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unpack-my-heart · 3 years

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This is the first thing I’ve written for the Shameless fandom, but I am utterly besotted with tomato-obsessed-vegetable-growing Ian Gallagher and so wrote this!

He was out there again. This time, he was wearing bright yellow rubber gloves that went right up to his elbows, and they were covered in soft-looking dirt. He’s got a streak of dirt on his face too, powdery, from where he’d presumably wiped the back of his hand across his forehead. His almost-too-orange hair shon brilliantly in the oppressive July sunshine, and Mickey watched as beads of sweat, almost imperceptible, slid down the side of his face.

It was the third time this week that Red has been out there, elbow-deep in mud, or tenderly caressing the lacey tufts of green shooting out of the ground. Sometimes, Red will tug on the tufts, and the soil will give birth to a misshapen carrot, much smaller than the type Mickey buys at the supermarket that come shrink-wrapped in rustly plastic, but Red doesn’t seem to care. He beamed at every fucking carrot as if he’d never seen one before, as if that carrot was the best, most precious thing he’d ever laid eyes on in his entire life.

Mickey watched him as he sprayed something from an unmarked spray bottle onto tomato vines that twist and turn, vein-like, up a beaten-up old trellis. Plump, bulbous tomatoes hung from their stalks, and Mickey watched, feeling more and more voyeuristic, as Red plucked one from the vine and popped it into his mouth. Red chewed slowly, methodically, before smiling, all too wide and with tomato pulp mushed between his teeth. It should be disgusting, and yet, as Mickey watched the blissed-out smile reach Red’s eyes, papery skin crinkling, it’s not. Not anywhere close.

When Mickey moved into the apartment building, he’d barely noticed the garden. The apartment was cheap, suspiciously cheap, but Mickey couldn’t afford to be suspicious. So, when the greasy and smelt-like-onions letting agent had shoved the wad of paper under his nose, he’d signed on the dotted-fucking-line.

“It’s in an up-and-coming area, you know. You’re getting a real steal here, and it’s a ground floor property, no hauling heavy goods up the stairs,” the letting agent had said, tugging at the limp, flaccid tie around his neck.

Mickey had just rolled his eyes and shoved the papers back. “Save the fucking speech.”

It had taken him a pitiful two trips with Iggy’s busted up old pickup to schlep all of his worldly possessions from one side of Chicago to the other. A couple of soggy cardboard boxes filled with miscellaneous crap, a pair of practically broken but still just-about useable kitchen chairs, and a mattress with not a single functioning spring. When Iggy left, pickup grumbling down the street, Mickey had sent Mandy a picture of the chairs stood pathetically in the middle of the otherwise empty room.

She’d sent back a string of laughing emojis, at least when i come and visit i won’t be sitting on the fuckin’ floor

It took Mickey another three weeks to accumulate enough second-hand furniture to pass as a genuinely functioning adult, and by that point, he’d barely opened his blinds, never mind noticed the stretch of scrubland that barely passed for a communal garden that stretched out beyond the confines of his bedroom window. It was by accident that Mickey had happened to open the blinds just as Red was strutting past his window, wrestling with an enormous bag of soil. The soil slipped out of his arms and Red cursed, loud and long enough that it startled a grunt out of a bemused Mickey.

“Fuckin’ shit, fuckin’ slippery bastard, fuckin’ all over my fuckin’ boots! Jesus fuck.”

Hands twitching, Mickey watched as the orange-haired man, resigned to his muddy timberlands, kicked the rapidly emptying bag of soil, before grabbing it with both hands and tugging it along the floor, leaving it to rest in front of three large, raised vegetable beds. Red squatted down and ran his hands over the surface of the soil, head cocked inquisitively.

Mickey stared at the man, hand resting on the window pane, ready to pull it shut and get on with the rest of his day, but before he could, and without warning, Red looked up.

Red looked up, stared directly at Mickey’s swiftly reddening face, and waved.

Feeling like he’d been caught with his hands down his pants by his third-grade English teacher, Mickey slammed the window shut and pulled the blind across, a vital extra layer of protection from the outside.

“What the fuck is wrong with you,” Mickey scolded himself, before purposefully striding out of the bedroom, and slamming the door behind him, resigned to not re-enter the room until he was quite sure that Red had gone.

The next day, after Mickey had dragged his aching bones back from the chop shop, engine oil and miscellaneous grease coating his hands, he’d floated into his bedroom on autopilot. He tugged the blind up, and shoved the window open, eyes blurry and half asleep. A wiggling figure in the distance caught his eye, and his stomach dropped.

Red was out there, forehead damp and glistening in the evening sun. Mercifully, his back was to Mickey, as he leant down, fussing with something buried deep in the pillowy looking earth that covered the surface of the first vegetable bed. Red’s ass wiggled this way and that, a unrhythmic dance to the chirpy evening birdsong, and Mickey let himself watch, eyes glued to the dirt-covered denim, only for a second, before he forcefully pulled the window shut again.

Only, the window groaned loudly, and, ridiculously, Red peered between his splayed legs, and waved at Mickey from his rather precarious upside-down position.

Mickey pulled the blind shut and stomped out of his bedroom, determined to forget about Red and his fucking pruning shears.

The plan, however brilliant in theory, failed miserably in practice, and resulted in Mickey finding himself, yet again, covertly watching Red chew his fucking tomatoes. If Mickey cared, or if he was the kind of guy that had some sort of gardening glove fetish, he would have realised that Red tended to the garden in the evening, when the sun dipped, bloated and heavy, below the treeline, and bathed the grass in dazzling, shimmering golden light. If Mickey cared, or if he was the kind of guy that jerked off furiously in the shower thinking about the way the muscles in Red’s arms rippled, taut, when he hauled bags of soil from one end of the garden to the other, he would have devised a way of opening his blind just so, just enough to see out of, but not enough that Red could see his peering, lurking face.

For a kid who had grown up in the underbelly of Chicago, whose first word was ‘fuck’, only to be followed by ‘you up’, Mickey had been remarkably quick to come to terms with the fact that he only liked fucking dudes. The first time he’d slept with a chick, the noisy, breathy, wetness of it all had kept his dick limp and his ego in tatters, and she’d thrown him out of her bedroom with a ‘fucking faggot’ for good measure. He’d slept with countless other women since then, a painful exercise in compulsory heterosexuality, and as he ploughed into them from behind, he’d screw his eyes shut and pretend the fleshy give of their hips was tight, coiled muscle, and pretend that their high-pitched blabbering were deep, guttural moans. It hurt, every time, when they’d slink off, hair mussed and lipstick smudged, and he’d be left splayed lifelessly on damp sheets that smelt like sex, but he managed. He had to manage. Until Terry Milkovich, silverback gorilla, had died in a wheezing, heaving mess on the kitchen floor, and Mickey was free.

He fucked his first guy on the night of the funeral, was fucked by his first guy three nights later, and never looked back. Mickey was pretty comfortable with what he liked and liking what he liked didn’t make him a bitch.

But this? Staring at some guy whispering sweet nothings to his peppers, hiding behind the blind every time he so much as glanced in Mickey’s general direction? This was horrifyingly close to pining, teetering on the edge of teenage puppy love infatuation type shit, and it set Mickey’s teeth on edge. Milkovich’s didn’t do crushes.

A knock on the window startled him, shattering his belligerent introspection and rattling his bones.

It was Red, who had somehow managed to creep his way across the scrubby lawn, up to Mickey’s window. Mickey blinked at him, dumbly.

Red started to speak, but Mickey couldn’t hear him.

“The windows closed; I can’t hear you!” Mickey shouted, dumbly.

Shit.

Red stepped out of the way, just in time, and Mickey shoved the window open.

“Uh, window was … y’know. What the fuck do you want?”

Red smiled.

“Do you want a tomato?”

