#so he sang alone. until edward caught him one day. and to help him feel less ashamed Edward sung duets with him ever since. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

captainseaweedbrains · 4 years

Text

The Dance of the Color Guard, Op. 64 Ch. 3

Everlark meets marching band meets enemies to friends to lovers.

Tumblr: X X X

Read on Ao3: X X X

May

There wasn’t a single childhood memory Katniss could pull that didn’t involve Peeta Mellark. Try as she might to ever forget they were friends—and she tried her hardest to forget—it was next to impossible. Peeta and her were, once upon a time, inseparable. Glued at the hip. Her parents used to tease that only the moonlight could separate them and even then, in the summertime, Peeta spent many nights sleeping on the living room floor next to her, giggling as they watched movies and ate popcorn, Prim snoring beside them.

And then with her dad being an avid photographer, there were boxes of family albums documenting Katniss and Prim growing up throughout the years. From first steps to bath times together to dance and music recitals—her dad documented it all. “For future biographers,” he used to joke whenever Katniss would complain why they always had to take a picture of everything. She’d roll her eyes in response and just let him snap away. There was no stopping the man. Now she wished she could take back all her tweenage-angst and let him take as many photos as he wanted of her. But she didn’t know what she knew now. Thus was life.

On the rare occasion when he relented with the camera and accepted that she was not going to cooperate with any poses he suggested, Peeta was more than happy to step in and take her place, joking how his many admirers at school would kill for a candid photo of him. “It’s not candid if you’re posing, stupid,” she used to tell him, but he’d kindly tell her to shut her piehole and offer up suggestions on where to take the picture next, her dad eating Peeta’s enjoyment up with each click of the shutter.

Peeta was in a lot of her family photos. It was impossible to flip through any family album after Katniss had turned three and not find him. Due to his parents constantly working at their family bakery turned mini corporation, Peeta and his older brother Rye were often left to fend for themselves and from early morning until sundown, Rye would kick Peeta out of the house and lock the door. Rye’s dickish behavior was actually how the two met—Katniss hearing Peeta screaming across their yard, asking if he was dying because he was crying by his back door, fists slamming the glass.

“No,” he sniffed, rubbing his puffy red eyes. “My brudder—l-l-locked—me—o-o- ooout!” Peeta hiccupped, his hysteria growing with each syllable until he was back to crying for Rye to let him in.

“My daddy’s makin’ pancakes,” Katniss offered from her deck. “He makes them with funny faces and makes them sing. Want some?”

There probably should have been some type of introduction between them before Katniss invited this total stranger into her home, but when Peeta came in with her, her dad just smiled and told him to pull up a chair. Names were finally exchanged over gooey chocolate chip pancakes and they became instant friends.

After that, instead of crying when Rye would inevitably lock him out of his own home, Peeta would cross over to the Everdeen’s yard and walk on in, shouting out his greetings to whoever was in the kitchen at the time and seeing what she or her dad were up to for the day. There were countless memories of Katniss coming downstairs after playing with Prim and finding Peeta and her dad casually working together on the morning crossword puzzle at the kitchen table, or out in her mother’s garden doing yard work and chatting about everything and anything. He was always there, ready to hang out and see what she had in mind for them to do that day, and their photo albums showed it. Birthday parties, family dinners, sleepovers, holidays—there Peeta was, all smiles and dimples.

Peeta Mellark was a huge fixture in the Everdeen household until one day he just wasn’t. One day he was there, making her laugh so hard, milk came out her nose, and the next, he was gone and those boxes of happy family photos were just sad reminders of what used to be.

No dad.

No best friend.

It was fine. She was fine.

Except maybe she wasn’t? It annoyed her that Peeta could still dig under her skin like that, his words in the locker room playing on repeat in her mind. At least her nerves about tryouts had a chance to calm down between stressing about Abernathy’s mocking jabs about her playing and her annoyance at Peeta thinking her a heartless loner. So what if she preferred to do things alone? It meant she was independent, mature for her young age. Was that such a bad thing?

And what was up with accusing her of not being there for people? Not caring for them? Did she have to remind him that he made his choice and ditched her ? That the second her dad died, he split? Was he ever really her friend, or was he just using her to get to her dad because his dad wasn’t around? Katniss had been wondering that for years, but didn’t have the courage to ask because she just knew if she did, she’d start to cry and shout at him and maybe shove him a bit and he and his stupid friends would laugh and probably call her a psychopath bitch.

What a fucking hypocrite Peeta Mellark was, calling her heartless when he was guilty of so much worse.

The final bell rang at last, freeing everyone for the day. Katniss was so caught up in her anger over Peeta and Mr. Abernathy and really, just everyone at this point, that she almost forgot about the call sheet posting. Almost. As soon as Madge reminded her, asking if she wanted to walk over there with her and Gale, all those nerves resurfaced as they headed over to the band room. She kept discreetly wiping her sweaty palms on her jeans, preparing herself to be disappointed, to expect someone like Glimmer to get it, but please, whoever was listening up there, please let her have made captain. If this crappy hellish day could give her just one thing, let it be that.

“I can’t look,” Katniss panicked when she saw the neon pink sign taped to the window connecting to the band office, halting in her steps. “If I didn’t make captain, I don’t know what I’ll do. Punch something?”

Madge rolled her eyes and offered to check for her. “If Trinket didn’t make you captain, she clearly tripped in those heels and is suffering from some head trauma. Let’s see.” Her manicured finger scrolled down the long list of names until stopping on the Es. “Hm. Katniss, I don’t see your name on here at all.”

Her heart jolted. “What? That can’t be.” She wasn’t positive on being captain, but she was positive she’d at least make the team . Were the theatre and dance kids really that much better? She shoved Gale and Madge aside, looking for her name. Abrams...Banks...Carroll...Daly...Edwards...Evans... Everdeen! And there was an asterisk next to her name! She was captain of next season’s color guard!

“You asshole!” she laughed, shoving Madge in the shoulder. “I’m captain!” She couldn’t help the large smile stretching across her face. She was captain!

“You are!” Madge cheered, giving her a big tight hug. “Congratulations, Katniss! I’m so proud of you!”

“Totally not surprised,” Gale said, messing up her hair in a brotherly fashion. She shoved his hand away and gave a playful glare. “And what about my favorite guard member?” he asked, looking down at Madge. “Did you make it, too?”

Madge gave him a sweet smile and looked further down the list before pumping her fists in excitement. “I did! I made it! Take that Shelly Shoemon from 4th grade for saying I had the coordination skills of a cow!”

“Totally not surprised,” Gale said again, laughing as he pulled his girlfriend in for a kiss. They locked lips for a while before Katniss cleared her throat and suggested they get a room if they wanted to continue. The couple smiled, Madge’s freckled cheeks tinted pink, but broke apart, their hands remaining clasped together.

“Should we head over to Sae’s for burgers and ice cream to celebrate?” Gale suggested. “Thom just paid me for fixing his car, so I have the cash to spend.” Both girls happily agreed to his suggestion, excited to share the news with Sae, the diner’s owner and local grandmother to anyone under the age of 40. Good news didn’t feel real until sharing it with Sae.

“Katniss,” Miss Trinket shouted from somewhere in her office, “is that you?” Her head popped out the doorway, startling the three. “Excellent, dear! I’ve been waiting to speak with you about something. Come in! Come in!” Her hand motioned for her to follow.

“Oh.” Katniss looked over at Gale and Madge, unsure what to say. “Am I in trouble?”

Miss Trinket laughed. “No, not at all! I just need to discuss some color guard things with my new captain.” She sang the last word, putting great emphasis on the middle consonants, and glared behind her at, presumably, Mr. Abernathy who probably said something rude in a remark.

“Sure, yeah,” Katniss said, feeling a bit dumb. Of course Miss Trinket wanted to jump right into the thick of things. The woman was the Energizer Bunny on crack when it came to choreography and scheduling. Of course she’d want to talk to her captain about the game plan and how she expected they execute it. “I’m free to talk.” Miss Trinket smiled and stepped back in her office.

Katniss turned to Madge and Gale, wearing an apologetic smile . “I’ll meet you at Sae’s?” They nodded, not minding the wait, and wished her luck, telling her to text when she was leaving school.

*********

The first thing Katniss noticed amiss when stepping into the adjoined office was Peeta Mellark casually sitting there in front of Mr. Abernathy’s desk, flipping through a pile of sheet music. It wasn’t unusual for band students to volunteer time helping the surly man try to keep the band program organized, but it seemed a little late for a volunteer to still be in here. Abernathy and Trinket were a lot to take and only bearable in small, manageable doses. Most booked it the second the bell rang.

She paused in the doorway, unsure if she misunderstood Miss Trinket. She meant for them to talk now, right? So what was Peeta doing here?

“Ah, Katniss,” Miss Trinket said, sifting through a stack of notes, not noticing her hesitation. “Take a seat, please.” She motioned to the wooden chair in front of her desk.

Still unsure what was going on, Katniss gingerly sat down in the offered chair, her bag in her lap, and waited to see what exactly Miss Trinket wanted to talk about with Peeta still here. Guard stuff wasn’t technically private, but it’s not like it was riveting information either. Something didn’t feel right here.

Miss Trinket cleared her throat, catching Katniss’ attention from not looking at Peeta, and folded her hands on top of her desk with a bright, fluorescent smile. “Katniss, I want to be the first to congratulate you on a job well done. Your audition was truly inspiring. Honestly, I wish I could have taped it to show future guard members what true dedication looks like.” Katniss’ cheeks darkened at her director’s lavish compliments.

“Thank you, Miss Trinket,” she said quietly, feeling a tad uncomfortable being told this in front of Peeta and Mr. Abernathy. “I tried my hardest.”

“And it shows, dear. It truly shows.” The assistant director looked down at her notes, reading from one of the piles she was sifting through earlier, her long fingernails idly tapping the top metal surface in thought. “In fact,” she said, “I was so impressed with your audition, I’ve decided to make you a very prominent figure in this season’s show. The show’s leading star, as it were.”

“I’m—um. What?” And then Miss Trinket proceeded to happily explain her vision for how their band was going to tell the tragic tale of Romeo and Juliet, with the occasional grunts from Mr. Abernathy here and there. She explained how she envisioned the houses being represented by the color guard and drumline, feuding together on the field as the music from the band crescendos to the climatic finish.

“Next to you, Katniss,” Miss Trinket said, holding up what looked like a handwritten list of names, “I haven’t quite decided who will play who for color guard, but we have time to iron out these details, dear. What concerns me is how long it is taking Boggs to decide who made it for drumline.” Her eyes slitted at Abernathy. “It seems someone forgot to pass along the deadline I imposed so we could avoid this exact problem.” Mr. Abernathy just gave a noncommittal shrug and continued flipping through the scorebook he was looking at. Miss Trinket rubbed at the corner of her eyes and gave Katniss an exasperated look before continuing on.

“It took some wheedling to get him to bend to my will, but I do believe many of our seasonal veterans are returning to drumline this year, Peeta being one of them.” She smiled warmly at the boy. For someone finding out good news, Peeta looked bored out of his mind sitting there, listening as Miss Trinket prattled on about visions and forbidden love and what this will mean for the band come competition season.

This all felt like a lot. Like a lot a lot.

“So let me get this straight,” Katniss said slowly, trying to process it all and not throw up like her stomach wanted. “You want me to be Juliet? Like the Juliet who falls in love and dies at the end? That Juliet?”

If it was at all possible, Miss Trinket’s smile grew, making Katniss feel even sicker. “The very one, my dear! Oh, Katniss, I cannot tell you how thrilled I am to have you as our Juliet. I’ve had my guesses who you’d play for a while now, since I decided we should do Romeo & Juliet a few months back, really.” Mr. Abernathy snorted at that but said nothing to contradict her. “But now, after seeing how much you’ve improved since last season? Truly inspiring! And with your tiny frame, I think we can finally bring air flips into the mix now! Wouldn’t that look amazing under stadium lights?”

Katniss really felt like she was going to be sick now. “You want me to be a spotlight guard?” Her voice sounded a bit squeaky to her ears. “But that’s—I’ve never been a spotlight guard before! Especially not something to that kind of scale. They’re, like, really important. Like judges judging them important.”

It was Peeta’s turn to laugh next to her, trying to cover it up with a cough when she turned to glare at him. Why was he here?

Katniss took a deep breath in to try and quiet the loud ringing noise suddenly blaring in her ears. She was clearly not making a first good impression as captain, but this was so unexpected! Miss Trinket had never had her be a spotlight before. Ever. It was one thing being captain, but this, having her performance carry the entire story? Yeah, no thanks.

“Are you sure you want it to be me?” she asked, her voice a lot calmer than she felt. “I was thinking you’d want someone like Madge—or Glimmer—for something this important. You’re always saying how swan-like Glimmer is on the field. Don’t you want Juliet to look like a swan?”

