. Even in winter, the garden is in bloom. Reservations are required at the cozy tea room, but it's worth planning ahead simply to taste the traditional afternoon tea delights: house-made scones, finger sandwiches and herbal fair-trade teas. The beautiful walk up to the Rose Garden Tea Room - Photo by Gina Hall Looking for something in a truly unique setting? The Freshwater Dumpling and Noodle House overlooking the Chinese Gardens offers authentic dumplings and noodle dishes (obviously) from Blue Window's Susan Feniger and Kajsa Alger, and inspired by the Far East. If you're anything like me, you'll have a sudden moment of Zen, realizing that you're somewhere between Pasadena and San Marino, on the outskirts of L.A. rather than along the banks of the Yangtze. The King and I at the Pantages - Hollywood I'll admit I'm not the biggest Rogers & Hammerstein fan -- with the notable exception of The Sound of Music. So I was delightfully surprised by the King and I at the Pantages. The production has garnered four Tony Awards, including Best Musical Revival. The cast, led by Laura Michelle Kelly as Anna and Jose Llana as the king of Siam, was remarkably impressive. What set it apart the most perhaps, however, were Michael Yeargan's sets and director Bartlett Sher's staging. It was truly a sight to behold. For the uninitiated, the story is set in 1860s Siam (that's modern-day Thailand, as I'm sure you're well aware), based on a novel by Margaret Landon's fictionalized account of Anna Leonowens' journey to the court of the Siamese king. The musical has been revived several times since its 1951 Broadway debut. Familiar tunes include: I Whistle a Happy Tune, Getting to Know You, I Have Dreamed and Shall We Dance? The ending might get you a little teary-eyed, but you'll be humming a happy tune for days to come. The show is in town until Jan. 21. The Aero Theater - Santa Monica If stage musicals aren't your thing, maybe you'll enjoy some song and dance on the silver screen. Santa Monica's Aero Theater is a delightful way to experience classic films in an intimate setting surrounded by your fellow cinephiles. Classic films screening always screening at the Aero - Photo by Gina Hall Tucked away on Montana Avenue near hip eateries such as Father's Office, Forma and R+D Kitchen, the theater is committed to screening quality prints of both popular films of yesteryear and hidden gems you might have missed. January, of course, is awards season, so expect a few appearances by Oscar contenders sprinkled throughout the month's screening series.

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from DIYS http://ift.tt/2j9EZER