#shameless #gallavich #ian gallagher #mickey milkovich #ian x mickey #ian gallagher x mickey milkovich #shameless us #tw: slurs #tw: the word f*ggot is mentioned #in passing though #this is just ridiculous but i had fun writing it!!

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springfieldblues · 4 years

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my long ass review for S32E03 Now Museum, Now You Don’t

warning: LONG because i rambled about history more than i thought i would

id been looking forward to this one because i like art history, especially after seeing how they tried their best to stick to historical accuracy in the previous episode I, Carumbus. this time however….they didnt try that hard. i dont know why i thought theyd go through that sort of trouble again LMAO

but its okay, i dont really expect the simpsons to be the paragon of historical accuracy or anything. especially in anthology episodes told through a particular character's lens (in this case, lisa, whos already feverish so whatever)

first i just wanna say that this is, i guess, less of a review and more of an accidental list of history fun facts. so im just gonna get my general thoughts out of the way first.

the episode was fun! to me at least haha. i mean it got me to think and do a lot of research on my own so that must count for something. besides a couple of really weird ones, the jokes were good. anthology episodes tend to be….not that good but i thought this one was one of the better ones so far. idk.

anyway on to lisanardo da vinky its the renaissance! jesus christ the italian accents in the beginning of this segment were annoying as hell but i also feel like that was the joke lmao. ill be real i kind of tuned out for a second there when grampa started rambling so idk what he said.

i told myself i wouldnt get nitpicky with historical accuracy if the jokes were funny (final edit: so that was a lie) but this meh bit with the pizza guys and mascots was really not worth ignoring the fact that its impossible for italy to have any tomato-based food in the 15th century (tomatoes were brought to europe from the americas in the 16th century, and pizza as we know it today—flatbread, cheese, tomato—originated in the late 18th century)

oh this next part was kind of legit tho. lisanardo, like the real leonardo, became andrea del verrochio's apprentice at his workshop. i loved this next bit:

"Whoever paints the sweetest cherub will have the honor of having MY name signed on their work. That's what great artists do!"

SO YEAH as it turns out, lisanardo painted the sweetest cherubs. the painting here is called The Baptism of Christ, and the real leonardo assisted verrochio in finishing it. specifically, he painted the cherubs in the corner.

this causes verrochio to quit and go someplace with less talented people: a music school (yes, verrochio did quit painting after getting owned by young leo and his mad angel painting skills. he never did anything with music tho, he was more of a sculptor)

alongside lisanardo, in mr largo-verrochio's workshop we have barticelli (botticelli bart), dolphatello (donatello dolph), ralphael (raphael...ralph) and mediocrito (no one that i know of. sorry milhouse) (and kearney i guess but they dont refer to him by name). botticelli and donatello are said to have also been apprentices at verrochio's workshop, but raphael came a couple of decades later so he couldnt have been there. and donatello was too old so that claim is a bit questionable. but anyway

it IS true that leonardo's peers envied him, to the point where he was anonymously and purposefully accused of being gay (a major crime punishable by death in 15th century florence) while he was still working at verrochio's workshop

we are then treated by what im pretty sure is the fourth time the show has used 'at seventeen' by janis ian, this time sung by a dejected lisanardo (man they really do keep making yeardley sing these days huh) who only wishes to be appreciated and not envied.

"I'll show them all! I'll show them all in a secret diary that no one will decipher for 400 years!"

some of lisanardo's future inventions. who wouldve known

so after barticelli, for some reason (revenge??? or something?? what was his plan here idgi) steals lisanardo's diaries full of blueprints of her inventions and takes them to mr burns who i have to assume is pope alexander VI here, they decide to use her inventions for war.

"With these, we can kill the most evil people in the world!! ....Slightly different Christians."

leo actually did this of his own accord. im surprised this is what they decided to do with lisanardo instead of talking about leo's love of nature and vegetarianism (not a single mention of that in this episode? come on...) then again, trying to do good only to end up indirectly making things worse is a very standard lisa storyline. i guess they didnt want to miss the chance to have evil pope burns (very fitting, especially for that era since they were all about money and controlling the people)

so lisanardo decides to leave for france, unlike the real leonardo who was more or less persuaded by his ultimate fanboy king francis I to move to france.

"Lisanardo, I have many questions. Why are you hitting yourself? A nerd says 'what'? And how is it possible that I am rubber and you are glue? Et cetera, et cetera."

that line may seem a little random, like hes just nelson saying nelson things (and i mean, obviously he is) but the real francis also "had an unquenchable thirst for learning, and Leonardo was the world’s best source of experimental knowledge. He could teach the king about almost any subject there was to know, from how the eye works to why the moon shines." so yeah, he did have many questions and lisanardo, finally being appreciated for her intellect, was happy to answer them all. its very interesting how lisa assigned this role to nelson in her retelling of da vinci’s life :^)

and so she lived the rest of her days in france, nat king cole's 'mona lisa' plays because duh, and they make a da vinci code reference because duh. and the segment ends. and not a single time did they show the actual mona lisa painting. the fuck?

(ngl i was fully expecting bart to say 'leonardo da vinky' for a second here)

so this next segment is about french impressionist painters, most likely the batignolles group, a name adopted by the early representatives of impressionism. its much more vague than the lisanardo segment since no one here is referred to by name (except moe, more on him in a sec) but i dont feel like it really matters in this case. bart is prrrrooobably claude monet but its hard to say, this segment is kind of a mish-mash of a lot of things. also i gotta say i really liked how lisa introduced the story to bart with an 'if you hate the formal study of art' and not 'if you hate art' because thats exactly my headcanon. i LOVE the concept of artist bart and whenever its referenced it just makes perfect sense to me.

anyway the segment opens in 1863 at the école des beaux-arts (back then it was actually known as the académie des beaux-arts), preserver of traditional french art styles. skinner reviews his students’ paintings one by one. praises the plain, unimaginative paintings depicting your typical european countryside landscapes. very run-of-the-mill (haha get it...cuz theres….a windmill) (although the real académie didnt approve of such basic stuff, they wanted artists to draw epic historical and mythological scenes) then he gets to barts painting and he gives him an F- because the painting made him think.

(the paintings in this scene arent real famous paintings as far as i know but they are inspired by real paintings enough to get the point across)

in comes barney dressed as bacchus as a model for the students to sketch, which i just loved:

barney: “You prefer robe open or robe off?” skinner: “Just cover your privates with this walnut shell.” barney: “Whoa!!! So roomy!”

skinner gasps in horror at bart’s sketch, which “looks nothing like him” and bart explains that “it shouldn’t; we’re making the art that we feel because we can’t compete with a camera.” damn, you go bart. take that, realism. draw what you feel!!

(also no, you didnt need to hold still for 17 hours for a daguerreotype. 30 min tops.)

nelson haw-haw of the week: FOIE-gras!

so here they are at the moulin rouge (“enjoy it before baz luhrmann ruins it” hey shut up. i love that movie), which wouldnt be built for another 26 years, but it is the most widely known gathering place for bohemians in the public consciousness so i can understand why they went with the moulin. nelson delivers this anachronistic line:

“This époque keeps getting beller and beller!”

which alludes to la belle époque, the golden age of france usually dated from 1880 to 1914. made me snort so ill let that slide

and heres moe! as henri de toulouse-lautrec, who was actually born a year after the year this segment is set in. yo moe szyslak he was just 1

toulouse-moetrec introduces himself as the chronicler of the demimonde (not an actual job). an iconic figure associated with the moulin rouge (largely due to his affinity for alcohol and prostitutes), toulouse-lautrec was also a painter, having illustrated a series of posters for the moulin himself. he simply had to be in this segment, anachronisms be damned, just because they decided to include the moulin. cant have one without the other.

and yes he did have a walking cane where he kept his liquor.

i love how everyone drinks absinthe in this place. theyre bohemians what else would they drink

toulouse-moetrec points out that barts paintings are the greatest thing hes ever seen (and hes seen like five things!) and that hes a genius. milhouse realizes that they should stop doing what the teacher says and use their own minds to instead...start doing what bart says lmao. to the easels!

next we have skinner hyping up chalmers about the art his students made for the salon de paris, an art exhibition that the emperor of france will attend. he assures him that none of these paintings will encourage debate, provoke thought or be out of place at a dentist’s office. when they unveil the art, theyre both SHOCKED at how scandalous the paintings actually are.

this reaction was kind of accurate. impressionism was severely rejected at the salon de paris, due to paintings not looking finished enough to them, they thought they were ugly and vulgar for depicting nudity in a contemporary setting (historical and mythological nudity was fine). these impressionist paintings were sent to the salon de refusés, which is. yeah. the place where they sent the rejects. the salon de refusés does not make an appearance but this scene makes a reference to it when the artists get expelled from the royal salon. also:

“What about our student loans?” “Oh they’ll be refunded. We are not barbarians, I mean, come on.”

