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swearwolf-writes · 3 years

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Merlin: Magic for the Masses

bcs magic isn't evil and this is my personal comfort fic

[CROSSPOSTED ON: AO3]

Season 1

AGES:

MERLIN:17-18

ARTHUR: 20-21

MORGANA: 22-23

GWEN: 17-18 (YOUNGER THAN MERLIN BY MERE MONTHS)

MORDRED: ~10-11

The Dragon’s Call

Valiant

The Mark of Nimue

Gwen finds out Merlin has magic (bcs he somehow knew her father was better) and keeps his secret

The Poisoned Chalice

Gwen sees the scrying lights

Lancelot

A Remedy to Cure All Ills

The Gates of Avalon

Merlin talks to Morgana about her seer abilities and promises to keep her secret

The Beginning of the End

Uses magic to save Mordred

Helps Arthur smuggle Mordred away

Excalibur

The Moment of Truth

The Labyrinth of Gedreth

To Kill the King

Le Morte D’Arthur

6 MONTHS PASS

Season 2

AGES:

MERLIN: 18-19

ARTHUR: 21-22

MORGANA: 23-24

GWEN: 18-19 (A FEW MONTHS YOUNGER THAN MERLIN)

MORDRED: ~11-12

The Curse of Cornelius Sigan

The Once and Future Queen

The Nightmare Begins

Tells Morgana of his own magic and now they’re boys

He can help her to an extent but they both need some help and so want to go to the druids together (bcs she’s got magic and he’s somehow Emrys although she doesn’t know the name yet) but he has his duties with Arthur and so she goes alone

Merlin find her with the druids during the panic in Camelot

They keep each other’s secrets (even if she doesn’t know Merlin is Emrys just yet)

Lancelot and Guinevere

Beauty and the Beast

Arthur sees Merlin with the mirror and asks him how he got the mirror down there without any rope

And voila the moron’s magic is revealed and it is then that he realises Merlin uses his magic to save his butt whoops (but he doesn’t tell Arthur about Morgana’s abilities bcs that’s not his secret to tell)

But still doesn’t believe Merlin when he mentions that she’s a TROLL

The Witchfinder

Arthur kicked Merlin’s magic book under the bed and says it’s all clear bcs he doesn’t want anyone to be executed bcs no one got hurt with the magic and it was just a bit of fun

Merlin: “We know Aredian set Gaius up and then he’s coming after us-”

Arthur: “Us? Us who?”

Merlin: “I can’t say bcs that’s not my secret to tell”

Arthur: “If you know another sorcerer-”

Merlin: “Then what? What, you’ll execute them?”

Arthur: “I- I mean, no, but-”

Merlin: “But what? If it doesn’t matter with me then why should it matter if anyone has magic?”

The Sins of the Father

Morgana shows Merlin the bracelet Morgause gave her and he can feel the magic in it and lo and behold: she’s a sorceress too

Their mother, Lady Vivienne, was a sorceress and as was Morgause’s father that’s why Morgause was given to the High Priestess of the Old Religion but Uther thought that as Morgana had one non-magic parent, she would not develop abilities (he was wrong)

Merlin tells Arthur it was a lie to stop him killing his father but then reveals the truth once Arthur could not get to Uther and he also reasons that while it was Uther’s fault, no one was to blame as he didn’t know what’d happen (and was too headstrong to listen) and Nimue had no choice but to comply, on pain of death

The Lady of the Lake

Sweet Dreams

The Witch’s Quickening

Morgana tries to tell Merlin the plan but he stops her

Merlin: “I’m the future king’s manservant - plausible deniability is my only saviour right now. I will not aid you nor will I stop you but if I think innocents will get hurt, I will stop you.”

Morgana: “I would expect nothing else.”

Ignores Kilgharrah

Helps Mordred escape safely bcs he was innocent and brainwashed by a fanatic “I will not forget this”

Morgana tells him, after the fact, that she let the fanatic go bcs he just wanted to free magicfolk

They continue their training in private bcs insomnia via dragon

The Fires of Idirsholas

When Morgana sees Gwen sick, she tells Merlin about Morgause as soon as she gets the chance

Merlin tells Morgana about how she’s the source of the curse albeit unknowingly but the only way to save everyone is if she dies but they need to figure out how to save her so she took the hemlock and poisoned herself

It still hurt her bcs yk it’s poison so her telepathic pain was still a thing and Morgause came along and she took her after stopping the curse

The Last Dragonlord

1 YEAR PASSES

Season 3

AGES:

MERLIN: 20-21

ARTHUR: 23-24

MORGANA: 25-26

GWEN: 20-21 (A FEW MONTHS SHY OF MERLIN)

MORDRED: ~13-14

The Tears of Uther Pendragon 1

Merlin is so sorry that she had to poison herself and was so glad she was back

Arthur thinks there’s a thing between them meanwhile Morgana thinks there’s a thing between he and Arthur and Gwen

Morgana knocks the guard out and wipes his recent memories but she’s still not the best at her magic so he was just injured so Morgause spells him from afar to kill him bcs Morgana is not a murder even if she does hate Uther

Morgause: “You should have killed the guard”

Morgana: “I will not be like Uther and kill anyone who irritates me - he was in my way but simply following orders”

Morgause kidnaps Merlin but Morgana asks her not to kill him - he might just be a servant but he’s well-liked and popular - people will notice

The Tears of Uther Pendragon 2

Magic jokes with Arthur yay

Tense Mergana

Morgana: “You know I don’t wanna hurt you but this is to help our people so please don’t get in my way or whatever I have to do, I’ll do it.”

Merlin: “I’d expect nothing less”

More magic jokes with Arthur feat. armour

Morgana and Merlin fight in the crypt and use magic causing the ceiling to cave but Merlin saves her bcs “you’re my friend” but uses magic to break the staff while Morgana runs to safety and takes the credit to keep up appearances

Morgana: “sorry Merlin but our people come before us and they deserve better”

Merlin: “if that’s the case then why should our legacy to better ourselves begin with the massacre of innocents?”

Morgana: “it may be wrong but what other beginning do we have other than the slaughter of our own people, our women and children? Innocents weren’t supposed to get hurt but that was Cenred’s army not ours - the skeletals were only supposed to attack knights fighting us”

Goblin’s Gold renamed Gnome’s Gold

Gaius: “Gnomes are mischievous but not always dangerous in nature so long as they get what they want: gold. They have often been known as guardians of treasures, of mines and of precious stones.”

Merlin tells Arthur and Morgana about gnome!Gaius (separately)

Gets his butt kicked by Arthur when he sees that Merlin didn’t undo the donkey curse immediately

Merlin: “sorcerer’s magic and gnome magic are two very different things- how was I supposed to know it wouldn’t fully do the trick-”

Gwaine

Arthur: “I could’ve beaten them on my own Merlin, I didn’t need your help-”

Merlin: “well if not mine then certainly Gwaine’s at least-”

Arthur: “shut up, Merlin”

The Crystal Cave

Morgause is the one who was supposed to kill Uther bcs Morgana doesn’t want to kill anyone

Arthur gets her jewellery instead of a knife bcs Merlin actually tells him the prophecy

Morgause fails lmao

When Morgause tries to kill Merlin, she steps in and ends up needing the infirmary so Morgause runs

When Morgana and Merlin find out her lineage, they tell Arthur bcs ‘wtf?? I have a sister? You’re older so ig you’re the heir??’

The Changeling

Merlin tells Gwen and Arthur about lil changeling Elena and they’re like wait he/she knows??

Elena is a respectable thembo by the end of it all

The Castle of Fyrien

Merlin uses magic to light a campfire in front of Morgana, Gwen and Arthur to which again there’s the whole wait you know stuff

Morgana: “and you’re okay with it? After everything Uther says about magic users?”

Arthur: “I know Merlin and he has a good heart even if he is an idiot. And the druid boy wasn’t evil either, he was just a child. Merlin’s shown me that magic isn’t evil but instead just a tool and it’s the person using it incorrectly that should be punished rather than magicfolk as a whole.”

Morgana: “so you disagree with the ban on magic?”

Arthur: “So what if people use magic to do their chores faster? They’re not hurting anyone. It would be like condemning every person who’s ever owned a sword bcs they might hurt someone.”

Morgana: “how long have you known?”

Arthur: “since Father tried to marry a troll”

Morgana: “and you never said anything to anyone?”

Arthur: “it’s not my secret to tell”

She goes back to their side and saves Arthur from Morgause’s fire but it blows back and knocks her over so she wants to make sure her sister’s okay but gets pulled to safety by Merlin

~ later ~

Merlin: “Why did you save Arthur? You could’ve let him die and left Camelot without an heir but you saved him; why?”

Morgana: “bcs he protects you. If he was protecting a knight, I still wouldn’t trust him but you’re just a servant and yet he protects your life and our secret. Arthur is a good man and I don’t want any bloodshed - if we can give our people peace again with Arthur, I will stand by him.”

Merlin: “thank you.”

Morgana: “this does not mean I stand by Uther - I will still fight against his tyrannous ways every chance I get.”

Merlin: “I’d expect nothing less”

The Eye of the Phoenix

Morgause gives Arthur a bracelet while disguised as an old woman “for good luck on your journey” and Gwen sees her real face in a puddle

Tells Morgana about it and they, along with Gaius, look for some way to counter the spell (and thus Morgana reveals her magic to Gwen)

Love in the Time of Dragons

Merlin doth be a snitch but they believe Alice when she says she has no choice and they try and help her as best as they can (Arthur is a sweetheart to old people (no offence, Alice-))

Queen of Hearts

Morgause tries to break Arthur’s heart and cause the rift between father and son by manipulating a young sorcerer into doing all the stuff that gets Gwen tried for magic

Dragoon and Arthur deal with stuffs but this time, he knows it’s his personal dumbass

Morgana helps with the anti-aging potion for Merlin bcs magic squad!!

The Sorcerer’s Shadow

The Coming of Arthur 1

Sir Leon is made immortal (by accident) by the druids who save him with the Cup of Life

When Morgause finds out Leon lives, she finds out about the Cup

Gwaine catches Merlin trying to heal Arthur and thus finds out about his magic too

Morgause rules with an iron fist and threatens to kill her and everyone else if Morgana doesn’t become queen and her mouthpiece bcs “you betrayed me sister so your life means nothing to me. And these peasants are mere cockroaches - whether they live or die, I don’t care - in fact, if they die, our people could live here in Camelot but regardless, those poor, innocent villagers’ blood will be on your hands, sister. Now, yield.”

The Coming of Arthur 2

Gwen tells everyone of how Morgana is just as much a prisoner as she was

Morgana uses magic to help fight Morgause but hurts her and despite everything “she’s my sister - I abandoned her once, I will not do it again. I will ensure her safety and ours in the process - rule well, brother” and she leaves with her sister using magic

1 YEAR PASSES

Season 4

AGES:

MERLIN: 22-23

ARTHUR: 24-25

MORGANA: 27-28

GWEN: 22-23 (A FEW MONTHS SHY OF MERLIN)

MORDRED: ~15-16

Morgana becomes the High Priestess of the Triple Goddess

The Darkest Hour 1

Kara’s mother, Ealdgyð, was helping Morgause bcs Morgana was forced to leave her when she began attacking her, all faith in her younger sister lost

Morgana was back in Camelot but yk “I couldn’t kill her- she’s still my sister- I’m sorry”

Knowing how much Morgana hated him for the things he did still left Uther crippled, even upon her return

Ealdgyð opened the veil upon Morgause’s death and she, Merlin and Morgana all passed out and saw the vision

Emrys was Morgana’s destiny and Ealdgyð’s doom

Emyrs’ identity is protected from Ealdgyð (and later Kara) by the Triple Goddess bcs they may be followers of the Old Religion but they perverted the peaceful nature of druids and so lost that information which was most valuable to them

Agravaine, being loyal to Morgause, now reports to Ealdgyð and tells her about their plan

Merlin and Morgana both want to be sacrifices to the veil

Merlin: “it’s my destiny to protect Arthur”

Morgana: “but this was my sister’s doing and therefore it is my responsibility to undo”

The Darkest Hour 2

Morgana tries to heal Merlin from the Dorocha but is unable to

Morgana continues on the quest with the knights while Lancelot and Merlin go their own way

Agravain on Ealdgyð’s orders knocks out Gwen bcs she convinced the council to reduce rationing the lower towns

The Wicked Day

Merlin tries to save Uther for Arthur’s sake but Morgana refuses to try

Morgana (to Arthur): “I am sorry you’re losing your father but he literally massacred our people - I will not save him”

Uther still dies but they noticed the pendant and want to find and take Ealdgyð’s head but they don’t know who she is bcs she’s smart

Arthur: “Magic will one day live freely in Camelot once more but not today - it is easier to find one sorcerer among no others than one from hundreds and despite your hatred of the things he did, you must know what this person did was wrong”

Morgana: “find them and bring them to justice, not for practicing sorcery but for committing murder”

Arthur: “of course”

Morgana is all for Arthur being the king bcs she knows after everything with Morgause and Cenred, the people would never accept her as queen but at least this way, her people stood a chance

Aithusa

Arthur doesn’t plan on destroying the egg but doesn’t really care what happens to it so long as Broden is captured

Morgana goes with the knights as magic is her lineage too and they will keep her secret

Merlin tells them of the Druids warnings about the trap bcs knight squad knows the magic squad secret (that they’re ✨magic✨)

He and Morgana witness the birth of Aithusa who immediately takes a liking to Morgana

His Father’s Son

Ealdgyð allies herself with Annis after Caerleon’s death

Morgana hints at Arthur to get Gwen flowers

At this point Morgana is just as strong as Merlin as they train together

A Servant of Two Masters

Ealdgyð takes Merlin

Thinks Dragoon is Emrys

The Secret Sharer

Ealdgyð: “I do this, not out of spite, but to ensure my daughter does not have to live her life as I did, afraid and in hiding”

Lamia

Morgana searches with Arthur and Agravaine

Lancelot du Lac

Ealdgyð will not have some common non-magic child take her throne and title (believes it is rightfully hers as magic is superior and she is the chosen heir of a high priestess (Morgause))

Merlin uses magic freely in front of those who know

Frees Lancelot’s soul but cannot stop Gwen’s banishing bcs Agravaine

A Herald of the New Age

Merlin tells Arthur about the Druid boy and Elyan’s situation but they need to figure something out bcs knowing intimate knowledge of magic wouldn’t help their case

The Hunter’s Heart

Arthur: “Well what am I supposed to do, Merlin? Tell the whole court we’ve been committing high treason for years - they would think us in league with the other sorcerer and take our heads”

Gwen avoids the sorceress smartly bcs she has brain cells

Morgana: “Do you think I’m happy about all this? I’ve been planning their wedding for years - who wouldn’t want their closest friend to become their sister?”

~ while on the hunt ~

Morgana: Wait a minute, you like Mithian-”

Merlin: “what no-”

Morgana: “you’re doing the thing”

Merlin: “what thing? I don’t do a thing.”

Morgana: “yes you do, It’s that thing you do when you think Gwaine isn’t looking”

Merlin: “shut up-”

Morgana: “oh this is gonna be fun”

Arthur calls off the hunt when Merlin tells him the deer is really Gwen but he and Mithian can’t be gone long so he and Morgana help after dark, Merlin being a physician and helping her wounds and Morgana turning her human again

She spills the beans and reveals the sorceress’ name as Ealdgyð and that Agravaine is definitely in league but they had to proof and couldn’t just accuse the king’s uncle especially given that they’re only a servant and an exile

The Sword in the Stone 1

Ealdgyð and Helios attack Camelot on Beltaine

Morgana is captured

Ealdgyð (to Morgana): “You betrayed our people”

The Sword in the Stone 2

Morgana is made to starve “like so many of our own have bcs of your precious family”

Ealdgyð: “You, Arthur Pendragon, are in fact worse than your father. You pretend to be a man of peace while upholding an unlawful law that has killed countless women and children”

Aithusa stays with Morgana but Ealdgyð is saved by random folks who think her simply a lost, hurt woman

3 YEARS PASS

Season 5

AGES:

MERLIN: 26-27

ARTHUR: 28-29

MORGANA: 31-32

GWEN: 26-27 (A FEW MONTHS YOUNGER THAN MERLIN)

MORDRED: ~19-20

Arthur’s Bane 1

Mordred is on Ealdgyð’s side bcs she’s Kara’s mother (eventually realises she’s wrong bcs what kind of mother drags her child into war)

Morgana and Aithusa stay with Gwen to help protect the castle bcs “the knights already have a sorcerer - if something happens here, Gods forbid it, you will need someone”

Merlin tells Arthur of the seer’s vision to which he reminds the young warlock that Morgana was supposed to also be their fate and yet she was saved and so will the boy be

The group is captured by Ealdgyð and here we meet Mordred

Arthur’s Bane 2

Mordred tries to get food to Merlin and Arthur but cannot ‘sorry, Emrys’

‘I said I would not forget what you did for me and I meant it’ and so Mordred tells him about the Diamair

They fight the Saxons with Mordred secretly helping them escape

Merlin: ‘thank you Mordred’

Mordred: ‘just returning the favour’

Merlin is attacked by a druid Saxon who he knocks out

~ confrontation time ~

Arthur: “We want to help you, Ealdgyð, but when you attack and enslave our people, it doesn’t exactly give us much confidence in you.”