“Told you she wouldn’t be for it,” Peeta muttered next to her, a knowing smile on his face as he shook his head in amusement. Oh, he just thought he knew everything about her, didn’t he? Like he was some Katniss Everdeen expert.

“Why are you even here?” she finally asked him. “This clearly has nothing to do with you. Can’t you file music somewhere else?”

“Isn’t it a bit obvious why I’m here, Katniss?” he asked her incredulously, leaning back in his chair, arms crossed. “I thought you were more observant than this.”

Before she could reply, Miss Trinket held her hands up. “Enough! Peeta, I’ll kindly ask you to please sit there quietly, as we discussed.” Discussed? When did they have time to discuss this? Then she remembered earlier. Miss Trinket needing to speak with Peeta, breaking up their argument. They were discussing her? Why did Peeta have to know that Miss Trinket wanted her as Juliet. She was clearly missing something obvious, like Peeta said, but her mind was shot. Barely able to process anything anymore as her anxiety kicked into gear.

“And, Katniss.” She looked up at the sound of her name. “Please keep an open mind about this. I understand to some, being a lead is scary, but trust me when I say, I have my absolute faith in you.

“Madge and Glimmer are talented girls, yes,” Miss Trinket explained, “but I’m afraid they are too tall for what I have in mind for choreography. You know how important these things can be. We need someone petite like you, Katniss. Someone Peeta can easily pick up and twirl without fear of dropping.” She motioned a manicured hand at Peeta, his face staring at her expectantly.

But Katniss’ brain was still running in circles. “Peeta’s not on guard. Why would he be picking me up?”

Miss Trinket’s patient smile looked strained now. “As I already told you,” she said slowly, surely believing Katniss dense now, “Guard and drumline will be representing the two houses. Guard will be Capulet and drumline Montague. Peeta’s on drumline, so naturally he’d be our star Montague.”

Her mind finally caught up to what everyone was suggesting. “Wait,” she said, sitting at the edge of her seat now. “If I’m Juliet and you’re saying he’s the star…” Her focus drifted to Peeta, who gave an amused, cocky wave, surely enjoying the multitude of emotions crossing her face in this moment. Her stomach dropped, this news hitting her harder than the spotlight one. “You’re Romeo?”

Instead of just answering with a simple yes/no like a normal person, or even some Ding! Ding! Ding! joke, Peeta lowered himself to the floor and responded in all his annoyingly obnoxious flair: “‘But, soft! What light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Juliet is the sun.’” He closed his eyes on the last word and reached for her hand, giving it a gentle kiss, his lips soft and warm against her now clammy skin. She swatted her hand away, tucking it around her bag for protection.

No. No, no, no. No!

This had to be a mistake. Her and Peeta Mellark? As Romeo and Juliet?

That was what Miss Trinket wanted to talk to him about, she realized. It wasn’t about her at all. She wanted to talk to him about being Romeo for the field show.

“I don’t understand,” Katniss said at last, when her stomach had finally recovered itself. “How can Peeta be Romeo when he’s going to be busy marching around with a snare drum? What about Finnick? He’s tall. Taller than Peeta, for sure. I’m sure he could just as easily lift me.”

Was she seriously that desperate to prefer the preening peacock Finnick Odair?

Yes, yes she was.

“Finnick will most likely play our Tybalt,” Miss Trinket remarked. “And as he is on guard, he will play a Capulet role.”

“What about gender bending the role?” Katniss suggested. “Who says Juliet has to be a girl? We are in the 21st century. And didn’t Shakespeare have men play the female roles, anyway? Let Finnick play Juliet to Peeta’s Romeo. He’d be perfect in the role.”

“Should I feel insulted that you don’t want to be my partner, Katniss?” Peeta innocently asked, enjoying this way too much. Her fists gripped her bag hard, her eyes deadly slits. People often told her how intimidating she looked, but Peeta didn’t even bat an eye. He was all smiles and dimples. If only looks could kill...

“Katniss,” Miss Trinket said curtly, snapping her attention back on the director, “I chose you as my next in command because I trust in your talent and know you are a driven young woman who people look up to. Now we both want the pleasure of seeing this band win first place at PSU, don’t we?”

“Yes, but—”

“And we will do what is necessary to move this band toward that goal, correct?”

“Of course, but—”

“But nothing, Everdeen,” Mr. Abernathy interjected at last, kicking his feet off the tall pile of sheet music laying by his desk. “You want to win?” He shook his hand at her, not needing a response. “Stupid question. Of course you do. I can see it all over your face. You’re too competitive to hide it. Well, to win you have to please the judges. Plain and simple. Judges like this kind of flair nonsense. So play our star-crossed lovers—”

“We’re not star-crossed lovers!” Katniss grit out, a bit harder than she intended, unable to look at Peeta as she said it. Not like it mattered. She could practically feel his amusement radiating off his person. “This won’t work, Mr. Abernathy. Don’t you want people who’ll get along? Peeta and I hate each other. We have for a really long time.”

“Who cares?” Mr. Abernathy asked, throwing his hands up in exasperation, his longish black hair falling in his face from the motion. “Pretend. Act like your lovesick classmates. I don’t care. It’s all a big show, anyway, and if pairing you two up wins us enough brownie points to win and shuts Trinket up for a year, then that’s what we’re going to do. Mellark’s already agreed to it and he’s never danced a day in his life. So now it’s your turn to be a good girl and agree to the plan, Everdeen. Got it?”

“Got it,” she muttered, slouching low in her chair. Of all the things she expected to hear today, pretending to be in love with Peeta Mellark was not one of them. This was definitely going to blow up in everyone’s faces, she was sure of it. Putting on a performance smile for judges was one thing, but acting like she was in love with Peeta was another. And then hoping he wouldn’t drop her when doing those stupid flips Miss Trinket mentioned? She was going to be in a body cast by the end of the season.

Peeta seemed to have dropped the amusement act at last, mirroring her sour mood as the two directors discussed extra one-on-one rehearsal time with Miss Trinket to better prepare Peeta since he had zero dance experience. Katniss tried to pay attention, but she couldn’t stop her eyes from glancing over at Peeta, wondering what he could possibly be thinking during all this. His jaw was clenched, she could tell, but he wasn’t looking at her or Trinket or even Abernathy. He was focusing on picking at a hole in his jeans, his eyebrows scrunched together. She understood the conflict—was feeling it herself—but he didn’t look mad. Just...troubled. Like something was said that he was having a hard time with.

Where to begin? Katniss thought bitterly, still unable to believe they were actually being forced to play Romeo and Juliet, like they were in some teenage drama or something.

“I know we have lots to work on, but just seeing the two of you together like this,” Miss Trinket said, motioning between them, “tells me I made the right decision. Look how adorable you two look! Pearls on a necklace! Didn’t I say that’s what they reminded me of, Haymitch?” She turned to Abernathy, who was now busy digging dirt from under his nails with his baton. Miss Trinket frowned before catching herself. “I did, I did! I said that earlier when I found you talking in the back.” She winked and oh god. Could they just go already?

********

It took another fifteen minutes of talking and goodbyes that were very much not goodbyes before they were truly free from the office. Katniss bolted out the side door as quickly as she could, cursing under her breath at how long she’d been in there. That took almost an hour! Madge and Gale were probably wondering what was taking so long. Or maybe not. It was Trinket, after all.

The parking lot was nearly empty now as she crossed it, digging around for her battered up phone to text. Hopefully they were still up for burgers because after that talk...yeah. She needed the greasiest burger available. Wait until she tells her friends she’s playing Juliet and that Peeta Mellark was her Romeo. They might not believe her, thinking it a practical joke and asking what Trinket really wanted. That’s how absurd this whole situation sounded.

“Katniss!” she heard her name called out. “Hey, wait up!” She turned and saw Peeta waving her down, his long legs quickly catching up to her. Part of her wanted to pretend she didn’t hear him and keep moving, her car just across the street from where she stood. It’d be a safer bet, too, moving along, because nothing good was ever said when she was upset. This afternoon being a prime example. But for some reason, she was curious what Peeta had to say about all this. She stopped at the street corner and pretended to check for traffic despite the road being empty of any moving vehicle.

“Damn,” he laughed, a bit breathless as he caught up next to her. “I forgot how fast your fight or flight response is.”

“I’m not fleeing,” she frowned, checking the street for real this time before crossing. She dug around the front pocket of her book bag, pulling out both her keys and phone. “School’s done and I’m going to Sae’s with Gale and Madge. You know, my friends.”

“I know who Gale and Madge are.”

“Just checking,” she stated cooly, flipping her braid over her shoulder, “since you practically accused me of having none earlier.”

He winced. “Yeah, not the finest thing I’ve ever said. I’m sorry about that.”

She shrugged. “It’s fine, Peeta.” It wasn’t, but if she kept telling herself that, maybe she’ll believe it. “We can’t all be Mr. Popular like you.”

“Right.” He looked back at the student parking lot where he parked. Unlike her family, his could afford the $350 the school charged for a parking space. “Listen, about what you said in there. About us hating each other.” Katniss raised an eyebrow, curious where this would lead. “I don’t...hate you.”

Well that was...unexpected. Was that why he looked so troubled in the meeting? Because she said they hated each other? She took a step back from him, realizing he was closer than she felt comfortable with, and waited for the rest of it. It didn’t sound like he was finished, like there was a big but hanging at the end of his sentence. What else did he want to say? But I still don’t really like you? But I think you’re annoying and working with you is going to suck? But I think you’re a bitch? Honestly, the list could go on about all the negative things Peeta could say about her, but he said nothing. He just looked down at his shoes and kicked at some loose pebbles in the street.

“Oh,” she said, unsure what else there was to say. “I guess that will make rehearsal easier.”

He nodded, a bit too jerky to look natural. “Yeah. I just—it’s important to me that you know that I don’t hate you. I’ve never hated you. Mad beyond belief? Yeah. Lots of times, actually. But never hate. I could never hate you, Katniss.”

“Oh,” she said again, dumbfounded. “Well, thanks, Peeta. I guess. That’s... Good to know.” And just because her sour mood couldn’t help itself, “I’ll be able to sleep happy tonight knowing you don’t hate me.” She made a face, instantly regretting her words, and yanked open her car door, needing to just leave. “Listen, I gotta go. Gale and Madge are already waiting for me and Trinket took forever rambling about how we’re pearl necklaces. They’re waiting for me.”

He didn’t say anything as she got in the car, the loud, embarrassing screech of her engine once on making any type of conversation near impossible to hold. He stepped away and gave a halfhearted wave, all bravado gone now, as she pulled away from the curb. By the time she thought to wave back, it was too late and her car was halfway down the street.

God, she really was a heartless bitch.

*******

It was only hours later—after returning home from drowning her frustrations in the thickest chocolate shake Sae could make and celebrating her good news with her mom and sister over pizza—did she allow herself to think about Peeta Mellark.

On a whim, she pulled the framed photo she kept of her and her dad off her nightstand and held it, her grip tightening as she studied the ridiculous faces they’re making at the camera. It was one of the last pictures they took together before his passing. She can’t remember what prompted them to make the faces, but she wished she could go back and make them again with him. To be with her dad for just one more day. One more hour, even. She’d do anything for that.

Katniss closed her eyes and hugged the frame close to her chest for a moment, trying to stop any tears from slipping past her tight emotional control. She was safe to cry in her room, but wanted to wait until she was in bed with the lights turned off before crying over this emotionally draining day.

When it felt like she had her emotions under control, Katniss used her longest fingernail to lift the tabs on the back of the frame and carefully took the picture out, unfolding the right-half of it to reveal a young curly-haired Peeta smiling up at her, her dad’s arm thrown over his shoulders.

She stared at the full photo for the longest time, remembering how mad she was at him for taking this one simple thing from her. She never minded Peeta being in her family photos before. She sometimes pulled him in for ones when her dad or mom shouted, “Picture time! Show us your pearly whites!” But that was when she still thought they’d have more time. Why wouldn’t there be more time? Dads weren’t supposed to die until you were old and had kids of your own. That’s how it was supposed to be. They weren’t supposed to die when you’re eleven and barely old enough to understand the cruelty of the world. The unfairness of it all.

Katniss barely remembered a time when it was just her and her dad. Alone. No Peeta. No Prim. Just Dad and her.

She didn’t even have a good photo of just the two of them.

Just boxes upon boxes of photos of him, her, and Peeta.

The magical trio.

The full photo didn’t bring up any past resentment this time, though. Instead, it reminded her how much fun the three of them used to have, bumming around town while Aunt Lulu watched Prim at her shop, singing along to the radio and playing Punch Buggy. Her dad always made it a point to include Peeta on any outing they made, even if it involved going to the grocery store. How disappointed Dad would be seeing us now, she thought, tracing over his face with her thumb. Her and Peeta not friends anymore.

