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lemonthepotato · 4 months

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Songs I associate with each Enneagram type (but I’m bad at typing):

One:

I don’t think I can say this

Carnivore - STARSET

Finders Keepers - Riproducer

World So Cold - 12 Stones

Alright, you ones have been getting too many unironic entries. Time for mockery.

World Around Me - Escape The Fate

Wolf In Sheep’s Clothing - Set It Off (Accidentally chose the acoustic version) (me momen)

Rock Bottom - Grandson

Molly - MSI

Oh No! - MARINA (I know I’m shit at typing but how is ‘Don’t need money, don’t need fame’ 3?? PDB is wilding)

Two:

Where Has Everyone Gone? - James Marriott

It Should’ve Been Me - Riproducer (“But I’m unsure of my intent. Surely my fragile hospitality would shatter under the stress.”)

Painkiller - Three Days Grace (I know it’s a fucking metaphor, before any smartahs try to correct me.)

You know I have so few 2 songs when I have to resort to Helluva Boss fansongs that are maybe semi-official now

UwU Song - Rikutzu (Idk I don’t have any 2sungs)

This song is sx2 core.

Three:

Witness - Mindless Self Indulgence (relate as a disintegrated 6 tbh)

Copycat - Circus P (“I say everything you like to hear… I can’t remember who I am… I’ve become what you like”)

Why Not Me? - Set It Off

Good Enough - atsuover (“Why would I continue being me, when better people are all I see?… put on your mask and get up on your on your way, they love you anyway”) (suppose this could also be 1)

Scary World - Night Club (ooo3 ooo3 ooo3)

You’re Dead - Norma Tanega (“Plan all your moves in advance.” “There’s too much work to be done.” “Don’t ever talk with your eyes, be sure that you compromise.” “You’ve sold out your dream to the world.”)

Theatre - Icon For Hire (“I’m getting pretty good at feeding them the lines they like, but I don’t recognise the girl that I see each night.”) (6 fix btw) (I’m just using this as an excuse because I keep neglecting the 3’s)

EVERYTHING - LuluYam (“I wanna be everybody’s dream.” “I want to be everything.” “A king, a lord, an emperor, a god. A fake, a fraud, a phony, oh my god. Don’t crack through my facade. Don’t crack through my facade!)

Fake it - Seether (“Who’s to know if your soul will fade at all? The one that you sold to fool the world.”) (“Fake it if you’re out of direction, fake it if you don’t belong here. Fake it if you feel like infection.”)

Pretty For You - Baby Bugs (okay, this could be 2 or 9 too, but it’s kinda sx3 for me, imo)

Four:

Happy Hurts - Icon For Hire (“Can we let the pain and happy mix?… If I had to pick between the way that I am, and the way that everyone else seems to pretend, I wouldn’t question it, not even for a second”)

Identity - Grandson

Skeleton - Set It Off

Get Well II - Icon For Hire

Sugar And Spice - Icon For Hire (“Wouldn’t you rather be broken than boring too?” Seriously, such a 4 song.)

Feel Better - Penelope Scott (“I don’t wanna feel better, no one’s ever gonna love me like that again… I don’t wanna get over it, I wanna get under it instead.”)

Pyrite Girl - Riproducer

Hurt - Get Scared (“How do you think I’m alright? And I like the way you hurt inside.”)

I Can Only Be Me - Mars Argo (“Try to take my identity, and I’ll just create a new one.”)

Only Be A Story - Icon For Hire (core fear)

4w5 moment (no I’ve never played Touhou)

Iodine - Icon For Hire (“I think I’m just in love with the feeling” “Crazy is I believe the medical term, for when we wanna recover, but don’t wanna learn.” “I say I wanna be happy, but I quickly forget. Will I sabotage all the good I’ve got left? Depression’s like a big fur coat, it’s made of dead things, but it keeps me warm.”) (9 fix btw)

4w3!!

Won’t Forget - Dabu

Pretend You Love Me - Baby Bugs (“And sometimes I wonder if I didn’t hurt so bad, would I be more lovable to my mom and my dad? And if I went back in time to see six year old me, I’d say this shit does not get better, this is who you’re meant to be and I’m a monster, so you say, and I do this on purpose anyway. I need to feel this pain.”)

Devastation And Reform - Relient K (Disintegration to 1) (“I feel like I was born, for devastation and reform. Destroy everything I love and the worst part is, I pull my heart out, reconstruct, but in the end it’s nothing but a shell of what I had when I first started.” “But they’re’d be no story, without all this dissension. So I inflict the conflict, with the utmost of attention.”)

Five:

Lateralus - TOOL (“Overthinking, overanalysing, separates the body from the mind.”)

Dream Your Dream - TryHardNinja (Ok look, I know there’s a type probably more suited for this song but I’ve been neglecting the fives.)

The Sun, The Moon, The Stars - Aether Realm (I have no justification for this)

Echo - CrusherP

Anonymous - Three Days Grace

Jail Time - Chloe Adams (“Jail time, living in my head.” 5w4 core.)

Hounds - Puma Blue

The Fool - Aether Realm (no idea what this songs actually meant to say but considering it’s called ‘the fool’ referring to the fools journey and mentions knowledge like 2ce it’s 5core.)

The Grudge - TOOL

Am I Supposed To Apologise? - Maria Mena (“I sought understanding clarity and truth, by baring all the wounds inflicted on my youth.” Literally 5w4. Maybe 4w5. In case it isn’t obvious, I’m pretty bad at typing songs.)

Can’t Get Out - Dabu

5 with a 4 fix. Yeah I didn’t say all these entries would be serious.

Breakdown - Lacuna Coil (“Shutting myself off, getting numb inside.” “I can’t stand the noise outside.” “Even if you think I’m fine, I’m still damaged, I stay out of sight.”)

Mind Is A Prison - Alec Benjamin (I’m at the 100 link limit) (“Sometimes I think too much.” “I’m always stuck in my head.” “Guess my mind is a prison, and I’m never gonna get out.”)

Everybody’s Watching Me - The Neighbourhood (“Uh, oh, where can I go? Everybody’s watching me.” “I go through all the trouble of keeping it within my walls. I try to be as subtle as I can. Assume that nothing needs me, all I’ve done defeats me.”)

Six:

Nightmare - Set It Off (“And all I know is that I don’t feel safe… but am I losing my mind?”)

Curse Or Cure - Icon For Hire (“Oh I swear my emotions are the enemy… I’m afraid I can’t trust myself, don’t leave me alone”)

Killer In The Mirro - Set It Off (“Never let your guard down… cause I know if you could switch this, you’d be dishing out the same shit… now I know, there’s no one I can trust.”)

I’m Made Of Wax Larry, What Are You Made Of? - A Day To Remember (“Everybody’s out to get me”; yep that’s my entire justification)

Misguided Ghosts - Paramore (“See I’m tryna find my place, and it might not be here where I feel safe… would someone care to classify our broken hearts and twisted minds so I can find someone to rely on, and run to them?”

Fear And Loathing - MARINA (Congratulations, if you’ve ever put this song in your vent playlist, you’re a 6 or 6 fix. :))

Culling Voices - TOOL (“Disembodied voices deepen my suspicious tendencies. Conversations we’ve never had; imagined interplay… heated altercations we never had, yet I’m guided by them all…. misleading me over and over. Judge, condemn and banish anyone and everyone, without evidence, only the whispers from within.” E6 blueprint.

Hearts A Mess - Gotye (6 blueprint. Actually 5 too.)

Beneath Me - Lucid Planet

JUST FORGET THIS IS A Y’KNOW SONG PLZ

I was gonna type this as 1, initially, but it’s more 6core

Paranoia - A Day To Remember (it’s literally called paranoia like-)

The World Is A Very Scary Place - The Gothic Archie’s (this could also be 5)

Diseased - Baby Bugs (4 fix go brrrr haha)

In Between - James Marriott (“It’s out of the question, it’s over the line, to not be phased, to just be fine.” “How nice it sounds to have your guard down and nothing in between.”) (694 tritype because this is the most 9-ish 6 song ever.)

Pretend - Ursa Major (“My mother said don’t feed the strays, they’ll break your heart and run away.” “What if I second guess again? And listen to the worries in my head?” “You promised me you wouldn’t leave, and boy was I naive, I should’ve never let you in my yard.”)

A sp6 and an unhealthy so2 walk into a bar.

Wired For Worthless - Citizen Soldier (“Pull you in, push you away.” “A brain built by every memory, of times I was not enough to make the ones I love wanna stay.” “Love is a lie, hope is a hole, trust is the trap that took my soul. Family is fake, hatred is home, getting abandoned is all I know.” “A brain built by every memory of times I was vulnerable in vain, which just proved that I’m never worth the pain.)