Ealdgyð: “Liar! You force Morgana to hide away and to forget who she truly is-”

Arthur: “Actually she’s at the castle protecting everyone bcs we know that magic isn’t evil but your hatred, Ealdgyð, has made you evil.”

Ealdgyð: “If you are so good and kind, why do you not lift the ban on our people?”

Arthur: “Finding one sorcerer, you, amongst few is much easier than finding you amongst countless others. We have not persecuted any magic users since my coronation - the law is just there in name and once you are gone, it will be removed once and for all.”

Ealdgyð: “So you think killing me will make our people love you?”

Arthur: “I don’t want their love, only their forgiveness but you killed the king and that is high treason, regardless of magic.”

Mordred stabs Ealdgyð when he hears their conversation bcs o hey she’s nuts and yk he’s not evil :)

~ later ~

Merlin: “Actually, Arthur, Gwen and some of the knights know I have magic.”

Mordred: “When did he know?”

Merlin: “A couple of months after you and I first met. It’s actually quite a funny story-”

Arthur: “Merlin, shut up-”

Merlin: ‘I’ll tell you later.’

Mordred calls Merlin Emrys around Morgana and she’s like eh?? and he’s like yeah, druids call him Emrys and she remembers the prophecy but keeps her mouth shut bcs ‘wtf? My destiny?? lol no’

The Death Song of Uther Pendragon

Morgana does not join the pair even tho she was his ward bcs Uther was Uther ew

~ before blowing the horn ~

Arthur: “If something goes wrong, you can help, right?”

Merlin: “Maybe. But magic involving the dead isn’t something I typically deal with.”

~ during the crazy shite ~

Arthur: “Are you certain?”

Merlin: “What else could’ve escaped the horn but the person summoned by it?”

Arthur: “I refuse to believe that my father’s ghost somehow attacked a knight”

‘Poetry’ is still a thing bcs Arthur didn’t want to tarnish his father’s respect name but wtv

He spills the beans to his dad that he knows of Merlin’s magic and that if it wasn’t for him and Morgana, everyone would probably be dead so fuck off :D

Another’s Sorrow

Ealdgyð disguises herself as Hilda

Mithian and Merlin and Morgana flirt bcs they’re bi nightmares, or yk, bi-ghtmares

Plus more flirting between Merlin and Gwaine ft. panicked bi!Merlin

Morgana goes with Mithian and Arthur upon Merlin’s injury and fights Ealdgyð

Morgana: “3 of us and one of her, I like our chances”

Merlin: “But she’s growing stronger fast”

Mordred: “and so long as we keep studying and training, we’ll still be stronger”

Merlin teaches Mordred and Morgana physician stuff bcs bonding

The Disir

~ training montage ~

Arthur: “Next time try combining your sword skills with your magic”

Mordred: “but that’s not a fair fight-”

Arthur: “you’re a druid. Magic is the first tool you were born with and it’s our birthright to use it. Plus in a war, magic will help us”

Merlin still worries whether he’s too young to be out fighting with the rest of em

Arthur: “he’s a sorcerer - he has an inbuilt defence system regardless of whether he has his sword. He’ll be fine - and honestly, Merlin, you’re not his wetnurse or his mother.”

Merlin: “prat-”

Arthur: “what was that?”

Merlin: “I called you a prat, my lord”

Arthur: “I will not bow to the Triple Goddess for I do not follow her. But please, my friend is a sorcerer, a druid and a follower of the Old Religion. He is innocent. Spare him, please.”

Mordred is spared bcs they were impressed Arthur would risk their wrath but bcs he didn’t bow to them, his fate is still sealed

The Dark Tower

Ealdgyð kidnaps Gwen

Merlin, Mordred and Morgana do cooperative magic to try and find Gwen but to no avail

So they all go to the Dark Tower together f is for friends who do stuff together, u is you and me-

They use magic and swords to hack at the overgrowth but again, to no avail

He tells them all of Queen Mab and leads the way

Morgana saves the falling Merlin from impaling himself on the sword

~ psychological torture time ~

Ealdgyð: “My sweet child, you know Camelot is doomed if Arthur and Morgana are to rule. Arthur longs for the old ways and the security of his father while Morgana wants a magical revolution. They will tear the city apart in their wars and countless will die.”

Gwen: No, no, that’s wrong- you’re lying-”

Ealdgyð: “And yet you know I am right bcs if Arthur was not still waging his war against magic, I would be safely with my daughter but instead she is made parentless by the Pendragons and if Arthur is to continue having his way, my daughter will be made an orphan.”

Succumbs to Ealdgyð

Elyan still died unfortunately

A Lesson in Vengeance

Merlin uses magic subtly to save Arthur so Gwen doesn’t notice

The knights arrest Merlin for sorcery even tho they know he wouldn’t do it bcs who else could have

He still doesn’t tell Arthur about Gwen’s brainwashing bcs to accuse the Queen is a serious accusation

The Hollow Queen

Gaius tells Arthur the truth about Merlin going to save the young girl in the Valley of The Fallen Kings instead of the usual tavern business

(flashback) Sarrum took Kara hostage and forced Ealdgyð to comply for her sake and they were kept separately for the two years, only getting to see each other for mere moments

Merlin reveals to Daegal that Arthur knows of his magic and one day, magic will be commonplace in Camelot once more

Morgana agrees with Arthur that Merlin hasn’t got a girlfriend but Gwen teases her and asks if she’s jealous

Morgana: “of course not- in fact, I’m happy for him” but yk she’s lowkey jelly

With All My Heart

The Triple Goddess responds best to women so he (disguised as the Dolma (who is a pretty young lady might I add), not that it mattered bcs he’s is a he/she/they enby and I stand by that) and Morgana summoned the Triple Goddess (thank fuck that Morgana is Her High Priestess)

Morgana, Merlin, Mordred (having saved them mid-journey and then joined them), Aithusa and Arthur take Gwen to the Cauldron of Arianrhod

Mordred stays behind to try and cover their tracks, physically and magically, but is caught by Kara

Kara: “why do you stand behind someone who kills our people?”

Mordred: “Arthur has never killed any of us-”

Kara: “he stands by the law that put me and my mother through two years of hell! He is evil and if you cannot see that, you are not the Mordred I once knew and loved.”

Mordred: “Kara, please-”

Kara: “no-”

Mordred: “Kara, he knows! He knows about my gifts and he has not once even scorned for using them. The ban on magic is only up because we need to stop Ealdgyð from killing everyone-”

Kara: “why do you immediately forsake my mother? She is the only reason I am still alive, no thanks to you. The Pendragons are the reasons why we have been running for our lives our entire lives. And they are the reason why countless more children will never reach their truest potential and will never know who they truly are. Yet you still blame my mother who has done nothing but protect our people-!”

Mordred: “Your mother was going to kill everyone in Camelot just to spite Morgana! I still believe in the cause, Kara, but I do not believe in her and her ways!”

Kara: “We are druids and magic is our birthright!”

Mordred: “And druids are a peaceful people but Ealdgyð? She perverted our ways and has used the darkest magics, hurt countless people and all bcs she wants the throne. I will not join her so please, for the love of the Gods, don’t make me fight you Kara.”

Kara: “Tell us, tell me, who Emrys is and we won’t have to.”

Mordred: “Never.” *knocks her out w/ magic* “Forgive me, my love.”

The Kindness of Strangers

Ealdgyð thinks Alator a traitor for supporting the mighty Emrys who refuses to help their people in their time of need and so the torture begins

Merlin still doesn’t tell Arthur about the Alator-and-Finna-of-the-Catha situation bcs he’s busy yk and so tells Morgana and Mordred bcs it’s magic stuff so it’s their business too

He and Morgana go to find Finna

Merlin still attacked but Morgana stays with Finna and fights Ealdgyð and Finna is saved and on their side (bcs she is a Bendrui and they stand by Emrys, always)

The Drawing of the Dark

Mordred tells them it was Kara not some deer but still let her go

~ Later ~

Merlin: “why didn’t you stop her?”

Mordred: “how could I have?”

Morgana: “your magic is strong”

Mordred: “if you caught the love of your life after she killed someone, would you want to turn her in?”

Merlin: “you said it yourself, she killed someone”

Mordred: “she’s never wanted to hurt anyone. She only does this for her mother”

Morgana: “do you think she’d hurt her if she disobeyed?”

Mordred: “think about it this way: she practically raised me, called me her son in every way but blood and yet she now wants my head on a pike almost as much as she wants yours”

Arthur and Mordred patrol together (bcs they’re knights) w/ Merlin (bcs he’s Arthur’s) and find Kara and Mordred is shooketh at how bloodthirsty Kara has become

She is much confused when Merlin deflect the knife magically and he uses magic to bind her in front of them and no one bats an eye bcs she fr thought Mordred was bullshitting about Arthur being chill with it

She tries to kill Arthur again and does not take the chances he kept giving her for Mordred’s sake

Kara: “why do you continue trying to help me? You, who puts our kind through hell everyday.”

Arthur: “I want to make things better for all our peoples including you and yours but that cannot happen while your mother continues to attack, plague and kill our people, innocent people.”

Kara: “you’re lying - my mother would never hurt innocents”

Mordred: “we can show you”

Kara: “how?”

Mordred: “we were at the battle - you know the memory retrieval spell?”

Kara: “of course”

*le spell*

Kara: “that can’t be right- this must be some trick-”

Mordred: “Kara, look at me, look at me. You know me and you know I would never trick you like this. We did the spell together, out loud, and you can hear my thoughts so listen now. I did not trick you and we are not lying to you”

Kara: *crumples* “then the people I’ve hurt, the people I’ve killed-”

Arthur: “you were simply following orders, trying to make your parent proud; I know what that’s like. You are not to blame and you can save so many others if you only help us. Please.”

Kara: “to hear a king say please is a strange thing indeed.”

She comes back to the light

Magic squad is weirdly big considering the laws at this point but Camelot needs all the help they can get

Ealdgyð realises Merlin has magic bcs of the miraculous things that happen around Arthur and yk it’s too much to be just some coincidence plus she was keeping an eye on her daughter and saw Merlin deflect the knife and he is what keeps the magic squad together and she can only use the Gean Canach very few times bcs ‘tis rare

The Diamond of the Day 1

Merlin tells the knight squad and magic squad about his loss of powers and that he’s gonna go get them back somehow

Kara snitches that Eira is a spy for Ealdgyð and she gets dungeon time

Merlin, Gwaine and Finna go to the Valley of the Fallen Kings while Mordred, Kara and Morgana stay behind and protect Queen and kingdom

Ealdgyð knows Merlin will go the Crystal Cave to regain his powers

Gwaine stands guard at the cave mouth while Finna and Merlin go in but Finna has to stop and stay with Gwaine after a moment

Merlin: “this is a journey I must make on my own”

Gwaine: “could’ve told us that before we came out into the woods with you”

Merlin: “you’d have come with me anyways”

Gwaine: “yeah, you’re probably right”

Ealdgyð leaves after Gwaine sleeps with invisibility and silencing spells on to mask herself from Finna (who’s on watch at that point)

The Diamond of the Day 2

Merlin comes along looking like himself instead of Dragoon bcs there was no time to waste on disguises

The magic squad are beating Ealdgyð bcs yk there’s: Emrys, the High Priestess of the Triple Goddess, a Bendrui priestess and two highly skilled druids against Saesons

Merlin beats Ealdgyð and before she dies, Kara and Mordred get to say goodbye

Ealdgyð: “I’m sorry it came to this- all I ever wanted was a better life for you both and instead I dragged you into a war”

Kara: “we understand and we’re sorry too - we should’ve at least tried peace”

Ealdgyð: “that’s my fault”

Mordred: “and it’s our too. We could have insisted on it but we just blindly followed instead of talking to you”

Ealdgyð: “I’m so sorry my boy”

Kara: “rest easy, mother. Magic is returning to Camelot and we will be free once more”

Mordred: “goodbye Ealdgyð”

Post Battle-of-Camlann

Arthur (29) repeals the ban on magic

Kara (22) is formally pardoned bcs of her role in the Battle of Camlann bcs she saved Arthur’s life

Merlin (27) is Court Physician first and Court Sorcerer secondly after Gaius retires bcs mans is old af and Finna is Court Sorceress (and she still studies under him)

Alice returns and she and Gaius finally marry

1 year post Battle of Camlann

Arthur (30) and Gwen (28) have a daughter, Avlyn Pendragon, 1 year post-Battle-of-Camlann

Takes a year for Morgana (33) and Merlin (28) to finally get together and start courting

2 years post Battle of Camlann

Kara (23) and Mordred (22) marry

4 years post Battle of Camlann

Arthur (33) and Gwen (31) have a son, Cadwr Pendragon, 4 years post-Battle-of-Camlann (Avlyn (3))

Gwaine (33) and Percival (31) marry and we’re gonna pretend homophobia ain’t a thing bcs this is a comfort fic not a whump fic

Leon (37) starts courting Mithian (31) (idk y but they fit really well for some reason imo) and married after 6 months

5 years post Battle of Camlann

Merlin (32) and Morgana (37) marry and Hunith is very happy for them

Merlin (32) and Morgana (37) have twins, Morfydd and Ywaine

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thetradeway · 3 years

Text

Session 49 21 Aug 2021 - Faceless Jim

Duncan is at Matthew and Sophie’s house, so we’re just waiting for Ed (who is with us this week! He is back from the festival with a lurgy, which may or may not be covid. “Several people I was… Well, I was in a car with, have got it.” Duncan: “You can say ‘cuddle puddle’, it’s okay.” He did see Devin Townsend though.) and Mina.

Matthew: “Terrible things happened last week!”

Sophie, remembering: “*Gasp* Oh yeah! Not to anyone important though.”

Ardvack has no face, which was stolen by this creature:

Joe has edited Ardvack’s token accordingly:

We’re in the Underdark, as a reminder. Does Ardvack want Kessler to fashion him a face out of something? Ahleqs pats him on the shoulder and reassures him that we’ll fix him when we get back to the surface. Kessler wants to, in her spare time, work on a way of making Ardvack a face. He bandages himself for now, and casts Disguise Self so he looks like he still has his face. Matthew is able to edit the token and switch between his faces.

“Don’t investigate me too much.”

Tarragon Investigates for mushrooms, and finds two types that could be useful in herbal recipes, so she makes some cuttings and stores them away. One is green and seems poisonous; she could use it for her contact poison. (It’s like the ones you get in Fallout 4.) The second is blue and called a Nightlight mushroom; if you burn it, it releases a relaxing smoke; she could use it in her Relaxing Bark recipe.

Gideon’s ring says that the drift globe is trying to lead us east.

We decide to take a long rest; during it, Ardvack gives Gideon the stone of Shar that we found.

Tarragon makes Kessler some contact poison for her crossbow bolts. She can add a d6 poison damage on ten crossbow bolts - but the poison loses potency once it’s exposed to air, and is ineffective after 1 hour.

Kessler manages to make a slightly creepy leather face for when Ardvack’s illusion drops. “But I haven’t got a chainsaw. I’ll have to make do with a wood saw.” She will make him a better one when we get back to town. He takes it with two fingers and inspects it. He looks her dead in the face and says thank you, and tries to surreptitiously put it in a pocket.

We move on.

We make Perception checks; Tarragon rubs mushroom spores in her eye (nat 1). Gideon notices bones on the floor around us. They’re from creatures rather than humanoids; he makes an Investigation check on them but he’s not sure what exactly. He thinks maybe something medium-sized, possibly canine.

Have the bones been gnawed on, Ahleqs wants to know? He makes an Investigation check as well, but he can’t see any chew-marks.

Have any been cut cleanly? Kessler, Tarragon and Melaina see that some look half sheared, half smashed; it doesn’t look like a weapon was involved. Whatever did this ripped its victims apart; they are of various ages but some are pretty new, and they are clean of meat.

