yo enzo from stranger things s4 is SOOOOO FIIINE DAWG

right ok. I'm so exhausted I think it's making my anger a lot more composed but I'm ummmm actually really angry! haha! text message guy was being a fucking dickhead all night with his stupid dickhead friend who keeps egging him on and sharing stupid unfunny offensive jokes where the joke is just like fucking. saying the word aids or pedophile or whatever. proper juvenile shit genuinely I don't Get what is funny. well they were drunk so that's the answer I guess. and then they doing the guy thing and the drunk thing of being overly friendly in a way that's making fun of you being kind of rude and being fucking. attention seeking. and loud and interrupting me and my friend (who was a fucking godsend except for a moment we'll get to in a second 😐) who were just being chill and watching the live music. and it goes on so much longer than anticipated I'm tired I only basically went because I wanted to show my friends they should still invite me to stuff LOL and because a potential new friend was gonna be there too. but that's not relevant except to let you know my I was already not in a bitchy mood by any means I was just sort of ready to Go. and I left my stuff in my (chill) friend's room on campus so we all (chill friend, text message guy, his twat friend) went there. and they would not stop with these stupid jokes over and over and I was like " 😐 you literally have three jokes" and in response the twat friend said "no like I was saying I'm not even drunk I'm sober rn" just to give you a sense of what I was dealing with in terms of conversation. and I was over it I wanted to fucking leave but they kept going even in the hallway while my chill friend went to the loo. I don't remember specifically what set it off but I had already stopped acknowledging them/humouring them at all I just ignored them then it got bad enough I walked off. and those stupid cunts FOLLOWED ME . and were like teeee tee we're sorryyy 😥😥😥 in that stupid childish drunk way and I was like I'm fine it's fine I just need to go. and they could tell I was mad at this point. and fucking text message guy. has the AUDACITY. to go "aw, come on tee, you know we love you"

😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😑😑😑

and I, admittedly in a manner that made me feel for a brief moment like a Bad Bitch, replied without missing a beat: "yeah I know- you fucking texted it to me, remember?"

and then it was out there!!!!! I said it finally I was just so angry and frankly I did say it to try and hurt him and embarrass him I'll say it lol because I felt fucking embarrassed that whole night and with the whole stupid ordeal anyway. and there was SUCH a relief. like ok I said it it's out. I said it EXPLICITLY. There was no way to misinterpret what I just said to him even with him drunk like that. I did the hard thing I did the confrontation now I should get the reward of finding out what the fuck is his problem. and he delays for a moment, still with mothballs in his skull, and then goes "oh" but like not an "oh shit" oh more like he was just remembering it and he LAUGHS and goes "...and you sent the question mark...?" and EYE say "and you never fucking explained what that was, yeah" and I was fucking fuming I was heated I wasn't yelling but like. I was mad. lowkey wish chill friend was there I think their reaction would have been crazy. sorry I luv to narrativise my stupid life! anyway. and he's just like oh yeah. and then laughs. and goes. 😐😐😐😐😐. he goes, "well I guess you'll never know." all smug. and I wanted to break his neck. like it's not even that there's any truth to it you fucking gave it away you admitted it was a message to me you admitted you saw the text back you admitted that these were all deliberate choices! If not now than in a second when you keep fucking talking. but the way he said it like it was so funny keeping that from me. when I was so stressed about it and about protecting HIS feelings. fuck him oh my god.

but yeah so he does that and then the twat who caught only half of it and is using negative percents of his brain is like wait what message! what message! and text guy laughs and just goes haha just a message I sent to show my appreciation for tee! and the twat is like you're such a sap man. or something to that effect. I'm literally doing deep breathing rn typing this fucking hell. and of course coming out of the loo chill friend hears ONLY this small bit and I don't know now if they understood at any point that I was no longer kind of tired and annoyed by what I will extremely generously call their "drunk antics," but instead was seriously pissed. but they go, at this point thinking everything is still chill and a laugh, "what, are you two an item now?" and I just felt so small and miserable. and I just muttered "ask fucking [guy's name]" and kept moving I wanted to scream. because still he could not just be fucking straight with me and was messing me about for no reason at all. and by the time our paths diverged I just sort of loudly went BYE! without any sentimentality or individual goodbyes as they went to a bar and I went on my way home. and then I immediately called my friend and yelled about this so loudly and viciously I'm sure the entirety of the fucking city heard about it. I literally was like "hey it's late I hope you're not busy or trying to sleep" and as soon as she said she could talk I went. I hope the guy who sent me that fucking text kills himself. and I mean it.

Hi shay.!! How r u doing? What are your fave or maybe even self indulgent hcs of bkg in general or in a relationship or maybe both hehe.. coz I really like to know your thoughts n insights. ur one my fav bkg writers out there💕 n really love how u portray him in ur fics 👌. (btw I'm the anon who sent pov asks for fmn and dw take ur time. Just wanted to let you know that fmn is my absolute fav fic of urs I keep coming back to it , and I'm patiently waiting for the epilogue n sequel later😌)

hello nonnie my love!! i'm doing well thank u for asking<3 u are too sweet i am patting ur head so tenderly rn<3 i've got an exam i need to study for but shh itll be fine im fine :') im hoping to be able to write as i procrastinate on studying LOLLL

hmmmmmm i had to do some sitting around and thinking for these. i think there's a mix of hc and canon stuff but these r generally my bkg thoughts LOL sorry it got out of hand sdfhksdf:

he's a clean freak - can't stand the sight of hair around his apartment, even his own LOL

"DIE STAINS!!" as he cleans dishes

he's one of those people who can wake up the instant his alarm goes off and can just get up. no snoozing whatsoever (tho he does like his sleep and WILL be grumpy. don't talk to him at least for half an hour)

also one of those people who can just sit down and get his work done, no procrastinating

lightweight as FUCK one drink and he's gone

on that note, he's a mix of a sleepy + clingy drunk.

and i say "clingy" as in he will hover around you and be more blatant with staring right at you + holding onto you bc he's got no digression when he's drunk lol. all those thoughts he represses when hes sober just bubble to the surface

fr wears his heart on his sleeve.

OK THIS ISNT A HC THIS IS CANON BUT THE FACT THAT U SEE ALL HIS EMOTIONS THRU HIS EYES AND HE HATES THE FACT THAT HE CRIES A LOT (maybe even more than deku) BUT CANT HELP IT!!!! and he slowly learns that its okay to cry, esp in front of people, and yeah<33

budgets his finances p well - he's got an excel spreadsheet and everything

yeah his parents r well off but he's lowkey a little stingy when it comes to money LOLLL tho he does buy top quality shit he doesnt buy unnecessary things at least until he meets u

WILL basically sugar baby u, buying u stuff he thinks/knows you'll like ESPECIALLY if he's crushing.

he'll b all gruff abt it tho, trying hard to play it off as just something he does when it's obvious he doesnt do it for any of his other friends LMAO its so obvious hes in love ur honor, u can see it in his eyes tee hee

doesnt realize hes crushing at first tho.

i feel like there has to be some sort of catalyst for him to realize his feelings/act on them LOL. doesnt have to be anything big

it just punches him in the face one day when hes like "wait- why the fuck am i doing this?!"

he hopes that by getting u things constantly and wanting to spend basically all his free time w u tht you'll catch on to the fact tht he likes u lmfaoo he's bad w words ok!!

doesn't think he deserves to be in love, which is why it makes it hard for him to confess/ask u out. or at least why he takes a long time to do so

he doesnt give his heart to just ANYONE, if hes asking u out its w the intention that one day he'll marry u

DEMI BKG.

at first he only knew how to do eyeshadow/eyeliner for his mask but he learned how to do like, contour/foundation after he met u bc he likes doing ur makeup

also likes braiding ur hair/playing with it and having his own played with in return

wipes his hands on his pants before he touches u sometimes

this is obvious but he is a very healthy eater and constantly conscious of how he treats himself. never catch him eating junk food or smoking or anything. if he does treat himself to take out he goes n exercises it off after

makes his own recipes for meals sometimes.

listens to a lot of punk rock music w heavy drums!! especially when he's exercising. if u catch him at the right time u might see him listening to softer music when he's feelin comfy

on that note he's got a lot of organizational/specific playlists he's made on spotify. all private tho and he doesnt bother putting covers on em

video game nerd!! he 360 no scoped denki not once, but three times in one game.

knows a lot about engineering ngl. little nerd has books on mechanics, dynamics, physics, etc.

woke king. he made sure he had a well-rounded education

flexible af!! he can do splits!!

loves puns (i think this is canon??) tho will pretend he doesnt

SO FUCKING EASY to deez nutz or upbaby him

also easy to condition him with kisses. NEEDS his gm nd gn kisses or he'll be grumpy the rest of the day

kiss drunk sap

LMaO the fact that he pretends hes a delinquent but is actually such a stickler for the rules/wont talk back

on that note he unfortunately wont pick u over the world

but he DOES put u before himself and will 100% die for u

thinks hes selfish but he's actually not. he makes sure u're well taken care of in terms of comfort, food, stress, etc.

gets along better with old people than ppl his own age LOLLL

hard of hearing in his 20s/30s!! knows jsl!! also fluent in english.

IDK WHERE THIS CAME FROM BUT HIM BEING A SECRET FAN OF ROMANCE NOVELS????!!!! that shit is so fucking cute to me who came up with it?!

on that note he doesn't really like horror movies but pretends he isn't a wuss LOLL. will nonchalantly hold ur hand during it and say its for your own sake, not his. i can imagine him getting spooked and flinching n coughing and pretending nothing happened haha

emo boy likes his beanies

cares perhaps a bit too much abt what other people think of him

WILL splay himself all over the bed when he sleeps, but he does also kinda wrap himself around u and can stay like that for the entire night. he flops in btwn

has nightmares n will wake up in the middle of the night & will simply listen to ur breathing until he falls back asleep

sometimes thinks u arent real - how did he manage to get someone who loves him for who he is, thorns and all?

ANYWAYS yeah KHSDFKSF those r all over the place but theyre what i can think of for now haha.

also!! yes thank u for reading fmn! it really means a lot that u like it so much!! i literally cant express it, fmn is my BABY!!!!!! i feel like a proud parent LMAOO idk if u saw but i did post tht i would get to your POV asks eventually!!! (ive already deleted the post sdfhfkd) hopefully i can work on some stuff tonight!!

Hey so I feel like I haven't rlly directly interacted w u in a while, so how r u? everything alright, any big things coming up, etc?

Also, who r ur blorblos, scrimblos and skrunklies? (yes they're different lol)

Hello!!! It's alright, I haven't reached out either much. I'm doing ok right now, anxiety and mood swings make my mental health silly sometimes though.

And I'm not sure what the differences between blorblos, scrimblos, and skrunklies are, but my main comfort characters right now thst I think about the most are are

Goofy gang (Medic, Mirror Man, Jack Walten, Spamton, Tony the clock, and Drunk Guy)

The tf2 mercs

The whole tlt cast

Jack Stauber's Opal cast

My ocs (that be fandom or Josef and Sauer)

Goosebumps dummies

Lewis Pepper

Cubone, Sobble, and Banette

Most of twf cast, tho mostly Rosemary, Felix, Susan, Brian, and Sophie

The fun gang in Deltarune

Jevil

Spinel and Peridot

Atla cast, mainly Toph and Uncle Iroh tho

Toy, og, and withered aminatronics in fnaf

Tho characters I'm brainrotting over atm are

Goofy gang characters, especially Drunk Guy and Jack Walten rn

Ddlc girls (tho I actually dislike the series for how insensitive it handles self harm)

Cain Sephtis (oc)

My ocs for my series inspired by why did I say okie dokie by Stupendium, tho mostly for Lilin (I don't think I've shared art of her)

Tesla in tlt

Then characters I kin for are

Uncle Iroh

Spinel

Fred Jones (mystery inc)

Zero_One

Spamton

My oc Sauer

Sobble

My tf2 oc Nurse

Lowkey Drunk Guy but like REALLY lowkey

Sorry if this isn't what you wanted but I hope yoy like my rambles anyway ^^

Hey Erric (is that his name?) why are you a spy for Tanner and Anna?