(god if only)

so the painters are down because they want the emperor to actually see their paintings. toulouse-moetrec pipes in once again with an idea.

“There is one thing the emperor loves more than anything.” “France?” “No, he hates France.”

apparently the emperor really loves cheese, which makes sense since its napoleon III (who loved cheese) and homer (who loves cheese.) so the painters roll into the salon inside a giant wheel of cheese (obviously.) as lenny said, “Eh, you know French cheese. Very runny.” napoleon III chases after the wheel into a room, where the wheel falls apart after getting chomped on by the emperor. now that they got his attention, the painters proudly show the emperor their impressionist art, which he couldnt be more indifferent about because he just wants to eat his cheese dammit, and he awards them with the royal medallion just to kind of get them out of his way. skinner immediately starts kissing ass (as he does) until marge’s like ‘hey wait a minute. you expelled these students from the royal salon’ and an executioner immediately starts ominously measuring skinners neck.

“Uh, sir...is your tongue sticking out because you’re dead or because you’re mad at me?”

and thats the end of that lmao (gore in this episode, gore in the last episode, and next week we’re getting gore too cuz its THOH, what the hell is goin on)

we get a short intermission with maggie, who wants a story for her too! lisa tells her that renaissance artists loved to put babies in their paintings, especially baby angels.

here she is showing her The Triumph Of Galatea by raphael:

King David Playing The Harp by peter paul reubens:

and a very simplified version of pretty much any depiction of hell by hyeronimus bosch lmao:

not much else to say about this one, really. but i really liked that sky!

the last segment is about frida kahlo and diego rivera. or as bart puts it ‘the one about a fat guy whos wife is too good for him.’ i was REALLY looking forward to this one because i love frida and i thought itd be a cool opportunity for animators to go bonkers and do really cool shit with her art as inspiration…..but the segment is not about frida, its about diego and his selling out to capitalism. and its also yet another story with homer and marge drama. no funky cool animation here. sigh i guess i’ll take it

the story begins in 1929 at la casa azul, frida’s home (now museum dedicated to her life and work.) frida and diego are getting married. this courtyard definitely did not look this way yet back in 1929. also theres something very cringy yet funny about lovejoy saying spanish words the way he does, i honestly cant decide how i feel about that one

the writers know theyre being cringy with their gringoness so they go along with it.

moe: “Spanish for ‘best wishes’!” mel: “Spanish for ‘congratulations’!” bumblebee man: “Spanish for ‘muy bueno’!”

OH YEAH BUMBLEBEE MAN this is his new voice actor, eric lopez! hes not mexican but its still great to finally have a latino actor voicing a latino character and hes very excited to be part of the show so i hope to hear more of him!! im rooting for him

el barto/zorro makes an appearance which i am very confused about. he has jack shit to do with frida and diego and mexico in the 20s-30s. el zorro was set in the spanish california of the early 19th century. their use of the original theme song makes me think they just wanted to flex their disney privileges tbh

lets not talk about that that whole scene was bad

anyway diego announces he and frida are going to new york, without even asking her first. frida is obviously pissed.

“Don’t worry, as a woman, you’ll be treated with much more respect in America.”

so in new york, diego is having a bit of a business meeting with mr burns as one of the members of the rockefellers, who is commissioning him to draw a mural for the rockefeller center. its kinda funny how he refers to him and frida as socialists even though they were very much communists lmao its okay you can say it. ok so far, but then frida says ‘yes, we hate the capitalists! right now, a young socialist is being born who will take them down! mr. bernie sanders. i hope hes quick about it’ and that was a simple enough joke and couldve been left at that but then its immediately followed by this weird as fuck family guy-esque cutaway gag to bernie as a baby:

“Getting a cootie shot should not cost your lunch money. And if you don’t listen to me, listen to the Bernie Babies! What? Everybody’s got goons.” *larger babies start beating up this other baby* “I disavow that, and welcome it.”

this confused me so much that i had to ask one of my american friends to help me understand, but even she was like ‘uhhh yeah thats a weird joke,’ especially now that hes been out of the race for months (then again these episodes take almost a year to produce. i guess they couldnt be bothered to replace it with something more relevant.) whatever that was weird and confusing and unfunny moving on

frida is pretty irked that diego is going through with this deal. after all, it goes against everything they believe in. im not sure how the real frida felt about diego doing the mural, but she did feel a bit of rage during her visit to the united states, especially the obvious disparity between rich and poor. she hated having to interact with capitalists and found americans very boring. in this segment, frida seems to be acting more like the american communist party, which diego got kicked out of for accepting commissions from wealthy patrons. in any case, frida is pretty upset about this whole thing.

and finally we get the first and only kind of surreal frida moment. kinda. maybe. its more cartoonish than anything but im desperate ok

interesting how they felt like they had to add a “don’t smoke” in big letters after showing patty and selma flying away on their giant cigarettes. i wonder if this is something theyre making them do now? i remember hearing something about them toning down patty and selma’s smoking

diego comes home to frida, drunk as hell, followed by the marx brothers. i cant believe they didnt make a marxism joke come on it was RIGHT THERE. THE MARX BROTHERS. KARL MARX. COME ON

frida paints her feelings.

this makes diego realize that frida is a genius and he is not half the artist she is. he proclaims he will now show his awe of her by sleeping with other women, starting “an hour ago.” to which frida replies, “and i will start sleeping with other women, starting two hours ago.” yes this was pretty much their relationship. though im just wondering how the hell did diego not know frida was this kind of artist until now? i know homers an idiot but jeez. art was how frida and diego met, diego knew from the get-go that frida was an incredible artist. i guess the fame got to his head or something. again, homer just being stupid.

“well enough already, while the art is still deco, okay?”

its time for the mural diego painted, Man At The Crossroads, to be unveiled:

rockefeller examines it. good and great so far, and then...uh oh

“Who’s that fellow…? With the beard, and the bolshevik smile…” “That’s the founder of Soviet Russia, Lenin!”