Uh oh.

The scenery starts to change. The large mushrooms begin to thin out, and the place grows more cavernous. The ceilings get lower, and there are stalactites and stalagmites. Kessler, Melaina, Gideon and Tarragon hear clicks and little scraping noises from multiple directions.

Gideon, with rising horror: “Some hideous creature dripping with ichor!”

We listen for more sounds as we move, and they seem to be getting more frequent. Gideon thinks we should check to make sure we’re going the right way, and uses the ring to illuminate the drift globe again. It rushes ahead of us and down into an area of huge stalactites and stalagmites; he extinguishes the globe.

Ardvack: “When I die down here… First off I’m sorry, for literally everything. But I was wondering if I could entrust to you… Carl. It was always my aim to find a cleric who could cast True Resurrection on him, so he could go back to his own family. I want you to promise me you will do your best to find someone who can bring Carl back to life so he can live a full life.”

Kessler wants to know if Ardvack can promise us that Carl wasn’t a murderer. He was bitten by a snake, Ardvack says. He was a woodsman. He didn’t look like a murderer.

Ahleqs points out that if Ardvack dies, we’re not getting out of here either.

Gideon spots some skeletons up ahead. “I fear I’ve made a grave mistake…"

Sophie, OOC: “Pun intended.”

Gideon makes a Perception check - a 12. At the end of the cavern in the direction the globe was pointing, is a large creature with a vulture like head with a carapace and razor sharp claws.

Gideon, eyeing the hook horror: “How important is this wizard, exactly?”

Ardvack realises that without the wizard, we can’t get out. We were teleported down here… Oh, it turns out that once we get back within the wards (where we teleported in) they will know we’re there and teleport us back.

What are we looking at? It’s a skeksis, isn’t it?

It’s a skeksis.

Ahleqs: “… Maybe it wants to talk?”

Joe: “Tarragon and Melaina, would you like to look behind you?”

We turn. There are two more behind us.

Initiative time…

Faceless Jim is up first.

(Duncan thinks Joe is sick of this campaign and is just throwing monsters at us to see how long we’ll survive. Joe: “I asked you if you wanted to go to the Underdark, Duncan, and you said yes so I have no sympathy with you.”)

Faceless Jim’s computer takes a shit, so he has Joe cast Eldritch Blast for him. Both hit for ten total damage. The creature ahead of us emits a hideous screech.

Then one of the things gets a go… It’s the fourth one, that we didn’t know was there. Oh good!

Gideon, who hasn’t turned around yet: “Oh, there’s two!”

It towers over Ardvack and foul smelling drool drips onto him.

Ed: “Does it purr and roll onto its back?”

It does not do that.

One of the attacks is a nat 1, but the other hits and it starts to peck some of Ardvack’s scalp off.

Tarragon hears a thumping noise behind her as one of the others attacks her, but both miss.

Before Ahleqs’ turn, a fifth one appears.

Me: “He is! He’s trying to kill us!”

The newcomer thinks the Grease Wizard looks delicious. It misses as well, fortunately.

Ahleqs casts Shatter. “Why are there so many?”

Joe: “Because they hunt in packs.”

“… Clever girl.”

Joe will let Ahleqs soil himself as a free action if he wants. His muscles are too clenched, unfortunately. Next round, perhaps.

One attacks Melaina and hits, and then it’s her turn. She Bonus-Action-Disengages and retreats into a corner to attack the one in melee with Tarragon. 16 hits. 37 damage! It screams and wobbles.

Ahleqs: “… And dies?”

No, but it looks rough.

Kessler uses one of her new poisoned crossbow bolts - a hit and a natty 20. Noice. Including the poison, 45 damage. Noice! It wavers on its feet and throws up a foul substance right next to Gideon.

Gideon: “Augh! Why!”

Tarragon Thunderwaves the two closest to her. The injured one is pushed away.

Joe: “That one’s having his worst ever day.”

Tarragon, brightly: “Good! I’m glad to have been a part of it.”

Carl is up, but Matthew has to go and collect pizza from the door. Once he returns, Carl dashes recklessly up to one and does a Slam attack. It hits, and the thing is looking tatty; Carl decides fuck it and goes for a bonus action grapple attack; but the thing is bigger than him, and may escape automatically. He gives it a go anyway. He does grapple it, but it has advantage to escape on its turn.

Is the river water, or methane, or what? It’s water? Okay, dwarven combat roll! Gideon lines himself up to get two of them in his sights, and uses the ruler to prove he can hit them both. Both fail the save for Aganazzar’s Scorcher!

“I do 28 roasting damage to these chickens!”

He gets a how-de-do-dis on the one Carl’s grappling - its feathers catch fire and it crumbles into ash. Carl gives Gideon a gauntleted thumbs up.

Ed, absolutely delighted: “Wait wait wait, I got my one liner cause they’re birds!

“I knew this would be a poultry affair!”

Gideon takes a badass sip from his magical ale jug. He is very pleased with himself and puts his hands on his hips.

(Welcome back, Ed.)

Another ninja one appears.

Ardvack, resigned: “Yep.” He drops his Disguise Self spell, and is attacked and pecked by one of the hook horrors.

Joe, entirely too pleased with himself: “What you doing, Ardvack? Apart from being digested.”

He Misty Steps the fuck outta there, and turns for an Eldritch Blast. It emits some high pitched clicks and the others respond; Kessler takes an Attack of Opportunity as it tries to retreat, but misses. It dashes to the back of the cave and is gone.

The two near Tarragon both attack her. Tarragon: “Bring it.” They do, and both hit. Tarragon, surprised but not especially inconvenienced: “Oh. Ouchie.”

Ahleqs does Eldritch Blast on one of them. How-de-do-dis! Yay! “I turn it into chum!”

Now a semi-professional coward, and aware that these things will have to kill a good number of his friends before they get to him, Ahleqs stays where he is.

Melaina hides and does Sharpshooter; 11 just misses.

Kessler steps up to one and punches it in the jaw. She goes for an Animal Handling check to try and tame one, but rolls badly.

Tarragon Rages and goes for an attack with her quarterstaff and rolls a nat 1. Butterfingers: You lose your grip mid-swing and your weapon goes flying (15 feet) away in the direction of your target. She looks over her shoulder to see who noticed; at least Ahleqs and Melaina, possibly Ardvack as well.

“… Well, shit.”

Carl goes for a Slam attack but misses. Gideon goes for an Acid Splash.

Joe: “Not until you do the voice!”

Ed, in Gideon old-man voice, as requested: “Acid Splash!” He moves, and turns his token around - and is genuinely alarmed to see Ardvack, faceless, standing behind him.

One gets a Nat 20 on Carl - he is Frightened of them for five rounds (Joe rolls on the crit table), and he takes 32 damage from just the crit, and then 6 more on top.

Another goes for Kessler but she reaction-Shields.

Faceless Jim again, and after some deliberation he looks in his mirror, re-assesses his face, pockets the mirror again, and does an Eldritch Blast on the one that attacked Carl. He rolls a one and a two on two d10. He basically pets it a bit too hard, like a kid with a cat. Ardvack bonus-action Healing Potions.

The one behind Tarragon hits her twice again. She’s raging so it’s halved to 12.

Ahleqs casts Shatter on that one, at level 3. “BLAAAAAM! Get Shattered, son!” (The somatic component for that spell is gang signs, it turns out.) It hits, and bits and chunks fly off. He has to roll a d20 (he’s been forgetting to do that) and rolls a nat 1, so he has to roll on the chaos table. He casts Levitate on himself.

Melaina rinses and repeats. 16 to hit for 32 damage! It looks rough!

Kessler once more tries to tame the one in front of her, beginning by punching it. The punch connects, but the taming attempt does not. She punches it again.

Tarragon goes bear and rips one apart, going to town on the innards. She lumbers toward the remaining two hook horrors, in melee with Carl and Kessler.

Carl is Frightened so he runs away, and the hook horror closest gets an Attack of Opportunity. 14 hits for 12 Piercing, but he has enough Hit Points to survive it. He runs to hide behind Ardvack, his gauntleted hands on Ardvack’s shoulders. (Bearing in mind that he is both broader and considerably taller than Ardvack.)

Gideon goes for a brilliant Dwarven tactic - the flank! Or - wait, no. He could always summon Rusty…?

We wait, while Ed has ideas. He could do flumph delivery on his spell! Wait, he can scurry - "such as only a dwarf can perform" - so he can properly place his cube, and Thunderwaves two hook horrors. Both succeed the save - and the bones nearby are scattered by the spell to reveal something shiny.

One is very injured and tries to run - Attack of Opportunity from Kessler and Gideon. Kessler’s hits, but Gideon swings with his magical tankard and misses with a nat 1. He rolls on the crit fail table - Sidestepped. Swap places with the target and make a DC 14 Dex save - on fail, you fall prone. The target has gone, and Gideon makes the save. Phew.

Ardvack doubles down and tries again. Eldritch Blast, one hit and one miss. 8 Force damage. He bonus action potions again.

Floating shop boy can’t do much so he stops concentrating on Levitate (even though it was involuntarily cast) and does Eldritch Blast as well. another hit and another miss. Ardvack, with his skinless face: “Attaboy!”

Melaina steps behind some stalagmites and hides with a nat 20, becoming basically invisible. She then misses with her attack. “Bollocks.”

Kessler turns her attention to the last remaining hook horror and warns it that it can end up like its mates, or it can be her steed. It makes some panicky clicks, but none are returned from the gloom. Kessler rolls her third 7 on Animal Handling.

Ardvack, calling from further away: “Just buy a horse!”

Kessler hits it for 7 Thunder damage and winds up the second shot which is a nat 20. Stunning blow: Max damage, and the target must make a DC14 CON save. On fail the target is stunned. It makes the save.

Bear Tarragon goes full Revenant, picks up the hook horror and shakes it until bits fall off. “And then I eat the bits.”

That was the last of them; Gideon goes immediately for the shiny thing he saw. “Gimme. Gimme gimme gimme.”

It’s a wooden ring carved with mice. He wants to cast Identify; have we got ten minutes? Sure!

It’s a Ring of Warmth. While wearing this ring, you have resistance to cold damage. In addition, you and everything you wear and carry are unharmed by temperatures as low as −50 degrees Fahrenheit.

Ed, suddenly realising something: “We’re ticking too many boxes - finding rings in caves, oh no!!!!”

We take a short recess for hit dice and tea.

Ardvack does not cast Disguise Self again. We all make Insight checks, even Bear-Tarragon. Anyone above a ten knows we have ticked over to the next day. We are now on the 2nd of Eleasis, in the year 1492. Ardvack reanimates some of the bones and calls the resulting minion Beverly. He is a boy.

Sophie, pinging something on the map: “Joe is this a mushroom? It’s all veiny and weird and I don’t like it.”

Melaina roots around for stuff, and unearths a leather roll of papers, quills, seals, sealing wax and so on. Joe: “I like to think that some poor diplomat has been ripped apart down here.”

Gideon reactivates the drift globe, and we follow. We continue through the caverns, in a general downward direction.

“You can travel at a slower pace and sneak…?”

Gideon, immediately: “No!”

Tarragon can be a bear for up to two hours; she remains so for as long as she can, but reverts back after a while.

We start to hear water. Ahleqs casts Mage Armour.

We are led to a bottleneck, and then a giant cave full of bioluminescent plants - ferns, and flowers, rather than mushrooms. Even the water glows a strange blue. We see a stone bridge crossing a subterranean river which crashes down from a waterfall. On either side of the bridge are two pillars made of skulls.

Ardvack, crossly: “Well this is going to go swimmingly, I assume.” He tells Beverly to cross the bridge - the eyes light up in all the skulls. Necrotic energy bursts from them, right at Beverly.

Gideon, waving: “Bye, Beverly.”

How many HP does Beverly have? And what’s his Dexterity? Not enough. Beverly is dust.

Ardvack turns to us with his skinless face. “You’re welcome.”

Hmm. Who’s next?

Could we wade? The water is glowing, so that’s probably not good. It doesn’t look too deep. Ahleqs wants to know if it’s magic. He makes an Arcana check - a 7. He has no idea. Ardvack takes the Help action.

Joe: “Look at Ardvack, making friends. Someone should have ripped your face off years ago son.”

Ardvack: “… I spit at God.”

The water is likely just glowing from minerals or something. Ahleqs does Eldritch Blast at the pillars; no damage. Melaina and Kessler look at the bridge: they remember when Beverly set foot on the bridge, the pillars adjusted to aim at him. They see burn marks across the bridge where other creatures have been struck before.

If one of us can get across maybe there’s an off switch? Melaina calculates how far she can jump, and aims for a boulder in the middle of the river. The sockets of the skull stay dark and the pillars do not move.

Could we use a mirror to reflect the beams back? Ardvack thinks it won’t work; there will be a mirror and an evaporated person.

Melaina estimates a four foot depth in the water. She can’t jump because she has no space for a run up on the boulder, so she steps in and wades square by square. “Does anything happen?” The skulls stay dark and the pillars don’t move.

Tarragon asks Carl if she can climb up on his shoulders as she would be swept away in four feet of water; he gives her a thumbs up and crouches down. Kessler doesn’t yet have a jet pack, so what will she do?

Carl ventures across, ignoring the boulder and wading right from the start. He lumbers slowly; he’s not a raging cadaver right now. He sets her down gently on the other side.

Matthew OOC: “So I assume Ardvack is eaten by the river monster…?”

As we pass through, we see that the water is perfectly clear. We can fill our water skins if we want. We do.

Gideon and Kessler are still on the other side. Gideon wants to swim. Kessler wants to jump at least halfway, and swim the rest.

Close up we can see that the skulls are carved from stone. Gideon uses his stone cunning to tell us that it looks like Duergar work.

“Oh dear. The Grumpy Dwarves, we call them.”

Ardvack is going to evaporate someone when we get back. He moves three squares and is told “Stop right there!” by the DM.

Here is what happens: There is a 40 foot-ish high ceiling here, with stalactites. We pass through two columns, and something makes an attack: a tendril reaches down from the ceiling and grapples Ardvack. Does 24 hit Melaina? Yes? She is also grappled then. As is Carl, and Gideon.

It then reels Ardvack in - he is raised 25 feet in the air.

It’s a roper!

Ed, OOC: “He’s ‘orrible! Get rid of him!”

We roll initiative…

Ahleqs goes first. After his customary scream, he casts Shatter. “That’s a good spell! BLAM!” He throws his gang signs. It makes the save and takes five damage.

Kessler hits with her poisoned crossbow bolts. Carl makes an attempt to break free from the roper’s grapple, but fails. He makes a breathy, dusty, dry sound.

Gideon wants to cast something, and can do so while grappled, so he goes Fireball. “How dextrous can it be? It’s literally nailed in place!”

Joe: “You say that; it rolled an 18.”

Gideon: “You bitch!”

He hears other screams up there. “Oh no, I think it might have fried our wizard!” He looks at the drift globe; it wants us to continue on through this cavern. He hasn’t cooked our quarry. Phew. For some reason, we never follow up on the screams.

Tarragon runs up to Melaina to hit the tendril grappling her, but misses. Two more tendrils try to grapple her, but miss.

The tendril holding Ardvack lifts him higher, and the roper bites him for 19 piercing damage. Matthew, OOC: “I imagine you all see something pierce me and come out the back.”

Melaina tries to break free. “Bazinga. Twelve! A mighty twelve.” The roper rolls a nine, so she’s free! She moves away and hides - but just before she rolls to hide, she is told to hold that thought.

“I don’t like the sound of that.”

Joe: “Does 18 hit you?”

“*sigh* yes.” She takes four piercing damage, as a maggot type creature hangs from the ceiling onto her head, and gives it a good monch.

She’s at Disadvantage now, with her lovely slug hat.

Ardvack goes for a Shocking Grasp, but rolls a nat 1. (He is having yet another terrible day.) Crit fail magic macro: Not quite what I meant. The target of your spell becomes resistant to the damage type of the spell for 1 round.

Ahleqs makes a Perception check; “Ohhhhh, God.” 15 - high on the ceiling above him he can hear shuffling sounds. He calls up: “No, thank you.” He casts Fireball. The roper fails and takes 30 points of damage. “And is killed. And is killed…?”

In the flash of the fireball, we see that some of the stalactites are quivering and shaking.

He rolls his d20, but is fine.

Carl is still grappled. He wants to grab hold of the tendril and pull back, digging his heels in and trying to pull it off the ceiling. He rolls high, but the roper rolls higher with a nat 20. Dammit.