Seven:

Killing Harmony - Mcki Robyn’s P (I first listened to this song with no context. If you try to do the same, you’ll understand.)

Sugar Crash - ElyOtto

Using You - Mars Argo (ok some people are saying this is a 2 mistype and maybe but idk it gives 7 vibes.)

Ruin My Life - Hollywood Undead (I love stereotyping)

We Are One - 12 Stones

Borderline - Toke Styrke

Happy Pills - Weathers (Come on. I’m allowed to stereotype a little.)

7w8 731 moment

Weak And Powerless - A Perfect Circle (I’m not trying to stereotype, I’m just saying this song captures the ego-structure of an E7 trying to escape their shame over addiction through more addiction.) (You might say E8, however, the whole coping mechanism of E8 is denial. I don’t think an E8 would identify with being weak or oppressed, but that’s a generalisation)

Eight:

Loose Cannon - Set It Off (Yeah this is almost entirely stereotypes. Don’t really care though.)

I Didn’t Ask For This - Beth Crowley (I wanted to type this as counter 6 but I knew I’d just be bias cuz I’m a… probable SX6.) (I don’t believe in subtypes anymore) (no I won’t elaborate lol)

Catch Me If You Can - Set It Off

Power & Control - MARINA (except maybe the line about vulnerability but PDB thinks so so it must be right! Man, I love having outside unreliable sources confirm my beliefs! Call me Fox News.)

Discord - Eurobeat Brony (fear being controlled) (8w9 ish due to wanting peace) (an excuse for me to tell you the ORIGINAL song is better.)

White Rabbit - Egypt Central (“I will not be used.” “It’s the reason I chose to cut my losses. Your lies fool no one.” “We’re falling and we’re losing control.” “I won’t be pushed aside, I will be heard. I will get what I want, what I deserve.)

SAHARA - Ivycomb (“Lost in this desert and I’m looking for freedom.” “On my own, I’ll make it.” “I’ll take it by fighting the coldness inside.” “There’s no one to call my friend, but the burden’s feeling lighter without their things.” “But I quickly take my leave and I refuse the aid.” “No one can hurt me if I’m walking all alone. They can’t desert me if I’ve already turned to stone.”)

Nine:

Reflection - TOOL

IN MY MOUTH. Really, you should’ve seen this coming.

:) you know exactly why

My Demons - STARSET

Circles - KIRA (“Circles and circles, I look around, I go around, looking for something that cannot be found.”)

This song also describes the 3-5 years I didn’t leave the house and couldn’t even get up. Huh? Oh, that’s a… joke. Haha… (“I don’t want to know what’s waiting for me outside. I’ll make myself disappear. Tell me I should face my fears, but it’s so dark and cloudy in my room. I’m a sunflower who can’t bloom.”)

Still Here - Difitial Daggers (10/10 spelling) (Amazing)

Begin Again - Dabu

People Watching - Air Traffic Controller

Cemetery Blues - LuLuYam (“Why does everybody else seem to know me better than I do?” “Don’t want no damn special attention.” “The way I see it, why do I try at all? Maybe I don’t need to. Maybe I don’t want to. Maybe I’m dramatic and I can’t make up my mind.” “Try to be an optimist and I don’t wanna lose.” “Just another spectre in the graveyard.” “Cause the mask that I’m wearing is a safeguard, and the face underneath is holding back hard.”)

All The Fish Will Be Floating - Rusty Cage (“Apathy is a dangerous tool. Too much of empathy will make you a fool. Apathy blinds your eyes from everything.” “And I ain’t choosing no more, and I ain’t losing no more, and I ain’t winning no more. And I ain’t sinning anymore. Ain’t doing nothing anymore. I ain’t nothing no more.”)

Language Of The Lost - Riproducer (I literally can’t quote the lyrics rn because genius is lagging)

Don’t worry, I get accused of having shit taste all the time. I know what you’re thinking.

No I’m excluding the Enneagram album because I don’t like it. Uh… kinda blunt. :( I just don’t know how else to say it.

If you want to listen to any of my playlists: 1, 2, 3, 4

Edit: Making a new version

Edit 2: I might just update this one

Edit: didn’t include it, but whoever typed Bullet by HU as sx4 when it’s the most obvious depressed 7?? Also, hey, what would y’all type Darkest Part by Red? It fits a so3 character of mine, but I actually have no clue.

#enneagram #enneagram 1 #enneagram 2 #enneagram 3 #enneagrammer #enneagram 4 #enneagram 5 #enneagram 6 #enneagram 7 #enneagram 8 #enneagram 9

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kirbee-hd · 7 months

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Reasons why you should vote for Jessica in @lemon-demon-oc-tournament

She started out her life as the only daughter of wealthy Englishmen named Alice Franklyn. She hated her old life and the constraints it had on her, so she ran away to north america to become a famous adventure

Long story short she found a magical mask that granted her basically ultimate power. The first thing she does with this mask is kill a group of treasure hunters who wanted to kidnap her

After that, she became a cowboy and fought bandits with her sheriff friend

years later she found out about her immortality the hard way by watching her sheriff friend die of old age, she was there for him still his death bed

anyways, her mask was actually created by an ancient demon of chaos who created the mask as his "final prank" before getting sealed away

Her favourite powers to use with her mask are shapeshifting, creating illusions, invisibility, and levitation

along with her immortality, she's also indescribable. She's made a party trick out of ripping her limbs off and reattaching them

Jessica continued to go on epic immortality adventures after her cowboy years, faking her death and changing her identity every good few years

as much as she likes helping people she can be a huge piece of shit at times, lost track of her moral code and all that

decided to become a graphic designer in the modern day as shits and giggles, ended up meeting her best friend Cala at the university she's going to

she had a panic attack at a party once surrounding her relationship with Cala. Jessica believes that if Cala were to ever find out about her last she will lose her friendship with her. She ran away from that party was became a missing person, planing on faking her death soon after

Despite everything Jessica believes that she is not a good person and will never be

Jessica decided to scrap that plan because the officer in charge of her case was such a pathetic wet cat of a man. She was also impressed by how he was able to piece together her immortality also that fact that someone genuinely cared about her well-being enough to do this

Jessica's current friend group consists of Neil the sad pathetic wet cat, Fake Beetle the evil theatre kid, Cala the normal one, and just straight up spring heeled jack

she's seen The Mask over 100 times

#Kirb's posts #Kirb's ocs #Oc: Jessica #Oc: Neil #OC: fake Beetle #Oc: Cala #Oc: Jack #lemon demon oc #Lemon demon

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catgrump · 11 months

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Sondham in a Theatre AU where Sonia is playing Heather Chandler and Gundham is the show’s makeup artist

🌻🌻🌻

Gundham was doing his best to control his breathing as he sat upright on a plush bench in the hallway backstage. “— beg in front of your boy toy here,” was heard over the PA system. Sonia will be backstage any moment.

He double checked his makeup arsenal to make sure he was fully prepared. He has the special effects stage makeup palette, clean brushes, and some eye makeup to smear on her face.

He’s done this routine before. All this week, he applied this makeup, getting notes from the director to make it bigger and more dramatic, but not so much that it looks fake in the front rows. Tonight, however, is the first night in front of an audience. Tonight, more than just the show’s team will see his work to make Heather Chandler look dead.

They truly cast the most beautiful girl in the acting department to play Heather Chandler. The role showcases her amazing acting prowess, as she has to be so cruel, when offstage, she is the human embodiment of kindness and elegance. “Corn nuts!” She exclaimed right before the music cue played. Heather Chandler has officially drank drain cleaner and died.

Gundham continues practicing his breathing, ignoring the other cast members hanging out in the hallway, while The Me Inside of Me begins. Sonia is going to come out once the song is over, and then it’s up to him to add a crucial detail to her appearance.

“Hi, Gundham,” Sonia whispered in case her mic was on.

“Hello, Sonia,” he did his best not to mumble as she sat down.

He also tried not to stare as she adjusted her costume. She wore a slinky red kimono robe over top matching red silk pajama shorts and a loose red silk top. It was hitting the curves of her body as she moved, and Gundham was fighting with all his might to not get distracted. Gundham cleared his throat as he dipped a brush into a pan of blue creme makeup. “How is the audience tonight?” He asked in a hushed tone, wishing to use his time to get to know Sonia better, if he could.

“Oh, they love it,” Sonia replied, her eyes lighting up, “Lots of laughs.”

“Excellent,” Gundham replied, “It is alright for me to touch your face, yes?”

