Ok but 2024 is probably going to be the golden year for The Lion King franchise and fandom.
The Lion King 1 1/2's 20th anniversary on February 10th, 2004.
The Lion King Family Tree, a tie-in book for The Lion Guard featuring the family trees of characters from both the movies and the show (and was delayed numerous times during the show's airing,) will finally release on May 4th, 2024, being the first Lion Guard related content to be released after the show's ending. I partially theorize that this book will serve as a decade anniversary tribute to The Lion Guard as it was originally announced in the summer of 2014, concurrently as part of The Lion King's 20th anniversary.
The Lion King's 30th anniversary in June of 2024 (for both a limited and worldwide theatrical release).
The release of Mufasa: The Lion King, the sequel to John Favereu's 2019 remake of The Lion King - Whilst there has been talks of more sequels to the live-action incarceration, nothing has been fully set in stone, so depending on its release, it may be the final installment in The Lion King franchise. Chronologically, The Lion Guard's final episode Return to the Pride Lands serves as an epilogue/ending to the trilogy, but Mufasa: The Lion King should hopefully be the movie that closes this franchise out for good (I'm still in denial and hoping that they aren't going to go a Star Wars and turn this into a shitty cinematic universe).
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If you actually hate how Rachel Zegler disrespects the original Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, do not go see or stream the remake.
If you actually hate how Disney has turned the Lilo & Stitch live-action into a bad statement about race, do not go see or stream it.
If you actually believe that the original The Little Mermaid was perfect and needed no adjustments, and Eric was not a bland prince, do not go see or stream the remake.
If you actually thought that Emma Watson misread and mishandled the role of Belle, who, in the original, was expertly characterized, do not go see or stream the remake.
If you actually believe that the Genie wanted to be free, and Aladdin learned to trust, and Jasmine taught them both how, while the Live Action version ruined that, do not go see or stream the remake.
If you actually believe that the original Lion King movie was perfect and needed no bland NatGeoWild embellishment, do not go see or stream the remake.
If you actually believe that the Cinderella (2015) movie was a good remake, go out and buy the DVD—and then don’t go see and stream the other remakes.
Don’t do it. They don’t read our tumblr rants or watch our rage reels, but they count how many of us go see the new stuff. And they count our money as it goes into their bank account to fund the next one. And they count the time we spend on their streaming services. Teach them that we have standards, and the standards aren’t spectacle, and you can’t just buy us with soulless puppets of our favorite movies.
When you’re tempted to go hear the soundtrack play and listen to the dialogue you miss, just go watch the original. That’s what you really love.
#NotMyDisney alienated me with these last few movies, so I’m not playing the games anymore. Make movies for me, as if I’m the smart child you raised on good movies, or else I won’t go see them. If you guys want me, I’ll be waiting for the day that the Live Action Remake comes out, and then immediately streaming the original on Disney+.
Let ‘em measure how many seats are filled in their theaters, versus how many streams of the originals are playing on the same day.
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Well, since my last post blew up a bit, I figured it’s time for the long-awaited sequel, in a series I like to call:
Why The Lion King 2019′s Realism Sucks Too, Actually
Such Realism. Wow
Now, when it comes to The Lion King 2019′s visual flaws, there is a lot to talk about. From it’s overly-sanitized greenscreen scenery, to the uncanny locomotion, to the positively nightmarish expressions:
hELLo mOtHER
But today, I wanted to focus on one specific area. And that is TLK19′s Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Feet.
Now, when it comes to trying to create something that looks “realistic”, I find it helps to reference well... Reality. So before we begin, I want you to first acquaint yourself with this tasteful handmade collection of lion feet:
Its not weird unless you make it weird
Seriously, don’t just scroll past this to get to the next image. I want you to take at least 2-5 minutes just to look at this picture, and remind yourself of what a real lion looks like. Put on your favorite song, close your eyes, and imagine a blissful reality where The Lion King 2019 does not exist.
Now regrettably, we must exit this imaginary world and return to the hyper-realistic nature documentary known as the Lion King 2019:
oh
oh no
oh dear
I know, right?
Now, what exactly is wrong with these pictures?
1.) The toes are too bony and overly-defined
At best, they look like dog or wolf feet. At worst, they look like fingers, skeletons, sausages, or dinosaurs.