Kessler shoots with her crossbow. A hit and a miss.

Another Piercer drops down and narrowly misses Ahleqs. He gives it a kick. Gideon is up. “Well then.” He does Aganazzar’s Scorcher again and hits. “I burn ye!”

Tarragon runs forward an smashes Ahleqs’ piercer with her quarterstaff, showering Ahleqs with goo. He uses Tides of Chaos on his Dex check and his hair falls out again. Tarragon heals Ardvack with Healing Word at third level, for which he is not grateful. A piercer falls on Tarragon and hits her for 4 damage, and then a tendril reaches down and grapples her.

Another tendril reaches down and misses Kessler. A third grabs for Ahleqs and gets him. Ardvack is bitten by the roper; he throws up his breakfast in its mouth. It reels Tarragon in.

“I hope I give you the shits!”

Ahleqs is hit by another piercer. “It hits me square in my self.”

Melaina shoots for the roper. “Bollocks. Eleven.” She bonus action hides again “So that my worm friend doesn’t see me.”

Ardvack casts Shillshsldgksdkghsdglhjjhh and bonus action Flaming Blades it. “That much [damage].” Eighteen total, jabbing around in its gullet.

The stone part of the roper is cracking, and weeping some sort of ooze between the cracks.

A maggot drops past Kessler and splats on the floor. “I laugh.”

Ardvack: “Quick! Kessler, Animal Handling check! Make it a mount!”

Ahleqs: “Fuck it, I’m gonna do another Fireball.” The roper fails the save and takes 34 fire damage. “Oooh, hello!”

It is pretty heinously wounded now, and it uses its reaction to drop everyone who’s grappled. Ardvack and Tarragon are going to take some falling damage. Carl refuses to let go of it; he fully intends to pull the roper off the ceiling or pull the tendril off the roper.

Carl makes a STR check - an 11. “Awwww.”

Kessler shoots with her crossbow again - 17 misses, both times.

Gideon does Aganazzar’s Scorcher again, and the roper fails the save. How-de-do-dis!

“I scorch it like Doctor Octopus’ laser beam and it drops down but doesn’t hit anyone - conveniently - and it plops down on the ground.”

We squish the remaining Piercers, as they can’t do much once they’ve dropped. Carl uses one to kill another one.

We’ve solved Joe’s roper puzzle, but there’s still no sign of Ava, or of the wizard.

We take a short rest, before we halt there for this week.

#dnd #thetradeway #campaign diary

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hotcaramelmachiatto · 5 years

Text

Luffy x Reader

Imagine: Being Luffy's friend when you were children with Sabo and Ace and running into (quite literally) him at Loguetown. He asks you to join his crew!

Pairing: Luffy x fem! close friend! witch! Reader

Warning: fluffy

H/c=hair color | s/c=skin color | y/n/n= your nickname

You sighed, pulling your cloak over shoulders and tucking your wand into your belt. Being the extremely clever witch you were, you had just swindled your way into halfing the price of your ingredients for your next potion. You desperately needed them and if swindling meant using a sleeping spell on the shop owner, then so be it. Your dream was to become the worlds greatest and most powerful witch. As a child, your parents died and you were raised by a small coven of witches who taught you everything you knew.

You smiled softly at the memory of your adopted family until you heard the shop keeper shout at you from the small distance you had put between yourself and the shop of oddities.

"Thief!! Stop her!!!" The shop keeper started yelling and causing a commotion, so you did the most logical thing you could think of.

You ran. Down the alleyway and down the street.

"Shit," you cursed to yourself as you dodged the streetfolk.

Only recently did you get a high bounty, being worth 100,000,000 belly, dead or alive. You attacked a Marine base and managed to flatten the entire building because some oppressive Marines were abusing your little coven. Your witches weren't the strongest but they were kind women with warm hearts. When one of them, Grandmother Poppyseed, refused to comply to their demands any longer, they killed her in front of your eyes. You were so filled with rage that you attacked the Marines for revenge. Not your proudest moment but you don't regret a single thing. You free your coven and gave back the stolen goods the Marines had taken from your fellow witches. But, because of your bounty, you had to leave them. You couldn't make yourself put them in harm's way. So you left to pursue your dream, landing you here. Running from a shop keeper.

You made a sharp turn, hoping to shake anyone who was on your tail, and ran right into someone. Their skin was so . . . . rubbery? Wait. . .

You know this skin. You've felt the rubber before.

"Uuugggghhh. . . what the?" It was. It was Luffy!! You had him sandwiched (hehehehe sand witched) between your bust and the cobblestone ground. "What's goin on?"

"Luffy!! Is it really you?!" You squealed, throwing your arms around him in a tight hug. He rubbed his eyes and looked up at you with a perplexed look on his face before his eyes brightened and shone like the sunlight bouncing off the ocean waters. He wrapped his rubber arms around you three or four times and squeezed, his legs wrapping around your waist, causing the pair of you to roll over giggling like morons.

"Y/n!! Its been so long!! I'm so happy to see you!!" He buried his face in your neck like he always used to and you squeezed him tighter. Its been years since you've seen him. Of course you kept up with the News Coo and read all about him as well as supported him in spirit, but you never thought you'd run into him. Literally.

"Luffy! I can't believe it!" You pulled away just enough to look at him, cupping his cheeks in your hands tenderly. You smirked and squeezed and pulled on them, making him make all kinds of faces.

"Oooowww! Y/n/n at uuurrrtttssss!!!" (That hurts!) He whined and pouted, unhooking his arms around around your curved waist to nurse his cheeks. You two were so lost in each other's world that you completely missed the several stunned faces staring at you. Luffy's Nakama, the Straw Hats, were watching this little reunion in utter confusion.

"Can someone explain to me what the hell is happening? Is- does Luffy have a-?"

"Y/n/n has been my best friend since we were kids! Isn't that right, y/n/n?" Luffy interrupted a beautiful young girl with short orange hair. You nodded in response and wrapped your arms around his shoulders, his hugging your waist.

"Sorry, Lu. I didn't mean to just run into you." You stood up and offered him your hand, to which he took and stood up. You opened your mouth to intoduce yourself until a man with big pink heart eyes and yellow hair threw himself at your feet.

"Oh Y/n-swan!! You're absolutely gorgeous!! Your smooth s/c skin, your h/c hair, your beautiful perfect eyes!! You're perfect!! Please, find it in your heart, marry me!!" He squealed as he took your form in. Your curves, your bust, your long legs. He was practically drooling until the green haired swordsman smacked him with the hilt of one of his . . . three swords?

"Damn ero-cook." He rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Teme!! You dare swear in front of such a lovely woman?!??" The yellow haired man growled, practically on fire. You chuckled and slung an arm over Luffy's shoulders.

"Its all good. I'm Y/n. I knew Luffy when he was a snot nosed brat." You bumped him with his hip and he pouted.

"Its nice to meetcha. Im Nami." The orange haired woman spoke up with a smile. "Ero-cook is named Sanji and the green Morimo is Zoro. That guy is Usopp." She pointed to each guy.

"Hi! I'm Usopp!!" He puffed his chest out to look more manly and you snorted at him. "I'm the strongest sniper you'll ever meet!"

"I'm sure. Its nice to meet you all too." You smiled, resting your hand on your hip.

"What're you doing here, Y/n/n?" Luffy spoke up, tilting his head and making you smile softly at your childhood friend's cuteness.

"I was just doing some shopping for my next potion. I'm hoping to make the first potion that let's devil fruit users able to swim again." You smiled proudly and Luffy's eyes practically popped out of his head.

"NANI?!?!?!" The whole crew exclaimed in unison.

"Its not possible, though! Devil fruit users make the ocean hate them. You couldn't possibly undo something like that." Usopp's jaw looked like it needed to be lifted off the ground with a forklift and you laughed lightly at the sight.

"Do you know how much money you could make if you made one of those?!?" Nami screeched and buried her fingers in her hair.

You shrugged, "Probably a lot. But I'm not interested in the money."

". . . . can I have it then?" Nami pursed her lips in a puppy faced pout that Sanji gushed over and Zoro rolled his eyes at.

"I guess. I'm still in the process of figuring things out but its hard because I dont have anyone to test it on. I'm not a devil fruit user." You peaked into your bag and grabbed your prototype. It was a green and orange thin liquid that sloshed around in the purple vial you had it stored in. "This isn't the final product but with this I got fairly close according to my limited research." You were about to put it away when Luffy took it from your hands.

"Ill test it for you!" He chimed happily, opening the vial. A foul smell came from the green and orange steam that floated out of the vial.

"Luffy, it could be dangerous! Its not-"

Before you could continue further, he doesn't the whole thing and made you facepalm.

"Ew!! Y/n/n, that's gross!!" He stuck his tongue out and made a face. "Now I feel sick." He whined and clutched his stomach.

"She tried to tell you. Baka." Usopp spoke and shook his head and so did the rest of the crew.

"I have some golden ginger root that's really good for stomach aches when you make tea out of it. If you like, I can make some." You offered, shrugging your shoulders.

"Yay!! Y/n/n is coming back to our ship!!" Luffy squealed happily.

"Yay!! Y/n-swan!!!" Sanji squealed along side Luffy. This was perfect. You got to be with Luffy again and you got away from being in trouble.

"You guys go ahead. I need to do some shopping." Nami slung her satchel full of belly over her shoulder.

"Me too," Zoro agreed and started walking off.

"I better go with him to make sure he doesn't get lost." Usopp ran after Zoro and Nami split off as well with a smile and a wave.

"I actually need to get groceries. Luffy, do you remember where we left the ship?" Sanji asked like the responsible adult he really wasn't. But he was the most responsible one left.

". . . . yes." He pouted and held his stomach.

"You don't. Just go that way. Its the Going Merry." Sanji explained to you gently and pointed in the general direction.

"Sounds good. Luffy will recognize her when he sees her." You nod and take Luffy's hand in his, just like when you were kids. "Be safe on your grocery run. Marines are crawling all over this place. We'll be back after a couple of hours." You smile and lead Luffy towards where Sanji pointed. You were a little surprised at how quickly the crew seemed to have trusted you but you assumed it was mostly because you were so close with their captain.

It was a fairly short walk to the Going Merry. You boarded the ship, helping a complaining Luffy to his seat.

"You should know not to drink my potions without asking me first. Remember my fire resistant potion? Your arms had to get all wrapped up." You giggled when you remember Luffy purposely pissing off Ace to make him punch Luffy in the arm and practically light him on fire. You gently smile and bend down so you were shorter than him. "Are you alright? Does it still hurt?"

"You make me feel better, so my tummy is better." He wrapped his arms around your waist and bury his face in your breasts. "Soft~"

"You're such a baby." You giggle and take his hat, putting it on your head. He always let you take his hat without a fuss, but if anyone other than you ever touched his hat he would freak. Softly, your fingers ran through his black locks and massaged his scalp. He let out a small sigh of appreciation and let his muscles and body relax at your touch.

"I missed you, Y/n/n." He spoke up.

"I miss you too, Lu. I'm glad to see you're ok. I got worried when I stopped hearing from you." You pulled on his cheek a little bit, watching it stretch.

"I know. I got my crew and my ship and how all I gotta do is find One Piece and become King of the Pirates." He mumbled into your flesh and squeezed you tightly. "Y/n."

"Hm?" You kissed his forehead sweetly, like you always do when you cuddled when you were children.

"Become my nakama." The way he spoke didn't leave any room for argument.

"Lu, I'm a witch with a big ass bounty on my head. I'm not so sure-"

"My bounty is bigger than yours!! I'm worth 500,000,000!! Zoro is worth 320,000,00!! It doesnt matter. BECOME MY NAKAMA!!!!! AND WHEN THATS OVER BE MY PIRATE QUEEN!!!!!!" He jumped up, his stomach ache forgotten completely. To say you were shocked would be an understatement, but you had no problems with it.

"Ok."

"Yay!!! That was easy. Now, can I have some tea? My tummy hurts." He rubbed his stomach and pouted.

"Luffy, you're such a dumbass." You giggled and got to work boiling the water. ". . . . . Queen of the Pirates, huh?"

Luv: welp. That's a thing I did. It was long. Feel free to leave comments, suggestions, anything! ❤ 😊

#one piece x reader #luffy imagines #luffy #monkey d. luffy #luffy x reader

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silvanils · 4 years

Text

Stranded

Written for a TES Tuesday prompt given by Alexis in the @nirnwrote discord: Syrus - sand, thunderstorm, sunburn.

I realized I haven’t written all three siblings interacting yet, and that needed remedied as much as the sunburn one of them has in this fic. <3

For reference, Syrus is about 17-18 during this, and the twins are 12.

Thunder crackled in the distance, making Aril whine and cup his ears while Eira winced and glanced at the sky nervously. Syrus tried to ignore it as he tugged their gear out of their small, capsized fishing boat, which was currently stuck sideways in the sand. They were lucky their stuff hadn’t been washed away by the waves that had stranded them here.

Of course, they would have been even luckier if the twins had listened to Syrus earlier when he’d suggested they go home to avoid the coming storm. “Come on, both of you. We’ll be safer if we find shelter in the cliffs — we can’t even try to head home until this blows over.”

At least they listened this time and followed Syrus as he made his way along the beach. It didn’t take long to find a little shallow cave, where he propped their gear up against a wall. “Now, we just need to find something we can try to make a fire with…”

“Will these do?” Eira asked, holding out some driftwood chunks. “I picked them up while we were walking.”

Despite still being a little mad, Syrus couldn’t hold back a small smile. “You and your sticky fingers… yes, those look dry enough to work.”

“Good thing, too,” Aril piped up, his ears perking up to listen in as the rain outside became a roaring, torrential downpour. “I don’t think anything out there will be dry enough to use for a while.”

Syrus huffed a bit as he dug out a little dip where he soon started setting up the wood to make a fire. The twins settled in nearby — Aril hugging his knees close as he rocked back and forth slowly to soothe himself while Eira started to poke and press at her bare arms and shoulders, wincing each time she touched her own skin.

“Burnt?” Syrus asked, one silver eyebrow going up as he used a little destruction magic to spark a flame. “I told you to put on sun-block ointment — or wear a sleeved shirt.”

“Shut up,” Eira said, her cheeks flushing a darker red. “It’s not that bad.”

“Yes it is,” Aril chided, wincing in empathy as he reached out and delicately put a hand on her shoulder. “Your skin feels like it’s on fire!”

“Ow! Hey, don’t touch it!” She smacked his hand away. “Not unless you’re gonna heal it, anyways!”

“I would,” Aril sighed, tucking his arm back around his legs. “Except I used pretty much all of my energy trying to save the ship earlier. I’m drained.”

“I packed some healing ointments in my bag,” Syrus said, still stoking the fire. “I always make sure I bring some, since you two always seem to attract trouble...”

Aril got up and scrambled over to the bags before Syrus could stop him, opening one to dumping its contents on the sand as Syrus watched in horror. “No! That was organized!”

“Oops, sorry,” Aril said, grinning sheepishly as he bent over and plucked up a few vials to look at them. Syrus had also neatly labeled everything — which was also a good thing. Aril scrunched his nose up as he shuffled through the vials. “Poison, poison, potent poison…”

Eira gave Syrus a look. “Why bring all those on a fishing trip? You can’t poison fish — well, not if you’re planning to eat it. That’s just dumb.”

“Haha, poison poisson...” Aril mumbled to himself, giggling a little as he set aside some of the vials. Syrus pressed a hand to his face, unable to hold back another groan. “She’s right, though. This is a lot for a fishing trip.”

“I told you, I had that organized — all my best alchemical mixtures are in there. Good and bad. The one you’re looking for will have a blue or green label, Aril. Not red or black.”

“Oh, okay.” Aril set aside several more vials, then grinned as he held up a blue one. “Aha! Mild healing ointment! Or should I use potent…?”

“Mild should do the trick for this,” Syrus said, clapping his hands together as he admired the nice little fire that was finally flickering in front of him. “Potent is for bad wounds. You know — deep cuts, animal bites, that sort of thing.”

Aril nodded, kneeling down next to Eira again as he removed the stopper with his teeth (once again making Syrus grimace and shudder) so he could pour it out and start slathering it over her sunburnt skin. Syrus let them deal with that as he went over to his bag and started organizing the vials in earnest, frowning at how strewn about they were.

So much disorder, caused by one reckless moment. It never mattered how neat and tidy he kept his things — he couldn’t control every factor. Another streak of lightning filled the sky, and all three elves winced as thunder boomed around them. This storm was another great example.