Erric: Ah well I used to work for Lucifer. He taught us all that Tanner was the enemy. That they brainwashed demons to fight for them and they only wanted to control and use us to take over hell. We believed him cause why wouldn't we? What reason did we have to doubt him. He treated us like slaves. Puppets. Nothing more than a pawn to do his bidding. But he convinced us that they were worse. Well I met Anna and Tanner after they captured me. That's when I was tortured. Lucifer....prepared is for torture. He thought if we had felt it all we wouldn't give up his info. He prepared us for all kinds of pain. We didn't expect the kind of torture they used. When I found out they never wanted to hurt anyone...I guess my mindset changed. I...I stayed for awhile to see what they're life was like. They were nice. They treated they're subjects like friends. Like PEOPLE. How couldnI continue to fight for Lucifer when they could be so kind. When they wanted us to just live! I couldn't serve him any more. I escaped and joined their cause. I've never regretted my decision.

asks :)

once again, i’m terrible at answering things :)

First off, your newest Kuroo story WRECKED ME. OMMMMMG LIKE IT'S SOOO FUCKING GOOD. You are one of the most incredible writers ever, like professional style writing. These should be books and you should get paid for it, honestly. Your skill is totally unmatched, my friend. I just adore everything you write. I had two questions thou about the story, just because I am totally obsessed by it- so has Kuroo been obsessed with her since he saw her, I'm like curious how his obsession started 

like is it because she's young and he's interested? Cuz I totally got the vibes at the party that he was showing her off like she was his girlfriend and he seems like he has been wanting her for awhile. I was just curious about how it started cuz god I'm a simp for yandere kuroo- boss man Kuroo would make me weakkkkk. My second question is so is he like obsessively in love with her or is it like just a this hot piece of ass is mine to fuck kinda thing? Like does he want a relationship?

anyways, I love you and I love your writing. Everything you write is legit perfection! Thank you for all your beautiful stories you share with us! - Kai

first of all, whomst gave you the right to be so damn sweet???!?! dsgsjkl thank you, bby!

so, like with all my fics i kind of have a ‘read into it how you want’ thing going for it. whether or not kuroo actually has ‘romantic’ (i use that word loosely) feelings for the reader or whether he just enjoys fucking her because he’s in a position of power and she’s easily manipulated is left a little up to your interpretation and how you’d prefer to imagine it. however, having said that there are little hints throughout the fic that imply that there’s a little more depth to kuroo’s feelings. you’re not wrong with the whole ‘showing her off’ vibe at the party, and there’s mentions of confessions that kuroo gives while he’s fucking the reader - also the title of the fic, invidia, means envy in latin. so take that how you will 🤷‍♀️

and as far as how it all began, i like to think that it was kind of a slow build. again it’s implied that kuroo has met the reader (however briefly) a few times before - at games as nekoma’s manager, when she initially was introduced as his girlfriend and she has stayed over at their place in the past. it wasn’t so much a singular moment, but kuroo’s definitely been paying more attention to her than she realises. 

WHAT WHAT WHAT???? RHI UHMMM WAS KUROO IN LOVE WITH THE READER???? 👀👀👀👀 HOLY SHIT. I'm honestly mind blown rn like I have a lot of questions like did Shin know? Was he also into it? Omg the idea of Father and Son sharing reader...

(also I def did not hope that Bokuto was also there cuz that would have be fun....oppsss)🙊

hehehe

no, shin didn’t know but oh can you imagine the betrayal if he did? if he willingly set up the reader to be fucked by his dad 👀god damn

adsfgdhjfkfl there was a moment i genuinely considered having something more happen at the christmas party where bo would stumble across and one thing would lead to another.... but i decided not to go that route. this one needed to be solo kuroo haha

Rhi, what can I say, amazing as always!

ahhh thank you sm, bby!

Hi i absolutely love the kuroo fic at first no one would actually notice he was into and then story actually rises nicely however i would like to ask like what happens later im sorry im a little burnt out from my mountains of assignments that i cant think of a possible aftermath since the story had an open ending but yeah what happens later after the whole scene does y/n stay there for the 7 days and get r*ped again or she goes home early and like what happens to kuroo and shinsuke im sorry for annoying you with questions its fully up to you whether u would like to answer or not :-)

aw, thank you! I hope your assignments and stuff are all done? And pls bby, you’re not annoying me at all 💕💕💕

Honestly again, it’s kind of left up to what you like to think would happen, but personally I think that the reader stays, because there’s no easy way to get out of that situation without raising suspicion - which means that she then has to spend the next week trying unwittingly playing cat and mouse with Kuroo who’s gonna use every damn opportunity he has to push your boundaries 👀

Duuuuude invidia fucked me up! Like fuck, lol! The build up was so spectacular! It makes me wonder two things: how did kuroo’s obsession start, and what would shin have done if he caught them (and why do I feel like he’d join in... I guess it runs in the family lol).

I loved it sooooo much and im also so creeped out lol. Can’t trust other people’s dads. Everything about it was perfect!

glad you liked it, bby!!

shin’s a good boy and he genuinely loves the reader, but i think if he did stumble across the two of them he’d just shut down and walk away. it’d be the biggest betrayal in his eyes - it wouldn’t matter if you were drunk or he was, who came onto who - the two most important people in his life going behind his back would just break him :( and i think he probably wouldn’t give either of them a chance to explain

but if we’re talking degenerate shin... 👀👉👈

imagine if invidia! reader gets pregnant and Shin thinks it’s his, but its actually his dad’s 🤭

oooh kuroo would be such a smug little shit - he’d get extra touchy feely with the reader, drop ‘casual’ hints, basically doing everything outside of straight up admitting it to him, just to see how far he can push until shin starts to doubt whether he’s actually the father - when it’s just the two of you though... i think he’d be a little softer - but equally as possessive - you’re his, and so’s the kid growing inside of you

Kuroo: son do you know what a cuck is? Shinnosuke: no? Kuroo: wOULD YOU LIKE TO FIND OUT - @south-korea-cakes

dagshjskl i snorted when i read this but you’re not wrong lmao

hi rhi! i have a question about Lion’s Den! did oikawa purposely set the reader up to witness his true nature? or was it chance that she saw him kill?

no - i think he’d rather have kept you in the dark a little longer and tried to let things develop ‘organically’ but he’s not upset that you did find out the truth - gives him an excuse to move things along and take what he wants 👀

hey rhi:) soo my boyfriend of two years just broke up with me and so far a major comfort has just been rereading your stories. something about feeling desired, ya know? anyway, thanks for making me feel a little better <3 - @theofficialhufflepuff

aw i’m sorry to hear that :( i’m glad my fics can help make you feel a lil better - sending love bby! 💕

omg i adore everything in the soulmate series hello !! would any of the soulmate pairings ever end up feeling lowkey competitive w/ the other?? like all of them seem to mutually respect the other but would there ever come a point where smth pushes them into trying to outdo ur other soulmate when it comes to ur affection?

also have i mentioned how much i love ur writing bc i love ur writing

hmmm, not so much with oikawa & iwa or ushijima and tendou because i think they have pretty rock solid relationships with each other prior to the reader coming along - if they did it would only be minor stuff

the twins on the other hand - good fucking luck with them because they’ll turn everything into a competition. the moment one twin thinks you’re favouring the other too much expect to get dragged across the room and forced to spend ‘quality time’ with the other. it’s all very petty and exhausting and there is no possible chance for you to win. but thank you sweetheart!!

tonight im thinking about The Final Girl! boys forcing you to share a bed with them for the first time. With Kuroo’s face buried in the crook of your neck, one big hand palming your breast for good measure, Bo holding onto your waist, and Kaashi’s legs tangled with yours. its suffocating, really😪😓

asdgdhjdkdl suffocating? yes. now where do i sign up?? 🥺

you are so talented in writing it's crazy!! just the way you articulate things is ugh *chef's kiss*. i hope you are doing well and not receiving hate 🥺 ily pls

ahhh thank you so much, messages like these always make me so happy! ily bby! 💕

more karasuno first years soon? 👀

who’s to say?? i don’t have any full fics planned but maybe some concepts and thirsts??

if you make a yandere msby fic i’ll literally lose it i love your writing

👀i am considering it

okay so sorry if this is too much lmfao but i haven't eaten in like 48 hours? like no calories nothing at all. i took two doses of vyvanze in that time that were pretty high so the last two days have just breezed by. this morning i wake up (i've been fasting like 48 hours at this point) and i'm starting my prescription for my own adhd now. so i took that for the first time on a completely empty stomach and still lowkey riding the high from the vyvanze. i'm at work but i literally feel like half drunk half high but most importantly not hungry and honestly i could get used to this feeling lol but anyway i love each wnd every one of u (some more than others hehe *winks at the bbs in my dms* u know who u r) but i hope u all are doing well and getting excited for all the holidays! i'm going to a pumpkin patch tmrw w my best friend and my bf and honestly life is just good rn. that's all <3

LITTLE DO YOU KNOW PT. 5

"𝘞𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦, 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘵 𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳, 𝘴𝘢𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨. 𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘪𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘮𝘦𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨." ━ 𝐉𝐞𝐧𝐧𝐲 𝐇𝐚𝐧, 𝐈𝐭'𝐬 𝐍𝐨𝐭 𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐫 𝐖𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐘𝐨𝐮

gif credit (x)

series masterlist

requested: yes | no

warnings: nada.

word count: 5,562 [ wow i write too much lmao ]

authors note: ok i’m so so sorry this took so long to get out, but it’s finally here! this series was such a bad idea bc writing it is lowkey making me fall in love with tyler lmao. i’m so sorry (again) that this is so late [i think like 2 weeks? a week? idk but still] and i swear i’ll update regularly now lol. i hit some writers block writing this, so i hope it doesn’t suck too much. i hope you all enjoy and as always, i love hearing from you guys– your theories of how the series as a whole will end, your likes/dislikes, anything! tysm for taking the time out of your day to read, ily and i hope your thanksgiving table is full of your favorite foods and surrounded by your favorite people!!

You weren't sure what exactly woke you up first– the slight throbbing of your head or whatever the hell was touching your face. It couldn't have been 10 AM yet, Kennedy knew the rule you guys had when it came to the morning after a big party, so there was no way she was trying to wake you up now. You groaned and rolled over, tugging your blanket with you and forcing yourself to fall back asleep. Suddenly, a huff of air followed by something wet, pressed against your ear. "Kennedy cut it off" you mumbled, waving your hand in that general direction...only to touch something soft and furry. You opened an eye and looked over to see Cash sitting next to you wiggling his but against the blanket as if he was waiting for you to greet him. "Hi boy," you yawned, rolling over onto your back and patting your stomach. He immediately put two paws onto your chest and started to lick your face. "Okay, hi, I can't breathe,"

You laid there, trying your best to focus on your surroundings as you rubbed the top of Cash's head, which was now rested on your chest. In the first few moments, you were wondering why the hell one of Tyler's dogs was in your dorm room. When your eyes took in the fancy, less dorm-esque furniture around you, you realized that you were at Tyler's. Okay, so maybe Tyler was being a good friend and teammate and Big Rig called him for a ride. Everyone must have been so obnoxiously drunk that Tyler decided that instead of walking the three of you to the dorm, he'd just have you crash at his place. 

That thought seemed extremely logical until you remembered that sometime before everything started to blur, Big Rig and Kennedy had left the party. Okay, so maybe it was just you that stayed here, which made perfect sense. The boys were set to leave this morning to fly to Winnipeg for the beginning of their road series and you always took care of the dogs, so maybe Tyler just brought you here early. Tapping Cash on the nose, he stood up and jumped off of the bed you were lying in. You took a deep breath and yawned before throwing off your blankets and sitting up. He greeted you on the other side of the bed before walking into the bathroom.

Wait...Tyler's guest room didn't have an attached bathroom.

Slowly, you looked around the room again to notice that there were little things left out, throughout the room. Receipts, clothes hamper, suits still in their dry cleaning plastic. Holy shit. "Oh no," You stood up quickly, almost making yourself dizzy as it settled into your brain– you were in Tyler's room. "No, no, no no, I didn't," you rushed into the bathroom after Cash and came to a stop in front of the mirror. You were wearing a Dallas Stars dri-fit that sported Tyler's 91 on both sleeves and when you turned slightly, you could even see his last name labeled across the back. "Please tell me that I didn't."

You closed your eyes and grabbed onto the bottom of the shirt, lifting it slightly before peeking through one of your eyes to see that you still had on your black spandex from the night before. "Oh thank God," you sighed, leaning forward and resting your hands onto the marble bathroom counter. You looked back up at your reflection to see that your face was...surprisingly clean. You must have remembered to take your make-up off the night before. You could hear beeping coming in from the bedroom and you walked back to the bed to see your phone screen lit up with messages.

Picking up your phone, you unlock it and click on Kennedy's message to see a mix of some from the last night and just now.

"HE DID WHAT?! OH, WE'RE SO SPIKING HIS CHIPOTLE BOWL THE NXT TIME WE SEE HIM."

"OH SHIT GET IT GURLLLLL"

"okay damn. 12 pm and you haven't texted me back or open any of my snaps. did the dick appointment with tyler kill you?"

"dick too bomb?"

"okay but seriously are you alive rn or should i send 911?"

Your eyes widened with every message you read. It wasn't possible, you were still dressed...granted, in Tyler's shirt and your bandeau was gone...oh no. You scrolled up to the last message you had sent her to see that it was a picture of Tyler's back as he was walking towards his closet, taken from an angle that would only be possible if you were sitting on the edge of his bed. It wouldn't be that bad if you hadn't sent a text along with it that said– "dick me down daddyyyyyy 🥰🤪🤤

You felt a chill travel down your spine as your sent Kennedy and thumbs up and a 'we'll talk later' message before locking your phone again. Okay, so maybe it was possible, that you and Tyler did have sex last night. But, and you felt extremely bad for thinking this, but...wouldn't you at least remember it? You almost considered asking him that very same question but decided that maybe a more, subtle and less offensive approach would be best. You sighed, rubbing your eyes as you walked out of the bedroom, already planning the awkward conversation you'd have with Tyler. But at least you wouldn't have to have it until he came back from his road trip.

As you walked down the stairs, the closest you got to the bottom of the steps you could hear some music coming from the kitchen. You slowed down, wary of who else could be in the house as you quietly walked through the living room and peeked around the wall to see Tyler. You ducked back behind the wall, shaking your head to yourself before checking your phone again. It was almost 12:30 and instead of being on a plane...Tyler was dancing in front of a stove, shirtless. 