“B-b-but he’s a communist!” “Oh he just attended a couple of meetings.”

rockefeller will not have this communist in the temple to capitalism that is the rockefeller center, so he orders diego to paint over it. diego stands his ground and refuses. despite rockefeller’s threats, diego says that theres only one person he wants to be proud of him no matter what and in true homer & marge fashion, frida is touched by this. they happily leave the rockefeller center.

now, the real story of Man At The Crossroads and the rockefeller center was actually not that different. as soon as the rockefellers found out diego had snuck in a portrait of lenin into the mural, they ordered him to paint over it, to which he refused. diego even offered to include abraham lincoln and even american abolitionists in the mural as a compromise, but the rockefellers simply did not want any references to communism whatsoever. they did not complain about the hammer and sickle, though. yes, they did know diego was a communist and hired him anyway. what did they expect? lmao. diego said:

"Rather than mutilate the conception [of the mural], I shall prefer the physical destruction of the conception in its entirety, but preserving, at least, its integrity."

so they decided to destroy the mural before it was even finished and they never talked to each other again.

diego then repainted the mural at the palacio de bellas artes back in mexico, this time known as Man, Controller of the Universe. this new version included even more communist leaders and a depiction of john d. rockefeller jr. drinking at a nightclub, right underneath a depiction of syphilis bacteria. cue nelson haw-haw:

this was the version they used in the episode also, since the original was, well, never finished and also destroyed. only a black and white photograph of it exists, taken by diego before it was destroyed so he could remake it.

right so, homer!diego then pulls a Barthood and finishes the episode with a large mural summarizing the entire episode. he says some rick and morty thing i didnt get because i dont watch the show idk idc

the end

ALRIGHT NOW ITS TIME FOR THE STORY OF VINCENT VAN MOE

#if you read all of this bless you #the imageless gdocs version of this is 8 pages long #hope you...enjoy?!?! these art history fun facts?!?!#dont let me do something like this again but also let me know if i should do something like this again #i was really only motivated to do this because im already passionate about the subject so idk if i could do it otherwise #anyway. this took me all day yesterday because the power kept going out #but im finally done #bye

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treeofonelife · 5 years

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Recently it came to my (scarcely existing) attention that most people think it is bad to love on obscure minor characters in stories. I have never understood why, because...

These characters were written by someone, and if they have enough recognizable characteristics to be likeable (despite they have very little role and dialogue), then you can bet there was effort put in writing them. Laconic is one of the hardest things to write. This means they were worked on by somebody, loved by somebody, and somebody out there (the writer) wishes their care for the character would be shared by others (the fans).

There is no shame in being in for more than big buff serious heroes. These guys need love; they have it bad already with not being The Hero themselves!

Please Do Love on minor characters, because if it becomes something bad or viewed as wrong, writers will stop putting cool, three-dimensional, interesting characters in those minor roles, and then who will we love on? (Please appreciate the logic bomb with ample amount of rotten tomatoes. Thank you. I like tomatoes.)

So here is a brave, but not full list of many minor and often-overlooked characters whom I absolutely love; both in games and literature:

Lord of the Rings

Tom Bombadil

Fangorn (Treebeard, the elder ent)

Bregalad (Quickbeam, a younger ent... by ent years, that is!)

Harry Potter

Gilderoy Lockhart

(and many others, but I believe nearly every minor character gets some love from that fandom)

Aion

Kaoranerk (An inventor shugo who lived in the very Abyss; he said his wife left him because he was too obsessed with his experiments. Sad, sad shugo, nyerk!)

Gestanerk (It seems he is some crime lord at first, but soon it turns out he is an abused enslaved shugo, like all the others around him.)

Hamerun the Bleeder (The mad asmodian smuggler. He provided a rather anticlimactic boss fight, but I wish we knew more about who he is - allegedly even the elyos had some more info on him!)

Lumiel, the Lady of Wisdom (I won't forgive her inventing mechas in a fantasy world, but I wonder if she really turned out to be child-bodied...?)

Freyr, one of the high priests of Asmodae (You walk up to a fellow Named This Way, you know he is the cleric trainer and one of the high priests… The fella is stanging in a central place in the main leaders’ hall. Annnd… he wears a very cheap leather armor, and nearly calls you "dude" or something alike. Gotta love him.)

Diablo III

Covetous Shen ("You try to give a young man some advice, and he assumes you are the Xiansai god of thieves...")

Captain Haile ( "They're all dead and we're not, I call that a win, eh?" Fun fact: you can even find his kids in Westmarch; they are both brave and know how to fight, despite only being around 6 and 12! Yes, they survive, don't worry. Just do your freaking job as a hero, and they'll be fine.)

The Elder Scrolls III Morrowind

Ahnassi ("Ahnassi listens, Ahnassi hears.'')

Galbedir ("Have you been helping Ajira with the bet? Go ahead. I have many tricks of my own. Even you and Ajira together can't stop me from winning.")

The Elder Scrolls IV Oblivion

Gin-Wulm (The master smith in the Imperial City - he is humble, but expects dedication if you want his knowledge. He values his art, and expects you to value yours, too.)

Thumindil (A sailor in Anvil harbour without any quest involvements. He seems to have contracted greenspore at some point though, if we can believe the relevant experiences in Morrowind before that: he shows the symptoms of it with almost medical-book-grade accuracy.)

Thadon (No-one would have guessed that. lol )

Tall-Trees-Falling (The Shivering Isles is home to some really strange people, full of dichotomy...)

Ushnar gro-Shadborgob (“He is on this one's Most Feared List”; from Crucible)

Gan Luseph (The castle healer in Bruma. He is better at Destruction than Restoration, and he isn't very proud of that. This becomes a neat Checkov's gun at the siege of Bruma, where he acts as a backup battle mage!)

Althel (The scout and archer at the fortress of Vitharn. The only one there, who cannot be blamed for their failure in any shape or form. We don't even ever see her alive, but still gotta love her!)

Gaia Online

Brennivin (I feel for the guy, being foreign and all), and Radio Jack

Ian (and Rufus)

Old Man Logan,

and Agatha.

In my own stories

Caleb Kay (I have honestly no idea what I like on him. I've even tried to kill him off to make sure he doesn’t re-occur just because I fell in love with the character, but even that didn't work. I'm hopeless. I simply love this guy for some indefinable reason, sadly. Maybe it is something with me and crazy obsessed old scientists looking for answers to questions that nobody asked...)

Claude Weller (His aging and mental regress gets used for measuring time by another character once. Minor character status doesn't get any worse than that, trust me. Might as well dye his armor red, and forget his name. And yet, not only he lives to see that happening (because writer loved him enough for that...), but he even reoccurs, and has his own stories and bits of background and lore! He was planned to be an rp character first, before I have realized I am discarded from the rp community here as much as anywhere else.)

Vivain-Sul (Does he even count as a "minor" character? He only exists to die in the story, and yet still has half a page of backstory and more lines of dialogue than any rp-able oc i have ever written about, I think...)

#long post #long. run while u can!#writing #text #bs #opinion #@k1spiegel

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gigiloveheart05 · 5 years

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okay but its your own personal hell

so WHY DO GUYS LIKE ME?! I mean I'm thicc and hang out with boys, BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN IM STRAIGHT, and guys keep saying they crushes on me (eather desperate, being assholes, or actually like me) heres some fact points

1. okay so I was at a table washer table talking with a friend (we'll call him grezel because d&d) and eating lunch till he had to go and then I was without my bud one of the girls said the boy who was next to me had a crush on someone and they told me to actually guess I guessed the other two (bc ya know) and then tea is spilt aka he like likes me and my face is a Christmas tree

2. two girls, one of the girls got weirdly friendly with me and that just unnerved me I was "okay I enjoy your company but plz leave meh alone." and the other girl was one of the girls who said that a boy had a crush on me and they asked if grezel was my boyfriend which I said no I told him what happened and a couple of my other friends and let's just say tiny dude seemed like he wanted to snap their necks and bust their kneecaps sir.pelo style and the plot twist is grezel wanted to be my boyfriend which was okay but honeymoon phase ended after I sang let it go and cant stop the feeling at the Stump tournament

3. so I was chilling with grezel and ian (another d&d charater the friend who was also hanging out with me made) one day when it was time for the field day thing and I didn't realize I was group nine so I stayed and hung out with them and the girls (the two girls who told me a boy liked me and the girl that freaked me the fuck out) and the two girls are like "ArE yOu TwO dAtInG?!" and me and grezel were like "NO SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

4. apparently there was a rumor around team that I was dating grezel and NO ONE ASKED FOR CLARIFICATION FROM ME OR GREZEL UGGGGGHHGGUFDUFRUHDTH

5. alot of dudes throughout the year we're "HEY HE HAS A CRUSH ON YOU!" well not alot but it felt like it

I also got revenge on those two girls by coming out the closet because HOLY SHIT IT FELT LIKE I WAS GONNA NEED A HOODIE AND A SHIRT SAYING I AM GAY and I felt like I was about to lose my S H I T and I got it by one word yearbook.