Syrus frowned again as he tucked his potions away in silence. If it had been up to him, he would’ve gone home early and avoided this mess completely. But Aril’s pleading puppy eyes and Eira’s pout had won against his better judgement.

“Fine, fifteen more minutes. Then we go home.”

He had never been able to say no to them, and… they knew he never would.

“Ow! Ah, that stings! Syrus, what did you put in this?”

“Mm? Oh, that’s probably the juniper berry mixture — it’s supposed to give it just a bit of a tingly cooling sensation.” He tugged his journal out to double check his notes as he made his way back to the fire.

“Well, it’s more like a prickly… pricking sensation! Ow!”

Syrus nodded sagely, scratching down a new note next to one of his old ones. “I see… I’ll have to adjust the amounts slightly next time. Less parasol moss, more… garlic, maybe?”

“There’s garlic in this?!” Eira’s voice squeaked in disbelief. “What?”

“Garlic does have a lot of healing properties,” Aril said, slowly, as if not quite sure who he agreed with. “But… it might not be great for skin.”

“You think?!” Eira asked, tears visibly welling up in her eyes before she turned away from the fire, sniffling as she buried her face into her arms.

“Okay, noted. I’ll use something completely different next time. Sorry.”

“It’s okay,” Eira sighed, scooting away from Aril. “It’ll be better by morning, I’m sure. And if not, Aril might be able to use some restoration magic then instead — right?”

“Yeah, if I can get any sleep tonight,” Aril sighed, cupping his ears as another wave of thunder rolled around them. The rain was still heavy, too. “It’s so loud…”

“I can fix that,” Syrus said, quickly weaving a silencing spell around them. “There. Better?”

“Much,” Aril said, leaning back until he was sprawled on the sandy floor of the cave. He was quiet for a few minutes before he turned his head to face Syrus and smile. “It’s so peaceful… Like we’re not caught in a storm at all. A modified muffle spell, right?”

“Mmhm. Just made it so we can’t hear what’s outside the cave, instead of the other way around. Good catch, Aril.”

“I never would’ve thought to use it like that,” he said, grinning. “You’re so smart, Sy.”

“Bah, you’re just flattering me to get back on my good side. It won’t work.”

Aril sighed rolled over completely, flashing the puppy eyes at Syrus again. Eira, however, just smirked and raised an eyebrow — she was far too clever for her own good.

“It won’t work because you weren’t on my bad side to begin with, Aril. Neither of you was, though… Eira’s really been pushing my boundaries lately.”

“I can’t help it — you make such funny faces when you notice your things are out of place!” She grinned and threw her hands up, then relaxed a bit and shook her head. “I’ll try to do it less often, though, if it really bothers you that much.”

Syrus smiled again as he put his journal away and checked his bag one more time, making sure everything was sorted properly. “If you give me your word on that, I can sweeten the deal,” he offered. “I’ll make some specialty potions, just for you.”

He could tell by the way Eira’s eyes glittered that he had her — hook, line, and sinker. “Really? What kind of potions are we talking about? Could you make me invisible? Or able to carry as much as a horse?”

Syrus laughed aloud at that one, shaking his head. “Maybe… but those sorts of potions need much rarer ingredients. I’d have to… acquire them.”

“Not a problem,” Eira said, giggling. “I have ways. And you have a deal.” She held out her hand, and Syrus smiled as he reached out to shake it.

“Yay, glad you made up,” Aril sighed, glaring at both of them. “Now will you please be quiet? I want to get some rest while this spell lasts.”

“Okay, okay…” Eira sighed, wincing as she curled up under her blanket, her burnt skin clearly still making everything uncomfortable. Syrus leaned up against the wall and closed his eyes, but he only pretended to nod off until he was sure his younger siblings were fast asleep.

Then he opened his eyes again to watch the storm — and make sure his wards stayed up the skies were clear. There was a glimmer of light on the horizon as Syrus finally closed his eyes.

If he was lucky, it would still be a few more hours before he was needed again.

#elder scrolls #skyrim #skyrim ocs #nirnwrote #tes tuesdays #;Syrus Silvanil #;Eira Silvanil #;Aril Silvanil #;knight writes

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dothemacarena · 4 years

Text

a new wild dnd session to scream about online

This session started with us dealing with a t-rex which we left off on as a cliff hanger. This was the least interesting part of the session.

the characters in this story are: Jomu my kenku fighter, Jond @pippenpaddlopsicopolisthethird a tabaxi rogue, Lwdd @spontaneousmusicalnumber our elf bard, and Veritas @chimpoot a wizard rogue who turns into a dragon born on nights near a full moon like 7 nights a month.

Many sessions ago and weeks ago in game the Jond admitted under zone of truth that he had a crush on someone before promptly running away as fast has he could, which is very fast.

The party decided not to press him on it and wait for him to be ready to talk about it, but did not necessarily give up trying to figure it out/set him up in some way.

After fighting the T rex which ended up being a rather quick fight we travel montaged for two days and then sent Jond to sneak into a town for supplies while we waited. While waiting a Remorhaz attacked. This thing did dealt fire damage whenever it got hit with a melee weapon and tended to focus attacks on one creature. The fight starts Lwdd sends Jond a message and he manages to get back fast enough to get the first attack in. My character can usually tank their way through most fights with 21 ac and 98 hp going into this fight wasn’t too worried even with the damage taken every time I hit.

First round starts Jond attacks, Lwdd attacks, and Veritas uses his breath weapon which for him does a random wand of wonder thing. In this case that random thing is that his mind leaves his body and goes into someone else’s his body works on autopilot and can do physical attacks and his mind can cast spells. He rolls a d4 and the dice says it is Jond’s body. Que loud distressed “can he read my mind?” after a dice roll it was decided that the answer is no. Lwdd and Jomu don’t know this has happened his body is still moving around. The remorhaz fails to bite Jomu and Jomu attacks taking about 12 points of damage each turn.

Second round Jond attacks, Lwdd attacks, and Veritas uses mirror image to make there be 3 more Jonds. This thing gets manages to successfully bite me dealing fifty something damage. I am in its mouth restrained and grappled. I struggle and manage to stab it once forgetting that that does more damage to me so I second wind to heal a bit.

Third round more attacks happen, Lwdd heals me a bit and it is not enough as this thing manages to do exactly enough damage to knock Jomu unconscious and swallows him so he can’t be healed. My turn one failed death save

another round goes by the remorhaz thankfully misses a bite attack on Lwdd which might have been able to down our healer in one attack and his stomach acid does damage to Jomu leading to an automatic failed death save, and I roll and fail my third death save and the race is on. It is now that I will mention my character dying is also not even close to the most interesting thing to happen this session.

Over the next round the party manages to kill the monster and then they manage to cut it open and revivify Jomu before I am gone for good Jomu talks to the one god he is friends with. We go to the town to rest but don’t go to sleep right away because we haven’t been awake that long but we aren’t going to keep adventuring with the tank on deaths door so we have some down time.

Veritas tries to read a book but because of plot reasons all of the words have been turned into the word become. So Lwdd pulls out her book that has the most pictures I can’t remember its title rn but it is along the lines of Dwarfs getting down and dirty, and is basically a dwarf Kama Sutra. Lwdd starts trying to make memes out of the pictures with the word become under them.

Jond goes outside to practice and Veritas follows after a while to try and fish for information on the crush or on any other secrets there might be, “so anything you want to talk about”. Because he knows he couldn’t read Jond’s mind but Jond doesn’t. Jond however shuts him down without him getting any info and he returns to the tent.

Then Lwdd goes to talk to Jond and asks how he knew he was in love. He explains how he knew and goes and after asking her to promise not to tell reveals to her that his crush is on Veritas. Lwdd listens to the reasoning rolling a high deception roll to keep a straight face and then after Jond had finished talking said “I need to go have a problem now” promptly dimension doors away.

While that conversation was happening Veritas was asking Jomu if now (while in the relative safety of the city) is a good time to give Jond some catnip and lock him in a room with Jomu (because the three of us had decided out of game of course Jond’s crush is on Jomu he always talks about how strong Jomu is and that one time a guy came to our table and said hey beautiful to Lwdd Jond responded with “yes Jomu is quite beautiful” and when they were trying out for some positions he encouraged Jomu to go for one of the highest ranks instead of a lower easier one because “of course you can do it Jomu your amazing”)

Jond comes back to where we’re staying to find out why Lwdd teleported away so quickly only to find she is not there like he assumed. We ask about the conversation and Jond says I don’t think I said anything mean to her or that would have gotten her angry. Jond tells us that she said I need to go have a problem before she teleported away. In the parties mind this means one of two things if Jond really said nothing to upset her either she is having some digestional issues and had to go poop or she is going to go get in a fight with someone. The only person we know in this town is the mayor so that must be who she is going to fisticuffs with so we start walking to his house which takes 20 min

Meanwhile Lwdd teleported south of town an cast silence on herself before screaming. when the silence ran out after 10 minutes she did it again,

We get to the mayors house ask the guards if they have seen or heard her (no) so we decide to head back and if she isn’t there and doesn’t show up after 15 min we will start looking for her, she can message us if she needs help.

We get back and there is a tiny hut dome colored black filling half of the tent we are staying in. It won’t let us through we knock and say “hey Lwdd is that you? It’s ok if you want some time alone but it could be any magical person in there and we need to make sure it’s you” she responds with it’s me an won’t say anything else prompting us to go outside to try and figure out what is wrong with her out of her hearing range.

After needling Jond a about what they discussed to try and find out what is wrong Jond tells us that he talked to her about who is crush is, but he still won’t tell us who it is. We come up with three possibilities of why she is upset.

1) She has a crush on Jond and is upset it isn’t her.

2) She has a crush on the same person as Jond.

3) While we were away she looked at more Dwarf’s Getting Down and Dirty and needed some private time.

We resolve to let her know we are here for her and she can talk to us about anything if she needs to but not push her on why she is upset in the morning. We also all leveled up during the night because we beat the remorhaz yay.

Come morning we get ready to head out. While Jond is off filling canteens Jomu asks once again if she is ok and with one bad deception roll gives her a big hug.

Two days of tense traveling pass before one night Lwdd asks Jomu to take watch with her. Jomu seeing this as her wanting to talk like was offered is glad to accept and after the others are definitely asleep she talks. At first it is very hard to give advice as she is talking very quickly and vaguely in a jumbled mess. Eventually Jomu calms her down a bit and explains that Jond already told us what you talked about and what is upsetting you has to be one of three things. Replacing private time because that wouldn’t cause all of this tension in the air with Jond confessed to you and you had to turn him down.

Lwdd tries to avoid saying who Jond’s crush was on because she promised she wouldn’t. “hypothetically if you had a crush on the same person as a friend what would you do? Confess to the person, or tell the friend you have the same crush, or just do nothing and hope the feeling go away or tell the crush that we both have a crush on them and let them choose.” Jomu;s advice is that ultimately it is up to the person you have a crush on to decide who they like more or if everyone is open to an triad or an open relationship, but I definitely don’t think not doing anything is the right answer because you have been not doing anything for two days and it has been really tense.

After some dramatic high school drama along the lines of what if I am lonely and miserable for the next 1000 years, Jomu mentioned that “none of us are going to live as long as Lwdd. Unless you do some weird necromancy I’m sure if it doesn’t work out with this crush you will move on. You will have other friends and loved ones in your life and that is ok.” “is this a bad time to say that I learned some weird necromancy spells recently” “a little and please don’t necromance me for the full 1000 years of your life you can go for 100 years right after I die if you need comfort or help in a fight but please learn to move on”Jomu thinking she would necromance all of her friends and just wanting to be clear that she can necromancy my body for a little but not forever and she then slips by saying “I don’t have a crush on you!” proving that her and Jond both have a crush on Veritas.

Jomu thinks for a bit getting used to knowing both party members have a crush on Veritas who is a certified dumbass and eventually gives the advice to talk to Jond about it. Maybe you both eventually confess to Veritas or one of you decides to root for the other but confessing to Veritas with out letting Jond know in advance would be betraying Jond and letting Veritas know you both have a crush would be breaking your promise to Jond to not tell anyone, and we already know that bottling it up and not doing anything doesn’t work for you since the past two days have shown us that. So you need to talk to Jond. It probably won’t go as poorly as you are thinking you guys are too good of friends for having a crush on the same guy to ruin it. maybe it will make your bond stronger you can take watches at night together and talk about how cute his butt is or whatever it is you guys see in him that I don’t. Lwdd says she will and makes Jomu promise that he wont tell anyone about this conversation. Jomu promises and has no plans to break her trust. Lwdd then says “Jomu do you trust me” “of course we have been through so much together and just two days ago you brought me back to life”

Lwdd pats Jomu on the head and casts modify memory.

Jomu successfully wisdom saves.

A quick scramble of Jomu instinctively resisted not because I don’t trust Lwdd and do I know what spell that was no I have never seen it before but it doesn’t feel like zone of truth which would make sense if she just wanted to be sure I was truthful in my promise. Lwdd awkwardly says “good talk” to having the spell not work. Jomu says “Hey I do trust you and I promise I am not going to tell anyone”

end of session

#dnd #crazy session #death #romance #drama #love triangles

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crystalninjaphoenix · 5 years

Text

The Magnificent Guide to Magic

Magic, Magick, and Black Magic

Okay, since most people in the world don’t even know magic exists, let’s start with the basics. What is it? What are the rules? Does black magic exist? Why did I write magic a second time but with a k at the end? All in due time, my hypothetical readers.

So where does magic come from? I don’t fucking know, why are you asking me? Yeah, there are magicians who dedicate themselves to figuring out why magic exists, but I’m sure as hell not one of them. All you need to know is that some people have it. Any fantasy book would tell you that sometimes people are just born with magic. And in that case, they’re right. Though sometimes you don’t realize you have it until you read out a spell for shits and giggles and a puff of green smoke appears (not that I would know anything about that.) Like I said, usually older magicians can sense others with magic, and tell them what the deal is.

Magic’s gonna appear in about one in a hundred people. Of the ones with magic, some are gonna want to become magicians full-time, some are gonna dabble, and some are gonna ignore it. Matter of choice. There’s enough of us that decided to do it full time that there’s a whole community, and they tend to gather together. You have cities that are disproportionally full of magicians, like, say, the city I live in. Which makes it even more amazing that nobody found me or I didn’t figure out my powers for a long ass time.

Is there any particular factor that makes a kid more likely to have magic? Eh. It’s like weird genetics. If your parents have magic, you might too. If one parent has magic and the other doesn’t, the kid has a 50% chance of getting it passed to them. Both do, the odds jump to about 75%. You still have a 15% chance of not being magical. From there, if you have magic ancestors far back, you have a chance at magicianhood, but the odds decrease the farther back you go. Also, there’s about 30% of the magic population that are “first generation,” meaning there’s no magic in their bloodline at all, it just decided to pop into existence one day in this kid’s soul. I’m pretty sure I’m one of those. Why first generations appear, nobody knows. Some think it’s something to do with souls, which are apparently where magic located? Look, if you came here for magic theory you came to the wrong place, I know jack shit about it.

And another thing: some magicians are just gonna be born more powerful than others. Like any other genetics. If the parents are strong, the kid is probably gonna be strong. Probably. Apparently that’s, like, the case barely 2/3 of the time. Magic’s fucking wild, man, it does its own thing when it comes to how strong someone is. But here’s a thing! DON’T ASSUME THAT BECAUSE YOU’RE NATURALLY MORE POWERFUL IT MEANS YOU’RE AUTOMATICALLY SKILLED. Practice is what makes someone good at magic, not natural talent. Picture, like, a big buff dude, been buff all their life, going up against this other dude who’s smaller but had years of martial arts training. Big buff dude is gonna be the one to get knocked the fuck out. Ya wanna be a good magician, you practice.

Now, if you’re a normal person, I bet you’re wondering “well this is super fucking unfair, I don’t even get a chance to do cool magic shit?” And this is where things get complicated. I know basically nothing about this, but apparently there’s a very very VERY rare way for ordinary people to get magic. It’s called “Aghenion Magic” and it only shows up in specific circumstances. From how I understand it, there’s a person, has no magic but has been exposed to it before, and they really need to do something. No, I don’t mean they’re really hungry and need to eatt, I mean that this person concentrates so hard on doing or getting this one thing, generally a concept or idea like “I want to be strong” or “I want to help people”, that their soul actually changes and gives them magic. But that’s not all! This needs to be accompanied with a sudden change of mentality, like you’ve been in a bad place and now you’re better off, or you’re just so angry at the world and you just snap. Also, people who get aghenion magic usually have at least one traumatic event in their past. Maybe it’s required, I dunno, the whole thing is way too complicated for me, this is just what I know.