But Peeta Mellark doesn’t hate her. Katniss didn’t understand why hearing that felt like a weight had lifted off her, but she felt lighter now, the more she thought about it. Like it was easier to breathe again.

“Peeta Mellark doesn’t hate me,” she whispered to the photo, the words tasting sweet on her tongue. A small smile pulled at her lips and she said it again. “He doesn’t hate me, Dad.”

Katniss didn’t understand why Peeta thought it was important she knew he didn’t hate her, but it was all her mind kept thinking of, and she was glad to hear it.

He didn’t hate her. He never had.

#Everlark fanfiction #The Hunger Games Fanfiction #The Hunger Games #Everlark #Everlark fanfic #My writing #The Dance of the Color Guard Op. 64 #I realized in the sneak peek I put ch 4 instead of 3 #because I forget prologue is different #*face palm*#I hope you enjoy!!#Like and reblog!#Let me know what you think!#Finally getting the ball ROLLING

45 notes · View notes

im-reddie · 6 years

Text

Not Me Without You: Chapter 1

OK so this took me like almost a month,I’m not finished obviously but i’m posting this in chapters because its Sooooooooo long. This was supposed to be a one shot, sorry.

summary: Today is Richie Tozier’s 16th birthday, he is assured today will be a good day by Eddie, but as he watches a speeding car heading straight for Eddie in the middle of the street, his thoughts on how his day would go quickly changed.

Pairings: Ben x Beverly, Stan x Bill, Richie x Eddie.

Warnings: Talk of suicide.

Chapter 1| Chapter 2

Today was Richie Tozier’s birthday. He was turning 16 but his parents couldn’t care less. He got up 1 pm just like any other summer day and walked down stairs to his mother asleep on the couch, probably sleeping off a hangover from the night before. His father as usual was at work, making money to feed his liquid poison addiction.

He walked to the kitchen and looked in the refrigerator in hopes of finding a birthday cake or even a small cupcake. But despite his expectations, nothing. He went back upstairs after seeing there was no more milk for cereal. he changed into some shorts and a white t-shirt. He could tell today was gonna be a hot summer day and he wanted to be as cool as possible.

The phone downstairs rang and he could here his mother groan.

“uuuuuggghhh shuuuuUUUUUUTTT UUUUUUPPP!!!!!” Richie's mother yelled.

“I’ve got it mom” he said. his mother went back to sleep hearing his comment.

“Hello?”

“Haaaaaaaappy Biiiiiiiirrrthdaaaayy toooooo yoooooouuuu” Eddie sang on the other line. Richie smiled at hearing his friend singing the not so familiar tune.

“Haaaaappy Biiiiiiiiirthday toooooo yooouu, Happy BIRTHDAY dear Richiiiiiiiiiiiiiieeee...HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!” Eddie finished the song and Richie felt himself smiling from ear to ear.

“You remembered ed’s?”

“duh Richie, You’re my best friend why wouldn’t I?”

“Well I thought I would have annoyed you enough last year to make you forget.” Richie said this jokingly but with an undertone of complete seriousness.

Eddie laughed at Richie’s comment before explaining that he would never forget anything about his “good ol’ pal Richard Tozier.”

“Got any plans today?” Eddie asked. Richie rolled his eyes.

“Do i ever have any plans other than to hang out with the biggest losers in derry?” Richie joked. His friends weren’t losers, not to him anyway. He looked up to them in ways he would never admit. Bill for leadership, Beverly for bravery, Ben for his passion with the things he does, Mike for strength, Stan for his...well he didn’t really know but it was something, and Eddie for his caring and Nurturing personality.

“meet me at the corner store by my house, I have a surprise for you.” Richie smiled and said ok. He walked out the door and thought to himself about how he thought today was gonna go. probably like every other birthday, little get together with the losers and a few presents. A good night, maybe even the best night of the year if he had a rough one.

He was determined not to let anyone bring him down today. Hopefully this wouldn’t have to be the best day of the year, but if it was he was more than happy to be spending it with his best friend Edward Spaghedward Kaspbrak.

He started walking to Eddie’s little corner store. Once inside he walked around the store to see if he could find Eddie, but he was nowhere to be found.

Richie stayed in the back section of the store for about 2 minutes before hearing the echoing ring of a bell. He looked up over the short aisles and saw an anxious Eddie Kaspbrak. He seemed to be waiting, probably for Richie. He was looking out the window and messing with his hair.

Richie Finally decided to go up to the boy and tap him him on the shoulder.

Eddie turned around and looked surprised.

“What the-...how long have you been here?” Eddie asked. Richie laughed at Eddie’s reaction.

“Not even a minute ed’s don’t worry.”

“Oh ok, good. I thought I was gonna be here earlier but my mom was interrogating me so it took longer than I thought.”

“It’s ok Eddie, you know I’d wait for you until the end of the world.” Eddie blushed and Richie smiled at knowing what his actions could do.

“So what’s my surprise?” Richie asked excitedly.

Eddie made a guilty expression and looked at Richie.

“umm....about that..”

“you forgot it?”

“No um...my mom took my money because she said she didn’t want me to spend it on anyone unless it was myself and I already told her it was to buy you something.” All Richie could do was just nod. He hated the way his friends with normal-ish parents viewed Richie. Troubled, annoying, bad influence. And it wasn’t the fact that Eddie didn't get him a gift that made his next actions happen, it was the fact that none of his friends parents treated him like he was a good friend of their kids. He wasn’t told “you’re more than welcome to come over anytime you want” or “we love you like our own child” or “you are now apart of this family”. He was never loved by any other parents let alone his.

“I’m really sorry Rich...it’s my fault, I shouldn’t have sai-” Eddie was cut off by Richie’s cracking voice.

“its ok- *coughs* It’s ok ed’s, really you couldn’t help it” Richie’s eyes quickly took on a glossy look and he felt a small pain crawl up his throat. He quickly suppressed his urge to cry. It wasn’t a thing that Richie did willingly. Nobody in the Group had seen Richie cry Except Eddie and Stan.

Eddie had found him sitting at the top of the ledge they usually jumped from into the quarry. He stood behind him for a few seconds preparing himself for what might happen.

Eddie sat next to him and saw him looking out onto the water, tear streaming down his cheek. “nobody cares...” was the first thing Richie said.

Eddie knew not to say anything, just to listen. Sometime the worst possible thing you could do to someone who vents to you is to tell them a solution to their problems, instead of letting them be upset.

“I could jump right now into the shallow end and if i died, nobody would care.” Eddie knew not to speak but his urge overpowered his will to stay quiet.

He hated seeing Richie sad. There was a few times that Eddie caught his friend off guard but he was never crying. He instinctively put his hand over his friends to comfort him.

“I would.”

Richie looked over at Eddie. He didn’t smile, he didn’t make any facial expression. He just stared at Eddie. The smaller boy didn’t know what to do so he just smiled.

“You have me...I’m Eddie spaghetti remember?” Richie took his glasses off, still looking at his friend.

Eddie wiped away Richie’s tear. “I know we aren’t really that close Richie but...I care. I always laugh at your jokes whether I show it or not.”

“from now on, your pain is my pain. No more acting like you’re ok when you’re clearly not, no more crying by yourself, no more being miserable by yourself. If you wanna be miserable then come be miserable with me.”

Richie gave Eddie a small smile. He pulled his hand away from under Eddie’s. Eddie thought he had weirded out his friend, but Richie ended up putting his hand in Eddie’s.

“You know i never thought you liked me all that much Ed’s”

Eddie laughed and gave Richie a playful punch on the shoulder.

“Richie I tried not to like you, believe me. But the thought that someone the polar opposite of me could be feeling the same things and thinking the same thoughts gave me hope that I could have an actual friend.”

Both the boys smiled and Richie finally had hope that he could actually be happy again.

Stan saw him cry whenever they watched Beaches. And at first it was funny because Stan was secretly crying too but whenever Richie was crying, it seemed way too intense to just be from the movie. Stan let Richie cry on his shoulder for about 20 minutes after the movie ended. He comforted him while hearing his sobs, feeling him shake, seeing him let out so much emotion at such an opportune moment that ended up lasting longer than he hoped. after Richie was finished he looked up at Stan.

“*sniff* thanks...don’t tell...please.” Stan nodded his head and they never spoke of it again. Stan may have always acted like he didn’t like richie but they were actually pretty close before he started getting closer with Eddie. After that they kind of drifted from each other. Richie always regretted leaving stan in such a bad way, it felt as if he had just cheated. But he never thought about it too much seeing as stan acted cool sometimes despite the light insults and common eye rolls.

Eddie grabbed Richie’s arm as a way of comfort.

“Hey, remember your pain is my pain.” Richie nodded and rubbed his eyes a little bit.

“It doesn’t matter what my mom thinks about you tozier, it should matter more what I think about you.”

“And what do you think about me?” Richie asked playfully.

“I think you’re a pain in the ass.” the boys both laugh before Eddie continues his sentence. “But you’re a pain in the ass I can’t live without.”

Richie looks up and puts his hand on his chin.

“hmm so you need me to give you pain in your ass in order for you to live? i guess if it depends on your life ed’s, I’m doing this for you.” Eddie punches his arm hard but he’s not strong enough to hurt Richie that bad.

“shut up trashmouth you know what i meant.” the boys laugh and leave the store with nothing in their hands.

“we’re going to the quarry until late tonight so we could celebrate.” Richie gave a half smile towards the ground. He was honestly so appreciative of his friends and the way they cared for him better than anyone who was supposed to, actually did. He always wants to hang out with any of them because they made him feel happy. sometimes even the happiest he’s been in a while.

“Ok. Hey let's cross the street right here i want some ice cream.”

“k” was all Eddie said before pressing on, not bothering to wait for his friend.

“I’ll catch up I gotta tie my shoe”

Eddie nodded and pressed on. He was almost to the middle of the street when he heard his watch start to beep.

Time to take my pills. He thought.

He took a long blue capsuled assorted box out of his fanny pack and had some trouble opening it. When he finally did open it, it was with so much force that it caused him to drop almost half of the pills on the road.

Crap

He bent down to pick up his pills with his back against the oncoming traffic side of the road. Richie looked up after hearing a pop and saw eddie bend down to pick up his pills.

“Dude! Get out of the street Eddie!” Eddie looked behind him for any oncoming cars but saw nothing.

Eddie continued to Pick up his pills, slowly, putting them back in the boxes they’re supposed to go. Eddie felt like he needed his pills despite finding out that they do nothing for him because he isn’t actually sick.

about 10 seconds go by and Richie is just watching from the sidewalk hoping he doesn't see a car come from behind eddie.

*Crash* *Screech* Richie turned his head to the left and saw a wreck in the middle of a stop light. Eddie and Richie both sighed in relief.

Richie looked back at Eddie as he continued to pick up his assorted pills. Richie looked behind him and saw a car coming from behind eddie.

“Get out of the street!” Richie yelled.

“I’m almos-” Eddie didn’t get to finish his sentence before he heard a honk and then screeching tires come from behind him. He stood up and looked behind him and saw a car coming faster than what seemed like a speeding bullet.

He closed his eyes tight from instinct thinking it might not hurt as bad if he doesn’t see it happen. He felt a heavy impact on his side and pain surged through his whole body when he hit the ground. Everything was moving in slow motion. He felt the wind through his hair as he was flying to the ground and he felt his body hit the ground slowly before feeling immense pain.

He opened his eyes, expecting to see blood, broken bones, possibly even nothing.

But to his surprise he didn’t see any of that. He opened his eyes and saw Richie laying above his body. He heard Richie breathing hard, Eddie just stared at the boy on top of him in shock.

In a desperate attempt to speak, Eddie opened his mouth. But the only thing that came out was a small croak. He had almost died.

I should have died. I saw the car almost hit me, I closed my eyes for not even 3 seconds, how am I alive?

I should be dead...

“Eddie?” Richie spoke in an attempt to get his friend out of his shocked state.

Eddie looked around and then back at richie, his vision slowly fogging up before releasing a single tear.

Eddie’s bottom lip begins to quiver and he puts his arms around Richies neck and pulls himself up into a hug. Richie uses one one arm to hug eddie and uses the other one to support both of their weight

“I-I’m dead...” eddie says into Richie’s shoulder.

Richie pulls away and looks into Eddie’s eyes.

“No Eddie, your-...you’re ok, look” Richie gets up and points to the road.

He kneels down next to eddie who is now sitting up.

“See? No blood, no bones, no Eddie. You’re right here.” Richie gently pushes his finger into Eddie’s chest.

Eddie looks down, sees his intact body and feels his face for any broken bones.

“What happened?” Eddie asks.

“I pushed you out of the way” Richie responded.

“So-So I didn’t die?”

“No. I promise.” Richie said comfortingly.

He stood up, towering over the boy and held his hand out for Eddie to grab.

Once he had a hold of Eddie, he pulls him up.