moral of the story; hetronormatiy is a bitch and istg i need to put signs up around the school saying not everyone is straight

also Dan is right knowing someones sexuality

I also know an openly gay/lesbian girl in my school and apparently I'm not gay enough because I'm not wearing flannel EVERY DAY OF THE SCHOOL Y E A R "well don't mind me if I wanna wear only fleece lined leggings and hoodies/sweaters every cold day of the school year!"

okay I'm just gonna go on a gay streak

so there was this girl who looked like alessia cara and I was placed next to her and I couldn't look at her because she was so FUCKING H O T until I was chill with it and I didn't turn into a tomato every time I looked at her. I also had a crush on a friend of mine which I nicknamed her kimmyco since she acted like a cat sometimes so I'll use that so we were at recess when I said oh look at me I'm *inster Male name* I loooove *insert other Male name here*." (dont worry we were okay with it) and he was like oh yeah and then he said "oh look at me I'm Laura and I LOOOOOVE kimmyco!" and we just laughed it off until we went inside and that's when I kept asking myself if I was actually loved her and then the thought of her leaving one of her cardigans here and then it elaborated like wild fire to so many things like getting married, having a life together, going on a date (to find the girl that creeped me the fuck out and her friend dating and yes I kinda shipped them which I would consider karma), and hell even an alternate universe which I won't go into, I'm not even sure I have a crush on her to this day and on September 18th of 2018 my heart was broken she also told she was dating another dude who was her crush and the reason why I didnt wanna confess in the first place and I cried at fanfic for a good couple of months (but now he broke up with her after about a year). Earlier on during the year before I fallen for Kimmyco, it was the first day of school for the 7th time (I skipped a grade) and I had the urge to kiss a girl who was tracing my face when she was complaining about her makeup melting off but realization hit me that I didnt know her name even knew HER I also never asked for consent so you best bet your ass I felt guilty as hell. oh yeah I also kissed a ghost, dont ask, long story short i found out about things that have been with us our whole lives, i met my guide named lalani, she kissed me like three time, my first kiss was when I could feel her like shivers and I was terrified, second time because of a song, and third because my lips were puckered for no reason.

so theres my rant ya happy?

#yes im gay #i called myself bi for 2-3 years before realizing women were hotter #i also deviantart to thank and one of my wierd fascinations

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empress-of-snark · 6 years

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(this header by @caseyblu is cooler than the actual movie)

THOR: THE DARK WORLD (2013)

AKA: All roads lead to Svartalfheim.

(Alternately, “Make the universe dark again!”)

(Spoilers for both Thor 2 and a tiny bit of Thor 3.)

Much as I wanted to enjoy this movie, it’s just… so forgettable. The villain is boring as hell, Jane is just kind of there, and they’re trying to make her important but it’s not working, and knowing that Loki is really alive takes all the emotion out of his ‘death’ scene (especially after that part in Ragnorak, you know, where Matt Damon plays Loki, lmao).

First of all, it starts off almost exactly like the first Thor movie. “Long ago, we Asgardians were at war with this other race, and we fought a lot, and we won, but at what cost?” Been there, done that with the Jotunheims, Odin. It was also very reminiscent of the prologue to Fellowship of the Ring. Maybe it was just the color scheme.

We were watching a possibly illegal version online which, for whatever reason, didn’t have subtitles for the Dark Elves, so we had no idea what Malekith was saying, ever. Here’s the thing though: it didn’t matter at all. Other than like, making it clear that he’s out there planning stuff, pretty much all of Malekith’s scenes are nearly arbitrary. I looked up some of the lines online and it’s all just stuff like “Asgardians are weak and the dark days are coming soon, blah blah blah.” If that’s all your villain says for the whole movie, get a new villain. I can’t believe they wasted Christopher Eccleston’s talent on this two-dimensional cardboard cutout of an antagonist.

Thor already went through all his character development in the first movie, so he’s really got nowhere to go here. He’s pretty boring. Like, honestly, he’s one of the most boring characters in the movie, and it’s his movie.

But Jane is perfect for him, because she’s also boring in this one. She’s a vessel for the aether, and nothing more. Oh, and she’s kind of rude to her perfectly nice date, Richard.

Sorry if we’re being really harsh here, by the way. I feel like this is harsh, but it also needs to be said.

As always, I have no idea exactly how immortal Asgardians are. Frigga takes a knife to the gut and she dies immediately, yet Loki gets impaled with a sword and somehow survives? Also, if Frigga is capable of the same magic that Loki is, I feel like there was something more she could’ve done to get out of that situation. But no, kill the woman to propel the men’s stories forward.

There were a few good points in this movie! I need to say something positive, this is ridiculous. For one thing, I completely forgot about Captain America’s cameo and it was great. Now I need to find that behind-the-scenes clip of Tom in the Cap suit, pretending to be Loki impersonating Cap.

Zachary Levi is a delight as Fandral/Robin Hood. No idea why he had to be recast, but honestly, I don’t really care. He got a glo-up, just like Bruce Banner.

Darcy steals nearly every scene she’s in and again I am very sad that this is her last MCU movie (As far as we know…). This is weird, but I’m also sad that she never got to meet Loki. I just feel like that would’ve been a really interesting combination and possibly hysterical.

One more good point is that Thor and Loki’s sibling interactions are so accurate. One of the best scenes was Loki’s irritating backseat driving while Thor was desperately trying to figure out how to drive the Elf ship, shouting at Loki to shut up.

This movie isn’t a complete waste of time and it’s worth a rewatch, but it’s definitely not one of Marvel’s better installments. At the most, it helps set up Infinity War by introducing the Reality Stone.

RANKINGS: Hero: 6 Myeh-myeh’s out of 10. The most that can be said for Thor in this movie is that losing his mother and (apparently) his brother makes him realize that he needs to spend more time with the ones he loves, i.e. Jane. But this is pretty understated, and the fact remains that he’s still pretty boring for most of the movie.

Villain: 2 wasted Doctors out of 10. Malekith is just… the most boring villain. Explaining this ranking implies that there’s anything more to be said about him. There’s not.

Supporting characters: 6 interns out of 10. Basically anyone who’s not Thor and Malekith. Honestly, the supporting characters are the only thing that make this movie even a little bit interesting. My brother says that the most telling thing about this movie is that he was almost more interested in Darcy and Ian than Thor and Jane. Female characters: 5.5 Bechdels out of 10. Again, this one passes the test because of Jane and Darcy, and it still has all four of its women from the first one. However, Frigga is killed at the halfway mark, and Sif and Jane are pitted against each other in a love triangle that goes nowhere and adds less than nothing to the plot.

Action scenes: 6 punches out of 10. There’s one major fight scene at the end, and about three little ones before, but none of them are terribly memorable, aside from the deaths. The coolest part is when Jane and Selvig manage to teleport little groups of Dark Elves all over the city.

Stan Lee: 3 cameos out of 5. Not a very impressionable cameo, but it gets a good laugh.

Charisma: 4 points out of 10. At the very least, it was devoted to its aesthetic. But this movie just feels lacking overall. The themes aren’t really played out as much as they could’ve been and it definitely leaves you unsatisfied.

In total: 32.5 out of 65--50% exactly. Rotten Tomatoes gave it 66%.

Next is Captain America: The Winter Soldier!

#marvel #thor the dark world #great marvel rewatch of 2k18

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ladystylestores · 4 years

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The Enormous Black-White Wage Gap

Want to get The Morning by email? Here’s the sign-up.

Good morning. U.S. coronavirus cases set a daily record. Policing bills hit a wall in Congress. And Democrats lead in several Senate races. Let’s start with a look at the black-white wage gap.

One remarkable sign of the racial inequities plaguing the United States: The wage gap between black and white men is as large today as it was in 1950.