Aghenion magic isn’t like normal magic. It’s a magic that is tailored to whatever you wanted at the time. It can do anything, as long as it serves that purpose. So if you change your mind on your goal, well too bad, you’re stuck with this magic for the rest of your life! Yay! Aghenion is completely subconscious too, so you probably didn’t even ask for it! Look, I can see a dozen problems caused in this kinda situation, so I’m glad I just had it and didn’t have to jump through magic hoops to be able to light shit on fire with my mind.

But if you don’t have magic, don’t worry, you can always have magick. Yes it’s supposed to be spelled that way, I know it’s confusing especially when you’re talking, just try to put an extra emphasis on the K sound at the end. While magic is a power a person is born with inside them, magick is a series of rituals and practices where the power comes from talismans, runes, and other items. Think tarot cards and fortune telling. Usually people who use magick (they’re called witches) aren’t actually magically-gifted, they just have the right tools. Magick is a little bit tricky, because it’s really easy to fake it. You know, like charlatans, who shouldn’t get such a cool word to describe their faking nature.

I don’t know a lot about magick, usually I just ask JJ for help in that department. But I know that the lines between magick and magic can get pretty blurred, as you sometimes need tools for magic that look like tools for magick, or sometimes magicians adapt spells that witches made or vice versa. So I advise anyone without magic trying to get into magick to double check every spell you get, it might actually be a magic spell that’s just weirdly similar to magick.

But anyway, because I’m a magician and not a witch, I’m gonna write about magic. And by now I’m getting to that third part of this section, which I’m sure everyone has been looking forward to: black magic.

For starters, is there any obvious difference between normal magic and the dark kind? Well, yeah. See, magic has a rule. The more powerful a spell you’re trying to cast, the more exhausted you’ll be afterward. Every magician has a limited well of power, and when you reach the bottom there’s a good chance you’ll die, or if you’re lucky you’ll just drain your supply and have no more magic anymore. Black magic breaks these two rules. You’re gonna be tired after casting a black magic spell, but not nearly as much as you should be. And when you run out of power, you don’t actually run out of power, and you don’t die or lose it afterwards.

Now maybe you’re thinking, “hey, that sounds kinda cool, black magic can’t be that bad!” NO. YOU FOOL. I ASSURE YOU ITS NOT WORTH IT. Because black magic spells may not drain your magic, but they need energy to run, so they take it from somewhere else. That can be your physical body, so you waste away, or it can be your memories, so you slowly forget yourself, or it can be your fucking sanity. That’s right, you can literally go insane from using black magic. If you start hearing voices, or if you start getting random mood swings, or if you start withdrawing from society, those are the warning signs and you need to get the fuck out of the black magic hole before you dig it too deep to climb out.

So, how can you tell which spells to avoid? Black magic spells are usually destructive to other lifeforms or unfairly beneficial to the caster, but that’s not a garuntee since there are regular magic spells like that. Generally, there will be something in the instructions like “This spell won’t make you tired” but the thing the spell does should make you tired. Or they’ll slap warnings on the spell, which you should totally listen to. READ THE WARNINGS AND YOU’LL SAVE YOURSELF A LOT OF TROUBLE. Black magic spells don’t usually deceive you, they’re pretty open about what they are and what they can do. And if sometimes you don’t, you just gotta go with your instincts. If it feels sketchy, don’t take the chance.

Another way to tell is if your magic starts changing color. That’s a huge fucking red flag that you’ve been using black magic. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that. Every magician has a natural magic color that’s special to them. Mine is green, for example. There are spells to make, like, colored lights and shit, but the natural color won’t change. Unless you start using black magic. Say I conjure a fireball. It would usually be green, but if I’ve been using black magic, then the tips of the fire at the edge would turn purple a different color. Let’s say purple. The purple is going to creep closer to the center of the magic the more black magic I use. If someone has two colors in their spells, run, they’re a black magic magician. I mean, maybe someone has one color and is still using black magic, but that means their magic has completely changed color, and they’re too far gone.

This is all stuff I’ve heard about and studied, of course. Not something I’ve experienced.

Okay, just banged on the closet door a little bit and they’re still not letting me out. Fuck the closet wasn’t this small before was it I remember saying it was a fairly big closet I mean it could be worse couldnt it at least theyre going to actually let me out hopefully

I guess I have to write more entries for this, then. Fine. Remind me to actually curse these two later Let’s keep going.

#please let me know if this goes on too long my worldbuilding can get intense #jacksepticeye #jacksepticeye fanfiction #jacksepticegos #septic egos #marvin the magnificent #brigid writes fanfiction #magnificent guide to magic

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epic-summaries · 5 years

Text

British LegendsXPokémon

Morgana/Morgan le Fay

She was known to have studied magic while she was being brought up in the nunnery.

Le Morte Darthur from Thomas Mallory, I took the one off Wikipedia.

Welcome to our witchy fairy. Yay!

Delphox is a witch. Morgana is a witch. That’s the logic.

Morgana is the second child of Gorlois and Igraine. When she was young, Gorlois got each one of his daughters a Pokémon from his trip to Kalos (he had pledge his allegiance to Aurelius). Fennekin chose her. (Morgause got Nidoran female and Elaine got a Skitty). Morgana was so happy. She and Fennekin spent every second together. They encouraged each other to learn magic. Fennekin would grab a stick wave it around like a magic wand. Morgana practice potions and used the sticks Fennekin would chose to stir the cauldrons.

The night Gorlois died and Uthyr took Tintagel, Morgana and Fennekin were hiding with her sisters. Morgause tried to protect them with her Kakuna and Nidoran, they weren’t battle prepared. It was Fennekin evolving that helped. The three girls ran to the beach and hid behind the cliffs. Only Igraine was able to find them and brought her girls home.

Now, Morgana and Braixen were often found in the forest (only almost causing a forest fire once) where they practiced magic. They learned darker and darker magic.

Also, Braixen once used his stick to make Uthyr’s clothes catch fire. That’s when Uthyr was like “take thee to a nunnery!” (:P). That backfired (pun intended) because she learned necromancy there.

He was a Braixen for most of Morgana’s teenage years. He only evolved when Morgana was married off to Urien. There was a Saxon attack. Urien had his team of Pokémon and Morgana had her. They battled and battled. Morgana and Braixen fought the chief of the skirmish. Braixen was about to lose against the Poliwrath. But he did not give up for Morgana and he evolved into the Delphox. Then kicked that tadpole’s ass with his psychic power.

Delphox is Morgana’s best friend and fellow student. They encourage each other to be the most powerful version of each other as they can.

His moveset is Future Sight, Mystic Fire, Magic Room and Psychic.

I wanted to give Morgana mega and any excuse to add ghost Pokémon. And this is a vindictive Pokémon. It works in personality.

Morgana had a doll she named Modron (:P). She used to play with it and sleep with it. Then, Uthyr came along and sent Morgana to the nunnery. After a cruel joke from fellow students, Modron was found ripped. Morgana cried since it was a reminder from when she was happy with her parents and sisters. Braixen found a book and Morgana decided to fix Modron with magic. And it worked? Well Modron is now a Shuppet.

It didn’t take Modron long to become a Banette, since Shuppets feed on feelings of vindictiveness and vengeance and Morgana has those feelings towards Uthyr and later Arthur and Guinevere (mainly Guinevere).

And it did not take long for Morgana to find a mega stone. Morgana is all about that power and magic.

Her moveset is Hex, Phantom Force, Grudge and Sucker Punch.

Shiinotic is partly based off of fairy rings! When I found that out I’m like yeah, I’m putting it on Morgana aka Morgan le Fay’s team. Plus mushrooms are great for potions. They can poison and they can heal. I like to think Shiinotic heals humans but poison dragons. Uthyr is the dragon master and Morgana having a fairy poison that can kill them is great. (These things better be in Galar btw.)

Morgana found Morelull on a moonless night in the forest. She was summoning Darkrai so they (Darkrai is genderless) could haunt Uthyr’s dreams. Morelull was guiding Morgana to the best place. Then Morelull followed her home. Morgana just kind of started using her as a lamp. Braixen and her then started to use Morelull’s powders for potions, mostly sleep potions at first.

When Morelull evolved she starts using Shiinotic for other potions, like healing ones or darker ones.

Morgana and Morgause mixed a poison with Shiinotic’s spores and Morgause’s poison team to kill Uthyr.

Shiinotic’s moveset is Moonblast, Giga Drain, Spore, Dream Eater and Twinkle Tackle (giving Gen 7 Pokémon Z moves cause why not)

It’s a witch.

On night in the forest, Murkrow attacked Morelull because oooh shiny. Morgana catched her.

Morgana likes to use Murkrow for spying on her enemies. During the war with Arthur, Arthur changed all Murkrow after Merlin told him about Morgana’s.

After Morgana and Arthur became allies, Murkrow once stole Arthur’s crown, because shiny gold.

Her moveset is Wing Attack, Haze (I think Morgana would like that one of her Pokémon can create a fog), Thief and Dark Pulse.

It’s a witch and reading the Pokédex entries it’s more of a witch then Murkrow.

Mismagius was haunting Morgana’s daughter, Morfydd, who was five at the time. Morfydd followed her mother in the haunted forest and that’s how Mismagius found her.

To help her child, and also giving Owain and Morfydd a Pokémon catching tutorial, she caught Mismagius.

Morgana used Mismagius to curse people and to give her enemies hallucinations. Mismagius was more than glad to do it. Mismagius was also glad to cast helpful spells too. Mismagius and Delphox were close friends. They liked to push each other.

Her moveset is Magical Leaf, Shadow Ball, Spite and Lucky Chant.

A. Sylveon is a fairy, Morgana is le Fay. B. Sylveon is my favourite eeveelution and in my top ten favourite Pokémon. C. Sylveon evolves with love. Hence is my tool for her redemption arc.

After the war with Arthur, Arthur gives Morgana a peace offering, an Eevee. (I’m a fan of paragon of good Arthur.) She was surprised. She was his enemy. She lost the war. Why would he give her a gift? She was going to make him pay for winning the war and forgiving her. She tried to dethrone him again. But he forgave her again. He was Uthyr’s son?! How can he be like this? She went to him, he asked for her opinion on important matters. Soon, she started to see him as the brother he was to her. That is when Eevee evolves into Sylveon. Sylveon is the familial love Morgana feels for her brother.

Sylveon was cuddly and liked to help with Morgana’s healing projects. He kept the patients calm.

Sylveon’s moveset is Moonblast, Hyper Beam, Light Screen and Draining Kiss.

Extra, none team Pokémon

I mentioned Darkrai already.

Banette was playing in the library and they found a book that taught Morgana how to conjure Darkrai. Darkrai help Morgana during war, keeping people up with nightmares. Though she does like to use Darkrai on people she doesn’t like coughGuineverecough, not just war enemies. (Guinevere has a Cresselia protecting her (I know that Dark is strong against Psychic, but Cresselia has fairy moves)). Darkrai and Morgana have a nice friendship.

As Morgana got older she started a Pokéresort or a Proto-Pokécenter in Avalon. She found it with Isolde (the younger, why can’t these two be friends? They are both magical smart women and healers) and Nimue. Anyway, Morgana had a Chansey there that helped with the healing of the Pokémon. Chansey was in charge when the women are gone. When everything was done and Arthur and everyone died, Morgana toke the Pokémon and protectd them in Avalon. She also enchanted the apples to be healing apples.

@cukibola for the Darkrai and the Chansey ideas.

Previous: Uthyr

Next: Gawain

#i’m actually a few hours early on this one #morgan le fay #morgana #arthuriana #pokemonxbritish legends #only delphox and sylveon are male #lol #pokemon #arthurian legend

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janethepegasus · 6 years

Text

BMC Miraculous Ladybug AU RP Thing: RPG

An RP me and @pika-ace did relating to the BMC Miraculous Ladybug AU, where our main seven go through an RPG world thanks to an akuma named Queen Alexia.

(The main seven enter an empty warehouse, looking around for the Akuma) Leo: Okay, that weird queen lady has GOT to be here somewhere! (They look around until Owl spots a TV with an NES sitting on a box)

Owl: What's this? Hound: Ooooh retro!

(They approach the TV and it turned on by itself)

Leo: Ooooh. :o

(It showed static at first, but then it showed a title screen for an RPG game called "Miraculous Quest")

Swan: A game? Hound: I like the sound of this already :3c

(Suddenly, two hands emerge out of the screen and grabs the main seven)

Dasher: AHH!! Leo: Holy shit we're being Jumanji'd!!!

(The hands dragged them and into the TV) (Then there was a bright flash of light) (A couple of seconds later, the main seven, who are now their normal selves, stir) Jeremy: Owwww.....

Michael: Aw man...ow... Eric: *winces* Everyone alright?

Post: Yeah...!

Jordan: Shit...we changed back...? Why?

???: Because you're in my RPG game of course! :3

(They all look up to see the akuma, standing on a large rock over them)

Queen Alexia: And you seven are gonna go through the WHOLE thing! From beginning to end! >:3

Jeremy: Holy shit, we actually WERE Jumanji'd!

Queen Alexia: Well, not “Jumanji’d” but rather....you all became an RPG class! (They look over themselves and saw that Jeremy is a Fighter, Michael is an Archer, Eric is a Mage, Jordan is a Knight, Post is a healer, Lin is a Rouge/Thief, and Joe is a Mage)

Michael: ...I am strangely excited about this 8)c

Jeremy: Me too! 8)c

Jordan: *looks at his armor* I don't think we covered this during our game nights...

Post: I-I'm a healer...? M-Makes sense... :/

Joe: *to Eric* It seems you and I are...spell casters?

Eric: *to Joe* Seems like it...

Lin: I'm digging this hood and the black...I feel very edgy

Michael: But don't get TOO edgy Lin! X3c Queen Alexia: AAAAANYWAY, now that you all saw that you're in your RPG classes, let me explain a few rules...

Jeremy: Oh, I am READY for this! :D Michael: Same; I am ON BOARD!

Queen Alexia: First off, your Miraculous, they're not taken, yet, but you cannot use them at a lower level, you have to unlock the ability at a certain level! Wanna take a few guesses on what Level you unlock it? :3c

Post: uhh...10?

Queen Alexia: Nope! 35! :3c

Michael: WHAT?! D:< Jeremy: That's BS! >:(

Queen Alexia: Hey! I can't have rookie players in my game gain access to a powerful ability from the start! It would make things too easy! >:(

(Jeremy and Michael groan)

Queen Alexia: Second, you all have three lives! If you run out of HP, you loose a life! But if you loose all three lives, then you'll die both in game and in real life! >:)

(Everyone tenses) Post: Oh god...we've been sword art online'd too?!

Queen Alexia: Well not quite but, it'll seem that way if you loose your last life! ;)

Lin: In hindsight, we kinda asked for this when we asked Raven Claw to up his game...

Joe: Yes, now we ALL have to pay the price...

Queen Alexia: Also, all of you start at Level 1! So if you wanna beat the final boss, you gotta farm those EXP from battles! >:3

Michael: Oh, lovely >:(

Queen Alexia: Good luck! >:3 *disappears*

Jeremy: Welp, looks like we get to live the DnD cartoon

Post and Jordan: The what? :/c

Michael: The old cartoon based on Dungeons and Dragons.

Post: .....Never heard of it. :/c

Jeremy: We'll educate you later; right now, we better build up our EXP

Michael: Yeah! >:)

Eric: And how exactly do we do that? Jeremy: Beat the shit out of enemies of course!

Michael: Yeah! Beat em up and gain EXP! That's basically what makes an RPG.....an RPG!

Jordan: *looks completely lost* Uhhhh... Michael: You’ll get the hang of it

Joe: Well then, shall we start our quest? :)

Post: Y-Yeah! Jeremy: Onward!

(They begin their journey through the RPG land)

(Jeremy and Michael take the lead, being more experienced in RPGs)

(While the others are behind them) (After a couple of minutes, they encountered their first monster)

Jeremy: Ooooh boy, here we go!! Let's see what we can do!

(They get into position to fight)

Jordan: So how does this work exactly?! Michael: Just attack, like we usually do in the real world, dad, it's not hard!

Lin: Sooo....beat it up until it’s dead? :/c

Jeremy: Exactly!

Joe: Alright then, it may take some time to learn our new powers but we’ll manage!