“Hey kid are you alright?!” The man in the speeding car asked. He had gotten out of the car while Richie was talking to Eddie.

“Uh- ya I-I think so” Eddie replied.

“Good! next time don’t stand in the middle of the road, I almost totaled my car because of you!” Eddie looked at the man with a mixed expression. Half confused, half upset.

Richie looked appalled. He was about to go off on this stranger who almost killed his best friend, but was interrupted by Eddie.

“Excuse me!? This road right here” Eddie pointed down the way the stranger came. “Is completely straight for another mile back.” Eddie stated blatantly. “If you would have hit me, it was because YOU weren’t paying attention dumbass!”

Richie looks back at Eddie with an astonished expression.

“Yeah well-...” He was tongue tied. Both Richie and Eddie saw the mans face fade into a shade of red that could only be caused by stubbornness.

The stranger stormed off in a fit of rage, not wanting to accept the fact that he was wrong. He got in his car, closed the door, and drove off recklessly fast.

“Don’t worry about him Eddie, I’m just glad you’re okay.” Richie adjusts his glasses while looking at Eddie.

“C’mon let’s go to the quarry, forget about the ice cream I’m sure everyone else is waiting for us right?” Richie asks. Eddie just nods his head in response.

The boys walked to the quarry from the unfortunate pit stop they made. Richie glances over at the unusually quiet boy right next to him, wondering what was going on his head. Eddie notices his friend sending looks his way but ignores them. He was too busy thinking about how the rest of the day would have gone if he had been hit by that car.

“Do you wanna tell the others? About that guy i mean.” Richie asks. Eddie doesnt even look in his direction before shaking his head. He knew it would take away the focus from the day that was supposed to be all about Richie. He didn’t want to do that to his friend. Little did he know that Richie couldn’t care less about his birthday. The only thing that made those days special was his friends, more importantly Eddie.

When the boys arrived at the quarry they were greeted at the top of the cliff by their friends.

Richie smiled at the sight of all his friends together in one place specifically for him. However when he looked over at Eddie, he saw the boy looking off into space with a blank expression until Mike came up to him and greeted him. He noticed Eddies face make smiling and happy movements, but he could tell Eddie didn’t mean a single smile he put out. Eddie wasn’t trying to let Richie know he wasn’t happy. This day was all about him, not Eddie.

“Hey trashmouth, we got you a birthday cupcake, see?” Bev pulled a white frosted sprinkled cupcake from behind her back and put it in front of Richie.

Richie grinned, what looked like, from ear to ear. He loved birthday desserts.

“W-We’ve gotta light it fi-first.” Bill managed to get out. “Did an-anyone bring a lighter?” he asked.

“Oh, I did!” Ben said. He went to his backpack that was sitting against a rock and pulled out a small lighter. Nobody knew it but the reason he had a lighter was so that Beverly would always ask him to light her cigarettes. He knew she would always remember he had a lighter, he didn’t find smoking attractive unless Beverly was the one doing it.

Ben went back up to Bev and gave her a small glance before stroking the small thumbwheel, causing a flame to rise.

Once the candle on the cupcake was lit, the group started to chant the lyrics to the “happy birthday” song.

“Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday dear Richiiiiieee, Happy Birthday to yoooooouuuu” they all sang in unison including eddie. Richie occasionally directed his gaze over to Eddie who was also singing. He didn’t seem to be looking at Richie though, it seemed as if he was singing along instead of to Richie which hurt him a little bit.

Once they were all done bev said, “Okay make a wish Mr.16 year old!”

Richie Blew his candle out after thinking

I wish something in my life would finally go my way.

@asgardiantrash @stenbroughbros @1justnikkine1 @istanstantheman @elesbianna @sten-bros @musicalfangirla113 @little-miss-hellraiser

#IT #IT2017 #it 2017 #IT 2019 #Reddie #Stenbrough #Richie tozier #Reddie fic #my writing #my post #my fic #Angst prompt #IT Fic #not me without you

39 notes · View notes

sweetnestor · 6 years

Text

On Days Like This | Chapter 10

teamiplier + oc, romantic/angst/platonic

PREVIOUS FICS (if you’re new here then I suggest reading these first)

previous chapter

@bellasanti: I have found a song that has bested me…

Attached to the tweet was a clip of me singing “Love Me Or Leave Me” by Little Mix, particularly all the high notes towards the end of the song. My face was contorted as I tried to hit every one, and it was difficult. Not to toot my own horn, but I could usually sing risky songs like that with next to no problem, but with this song… my voice cracked several times.

Or maybe I couldn’t sing it because it made me feel really, unbearably guilty. But Dan knew the song on piano and when he started playing it, I couldn’t just tell him to stop! Then, Mark took my phone and started recording, so I was really in deep and couldn’t dig myself out.

I watched back the clip, shaking my head and cringing at myself as I walked around the stage. Mark and Dan were mindlessly playing tunes, waiting for me to join them again. I closed the Twitter app and went to my texts, opening up my conversation with Ethan. Nothing new, not even an indication that he was typing. Our silence gave me a lot of room to listen to music and clear my head. But all I could think of was how hard Ethan had cried yesterday, and all the things he said… how I treated him prior to all of that…

Swallowing the lump in my throat, I joined Mark and Dan once again. We continued rehearsing the acoustic set, or the one acapella song in our set.

Little Mix kept circling my head as we sang. I distinctly remembered watching a video of the group singing this particular song, The End, for the first time. When Perrie Edwards was in the middle of singing her solo (ironically, the same solo I took on), she burst into tears and couldn’t finish the song. Every time I listened to that song, that was what I thought of. I’m not saying that I had a meltdown while rehearsing or performing on stage, but god that moment resonated with me deeply.

I felt just like Perrie by the time my rehearsal was done. Although, I didn’t feel as crappy as I did yesterday, when I practically hid in the bathrooms in the hotel lobby, silently crying my eyes out until after midnight. By the time I had returned to my room, Ethan was gone, having spent the night in one of his friends’ rooms. I was glad there wasn’t a show yesterday, I wasn’t sure how either of us would have done it.

Today was different. The circumstances required me to remain civil and strong faced. Just, not right this second. I spent the last hour singing while remaining calm and collected. This hour was dedicated to letting my mascara run down my face. The next hour would be for holding myself together again.

The security guard walking me to the bus was decent enough to act like I wasn’t on the verge of tears. I silently thanked him as I climbed the steps onto the vehicle, and I nearly collided into someone coming off.

It was Tyler. My plan to wallow and feel sorry for myself alone was now ruined. I sidestepped past him to the couch, and he followed my trail.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, concerned.

I shook my head as I started to cry more. I hadn’t talked about my dumb issues with anyone on this tour, why start now? Tyler was patient and persistent, though.

“I know there’s a lot going on right now,” he told me. “Things are hectic, it’s overwhelming. You can talk about it, it’s okay.”

It was stuck in my throat. But I only had one hour, and I already used up ten minutes. How could I explain anything that I was feeling?

“W-We keep f-fighting!” I cried after a moment. “We’re just r-ripping our heads off!”

Tyler didn’t need to ask who I was talking about. “Fighting about what, if I may ask?”

I thought my boyfriend cheated and vice versa. He treats me like I’m broken, I treat him like he’s nothing. My body pushed out dead offspring and it’s fucking with our heads a lot more than we - or, I - would like to admit.

I sniffed and wiped my eyes. Here we go. “I-It started with the miscarriage…”

“Is that what happened when you went to the hospital?” Tyler asked after a moment of silence.

“You didn’t know?” That was a bit of a surprise, given all the attention I got when I returned from the hospital. I thought of all the people coddling me and shunting Ethan to the side, and then I felt guilty.

“No, well… when the paramedics took you away, Kathryn shielded everyone from your bunk,” he explained. “She and Amy cleaned up and made some calls to get you a new mattress. Mark suggested to just switch buses altogether, y’know, for your sake, but that couldn’t be done.”

My stomach turned, and my cheeks heated up. I wasn’t sure why Kathryn and Amy would go through that for me. I couldn’t imagine anyone here making a fuss like that, not even Ethan. Why would they?

“A couple of people asked what happened,” Tyler went on, “but Kathryn was a little shaken up after you left. And I don’t think she wanted to breach your privacy, because she didn’t tell. But most of us saw the bloodstains.”

“So everyone knows it was a miscarriage?” I asked nervously. I made a mental note to attempt to hug Kathryn later. “Because no one’s asked me.”

He hesitated, thinking about it. “There’s been some talk. Don’t take this the wrong way-”

“Oh no.”

“-but you’ve been kind of… ah, unapproachable since the hospital,” Tyler admitted. “I know, and so do Mark, Amy, Kathryn, and Ethan - we know you have to put on a front to deal with all of this. But, I think you’re trying so hard to be strong and unaffected by what happened that you just… look very intimidating in front of everyone else… and a little mean, too.”

Abort! Abort! Abort! Pack it up, boys, we’re going home! Let’s never show our face here again!

“Oh…” More tears welled up in my eyes.

“I understand that this is how you cope, but don’t shut out others when they want to help. You’re never going to be alone.”

He put his arm around me as I momentarily fell apart. I guess I didn’t really have to talk in order to open up. I just had to trust the person enough to be vulnerable around them. The only I people I trusted were Jack, who wasn’t here anymore, and Ethan, who didn’t want me here. But now I was crying on Tyler’s shoulder, because he conveniently caught me in a moment of need.

We pulled away from each other when the door to the bus opened. Someone must have been sent to drag us to the stage. I quickly wiped at my eyes and nose, only to look up and find Ethan entering the confined space.

His eyes were shiny with his own tears. However, he stopped in his tracks when he spotted me and Tyler on the couch. It looked like Ethan was trying to figure out what was happening just before he entered, and when he came to a conclusion, he turned on his heel and left.

“Wait!” Tyler called, then he nudged me. “Go after him!”

“I can’t,” I told him, despite how nervous it made me. “We agreed not to fight today.”

“So you’re just going to let him leave feeling like that? On top of everything else that’s going on?”

The guilt already sitting in my chest only struck harder. I looked at Tyler as if to say, “please don’t make me…” He stood his ground, though, so I took a quick look in the bathroom mirror and erased the mascara trail from under my eyes. Then, I sped off the bus.

I found him in the dressing room he shared with Dan, except Dan wasn’t there. The door was open, but I still knocked, seeing that Ethan was sitting at the vanity, typing on his phone.

“Hey,” he greeted, like he hadn’t been in tears a few minutes prior. He turned his head towards me, offering a smile.

Weirdly enough, it made me anxious. I fumbled on my words as I tried to explain what had happened on the bus, but Ethan stood up and stopped me.

“It’s okay,” he told me, offering his hand. “We’re not fighting today, remember?”

I stepped into the room as I took his hand. It was a little relieving that we hadn’t resorted to yelling and crying again. At the same time, the physical affection was just increasing my anxiety. What was the purpose for this? Was he just killing me with kindness?

Ethan’s gaze was a little much, too. Then again, I couldn’t really remember the last time I actually looked him in the eyes. I almost forgot how pretty they were…

Next thing I knew, he was pressing me up against the wall next to the door, which was still wide open. His hands tightly gripped my waist, and then he was kissing me full on the mouth. I was surprised, to say the least, but I couldn’t stop him. My hands found his shoulders, naturally pulling him in closer.

I wanted to blame lingering hormones on my sudden surge of lust, but it was Ethan keeping me trapped between him and the wall. He knew what I liked, and he was using it against me. He could get me to do whatever he wanted in this position. He had my bottom lip between his teeth, and he kept me in place with his body pressed up against mine.

The sound of a door closing down the hall pulled us apart. My breath was taken away as Ethan stepped away from me. Rationality was starting to return. Today was a non-fighting day, but we were still mad at each other, right?

“Why…?” I whispered, like I was still trying to come back to earth.

“I don’t remember the last time I kissed you,” he admitted, now a little timid. “And because I love you.”

“I lo-”

“No,” he said, much to my surprise. “You'd only be saying it because I kissed you. You can't say things when you're emotional. Isn't that what you told me?”

My cheeks grew even warmer. There were quite a few things Ethan failed to remember about us, like anniversaries, birthdays, and little things about me. I was not expecting him to remember that particular thing I told him many months ago. I could only stare at the ground, embarrassed and still blown away from the random kiss.

“I don't know what I did to make you stop loving me,” Ethan continued, “but we'll fight about that tomorrow, okay?”

Well, if I said it now, he would think it's because I'm obligated. My feelings of lust turned into heavy guilt. I watched Ethan leave without another word, feeling even worse.

The only person I texted that day was my sponsor.