You can see the difference in the comparison down below, between a wolf (left), the remake (middle), and a real lion (right).
The lack of fur and connecting tissue on the feet only contributes to this issue - making the anatomy flaws more noticeable, and overall looks very creepy.
TL;DR:
2.) The legs are too skinny and oddly proportioned, often making them appear bowlegged or off-balance.
This combined with the small, bony feet makes them look more like hyenas or pit bulls than an actual lion. Seriously, if you just looked at the bodies alone, would you even be able to recognize them as lions?
Answer: No. (But feel free to use this Wolf’s Rain base free of charge)
3.) The limbs (particularly the front legs) are robotic and weightless, and do not move in a natural way
His foot is supposed to be off the ground in this shot, for the record.
It’s like they animated the body, legs, and paws completely independently from one another, with no regard for how the different muscles would actually interact with one another in real life.
Here is a real lion for comparison:
Notice how the toes are already turned and outstretched, before they even touch the ground. See how the weight falls onto his other shoulder, and the muscles tensing in it’s back leg as it prepares for takeoff? The paws should be leading the motion, not just added as an afterthought.
Now, let’s return to the remake again:
His legs don’t even look connected to his body, much less the ground.
Thanks, I hate it.
TL;DR:
4. The limbs lack bones, and bend in the wrong places.
help I think his leg is broken call an ambulance
It hurts just looking at this.
I must re-iterate: lions are not dogs.
While I suppose a lion could theoretically walk on their tippy-toes like that, lions tend to weigh an average of 300-700 pounds, as opposed to a wolf’s 70-120. And unless they’re trained ballerinas, putting their full weight on their toes like that would likely be very painful.
The weight distribution should rest closer to where the “ball” of your hand or foot would be - not the actual toe bones themselves.
I wasn’t sure if what I was saying made a lick of sense, so here’s an attempt to illustrate:
At the same time, friendly reminder that lions are not bipedal, and the “heel” should not be touching the ground when standing.
TL;DR:
5.) The claws are always visibly protruding, and look way too small and delicate
It looks like they’re wearing SoftPaws. Thanks, I hate it.
6.) The legs bend, twist, and distort in confusing and unnatural ways.
This is the part I find particularly infuriating. Mr. Jon “ooh, we can’t have pretty skies or expressions or eyebrows or red fruit or a monkey holding a stick because it’s too ~unrealistic~ uwu” Favreau over here.
But then he has the lions constantly do shit like this:
Or this:
And this:
This might be the worst shot in the whole movie. it looks like Sarabi got possessed by a vengeful ghost and is about to use her weirdly human hands to tear Simba apart like a KFC drumstick
but no, obviously I am the fool, and I just don’t “get it”. i love realism that comes at the expense of art. i love corporate nostalgia. i love the lion king 2019, my favorite part is when the motion lines turn into a FUCKING ASTERIX
Such realism. Wow.
Anyways, that about wraps this up, thanks for listening, and I...
Wait a second.
What.
the fuck
Is THAT
Well I need some time to emotionally recover from this, so see you next century for part three - where I’ll be covering either the lighting, the cubs, or the stampede sequence. Whichever I can finish first.
Okay, that’s all for real now, goodbye everyone I’ll remember you all in therapy
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The lion king live-action remake is rough and I don’t love how they changed some songs (They butchered Be Prepared. BUTCHERED IT.)
However I do appreciate that they added a few lines that felt like retconning the story slightly. They smoothed a few things out.
For example, when Scar is intimidating Simba at the end (after accusing him of murder) when he says “Ah I remember where I’ve seen this before… I looked into Mufasa’s eyes… and saw his fear.” Then when he reveals to Simba HE did it, and Simba enraged accuses Scar of murder, I appreciate how in the live action Scar tries to defend himself and his lies. I appreciate that they threw a plot point in to prove to the lionesses that Scar was lying about Mufasa’s death.
Sarabi: “Scar, you said you didn’t get to the gorge on time.”
Scar: “It’s true!”
Sarabi: “Then how did you see the look in Mufasa’s eyes?”
This commences the final battle.
Also they added this line which I believe is absolutely chilling.
Shenzi: “There’s only one true thing you’ve ever said Scar. A hyena’s belly is never full.”
Outright confirming Scar wasn’t just mauled, the hyenas definitely ate him.
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