Michael: I'll go first; my thing is pretty straight forward *gets his bow and arrows* Though I wish we took archery in gym class...

(He aims his arrow and releases it towards the monster)

(The arrow hits and the monster staggers a bit)

Michael: Woo! Did it on the first try! :D

Jeremy: Okay, I'll go next; I'm a fighter, soooo I guess I'll just punch him

(He approaches the monster and punches it)

(The monster staggers and Jeremy again and Jeremy leaps back to his position) Post: Heh, this is pretty easy! Jeremy: Well this IS a level one monster

Michael: Yeah, cause if we go into the later levels, they’ll get harder to beat!

Post: I'll go next but...I'm a Healer. Can I even attack?

Michael: Eeeeeehhhhh......kinda? :/

Jeremy: Give it a try, just...don't heal him

Post: O-Okay... (Post walks up to the monster and hits it with the stick end of his healing staff)

(The monster staggers again) Michael: There ya go!

Post: Yay! :D

Eric: Um, is there a reason this thing isn't fighting back? Jeremy: We all gotta take turns; once we all go, then he can go

Eric: .....Are you serious? -_-

Jeremy: Yep, that's how it works; be glad we're not in an MMO or else it'd be a free for all

Michael: Yeah!

Jordan: What the hell is an MMO?????! Michael: Later, dad, it's your turn, slash the monster or something!

Jordan: A-Alright then!

(Jordan gets out his sword and slashes at the monster)

(The monster staggers again, looking like it was gonna faint)

Jeremy: Almost there! Who's gonna take the finishing blow?

Joe: I will!

Joe: Now, if I'm a Mage then I suppose I can just... (He forms a spell in his hands and fires it at the monster)

(The monster falls and is defeated)

Michael: Woo! Victory!

Jeremy: Yeah!! :D

Post: So have we leveled up now? Michael: Oh, if only it were that easy

Post: Huh?

Jeremy: It takes a LOT of EXP to level up, and beating one monster isn't gonna be enough; we gotta beat up more.

Eric: .....Are you fucking serious? >:/

Michael: 'Fraid so, man.

(Eric sighs in annoyance)

Jeremy: Speaking of, we should probably look for GROUPS of monsters to fight to speed things up; Eric probably got barely any EXP since he didn't get to attack

Michael: Yeah, if we wanna best the final boss TOGETHER, we gotta be strong enough to both survive and win this thing!

Jordan: This is too much for my brain to handle...

Lin: You’ll get the hang of it eventually Tank! ;)

(They head on their way, fighting as many monsters as they can)

(They spent an hour or so fighting monsters and leveling up) (When they got to the entrance of a forest level, they were suddenly approached by a man in a long cloak) Magic Seller: Hello weary travelers!

Jeremy: Uh, hey

Magic Seller: Would you care to buy *quickly pulls out a potion* some of these??? :3c

Michael: *squints* What does it do?

Magic Seller: It makes you go fast *pause* Like Sonic the Bloody Hedgehog

Jeremy: Oh well in that case :D

(Jeremy takes the magic potion from the magic seller’s hands)

Eric: Are you sure about this? Michael: This is part of the game dude; you gotta get potions and junk

Jeremy: Yeah!

(They buy a few more potions)

Michael: Thanks for the potions man! :D Magic Seller: Ya welcome kid!

(They head on their way through the forest)

(They fought a few monsters as they went but all of the sudden, they felt the ground shake a little)

Jordan: What's that?!

(The shaking fades out and comes back, as if something big and heavy was coming towards them)

Jeremy: If Jurassic Park has taught us anything...that can't be a good sign...

(The stomping becomes louder and louder until a giant moving tree with large arms and a face comes into view)

Michael: Ooooh...goooood...

(The giant tree monster looks at them and roars loudly, then it starts charging towards them)

Joe: MOVE!!

(They run as fast as they can to get away from the tree monster)

(The monster chases them for a while, until it reaches out with one of its branches and grabs Eric)

Jordan: PEACH!!

(Everyone skids to a halt; Eric struggles and tries hitting it with magic, but they barely do anything, and the monster keeps his tight grip on him)

(Eric screams in pain as the monster tightens his hold on him)

(The monster roars and starts stomping away with Eric) Jeremy: Get back here, Treebeard!!

(They chase after the tree monster)

Post: Why aren't we doing the usual thing where it stays still and fights us?! Michael: This must be a cutscene or something!!

Jordan: A What?!

Jeremy: You know, like when those video scenes play in other games to move the story!

Jordan: *blinks* Oh, right.

Michael: Yeah; this must be a boss if he's getting a cutscene!

Lin: Then let’s follow him and beat that guy! >:)

Jordan: No need to tell me twice! >:(

(They chase after the monster)

(They eventually reach a forest clearing; the monster is waiting, and Eric is dangling from another tree, tied up with tree roots)

Jordan: Will!

Eric: Jordan!

(The monster roars at the six, getting ready for battle)

Post: Okay, NOW it's doing the thing.. Michael: Be careful, this is a boss, he's gonna be tough!

Jeremy: Yeah!

(They start fighting)

janethepegasus (They gave it all they got on their turn, while they try to dodge the monster’s attacks on its turn. This goes on for a couple of rounds) (Eventually, they were still holding on but Jordan had it rough, he was just a couple HP points away from losing his first life)

Eric: Jordan! Jeremy: Post, can you heal him on your next turn? Post: I....I don't have enough magic!!

Jeremy: Crap! He’s gonna loose his first life if he gets hit!

Michael: I...I guess we just hope the monster decides to hit one of us instead

Jeremy: I hope...

(They finish their turns and the monster takes its turn to attack)

(It raises its large arms and slams them down at Jordan)

Eric: NO!!!!

(It lands and the monster picks up Jordan, and then it throws him straight into the ground) (When Jordan landed, he looked like a bloody mess)

Eric: *struggling while tearing up* JORDAN!!! Michael: Holy fuck...!

(The monster finishes it’s turn and now it was their turn to attack)

Eric: *nearly crying* No...no, Jordan...! Joe: *angrily* You BASTARD!! (They take their turns, hitting the monster with their strongest attacks)

(Once their attacks hit on their turn, they managed to defeat the tree monster)

(The roots around Eric disappear and he falls to the ground, and everyone looks at Jordan's remains)

Jeremy: Holy fuck... (Eric manages to get up and race towards Jordan)

(Eric kneels next to him, tears falling and his hands shaking) Eric: Oh god...Jordan...no...please, please no...!

(Eric bursts into tears as he’s next to Jordan)

(Everyone else tears up at the sight, when Jordan's body starts to disappear)

Eric: *sobbing* No..! No no no no, please...Jordan...DON’T LEAVE ME!!!

(Jordan's body vanishes and a spotlight shines down from the sky; a few seconds later, Jordan is literally dropped right back into the world, falling on his face) Everyone: HUH?! Jordan: OW! FUCK, that hurt!!

Eric: *looks up* Jordan?!

(Jordan gets onto all fours and looks around at the scene) Jordan: Huh? Did we win?

Jeremy: Uhh....yeah we did.

Jordan: Oh... *sees everyone looking shocked* Uh, did I miss something? Eric: JORDAN!! *runs over and just about tackles him, tears running down his face*

Jordan: Woah! You okay there Peach?

Eric: You're alive...oh thank GOD you're alive!!

Jordan: Wh-What?? D-Did....Did I die?!

Michael: Y-Yeah...that tree just about made fertilizer out of you... Eric: I thought I'd lost you, I...god I was so scared, Jordan...!

Jordan: Oh Will.... *hugs Eric*

Post: But, how did you...oh...right...I forgot...

Lin: Oh yeah, the lifes thing....riiiiiight...

Michael: Wow...guess the adrenaline made us forget...

Jeremy: Yeah....

Joe: So that means Jordan has two lives left; now I see that we have to save as many as possible; three lives isn't a lot

Jeremy: Yeah, cause if we lost all three, we’re dead, like....for real.

Michael: And that was only the first boss...oh boy...

Post: Yeah...

(Eric and Jordan stand up, Eric still clinging to Jordan)

Jordan: You gonna be okay Peach...?

Eric: I...I think so...

Jordan: *wipes Eric's tears* Good...

Eric: Just...stay alive...please...

Jordan: I will, promise...

(Jordan kisses him on the forehead)

(Eric smiles)

Joe: Well then...shall we continue? Lin: Yeah, let's get out of this place...

(They walk forward and continue on their journey)

(They travel through many levels, slowly getting stronger as they go, but still having quite a few close calls as the fights get tougher)

(During one fight against a tough monster, Joe and Lin were trying their best not to get hit again, as they didn't want to loose their remaining HP with one hit)

Michael: Get ready!! (The monster roars and attacks Joe, and he falls down dead)

Everyone: JOE!!!!

Jordan: DAMMIT!! (They take their turns and attack as hard as they can, trying to end the fight quickly)

(As soon as the monster disappears, everyone rushes over to Joe)

Post: Dad!! Oh god dad, no!

Eric: Joe.....

(Joe's body disappears and he's then dropped back into the world)

(He falls on his back)

(Joe slowly gets up and looks around) Joe: Well, that was a bizarre experience... Post: DAD!

(Post hugs Joe tightly)

Lin: Well we made it THIS far without anyone losing a life; I'd call that progress

Jeremy: Yeah; hopefully we reach the final boss pretty soon...

Michael: What level are we on now? I think I've kinda been losing track, I think we're...in the twenties?

Joe: I believe so...

Eric: I guess we'll just have to keep going until the akuma tells us to stop

Jeremy: Yeah, pretty much.

(They get up and keep on going)

(They kept on going, fighting a lot of monsters as they went, getting stronger and managing to keep their lives. Until finally, the main seven reached Level 35, where they unlocked the ability to use their Miraculous)

Eric: FINALLY!!

Jeremy: Yeah! It took us a couple of hours just to get there!

Michael: Oh this'll make fighting WAY more fun! >:3

Lin: Hell yeah! >:3

Post: Onward! To the next fight! >:3

(They move on forward)

(They keep climbing the levels, their Miraculous abilities helping immensely in fights)

(Eventually, after many battles against monsters and bosses, they finally reached the final level, standing in front of the gates of a large castle)

Jordan: Oh thank god it's almost over... Eric: How are we doing on lives?

Jordan, Joe, and Lin: Two Michael and Jeremy: We got three!

Jeremy: How about you, Post?

Post: Um....I-I-I....i got one left.... :(

Michael: Oh fuck... Jordan: And...Will? How about you?

Eric: Two.

Jeremy: Okay...okay, so we just gotta watch Post's health more than anything

Michael: We don't wanna loose our precious baby! XS

Post: 'M not a baby... >:(

Jeremy: You are in our eyes! Michael: You precious cinnamon roll!

Joe: They're not wrong, son ;)

Post: T-True...

Jordan: Welp...let's go de-throne this Queen

Michael: Hell yeah, let's do this!

(They enter the final level and start slowly working their way up)

(Eventually, they managed to make their way to the top, where Queen Alexia is sitting on her throne)

Alexia: You finally made it...and with your whole party! Impressive!

Jeremy: Yeah, it was hard, but we fucking made it!

Michael: And now we're taking you down!! Alexia: Figures, the ones will ALL their lives are the ones running the show; you two have CLEARLY played RPGs before

Jeremy: Well DUH! >:(

Michael: Also, dropping our rookie friends into this with semi-perma-death? Not cool, lady! >:(

Queen Alexia: It's an RPG, they should've known better! ;)

Jeremy: Not everyone's a fan of RPGs, lady!! Michael: And not everyone are gamers!! Some people don't even know what RPGs are!!

Queen Alexia: *scoffs* Whatever. Anyway, you get the face the final boss to this game, me! So get ready cause i won't hold anything back! >:)

(They get into position and the fight begins)

(Both sides gave it all they got, landing powerful attacks) (However, during Alexia's turn, she tries a powerful attack at Jordan) (It hits and he's knocked out)

Eric: JORDAN!! Jeremy: It's okay, he's still got a little health left and two lives!

(Jordan struggles to get up)

Michael: Post! Give her a status spell! Stun her so we can get some extra hits in!

Post: O-Okay!

(Post hits Alexia with a stunning spell and she can't move for two turns)

Jeremy: Alright! Now we can get our extra hit! >:)

Jeremy: Don't hit her with the ultra big ones yet, we gotta save magic energy!

Eric: Right!

(They all hit her with decently powerful attacks and get a good chunk of her health down to almost red)

Michael: Almost there!

Jeremy: Alright, Post, you heal the party including yourself in case this somehow goes wrong! Michael: Everyone else, time for the big guns!

Lin: Hell yeah, let's do this! >:)

(They all use their Miraculous abilities and use their biggest spells and Alexia's health drops to zero)

All: YEAH!!!

(Alexia falls over and their levels skyrocket due to all the EXP) Michael: Ahhh that's the best feeling in the world! X3c

Jeremy: Hell yeah it does! X3c

(Eric walks up to Alexia's fallen form and gets her akuma) Eric: That was QUITE the payoff, I must say

Jordan: Yeah, it was rough going through the whole thing, but we did it!

Joe: That was a VERY satisfying journey...and I think we owe it all to you, Jeremy and Michael. Without your leadership and expertise...I don't think any of us would have made it out

Post: Yeah... Lin: Thanks for your knowledge of the genre Mikey! <3

Jordan: I didn't think you had in ya; you two may not know it, but you're born leaders

(Jeremy and Michael blush) Jeremy: Thanks guys

Michael: Never thought we'd be leading the victory charge through a giant RPG

Jeremy: Me neither. Yet here we are.

Eric: Perhaps during our next game night...we could play more RPGs, just without the threat of dying

Joe: Yes, i'm a bit interested in seeing more RPG worlds and see what they have in store for all of us.

Post: And working together like that was a lot of fun!

Lin: It was! <3

Jeremy: Hell yeah, that'd be awesome! Michael: It's a deal!

Jeremy: Next game night, more RPGs! <3

Michael: Yeah! Now let's get the hell out of here!

Eric: Right!

(Eric breaks the akuma and purifies it, and they're back in the warehouse)

Post: We're back! :D

Joe: Thank goodness

Michael: Yeah...

Jeremy: C'mon Michael; let's go home and try to narrow down which RPG we'll play first at the next game night! :Dc

Michael: Yeah! We gotta pick a GOOD one to play! :Dc

Eric: We're looking forward to it :)

Jeremy: Great! <3

#bmc miraculous ladybug au #bmc au #squip #jeremy heere #michael mell #Jordan Ellis #joe iconis #post the Squip #lin manuel miranda #rpg

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thetradeway · 3 years

Text

Session 37: 20 Mar 2021: “I WILL re-skunk, I’m warning you now.”

This is the third attempt to write out this entry on Tumblr; if it doesn’t go well I’ll try again tomorrow.

Mina still isn’t feeling well, but she’s finished the Final Fantasy 7 Remake, and is halfway through the original. Ed messages to say he’ll be a bit late. Mina is very disappointed not to have a dwarf to squabble with, but he might be out bottle-feeding baby lambs so we’ll forgive him.

Matthew is having secret conversations and gets told off for chortling into his phone. He mentions poems, and I immediately groan. Then someone mentions safe words for some reason and it’s all downhill from there.

Batman, it turns out, is a fascist. No, a fetishist, on account of the leather. A furry? He does dress up as a manimal...

So… Shall we play some D&D?

Joe tells us that Roll20 is bringing out a phone app, so we can edit our character sheets on our phones. It’s in beta at the moment. Woohoo! Sophie and Matthew have given Joe Dungeon of the Mad Monk, so he can send us all into dungeons now and get us killed. Yay!

Joe has been rolling things in the chat, and Sophie correctly identifies that a ‘success’ for him is not necessarily a success for us. Gulp.

Right - a flesh ripper, then…? We were to go into a sewer and give it what for. Tally ho, then.

Brother Charity wants a word with Shanks before we go in. He asks if she knows Mirt the Merciless, or Lord Walrus.

Shanks advises against referring to him as Lord Walrus. She knows of him, but isn’t personally acquainted.

Is he a shoot-the-messenger type person, Charity wants to know? Well, he would go out of his way to make life miserable for a person.

Okay, what about a literal messenger?

He operates mostly within the law. He won’t shoot you with a crossbow, but he will make you wish he had.

Charity asks (making sure we’re not in earshot) if Shanks can forge him a document. What manner of document? He asks for a public works order, something that would gain him entry somewhere under false pretences.

It’s not her area, but she probably knows a guy.

He wants to get into somewhere specific: The Silken Sylph. Possibly with a fake work permit, pest control or something. Daytime access for two or three people. Discretion is key.