______

#crankgameplays x oc #ethan nestor x reader #teamiplier x oc #sweetheart writes #odlt fic #here u go ive had this ready in my docs for too long lol #im still not really in a Writing Mood and its kinda making me feel ://////#but yeah anyway now to Explain Myself abt this chapter #i was originally gonna make bella have an emotional outburst in the middle of rehearsal with mark and dan #and that would have made a lot more sense given the kinda shit shes been bottling up #also it would have been a 'life imitates art... or life imitates life' kinda thing #yknow with the video i conveniently linked #and yeah ethan is Stressed abt tour and shit so that is why they are Not(tm) fighting #idk why i had him kiss her so unexpectedly idk maybe i was Thirsty when i first wrote this #like theyre the type to have Angry Hate Sex but given the circumstances that shit couldnt happen #also ethan was obvs jealous abt seeing his lady in the arms of his friendo so like....#another original thought was that he was gonna kiss her in front of everyone #to like.... 'mark his territory' but that was dumb #he just has to let bella know shes still his even when they hate each other #and shes texting her AA sponsor who is still completely nameless idek #anyway the end is near #and im trying to write spoop and 12 days epilogue but aaaahhhhh #spring is coming and my mentality isnt taking it well #thanks for the validation duders

8 notes · View notes

bluebookbadger-blog · 7 years

Text

The Price of a Life - Chapter 6

Title: The Price of a Life Fandom (s): Fullmetal Alchemist/Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood Summary: I always thought waking up in another world would be a lot more…interesting. At least slightly exciting and terrifying, but it really wasn’t. It was more of a sudden and underwhelming event, that landed me in the company of fiction and its ignorance to modern physics. I thought it was a dream. Boy was I wrong. Characters: SI/OC, Maes Hughes, Edward Elric, Alphonse Elric, etc. Rating: PG-13

A/N: I do not own any Disney films or associated materials mentioned in this or any upcoming chapters. Any opinions of Disney expressed by the characters are their own.

I rested my head against the window the the train, watching the countryside pass by. Did you know how awful it was to get 'Let it Go' stuck in your head, and have no other music to drown it out? Truth, why couldn't you have left me in a strange world with at least an Ipod or my phone or something! I guessed it would have messed up the entire technology gap, but how could I have cared about that with Idina Menzel screaming in my skull?

"What's the matter Mac?" Hughes asked, noting my pained expression. It was just him and me, Denny and Maria has missed the train and were taking a later one, and Armstrong had left with the Elrics to Resembool.

I still had a few episodes to go until the Fifth Laboratory incident, but I needed to be on my guard. Things were progressing on schedule, but the room for error was small in my upcoming scheme.

"Do you ever get that good but overplayed song stuck in your head?" I asked, looking on as we passed some cows. They looked like Brahmans, which was strange considering that breed developed in the West Indies, but hey - Amestris was an entire smattering of countries apparently so why bother questioning anything.

"Can't say that I have…" Hughes said, observing me carefully. "Do they play a lot of music in your village?" I looked up, having not thought of how I'd translate my world into a small village.

"Yeah, all the time. Whenever a new song is written people go crazy about it have it played over and over again by anyone who can sing and use an instrument. Most people have instruments of all sorts in their house and can sing - from farmers to the mayor, everybody knows the same songs by heart." I smiled imagining this in the small village of Ire. "It keeps everybody in touch with new ideas and upcoming events - like a spoken newspaper but with more emotion and less job advertisements."

"Do you not have a publisher in Ire?" I gave a small laugh - this talk was actually getting the damned song out of my head.

"Yeah, but not a lot of people read newspapers. It's much faster and easier to spread news by song." I needed to start replacing any modern technology with song, it'd make this whole technology gap seem a lot smaller. "But that song I have stuck in my head is just a stupid - well, it's not actually that bad, and it conveys a really good message, but people sang it way too often instead of singing any relevant songs, which made it hard to get information around in newer songs. Just annoying."

I sighed, looking out the window. I really did like the song when I first heard it, and I didn't mind that it was so popular, but having it stuck in your head for two hours on a train was one of the worst forms of psychological pain I had endured since coming here.

"You're village sounds fun," I nodded, aware he was subtly interrogating me. It didn't matter. Years of lying to my siblings, and to my parents for those same siblings - not to mention having a sister in the military - coupled with my overactive imagination made it very easy to convince myself that Ire was a real place.

"Yeah, it was fun. I kind of miss it now and then, but it's pretty cool being here in Amestris too." I sighed, happy that the infernal song had been replaced with 'Reflection' from Mulan. Still Disney, but not overly popular Disney.

You know how you think you'd remember all of your favorite songs by your favorite bands if you were dropped somewhere isolated for a while? Nope. I could barely recall a single line of any of my favorite songs - let alone the names of the bands. Only Disney songs and childhood lullabies remained, probably for the best.

"Irish," Wait, he never called me Irish. Hughes, what the hell were you going to ask? "Why did you leave Ire? You must miss your family, and you're too young to be traveling by yourself." Jokes on you Maes Hughes! I had come up with this story during all of those sleepless nights whenever I wasn't working on the future, I had been making up my past.

"Long story, do we have the time?" I asked peering around for a clock. Hughes took out a pocket watch - not a pretty engraved silver one like the one given to State Alchemists. Its hands read 10:10, and judging by the sun peering over the horizon, it was morning. We had only left around 8:00, meaning we wouldn't be back in Central until supper time.

"Well, I left because I heard alchemists here in Amestris were very gifted. I came to find one who specializes in medically based alchemy." I patted my bag, the lists of registered alchemists. "Beyond my plan for organizing Scar's target range, I wanted to see if there were any that met the requirements I was looking for."

"Why were you looking for a bioalchemist who specialized in medicine?" Hughes prodded gently. I could almost see him making a mental note of every word I said.

His suspicion was growing, and rightfully so. I had all but predicted every one of Scar's moves - I wouldn't be surprised if anyone thought I was working with him. I was one of the only people to face him alone and live to tell the tale.

"My mother," I looked down, feeling my cheeks warm in actually distress as I touched the Celtic cross, which had once more jumped over the collar of the blouse I was wearing. "She's very sick, and none of the doctors can explain her illness. It presents itself as a cross between dementia and leprosy, she's forgetting where she is, and her limbs are slowly dying."

I gulped down the lump in my throat, happy those years of drama club were paying off. And, part of it wasn't entirely acting. Back home, my mother had bravely fought off stage three cancer, at the price of her legs. Not all of the tears pricking at my eyes were fake.

"I-I thought, since the alchemists here are some of the best in the world, not to mention you have some of the latest medical technology, I'd be able to find someone who'd have some knowledge on the subject."

"Mac," Hughes said as I wiped the tears from my eyes. No time to have a mental breakdown right here and now - I'd have to save that for when the carnage of the series began. "I'm sorry-"

"No, no," I said, taking a deep breath, "I'm sorry, um, what else do you want to know?" I sniffed, looking down as a man came by with a cart.

"Do you want anything-"

"No, thank you." Hughes said curtly, annoyed with the interruption. As the man moved on, he turned back to me.

"Tell me anything you want to, I'm not forcing you to talk Mac." Maes Hughes was such a sweet guy, it almost made me start crying again.

"Um, well, we had this huge library. My dad never could convince my mother to open it to the public or as book store, and after she got sick he never had to heart to. When I wasn't with my siblings or working at Mr. Solosky's farm, I was in there. Most of the books were nonfiction - science documents, research papers, boring stuff like that.

"But every now and then there'd be a good fiction novel, and I'd read them over and over again to my little brothers. I'd read the science and research papers, but my brother never really bonded with me over those - they're just boys, you know? Nothing satisfies their little minds more than a good bloody war."

I needed to keep talking. If I didn't continue, he's just interrogate me later, and giving the story a personal touch made it more believable. I cracked a tired smile at the man, his eyes both cold and yet pitying. Everyone in this world seemed to be a paradox of how they were generally portrayed. It was strange.

"But, it burned down - just a few days before I left for Amestris, actually. My grandfather took it as a sign from Utka that I wouldn't be able to return if I left, but it was just an accident. During the Festival of Micky, the campfire sparks lit it up like a pile of old tinder." I had to stifle a smile and keep my somber expression. The idea of a group of people worshiping a giant anthropomorphic mouse was amusing.

"A few days later I caught a train south, jumped the border into Creta, spent a little time in Aerugo, and then booked it north through the South Area. I would have just come through the north, but the mountain and Fort Briggs is a pretty good deterrent, besides, I wanted to see a bit of the world - I'd never left Ire for anything more than a hunting trip before then."

"How did you get all the way to Central without getting caught? I mean, you did say you spent a while in Liore." I yawned, looking out the window.

"No offense, but you're border patrol is awful. And once I got to Liore I fit in pretty well. It is - or well, it was a smattering of different cultures and people, so they all ignored the little Drachman immigrant girl who never caused any trouble." I said, running a hand through my hair. "Though, once Letoism moved in, they were pretty quick to judge. At first I thought Father Cornello would be able to help me but his quote and quote 'miracles' had a bad energy to them."

"A 'bad energy'?" Hughes inquired as we headed into a tunnel. The dark of the underground passage only lit by the small, flickering, light bulbs. I shivered, the memory of my nightmare coming back for a moment.

"Yeah, it just didn't feel right. You know, something that puts you on edge and makes your insides turn and your heart feel frozen. That kind of bad energy." I relaxed a little as we exited the dark of the tunnel, natural sunlight streaming through the windows once more.

"So, I hitched a train up north. When I got to Central, I was a little distracted by how impressive - well, how imposing everything was. I...wasn't paying attention and I guess someone stole my belongings. I didn't have any money so I kind of just fell asleep in the park, then those soldiers found me and we went to the jail and bada bing bada boom here I am." Hughes was looking at me strangely, his brow furrowed with confusion. "What?"

"You use a lot of strange words," He noted, as I brought a hand self consciously to my lips. I forgot how out of place my 21st century lingo might seem to them. I smiled, scratching Lucha's head as he crawled out of the bag and onto the table.

"Sorry, I just picked up a lot of expression in my travels." I said with a laugh, once more turning to the window. We passed a small town, the people slow moving blurs in the distance from my train window. "Hey Hughes, why did you become a soldier?" I asked, half aware of what I was asking.

It had been bugging me for a while. He didn't seem like the soldier type - Hughes was more of a businessman or engineer, something that didn't have the prospect of death everyday. He had whole family to think of as well, so what were his motives for staying the job that could, and would if I didn't plan on interfering, end in his death?

"The same reason you risked your life to come all the way to Amestris," I looked up at him, confused.

"For modern medicine…?"

"No, Mac, for family." I looked down at the table, tracing the scratches in its polished finish.

"But Hughes," I asked, doing my best to recall his age and the start of the Ishvalan war. "If you did serve in the war, you must have joined the military academy before you were past twenty one. Was there a draft for normal soldiers as well as alchemists?" He shook is head, resting his chin on his clasped hands.

"There was someone I wanted to protect-"

"Gracia?" He nodded, though I felt a bit embarrassed by my interruption.

"Yes, and Elecia, though I didn't know until after I left for the war." I frowned, still not understanding entirely.

"But wouldn't you want to be with Gracia instead of risking your life? What if you never came back and Elicia never got to meet you?" Hughes shrugged, turning his gaze to the looming mid afternoon sun.

"It didn't cross my mind at the time, I wanted to protect the both of them. And if I needed to join the military then that's what I wanted to do. Knowing I was going to be a father, and having my adorable little angel with Gracia waiting for me only made my resolve to come back in one piece stronger."

My hand was once again drawn to the cross around my neck. My sister Mary had joined the military because she, well, she was very proud to be an American. Not necessarily your typical die hard redneck from the sticks - we grew up in New England after all - but she still had a bit of fire in her that made you wonder how she could possible be related to that quiet family that only ever said a word in her defense.

She had always said she joined the military because she loved her country, but part of me could now see that Mary wasn't just that one crazy aunt I'd keep my kids away from at parties. She really did just want to protect the people most important to her. I sighed, and laid my head down upon my crossed arms.

"You're an idiot Hughes," I closed my eyes briefly before looking up at his amused expression. "But you were an idiot for love, and so long as it doesn't get you killed, I guess I can tolerate it."

The train slowed as it approached its second stop - Geob. It was a pleasant little city, not too buy but not at all rural either. The train screeched to a halt, the crowded platform bustling with waiting passengers and families awaiting the train's arriving passengers. It took almost an hour for the train to leave the station - and today seemed as if it was going to take even longer.

The rain the past few days had delayed and closed trains, and with the new sunny weather of late summer setting in, I wasn't surprised so many people had waited until today to depart. I sighed, watching the passengers slowly get off, like bees lazily leaving the hive after a long winter.

Taking out the files of State Alchemists, I flipped through them for the billionth time when Hughes suddenly sat straight up in his seat, as if he was a meerkat on alert. He opened the window, much to my annoyance as the smell of smog and city air filled the once sterile, recirculated train car air.