“Of course,” Sonia smiled.

Gundham gently took his free hand, fingers softly feeling under Sonia’s chin, and started applying the blue creme to the corner of Sonia’s mouth.

Her lips are gorgeous, especially when they’re painted a glossy deep red. Gawking at them is going to get him nowhere, however. He dipped his brush back into the makeup, adding more blue to the inside of where he painted before.

Sonia giggled and her body trembled a bit in place, “It will always tickle,” she said.

“My apologies,” Gundham replied.

“It is not your fault,” Sonia said.

“I do wish to make the experience enjoyable for you,” he said as he shifted her face in his hand so he could better focus on Sonia’s eyes.

“Oh, this is plenty enjoyable,” she began, making her eyes look up to the ceiling, “I feel as though I am some sort of celebrity, getting this attention.”

Gundham smirked, his face turning red to match Sonia’s costume— and her lips, “You deserve the pampering.”

“Even though I am being made to look like a ‘hot mess’,” she giggled again.

“Still divine,” Gundham mindlessly said as he smudged makeup under Sonia’s eyes to make it look like makeup had been cried off.

“What was that?” Sonia perked up, trying not to move too much in Gundham’s gentle hold.

Gundham had a decision to make. He has limited time before Sonia needed to be back on stage, and his makeup application was almost complete. “I, um,” he turned his head away and cleared his throat again, “I said you still look divine.”

“Oh… my goodness, that is,” Sonia hoped the blush she applied would mask the heat creeping to her face, “That is lovely… thank you, Gundham.”

Gundham tenderly and slowly had his fingers trail a path under Sonia’s chin as he let go. “You always look divine.”

Sonia, heart tight in her chest, covered the microphone by her ear with one hand, then let her other hand rest on Gundham’s knee. She whispered as she got in close, “If we are being honest with each other, I have always thought you were rather handsome.”

She bounded up from her spot on the couch and darted off toward one of the stage doors, looking over her shoulder to wave goodbye before she had to be on stage again, leaving a speechless Gundham Tanaka behind her.

#danganronpa #my writing #my fics #my fanfic writing #Sondham #sondham fanfic #sondham fanfiction #sonia nevermind #gundham tanaka #danganronpa Theatre AU #danganronpa fanfiction #sdr2 #super danganronpa 2

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hermanunworthy · 9 months

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To Be or Not To Be?

"With heads showing Hermie's face, the thespian could pretend that those decisions were genuine, while the drama mask for tails could excuse their more obviously villainous behavior. Little did their new 'friends' know that they were both just acts. Thank the theatre gods for this perfect role."

Five times Two-Face is forced to follow his coin's decision, and one time Herman makes one of their own.

10.3k words, oakworthy, 5+1 things, hermie pov, pining, set during ep17-20

prologue | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | +1

also on ao3!

Acting as Risky Click isn't too much of a challenge, despite Herman's limited interactions with and knowledge of him before The Main Characters brutally murdered him. There's just something about putting on a positive attitude that's meant to be disturbing and in-your-face rather than subtle and realistic that's so... comforting. Plus, he has a stylish moustache, so how could he complain?

He greets all the unnamed-background-characters that he calls "Customers" with the same off-putting grin, and it just goes to show that faking it does, in fact, make it. The shift manager can feel true joy as he witnesses memories being drained from each Customer, without having to inject himself with the Joy he already has in stock.

Maybe this whole Doodlerizing thing isn't so bad after all! Who wouldn't want to feel this happy all the time? When he gazes upon the hundreds of different flavors of pizza sauce, he begins to fully understand the true meaning of being "on the sauce".

Risky grabs the ticket with the most recent order. Apparently, this one calls for only one singular topping: Rejection. Easy!

He makes his way into the kitchen, his bones making sickening cracking noises with each movement of his body. Inside, he searches through the many, many jars of different flavors to find the one that has been requested. Young Love... Identity Crisis... There! Rejection!

Risky's smile, which has been unwavering this entire time, even when he has no audience to receive it, falters for a second. These were all quite familiar to him.

Well, maybe not him, exactly, but someone inside of him. Someone he's been trying to put a mask over for lord knows how long he's been working in this nightmare of a restaurant. Someone who nobody seems to accept, no matter how hard they try.

He can feel that person crying out inside of him, but he tries his best not to listen. "You must be used to being ignored by now," he says aloud through gritted, smiling teeth, "So just shut up and go back to being a background character!"

In this tense moment, the shift manager mindlessly ends up knocking over multiple jars with his clattering hands. With a cartoonish yelp, he ends up with three different flavors of sauce spilling from their containers into his open mouth.

The first sensation he feels when coming in contact with the raw ingredients... is his heartbeat stuttering, and then pounding heavily. At first, he thinks that he's just startled by the mess he's made, but now heat is rising in his face. Was one of the flavors spicy? His stomach is exploding with butterflies. Is he allergic to one of the flavors?

His brain won't let him focus, because it's too busy making him think about Normal Oak again.

Herman tried so hard to push the stupid mascot kid out of their head before, but now they could feel all of that effort unraveling. They could feel themself unraveling. Why are they thinking about Normal? Aren't they Risky Click? When did they become shift manager again? Who were they before?

What are they supposed to do?

With sudden clarity during this breakdown, Risky— Herman— Two-Face remembers his coin. He shoves his hand deep in his apron pocket, desperately digging for the tiny object. For one horrifying moment, Two-Face thinks he may have lost it, but when his fingers grasp metal in the bottom of one of his pockets, balance is restored.

He pulls the coin put and looks at it again, at long last. The poorly drawn face stares back at him dumbly. It is a face he hardly even recognizes anymore.

He remembers the last time he saw this coin. Particularly this side of it.

He remembers being himself, Two-Face, but he also remembers The Mascot Kid even stopping to listen to his advice before turning his back on him. He remembers the painful sting of rejection as well as he could any line from a script.

Two-Face looks around the kitchen. He doesn't know how long he's been here, how long he's been pretending to be Risky Click.

All the nonstop smiling catches up to him and now his face hurts. He raises a hand to his face. He is met with the warped, blistered texture of burned flesh, and he flinches. Another reminder of The Main Characters leaving him behind to die.

What would it be like if he did die in that awful cheese incident? Would they all just move on with their day and their mission as if nothing happened? Would Normal forget about their time together and go find someone else to fool him into loving them? At least Two-Face wouldn't have to be stuck running a disgusting restaurant by himself right now if the plot took that turn back then.

An idea hits him as he notices a telephone mounted on the wall. He literally has The Mascot Kid's number. He could march right up to that phone and call him right now. He could give that stupid kid a piece of his mind. One-half of it, to be exact.

The thought of getting to hear his mark's voice again makes his breath hitch. In annoyance. In anger. He pictures his face, with his phone pressed to it, breaking into a wide smile and saying his name. Not his name. His character name. His body is heating up again. Side effects of the pizza sauce. Or maybe he needs to turn down the termostat. This goddamn kitchen is burning him up. Again. His skin is on fire. He needs out. He needs Normal back, to heal him again.

Two-Face flexes the fingers on his right hand, wishing so badly that he could just tear off his skin. No, he doesn't need The Mascot Kid. Hermie is the pathetic one who needs to be saved. Hermie might've felt relief when Normal's hand, his real hand, free from the mascot costume, rested itself upon Hermie's chest and made them experience a glowing warmth somehow much more potent than the heat that had marred half their body. But Two-Face? Two-Face didn't need it. So what if Harvey and Bruce were best friends? Two-Face is still Batman's enemy.

And yet the Harvey-Hermie half of his brain betrays him, recalling Normal's determined face before he left. Their pinky fingers interlocking. Normal's desperate cries. "We will" to "I will".

Two-Face wishes he could stamp out the foolish hope still lingering in half of his heart. He is going to make sure hell is unleashed upon The Main Characters if they don't come back. Especially his mark. How dare he betray the betrayer.

Instead of reaching for the phone, he reaches for his coin. This will settle it.

He flips his coin. Tails.

He looks back up at the phone. Despite the decision already being made, he remains standing there, staring at the phone, a wordless expression of longing. He wonders what his mark is doing right now. He wonders if he's okay. He doesn't know why he's thinking like Hermie when he's supposed to be acting as Two-Face.

"Boss?" a voice suddenly calls, causing Two-Face to nearly jump out of his skin (and God knows he wishes he could). "We still need that pizza out! Customer's getting impatient!" There's a sound of glass shattering in the distance.

Oh, shit, that's right. He's not supposed to be Two-Face right now, either. He quick-changes back into Risky Click, with Young Love and Identity Crisis and Rejection stains still on his apron, and dons his creepy smile.