You peeked back around the corner as the song señorita played from the small Bluetooth speaker on the counter. He was completely oblivious to your presence, which only allowed you to admire his bareback. Pale as he may be, you couldn't help but almost drool at the definition in his back muscles as he worked whatever he was cooking on the stove. Your eyes traveled down to the band of his sweatpants and you titled your head to the side. He was right, he had some serious buns of steel.

"Okay no, get a grip Y/N. Stop being a creep," you mumble to yourself, taking a deep breath before stepping out from around the corner. You walked over to a stool at the counter and sat on it, resting your elbows on to the counter as Tyler was still oblivious to your presence. "Nice moves Seguin."

He whipped around so fast that he almost slipped on the kitchen floor. His eyes widened until he saw it was you and then he relaxed, though he was still holding up his spatula as if he was going to use it as a weapon. "Holy shit," he exhaled, pointing the spatula at you. "Warn a guy next time, eh? You're just in time by the way."

He grabbed a plate from his left and turned back around. "For what? You to hit me to death with," you gasped, bringing a hand over your heart, "a kitchen utensil?"

"Ha Ha," he said sarcastically as he turned back around and placed the plate down in front of you. "Your toast might be a bit cold considering you slept like a dead person, but the omelette is warm, so bon apétite."

You picked up the fork he placed down next to the plate and looked at the food as he went back to the stove. Not only could you get used to the view, but you could also get used to Tyler cooking meals for you. He turned off the stove and turned back, placing his plate on the counter and staying across from you. "Sorry, I don't know what you eat, so I just made what your brother normally eats. I'm assuming you have similar tastes."

"That we do," you smiled, picking up a piece of toast and nodding at him. "Thanks, this is great."

"Cool, enjoy," he just nodded and went back to focusing on his breakfast.

An awkward silence settled between the two of you, the only sounds being your forks clanking against your plates or the dogs' paws moving across the floor. He didn't bother to look back up at you since you thanked him for the breakfast and you couldn't help but wonder why he's not the least bit bothered that you woke up in his bed. You grew up with two manly, hocking playing brothers, so based on experience, you knew that the odds of him hiding his panic was probably slim. Unless that was the reason why he wasn't even bothered to start a conversation with you? What if you did have sex with him last night and him making breakfast for you was his way as trying to brush it off? Cause that's a thing, right? Hookups get breakfast the next morning? God, you felt so out of tune with hook-up culture these days since you'd been chained down in a shitty, toxic relationship for the last few years.

You cleared your throat, pushing around a cut off part of your omelette. "So um..."

He looked up at you, holding his fork in front of his mouth. "Yeah?" He brought the fork into his mouth, chewing the bite of his omelette he had cut off.

"Didwehavesexlastnight?"

His eyes went wide as he coughed, nearly choking on his food. He hit his chest a few times before turning away from you and taking a long sip of water and looking back at you, still panicked. "I'm sorry, what?"

You took a deep breath, letting the fork rest on your plate. "Did we have sex...last night?"

He downed some more water, shaking his head. "No, we didn't." Before you could get your follow up question to leave your lips, he cut you off. "I slept in the theatre."

"Oh," was all you could say as you looked down at your plate, turning as red as one of the tomatoes in a bowl on his counter. "Well uh, this is awkward."

And disappointing, but you knew you probably shouldn't say that.

He slid your glass of water closer to you, nodding down at it. "Do you even remember anything from last night?"

"I remember the party and doucheface Cole cheating on me," you crossed your arms on the counter and shrugged your shoulders. "But the last thing I remember is getting into your car and everything after is a blur."

"I kind of figured it would be, you were off in la-la land the entire car ride, and then when we got here," he pursed his lips and raised his eyebrows. "The drinks hit you like a truck."

You groaned and rested your head onto the counter, enjoying the cool marble against your forehead. "I don't even want to know what I did."

"Well, you tripped in the garage, broke your jack daniels' pants and then told me that my dogs love you more than me, which is probably true," he laughed, taking your plate away from you and walking to the sink. "And then you tried to do God knows what and run into my living room and when I threatened to carry you upstairs, you ogled my body and said 'yes please'"

You shot your head up and grabbed the paper towels off of the rack near you, raising them. "No I didn't....ogle your body."

He shrugged his shoulders, "alright, whatever you say, drunky. Anyway, we went upstairs, I grabbed you some clothes...well, a shirt and then you uh," You could see a red tint start to form on his cheeks.

"Okay, okay you can stop," you waved your hands in front of him, shaking your head. "I don't need to know any more. But I will ask one question, why aren't you on a plane to Winnipeg?"

"Game got rescheduled. The weather up there is pretty shitty, so we don't leave for Calgary until Tuesday." He put the dishes into the dishwasher before coming back onto the counter and resting his elbows down. "So, are you going to tell me what happened last night?"

"What do you mean? You just told me?"

"No, I told you what happened last night when I got to you. I have no idea what happened before you called me."

You took a deep breath and shrugged your shoulders, clasping your hands together and smiling at him. "I mean, what else is there to say besides the fact that my boyfriend...ex-boyfriend, of two years has been cheating on me for three months?"

Tyler went to reply, but you cut him off. "Not to mention, that dress I wore to your Halloween party? The one Cole spilled a drink on and then blew up on me for ruining it? Yeah, it turns out that it was her dress," You scoffed, feeling the urge to cry become stronger. "No wonder he was so worried about it. But don't worry, she said her dad's dry-cleaner was able to get the stain out."

"Y/N..."

"You know what the worst part about all of that is?" You looked at him, eyes brimmed with tears. "She's so nice that I can't even hate her. Cole's a manipulator and I think I feel more upset at the fact that she was fooled, rather than him cheating on me. Does that mean something's wrong with me? The fact that I can't bring myself to dislike the 'other woman'? I mean, aren't I supposed to hate her?"

Tyler just stared at you, his mouth opened slightly as he looked away. You couldn't help but laugh because he just looked absolutely clueless about what he was supposed to do. "No, don't worry about it," you sniffled and wiped your cheeks of the slight evidence of tears and smiled at him. "You may have two sisters, but just like Jamie and Jordie, you're a tad bit clueless on what to say in this situation."

"I mean, yeah I don't know what to say because I'm not sad that you dumped him. Am I pissed that he cheated on you? Hell yeah, because I've told you once and I'll tell you again...you deserve so much better than that." He stood up and walked out of the kitchen, coming to a stop at the stool beside you. "I'm just sorry that he hurt you like that and I hope that I never see his bench-warming ass again or–"

"You'll put him in an ER bed, yeah yeah I've heard it before." You sighed, looking up from the counter and at Tyler, giving him an appreciative smile. "Just don't let him touch your pretty face."

"You think my face is–"

"I mean that is how you get all of your endorsements."

He rolled his eyes and shoved you as he walked into the living room. "I'll have you know, I get my endorsements from my killer body, more than my face."

I believe that, you thought, only to clear your throat and step out of the stool.

"So what are your plans for the day? I can give you a ride back to campus now if you'd like."

You sighed, leaning against the back of the couch belonging to the cushion Tyler was sitting on. "Well, I was planning on slaving away in the library all day, just to go over notes and stuff, but now...." You chewed the inside of your cheek slightly, avoiding Tyler's gaze. "Now I just kind of want to lower the risk of ever running into them on campus, but I also know that I can't just hide away in my dorm room forever."

Moments of silence passed between the two of you before Tyler stood up and walked out of the living room. When he came back, he had a shirt tossed over a shoulder, he changed into gym shorts and was smiling. "Grab the dogs for me?"

"What?" He walked out of the room again as he put on his shirt. "Why?"

"Because...just because."

You walked towards the front door where the dogs' leashes were kept. "Can you at least clue me in?"

He came around the corner from the kitchen with all three dogs following behind him and a big smile on his face. "We're going for a run."

"A RUN?!" The question came out a lot louder than you intended it to, followed by a confused look. "I can't go for a run."

"Exercising helps a hangover, Y/N. Trust me, you'll be fine."

"No, it's not that. It's just I..." you crossed your arms and sighed. "I don't have a sports bra and I doubt my bandeau would do any good if I could even find it."

Tyler instinctively looked at the shirt before clearing his throat and looking away. "Oh yeah, about that," he disappeared down the hall again, coming back with your bandeau in hand. "You kind of threw it on the floor last night before uh–" he coughed, nodding his head. "Never mind. But, I washed it with a laundry load this morning, so it's clean." He handed it to you and once again, you felt embarrassed. "So, no run, maybe just a walk instead?"

You nodded, holding onto the bandeau tightly. "Yeah, a walk sounds great. Just let me put this on and we can go."

He nodded and grabbed all three leashes from you before turning towards the dogs. You walked into the bathroom downstairs and shut the door behind you. Looking down at your former missing bandeau and remembering about what Tyler said, you couldn't help but think.

Why the hell did you throw your bandeau onto the ground and what was he going to say before changing the subject?

❒❒❒❒

Tyler was right, exercising did help you feel better. Sure, it wasn't the exercise he originally planned– but both the nice, strangely cool air, and being with Tyler and the dogs...helped a lot. You walked around the neighborhood a few times, even stopping at the small dog park and letting the dogs run around for a while. It was here while taking a quick break, Tyler suggested that you could hang out with him and the dogs for a little while longer, just to make sure that yours odds of running into either Cole or Paisley were extremely slim. You definitely weren't opposed to the idea and had to make sure that you gave a convincing performance of you contemplating whether or not it was a good idea. Though in reality, you wanted to say yes the moment the idea was spoken into existence.

When you guys got back to his house, the cool air had disappeared and Tyler suggested that you guys go hang out by the pool. You reluctantly, and after plenty of reassurance that it was washed, wore a bathing suit from Tyler's 'Lost and Found' and swam with the dogs while Tyler made you guys his 'special drink.' It took all of the power in you to refrain from laughing when he brought out a pack of white claws– though you did call him a basic white girl, to which he didn't even bother to argue. Any sense of awkwardness that once existed from earlier in the day, was completely gone by the time Tyler cannonballed into the pool. Whenever you guys were in the water, you were either playing keep-away with the dogs' toys or busy splashing or dunking the other under the water. You were the first one to initiate getting out of the pool and moving over to his jacuzzi, but it only took a few seconds for Tyler to follow you over– after he put the dogs away in the wet room so they weren't running wild before they could be hosed down.

The two of you sat in there and talked for what felt like hours, about anything and everything. He seemed really interested in your schoolwork, asking you about the courses you'd taken the last four years, what got you into the career choice. The conversation went from school to Toronto, your shared dream travel destinations, your childhoods, and as cheesy as it sounds, your fears and dreams. It was all so...personal, like two friends just passing the time, and you loved it. You weren't sure how long the two of you had been out there talking, but when you did notice that time had passed, the sun was starting to set and you were starving. Tyler ordered pizza for dinner and helped you hose off the dogs. He struggled to get Cash to cooperate until you distracted him by scratching his ears. At that point, Tyler probably sprayed you more with the hose than Cash, but you got your revenge when it came time to hose down Gerry. The young dog wanted to do anything BUT get hosed down, which resulted in Tyler having to chase him down, carry him out of the pool and hold him still, which is how you got your revenge.

After the dogs were hosed off, Tyler put them away into their designated room until they dried off. He offered for you to take the first shower, and before you could protest, saying that you had no clothes, Tyler replied 'I've got it covered.' You finished up your shower to see that he had laid out some sweatpants and another Stars 'Seguin' t-shirt out on his bed with a note that said 'don't worry, the sweats aren't from the L&F– they're Cassidy's.'

Any worry you had about you taking too long to shower was swept away during the time that you waited downstairs for Tyler to get done. In the time that he was upstairs, the pizza was delivered, the dogs were dried and fed, and you had gone through his DVR list and found a pleasant surprise– he had at least five Hallmark Christmas movies recorded. When he came downstairs, he was a little scared of the knowing smile on your face and when you asked why he had Hallmark Christmas movies recorded, he blushed and rubbed the back of his neck saying that he was thinking about giving them a try...since you gave them such a glowing recommendation. You guys hung out on the couch, sharing a blanket and just eating your pizza and watching Hallmark Christmas movies, most of which you've already seen.

After you finished the second movie, it was almost 9:30 and you definitely needed to get back home to your dorm. You told Tyler you could just order an uber back, not wanting to bother him anymore– but he insisted that he take you back to the dorm– and that offer sent the butterflies throughout your body. You never wanted the car ride to end, but with Tyler living as close as he did, you knew that eventually, it had to. This entire day was just, perfect. It was everything that you needed for what felt like a long time, and you couldn't help but be amazed that it happened with Tyler.

"I already told you, you really don't have to walk me to my dorm," you sighed, crossing your arms as you held onto your lanyard.

Tyler tugged on his hood, making sure it wouldn't fall off. "And I'm telling you, again, to suck it up because I'm doing it."

You laughed and rolled your eyes as you walked down the hallway and to your door. "You need to work on your arguments, they suck."

He just gave you a sarcastic smile as you opened the door and walked inside. "SHUT THE DOOR!"

Your eyes went wide as you saw Big Rig almost fall off of the bed while trying to grab the blanket. "OH MY GOD."

"Sorry, dude!" Tyler said, grabbing your elbow and pulling you back into the hallway, closing the door behind you. "So...that just happened."

"Oh my God," you said, bringing your hands to your temples. "Were they just?"