"Hey, Jo!" He called out, waving at someone in the crowd. Since it didn't seem whoever he was talking to noticed, Hughes got out of his seat. "Come on, Mac."

'Why must everything be an adventure?' I thought, putting the files and Lucha in my bag before I let Hughes drag me along. His clear hazel eyes focused on something up ahead, something I couldn't see being vertically challenged.

"Where we going this time?" When we finally broke out of the masses of people, the narrow street was full of people going to and fro in between shops. Peering over the crowd - Hughes was really tall by the way, not NBA tall but still up there - the man saw whatever he was looking for and dragged me along. "Hey, Hughes, be careful. I'm not a ragdoll." He never answered my question as we rushed up to a ratty looking apartment building, the front door closing slowly behind someone.

"Hey, Jo don't go running off like that-" He stopped as we entered the building, the reception room crawling with unfriendly characters. Taking back what I said earlier, I held his hand tighter and nervously stood behind him, as if that would hide me from the stares and faces. Hughes was quiet for a moment, before ducking his head slowly and heading towards the receptionist.

She was a shapely woman, her dark hair loose and curled. I had to do a double take to make sure it wasn't Lust. It wasn't, her skin a few shades too pale and her lips more of a rose pink than blood red. The woman was also chewing tobacco - something I couldn't begin to imagine Lust ever doing.

"You need something?" Her name tag read Rebecca.

Hughes was in civilian clothes for the train ride - he complained that the uniform was too stiff to sleep in. That was probably the only reason her first question wasn't about us being cops. Still, he had that...air around him, one that made you aware he meant business and wasn't one to dabble in the illegal. That might have been all it took here.

"Yes, that man who just came in, what's his room number?" Her black eyes looked us up and down, or at least they looked Hughes up and down. I was still hiding behind him.

"You guys are with the military, aren't you?" Oh, there was the cop question. What came next surprised both Rebecca and I. Hughes leaned forward, took her chin in his hand, and gave her peck, not to mention he slid a few cenz over the counter.

"Nope," He responded, pulling back and smirking at the woman's shocked expression. I half expected an enraged boyfriend or partner to kill us then and there. Rebecca's surprised expression morphed into one I could only define as impressed.

"Room 342, though he's never there." She said, blowing a kiss towards Hughes as we nodded and headed up the staircase. He turned to me sternly, glaring down at me as I let loose a giggle.

"Never, tell Gracia about that." I shoved him gently, an easy feat in the narrow stairwell. He gave a groan of worry, running a hand through his hair. I chuckled as we roamed through the quiet and dusty halls.

"Hey, you keep my secrets and I'll keep yours, capice?" He gave me that eyebrow wiggle of amusement that was followed by a short laugh.

"The words you use Mac, the words you use…" Sorry, I had forgotten my highschool Italian was showing. Would he have preferred angry German or unintelligible Irish Gaelic? I continued to argue this point against him in my head until I almost walked into him as he suddenly stopped at a door. The numbers 342 were carved into it, jagged and lopsided. "This is the place," He breathed, looking at the cracked ceiling for a moment.

"Um, Hughes, who are we chasing after? Who's Jo?" I asked, finally having a moment of peace to inquire about our sudden detour. The man lifted a hand to knock, glancing down at me for a moment.

"An old friend," He knocked three consecutive times as he said this. There was dull shuffle from within the room.

"Go away," A muffled voice whined, sounding almost annoyed with the interruption. I rolled my eyes, glancing at the clock. We were going to miss the train if we didn't hurry this up. I took a turn to rap on the door's thin wooden surface.

"Open the door, Jo. Hughes won't tell me who you are and we're going to miss the train-" The door opened, and my fist met the unfortunate face of whoever opened it. I instinctively closed my eyes for a moment, expecting a harsh response. "Sorry!"

When none came, and Hughes moved past me to embrace the person, I opened my eyes. The man looked absolutely disgusted with the hug, but didn't say anything. He was clean shaven, and his apartment looked well taken care of compared to the rest of the building. The man wore a pair of wire rimmed circular glasses, and his black hair was combed back neatly.

"Nice to see you again, Jo!" I looked back and forth between Hughes and the man - Jo I guessed his name was. "Mac, this is Jo - this is Mac, she and Elicia and Gracia get along so well, oh that reminds me, have you seen these new pictures of my little angel-"

"What do you want Hughes?" Jo grumbled angrily, walking inside the apartment. Hughes seemed offended, comically placing a hand over his heart and gasping.

"I just wanted to show you the new dress Elicia is wearing at her birthday party - you will be there won't you?" I was so confused. Who was Jo? Why was Hughes inviting him to the party? What was going on?

"If that's all then leave, I'm not going all the way to Central for the kid's party. I'll send her a card, okay?" Jo sat down on the ancient couch, dust flying up. I sneezed, bringing unwanted attention in my direction. "What's with the kid? She's not military - nevermind, just get out. Nice to see you again, but scram." Hughes ignored the request and sat next to Jo on the couch.

"Rude much," I said under my breath, checking the clock outside in the hallway once more. We were really going to be late. "Hey, Hughes, let's get going -" He and Jo were talking in hushed voices on the couch, Hughes' hazel eyes sharp and cold in the dim light. I hung my head as the minutes ticked away.

Who was Jo anyways? I decided to find out, sitting in a soft armchair and eavesdropping. However, I was rather bad at eavesdropping despite my acting skills, so Hughes immediately brightened up after I sat down.

"Mac, have you ever seen a chimera?" I shook my head, swatting at Lucha's own as he tried to escape the bag - I didn't want him getting lost in this building. "Come on, Jo wants to show you his lab!" I tilted my head to the side, thinking...chimeras...Jo…

"Johann Adlersflügel?" I asked, looking to the two men for an explanation. "What's going on Hughes? Why the secret agent sneaky stalker stuff? Who is Jo in relation to my existence beyond a possible target of a serial killer?" The man just laughed, Jo looking embarrassed for him.

"Jo's my little brother," Hughes finally said, giving Jo a 'noogie' as my brother Matt would give my younger brother Aiden.

"By three minutes."

"Doesn't matter, you're still younger."

It was going to take a while to process this information. I knew my existence would screw things up, but a whole new person introduced to the story? Not to mention Hughes didn't have a twin canonically! Ugh, I really needed to talk with Truth. Something besides these new revelations was bothering me.

"If you two are twins, why is Johann's last name different?" I asked, trying not to let my disbelief bleed into my words. They were nothing alike; except maybe in their build and face, but Johann's eyes were a shade or two lighter and he had less facial hair.

"I'll tell you some other time, but seriously you have to see his lab - Jo's a bit of a nerd," Hughes said, dragging me out of the apartment as Jo followed, a small smile of amusement twitching his lips as I nearly tripped over Hughes going down the narrow staircase.

Rebecca waved as we left the building, blowing another kiss at Hughes who flushed with embarrassment. Johann led us through the streets, not any less busy than they were earlier. We had been walking for only a few blocks when a clock somewhere in town rang twelve times.

"Hughes, we missed the train." I said anxiously, reaching into my bag and hauling out Lucha. He nipped at my fingers, reminding me it was past his lunch time. Having no food to give him, I simply held him in the crook of my arm until he stopped squirming and watched the passing hordes in a silent assessment of his next meal. Not that he could actually eat a person, he just liked to think he could.

"We'll get one tomorrow." I looked at him in horror.

"You expect me to sleep in there? In that crappy hotel?" I asked softly, noticing to my dismay that Johann had overheard me. He didn't say anything, only momentarily glancing at me before purposefully walking faster. Hughes looked down at me, a smile on his face.

"Yep," I groaned, but did not further comment - I didn't want to offend Johann more than I already had.

We finally came to run down storage facility of sorts, the hot afternoon sun beating down on us as Johann fiddled with the key to open the heavy metal doors. Without air conditioning, it was going to be an oven in there. I had realized air conditioning units had not been invented yet at the grocery shop - the beans went bad after only a few days in the excessive heat of the back room.

However, upon stepping into the dark building, i discovered it to be pleasantly cool. The air was moist, bringing my thoughts to mold, but I had no time to dwell on that possibility as Lucha spasmed inside my bag, sneezing up a storm. It seemed to make Johann nervous.

"What kind of cat is that?" He asked with a weak laugh as we trailed through the empty corridors. This place was almost as bad as Command in its labyrinth's complexity.

"The kind that's a ferret." I responded quietly, a stiff smile finding its way to my face.

Why was this so awkward? He was just some guy. Well, a guy who wasn't supposed to be involved in the story. But who knew? Maybe this happened all along and it was just never shown? For the first time since I arrived here, I honestly didn't have a clue to my next move.

I didn't even know if he was a friend or a foe. Sure, Hughes trusted him enough - but Johann was his brother, and it wouldn't be surprising for a betrayal or two to surface. And from the sounds of it Johann and Maes weren't exactly the closest or most in touch brothers.

"A what?" Johann asked, small snort of laughter. I scowled in his general direction as we stopped at a large metal door with a padlock.

"It's a weird fuzzy snake, what's it to you?" I growled back in response as Hughes' brother unlocked the door.

"Keep it in the bag, you don't want one of these guys catching it." The clean shaven man said, flipping a light switch to illuminate the large room. There were fours cages, each big enough for a big dog to live in.

But instead of Irish Wolfhounds and American Staffordshire Bull Terriers there were large, strangely marked cats. Their fur came to hard scale like formations, as if they had been caked in mud. Their eyes too, were strange. They were slitted beyond normal, and sat higher up on the animal's skull. The skull itself was elongated, stretching beyond a normal length as if it had been run over by a steamroller.

"I'm seeing crocodilian and big cat cross - what are they?" I asked, standing a good distance from the cages. Two cages held one of the cat-croc chimeras each. Both paced anxiously back and forth, one giving a gargled growl, snarling and hissing at our arrival. The other two cages separated four smaller chimeras, two in one and two in the other. The smaller chimeras were sleeping, or dead, from the looks of it. The floors of the cages were littered with straw for bedding.

"I made them from - you guessed it - a crocodile and a lynx." Johann said, walking over to a desk and avoiding the large circles of chalk on the floor. Hughes had wandered over to one of the cages, whistling at the sleeping baby chimeras.

"Where did you find a lynx this big?" I asked. The animals were longer than I was tall, and could easily take down a man with their sheer weight and muscle.

"The size is from the crocodiles - there's a river in the desert area between Xing and Amestris that's crawling with them. Longer than cars!" I nodded, not recalling a riving in the desert but deciding to blame it on my lack of extensive study.

It would have been nice if I had at least gotten a warning before being whisked away into a world of hellfire and cold baths.

"So, I'm not expert in alchemy, or biology, but why would you combine a reptile with a mammal? One lays eggs and the other gives birth to live young - not to mention the chromosomal difference that would make the sex cells all mixed up. Wouldn't it have been easier to at least use animals within the same class, or even the same family to make it a bit easier for them to reproduce." I inquired, looking over the chimera before me. It was one of the adults, but it lay still as it watched me with its flickering gold and green eyes. Behind me Johann gave a short chuckle of amusement.

"That would be no fun, besides, if it was possible to do with two entirely different classes, then it is possible to mate pairs within the class." I gave a vague nod, still entranced by the chimera's rainbowed eyes. They really were beautiful.

"Let me get this straight - you risked your life and career to get some crocs, managed to find some lynxes from who knows where, and instead of making hybrids or something to experiment with first, you put all of your resources, time, and effort into an experiment that could have gotten your killed or been a fruitless waste of time." Johann nodded, Hughes cracking a smile in my direction.

"You can see why we aren't quite as, well, in touch as we should be." Hughes said, one of the baby chimeras stumbling over to him and letting out pathetic squeaks and mewls.

"So, what are you doing for this year's assessment?" I asked, feeling queasy at the thought of Mr. Tucker's chimera. Johann flipped through some documents on his overflowing and cluttered desk.

"I plan on breeding one of the lynx-crocodiles with a different chimera. It should be possible, I just need to make the new chimera and test my research." I looked up, the thought of Nina and Alexander resurfacing.

"What kind of chimera?" I asked, careful not to step on the large transmutation circles on the floor. Another thing I never really understood - how the hell could a human being draw such a perfect circle?

"I''m thinking maybe a mammal with an amphibian? Or maybe another reptile, I plan on going to Xing and seeing their frogs - if I could cross one of those with a bear maybe or one of the wolves up north it'd have an interesting result." I looked at the sketches of the possible chimeras Johann had drawn.

Unlike I, the man was one hell of an artist. The animals looked as if they had jumped out of the pages of a fantasy book, with tails and scales and manes and claws, but they were so realistic they almost looked as if they'd bite you for getting too close.

As if on cue with that thought, Hughes shrieked and fell back from the cage, the small chimera hissing and rolling instinctively, but the frightened man managed to snatch his hand out of the beast's death grip.