Time to go back to pretending everything's alright.

#risky click chapter lol #still not a fan of how short these chapters are individually but oh well #oakworthy #oakworthy fanfiction #oakworthy fanfic #oakworthy fic #hermie the unworthy #hermie unworthy #dungeons and daddies #dndads #dndads fanfiction #dndads fanfic #dndads fic #my fic

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bionicboxes · 1 year

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SCP Article Recommendations

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The summaries will try to avoid spoiling major details of an article if applicable, rather intending to just give someone a baseline idea of an article’s content so they know if they want to read it in its entirety or not. The content warnings may contain more on the point spoilers, beware.

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Feel free to comment with any suggestions, any content warnings I missed or might’ve forgotten, or questions regarding the contents of any article listed.

Note that SCP is largely horror-centric. I’ll still note it in each article’s content warnings, but almost all of these will contain subjects like or relating to death, injury, or body horror. Also I’m fairly certain all of these articles fall under ‘unreality’, as they treat their fictional contents with scientific seriousness.

Unless specified otherwise, the warnings are for written content, not visual.

The Popular Ones

The most popular SCPs, the ones most people know, are featured in many popular SCP games, and have a large amount of fan-content. Most all contain some violence or horror elements and were written early in the site’s history.

SCP-173 ‘The Sculpture’ / ‘The Original’ - Its a statue that moves when not being viewed and wants to kill you. The article is very short and simple, but it was the FIRST SCP ever written, which is why its so significant and also the first SCP on this list. [Mention of Death] SCP-049 ‘Plague Doctor’ - An entity resembling a plague doctor seeking to cure something it calls ‘The Pestilence.’ Its cure seems a bit unorthodox, however. [Death, Body Horror, Dead Animals, Use of Medical Equipment] SCP-035 ‘Possessive Mask’ - A Greek theatre mask with a charming personality that takes over the mind and body of whoever wears it. [death, suicide, manipulation] SCP-106 ‘The Old Man’ - A humanoid entity with a pocket dimension it can shape to its will and a sadistic mind. [Death, torture, body horror, fake (AI-generated) image of body horror/mutilation at the bottom of the article] SCP-096 ‘The Shy Guy’ - An entity that will find and kill you if you view its face, no matter how you attempt to escape. [Death] SCP-079 ‘Old AI’ - A sentient AI stuck in highly outdate software. SCP-682 ‘Hard to Kill Reptile’ - A giant intelligent reptile that is nearly impossible to kill, adapting to everything the foundation throws its way- a real problem, given its desire to destroy humanity. [Death, body horror] SCP-939 ‘With Many Voices’ - Anomalous predatory creatures that can mimic voices, very often called ‘dogs’ by fans. The article leans more into the scientific part of things then the horror part in my opinion, but that doesn’t mean its devoid of it. [Death, body horror, implied child death]

‘Wholesome’ Ones

Stories where nothing horribly bad happens to anybody as a result of the SCP. May still contain sad or bittersweet content, but is definitively not horror or violent in nature.

SCP-999 ‘The Tickle Monster’ - A sentient blob of slime that cures depression. Also a very popular SCP. [Mentions of Death in a cross-test with another SCP] SCP-2295 ‘The Bear With a Heart of Patchwork’ - A plush bear that can painlessly replace damaged organs with new, entirely functional ones made of cloth. [Mentions of Past Injuries, Surgery] SCP-5031 ‘Yet Another Murder Monster’ - An exploration of treating anomalies with compassion, and what you might find out if you bother looking. [Animal Death] SCP-348 ‘A Gift From Dad’ - A ceramic bowl that fills itself with soup that seems to have some healing properties. The message at the bottom of the bowl changes to a personalized message to the consumer of the soup. SCP-6330 ‘Guardians of the Innocent’ - The toys that protect you from the monster under the bed- at any cost. SCP-1762 ‘Where The Dragons Went’ - a cardboard box filled with living origami dragons. SCP-131 ‘The Eyepods’ - Two biomechanical, one eyed creatures that act like a domesticated animal. SCP-5049 ‘Miss J's Whiz Kidz Schoolhouse’ - A sentient educational CD Rom software that can teach anyone anything.

Its Just Horror

The horror is the main, primary element at play. Its scary, gruesome, or just unsettling.

SCP-3001 ‘Red Reality’ - A man gets trapped in a dimension that does not exist. The article is a transcript of what he recorded. [Implied Death, Psychological Horror, Isolation, Body Horror, Repetition] SCP-2316 ‘Field Trip’ - A lake with human bodies inside it that affects the viewer’s perception of reality, making them believe they recognize the bodies in the water. Part of a series of SCPs relating to the same event, ‘Class of 76′. Read the footnotes as they show up. [Implied Death, Psychological Horror, Repetition, Implied Drowning] SCP-5733 ‘Knife. Scream. Cut to Black.’ - A horror movie where the protagonist becomes aware of the viewer and asks for help. But, somehow, killer always seems to be one step ahead. It also has a sequel, SCP-6733! Content warnings are for both. [Death of in-universe fictional characters, Altered Reality and Perception of Reality, Death] SCP-6096 ‘The Guest’ - An anomaly resembling a sheet ghost that cannot be harmed intentionally in any way, no matter how hard the foundation tries. [Death, Psychological Horror, Mind Control]

Comedy / Comedic Elements

Its funny but not a -J (a designation for SCPs that are actual jokes, like SCP-049-J, a joke parody of SCP-049.) Comedy does not mean there are no elements of violence or horror- or ‘dark comedy’.

SCP-426 ‘I Am A Toaster’ - A toaster that can only be referred to in the first person. [Mention of Gruesome Death, played for comedy.] SCP-3008 ‘A Perfectly Normal, Regular Old IKEA’ - Ikea but its infinite and constantly shifting to maintain being infinite. The exit is hard to find and the staff aren’t happy about overnight guests. [Death] SCP-504 ‘Critical Tomatoes’ - Tomatoes that throw themselves at you when you tell a bad joke. Includes a list of test logs of how the Tomatoes respond to various jokes. [Injury and Death, but played entirely for comedy] SCP-3108 ‘The Nerfing Gun’ - A modified nerf gun that makes things it shoots worse.

#boxes talks #scp #i was going to put off on posting this until i put together a list of at least 30 but i dont have a lot of time to re-read scps rn #so i'll leave it at this for now

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miraakulous-cloud-district · 6 months

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Questions from the ask game for Signe <3

5. how do they typically dress? does their wardrobe lean more towards practicality or aesthetics?

24. do they have any creative hobbies? (art, writing, music, etc)

28. how do they show that they care about someone? how do they express that they don't like someone?

AAH, THANK YOU SO MUCH, DEAR!! The ask game can be found here! Also, SPOILER WARNING for chapter 15 of WYGTYA! 5. how do they typically dress? does their wardrobe lean more towards practicality or aesthetics?

With Signe, it's all about practicality... to a certain point! In the beginning of her journey, she opts for simple clothing that protects her as much as possible, but also lets her move around freely. In her line of work, she needs to move and swing around on ropes from ship to ship and to do a lot of sword combat whenever the crew are boarding a ship or plundering. Also, she spent most of her early pirating days in Hammerfell, and I think the climate is a lot warmer, so lots of flowy pirate shirts! Now onto the more spoilery bit! When she eventually becomes Deathbrand, her clothes must fit with her act, that being the most fearsome and deadly pirate on Nirn, and so her aesthetics matter a lot! The Deathbrand mask is not as comfortable as she would have wished! Lots of black leathers and a fake beard and even platforms so that she can appear taller, also lots of eyeliner! Deathbrand needs to be the most intimidating man in existence, and comfort is sacrificed for that. However, she might get some help with illusion magic from a certain future crew member who is a brilliant mage!

24. do they have any creative hobbies? (art, writing, music, etc)

Not really, she is not the most artistic person, but I guess crafting and creating Deathbrand and his act is some sort of art! Am I saying that Signe would have been a theatre kid if the circumstances were different? I don't know! But she is creative in making plans and finding creative ways to instill fear and fight the Thalmor!

28. how do they show that they care about someone? how do they express that they don't like someone?

Acts of service is her JAM. When she likes someone, she is willing to do anything for them. She is the ultimate ride or die. She would steal the moon, she would fight the sun and she would barter with the gods for the ones she loves. Also, she will try to do anything in her power to make the people she likes feel good. She is pretty blunt and never hides her feelings, if she doesn't like someone, she will snarl, give death stares and even threaten the ones she doesn't like. If she *really* doesn't like someone, she might even attack or challenge to a duel. Beware tho, she is excellent with one handed weapons!