"Going at it? In the middle of coitus? Participating in sexual relations? Having sexua–"

You covered his mouth, giving him a glare. "You can stop now, I know what they were doing."

His laughter vibrated your hand and you pulled it away as he nodded at the door. "I guess we should give them some time to clean up?"

You knocked on the door, standing close to it. "Text me when the two of you are decent, please." Turning back to Tyler you smiled, "Walk you to your car?"

"I'd be honored."

As you made the walk out of the building and to the parking lot, you took notice of how the silence between you was comfortable and nothing like the awkward silence from this morning. Tyler had his hands buried in his sweatshirt pockets, whistling to señorita and walking at your pace.

"This seems a little opposite of how it was supposed to go, doesn't it?" He laughed, looking at you.

"Well, consider me your bodyguard so you don't get ambushed by fans, yeah?"

  He took the time to check you out, his stare making your stomach feel all warm inside. "Nah, you're too scrawny to protect me," he reached out and grabbed your bicep. "Your arms have no muscle."

"Uh, rude!" You scoffed, slapping his hand away as he laughed. "I'm sorry not all of us can freely eat a million carbs and still look like you."

"I'll take that as you appreciate my good physique." He laughed, letting the silence settle back in as you reached his car.

You could hear his keys rattling in his sweatshirt pocket as the two of you stood by the drivers' door. You brought your hands into the long sleeve shirt before crossing your arms and rocking back on your heels. "Thanks for last night, you really didn't have to do that."

"Will you stop apologizing, Y/N?" He said, shaking his head. "I'd help you no matter what the situation."

"Cause I'm Jamie's sister?"

The question came out before you could even speak and the tone hid a bit of harshness in it. You didn't know what you meant by the question. Whether you wanted it to be a neutral one or one where for a split second, you despised the fact that he was your brother's best friend, and that that small fact could be in the way of any potential relationship between the two of you.

Tyler shook his head. "No. Because you're important to me."

The fact that his answer, at least to you, seemed to be leaning in the exact direction that you wanted it to, made you happy. You sighed, leaning against his car. "Thank you for today, too, Tyler. I needed that, like...really needed it."

"I had a lot of fun and the dogs love you," he smiled kicking his shoe out towards you and nudging against your leg. "You'll have to go for walks with us more often, I swear they behave better when you're around."

"I can do that. So you really had fun today? Even with the Christmas movies?"

His smile overtook his face as he looked down, rolling his head back before looking at you again. "I guess they're not that bad."

"Oh come on, you loved ‘Christmas Under Wraps!’"

"I still stand by what I said. It was very obvious from the beginning that Garland was the North Pole and that his dad was Santa!"

You laughed and rolled your eyes as your phone vibrated in your pocket. You took it out to see a text from Kennedy saying that she and Big Rig were dressed. You sighed, putting the phone away and looking back at Tyler. "Kennedy says they're decent now, thank God. I don't think I'll ever be able to get that image of his bare ass out of my head."

Tyler just laughed before standing up. "I'll walk you back to your dorm and–"

You reached out and touched his chest, stopping him from walking any further. "Nope, you've got to get home to our puppers and give them the attention that they apparently so desperately need."

He looked at you with a look that you've only seen whenever he was flirting with someone in a bar– it was his flirty look, followed by his famous smirk. "Our puppers?"

"I take care of them when you're gone, so yes. Our puppers, now go!" You pushed him back slightly as he unlocked his car and opened the door. You turned around and walked up onto the curb, starting to walk back to your dorm.

"Y/N, wait!"

You stopped and turned around to see that he was jogging the short distance to you. He looked nervous and you just reached out with your foot and nudged his leg. "Feel free to speak before the sun rises, Seguin."

He took a deep breath as he chewed on the inside of his cheek as if he was going back and forth with himself in his thoughts. Instinctively, you reached out and touched his arm, scared that something might be wrong. "Tyler, what's wrong?"

He looked down at your hand and when you started to let it fall, he held onto it, intertwining his fingers with yours. "I mean it," he said, letting out a hard breath. "when I said that you're important to me...I meant it."

His face gave off the impression that there was more that he needed to say, but wasn't sure on how to say it– but you couldn't hear anything even if he was able to say it. Your heart was beating against your chest so hard that you're sure Tyler could hear it. When he said it the first time, you weren't all that sure of what he meant– you only hoped that it meant what you thought it could. But this time, the way he said it...you knew, and that was enough to send your nerves into a spiral. Before your mind could even begin to come up with a response, Tyler leaned in and pressed his lips softly against yours.

In what felt like minutes, but was really only a few milliseconds– you took in the way of how soft his lips felt. Forcing yourself to memorize how his beard scratched your own skin and the smell of his cologne. In case this was all a fluke and it never happened again, you needed to be able to save those tiny details in the back of your mind. When his hands came up to cup your face, that's when it settled in– this was real. 

Tyler was kissing you, this wasn't a dream. 

You grabbed onto his sweatshirt, closing the distance between your bodies and trying to pull him closer than was physically possible. You've wanted this for what felt like, and could possibly be, years. And now it was happening and you never wanted it to end. The moment you made the move to take the kiss from PG to at least some good PG-13 action, Tyler pulled away.

You didn't want to open your eyes, scared that if you did, Tyler would probably be looking at you with some sort of regrettable expression– and seeing that would probably break you. Because even though he made the first move, you were unsure of whether or not it was something he wanted to do. You opened your eyes anyway to see Tyler standing there with wide eyes, but a small smile– as if he was surprised himself that he had kissed you. He reached down and held onto your hand again, squeezing it. "I had a lot of fun."

Just as soon as he had squeezed your hand, he let it go, turned back and jogged to his car. He wasted no time getting inside and turning it on and before you could even wave goodbye, he was already making his way out of the parking lot.

You stood there for a few seconds, watching him disappear from view and still in shock from what just happened. He had actually made a move. Weeks of back and forth and he had finally done what Kennedy and Big Rig said he probably wanted to do. It wasn't an extravagant kiss in any way. It was a simple, yet perfect kiss that set your body on fire.

You laughed to yourself, running your tongue along your teeth before shaking your head and walking back to your dorm.  There were a lot of things that you knew about Tyler. Some you'd learned years ago, some you learned through the press, and some that you had just learned today. Of all of the things that you knew, your favorite had to have been the one you found out just moments ago.

That with a kiss so frustratingly innocent and perfect, one that still left a lingering feeling of his lips against your own– he managed to set fire to your entire body...and left you wanting so much more.

Ty’s Top 5 Reviews: TBOYAI

The fic being talked about: The Book Of You And I

You know the drill. I have picked my favorite comments on my fic to respond and share with you guys :) here we go!

#5: @damselindistressanu:  YOU HAD TO BREAK MY HEART DIDNT YOU?!?! &  #still loved this to bits tho #you never fail to amaze me Bub

to be fair... it’s not my fault. But i do apologize for the pain :( I’m so glad you loved it!! thank you so much <3 (i can’t describe the smile on my face from being called Bub wtf)

#4: @meganwinchester1999:  Ahhhhh how could you, Ty?! 😭😭😭😭😭 I knew it wouldn't be long before the angst appeared again and damn did it appear. I can't believe she covered that up like the time they had together meant nothing

You are right... it was only a matter of time lol. This was tough to write in some moments. After such a fluff high, this really breaks my heart. Maybe she covered it up for a reason... maybe we’ll talk about it in part two.

#3: @gigglyirwin:  PLEASE I NEED IT I CANT STOP CRYING #everyone go beg ty for a part 2 & #ashton irwin #fic rec #TY WHAT THE FUCK #I KNOW I REQUESTED THIS SONG FIC #BUT I WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO LISTEN TO THE SONG EVER AGAIN WITHOUT SOBBING #CHECK YOUR SNAP SO YOU CAN SEE MY FUCKING TEARS #when i tell you my heart physically hurts rn #god dammit ty #you talented mother fucker i love you 

You’re right. This IS your fault smh. making me hurt all these people... The song is an absolute banger and it’ll for sure make me fucking sad when i listen to it too. That video of you crying was lowkey gold and i’m sorry that i kinda laughed at it. I’m kinda evil if you can’t tell. I love you more.

#2: @g-l-pierce:  I just feel like you didn’t have to do me like that. I was sitting here thinking “Yes girl. Gimme some of that Ashton love.” And all I got was heartbreak. 😭🥺 So well written, as usual! ♥️ can’t wait for the next fic!

The truth is that I knew how to get youuuuuu. Oh it sounded so sweet and tender(that’s always my trap), but then BAM. you get hit with hurt. Thank you so much!!! I’m excited for you to read my next couple of fics!!

#1: @flameraine:  Next time you want to rip my heart out and shatter it at 2am, give me a heads up so I can be drunk for it. Omg I'm in literal tears. 💔😢 I'm hoping for a part 2. 3. 4.....

oh my. this made me laugh. I never thought someone would need to get drunk because of me. I’m so sorry aout the tears :( I teared up a bit, too. Def gonna be a part two to hopefully get y’all to feel better!

honorable mentions: @cxddlyash and @cashton-queen for basically saying what the fuck” and “fuck you, you better fix this”