"You going to make it Maes? Should we buy you a new hand at Walm- I mean at the general store?" I asked sarcastically, though I really was concerned if he was hurt. Judging by the lack of puddling blood and pained screams, it couldn't be that awful.

"My hand will be fine Mac," The older man huffed, holding his injured hand to his chest before feigning a mortal wound. "But your words have injured my heart beyond repair, tell Gracia that I'm sorry, and tell my angel Elicia daddy loves her."

I felt my heart squeeze in my chest and the blood drain from my face. Those were pretty close to his last words. Neither of the brothers seemed to notice my miniature panic attack, Johann rolling his eyes and neatening up his desk as far as it could be neatened and his older brother doubled over from a fake wound and real laughter. These two were going to drive me nuts.

Back at the hotel, I drank whatever milk Johann had in the icebox (I had called it a refrigerator when we first got back and no one seemed to understand what the hell I was talking about). I called the couch, since there was only one bed and I didn't want to force either of them to sleep in the old armchair that looked as if it had a family of rats inside of it.

The couch turned out to be a big mistake. The couch was always shifting under my weight, and the dust from it kept me constantly prepared for an eruption of coughing and hacking. On another note, the walls were thin as paper, and I could hear the neighbor doing someone, which wasn't helping my inability to get any sleep.

Johann was going to be an interesting character if he was going to be involved. He could confuse the homunculi if he decided to show up in Central, but that could put him in danger. Johann and Maes didn't seem to get along well, and from the sounds of it he had cut himself off from the family with his work, which meant he had little to lose beyond his own life if he did get involved.

You see, I really wanted to tell someone about what I knew. It was starting to eat me alive. I would see the characters, now flesh and blood people, and just want to evacuate them all out of the country. Even random strangers I'd want to run up to and tell them to get out while they still could. Having the knowledge to change the future was overwhelming beyond belief.

And now, with people like Johann and Rebecca, I was starting to question why I was only planning to help a few people when I should have been running an underground railroad of sorts to get as many people out of Amestris before the Promised Day. If the guilt of not telling people the horrible fates that would inevitably catch up with them didn't kill me first, the strangers who were so ignorant to the oncoming shit storm might drive me insane.

"Truth, I need to talk to you, now," I whispered into the darkness, the shadows cast by the moon's light moving and twisting into shapes by the help of my imagination. "A sign, anything would be nice." I asked the darkness. Nothing came. No reply, not even Lucha bothered to wake up. He had gorged himself on a few biscuits Johann had in the apartment and passed out in sheer joy.

Disappointed, I laid back down slowly, careful not to stir up any dust that would send me into a spiraling asthma attack. Closing my eyes, I listened to the people making love next door, the argument over kids in the next room, and the quiet murmur of people downstairs as they discussed the upcoming drug sale next week on Hoadly street.

They were all living, breathing human beings. They had the potential to do good, bad, and act on instinct. They all knew more about how to ask for a beer than I knew how to not ask where the nearest Walmart was. And yet I knew more about their world than they ever would. It's a very lonely thing, knowledge. Very cold, very blunt, and very lonesome.

Masterlist

#fullmetal alchemist #fullmetal alchemist brotherhood #si/oc #fanfic #fanfiction #writing #bbb writes #bbb #bluebookbadger

1 note · View note

gearsfics · 6 years

Text

Songsword - Why you don't let a lab rat cook alone

Summary: Mira and Jason work on a school project together.

Note: This pairing is the same as Fallen Angel, this is just me playing around with things that I can’t in FA. This will be more violent and darker than FA, but you don’t have to read that for this. The AU I’m playing with is one I was playing with in a marvel setting. Instead of her falling in with a certain crew out of NYC, Mira’s dropped into Gotham, but still falling for the bad boys it seems…

Also posted: Here

“Sure there aren’t others who would want to work with you?” She was still hiding partially behind the guitar body, which on closer inspection, Jason could see the little etchings on the body. Cacti and foxes, a combo that fit her Texan accent. He couldn’t help but smile a little at that, even if her pale skin screamed a child that probably spent way too much time inside.

"Not really, look, I’d understand if you don’t want a partner, just thought that it would help both of us.”

She shook her head. “No, it’s okay. I just thought that I was an annoyance in class, it’s why the others didn’t want me in their groups.”

-- A year later --

Jason watched the new girl as she sat in the empty music room, sitting in the windowsill, the guitar in her lap. He had seen the twelve year old around school the last few weeks, she was smart, and despite the bullies starting in on her, she managed to not let them get under her skin.

It was part of the reason he kept an eye on her, to make sure she didn’t get into too much trouble, after all, this wasn’t a small town.

“Well I guess you left me with some feathers in my hand Did it make it any easier to leave me where I stand? I guess there might not be too many who would stand beside you now Where'd you come from? Where am I going? Why'd you leave me 'till I'm only good for...“

-- Angels of the silences - Counting Crows - Recovering the Satellites

Her voice was soft as she sang the words, playing on the guitar that was in her lap. He now knew why the chorus girls wished she would join the choir, she had a great voice, even if the music wasn’t something he’d normally listen to. It was far too soft, he preferred a bit of a beat.

She was so focused on what she was doing, she didn’t realize she had an audience, Jason had moved into the room, and two other students had taken his place at the door. Jason at least waited until she was done before speaking. He didn’t want to distract the artist after all. “I was wondering where you disappeared to for lunch.”

The petite pale girl with the silvery blonde hair yelped hugging the black guitar closer to her. “I, I asked and the teacher said it was okay.” She blushed a little hiding behind the guitar, as if ashamed to be caught there. seeing him, then the two at the door she wanted to hide behind her guitar. She didn’t think that she was good enough for more than her teacher to hear her, even though somehow there were the rumors she could sing flying around.

Jason knew part of the skittishness of the girl was the fact she was the smallest in most of their classes, and the quietest, though hearing her speak, he was already wishing she spoke more. The accent was adorable.

Jason smiled. “Easy, I was just looking for you because I was hoping the offer was still holding up. You know for the lab partner in science?” His grades had been slipping a little, though he could blame it on having to skip school a lot lately to take care of his mother. Though the group assignment would boost his grade if he could find a partner.

"Not really, look, I’d understand if you don’t want a partner, just thought that it would help both of us.”

She shook her head. “No, it’s okay. I just thought that I was an annoyance in class, it’s why the others didn’t want me in their groups.”

Jason frowned at that, the kid was younger, but she had proven she was just as tough as any of the other kids in their class. “I think they’re just jealous because you’re smarter than they are.” He stepped into the room and she bit her lip a moment. “You think we can start on it tonight?”

“I have time before Dad gets off work. Should we meet somewhere in town?”

“Think we can meet at the library?” It was a safe place at least. Jason knew it wasn’t far from more protected areas f town, places where she’d be safe. Last thing he wanted was to suggest his place, never knew if his mom was having a bad day, and keeping her from Crime Alley would be a good idea, probably earn him bonus points with her cop father.

“Sure, four thirty okay? I have a class after school, my aunt got me into them and I don’t want to disappoint her. Will also give me time to drop Luce here off at the apartment.”

“Your guitar has a name?” He smiled at that.

She nodded. “Lucifer,” She responded. “Because of reasons.” Her free hand went up to the necklace she wore, a small white gold cross with a crystal. Jason noticed there was a pair of rings hanging on the same chain, wedding band and engagement ring, she was far too young to be married.

“I’m sorry.” He looked away, the ring had to belong to her mother, they were too small for a man.

She let go of the cross. “You don’t have to be. The man that took her, isn’t going to hurt anyone else, Papa made sure of it.” She looked down, she stopped herself from saying more as the bell rank to let the kids know they had to get to class. “Four thirty at the library, right?”

Jason nodded. “I’ll be there.” He watched as she started to put the guitar away. The tidbit she had let slip, made him think about his own mother, she wasn’t always the best, but at least she was still there.

Waiting for you All my sins... I said that I would pay for them if I could come back to you All my innocence is wasted on the dead and dreaming

Jason wasn’t expecting Mira as she was dressed. Her pale hair was twisted up held in place with a purple ribbon. She was dressed in leggings and a leotard, over which she was wearing a baggy purple hoodie. He had been waiting outside and had seen her get out of a fancy black car.

“Aunt June really, it’ll be fine, Papa said he’d pick me up, and really, we’re two blocks from where he works, I can walk there.” She smiled hefting her backpack from the seat floor.

“I just worry dear. Oh, is that your classmate?” The woman was probably about fifty, and was looking past her as Jason stood from the steps, feeling a little underdressed in jeans and a red tee with his black hoodie.

Mira was looking at him and turned to the car nodding. “He’s in a few classes. Now, don’t you have to get to the restaurant? I think you were saying something about your cook making a mess of the menu?” She smiled. “I’ll be fine.”

Jason had managed to walk up to them. “Mira, you didn’t tell me you were June Edwards niece.” He only knew the woman’s face because his mother had worked there for about a week. It had been on good days, and the place had just opened. “Mom raves about how good the food is there.” He added.

“Aunt June’s been teaching me how to cook too. But, yes, I don’t want everyone at school to know okay? They’d hound me for some of the deserts.”

June laughed at that. “Right, I need to get going. Remind your father to stop by this weekend okay? And, if you want to bring your friend along, I’m sure the more the merrier.”

Mira blushed as she drove away.

“Do I want to know?”

“She’s having a get together with her high society associates, and wants me there. I told her I’d go if we finish our school project.” She looked at him. “It’s okay if you don’t want to go, the party is Saturday.”

“I, don’t even have a suit.”

That had her giggle. “It would be all adults, and boring, so if you’re okay with me using you as an excuse to not go I’d appreciate it. Will even throw in lunch on Saturday. That is if you don’t mind pizza. I don’t cook that day, Papa just orders fast food, it’s been our tradition since I was four.”

“You’re inviting me over?”

“The project is due monday, may as well build what we need to at one house. Unless you want me to go to yours?”

He shook his head. “No, that’s okay.” He smiled. “Let’s see what we’ll have to do in the first place.”

She nodded walking with him into the library. As she walked she tugged the ribbon out of her hair.

“It looked cute.”

“Makes me look like a little kid. Aunt June agreed to me picking lessons as long as they were something dignified. I may have cheated a little, true, it’s kind of dancing, but fencing is a bit more than ballet with swords.”

He chuckled at that. “So you’re a musician who doesn’t like dancing?”

“I don’t like the ballet, it’s a little boring for me. Momma liked the ballet though, I went to them for her, now…” She shook her head. “Doesn’t matter, we’re here for our science class right?”

“Right.” He nodded. “Any ideas?”

“Not a volcano, I made one of those with Papa for fourth grade. Maybe, something more technical. I could see if we can borrow some tools from the crime lab if we need to.”

Jason balked at that. “How about we see what we can do without police involvement.”

“Don’t like the police?”

He shook his head. “I’ve gotten into trouble a few times.” He’d leave it at that. The fact he hadn’t done time in juvie was proof that he could at least lie his way out of a situation if needed.

“I don’t care for most of them here, little shady, though Papa’s good, and his boss is cool.” She smirked. “So, what do you want to do?”

“How about something kitchen related?”

“Then we need cookbooks. Aunt June could help too if we need it. Though I’m not bad in a kitchen on my own. At least if it’s something we don’t need an oven for.” She bit her lip a little.

“So, how about something sweet?”

“Candy?”

“We can do different sugar solutions see which makes crystals better?”

Mira stuffed the ribbon into her pocket, her pale hair cascading over her shoulders. “Each solution a different color, we’d need to figure out how much sugar to use, it would be cutting it close for the assignment.” She thought a moment. “Might be a little too close, since most would take a little longer than two weeks. She wants some results in a week.”

“So, something else?” He agreed, the two kept their conversation low as they found the cookbooks.

Every night these silhouettes appear above my head Little angels of the silences that climb into my bed and whisper Every time I fall asleep Every time I dream "Did you come? Would you lie? Why'd you leave us 'till we're only good for...

Hank found Jason and Mira in a back corner of the library. Both had books open, taking notes from them and talking quietly. As soon as Jay noticed Hank there he sat up a little straighter.

Mira turned smiling. “Hi Papa,” She realized the windows they were near were dark. “Oh, we’re late aren’t we?”

Hank smiled nodding. “It’s okay sweetie, you and your friend get work done?”

“Yes sir.” Jason admitted. “We also have a shopping list, we just need the time to go get everything.”

“Well, let me take a look at it when we get home okay Princess,” He held out his hand to Jason. “Please, you’re a schoolmate of Mir’s. Call me Hank.”

Jason looked at him, the man’s face was hard, but not in the angry way most of the cops he had dealt with had been, it was more weathered. His eyes though, he had kind eyes, either he didn’t know Jason’s past, which he hadn’t told Mira any of, most of the people that knew him kept their mouths shut about that, or he just didn’t care.

“Seems weird to be calling you that sir.”