If you look at the government’s official wage statistics, you’ll see a somewhat different story. Those number show that the wage gap is smaller than in the mid-20th century.

But the official statistics are misleading. They exclude people who are not working — and there has been a sharp rise since the 1980s in the number of black men who don’t work.

Some have dropped out of the labor force, no longer looking for work after having failed to find decent-paying blue-collar jobs (a trend that has also hurt men of other races, though not as badly). Others are incarcerated. Over all, even before the recent economic downturn, about 30 percent of black men between the ages of 25 and 54 were not working, much more than in previous decades.

As a result, the official statistics on wages and many other economic subjects ignore a growing segment of the black population. They cover only those men fortunate enough to be working. “It’s a weird hole,” Kerwin Kofi Charles, the dean of the Yale School of Management, told me.

When you take a comprehensive look at black and white men — as Charles and another economist, Patrick Bayer of Duke University, have done — you see that the black-white male wage gap is as large today as it was when Harry Truman was president. (I go into more detail, including charts, in this article.)

From The Magazine: “Racial income disparities today look no different than they did the decade before King’s March on Washington,” Nikole Hannah-Jones writes. “More critical, the racial wealth gap is about the same as it was in the 1950s as well. The typical black household today is poorer than 80 percent of white households.”

The central reason is centuries of government policies that have denied opportunities to black Americans — from slavery to the Homestead Act to Jim Crow laws to federally mandated segregation that affects housing prices today. The only solution, Hannah-Jones argues, is restitution: A federal program to repay black Americans for the wealth that the government has taken from them.

Elsewhere: Writers for The Atlantic have previously made cases in favor of and against reparations.

THREE MORE BIG STORIES

1. The virus is surging

The U.S. recorded 36,880 coronavirus cases on Wednesday, the highest single-day total so far. While some of that reflects an increase in testing, the virus really is spreading more rapidly than it was several weeks ago. Across much of Europe and Asia, by contrast, the situation is less dire.

The rise of U.S. cases is also leading to more serious illness. In Texas, about 4,000 people with the virus are hospitalized, more than double the number at the beginning of June. Houston’s intensive-care units are now filled to 97 percent of capacity, the mayor said.

In other virus developments:

New York, New Jersey and Connecticut will require visitors from several states with high positive test rates to quarantine for two weeks. The list includes Florida, which had imposed the same rule on visiting New Yorkers three months ago.

Investors alarmed by the surging cases sent the S&P 500 falling 2.6 percent on Wednesday. The drop was particularly tough on industries vulnerable to a prolonged pandemic, such as cruise lines and airlines.

Some countries in Asia and Europe are taking novel approaches to managing new waves of infections. In South Korea, the government has advised citizens to carry two types of masks — a surgical mask for normal use, and a heavy-duty mask for crowded situations.

2. Hopes dim for policing changes

Senate Democrats blocked a Republican police overhaul bill that they said was not an adequate response to systemic racism. The House, which Democrats control, is set to pass its own legislation today, but Senate Republican leaders have said they will not take up the bill.

Senator Kamala Harris said that Democrats would “not take crumbs on the table when there is a hunger that America has for real solutions to a very real problem.” Senator Tim Scott, a Republican, said Democrats had “decided to punt this ball until the election.”

More developments:

3. Democrats are ahead in crucial Senate races

The Republicans’ Senate majority appears to be in danger, according to New York Times/Siena College polls of battleground states. To retake Senate control, Democrats would need to win five of the 11 races that currently appear competitive (as well as the vice presidency, which breaks Senate ties). The Times polled three of those races — in Arizona, Michigan and North Carolina — and the Democratic candidate is leading all, although by only three percentage points in North Carolina.

It won’t be easy for Democrats, because nine of the 11 races are in states that President Trump won in 2016. But his unpopularity has made it imaginable, as Jonathan Martin and Matt Stevens explain. In a separate story, Nate Cohn looks at Trump’s deficit in six swing states, including Florida.

Here’s what else is happening

The three white men accused of killing Ahmaud Arbery, a black man who was chased while jogging in Georgia, were indicted on murder charges.

A federal appeals court panel ordered an end to the case against Michael Flynn, President Trump’s former national security adviser, delivering a major victory to the Justice Department.

Some people are turning to conspiracy theories to explain the flood of fireworks booming over American cities. But experts say the simplest answer is probably the right one: People are bored, and fireworks are fun.

Live cockroaches, a funeral wreath and pornographic videos: The Wall Street Journal goes behind the scenes on eBay’s harassment campaign against two critics.

Lives Lived: The Soviet leader Nikita Khrushchev famously warned the West, “We will bury you!” But his son Sergei Khrushchev liked the West just fine. In fact, he moved to the United States and became a senior fellow at Brown University. “I like this country,” he once said. He has died at 84.

BACK STORY: A challenging commitment

In Powderhorn Park, a diverse Minneapolis neighborhood just blocks from where George Floyd was killed last month, many white, liberal residents are rethinking their relationship with law enforcement.

When a multiracial group of homeless people displaced by the unrest over Floyd’s death set up a tent camp in the neighborhood park, residents pledged not to involve the police. They engaged community activists, delivered meals and persuaded officials to back off an eviction notice.

But as our colleague Caitlin Dickerson reports, the limited alternatives to traditional policing have created dilemmas about where to draw the line.

One Powderhorn resident debated calling 911 after he found an unconscious man wearing a hospital bracelet. Another regretted doing so after two teenagers held him up at gunpoint. And some residents of color doubt that their white neighbors’ vows to avoid involving the police will last.

“People all over the country have been saying recently they want to change their relationship with the police,” Caitlin told us. “What’s unique about Powderhorn is that its new ideals are already being ‘tested.’ I think that’s why the story is resonating with readers, because they know they will inevitably be ‘tested’ too. I’m hearing from people today that the story is making them think about how they might react in a similar situation.”

PLAY, WATCH, EAT, PIZZA

Make perfect pizza at home

Would you like to make a deep-dish pie, with crisp edges and without mushy dough? This recipe, developed by King Arthur Flour’s test-kitchen team, achieves that. The secret? Baking it in a cast-iron pan.

Some other tricks: The tomato sauce is “smudged on top of mozzarella like sunblock,” Tejal Rao writes, which turns the cheese into a barrier against sogginess. And sprinkling more cheese to the edge of the pan adds crunch.

For the ‘Hamilton’ superfans

Good news if you haven’t been able to see “Hamilton” (or just want to rewatch it, over and over): The film version begins streaming on Disney Plus on July 3.

The movie — which is not really a movie but a live-capture of the stage production — was shot over three days in June 2016. It stars much of the original cast of the award-winning Broadway show. This is how the film came together.

Here’s a list of 16 books to watch for in July. In “Afterland,” a mother must disguise her son in a world where most of the men have been wiped out. The novel “Blacktop Wasteland,” a fast-paced noir set in Virginia, follows a mechanic who agrees to one last heist. Nonfiction titles include a memoir by the longtime “Jeopardy!” host Alex Trebek.

Diversions

Games

Here’s today’s Mini Crossword, and a clue: Channel for political junkies (5 letters).

You can find all of our puzzles here.

Thanks for spending part of your morning with The Times. See you tomorrow. — David

P.S. Ashley Southall has been named the new police bureau chief on The Times’s Metro desk. Ashley, an Alabama native, has covered the N.Y.P.D. for The Times since 2016.

You can see today’s print front page here.

Today’s episode of “The Daily” is about how voters in battleground states view the presidential candidates. On the “The Argument,” Opinion writers talk about Joe Biden’s veepstakes.

Please consider supporting Times journalism with a subscription.

Ian Prasad Philbrick and Sanam Yar contributed to The Morning. You can reach the team at [email protected].

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zhumeimv · 4 years

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Cats Producers Respond To The Backlash Over Their Film

Date: 2019-12-14 12:00:02

[aoa id=’0′][dn_wp_yt_youtube_source type=”101″ id=”GADbTgAQt0E”][/aoa]

A lack of curiosity just might kill this cat.