Jac & Savannah

Jac: Are you warm enough? Jac: 🧣🤗🧤🤗🧥 Savannah: No but that's a total secret, okay? I can't cope with the others judging me for trying to look nice Jac: I'll never tell Jac: [subtly getting her a blanket or something though, obviously] Jac: no one can come for your look 😍 Savannah: [you know we're snuggling under this blanket together because shameless excuse to be close af] Savannah: oh I see, you're trying to warm me up by making me 😳 it's fine that can be our secret too Jac: [would be so 😳 forreal] Jac: you can blame the 🔥 Savannah: [putting her head on the bae's shoulder like we're not already close enough and doing a little happy sigh] Savannah: but your compliments deserve full credit, anything else would be unfair Jac: [patting her head under the guise of checking out the boujee hat] Jac: your outfit arguably deserves a higher class of event but I'm still glad you're here Savannah: [doing a hat swap because we do so love sharing clothes with the bae and it's amusing as well as a shameless excuse to check her out like hmm what do we think] Savannah: I'm glad I'm here too Jac: It would be weird if you weren't Jac: I'm as close to you as my siblings now Jac: in a different way, obviously but still Savannah: [swapping the hats back because the bae is serving a look and also then we have to fix her hair and make that a moment™ soz Amelia for this blatant flirting you are witnessing rn] Savannah: I feel so at home here, with you Jac: [when you think the bae is perfect so you can't even pretend to sort her hair, so you end up fussing with your own after her like ugh it's so unruly but we're 🥰 and seriously soz have a more or something] Jac: You are Jac: you're always welcome, even when we're celebrating weird non-holiday holidays Savannah: [just giving her all the compliments out loud because we see that fussy and also we don't care who hears us, again soz Amelia and snuggling again] Savannah: I'd make you the same offer in a heartbeat if I felt welcome at my house Jac: [snuggling her extra hard for a hot sec there] Jac: I know, baby Savannah: [likewise and just burying our face in the bae's shoulder fully because emotions and doing a little sad sigh this time] Jac: [doing something to make her happy, probably posting the picture of her for example] Savannah: [giving her all the compliments again because that is a good picture tbh gal you clearly have skills but then because I'm evil I'm gonna say your bf sees it and so you're texting him forever while he's with his friends doing whatever] Jac: [at least you have an excuse to get up, like your other guests lol] Savannah: [just gotta do something extra as she's getting up like take her hand and make her do a little spin or something cos you're a nerd and we know you care more about this than whatever your bf is saying] Jac: don't faint Savannah: catch me & it won't be an issue Jac: I don't need to tell you it's dangerous to play near or with 🔥 Savannah: [as close to a LOOK as we can get away with] Jac: 😈 Savannah: he wants to see me, like, right now Savannah: but I don't think he's offering a higher class of event Jac: 😏 and obviously, you have to make him sweat it out a bit Jac: right? Savannah: all night at least Jac: Poor Ty Savannah: Do you think I'm being too 😈? Jac: not enough, if anything Savannah: oh really, well I hate that Jac: I'm sure it'll do the job on Ty Jac: but I think you could do better Savannah: of course I could, especially if the alternative means disappointing you Savannah: I don't ever want to Jac: It's very unlikely that you could Savannah: It's impossible, I promise Jac: Don't worry, it wasn't a challenge Savannah: I'm not worried if it is, I'll rise to it for you Jac: 🌠🌠🌠 Jac: I am going to have to challenge my brother not to be that basic white boy who brings out an acoustic 'round the campfire, excuse me 🙄😅 Savannah: 😄 Savannah: as long as Isabelle doesn't decide to sing along, because it'll be a challenge for me to sit through that Jac: 😬 Jac: she ALWAYS gets the words wrong! Jac: I think she might be partially deaf Savannah: you would know Savannah: it's a shame she's HOPELESS at sign language Jac: honestly, she'd need to do some brain training first Jac: bless her Savannah: I'm still waiting for you to teach me, maybe I'll be worse than she is Jac: [gutted you can't say gay things 'cos most people here can understand but you can still come teach her] Savannah: [Amelia do be watching you and she definitely can] Savannah: [Jude would also just be chiming in telling Savannah what she's doing wrong like a blunt bitch so now we're mortified because we have to be good at everything] Jac: [just showing her how to tell Jude to fuck off or something like excuse you] Savannah: [literally never swears because she's that kind of trying to be classy so you've been spared gal but we're not forgetting that you made us look a fool] Jac: She literally couldn't tie her own shoes 'til like last year Jac: I wouldn't spend any energy on her Savannah: it's fine, I'd rather know my mistakes Jac: She knows it's as rude to listen in on a sign conversation as it is a normal one Jac: honestly, I don't know where her manners have gone half the time Savannah: I'll have to get better now so we can have a conversation worth listening in on Jac: I'll show you properly Jac: when we have some privacy Savannah: you can come home with me, we'll have plenty of privacy if we leave here late enough Jac: You're really gonna make him wait then Jac: 😘 Savannah: he'll be too drunk to be any use to me once his friends are done with him Savannah: & anyway, I want to be with you Jac: Good Jac: of course I'll come Savannah: I feel like I haven't even seen you since Ty & I reconciled, I've really missed you Jac: he had a lot he had to make up for Jac: so I've missed you more Savannah: [touching that necklace he gave us without realising we're doing it as we recall that horrible argument] Savannah: I'm all yours now Jac: Good Jac: because we're both going to need really long 🛀 to get the smoke smell out of our hair Savannah: ugh true! I'll wash yours if you wash mine Jac: 100% Jac: and would you ever trust a boy with your hair, no matter how sorry he is Savannah: No way! Savannah: plus he's too tall to fit in the 🛁 with me, even the huge one at my house Savannah: he'd just sulk the entire time Savannah: I'm so sorry I'm taller than the other girl you dated Jac: the basketball boys always go out with tiny girls Jac: it's like their thing Jac: so weird Savannah: right? 🙄 Savannah: it's a totally possessive thing, I'm glad you can't stand over me to feel powerful, excuse me Jac: honestly Jac: people always talk about short guy's complexes but tall lads think they're so superior just for having a few inches, okay we get what you're trying to put out and it ain't cute Savannah: exactly Savannah: & if picking me up & throwing me around is SUCH a turn on for you, work at it 💪🏾 I have to put in effort to look good too Jac: Not about it Savannah: Ty isn't either, he's the gentlest boy in the world Jac: Yeah he is Savannah: maybe too gentle sometimes, but I didn't say so Jac: I get it Jac: you don't have to think he's perfect just because you're going out with him Savannah: he definitely doesn't think I am Jac: he's got no complaints though Savannah: for now, I suppose Jac: he told me, you saw Jac: he thinks you're good, if not perfect Savannah: he doesn't want to lose me Jac: he's not stupid Savannah: ^^ he'll say anything, that's what boys do Jac: yeah Jac: how much they mean is a different story Savannah: my dad's never meant a single word he's said to us Jac: even if he meant it at the time Jac: he didn't stick to his word, and that's what counts Savannah: yes, it is Jac: Ty's dependable Savannah: I'm not though, I'm a wreck Jac: hey Jac: [looks at her and shakes her head like no] Jac: do you want to go inside for a bit? we can be getting more food and drinks or whatever Savannah: okay Jac: [casually run off hand in hand so you can go properly talk about this] Savannah: [soz not soz everyone] Jac: [also said your garden would not be that big so probably gonna need to go upstairs or down so everyone's not just 👀 lol] Savannah: [get in the basement for that parallel] Jac: [sounds creepy but yes lol, go forth for that privacy hens] Savannah: [yet again we're just telling the bae stuff that we haven't told anyone including our bf #bonding] Jac: [we know the fucking vibes, y'all gonna be ages and do not care remotely] Savannah: [gotta fix Savannah's makeup for her to because she'll have done a little cry so that's gay & intimate] Jac: [honestly how this kiss doesn't happen sooner hun] Savannah: [that's the scolding hot tea] Jac: [casual patience of a saint somehow] Savannah: [we both know you're scared to cross that line hens] Jac: [mhmm how you just don't though when the tension is this high and obvious but you know, sort yourselves out] Savannah: [for now though go back outside to find Amelia has left] Jac: how rude Savannah: Do you have any messages from her? Jac: she told them she was feeling sick Jac: but she's not said anything more than that in a message either Savannah: one of her migraines? Jac: probably Jac: smoke can be a trigger, I guess Jac: oh well, I'll message her in the group chat, make sure she's okay Savannah: I hope she got home okay Savannah: it was a bit rude of Is not to go with her & make sure Jac: ^^ I'm like, girl Jac: you've had THREE hot dogs Jac: you could've done without the last one to be a better friend but priorities, I suppose Savannah: ^^ she could've at least come & got us so we could do the right thing if she wasn't going to Jac: Seriously Jac: now I look lowkey bad like thanks 🙄 Savannah: No, it's my fault Savannah: I feel bad, poor Amelia Jac: Oh my God, no, it's so not your fault Savannah: it's okay, I know I'm beyond demanding Jac: You aren't Jac: She just has a headache Jac: you're actually going through it right now Jac: you deserve time to vent Savannah: 😔 Savannah: but I do understand if you're upset with me Jac: I'm not, at all Jac: just at Is a bit for not handling the whole situation properly Savannah: Would you like me to talk to her? Jac: That's fine, we don't need to get into their drama Jac: it's like, not a situation and not going to be one because Is either wants it to be or is literally too ditzy to check in on Amelia herself without being explicitly told Savannah: You're right Savannah: you deserve a good night even if it is a fake holiday Jac: I'm having a good night with you Savannah: Oh please, I can do better Savannah: I've been crying for most of it Savannah: [proves it by doing the most, throwing ourselves into all the activities and thus the bae as well] Savannah: [I like to imagine poor Isabelle trying to get involved & we're just subtly not having it] Jac: [montage time, honestly Is you would've been better to leave too, at least the fam is here so you aren't being totally ignored lol] Savannah: [soz that we're just falling in love here] Jac: [literally can't help it sorry they don't mean the harm they casually do] Savannah: now you're having a good night Jac: an even better one, yeah Savannah: I'll be your 🌠 Savannah: anything you want, all you have to do is whisper it to me & I'll make sure it comes true Jac: Tinkerbell's got nothing on you Savannah: your happiness is so important to me, with or without the 👏🏾 Jac: you know I'd do anything for you too Jac: I feel like I should do more Jac: be better Savannah: you do more for me than anyone else EVER has, if you did more you'd be putting your own mental health & wellbeing at risk for the sake of mine Savannah: I'm not trying to be a drain of you like Is, who literally needs her hand held through every little thing Jac: I know, you're just so good to me Jac: but you're good FOR me too Savannah: I'm not always this selfish, I swear Jac: you're literally the most selfless Jac: all you do is look after Sienna and you're the best friend to me and girlfriend to Ty Jac: it hurts my heart sometimes Jac: I just wanna take care of you and make your life so easy you can thrive and shine Savannah: You're going to make me cry again Savannah: [IRL 🥺 because the bae is so pure & genuinely takes such good care of us] Savannah: I'll survive this & you'll see what I'm actually like without all this drama surrounding me Savannah: I really will be the best friend to you forever Jac: [we're such emotional bitches atm and always tbh hennys] Jac: I know you will, you're already amazing Jac: you're going to be unstoppable Jac: and I'm gonna be right there with you Savannah: [it's the only emotion we can safely express rn because smooching is forbidden] Savannah: I'm totally fine with doing trust falls Savannah: you know I believe in you & our future together Jac: 🌍 sister connection Jac: [because we are all earth signs except Amelia soz gal] Savannah: ^^ yes! Savannah: [take your bae to dance because it's a party and that's the only excuse we need] Jac: [bye at how much of a moment that'd be] Savannah: [literally there's every chance it's the first time they have because her bf would always be there at parties and stuff so I'm deceased] Jac: [we know you'd have no qualms stealing her away but a party with loads of peers is different from how intimate this is, at best everyone has a few friends] Savannah: [exactly that, so glad you don't have to see this Amelia you really would have a headache] Jac: [yeah this would be 💔] Savannah: [thank god we've got Isabelle cockblocking rn because y'all are too in love tbh] Jac: [just joins in 'cos not in love with you and thus oblivious] Savannah: [they'd be so annoyed lol] Jac: [lmao oh isabelle] Savannah: [go get some drinks or something gals and whisper shade to each other about this poor third wheel because any excuse to keep that intimacy going] Jac: [it's a good thing you are lowkey oblivious or you'd be way more upset by it all too] Savannah: [god bless you Isabelle, so soz you get done so dirty] Jac: [in the end you live your best life, just not being friends with this squad lol] Savannah: [the best thing for you is getting new friends my love, but for now I like to imagine she's talking to them about some boy or other, remember those you massive gays] Jac: 😬 him Jac: seriously?!? Savannah: What is she thinking of? & more importantly, what part of her body is leading her in those thoughts Jac: 😷 I can't Jac: so many cold showers necessary for her and honestly just some 🧼 for him Savannah: He asked me out, knowing full well I'm not single or interested, it was horrific Jac: the definition of no shame Savannah: I didn't know what to do Jac: I bet you didn't Jac: the actual nerve Savannah: Not to sound like Amelia, but I genuinely have no understanding of what she approves of or thinks we'll approve of about most of the boys she talks about Jac: Availability? Jac: like, imagine that was all a boy had to say about you Savannah: that's so sad Jac: like if they weren't so gross themselves, I'd feel sorry for them Savannah: I've just decided, I'm going to find her a boyfriend we can all stand to be around, Ty'll know someone Savannah: it'll give you a much needed break from how clingy she is & my heart won't hurt anymore from hearing her talk like this about boys who aren't worthy Jac: Such a nice idea 👼🏾 Jac: does he know anyone that will deal with her though Jac: she's a lot Savannah: It may not be an overnight success but I'll work my 🔮✨ Jac: I believe in nothing harder than I believe in your magic Savannah: I'm your girl too, just like you told Ty, of course you have faith in me & because you do, I feel so capable of anything 🥰 Jac: It had to be said Jac: like we said, the possessive thing, not it Jac: you're you and you're so many things to so many people, and you're especially important to me Jac: if he wants you, he's gotta accept that Savannah: ^^^ Savannah: I love you & you're always going to be part of my life, I hope he is too, obviously but there's none of that uncertainty with you, you are & you will be Jac: Right, romantic relationships are arguably almost always the least secure, that's just realistic Jac: ask any girl who ditches ALL her friends and then gets dumped Savannah: oh god, I could NEVER Savannah: I need you Jac: The concession they must make in their lives, like, who do you talk to about the stuff he has no interest in, who gives you advice from a woman's perspective??? Jac: so toxic Savannah: He & I have very different styles of self care, I'm sorry I simply would not survive Jac: 🏋️ is part of the daily grind, NOT a way to unwind, sorry Ty Savannah: 😄 Savannah: Don't worry, I promise I won't wake you as early tomorrow for our workout Jac: I'm not, I nearly ALWAYS wake up before you Jac: but that's okay, you look adorable and very peaceful 😴😘 Savannah: well it takes me longer to fall asleep Savannah: you look even more adorable & peaceful then 👼🏻☁ Jac: okay, so we're even 😅 Savannah: the universe is keeping everything in balance for us Savannah: I love that Jac: I know, right? Jac: if we had a 👶🏾 or a job share we'd be KILLING it Savannah: 🥺 you're going to have the cutest babies ever! Jac: 🤞 the dad's DNA doesn't screw that up Savannah: No way, we'll find you someone perfect Jac: I have more hope for Uni Savannah: you don't trust my matchmaking skills? Jac: No, no Jac: just the boys you have to choose from here 😬😂 Savannah: 😄You're right, an LDR makes much more sense for you & I wouldn't have to share you as often Savannah: I'll find you a first year uni boy who goes to school with Ty's brother Jac: You think so? Savannah: definitely, he'll fit into your schedule without wanting to become your schedule Savannah: & you may actually be able to have & sustain a proper conversation, depending what he studies Jac: you really do have the best ideas Jac: Obviously down Savannah: [immediately starts sending her pics and profiles because we're extra] Savannah: Let me know who you like & I'll totally make it happen Jac: I'll look properly tonight at yours Jac: [like no, Isabelle, you may not have more than a peep so you're #curious] Savannah: there's no rush, whenever you're ready Jac: 😍😍 Savannah: [snuggling again with our IRL 😍 because we're in love bitch] Savannah: [Savannah is just that touchy feely hoe like soz gal she's gonna just be touching you ALL THE TIME] Jac: [at least you'd have to vaguely get used to it or literally die haha, we know the 😍 are and will be for you but we'll pretend to be into these lads so we can scheme it together] Savannah: [we've since the pics you had a touchy feely vibe with Amelia too, even if it was more like hugs and piggy backs lol you can do this] Jac: [mhmm, arguably you can't but you carry it on for a long time lol]

****

linking this here bc it was technically a journal? i just don’t want it on my notes anymore and if i ever (likely not to) want to re-read for whatever reason. please note that i knew people would read this so things are censored and are the basic version. also there was a switch at one point from **** to chris because i didn’t want things to be read

(for later when i got time lmao)

Matt is a piece of shit that just wants to fuck -Chloe

well fuck

here goes nothing

the plan: don’t get drunk bc i got shit to do early next morning and ill tell him tomorrow when i do get drunk. spoiler alert that didn’t work