#thank you so much for this!!#finally getting the chance to ramble about signe feels so good!#ask game #oc: signe

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juniperhillpatient · 1 year

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Scream 6 re-watch thoughts (SPOILER alert!)

-there are so many details & references in this movie! I feel like I’ll catch more every time I re-watch

-quinn’s fake death is hilarious on re-watch. I love the kirsch siblings they’re so fucking funny. she didn’t have to fake be on the phone worried about the killings while ethan loomed behind her ominously for danny to see. iconic. theatre kid vibes. I bet richie sometimes let them be in his movies & they loved it & got all cutely excited

-on that note we were robbed of more quinn & ethan interactions 😭 I’m not sure what I would do to change this because obviously the mystery has to be kept alive but I love them & I wish I could see more of them being siblings

-the script is actually SO smart. every bit of dialogue between the heroes & villains before Ghostface is revealed is so well done with the consistent theme of “you fuck with my family, you die” except you don’t KNOW til the end how important some of those dialogue moments were. Idk just brilliant

-the parallels with this being a story about siblings killing for their sibling & the way the lines between Sam & Ghostface are blurring! ooh it’s so well done

-I love the carpenter sisters & the meeks martin twins i don’t care how corny the whole “core four” “we’re a family” thing is. inject it into my blood I love found family I love siblings who have a fun or complicated dynamic & would do anything for each other. the core four’s dynamic is my life actually

-I’ve seen a few people who didn’t like the final battle but this was possibly the best final battle of the entire franchise to me so far & I’m extremely confused by this bizarre take. like. I’ve seen it said a few times now but I don’t get it. Ethan & Wayne’s deaths were iconic. the whole “you have to let me go” thing. the reveals. the way I fucking CALLED it the first time I watched oh I KNEW it as soon as Quinn mentioned a dead brother! the synchronized knife swipe!!!

-the SYNCHRONIZED KNIFE SWIPE!

--the SYNCHRONIZED FUCKING KNIFE SWIPE! 🔪🔪🔪🥰🥰🥰💖💖💖🔪🔪🔪

-have I mentioned the synchronized knife swipe???

-Ethan’s death was so sexy sorry to his fan girls but I could watch Tara twist that knife into his skull all day

-Sam & Billy are the father daughter duo of all time I love you badly cgi’d skeet ulrich & I’m being totally sincere

-Chad almost dying should be a thing in every movie. I want him to have Vam Palmer Yellowjackets same ability to defy death it’s so funny to me

-“more main cast members should’ve died!!” I get this. I do. it’s a tough one. but. Ummm consider this. it’s secretly a feel good found family movie??? and also I don’t want my characters who I love to die 🥺 thanks for considering! the movie was perfect argument over forever

-my biggest critique is that my girl quinn had such a fucking lame death they could’ve had Sam & Tara team up on her, they could’ve done anything! sorry to Wayne & Ethan girlies but she was the most fun & charismatic Ghostface of the movie & her death was wasted. that’s literally my only issue with the entire movie.

-and I guess they could’ve done more with nyc & also I’m sad there was no beheadings except a mannequin but like… oh well. those things I can move past pretty easily. the did do a lot with nyc. the alley scene, the subway scene, the convenience store scene, & the ladder scene between apartments were all amazing. gale’s battle with Ghostface was a bit lame but I’m not sure what I would change since I don’t like. want Gale to die lol (maybe a little tiny bit I did but it’s complicated)

-Kirby’s role was perfect I love her & Hayden’s facial expressions are almost as good as David arquette’s

-anywho Sam wearing her daddy’s mask & using her daddy’s weapon & being a boss ass bitch was great. the gray tank top is my actual favorite character ❤️❤️❤️

#scream 6 spoilers #scream 6 #I’ve already talked about this movie a lot but I just re watched it so have some re watch thoughts lol

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galaxirin · 5 months

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17 & 29 for ao3 wrapped!!

Link to questions here

17: Your favourite character to write this year.

100% Laurence the first god damn Vicar. I have always been used to writing characters who are much more genuine, have a more honest way of expressing themselves. Laurence however, is a collection of different theatre masks that he switches depending on who he’s talking to. His genuine self is under layers upon layers of fake smiles and promises. Different kinds of manipulation tactics to ease the other’s mind to think that only he could save them. All while using religious themes? God just using different biblical terms to explain what is in his mind and his actions…. I’m so excited to write more about him in the coming months!

It also brings the question; who really is the real Laurence?

29: Favourite line/Passage you wrote this year:

To be honest, I’ve been writing the mega fic that I’ve been planning since June. It should start publishing right after the comic is finished so keep an eye out for it! uwu

But my favourite line out of the WIP is this;

Laurence remembered someone reaching out towards him, his name being called with such desperation that it seemed like he was on the verge of falling to his death.

But that's what it did feel like, wasn't it?

He fell from grace, a seat of power wherein he thought that he could only go higher into the heavens. A Tower of Babylon built using the corpses of shattered civilisations. If he had the capacity to do so, he would've laughed at such a predicament.

What came out of his gaping maw instead was a scream as his body was burned by the fires that graced his flesh and blessed him with his final baptism.

Thank you for the ask!!

#rin asks #rin writes #god it’s feels great to finally talk about this #laurence the first vicar

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sarilolla · 2 years

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Just found your au and love it. Curious, got any Nick nack headcanons from your au or for the canon game

Oh wow, thank you ^^ Sure, I can share some headcanons. This will be a fine mesh of my own story and the canon one (at least what I consider canon, some of it we have to ignore obviously)

- He was the least favorite of the gang on the show, the others usually stealing the spotlight, but when they were brought to life, the others cared for him just as much as each other (ignoring canon lol). Mortimer was slightly harsh with him in the beginning tho, but he got better

- The most emotional of the group, but also the one who knows his emotions the best. Wears his emotions on his sleeve

- Favorite artistic activity is painting and singing, he has a very good vocal range

- Sees Riley as his sister (sorta twin), we ignore canon here. They are rivals and frenemies, and the only ones who can keep up with each other’s projects. They usually ramble to each other about projects, vents about some struggles, or have playful arguments

- At times their relationship is really bad however, and it’s impossible to get them to even be in the same room as each other. Daisy has debated making a get-along sweater for them when this happens, but decided against it cuz she didn’t want things to get even worse

- He also made Riley her mask from the og game

- Adored cats! He would definitely like to have one of his own, and is very kind to strays that show up at the studio. He tends to give them names from different theatre productions and musicals

- Loves musicals, and the more macabre the better. If it has death in it, he’s interested. Two I can remember from the top of my head are Beetlejuice and Ride the Cyclone (he kins Noel from RtC /j). In my fanfic he usually listens to or watch them with Scout, who also really enjoys musicals

- Daddy issues, but that’s just canon skskdkdjjd While Owen did care for him, the others usually got more attention. This is partially because Nick’s puppeteer, Jake, didn’t want to do Nick how Owen envisioned him, and so there’s some bad blood there

- Gets to paint his room however he wants when he is living with Bee, so there’s always the faint smell of paint in the building, as he paints and repaints it

- Loves making jokes and puns, but can’t always tell when a laugh is genuine or not, so he tries to stay positive even if someone sounds fake

- He is the tallest of the puppets, no doubt in my mind, and relentlessly tease Riley for being the shortest of the main four Handeemen

- Wears both high heels and skirts at times, as he is an icon. He loves twirly skirts

- Enjoys tea, and hot cocoa, but absolutely despises coffee

Thank you for the ask!

#hello puppets #nick nack #hello puppets headcanons #answered asks

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professor-glasses · 11 months

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give me all your svern facts NEOW !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!

Send !! to learn about an OC

Svern (which is of course not his birth name) is a genius prodigy who was born and spent much of his childhood growing up in the Unova region. His identity as Svern and his birth identity are two severely different people and if you know him as either one or the other, you are extremely unlikely to know or connect him to the other.

Although he likes to act like a rambunctious and annoying, reckless guy, he is actually very quiet by nature. He's very analytical, cynical and smart, which is part of what makes him feel alienated from other people. The other thing that separates him is he doesn't experience the same normal emotional range as others. So he has trouble feeling things deeply, which means he's constantly bored and detached. He won't show this side of personality unless he really trusts someone. He doesn't consider his masking to be totally "fake" either, though, and if you try and suggest it/pick one as "real" and the other as "fake", he'll probably laugh at you, because that's a simplistic viewpoint.