Two of the producers of the upcoming film adaptation of the venerable Broadway play Cats have finally surfaced to comment on the massive backlash to the trailer’s nightmarish visual aesthetic. Eric Fellner and Tim Bevan are the heads of Universal…

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inb4vaughn · 5 years

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Golf Just Adds To Quebec City Charm

Narrow cobblestone streets – lined with cozy cafés, cheese and wine shops, boutique bakeries, and so on – meander down the hillside to the quaint harbor. The ancient stone buildings, many adorned with turrets and tin roofs, date back to the 1600s. French is the only language you hear. Walking down the street, you’d swear you’d stumbled on some charming riverside city in France. Except here, the Seine is the St. Lawrence. And you’re in Quebec City, Canada.

Unquestionably, the province of Quebec, thanks to its Francophone culture, is a special place in Canada that’s unlike any other province. And Quebec City, a history-rich fortress of approximately half a million people that sits on the St. Lawrence River 150 miles northeast of Montreal, is the epicenter. It’s also home – especially if you include the charming Charlevoix region north of the city – to some spectacular golf.

But, to do this part of the world justice, sauntering along the ancient streets of Old Quebec is a mandatory experience. A fortified, stone-walled city within the city, Old Quebec dates to 1608. It’s a UNESCO World Heritage Site and exploring this city will give your Canadian holiday a distinctly European flavor. Punctuated by the towering Fairmont Le Château Frontenac – a luxurious landmark hotel, a castle, that rises above the river in the heart of this charming city – Old Quebec, which consists of the Upper Town and the Lower Town, is a treasure. And booking a stay at the Fairmont Le Château Frontenac is highly recommended. The hotel, which is said to be the most photographed hotel in the world, is within easy walking distance to the Plains of Abraham, the stone fortifications and iron cannons that ring the old city, the cobblestones of Petit-Champlain (dubbed “Canada’s prettiest pedestrian street”), and Place Royale, the beautiful public square where the city was founded.

Salaberry-de-Valleyfield, Quebec. Photo by Bernard Brault

Fittingly, golfers visiting Quebec City will also find a blend of old and new. No doubt, after exploring the city, the avid golfers in your party will want to explore some fairways. While Quebec City does not boast a high concentration of courses, you can definitely find some outstanding golf.

Golf La Tempête, for example, which is located just fifteen minutes from Old Quebec, features a beautifully shaped parkland course – with some stadium-golf overtones — that has hosted some of the best players in the world. In 2009 Fred Couples, Sergio Garcia, Ian Poulter, Geoff Ogilvy, and Mike Weir battled it out there in the Telus World Skins Game. Ogilvy was the big winner, pocketing a cool $150,000 for his nine skins. La Tempête was also the site of the 2014 PGA Tour Champions Quebec Championship, which was won by Wes Short, Jr. The club is currently nearing completion of a second championship course, which is scheduled to open in 2021. Brothers Darren and Warren Huxham have done the design work on both courses.

But golfers seeking a definite “wow” factor should make their way north of Quebec City into the charming Charlevoix region. A beautiful and pastoral destination peppered with small French villages that are nestled in the hills and tucked away in scenic bays along the St. Lawrence River, the Charlevoix is classic Quebec. Unquestionably, tourists who are smitten with the rural, history-rich, and laid-back ways of, say, Cape Breton or the New England States, will find the Charlevoix a little slice of heaven.

Fairmont Le Manoir Richelieu

And for golfers seeking the finest there is, a multi-day stay at the Fairmont Le Manoir Richelieu, which sits tight on the river in scenic La Malbaie, is the obvious choice. The grand 120-year-old resort — which hosted the most powerful leaders in the world during the 2018 G7 Summit — boasts a 27-hole course with some of the most spectacular vistas in Canadian golf. The opening hole on the St. Laurent nine, a stunning par 4 that plunges down the rocky summit where the clubhouse is situated, is, without a doubt, the ultimate Kodak moment, the “postcard” you’ll want to post on all your social media platforms.

However, as golfers will soon find out, the Golf Club Le Manoir Richelieu is not just a one-trick pony. The remaining holes on the St. Laurent nine, the undisputed champ of the three nines, continues with the dramatic down-the-mountain theme before rising (thankfully, most of the elevation is regained via your cart!) to an excellent par-5 finisher.

Unquestionably, routing a course on rocky and rugged terrain with significant elevation change poses many challenges. But here, thanks to architect Darrell Huxham’s sensible approach in his redesign work (Herbert Strong was the original architect of Le Manoir Richelieu), there are no “extreme” holes; no brutal uphill slogs that are just “grit your teeth and bear it” holes.

While St. Laurent is the most picturesque nine, the other two – Richelieu and Tadoussac – can certainly hold their own. Drivable par-4s, pretty downhill par-3s, and heroic par-5s where big hitters can unleash “the beast,” are the norm. It’s exciting, tree-lined, parkland golf with “wow” moments interspersed throughout. In fact, the “wow” moment at the Golf Club Le Manoir Richelieu comes early. Very early. The 1.5 kilometer (nearly a mile) drive up the mountain from the cart staging area at the hotel to the perched clubhouse on the summit is unlike any other “start” in golf.

Speaking of driving, the winding rural roads that curl through the Charlevoix region are a delight to explore. And, not surprisingly, given the fact the region is peppered with farms, roadside cafés, orchards, and the like, the Charlevoix “Flavour Trail” is the best way to experience them. Although you won’t be able to visit all of the tasty stops along the trail in just one visit (there are more than 50 stops), you’ll certainly have an epicurean adventure that won’t disappoint. Although the trail does incorporate restaurants, craft breweries, cideries, and brewpubs, it’s the eclectic and organic farms, the tomato wineries (seriously), and the many gastronomic surprises along the way that really make the experience worthwhile.

On your way back to Quebec City, and to cap off your visit to the Charlevoix, a quick stop at Baie-St.Paul, the artistic hub of the region, will give you one last paragraph for your postcards. Baie-St. Paul, which also sits along the tidy shore of the St. Lawrence at the mouth of the Gouffre River, is chock full of art galleries, restaurants, chocolatiers, exquisite little cheese shops, and, well, you get the idea. True, bringing a good golf swing to Quebec is somewhat important. But bringing a good appetite is essential.

The post Golf Just Adds To Quebec City Charm appeared first on Golf Tips Magazine.

from Golf Tips Magazine https://ift.tt/2KMGqEH

#Golf Tips Magazine #golf irons #golfing tips #golf irons play

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milkovski · 2 years

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the fact that ian said not one but two lines about tomatoes. like it truly wasn’t a throwaway thought: he’s been thinking about it. he’s always wanted to grow them. he wants to stop doing shady shit and just grow some tomatoes.

#yes this is a literal rehashing and reading of his lines i dont care i dont care!!!#im thinking about it!!!

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keywestlou · 6 years

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SUB-HUMAN.....ANIMALS TO BE KILLED

Monday was a disgrace. A shame.

Israel killed 59 Palestinians, eight of them children. Injured 2,700. So many that the hospitals could not handle them all. Medical personnel, medicines, dressings, etc. were insufficient.

Palestinians were protesting. On their side of the fence. The power and might of war machinery on the other side of the fence. Israel sending drones and missiles, in addition to shooting over the fence.

Ian Welsh is a noted blogger and editor. He wrote, “The simple fact is that too many Israelis now think of Palestinians as sub-human: animals to be killed if they are inconvenient.”

I recall when Israelis were abused. Those who abuse tend to become abusers. Such has happened to Israel.

Finally got my car back yesterday. The brake light problem was not a simple one involving a new fuse. Needed a brake switch. Had to come from Miami. First one that arrived the wrong one. Returned to get another. The order got lost in Miami. Finally, the correct brake switch arrived.

Lights worked. Voila!

Problem: Brakes were locked. Could not drive. Car had to remain at garage overnight.