Gaby (coles gf) came too btw

so i had a smirnoff ice and said no more than two shots after so id be buzzed but not fully drunk (i ended up having three and was very much drunk)

me jon and gaby we’re talking about guys and i mentioned something about liking a guy or some shit and gaby looks at matt and then me and confirms it with me. then she tells me that apparently when she met me and a few other friends at the beach last quarter, that she predicted the two of us would end up together and told cole this. im like wtf how and she claims she’s psychic lol

later, Matt and i are on the sack and he looks at me and goes do you like me and im thinking well fuck so i say yes and he’s like well shit sorry but (and then i forgot exactly what he said) something along the lines of it’s not mutual or it’s not the right timing (i forgot okay) and then he gets up after a bit to go to the bathroom (I’m pretty sure cole went out too) and then me gaby and Jon have a chisme session and they think that he does like me but whatever

so the guys come back and at this point i really need to pee again so matt offers to take me and we start talking and he’s all, oh im sorry if i led you on and shit and im like it’s alright ill get over it, it just might be a bit awkward for me for a bit. but then on our way back from the bathroom he asks me , do you wanna at least kiss your crush at least one time and im like uhh yeah so he kisses me and then we start talking but i forgot about what and im kinda dizzy so he says, oh let’s sit on the couches for a bit before we go back, so we do and somehow we kiss again and then start making out

and at this point im like bitch there’s no way you don’t like me like why would you do that if you didn’t

so we finally go back and it’s been some time so the rest of em are obviously curious

matt goes with cole to the bathroom again and the three of us have a chisme session otra vez and they’re like yeah he fucking likes you he’s prob just scared bc of his last relationship

cole comes back in and basically backs up their side based on his convo he just had with matt

and so it’s decided that we’ll both sleep on the sack, Jon sleeps on his bed and the other two together in coles bed

he comes back and we all “go to sleep” but I push for him to hold me like he usually does whenever we sleep together and around like 2,3 am we both start making out again and just like uhhhh

also we’re both very much drunk but of course i tend to remember things whenever ive gotten drunk, however, he did not and so now we gotta talk and figure shit out and go from there

also im not telling Emilou or Hanna yet until we figure things out so

yeah

fuck

alrighty, so after last night, ive decided to do absolutely nothing about it and decided to just let things play out the way things do. i don’t wanna say something and ruin our friendship that we have bc i trust him a lot and like hanging out with him, so, i guess the end of this note for now, unless the situation changes anytime soon

Can Tim see what I write on this?     -Chloe

Yes -Janet

Hi Tim!

-Chloe

Tim pls respond.

-Chloe

Hi Chloe! Sorry I have been busy at home LOL

He responded I’m so happy!

-Chloe

FYI im just going to add things at the top of the note so that its easiwr to see stuff when i add it bc then otherwise youd have to scroll a ton

and I’m dating shit so i know when I wrote stuff and my memory and yeahhh

FEB 15 1 pm

chillin in alp so lets get this chisme

alrighty so last night i stayed the night in pratts but it wasnt just me so calmate, it was me and jon bc long story short i was too lazy/dizzy to get up and jons roommate had her bf over. basically we both shared the bed, not a lot of physical contact but whateva

brb

anyways, there was also one point where he was watching a movie from his childhood and idk what tf it was but he was shocked that i havent seen those movies, so apparently now im gonna watch them so i told him for payback we gotta watch disney movies lmao

oh also! i fucking got back to my room and took a shower to get ready for class, and when hanna gets back from class shes all like oh you slept in HiS rOoM huh and i was like uhhh yeah and told her the truth like i was too lazy and dizzy to get up and then she didnt really say anything but uhhhh yikes

and then i mentioned this to emilou later when we were walking to class and shes like yeah idk why she did that that was weird and i was thinking like thank God she doesnt think the same as hanna bc shes also slept in his room on the bean bag a few times

FEB 14 2pm

heyyy its valentines day and guess whos still single and workinggg

so uhhh last night, around 1, both me and pratt finished our shit (hw and studying) and im wide awake so im like hey, brooklyn 99? (because i got him into the show and i love rewatching the show bc its sooo good) and hes down so we start watching in his room. were both on his bed but were sitting (for the tie being) and eventually i decide to lay down and use one of his pillows but its the flat pillow so i attempt to steal his other one, which he protests and we lowkey wrestle over it and eventually i fail ugh and i fall over in frustration and land my head on his knee and then just quit and stay there, but get this, he just deals with it and lays on top of me, like his head is on my side. granted we both also have pillows so like his pillow is in between me and him and same for me but like ughhh

and eventually i fall asleep for like an episode (?) and wake up right before 3 am, and then decide hey sleep sounds important bc i have an 8 am and so does he, so i sit up but im too lazy to get up right away so i sit and go through twitter and shit so chris just lays down with his head on my leg and i set my arm down on his chest and he falls asleep for a few minutes and then i finish going through my social media and every part of me doesnt wanna move, but im also in a position that would be uncomfortable to fall asleep in so i wake him up and then go back to my room

oh and the other thing i forgot was that for a good couple hours we were texting and joking around and yeahhh

i feel like im reading a lot into what happens but at the same time, like i doubt id be this comfortable doing shit with guys like this and idk about him, but like sometimes i wonder you know?

also, saturday night, as far as i know, its just me and him going to the basketball game bc idk who else is going (eye emoji insert here bc im on my computer lmao) so we'll see what happens

FEB 10 11am

okay soooo last night,

the plan was to get buzzed, just me and matt and watch Brooklyn 9-9 but then Anthony and emilou joined us so never mind. after a bit, Anthony leaves so he can answer a phone call and pratt offers me shot #1 and not emilou (she’s laying on the bean bag, I’m on his roommates bed chillin behind her so she can’t see what’s up)

we take two and im slightly buzzed but i think “hey lets see how much we can take before she notices” and he’s down so uhhh let’s get this

later we have to include Anthony and he’s down to see how much we can take and he just lets us continue, i get to 4 shots and he finishes the bottle so i can’t have a 5th

brb im gonna go eat with him

okay im back now...

anyways were both pretty out of it, emilou still hasnt noticed and anthony finds this all funny i assume and so do i , and eventually she finds out and then the two of them leave i guess around 2 am and the two of us are both on the bean bag and were both tired and drunk and drunk me like petting his hair and apparently holding his hand and well yeah i kinda hate drunk me bc if that wasnt obvious enough lmao :/

continuin, we basically end up cuddled together most of the night until we both kind of sober up hella early in the morning and kind of separate a bit

and so in the morning guess who brought it uppp and i at least have an excuse that i was drunk and not thinking and just kinda doing whatever drunk me wanted to do (but omggg his hair is so fucking nice to play with omg) anyways imma just die real quick bc idk what happens now

also since no one else was in the room literally no one else knows about this and i think were keeping it that way bc lets be honest if anyone found out about that i think id be screwed for secret keeping and then well yeah

FEB 8 1AM

i remembered:

sunday 2-3

i forgot this happened but before I ended up in chris’s room i was chillin upstairs watching tv and then he came out on the phone with some one and long story short he said something on the phone to his friend along the lines of “you’re gonna have me in your life for a long time” and when he was saying that i was looking at him bc soy chismosa and i was curious and he winked at me and I died

Monday 2-4

so the other thing that happened was I had lunch/dinner with him before my writing class and no recuerdo que decimos, but uhhhh yeah

i like hanging out with him

also, just got back from his room and am more convinced that he may not like me but actually just sees me as a friend but at the same time maybe he does but IDK

i hate feelings and it’d be so much easier if i didn’t have them sometimes lmaooo

FEB 7 5-7 PM

so im currently in the room rn so im gonna try to make this as chronological as possible

saturday 2-2

alrighty so mind you this is the day ive volunteered with ship and have spent the whole day there, (i dont remember why i thought this was relevant :/)

so saturday night, i go to work in his room around 8 (?) so i can work on my essay and finish my shit bc he has a bean bag thats hella comfy to work on

andd so later on, jocelyn comes in to watch anime with him and then after i finish we all decide to watch gabriel iglesias and ended up squishing together on the bean bag with me in the middle of the two of them

and so were all chillin there, laughing whatever and at one point chris fucking pratt puts his head on my shoulder for a little bit and i dIeDddd

and eventually i fall asleep when we start watching emperors new groove and mind you im fucking next to chris pratt like uhhhh my GOD

so i wake up once the movies over and then go to the bathroom and come back and by then he has taken over the whole bean bag and im sad that i cant just get back and go back to sleep so i go back to my room

(hanna doesnt know what time i get back i think and im pretty sure it was around4 am) (emilous also not here bc she went home for the weekend)

sunday 2-3

so i decide hey i was productive yesterday and decide to return to his room to work on shit and try to get as much done before work in theevening

i finish around 1/2? and then i tell him im bored and i wanna do something before work but idk what so he says lets go to the rec room and its just the two of us and its chillin and he puts me on his story playing pool lmao

and then i go to work :(

but then THEN later after work i go for a run and end up back in his room and theres a couple other people there and so were all chilling (mind you this is around midnight)

and somehow i end up falling asleep on the bean bag next to this girl jon from my hall and (this is a secret in a secret) but i hear her get up at one point and then chris pratt then joins me and during the night im tossing and turning and leaning on him a bit (ughhhh i died a shit ton)

monday 2-4

so in the morning around 720 or so i wake up pay dumb and am like oh whend you get here and he explains and then hes like yeah i dont really know the girl who slept in my bed (one of jons friends) and i figured since im more comfortable with you id just move here (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! fuck me upppp) [please note that when i say fuck me up i dont mean that type of fuck]

alrighty thats what i remember that i havent told you, and then the other bit from the screen record was tuesday and now its thursday and here i am in guess whos room again

possibly staying the night lmao

but jons also here so its not like im staying the night staying the night

fwb↠ lovers!yukhei

warnings; obvi sexual stuff, some cursing, 16++!!!

listen i am a HOE for lucas

but lbr so are u 

who isn’t like have you SEEN that man GOD

anywho letzgetit

lucas aka wong yukhei was one of your friends ever since u two got paired up for a presentation in college

super cocky when u approached him first 

u were like

“hi so will we go to yours ?”

he was like

“( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) oh we’re goin to mine huh? that fast u must want me bad( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)“

u just rolled ur eyes and was like

“listen here u damn TREE i meant so we could work on the presentation!!”

he’s like “yea sure whatever u say babe”

so u just rolled ur eyes again and was abt to leave before he grabbed ur hand and was like im jk!! gimme ur number so we can sort out a day

so u do bc i mean who wouldnt give lucas their number

when u get home u already have a message from him

“hey it’s lucas :)”

“lemme know what day suits u, im p much free all week!”

he actually wasn’t free all week but would have cancelled any plans for u in a heartbEAT 

little do u know, homeboy been lowkey crushin’ on you ever since he saw u strut into the same lecture room as him

then u tripped but thats BESIDes tHe poInT

u text back and are like

“i’m free tommorow if that suits u?”

you didn’t expect a text back so quick

you put your phone down for 00.02 seconds before

WHA-PING

its ya boi lucas double texting u

“yeah i’m free haha said i was free all week :)”

“that came off as kinda passive aggressive im sorry thats not what i meant??”

hehehe u just smile to ur self what a cutie

you set up to meet at the campus cafe the next day at like 2pm bc god knows ur ass won’t be up before 1pm

again once u put ur phone down thinking the convo was over

WHA-PING-DING

its lucas again 

“so..what are u doin rn? i’m just workin out haha :)”

wong yukhei rlly out here bein all fuckboyish and shit but u bein ur good, sin free self ignore the DEVILS calling and go do ur own things around the house

ignoring the WHA-PINGS

next day rolls around 

you’re at the cafe like 10 mins early because u didn’t want to b late 

and woahh whose already sitting inside at the corner table w two chairs??

and two steaming cups of coffee??

yeah u guessed it lucASS

looking fine as heLL in literally just a white hoodie??

you know THIS look

that whole ass look

okay stop staring at his beautiful self and go i n s i d e

bby boy does a lil jump of surprise when u walk up he was so immersed in his phone

he was not looking up “how to get someone to like u” fucjakjks

he’s all smiley and is like

“ (✿◠‿◠) i didn’t know what drink u liked so i just got u a coffee, hope its okay(✿◠‿◠)“

ssjdhsjd ofc its okay baby!!

u just nod and say you’ll pay next time

he gets a lil blushy bc your both gone meet up again aw

so you both start working, he has ideas so do you, so you both compromise and wow u two make a great team

at some point the convo turns from school to sharing drunk stories of ur friends

a few coffees & lots of laughing later u suddenly realize its gotten rlly late bc of how dark it is outside!!

cue lucas using this as an opportunity to be all suave & gentlemanly 

“wow it’s gotten late, i’ll walk you home!!” 

so ur both on course to ur apartment 

he tries to be that boy and put his jumper on u because he saw u shiver for 00.001 second

but ur like lol no thanks im not cold

the tips of ears go red & poor bby is embarrassed  so he goes all pouty :((

then u feel bad bc homeboy was jus tryna be nice :((

so u end up wrappin yourself up in it and now hes all :))

now ur all :))) too

when u get to ur apt he kinda awkwardly shuffles outside so u invite him inside so he can “warm up” before he leaves

and whooo did u two “warm up”

he takes a seat on ur sofa & is kinda mindlessly babbling as u put on some music and bring him over a warm drink 

so ur both just sittin there bbq sauce on ya titties

and then its like some sort of sudden tension arises??