“Then Detective Greason works if you have to be formal. You have a ride?”

Jason shook his head. “I only live a few blocks away, I can walk.”

“Nonsense, I’ll take you home, gives me a chance to see what kind of people my daughter hangs out with.”

Mira blushed at that. “Dad, it’s okay, we’ll have to work on our project on Saturday. unless you really want to go to Aunt June’s party.”

“Ugh, no way. Those high society things she throws have terrible food. Besides it’s pizza night. You like pizza?”

Jason nodded.

“Good, then I’ll order three, with all the toppings. Hot wings too.”

Mira was grinning at that. “Spicier the better. Though no where here has them as good as Carlos’ back home.”

Waiting for you" All my sins... I said that I would pay for them if I could come back to you All my innocence is wasted on the dead and dreaming

Jason leaned back on the couch. Hank had put on a movie until the game came on. Jason was actually enjoying the movie, even though Mira had rolled her eyes, apparently she had seen it a few times.

“You like football boy?” Hank asked as Mira walked off.

“It’s okay,” Jason wondered if this was some kind of family thing. Though wasn’t like anything he had experienced before.

“Darn, was hoping you could tell me how good the Knights are during the game. Guess we can both figure it out eh?” Hank knew the Knights were playing a team out of Pennsylvania and were down a field goal. Mira had gone into the kitchen to check on their experiment. They were making five identical looking cakes, and were going to ask the students in class to taste test them, one was done perfectly, one had too much sugar, one too much salt, and the other two had different flavors, white chocolate and jalapeno pepper. They were going to see how color played into how people perceived food as well as why proper ingredients were key.

Though Mira had made some of the batter into cupcakes for herself, Jason, and her dad, just so that they knew they wouldn’t be poisoning anyone in class.

"I looked you up kid. I don’t mind you hanging out with Mira, but I want to ask you to not drag her into anything you’re into okay?”

Hank’s words had him look over at the man. “Sir?”

“Your juvie record’s worse than mine was at your age, but I get it. This town.” He gave a small grin. “And I mean it, you get her involved and I won’t go easy on you.”

Jason glanced back where Mira was humming softly to herself as she pulled out the things she needed for frosting.

“She’s helping me keep my grades up,” He turned back to Hank. “I’ll do what I can to keep her out of trouble.”

“Then go help her with the frosting while I call for dinner.” The smiling jovial look was back with the man.

Jason found he didn’t want to risk seeing how the threat was. So far, Hank had been nice, better than any of the other cops he had met. And he hadn’t told him to leave yet. Jason figured it might be better to have a friend in uniform than all the enemies he had.

“Papa, where did you put the food coloring? We need this frosting to be blood red.”

“Isn’t that a little bright?”

“Well brown wouldn’t look as good, and Aunt June made us sugar glass bottles to put on it. If we’re going to scare people with this, may as well go over the top.”

Hank laughed. “Not sure if I like the idea of you putting bottles on your cakes. Why don’t we save that for Halloween.”

“But Papa, that’s no fun. I wanted to watch Mrs Ekert faint.”

Jason actually laughed at her pout. “And people think I’m the one to watch out for. You might actually be more scary, wrapped up in that innocent cute look of yours.”

“Well, you vetoed us hiding a freeze dried spider in one of the cakes.”

“Because that sounds disgusting.”

She giggled. “Yeah, but can you see the look on the face of that neanderthal they have as our starting quarterback on the junior varsity team. He’d deserve it after tripping me the other day.”

“Remind me to never get you mad at me. You might give some of the local lunatics ideas.” Jason grinned though, it would be a little funny to watch some of the jocks in their class squirm some.

#Jason Todd #Robin #Fanfiction #fanfic #generic alien scifi #gearsinice fics #Songsword #songfic (kind of)

0 notes

sweetnestor · 7 years

Text

Story of Another Us | Week 8

university au, platonic af, now on ao3!

previous chapter | masterlist

Drowning beside you

“Wrote it down on the wall, she was screaming it out, Made it clear, she’s still here, are you listening now? Just a ghost in the halls, feeling empty, they’re vacant now…”

It was hard having to hear this song, much less sing it. But that was all I could do. It was one of the few songs that really captured exactly how I felt when it came to my relatives. I wasn’t singing it because I was going to post it on my channel, either. I was just trying to get out the bad feelings, but the more I sang it, the more I wanted to wallow.

“Hey Mom, hey Dad, when did this end? When did you lose your happiness? I’m here alone inside of this broken home…”

Sharing something so personal took its toll. I was crying on and off the days following when I uploaded that video. It felt like all these wounds had reopened and the bleeding would never stop. This was why I didn’t like talking about it. It just felt like all the pain was endless. I was thinking about how I felt when I was sixteen and suicidal, when I was twenty one and teetering on the edge. I could still feel my parents’ harsh words like it was yesterday. So I kept singing.

Externally, though, I tried to remain normal. I tweeted random crap, posted my MOTDs on Instagram, and played around with Snapchat filters like nothing was wrong. I still attended classes, usually after a small push from Mark or Jack. But everything felt weird. I felt incredibly vulnerable in front of them now. I mean, Mark knew about my family situation, but he didn’t know that I was suicidal for a period of time. Obviously, Jack didn’t know either, yet he was the first person I told. I wasn’t sure why that was.

A knock on my door interrupted my sad singing. Before I could even grant access, Jack walked in.

“You’ve had that song on repeat for a while,” he told me. “Are you sure you want to keep torturing yourself like this?”

I looked down at my keyboard and shrugged.

Jack approached me and placed his hand on my shoulder. “You need to get out of your room, okay? Can we do that?”

I nodded lightly and got up. He was easy to listen to. Despite how loud and vulgar he was on camera, he was very gentle when he needed to be.

“Good, now give me a hug,” he said, opening his arms.

I obliged and wrapped my arms around his middle. He really did give good hugs.

“You’re not there anymore, Bella,” he told me, rubbing my back. “You never have to be in that place again.”

God, he was going to make me cry again. I took a deep breath, choosing not to respond to his words.

“Let’s do something fun!” he suggested when we parted. “You wanna do your makeup?”

I wrinkled my nose and shook my head. That’s when you know something is wrong. Makeup was my happy place, and I didn’t even want anything to do with it in this state of mind.

“You wanna do my makeup?” he asked without missing a beat.

It sounded exhausting, having to pick up brushes, putting things on his face. Exhausting, but interesting. I had a somewhat thoughtful look on my face, and that was enough for Jack. He dragged me over to the bathroom and stood me in front of the counter where all my makeup was.

“Make me look beautiful! I want the cat eyes and the, the contour!” he said, sounding very much like his online self.

I gave a small smile, but wordlessly began to look through my products. I was opening up different palettes, looking through foundations, and picking out my cleanest brushes. I kept looking at Jack’s face, trying to imagine different eye looks on him.

“Your hair is green, but your eyes are blue,” I said in thought.

“Is that bad?” he asked in response.

“Some people might say it’ll make a lot of colors clash,” I told him. “But I’ll just use whatever the fuck I have.”

I grabbed an eyeshadow primer and one of my Too Faced palettes. I hadn’t done another person’s makeup since I stopped booking clients. I actually liked the feeling, It came almost naturally. I appreciated that Jack was letting me do this.

“Why do you always start with the eyes?” he asked as I sweeped neutral shades over his lids.

“It makes cleaning up fallout a lot easier,” I replied. “So you don’t ruin any foundation or concealer under your eyes.”

Speaking of, it was a challenge to find a perfect match for Jack. I was darker than him, so many foundations in my collection didn’t match his skin tone. Too pink, too dark, too warm! Eventually I decided to just dot one of my concealers all over his face and blended it in.

“So why do you have to have a lighter concealer?” he asked. He was full of questions.

“To look more awake. You can also use it to highlight different features of your face.”

“And now you have to find something even lighter to highlight me?”

I sighed. “Yup.”

I took my time on his face. The warm colors I used really accentuated his blue eyes, and I grew slightly envious of his long eyelashes. Due to that, and the fact that his eyes were ridiculously sensitive, I had to skip out on false lashes. Then, I added bronzer, blush, and highlighter to his face, making his cheeks stand out and chiseling out his features.

“Can you make something of those caterpillars?” he asked when it came to doing his eyebrows.

Are you questioning my skills?” I asked in response.

“No, never! You’re the master here!”

It wasn’t the easiest task, but I did it. Wish I could say that about my anxiety.

I finished off the look with a dark berry lip. It was a little bizarre to see Jack with a full face of makeup, but he looked incredible, and I was very satisfied with the result.

“Whoa!” he exclaimed when he looked in the mirror. His mouth was open in shock, and he was moving his head around so different parts of his face caught the light. “This is so weird…”

“Does it look good, though?” I asked.

“Of course! I’ve never looked better!” he said, posing dramatically, pouting his lips as he looked at his reflection. Then he went off to take a bunch of selfies.

I wasn’t sure if he let me use his face as a distraction or if he genuinely liked what I did. Either way, it got my creative juices flowing, and I really wanted to film a bunch of videos at once. I took out my phone and jotted down some ideas in my notes, hoping that this sudden spark of creativity would last long enough.

“Hey, do you wanna help me make a video sometime?” I asked as I followed his path out to the living room.

“We could do it now, if you want,” he replied as he snapped more photos of himself.

“I’d like to now, but I don’t have the proper materials.” I leaned against the doorway, still looking down at my phone. I hit the home button and was brought back to my main screen. My wallpaper was a picture of Perrie Edwards, and it suddenly rang a bell in my head.

Jack and I were at The Tube, tipsy and giggly as ever. I remembered us bouncing simultaneously in our seats to the music playing. I knew it was a Little Mix song, I just couldn’t put my finger on it.

“Hey, do you remember what song was playing at The Tube that one time?” I asked. “Do you remember at all how it went?”

“He was just a dick and I knew it!” Jack sang without missing a beat.

“Hair!” I exclaimed, finally clicking with it. “I remember! Mark fucking hates that song!”

“Yeah, you were telling me about it until he picked us up!”

I giggled but suddenly froze when we heard a knock on the door. However, I inhaled deeply and turned on my heel to go answer it. This was something I didn’t typically do. If I got a package in the mail, I waited until the mailman was gone. If it was any friend or acquaintance, or even Mark, they would have to text me when they’re at the door. But I just opened the door with very little hesitation. Luckily, it was Mark, Matt, and Ryan. They each were carrying a rather large box with three different cosmetic brand names on them.

“You answered the door!” Mark pointed out, sounding pleasantly surprised.

“I know right!” I replied.

“You got some packages sent to my house,” he explained, holding up the box he was holding. “Thought that would boost your morale, so we brought them over. And there’s more in the car.”

I moved to the side so the three of them could enter. They went to the living room and placed the boxes on the coffee table. Jack was standing in front of the sliding door, and he dramatically turned to face the boys, placing his hands on his hips.

“Hi boys!” he greeted flamboyantly.

“Holy shit, what happened to you?” Matt asked him in shock.

“What did you do?” Mark asked me.

“I was sad, so he let me put makeup on him,” I replied simply.

“And now I look beautiful!” Jack exclaimed as Ryan said “Gay!” over him.

I resisted rolling my eyes as he went to get the rest of the boxes. Then I sat down on the couch and gazed at the ones on the table. High end companies knew who I was? How?

“Why did they send these?” I wondered, completely blown away.

“‘Cause you’re great,” Mark said as he sat down next to me.

Again, I resisted rolling my eyes as I opened up the first bright pink box. There were several eyebrow pencils and gels in pretty silver packaging. The next box was black and inside were several shades of foundation and concealer, which was perfect for one of my video ideas. The last box was white and had an assortment of liquid lipsticks, eyeliners, and eyeshadows. I kept my excited squealing to a minimum so as to not seem ridiculous in front of the guys.

“I have no idea where to start,” I said, “but I’m gonna need volunteers.”

“Nope!” Matt quickly snapped as he dashed into the kitchen.

“He’s going first,” Mark reassured.

Needless to say, I felt better once I was surrounded by makeup and my boyfriend. I was happy that Jack was happy with his new look, and even more that he posted about it on Instagram. I even snagged my own photos of him and explained the details on my profile.

That pretty much marked the end of my little depressive episode. I explained it all to my therapist, and she continued to help me with coping. I was still a loner, having only Jack as my one true friend besides Mark. I was just learning to be okay with it. As long as you have one friend, you should be okay. As long as I had those two guys in my life, I felt like I had a shot at being okay again. I was hoping that I could get through this.

Hoping. I had hoped...

______

next chapter

#jacksepticeye x oc #jacksepticeye x reader #markiplier x oc #markiplier x reader #soau #sweetheart writes #jack went live literally right as i decided to listen to the theme song to this fic aldkfjakdsjglkf #anyway shits gonna go down in the next chapter

19 notes · View notes