hii hiii is it alright if I request something with kotoko and haruka?(platonic ofc) their character foils drive me insane with all the weak stuff authngghn icant be normal about them
Oooh thank you so much for the request! I realized that these two actually have one of the smallest windows to talk easily, given Haruka's nervousness and Kotoko's T2 changes. They have such interesting approaches to strength/weakness, and I hope I could capture it a bit here! This takes place immediately following Kotoko's bday timeline after Harrow's release:
“I’ll accept those birthday wishes…” Kotoko gave him a wave over her shoulder as she returned to making her bed.
She shook her head in awe. It was rather impressive how quickly the boy had changed after his verdict. The others had more subtle differences, but he was someone entirely new. She could rest easy, at least, knowing that her verdict wouldn’t change her much. For as long as she could remember, she’d been like this. She knew where she stood, and neither guilty nor innocent verdict would affect that. This verdict was really only an indicator on whether the warden could be trusted or not.
Her body tensed up when she turned back around, startled by Haruka lingering silently in the doorway. She decided against chastising him for scaring her half to death. Still, she couldn’t keep the bite from her voice as she asked, “did you need something else?”
“Ah… I just…” He twisted his hands together. “I had a question.”
He fell silent, but Kotoko could tell he was chewing on his next words. She waited.
“H-how do you do it? All the time? You’re older and stronger and braver and I-I just don’t know how.”
“Give yourself some credit. I’m not that much older, or stronger. I only have, what -- two, three years on you? And you did very well in the arm wrestling tournament the other day.”
She wasn’t being patronizing. For someone so sheltered, Haruka could do some damage. He stood a few inches taller than her. The others had taken the arm wrestling as a little game, but Kotoko had used the event to measure up her fellow prisoners. After his close match with Mikoto, she had made a mental note to take him seriously.
“No…” his expression twitched, getting frustrated with the misunderstanding. “Not muscles. I mean… you don’t have someone like Muu. You don’t need someone next to you all the time. But you still talk with everyone… and it looks easy. All the time. You always know what to say, and what to do. You never look scared. You never cry.”
Kotoko’s smile softened. She wasn’t the prideful type, but his words gave her a wave of accomplishment. She certainly was scared. She did cry. But she wasn’t about to show a single crack in her resolve in front of anyone here. Haruka had given her the greatest of compliments by confirming her success.
“Ah, you mean strength of spirit. Well, that doesn’t just appear out of nowhere. It comes with my purpose, with my virtues.”
“Virtues…?”
“I see the injustice around me, and want to protect the innocent. When I see how awful the world can be, when I see the monsters that are hurting those who are weak, I can’t help myself.” She clenched her fist. “The power to do so just comes to me.”
“Oh…” Haruka looked down at his palms.
Her heart sank, realizing he didn’t quite understand. It was a shame that not all of humanity could be as righteous as her. That heroic drive had always come so naturally to her; she wasn’t sure she could put it into words to explain to others.
Haruka’s open hands were trembling. “Um. Is there any other way?”
“Hm?”
“All my life… I only cause pain to everyone.” His worry gradually turned to desperation.” I hurt everyone who gets close to me. Especially things that are small and weak. My whole life, I’ve been nothing but a… a curse. So… is there another way? Please. I want to be better. I want to be strong! I want to be like you! Tell me!”
He stepped forward, pleading. Kotoko stepped back.
His blue eyes widened at her sudden shift into defense. “Ah! I. I’m sorry. I’m-I’m sorry. It’s your birthday. You should be… Have a g-good day.”
“Wait.” Kotoko stopped him before he could flee. She was aware of the massive gap between them, the vastly different backgrounds they came from. Still, she offered the same advice that had helped her in her toughest of days.
“Don’t worry so much about others’ strength. The quickest way to burn yourself out is getting overwhelmed with the power that’s all around you. Once you start putting all your focus toward honing your own skills and strengths, you’ll realize how much you’re truly capable of. You don’t need anyone else. You’ll realize that you are enough.”
“I… am enough…?”
She placed a hand firmly on his shoulder.
“So, no need to get all worked up now, okay?”
“O-okay. I’ll do my best.” He stiffened, trying to appear worthy of her words.
She let out a bitter laugh. “I told the others not to do anything for my birthday, but I don’t think they paid me any mind.” Kotoko still couldn’t fathom how they were so friendly with each other given the situation. “Let’s go see if there’s some cake or something.”
26 notes
·
View notes
Eunyung and stealing
HJ | Parallels | Details
Eunyung had never stolen anything before the first time he was accused of it, after running away the first time. He didn't steal those headphones, yet still got beaten up for it.
His dad didn't even let him explain himself before starting to hit him. Only afterwards did EY get the chance to say he didn't do it so his dad could hear, who ofc didn't care enough to believe him. Instead of trusting him or at least listening to him, he asked EY to apologize for sth he didn’t do and just get the whole thing over with.
^^ Here, EY was caught off guard by his dad's "gentleness" (<- not hitting him) when he leaned down and whispered to him (hence the small blush above). To me, it seems like he had a sliver of hope that his dad would be nice to him for once. But the gentleness vanished quickly as his dad then proceeded shaming and guilt-tripping him into apologizing (hence the blush below).
That tactic didn't work bc EY knows how unfair the thing he's being asked to do is. He knows he's innocent bc he really didn't steal anything. When he refused and insisted he really didn't do it, his dad pulled the "I'm so disappointed in you. You never change"-card.
Now, that tactic worked. In the end he just gave in and apologized as told in order to avoid more conflict and finally get out of that uncomfortable situation -> Something like resignation
(^^ This also ties into why EY was so upset with HJ's words during Thanksgiving's arc -> he hates the idea that he can't change and will stay like this forever. That's also a reason why he apologized despite being innocent -> EY wanted to prove his dad wrong: He can change. He can be something other than a disappointment not worth anyone's time.)
The guy who actually did it got away with it and EY got made fun of for being stupid enough to take the blame. He sought out the guy to take revenge bc he knew there'd be no other type of justice for someone like him.
His dad’s actions that day (wrongly accusing and forcing EY to take the blame) is what pushed him to try stealing -> If he was going to suffer the consequences anyway, he should at least benefit from it somehow by actually stealing sth and profit from whatever he stole. That way the accusation would at least be valid.
That day, EY learned to seek justice by himself because no one else would; and he learned to steal. He started stealing in his first year of middle school, one month after running away from home for the first time. All because of his dad. EY never had a father, he had the opposite of a role model -> he knew what he did not want to be.
20 notes
·
View notes