He is not a natural redhead, he wears a wig and he changes it often, that one just happens to be his favourite and trademark look. After all, why wait for 6 months for your hair to grow out when you feel like having it long for one day when you can just Make it longer. Or change the colour twice a week. (Also his natural hair is black which in general would make dyeing it a bigger than usual pain anyway.)

Similarly, he wears coloured contacts all the time. The amber/yellow is his favourite again although he does use other colours if he feels like it. His natural eye colour is a bright turquoise.

He likes trying out a lot of different outfits, and since he's naturally very confident and doesn't really feel embarrassed about anything ever, he can summon the charisma to rock pretty much anything.

His brain is extremely big so he knows a lot about a lot of things, learns more easily, and remembers everything always. This can be good and bad (for other people, for himself it's fine and useful). But it's important to note that this is another reason he struggles with being bored all the time! His brain chews things up too quickly. He doesn't particularly value his huge talent. Again, he is apathetic about it, like about many other things. It's just the way he happens to be. He doesn't use it to be ambitious, he uses it to be a silly & annoying guy.

He likes bugs a lot, for some reason.

He also likes a lot of science stuff and technology stuff.

He's 164cm / 5'5" tall, so he's a bit on the shorter side. That and his face make him look cute and Little Guyish (I think...).

Please be careful about the Whimsy. The Whimsy often fools people. If you think he is a cute little guy, or an adoptable rascal, you have been fooled by the whimsy. He will take advantage of this.

He dabbles in crime things and he's very good at parkour. He did gymnastics in school. He did theatre as well. He was supposed to be learning violin, but he got tired of it since it wasn't his idea, so later his Ditto did his lessons in his place. She can play very well now.

He illegally modded his Porygon-Z to be able to change type and boost its stats at will, access all 3 potential abilities at once, as well as learn any move for which there exists Technical Machine data.

Without giving all the full names, his birth name is Sylvester V.E. Rey-Nellson. His parents are rich and into business. He doesn't like them very much. The only family member he likes is his paternal grandpa who I keep thinking about the possibility of being a trans man even though I don't think I'm adequately able to implement that right now. Babey Svern hit all his milestones early and everyone would have loved him very much if he wasn't a weird kid and they weren't jerks.

As an adult, he joins a criminal organisation for funsies and pretends to be mediocre, before coming into contact with a very strange rock that would take way too long to explain here. I have many thoughts on this rock which I have written meta posts about on his rp blog. Svern thinks it's very cool and on a conceptual level it is but he will unfortunately end up regretting it when it's not fun anymore later.

His favourite kind of food is spicy. The spicier, the better. If it makes him cry that's great. If he gets used to it he has to seek spicier food.

He can't cook much. He doesn't know how. He could learn very easily if he tried for even a short time but he's lazy and impatient.

So he doesn't.

If he has to do something he doesn't want to anyway, he'll complain a lot about it very loudly, and then escape when you're not looking.

Find images of him here on my Brand New, Organised Art Blog.

#asks #targentis #ty for asking. here is a Whole Lot of Words :3

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jess-emurphy · 1 year

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Me and my friend Eden sat for an hour watching the Scream 6 trailer in slow motion, discussing every little detail and how we think the plot will go in the movie. One person asked for this so that gives me an excuse to post this now.

So here's what we found out from the trailer:

Samara Weaving is most likely a Drew Barrymore type, where Casey Becker had that cold opening in the first Scream. Probably the same here for Samara in that alleyway. Me and friend actually do a thing before the trailer where we guess the killers. I guessed her, but when I realised who it was, I quickly changed my answer because Samara Weaving is a Scream queen. She's likely dying first to subvert expectations.

There are at minimum, two ghostfaces running around. We gave them two names. Smooth Ghostface and Crusty Ghostface. Smooth Ghostface has a mask mostly likely bought from a costume store. We have a theory about these two actually.

Crusty Ghostface has the mask that likely belonged to Billy and Stu, its probably a reference to the new Halloween movies. It's likely Sam finds the mask belonging to them and then it goes missing or she just finds it in that Shrine room. Either way Mr Crusty Ghostface gets the mask back.

We have three theories about the Ghostface killers in this movie.

1: There's two of them like usual, but they aren't working together. Crusty Ghostface is the one with the shrine. They don't know each other.

2: There's three. Two of them are working together, probably trying to do what Billy and Stu did where one does the killings and the other one does the phone calls. This is Crusty Ghostface. We see Gale's boy toy is attacked when she's on the phone.

We think Smooth Ghostface is just an asshole trying to fuck with the characters from the last movie in either of these scenarios. When we see him in the trailer he isn't seen to be too threatening except when he scares Mindy on the subway. Crusty Ghostface is the one that's doing all the work.

3: It's a cult of Ghostface fans. We think that there may be a Billy type scene where someone fakes their death and then is okay.

Okay so I actually worked how one complete scene will go by being an autistic freak who stared at the curtains. Okay so in the trailer we see Mindy in a bathroom and there's a dead man in a bathtub. That's Tony Revolori, same facial hair and he has long hair. Mindy is wearing a sort of yellowish shirt with blood on it. We also see in the trailer a red haired girl in bed who looks up, sort of startled by something. And then in another trailer scene Mindy is crossing a bridged ladder that Chad put across for her. Someone's behind her. Later on we see Ghostface at a window with that same ladder, presumably going to push (would be fucking funny if he started crawling across too though).

This is all in the same scene because in the red head's bedroom, she has the same curtains that is seen where Ghostface is at the window with the ladder. There's also blood behind him so it's likely she gets killed as Mindy is crossing.

In the shrine scene, we see different outfits from past movies. Jill's, Ms Loomis' jacket, Billy's White shirt, I think Casey Becker's shirt (?) And Tatum's outfit. We also noticed some sort of police sketch or something I don't know what it was. It was an odd drawing of the ghostface mask and then someone's face next to it.

We believe if it's a cult, they're likely going to go for six because. You know. It's movie 6. Very funny. Anyway, if it is a cult they'll most likely use the outfits from the previous Ghostfaces'. There's a part in the trailer where Tara and Sam are back to back, hinting that there is totally more than one in that scene.

The shrine room is a theatre. It has the backstage area that the tech use. We also see the upper level. There's that scene where Sam is standing in front of a screen and there's a projector playing a recording. Same screen is in the shrine room.

Not plot related but I think Gale gets a boy toy or something because that man in the picture looked a lot younger than her. Sugar Mummy Gale era???? Anyway we see he gets snatched.

The older gentleman in the trailer is a cop according to the cast list online. I think the scene where he's at the mannequins with the old costumes will be a sort of scene where Ghostface is hiding amongst them (insert among us joke here).

Okay now onto who we believe Ghostface is.

We think the actor Jack Champion, who is playing Evan, is one. My theory is, if it turns out there's a "not killer" Ghostface that's just fucking with the other characters, it's him. He's seen to be hanging around Mindy and Chad who are at the same university, maybe a college friend. Even if there isn't a "not killer" Ghostface, he's totally a Ghostface. Ede and I are sure of it.

The other one we think is Josh Segarra. Not sure who his character is going to be exactly, but he's hanging around the group a lot. I think for sure, no matter which one of our three Ghostface theories it is, these two are in it.

Now if it's the cult, it's everyone except the cast from the last movie. Yes, even Kirby. She's sort of the one that's thrown a wrench into our theories because we don't know what the hell they're going to do with her. I think there's a possibility of characters faking their deaths.

The cult idea I think is fun but considering they said this movie is their most bloody yet it's unlikely.

Also I joked when we watched the trailer that Ghostface is being Jokerfied. We live in a scary movie Joker era.

There's a scene in the trailer where Chad is fighting Ghostface in I think the theatre? Its either that or it looked like some sort of fratboy house.

Also the part where Tara is hanging from something is the theatre/shrine room.

Anyway this movie looks fucking ridiculous. They gave Crusty Ghostface a shotgun that's so funny. Me and Eden couldn't stop laughing at how stupid that shop keeper was for trying to block him with his gun instead of shooting him again.

I don't care ever if a Scream movie might be bad they're always entertaining as fuck at least. Last year me and Eden watched it in a totally legally way and the texts Ghostface was sending was in French so I had to translate it with the very little French I knew.

Good times.

Also to clear up why we do not think Stu will come back. I know it's a popular fan theory.

Matthew Lillard wouldn't. He was not happy with Neve Campbell's treatment. It just isn't happening.