Whatever, I was happy to have my car back yesterday. Decided I was entitled to a feast of sorts. Lunch at Sandy’s Cafe. Cuban cheese toast with tomato and a large Cuban coffee. Always delicious!

Then home. I still had to finalize, revise my podcast to be delivered last night. Tuesday Talk with Key West Lou.

Dinner before the show at Lisa’s. Robert’s birthday. Fourteen years old. Blew out the candles and sang Happy Birthday!

Robert and Ally had to leave the table immediately following the cake. They begin final exams today.

I enjoyed delivering the podcast last night. So many exciting, interesting, and disgusting events occurring worldwide. Kim Jung Un threatening to call off his summit with Trump, American Embassy opening in Jerusalem resulting in 59 dead and 2,700 injured, and American designated evangelist Pastor Robert Jeffress offering a prayer at the Embassy opening, among the topics. Jeffress especially interesting. He has repeatedly said over the years that “Jews will go to Hell.”

The best of the best however was the China/ZTE/Trump story. A quid pro quo. Three days before Trump announced we have to help China retain jobs, a Chinese bank loaned $500,000 million to an Indonesia theme park in the making. Trump’s company is part of the theme park. A Trump hotel, golf course, and condominiums.

A recent study re States and healthcare has Florida in poor standing. It ranked Florida 48th among all 50 States and the District of Columbia.

Two great white sharks traced near Florida Keys. Hilton and Savannah. Yes, they have names. They were tagged several months ago and are being followed.

Hilton a male, 12’5″, 1,300 pounds. Savannah a 8’6″ female.

They are moving north. Will travel up the Atlantic coast line. Expected to move closer to Key West the next few days.

Beware!

Enjoy your day!

SUB-HUMAN…..ANIMALS TO BE KILLED was originally published on Key West Lou

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disneydreamlights · 7 years

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I see that OC thing you reblogged probably yesterday and raise you trash just a little bit late. Nicole; 5, 8, 9, 13, 20, 22. Sky; 3, 7, 11, 13, 20. Annalee; 1, 14, 18, 20, 21, 22. and for some new material, your new OC Stella!: 5, 6, 10, 14, 18, 21, 22

My queue spit it out this morning, I accidentally queued it. XD

Nicole:

Guilty pleasures

Shitty romance novels. If they get into smutty territories she can’t read them and has to skip it, but she loves shitty romance novels, not that she’d ever tell anybody that.

Bad memories/experiences

Dragonspyre and Erosia I’d imagine that outside of SC events, Nicole has a fair amount of bad memories. She dealt with a lot of bad experiences due to the anti Faunus sentiments, mostly dealing with bullying to the point where she hid her ears.

Humiliating memories

Don’t talk to her about the first time she saw a dog. She was walking with her mom and sister and ended up cowering in fear whimpering the moment it barked. She doesn’t like acknowledging this whatsoever.

What gets them flustered

Nicole isn’t the type to get too flustered because she tries to keep her head. That being said if she’s caught cuddling with Tip, she becomes a tomato and can barely speak. Also some teasing from Peach that I can’t quite describe why does it.

What-ifs/Alternate Timelines

Aside from the BATU timeline, I personally believe if Nicole had never learned magic, she would’ve joined the White Fang. Which means she would’ve been persuaded to join it by her White Fang sister (kinda like we had planned in SA.) If we hadn’t revived Tip she likely would’ve kept trying for the rest of her life not out of love (she wouldn’t have quite realized she had feelings for him) but instead out of guilt for failing to save him, and she likely would’ve found love elsewhere. And then in a what if Tip wasn’t immortal, she probably still would’ve died before him, but that’s just my opinion.

People who’ve influenced them greatly

Her human dad, who pushed her away from White Fang influences, her sister, who showed her there is some pride in being a Faunus despite the fact that she hides it away. And then of course characters like Ian, and Tip, who helped her grow and change as a person. (I actually personally believe the two of them are the ones who encouraged her to start making an actual stand for Faunus rights.)

Sky:

Scars or painful spots

Physical scars, she has a nasty one just over her heart from the fight with Landon in most of her backstories, and the incident that starts her whole bad backstory led to a few scars lining her arms.

Their tickle spots

She won’t admit it but her entire body is one giant tickle spot. XD

Bad or petty habits

She has an awful habit of chewing gum while trying to think. Her Keyblade Master tried to break her of this, but it doesn’t really work. It’s gotten to the point where if she’s thinking and there is no gum she’ll start chewing her cheek to help her think.

What gets them flustered

Romantic interest from anybody she’s attracted to. A single flirt from somebody she likes who she could assume means nothing by it could fluster her without much effort.

What-ifs/Alternate Timelines

In universes where Landon didn’t die, Sky has a lot less anxiety, but her resolve in what she believes is right is weaker due to the fact that she’s never been forced into a position where what she believes is threatened. In AUs where Sera isn’t blinded in one eye, she takes her sister as an apprentice, and the two become an awesome Keybearing duo. If she hadn’t become a Keyblade Master, she would’ve become a hero in other ways, not a lot I’ve put thought into, but her sense of justice is too strong not to try to find a way to become a protector of the innocent.

Annalee:

Their physical weak spots

She has no power in terms of her ability to take hits. She’s strong but kinda frail at the same time, so her whole body is technically a weak point.

Ingrained habits/forces of habit

Annalee’s defense response, rather than fight for herself, is summon. It takes a lot to actually convince her to use her Keyblade, and in a regular fight she will, but her Unversed are her surprised reaction.

Things they’ll never admit

She’ll never admit how scared she was to be locked in a darkness saturated cage in SX. She’ll also never admit just how bad her anxiety is to anybody, even Emmett.

What-ifs/Alternate Timelines

In a timeline where she is born instead of just kinda forming, she’s still incredibly sheltered because her dad’s still pretty overprotective. In universes where Vanitas actually bothers to explain where she comes from, instead of Aqua being her Master, Aqua’s more her mother. I can’t think of any other big changes that could happen.

Turning points in their life

Meeting Emmett and Andrew, they were her first friends and that was a pretty huge moment for her to have because it was the start of her realizing she could be normal despite her origins.

People who’ve influenced them greatly

Her largest influences were a reformed Vanitas and Aqua, since Aqua taught her all her morals and Vanitas is kinda maybe the closest thing she has to a parent. Beyond that, Emmett is probably the closest thing she has to an influence...

She has one good influence?

Stella:

Guilty pleasures

Stella enjoys taking time out of her day to find a quiet place to watch kids shows. She doesn’t really have any knowledge of them so she just enjoys watching stuff like Teletubbies and Sesame Street even though she understands she’s too old for them.

Their vices (physical or emotional)

Emotional vices come from her love of manipulation. She’s gifted at coming up with a plan and executing it without morals due to the lack of morals in her programming, thus meaning she experiences no regrets in any of her actions leading to her believing she has the best interests without thinking of any consequences to others as bad, just as sacrifices to the greater goal.

Fears/phobias

Losing who she is, being reprogrammed, forgetting any memories she has, and losing anybody she grows to care about top her list.

Ingrained habits/forces of habit

In addition to running regular maintenance on her body, she has a force of habit that she doesn’t like not moving. She likes to be in constant motion, sitting still for too long makes her uncomfortable.

Things they’ll never admit

Stella will never admit her fears without prompting in some way. She also tends to try to avoid bringing up the whole android thing to begin with.

Turning points in their life

Running away from her creators, learning of her own emotional capabilities, and defining her own code that she follows. Also, making her first friend is one, but that’s a part of her backstory I don’t wanna spoil how it goes. (Answer without saying too much: Not well.)

People who’ve influenced them greatly

That first friend I mentioned, they’re part of Stella’s biggest influences...too bad they don’t have a name yet. I need to get working on naming ocs in backstories as opposed to just touching on how they impact them.

#Heather RPs #neko-adachi #Heather Answers

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