if i made an smau story would you guys read it ?? cus i see them all over and they’re always so cute i wanna make one

Guys I love. Japanese Breakfast

I drew this before it was so shiover 😞

Anyways soft sounds from another Planet X tomshiv

this fucking song

soft sounds from another planet is an absolute masterpiece

Japanese Breakfast's Browser Game Japanese Breakquest ending

“I can't get you off my mind

I can't get you off in general

So here we are, we're just two losers

I want you, and you want something more beautiful,”

CW: Blood, animal skull Drew this ages ago but never got round to posting it, here's a tribute to Japanese Breakfast's incredible Roadhead music video

//

I can't get you off my mind

I can't get you off in general

So here we are, we're just two losers

I want you, and you want something more beautiful

// ❀ ❀ ❀

luke and saturn are litr summertime sadness x i wanna be yours LIKE OMGMYMTMGMRJEN

saturn is summertime sadness because duh?? things are bad all year but even worse during the summer because she has to be home all day so summertime sadness obviously.

and luke is i wanna be yours because even tho saturn didn’t realize it/reciprocate it immediately, he was in love with her the minute they met, without even having to talk to her 🥹

ugh my babies i love them so much (thank you to a random tiktok mash up that gave me this idea😫)

my pretty baby 😍

An ethereal rich, slowed and heavily reverbed rendition of one of my favorite songs and the first track that I've had the pleasure of hearing from by JBrekkie. Enjoy!

///////////@;::

We aren’t bound by law We aren’t bound by anything at all Just youㅤ If you decide to show Just if you decide to show up on time

Why walk when you can show up on time? Why walk when you can show up on time? On time On time On time

All of my devotion turns violent

Boyish, Japanese Breakfast

I am thoroughly enjoy Michelle Zauner's book Crying In H Mart. So I am kicking off the weekend with Japanese Breakfast and the opening track from the wonderful album Soft Sounds From Another Planet.

January 7, 2023

The 7th Day of 2023

-Dear God, dear God, dear God

I’m sat upon the kitchen bench with my back against the wall, I’m not a child anymore but there’s something comforting about sitting as if I am. This year hasn’t begun how I anticipated it would. I’m feeling a whole lot and very little at the same time. Today grocery shopping didn’t have its usual therapeutic appeal and even though I found peace in cooking I thought writing might help process things. So as “Soft Sounds from Another Planet”  by Japanese Breakfast echoes through the kitchen I’ll reflect. Somehow lately every year has started the same, "Vulnicura" by Björk. 

Love will keep us safe from death.

I saw Abby this week, we got all dressed up just to sit in a carpark and eat takeout. Typical. I’m worried about Taliah, like me she hurts herself in helping others. I’m trying my best to be here for her but a voice in my head assures me I’m not good enough at this. I showed her Sisyphus 55’s newest video “do you want to be loved or do you want to be yourself?” Based on the title, I wasn’t sure this video would mean a whole lot to me, but it really resonated. The parts on Gabor Maté’s take on Type C Personalities and how they’re fabricated in childhood especially stuck with me. I’ve been thinking about Harrison again, this isn’t inherently bad, but I had hoped my feelings for him would subside in the new year. I guess I should’ve known that wouldn’t be the case. Time isn’t real and I’m not capable of forgetting my feelings at the moment. I’m left hung up like my clothes in the wind that ended up in the dirt. 

I also saw Eric this week. I find him sweet, intuitive and inquisitive. These are all traits I admire, and at any other point in my life, I’d be absolutely head over heels for him. I suppose taking things slow for once could be a positive thing. I really do like him but I hope to like him some more soon. Anyways, we got dinner and were interviewed on the street. We walked and we sat in a park too. Up until now, we’ve been fairly platonic though our closeness this time is memorable. At some point we swapped jackets and at another, we held each other in the middle of the square for the whole world to see. He keeps on telling me I have a humanitarian superpower within, I’m not quite sure what he means by this but so far he’s done well reading me. Speaking of guys I should be in love with by now, Julian texted me. He hadn’t replied to me because his Australian number is no longer in service. He says he has stories to tell me and that he’s not enjoying Indonesia too much at the moment. I weirdly, really look forward to seeing him again in February, I tend to listen to his stories like they’re a book. Also, I imagine solid company, sex and weed will do wonders for me. 

I should really read a book this month. I’ve been listening to “BURN TO ASHES” by Backxwash at nauseam again. It’s really become one of my favourite songs of all time. Verse 2 always hits me like it’s a freight train. I had the honour of seeing Remi Wolf perform at The Forum, on the day of I hadn’t eaten so I was in pain but it all went away once she stepped on stage. She is very easily one of the most excitable and talented performers I’ve witnessed in person. At the show, I met a mysterious character whose name I can’t recall at the moment. She’s here from the Philippines, visiting her sister. I found her aura to be interesting. That night I got off the train and danced the whole way home. Mum was asleep but I kissed her on the forehead goodnight and continued dancing as I got ready for bed. Kobe watched on confused. I felt so happy in that moment. Afterwards, I didn’t sleep, Alex and I played PlayStation until 6 in the morning. Some things never change. 

I also got to see Shygirl this week. It was fucking incredible. During “Coochie (a bedtime story)” the crowd transcended sound itself we were so loud. I really love music venues that are underground, there’s no reception so it allows everybody to be there and nowhere else. Despite how important this night was to me, it didn’t come without the lingering of darker feelings. I went alone but really wanted to make friends there. I know it’s trivial but as well as having the desire to meet people I felt superbly introverted too, I wanted to make friends but not to be the one to initiate it. I left without any new friends. Oh, to be approachable. In the midst of the show I was on top of the world but my surroundings soon got the best of me. Post gig I walked along the river solemnly as if I was in a shitty movie. Drunk people make me dearly uncomfortable. For me, queer-dominated spaces seem to only incite indescribable loneliness. I hate that this happens, I guess I feel as if amongst these people I should fit in but I always seem to be just as out of place as ever. If I don’t belong in the settings meant for me to belong where do I? I felt disillusioned but found peace and camaraderie in an unusual place: Skateboarders who were too young to be out that late. I’m not sure why they approached me or how meeting them in that brief moment has stuck with me but I’m glad it happened. To witness the innocence of youth, to see their rebellion, to understand that freedom, everyone else in our carriage seemed bothered by it but I just hope the kid was finally able to snap his board. Also, I may have somehow made a friend who attended Shygirl, just not how I thought I would. The guy who stood beside me at the show and in line has been messaging me. He seems interesting, I wonder where this will go.