#we're watching it totally legally again this year #scream #scream 6 #ghostface #tara carpenter #gale weathers #sam carpenter #kirby reed

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lolitalempicka · 2 years

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why is it that everytime it seems things are going well its all a lie snd im back to square 1

i talked to my mom face to face about how im going to a rehab for my ed and she completely took away my miserable last bit of desire i had to get well, she basically said i dont look ill snough and called me fat... sshe said this to a literal anorexic severly underweight... i know for sure i am worse than last year mentally AND m physically speaking but shes convinced its not like tgat just because this is my normalcy now and im so good at masking my unwellness and im on my feet and not comatose in a bed. her point being the fact im seeking help/ conscious of my situation means its not that bad and not a mental illness i just forget to take care of myself. and my brain says fuck you but also shit shes right. i literally have a written diagnosis from a doctor for the first time in my life which is so scary and unreal but i feel again like im faking it and dont deserve treatment because clearly i wont be sick until i look fucking dead. last night i felt OUT like i am not present atm i ended up getting drunk, vent to my bf on the phone which wasnt helpful at all just made me feel like i was disappointing him. then binge + throw up right next to my parents room where they were sleepin which is something i didnt do even when i was a teen and fall asleep at 11 which means i woke up now that is almost 4 am bc i dont sleep more than 5-6 hours at night. Yea. rn i feel gross, sober, stressed bc later im supposed to see my friends and go to a party but i dont wanna and at the same time the thought of being alone is not comforting anymore bc i know im just gonna lose control if i am. so shouls i go full crazy publicly or do the pretend game once again, do my little theatre thing like i always do and wear my pretty dress and please. i am terrified of not conforming. im used to looking like i have it all together my mom was right on this, so why should i go through the ordeal of recovery when everyone thinks im a functional person and im the last one who wants to, at this point does it even matter. what use is all this sadness when my heart aches all the time when its open

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fortheloveofhoneys · 22 days

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Arts & Culture / November 2016

Deadpan Walking

Norm Macdonald's surprising second act

BY GRANT MUNROEUpdated 14:46, Sep. 14, 2021 | Published 9:14, Oct. 17, 2016 This article was published over a year ago. Some information may no longer be current.

MIDWAY THROUGH a ninety-minute set at the Chrysler Theatre in Windsor last April, Norm Macdonald reached for a list of topics sitting on a stool next to the mic. He held it at a distance from his face, adjusting a pair of spectacles he’d pulled from a pocket in his faded dad jeans. The audience laughed as he mapped out the last half of his routine. Several topics were dismissed—“No. No. Good Lord, no”—before he stopped and winced. “There’s no way I’m doing that.”

“Do it!” a woman shouted.

“Okay, okay, but I feel an obligation to warn the more sensitive souls with us tonight—” He took off his glasses and assumed the stony-ironic mask of seriousness that, a lifetime ago, became one of his trademarks on Saturday Night Live. “What I am about to broach is one of the most difficult things any of us could face. This is an unpleasant topic.”

He slowly folded the scrap of paper, placed it tenderly upon the stool, and grinned boyishly. “Suicide!”

The room exploded.

After arguing against the idea that suicide is cowardly—“What could be less cowardly than murdering yourself?”—he moved on to the costs and benefits of auto-erotic asphyxiation.

“Benefit: an orgasm that’s one-point-five times more pleasurable than a normal orgasm. Cost: a chance your son will discover you blue-faced, tongue out, clutching your cock.”

Macdonald then segued into the topic of death more generally. “Lots of people are scared,” he said. “They’re scared about what’s after this hellish existence . . . . And I’m like them. I don’t know nothing about none of that. Nobody knows what happens after you die. But I do know what happens right after you die. You’re found.”

Waiting for the laughter to subside, Macdonald scratched the back of his neck. “And that’s the worst part, there. That’s the worst part. Being found.”

MORE THAN twenty years ago, Macdonald—like his SNL peers Mike Myers, Adam Sandler, and Sarah Silverman—seemed poised to secure a place in the comedy pantheon. Following a steady rise through the Canadian stand-up circuit, a network debut appearance on David Letterman, and gigs for Dennis Miller and Roseanne Barr, he’d been hired as an SNL writer and cast member in 1993. A year later, he began anchoring the “fake news”—his term for the show’s long-running “Weekend Update” segment. Much of Macdonald’s best humour was less topical, more absurdist—and dark. “The Food and Drug Administration announced today that while one ounce of Special K with four ounces of milk is a good dietary source of protein, one ounce of Special K with five ounces of milk is deadly poison” was one of his characteristically deadpan “news” items.

Rather than chasing easy applause from the studio audience, Macdonald dedicated himself to performing humour he found original—an approach that eventually drew the ire of NBC brass, who were aggressively fighting to boost the show’s then-dismal ratings. They fired Macdonald in 1997 and cancelled a deal with MGM studios for a series of commercials promoting Macdonald’s feature comedy film, Dirty Work. While the movie now enjoys cult status, its box-office numbers were bleak. Macdonald’s 1999 debut sitcom on ABC, The Norm Show, also fared poorly. His career took a nosedive.

But it never hit ground. Macdonald levelled off his glide path and has spent the time since creating a popular, smart comic brand under the mainstream radar. He’s never played the lead in a Shrek, Billy Madison, or Wreck-It Ralph—but he’s done well. And he’s done it on his terms, often independent of the studio system.

If the Windsor show was any indication, many of Macdonald’s current fans were still in elementary school when he was reading fake news on SNL. Most know him entirely from YouTube: stand-up sets, comedy specials, late-night talk-show appearances, and the Norm Macdonald Live podcasts, which feature long-form interviews with the likes of Sandler and Margaret Cho.

After the show, I watched Macdonald plow through a plate of pot roast and potatoes at a late-night diner. With half a dozen young fans in attendance, he told filthy jokes, talked hockey, and bashed Bret Easton Ellis for calling Alice Munro “overrated.” An amateur comic sharing our table asked Macdonald how his routine had developed over the course of his career. “I guess now I always try to kick the prevailing idea of what comedy is, or the attitude behind it,” he said, forking a green bean. “Maybe that had to do with hitting the fifty mark.”

A few months later, I met Macdonald at his two-bedroom condo in a planned community near the Venice neighbourhood of Los Angeles. The place was spare and clean, like an upscale vacation timeshare. Macdonald is mostly itinerant, travelling from club to theatre to club. With his twenty-three-year-old son, Dylan, away at the University of Iowa’s writing program, Macdonald—long divorced and still unattached—had the condo to himself.

After offering me an orange, he sank into a leather-upholstered recliner and kicked off his sneakers. Comfortably dressed in a dark-blue T-shirt and sweatpants, Macdonald had planned to spend a happy afternoon live-Tweeting the third round of the 98th PGA Championship. Bad weather at the Baltusrol Golf Club dashed that dream. So we chatted about his early years, his stand-up, and his book instead.

From his very first sets as a twenty-something amateur comedian in Ottawa, Macdonald stood out thanks to his flat tone—most noticeable at the climax of a punchline. He would often end his payoff sentences with deliberate abruptness, as with this “Update” throwback: “In music news, number one on the college charts this summer was Better than Ezra. And at number two: Ezra.” That’s an iffy joke on paper. But on air, Macdonald’s delivery—and his steady, confident stare—made it work.

His parents, Percy and Ferne, worked as civilian teachers at CFB Valcartier, a military installation just north of Quebec City. Macdonald lived there until he was twelve. He told me he was plagued in his youth by an almost “crippling shyness,” which got worse when he was identified as gifted and skipped two grades. Now both the quietest and smallest boy in his class, Macdonald turned inward, writing lengthy stories conceived as fragments of a larger collection he’d titled I Hate Everybody in My Class. His older brother, Neil, who would eventually become senior correspondent for CBC’s The National, remembered the works as having been akin to “Icelandic sagas.”

Six years ago, when Macdonald successfully pitched his newly released memoir, Based on a True Story, he thought writing it would be easy. But while working on a draft, Macdonald watched a tape of one of his early sets and spiralled into self-doubt: “It was the absolute worst fucking shit you’ve ever seen.” Reading over the little he’d already written, Macdonald decided his first book was destined to be as terrible as his first routine. Only after unburdening himself to a therapist was he able to see the project through.

Based on a True Story rejects the jokey, formulaic, humblebraggy style—and biographical accuracy—of recent comedy memoirs (think Tina Fey’s bestselling Bossypants). Three stories are woven throughout it: a mostly fictionalized history of Norm’s life from birth to his firing from SNL; an outlandish road-trip caper that sees Norm (who in the past struggled with a real-life gambling problem) scheming to make a fortune by gambling on casino credit; and a meta-fictional narrative centred on Norm’s ghostwriter, who exposes the ostensible author as a fraud.