he stops babbling and just stares at u 

u stare back, slowly putting down ur drink

then ur leaning in oh so s l o w l y

he places his big ass hand on the side of ur face, eyes hovering from ur lips to ur eyes, asking for permission 

you give him a lil nod and he s w o o p s the fuck in

his plump lips are soft, a lil chapped and the first kiss is tender, he pulls away after a few seconds

he looks at you thru half lidded eyes and oop you pulled him back to ya lips hehe

from there it escalates 

he leans back onto the sofa and pulls you ontop of him, in a straddling position

one of his hands moves from your face down to your waist holding u tightly against while the other is rubbing circles on the exposed skin below your shirt

his tongue pushes past your lips, to meet yours and you thread your fingers through his hair, tugging lightly at the ends

this elicits a deep ass groan outta him and he pulls back suddenly, tilting his head up towards you

you’re slightly panting as you take note of his swollen lips and slight blush dusting his cheeks

he notices the same things about you and smirks before your face back towards him

to ur slight disappointment it’s not as heated as before, just a lil soft kiss and hes pulling away again

ur like 

“<(｀^´)> why’d u stopp <(｀^´)>“

he just chuckles w his deeper than the ocean voice pinches ur cheek lightly

“because as much as i’d like to keep goin, it’s a bit too fast paced don’t you think?”

you flush again as u didn’t even think about what he was feeling and nodded, burying your face into the crook of his neck

but the hypocrisy of this bOY

the next time u two meet up to “work on the project” u end up goin to his place and oop hes got u beneath him on his bed, both of ur shirts on the floor 

his mouth is set on marking your neck, collarbones while his hips are lightly grinding down on you, you feeling his bulge from beneath his tracksuit pants

you wrap you legs around him, pulling him even closer before flipping him over somehow

he’s a lil surprised as you take ur turn to pepper his neck and collarbones w love bites but he’s not complaining as u can tell from his quiet moans beneath you

you make your way lower on his body, stopping just before the waistband of his pants, looking up at him

“can i?”

u ask him first because consent is important kids

he nods so fast ur afraid his head is gona pop off 

you pull his pants & underwear down and wha-ping there he is

you grasp him at the base and lucas throws his head back, almost banging it off his headboard but does he care? nope.

so after ya know, suck the soul out of him

homeboy needs a phat minute to get his breath back

but ur pulling ur top back on, ready to go bc u felt like he woulda kicked u out but nOPE

the second he catches u ready to leave, he grabs u and pulls u back down onto the bed w him

ur like??? but in a good way

he ends up peppering ur face w lots of kisses and u gigglin bc aw

but then the kisses end up getting more heated as he makes his way down ur body, ur shirt leaving u once again, as well as ur pants and oops ur underwear too??

he ends up giving back what he received :)))

after that night, you both agree to keep it casual

basically friends w benefits

lucas loves the idea 

at first

like the thought of him bein’ able to text you whenever he was horny and not block him? great. gettin’ the occasional nude from you during his classes and ending up hard for an hour? not the best, but he’ll take it.

bUT the sight of you coming down off your high that he gave you while still panting his name softly??? 100000% HERE for it

wearing his shirt as you tumble around his bedroom, your neck covered in lovebites from him leaves him 97% soft and 3% sorta kinda horny

but he wants to be able to text you abt how your day was or what you’re doing for the day him or just listen to you rant!! not just when he pops a boner or you’re in the mood

he also wants to experience holding you in his arms, filled with love and not lust, kisses that are just innocent instead of heated 

to wake up to your sleeping face, no matter how funny looking, in the morning instead of an cold, empty space in his bed

but lucas knows you won’t return his feelings so he does his best to hide them (read: fails miserably at hiding his feelings for you)

then you begin to notice subtle changes in his behavior 

he goes from choking you out w a dark look in his eyes to caressing your cheeks w heart eyes in 000.02 seconds

he gives you his shirt to keep even after you leave his apartment and insists on driving you home

he texts you pictures of cute puppies he saw on his way to college instead of his usual boxer pics 

safe to say, u knew wtf was up

but u didn’t want to sound conceited abt knowing lucas liked you, so you didn’t say anything

and you both kept up the facade of hiding your feelings for the other behind by taking your frustration out on each other, sexually

and it stays that way for a while, but lucas was becoming more agitated each night you left and vice versa

until he broke the unspoken rule

neither of you had stayed overnight at the others for fear of having to deal with the truth of your emotions in the morning

but that night as you lay beside him, breathing heavily, the thin covers barely covering your naked bodies, he slipped his hand into yours and pulled you close

and you both lay there for a while, content in each other embraces, listening to each others heartbeats

then, you shifted to move away, to leave another night of unspoken feelings for another day

but he pulled you back and whispered, “stay”

you knew what that meant, you thought it over in your head

if you stayed, you would wake up and finally face the music, finally talk about how much you’ve fallen for him

how much you want to give him kisses all over his face to make him laugh

how you want to go on cute little cafe dates and study dates and dinner dates and basically every kind of date with him

how you want to introduce him to your family as not just your friend, but your boyfriend, your lover

a few moments passed

lucas’ forehead creased slightly in worry

he placed a tender kiss on your knuckles

mumbled a soft “please”

you took a deep breath 

and relaxed against him, letting your eyelids flutter shut as you let sleep overcome you

missing how lucas’ eyes literally shone as he looked down on you

“finally” he whispered against the crown of your head as he placed a kiss there, his grin almost splitting his face in half

he sent a bunch of keyboard smashes into the nct gc later bc he was so happy sjdksjd

and thats how you and wong yukhei fell in love

he also still gets butterflies every time he sees you and screams internally every time u kiss him fucjskjd <33

le fin♡ 

this is my first bullet scenario, hope it was okay (〃▽〃)

85 statements tag

I was tagged by @narika-a (sorry i took this long to do this jgbjhg)

RULES: Answer these 85 statements about yourself then tag 20 people

LAST…?

1. Drink: water

2. Phone call: my mom

3. Text message: mul on vasta 14 tyyppii siinä (joist 4 tulee nex7ist lol) 

4. Song you listened: life is 82 by superbee

5. Time you cried: when a dog attacked my best friend

EVER…?

6. Dated someone twice: yes

7. Kissed someone and regret it: no

8. Been cheated on: no

9. Lost someone special: if my dog counts then yes

10. Been depressed: yes

11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: no

12. Favorite color: red!!!!

13. Favorite color: black

14. Favorite color: pink (very light pink)

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU…?

15. Made new friends: yes

16. Fallen out of love: no

17. Laughed until you cried: uhhh ofc lol

18. Found out someone was talking about you: yea

19. Met someone who changed you: no

20. Found out who your friends are: i know my closest friends too well already so no

21. Kissed someone on your Facebook friend list: i don’t even have facebook so no

GENERAL

22. How many of your Facebook friends you know irl: edelleenki i don’t have facebook

23. Do you have any pets: none atm :((

24. Do you want to change your name: nope

25. What did you do for your last birthday: watched movies with my friends

26. What time did you wake up today: around 10 am

27. What where you doing at midnight last night: searching pics of my cpop favs

28. What is something you can’t wait for: the 24k concert !!!!

29. Last time you saw your mother: yesterday

30. What are you listening to right now: my brother singing jealosy by monsta x

31. Have you ever talked to a Tom: no

32. Something that is getting on your nerves: idk

33. Most visited website: youtube and tumblr (sad.. ik)

34. Hair color: red (dyed)

35. Long or short hair: super short i lowkey hv a bowlcut rn

36. Do you have a crush on someone: yes lol

37. What do you like about yourself: i’m funny and creative

38. Want any piercing: yes (cheeks and bridge) but idk if i’ll ever get one

39. Blood type: idk

40. Nickname: uhh i have a lot of them fdgjg.. sad, larppi, sarppa, sarbababa, sare etc

41. Relationship status: -

42. Zodiac: scorpio

43. Pronouns: she/her

44. Favorite TV shows: the rain, ahs, sense8, mr. pickles, adventure time, ,,,, there’s more 

45. Tattoos: none (yet)

46. Right or Left handed: right

47. Ever had surgery: no

48. Piercings: two on ears

49. Sport: no ew

50. Countries you visited: Sweden, Estonia, Poland

51. Trainers: i have like 1 pair that i never use

MOST GENERAL

52. Eating: jajajajajjajajsjhjdhsf kalakeitto on parasta.. mä kerran itkin ku mä söin sitä

53. Drinks: water, aloe vera drinks, cola etc

54. I’m about to watch: idol producer

55. Waiting: for 24k’s concert

56. Want: some peace damnit

57. Get married: maybe in the future if i find the right woman

58. Career:  i’m studying to be a practical nurse rn but i’m interested in working with inmates

WHICH IS BETTER

59. Hugs or Kisses: hugs!!!

60. Eyes or lips: eyes!

61. Shorter or taller: both but maybe shorter ??

62. Older or younger: both

63. Nice arms or stomach: arms!! i really couldn’t care less for abs. i do love soft tummies tho.

64. Hookup or relationship: both  lol

65. Troublemaker or hesitant: ... troublemaker (yikes)

HAVE YOU EVER

66. Kissed a stranger: no

67. Drank hard liquor: no

68. Turned someone down: no

69. Lost glasses: no but i don’t even have any glasses

70. Sex on first day: no

71. Broken someone’s heart: i might’ve but idk

72. Had your heart broken: no

73. Been arrested: no

74. Cried when someone died: yes

75. Fallen for friend: idk maybe?? feelings are complicated

DO YOU BELIEVE IN…?

76. Do you believe in yourself: yes woop

77. Love at first sight: mmmmmm idk

78. Santa Claus: no but yall need to accept that SANTA LIVES IN FINLAND

79. Miracles: mmmmmmmm mmmmm no

80. Angels: mmmmmmmmmmm maybe

OTHER

82. Best friend name: Jenni and Sara

83. Eye colour: blue/gray

84. Favourite movie: the 400 blows (i have like 500000000000 fav movies... but if i had to pick one ...)

85. Favourite actor/actress: Al Pacino ( i have many more....)

okay... i’m not gonna tag anyone this time

oh yeah i went on vacation to jamaica, it was fun and very warm. but as soon as i came back ive been sick hopefully its not covid…. just waiting on the results. honestly just the consequences of my own actions.

ooh that sounds fun, i had plans to go to ny but i cancelled those just in case and mainly bc of whats going on up there.

question of the day.

who would cast in a movie if you were the main character ie: best friend, main love interest and back up love interest or enemy and why?

dumb

i am wishing on all stars in the sky rn that you don’t have covid ahhhh but also consequence of your own actions???? there’s a story there lol 👀

oh i’m sorry you ha d to cancel your plans :(( but a good chill new years at home is also super fun tbh!!! and (depending if you drink alcohol or not) you’re already at home and don’t have to wake up somewhere strange and you can just stay in bed all day ahaahahha

oh my o h my i am v wine drunk answering this but hmmmm love interest is obviously mr tyson loml jost mhm no explanation needed mhmmmm best friend either beau or ilya purely bc they give such great best friend vibes like it’s just THERE. enemy would be tz46 bc i wanna fight him lowkey i think he’d be perfect to fight

➧ 85 questions

tagged by: @jencto ty my love! ♡

rules: answer these 85 statements about yourself, then tag 20 people @ohdaddy-nct @dcyoungs @rxnjuns @reunjun @angelita-gordita @taeybear @taezhu @lycheechann and all who wants to do!! (only if u want too bbs)

↳ Last…?

1. drink ─ hot burning coffee that i almost spilled while driving to class bc it’s pouring outside

2. phone call ─ laura (my friend who just graduated high school !!)

3. text message ─ my mom (telling me to drive safe in the rain uwu) 

4. song you listened to ─ jump by shinee (the album = a whole ass bop) 

5. time you cried ─ oof i cry for the lamest and dumbest reasons but last night i was looking at nct fanart and i saw a cute ass noren one where jeno was dressed in a big moomin costume and wished renjun a good day w/ a ballon and it was all hella cute and shit lemme find it i rb on my personal (THIS ONE) it was,, so cute,, i actually cried,, 

↳ Ever…?

6. dated someone twice ─ oof i rarely date let alone the same person twice lmao yikes

7. kissed someone and regretted it ─ i kissed this huge asshole in high school for a dare and he wouldn’t stop saying we had sex for a whole ass week,, this is why i dont date

8. been cheated on ─ nope

9. lost someone special ─ yeah but that’s the circle of life i guess :(

10. been depressed ─ oof did you mean: my four years of high school 

11. gotten drunk and thrown up ─ uhh psh no i don’t drink underaged,,, mhm

12. fave colors ─ WARM TONES!! nudes (skin colors), maroon/burgendy (just like a dark bloody red), rose gold/dusty pink (the light shade of pink but not pastel), black (just bc), royal blue (the only cool toned color i like idhhdh) 

↳ In the last year have you…

15. made new friends ─ yO making new friends is my middle name (i love making new friends !!) 

16. fallen out of love ─ i’ve never BEEN in love... 