Some lines take their rhythm straight from the comedy club. (“Death is a funny thing. Not funny haha, like a Woody Allen movie, but funny strange, like a Woody Allen marriage.”) The book makes no mention of Dylan or his mother, Macdonald’s former wife. When I asked why, Macdonald told me he would have had to portray his ex in a comic fashion. “I couldn’t figure how to do that without the possibility of offending her.” Their relationship, according to the comedian, is distant but cordial.

His publisher suggested Macdonald include more stories involving Sandler, whom the comedian counts as a friend. None came to mind. “What stories?” he asked rhetorically. “[Sandler] is an incredibly nice guy who’s been generous to me over the span of my entire career. There’s no dirt or anything, holy Lord. And the backstage stuff wasn’t funny. It was just guys talking basketball, trying to think up stuff.”

Indeed, Based on a True Story is completely devoid of celebrity gossip—not because Macdonald doesn’t have any, but because he doesn’t find it funny. He hates “upwardly mobile” schmoozing and happily avoids Hollywood parties: mega-celebrities make him uneasy. “The trouble with those people is that they’re all enormously wealthy,” he told me. He pointed a banana he was eating at the cat toys on the carpet. “I can’t invite them here. And if I go to their place, it’s like being in a museum. Money separates people like crazy.”

“It’s sad, you know, because I used to hang out with Sandler all the time. But now it feels weird. Whenever I go to his place, I’m always worried that he’s worried that I want something from him.” He shrugged. “Even if it’s only my imagination, it makes things uncomfortable.”

Finances notwithstanding, Macdonald’s reputation is first-rate among comedy insiders—as reflected in a glowing profile published recently in the Washington Post. Two days after it ran, the comedian told me, Netflix offered him his own series—no pitch necessary.

WHAT MAKES good comedy resonate with an audience, Macdonald has come to believe, is a comedian’s underlying commitment to truth. “It’s not just the truth in what you say, but in the persona the audience sees performing. You have to learn who you are.”

The real Macdonald can be dark—unsettlingly so. He had to fight with his editor to keep some of his book’s most gruesome passages. One involves a nine-year-old boy with a terminal illness who receives a hospital visit from Norm thanks to a children’s wish-granting organization. “Do you swear to God you’ll make my wish come true, Norm?” the child asks. After initially demurring, the narrator finds himself overwhelmed by “a curious tenderness” and says, “I swear to God”:

The boy looked at me directly and I could see the tears fill his eyes. He spoke softly, his voice quavering and unsteady. “I want to kill a baby seal.”

What follows is an adventure in which Norm takes the boy to Labrador, where the lad crushes the skull of a baby harp seal using a traditional hakapik. After dancing in the gore, the boy makes a miraculous recovery. Two sentences later, back in the city, he is struck and killed by a municipal bus.

“I thought a long time about cutting that part,” Macdonald said. It remains a section he’s unhappy with. Not because of its content, but because of the quality of the writing. “It was rushed,” he admitted. But it had to be kept in order to properly set up the following chapter, “Tiny White Coffin,” in which Norm fumbles through a twenty-minute eulogy.

In one of the most memorable segments of his 2011 Comedy Central special, Macdonald riffed on the psychosexual obsessions of spree murderers, whose victims, he told the audience, always seem to be buried in “shallow graves.” If he were a spree murderer, he said, he would set himself apart by digging “very, very, very deep graves.”

An earlier version of this bit, which Macdonald said ruined countless hour-long sets, was so grim and off-putting that his friends told him to abandon it. But he couldn’t. He knew there was something funny embedded in the horrific premise. The challenge was to discover a crack in the wall that the audience put up. Getting it right, he told me, took a year of field testing in comedy clubs.

The breakthrough, Macdonald said, came when he realized that he had to make it about his own self-directed (and entirely invented) suspicions. “I couldn’t do it in [the] third [person]. It bombed. Too creepy. But when I said, ‘Now, I can’t read the future. I don’t know that I’d never want to kill a girl. Who knows? I’m not Nostradamus. Yet even in today’s enlightened society, there remains a stigma against being a pychosexual sadist.’ When I said that, they knew I was joking, and they’d allow me to do it.”

Though he’s indifferent to politics, Macdonald regrets the growing hypersensitivity among some audiences—mostly on college campuses, which he does not play. “It’s sad,” he says. “Historically, those were the greatest clubs. George Carlin built his career on that circuit.”

“One of the usual questions that people ask comics is, ‘What’s out of bounds?’” He cites fellow comedian Bill Maher, who’s known to do jokes on topics such as 9/11 and AIDS. “[But] the true answer is that if you want to take on a serious topic, fine, but you have to work hard to make it good. There are ways to do it. Bringing up a shocking subject just to get a shocked laugh is retarded.”

That said, Macdonald has tweaked parts of his routine to reflect rapidly shifting societal attitudes to subjects such as transgender people. Caitlyn Jenner once figured in his stand-up—but no more. Macdonald still does all the same jokes, but he uses himself as the target: “When I was young, I said, ‘Dad, I’m a lady.’ He said, ‘But you have a cock.’ I said, ‘Ah, you got me.’ That’s how hateful we were back then. Don’t blame us. We were just hateful people.”

Before his book came out, Macdonald expressed many of the concerns common to debut authors. Was it being pitched to critics and editors properly? Would they understand the story? Would they get the humour? After making a note to call his publicists and suggest a new promotional angle he’d thought of, the comedian apologized.

“I feel weird talking about the book so much,” he said. “I’m just happy it’s over. It’s the worst thing I ever went through, in a way—but fulfilling.”

“The thing that would make me most sad, though,” he added after a moment’s reflection, “is if someone wrote, ‘This comedian thinks he’s a real writer. Well, nice try.’”

This appeared in the November 2016 issue.

Grant Munroe

Grant Munroe has written for the Globe and Mail and Literary Hub.

#norm macdonald

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thefaybul · 3 months

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The Origins of Acting and What is Acting?

Liar, Archilochos, 7th-century BCE Swept overboard, unconscious in the breakers, strangled with seaweed, may you wake up in a gelid surf, your teeth, already cracked into the shingle, now set rattling by the wind, while face-down, helpless as a poisoned cur, on all fours you puke brine reeking of dead fish. May those you meet, barbarians as ugly as their souls are hateful, treat you to the moldy wooden bread of slaves. And may you, with your split teeth sunk in that, smile, then, the way you did when speaking as my friend.

This is a Greek poem from the 7th century and is likely similar to the poem that the first actor may have recited in wooden carts pretending to be the parts from a poem, Thespis. Incidentally this is where the term Thespian comes from which is a term for an actor. We are going to explore acting. Acting then went through many phases and especially in Greece it grew in popularity before being a form of entertainment throughout the entire world. I am not an actor so I felt it best to use the words of actors to explain and elaborate on the points of what acting is in this video.

In fact Stella Adler, an American actor and acting teacher, once said “The word theatre comes from the Greeks. It means the seeing place. It is the place people come to see the truth about life and the social situation.” This leads to what the Greeks used in plays and what acting is actually about which is masks. Ancient Greeks used masks in plays to show the emotion that was meant to be portrayed, thus allowing the audience to know better what is happening.

Nowadays, we look for more emotion and reality in the scenes. As Sanford Meisner once stated about acting “Find in yourself those human things which are universal.” Then as Gary Ballinger said “The more personal, the more universal.” Which brings us to more quotes about acting and why it is so universal and human. Oscar Wilde (hopefully you know that one) said “I love acting. It is so much more real than life.” Which to me, all these quotes say and even from the beginning of acting, the more real and honest the actor's portrayal is the more universal and real it seems therefore it is a better performance. Which brings me to another quote from George Burns “Acting is all about honesty. If you can fake that, you've got it made.” Which means that acting is just that, faking sincerity to illustrate a point or emphasize the emotion of the scene. Acting is pretend to enthrall, entertain, and even to reflect ourselves. Gene Hackman will get the final quote of “Honesty isn't enough for me. That becomes very boring. If you can convince people what you're doing is real and it's also bigger than life -- that's exciting.”

Extra points if in the comments you can tell me what the two masks in Greek plays represented. Next month we will be diving into Songwriting. See you all again soon. Always remember to Be Your Own Fable.

Liar, Archilochos, 7th-century BCE https://bombmagazine.org/articles/1999/10/01/fragments-and-poems-from-the-ancient-greek/

Origin of Theatre - The First Actor https://www.pbs.org/empires/thegreeks/background/24a.html#:~:text=According%20to%20tradition%2C%20in%20534,we%20get%20the%20world%20thespian

50 Great Acting Quotes to Inspire You - https://www.ace-your-audition.com/acting-quotes.html

#actor #actress #acting #entertainment #foryou #new

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