17. laughed until you cried ─ if it’s after midnight, anything will make me laugh and cry (also i laugh at everything so yes)

18. found out someone was talking about you ─ lmao hell yeah high school drama everyone was out for me bc i look like a bitch and people are so quick to judge ://

19. met someone who changed you ─ umm not really everyone’s pretty chill. my roommate, who’s also like my best friend, is a huge party addict so she brings me to many parties, so i guess i’m more out there ? idk moving on 

20. found out who your friends are ─ literally once i graduated high school and went to college, all of the snakes just left and now i’m surrounded by my real friends uwu :^] why tf is everything related to high school i don't wanna remember that

21. kissed someone on your facebook friends list ─ bruh i only have facebook so i can get extra rewards on iphone games ksjkdj 

↳ General

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know irl ─ refer to #21

23. do you have any pets ─ i, myself, don’t have one bc i live in a dorm, but back at home, i have a doggo. she’s a thai ridgeback and her name is 巧克力 (qiao ke li = chocolate) and i miss her vv much :’))

24. do you want to change your name ─ for the most part no, i like my name, but when people call me ‘ran-you’ or something of the sort, i question why i live in america

25. what did you do for your last birthday ─ i traveled around china alone (well with my two friends back in china) without my parents for the first time bc i was an Adult™ now

26. what time did you wake up today ─ i was supposed to wake up at 8am but i didn't roll out of bed until 8:30am but hey, i made it to my 9am class 10 minutes early somehow

27. what were you doing at midnight last night ─ looking at nct fanart on tumblr and wishing that i coud draw/paint like that :’))

28. what is something you can’t wait for ─ my trip to spain!! i’m traveling to spain for 2 weeks with my friend at the end of june to july and i’m so excited bc i haven’t hung out w/ him in forever

30. what are you listening to right now ─ i’m in my accounting 2 class rn,,, so my professor lecturing about debits and credits (yes i know i should be paying attention but i’m an independent learner so i prefer reading the textbook and taking notes,, i’m just here bc attendance is graded)

31. have you ever talked to a person named tom ─ my old high school teacher whose first lecture was about corn and how it’s in EVERYTHING that is mass- produced today,,, well his full name is actually thomas

32. something that’s getting on your nerves ─ it was raining as i was walking to class and even though i had an umbrella, somehow my pants are still all drenched and this lecture room is SO DAMN COLD and i’m shivering someone save ME

33. most visited website ─ my school website lol

34. hair colour ─ jet black but in the sun it turns reddish brown ?

35. long or short hair ─ super long, it reaches my waist lol 

36. do you have a crush on someone ─ does renjun count? jk kinda ?? but not really bc,, idk dating doesn’t really act as a major objective for me right now

37. what do you like about yourself ─ friendliness and outgoingness ?

38. want any piercings? ─ oof i already have a lot but i want more yes (i have 3 on both my lobes, 1 on my both cartilages, and on my right ear i have a snug ? is that what it’s called idk) lowkey highkey i wanna pierce my nose but we’ll see

39. blood type ─ o 

40. nicknames ─ all nicknames i’ve ever gotten: ren, renu (my baby cousin calls me that bc she can barely pronounce words), fish..., nyu, rennie, r, human fish, + many puns on my name

41. relationship status ─ single and tired

42. zodiac ─ scorpio 

43. pronouns ─ she/her

44. fave tv shows ─ the office, black mirror, we bare bears, law and order,  futurama, stranger things, bob’s burgers, bate’s motel, american horror story (i love the duality between cartoons and fucked up shows dsdkjh) 

45. tattoos ─ i want ones !! (prob small in hidden places) but um maybe once i graduate undergrad at least 

46. right or left handed ─ right handed

47. ever had surgery ─ no - kinda? i have a scar on my eyelid bc when i was like 3-4 y/o, i was playing hide and seek w/ my uncle and cousin in china and i was running around and i turned quickly around a counter the same height as me and the corner of the counter cut open my eyelid,, this is kinda tmi but i was so stunned bc blood was running literally out of my eye so i didn’t even cry, i just stood there like ‘oh...that’s a lot of blood...’ i went to the ER to get it stitched up but idk if that counts as surgery :p

48. piercings ─ refer to #38 

49. sport ─ currently i play volleyball and basketball for club, but played a lot in high school too

50. vacation ─ anywhere i love traveling !! also east asian,, mostly just china i miss my friends and family :’))

51. trainers ─ ?? uhh as in shoes? or the gym? idk,,

↳ More general

52. eating ─ as in what i ate today? if so, a bagel and a boiled egg for breakfast

53. drinking ─ coffee that’s now cold rip

54. i’m about to watch ─ uhh my professor continue talking about accounting and economics 

55. waiting for ─ this class to end so i can eat lunch 

56. want ─ a change of pants bc i’M WET AND COLD 

57. get married ─ i sure hope so

58. career ─ i want to start and own a fashion brand/company/line (i’m double majoring in international business and trade + leadership management right now)

↳ Which is better

59. hugs or kisses ─ both i just want affection ;((

60. lips or eyes ─ these are hard to pick but eyes !

61. shorter or taller ─ taller even though i’m pretty tall as it is 

62. older or younger ─ older or the same age ? (rip sorry renjun) 

63. nice arms or stomach ─ arms? i need you to be able to put me in a chokehold and KO me (not in a kinky way,,, maybe,,,)

64. hookup or relationship ─ relationship duh ?

65. troublemaker or hesitant ─ team too-lazy-to-be-either

↳ Have you ever

66. kissed a stranger ─ uhh prob not

67. drank hard liquor ─ no officer i don’t drink underaged mhm

68. lost glasses ─ i literally have like 6 pairs of glasses that i keep thinking i’ve lost but then find it again 

69. turned someone down ─ oof yeah sorry 

70. sex on first date ─ no i have standards 

71. broken someone’s heart ─ i hope not ! at least not intentionally  

72. had your heart broken ─ prob once or twice 

73. been arrested ─ in my good christian household?! (i’m not even christian tf)

74. cried when someone died ─ well of course i have a heart

75. fallen for a friend ─ all my friends are hot as fuck no lie

↳ Do you believe in…?

76. yourself ─ always :D !!

77. miracles ─ eh,,

78. love at first sight ─ maybe not LOVE but something similar

79. santa claus ─ i-is he not real... (i’m kidding dbksj)

80. kiss on a first date ─ sure why not

81. angels ─ renjun is a walking angel on earth

↳ Other

82. best friend’s name ─ vincent, alyssa (my two fave people) 

83. eye colour ─ dark poop brown

84. fave movie ─ i watch too many to have 1 favorite but for the sake of this tag, i’ll say coraline 

85. fave actor ─ i have a big gay crush on dilraba dilmurat also tom holland 

el fin

a tag my dudes

oi i was @shawnsmercy and @for-my-mind so thank you guys!

rules - answer these 85 questions and tag 20 people.

- what was your last...

1) drink - water

2) phone call - my friend annette

3) text message - asking a friend about the ap human geo homework hehe

4) song you listened to - sHe by zayn

5) time you cried - last night lmao

- have you ever...

6) dated someone twice? - plenty of times

7) kissed someone and regretted it? actually yeah it was pretty bad, we went for different kisses (yikes)

8) been cheated on? - nope

9) lost someone special? - yeah

10) been depressed? only mildly, now all i harbour is frustration and stress oops

11) gotten drunk and thrown up? - i mean i had like a shot and a half of straight vodka and that was my first and only time drinking alcohol and i was slightly buzzed and got a massive headache and my stomach was not handling it well and i did almost throw up but i didn’t! yeah, never again. dark times, dark times.

- fave colours

12) pale yellow/blue

13) iridescent

14) black, grey n white (you can never go wrong with ‘em!)

- in the last year have you...

15) made new friends? - actually yeah i have

16) fallen out of love? - yes ma���am

17) laughed until you cried? - it’s a daily thing

18) found out someone was talking about you? - yeah but it actually wasn’t in a bad way this time which makes me feel real good :)

19) met someone who changed you? - yeah

20) found out who your friends are?-  i mean i’ve been known who my friends are and the new friends i've made haven’t surprised me with anything crazy about them so i guess not

21) kissed someone on your facebook friends list? - oof people still use facebook?

22) how many of your facebook friends do you know irl? - i. don’t. use. that. shit.

23) do you have any pets? - YES AND HE’S A DOG AND I LOVE HIM WITH ALL MY HEART HES SO CURLY AND SOFT AND LOVELY

24) do you want to change your name? - eh, nah

25) what did you do for your last birthday? - we hung out at the pool n ate n shit

26) what time did you wake up today? 7am. thanks school, you fucker

27) what were you doing at midnight last night? - homework oops

28) what is something you can’t wait for? - for these stupid stitches to dissolve, for school to be over, for my summer australia trip, and for the niall horan concert in september

29) what is your favourite animal? - doggos (its basic and i really don’t care)

30) what are you listening to rn? - there for you by troye sivan (my boiiii)

31) have you ever talked to a person named tom? - uh, i think so

32) something that’s getting on your nerves - how much i procrastinate and these fucking stitches

33) most visited website - probably youtube

34) hair colour - dark brown, yes, DARK brown

35) long or short hair? - eh it's kinda short-medium 

36) do you have a crush on someone? - a big fat one

37) what do you like about yourself? - that i can make people laugh or smile or feel good about themselves and i also like my curly hair and ability to do eyebrows (ayeee)

38) want any piercings? - no more for now

39) blood type - oof i’ve never been told what mine is

40) nicknames - mimi, mandy, panda (my mom and brother call me panda just to piss me off lol)

41) relationship status - single but crushing real hard

42) sign - gemini, bitch

43) pronouns - she/her i guess but whatever you want is fine with me tbh

44) fave tv show - probably the vampire diaries or drake and josh or zoey 101

45) tattoos - not of legal age yet but i have 11 tattoo ideas saved on my phone so far so best believe my fast ass will be seated in that parlour chair when i’m 18

46) right or left handed - i’m actually ambidexterous

47) ever had a surgery? - literally had one earlier today

48) piercings - i’ve got the standard ear lobe piercings and a helix in my right ear

49) sport - swimming yUh fuck land sports

50) vacation - aUsTrAlIa (ah that looks so weird)

51) trainers - converse or adidas

- more general

52) eating - my stomach actually just started growling probably because i ate fucking ice cream for dinner and a quick jell-o snack bc of this fucking mouth surgery

53) drinking - i lOve lemonade im a lemonade hoe but i only fuck with that good juicy lemonade not that watered down shit oh and i also really love iced coffee but water’s good too

54) i’m about to watch - my grades plummet and my school year be ruined bc im doing this instead of homework and its 2am and now im freaking out bc i didnt even realise it was 2am friCk

55) waiting for - this shit to heal so i can use my upper lip properly and eat

56) want - harry styles tickets i mean he’s literally coming to a venue about 20 minutes from my house ON MY BIRTHDAY but there are literally no good seats left at a price i can afford and for school to end *deep SIGH*

57) get married - ???

58) career - i’m currently looking into the tech industry and being a software engineer or web developer or lowkey an actress or an internet personality but lord knows what my indecisive gemini ass is gonna wanna be next year

59) hugs or kisses - hugs are more comfortable

60) lips or eyes - the eyes are where it’s at

61) taller or shorter - i’m not sure what this is asking but i’m average height ?? idk but i’m 5′4 and i prefer taller but if your short i still really really love you plus my crush is really short and she’s the cutest thing ever

62) older or younger - i’m just now realising the previous question was about preference which i did answer but i also added some unneccesary detail and now im too lazy to change it but not lazy to type an also unnecessary paragraph anyway i prefer my guys older and my girls can be either i really don’t mind

63) nice arms or stomach - i really don’t care you can have both, one, or neither but none of that really matters if your personality’s shit

64) hookups or relationships - relationships

65) troublemaker or hesitant - i’m kinda both sometimes i’m hesitant and overthink a situation and end up getting myself into trouble anyway it’s stupid and doesn’t make sense but it happens

66) kissed a stranger - heck no

67) drank hard liquor - ye buddy and it wasn’t good

68) turned someone down - yup

69) sex on first date - haha i see what you did there, number 69. but no i’m still a virgin wassup

70) broken someone’s heart - god i hope not but i think i have

71) had your heart broken - that’s its current condition

72) been arrested - nope

73) cried when someone died - i’d be concerned if i didn’t

74) fallen for a friend - it’s the current news

- do you believe in

75) yourself - i don’t know, do i?

76) miracles - i really don’t know, maybe?

77) love at first sight - eh yeah

78) sanata claus - is this some kind of joke

79) angels - harry styles wants me to believe otherwise and i mean when i look at her i definitely see what you mean mr. styles

80) eye colour - brown but i got green contacts to spice it up a bit (they’re prescription though bc i’m blind as fuck)

81) best friends’ name - bianca, kaylyn, allison, and ashadé

82) favourite movie - the outsiders, grease, dunkirk (i mean), everything, everything, and love simon (oh and the 1d this is us movie even though i never saw it but 1d’s in it so it’s automatically good also remember harry in dunkirk?)

83) favourite actor - HARRY STYLES (im biased oops), amandla stenberg, nick robinson, ralph macchio, tom holland, zendaya, ian somerhalder, and katherine langford (i literally just spewed a bunch of names from movies i love oh well)

84) favourite cartoon - tom and jerry bc im real like that, the amazing world of gumball, steven universe, and we bare bears

85) favourite teacher’s name - uh, what

i don’t know 20 people so ima just tag some people off the top of my head, sorry if you were already tagged: @illumilitt @shawnmcuddles @shawnssweatshirt @pattinsonshawn and anyone else who wants to do it :)