She says they can sort payment once we return from dealing with the flesh ripper, if we return. We can make perception checks to eavesdrop if we’re feeling nosy; Tarragon doesn’t. She’s just glad of a brief respite from the overwhelming romantic attention.

Ahleqs and Melaina overhear bits of Charity’s conversation - a few key words like “Silken Sylph” and “forge me some papers” but they have no idea of context. Charity asks if Shanks can get the letter into Mirt’s hands. She says she’s not a messenger - he should try asking someone in the Dagger.

Any further questions before we head out? Melaina asks if there are any supplies we will need; Shanks says we won’t be travelling that far. We are told to tread carefully once we get into the old sewers. These are part of the old elven city that stood here before Waterdeep. When we get there the architecture should give it away. We’ll be away from the threats of the main sewer (rival guilds etc), but we’ll be in uncharted territory. There may be diseases, Shanks warns us. We should prepare some spells.

(Ed joins us - hooray!)

Gideon joins some spells to his spell heap, and he’s ready. Tarragon rearranges some spells and makes up some of her Herbalism recipes, and we head out. (Popcorn continues his stay at the Dagger.)

Marching order? Gideon goes first, he’s comfortable underground. There’s a squabble with Kessler, and then she’s at the front.

Carl and Charity are at the front, now. Tarragon is at the back, so Charity drops back to join her. (“Oh no…”) Carl stays at the front. Gideon goes next to Carl. Kessler is navigating, are we all happy with that? General murmuring, but no-one objects so Kessler takes the map.

We have to pick a pace to travel at. If we go slow we will get advantage on Perception to spot threats, and enemies get a penalty to spot us. Go fast and the bonuses reverse. We decide to go at a medium pace, saving our sneakiness until we get closer.

We set out to find the access point into the older sewer system. The smell and noise levels become worse as we move, and we get a minus 4 to our Perception checks.

We remember that Charity stinks of skunk still; the DM makes us make CON saves. We all find the smell revolting but everyone copes with it except, ironically, Tarragon. She pukes, and gets Disadvantage on checks and saves.

We follow Kessler and manage to avoid confrontations with the denizens of the new sewer. Melaina spots a glyph - meaning ‘Danger’. It marks the area as a no-go. We hear water rushing, up ahead.

We can repeat our saves; most of us fail them. Tarragon, who passed this time in spite of the disadvantage: “I will not apologise.”

Charity, hilariously, rolls a nat 1.

We descend the ladder; Charity throws up down it.

(Duncan can’t see; Joe forgot to light his mouse for him.)

Charity, while resting his head on his forearm against the wall, informs us between retches that he’s taking care of the Mirt situation.

The architecture is prettier here, but it smells really gross. The source of the watery noise is a sewage pipe emptying into the main channel in this part of the sewer. There doesn’t seem to be any way out of this bit we’ve found ourselves in; but we could cross the channel via a plank of wood that has been laid across it. Perhaps once we’ve rounded the corner we’ll see a way out.

Melaina rolls a 13 Acrobatics check and makes it across. Gideon gets a Guidance from Tarragon and gets a 14 total, making it safely. Having successfully performed this unexpected feat of dexterity, he goes to a corner and bends over, putting his hands on his knees and having a little breathe for himself while he waits for the rest of us.

Tarragon skips across with a 22. Ahleqs is making his check at Disadvantage because he’s still puking from the skunk-and-sewer stink. He rolls a 5, but uses a sorcery point to re-roll it (“It can’t be worse, can it, he said out loud?”). He gets a 6. Well, that’s one better. He falls in the sewage, and rolls a 12 for his CON save, and uses another sorcery point to re-roll that, getting a 14. Not his day.

DM has some bad news; he has contracted (”Rona?”) Blinding Sickness. It will set in in an hour or so. Tarragon helps him out of the drink; Kessler casts Resistance on her in case she needs to make a save. Ahleqs makes a DEX check at advantage with her help, and like a slightly excretia-covered gazelle, he leaps up with a 20. He stands there dripping and crying for a moment, then throws up. Tarragon steps back.

Carl is up next. Can Charity give the Help action to assist? Ahleqs asks if he can use Mage Hand to give Carl a hand to hold to help him keep his balance; DM likes that so he allows it. Natural 20 for Carl, for a total of 19!

We’re all lined up on the other side, arms crossed, waiting for our favourite party member to have a go. Melaina wobbles the plank a bit with her toe. Charity Misty Steps across; we are all slightly disappointed.

There is a mound of filth and detritus in one corner in here; stuff we would rather not know what it is. Shanks retroactively tells us that there are pockets of gas down here that could be ignited, so we should think twice about slinging fire spells around.

Ahleqs: “Oh, you guys have come down here with the wrong sorcerer.”

There is a pause; to fill it, Charity announces that now would be a good time for another poem. He takes a piece of parchment out of his pocket.

“Ahem. I'll be your dream, I'll be your wish. I'll be your fantasy. I'll be your hope, I'll be your love. Be everything that you need. I'll love you more with every breath. Truly, madly, deeply do. I will be strong, I will be faithful. 'Cause I'm counting on a new beginning, a reason for living. A deeper meaning, yeah. “I wanna stand with you on a mountain...”

Sophie puts a picture of Matthew on the group chat reading the poem; Goose is in the front of the shot, staring at the camera with a deep stank eye. Goose: “why do we let him stay?”

Artist’s impression:

The tiles on the floor are slick with some horrible stuff oozing from the mound. We have to make DEX checks to get past it. Melaina rolls a nat 1, but manages to keep her head out of the horrible stuff.

(Ahleqs finds “some matter” in his ear.)

We take turns making DEX checks to get past the stuff; almost all of us fail. Kessler fails badly and will start showing signs of Blinding Sickness in about four hours.

An Otyugh, disturbed by us idiots and Melaina crashing around in its sewer, rises out of the mound and attaches a tentacle to Ahleqs. It slams him into Brother Carl - they both make their CON saves and take half damage, remaining un-stunned. It makes a bite at Ahleqs and hits; he makes another CON save - which he passes. He is not poisoned or more diseased, but he takes some more damage. Roll initiative!

Kessler puts herself between the Otyugh and us, and orders it to put down the coward. She fires her crossbow and hits twice. “Put it down, you don’t know where it’s been, but we do.”

We hear a wordless, telepathic message in our heads that if we had to put it into words, says “HUNGRY!” There’s not much meat on Ahleqs; Kessler says it should eat the dwarf instead.

Ahleqs Misty Steps out of the grapple. “Oh, it’s horrible and it’s all slippery and I hated it!”

He contemplates going back to the Dagger. At least Mirt didn’t have tentacles - that we know about. Charity reminds him that Mirt was a rogue and could probably stab him to death in one stab.

Ahleqs, miserably: “Everyone can do that!”

Melaina makes a hide attempt with a 21, shoots with a 23 and hits. Her damage is a nat 1, but that still adds up to an 18 somehow. (Tarragon takes a minute to think about how she should be more terrified of Melaina.)

The Otyugh flails some tentacles but only hits Brother Carl once. It grapples him and drags him towards itself and makes a bite at him, doing a lot of damage.

Gideon Enfeebles it with a Ray of Enfeeblement, neutering the threat! He rolls a 21 to hit it; now it can only deal half damage with STR based attacks. “Ha HA!” It can make a save at the end of each of its turns. He remains in cover for the rest of his turn.

Brother Carl takes a turn; he uses his Gauntlets of Helm to do punchin’. He does 7 punchin’.

We all hear the telepathic voice again; it repeats its message. “HUNGRY!”

This thing is very handsy. Tarragon tries a Thorn Whip, not wanting to get any closer, but misses. Brother Charity asks Ahleqs how he’s doing; “I’m looking pretty grim. This could be it for our hero.”

Charity pulls out a trick he hasn’t used yet, which requires a WIS check first (Melaina: “It was nice knowing you, Ahleqs”) and uses a Healer’s Kit to cast Cure Ahleqs at 2nd level. Then he casts something called Life Transference to transfer some of his own health to his companion.

Kessler decides to give it something else to chew on, punching it with her Thunder Gauntlets. She has to make a DEX save to avoid slipping on the floor, and just barely makes it. She electrocutes it in the face - “wa-POW!” Well, she tries but misses. “Well that is just fuckin’ typical.” The DM says that she sees it smile, even as it dangles Brother Carl over its open maw. She will give it indigestion, she warns it.

Ahleqs takes a good look at it and wishes he hadn’t. He then casts Shatter, with Careful Spell. DM: Is it Thunder damage? If so, not a problem. If electrical, it will hit Carl anyway. But no, it’s Thunder damage. It makes a DC14 CON save, which it passes with a 26.

Ahleqs: “This dungeon is a higher level than us.”

Melaina thinks the thing is eating Brother Charity for a moment; when she finds out it’s Carl she decides to try and save him. She casts Tasha’s Hideous Laughter, as it was communicating telepathically so she believes that its INT is higher than 4; she is correct. It must make a WIS save, which it passes. “Shit!”

The Otyugh attacks Kessler with a 17 and misses her - she bats the tentacle away. It slams Carl into her and they both make CON saves. She pirouettes out of the way with ease and Carl goes limp, and both only take 5 damage. It takes another bite at Carl. Its attack damage is halved from Gideon’s Enfeeblement, he reminds it. Phew! It makes a save against the spell and gets a 22, ending it. “Crap!”

It’s Gideon’s turn. He gives it a little Acid Splash, forcing a DEX save. It fails, taking 6 acid damage.

Brother Carl tries his Gauntlets of Helm again but misses.

Tarragon can’t see Brother Charity to give him a Healing Word. She could move forward but then she would be making DEX saves to stay upright. “Nah, I don’t care that much.”

Charity, wounded: “After all the poetry!”

“BECAUSE of the poetry.” (Matthew gets this in stereo as Sophie and I both say it at the same time.)

He misses with an Eldritch Blast, and Kessler misses her first Thunder Gauntlet attack but hits with the second. She moves away but slips over; she picks herself up.

Ahleqs: “This is a bit of a pickle, isn’t it.” He goes for an Eldritch Blast as well, hitting with a 17 and a natty 20. He rolls on the crit table and gets TRIPLE damage. oh yeah! The thing is bleeding now, and doesn’t look well.

Melaina will go back to plan A, and hides - at Disadvantage. Still gets a 23 though. She rolls with Sharpshooter for 15 to hit, and does 28 damage. It’s on its last legs, somehow still kicking.

Gideon, suddenly excited: “Perhaps Gideon will get the killing blow!”

We hear in our heads: “Give back, you leave??” Ah, so it will give us Carl back if we go away. It’s probably doing the city a service by eating all the garbage, maybe we should let it live?

Will it let us move forward, instead of retreating? It puts Carl down and goes back into its corner, pulling all its tentacles in towards itself. (Ed wants to know how we’re doing XP in this game; if we let it live, will we still get points for it? Yes, Joe assures him, if we lay aside our murder-hobo ways we won’t be penalised for it.)

Brother Charity asks if it would be so kind as to lift him across the horrible floor; he offers to give it some food. Gideon wants to make an Insight check in case these things are prone to trickery. It could just be saving us for later. He rolls a 21; it’s an aberration, but it’s not necessarily evil. It’s in fear of its life.

He goes over and puts a hand on it. “It’s afraid!”(Okay, Neil Patrick Harris.)

It lifts Charity across; he takes some food from Carl’s pack and throws it towards what he believes is its mouth. It accepts gratefully. We could have just offered it food and it would have let us pass, the DM tells us.

Gideon, leaning heavy on the sarcasm: “Well when it started gnawing on Carl, my first thought wasn’t to throw it a bun.”

The otyugh buries itself back into its pile and we move on.

We all make more CON saves; Gideon passes his third, and is temporarily resistant to the smell down here.

Kessler makes another navigation check, but rolls a 6. (We need Gunna for this really, but he’s off on a boat somewhere.) We wander around for a few hours, seemingly lost. During this time, Ahleqs starts to get splitting headaches, and his eyes start to turn a milky white. Charity makes a medicine check - and Prestidigitates himself to get rid of the skunk smell (an ability that he, by the way, has had this entire time.)

Charity rolls a 19 and surmises, correctly, that Ahleqs is suffering from Blinding Sickness, and starts expositing about his history and how he came across a farmer with this exact ailment while he was working as a scribe. Ahleqs is sick a little bit on his freshly-Prestidigitated shoe. “Just a little bit.”

Charity can cure him with the magics and the medicines. (Ahleqs, slowly, to the DM: “Do I trust him?”) Charity takes a little bottle out of his pouch, turns away from him, does a thing - and then jabs him in the neck with a hypodermic needle. But his blinding sickness is cured!

Oh yes, Charity is a trained battlefield medic, he informs us as he discards the needle. And then he vomits.

Would he like Ahleqs to stab him in the neck?

Kessler has been trying for a while now to find her bearings on the map, so those of us with fewer than 3 successes can roll CON saves again. Charity fails and is violently sick, but the rest of us are now temporarily resistant. Ahleqs offers his water skin to the Brother, as he must be dehydrated by now. Charity is sick into it. Ahleqs discards it.

“I didn’t want that any more anyway.”

Kessler finds a passageway - we hear water roaring in the distance. The passage opens up into a dome shaped room, 50 or 60 ft across. Two sewage rivers drop down into a whirlpool where it drains away. The only way through is via a rickety wooden walkway that spans one edge of the whirlpool between two of the passages. Gideon’s dwarven eyes think it doesn’t look very sturdy.

He has THE BEST idea. How long is the walkway? About 20 feet. He could use his special thing - oh, wait. Was it 20 feet? Yes, along the side of the room. This might take too long but he could turn it into something else, like stone but it would take - many minutes, Ed tells us. Kessler, in the lead, makes a DEX save - at advantage thanks to Gideon’s warning. She rolls an 11. (We might be about to find out what Plummeting Mode looks like on Kessler’s suit.)

The walkway collapses, but she just manages to step back away from it in time. How are we going to cross, the DM asks us? We hem and haw for a while, being somewhat short on grappling hooks or Flying spells.

We need an Immovable Rod for this really. Gideon suggests chucking people over in the Bag of Holding. He checks his Floating Disk spell again to see if he can control it and send it over with someone on top of it, but it seems not.

We’ve been down here for about seven hours now. Charity decides it’s time for another poem; we all groan.

“Ahem. Would you dance if I asked you to dance? Or would you run and never look back? Would you cry if you saw me crying? And would you save my soul tonight? Would you tremble if I touched your lips? Or would you laugh? Oh, please tell me this. Now would you die for the one you love? Oh hold me in your arms tonight. I can be your hero baby...”

Kessler interrupts to ask what to roll to jump across the gap. She gets a 17, but is hanging on by her fingers.

Tarragon: “I WILL re-skunk, I’m warning you now.”

18 to hit Brother Charity? He has half cover so he can add two to his AC, but it still hits. We’re being shot at by disgusting rat people! He takes 5 damage.

“Why you in sewer?” the rat men shout across the whirlpool.

Well, we’ve come to deal with the flesh... squisher? Splatter? Thing.

“What is flesh squisher?” they ask. Ahleqs explains, giving the details that Shanks gave us. He makes a 23 Persuasion check, and the rat mens’ leader nods.

“Big monster, deeper in.”

Gideon: “Yes, we have an appointment.”

“You kill big monster?”

Ahleqs, still not sure if these rats like the flesh ripper or not and taking a gamble: “Ye- yes!”

“Big monster terrifying, rips arms off. Kill it for sure?”

Ahleqs, holding out Simon: “I can make a mouse glow, and that’s the least of my talents.”

“You no hurt rat men?”

“As long as you don’t hurt us. Hear that, Charity? They’ll be our friends if no more poems.”

“Yes, no more poems, rat people no hurt.”

Gideon: “How do we get through here?”

“Climb walls. You need help?”

Ahleqs points to the whirlpool and asks what happens if we fall. The rat men shrug. Comforting.

This is the second time we haven’t murder-hobo’ed! The DM is proud of us. The rat men will leave, and come back with wood to fix the bridge for us. Aw!

“You sure you can kill big bad? Promise?” they ask as they fix the bridge. Well, if we can’t then we’ll be dead anyway, so we make the promise.

The rat men don’t seem any more enamoured of Charity’s poetry than we are. “No more poetry?”

Charity, miffed: “I spent hours on those poems.”

Melaina, disdainfully: “A waste of your time and ours.” (Matthew specifically asks to have that recorded in the minutes.)

Charity pauses before crossing the bridge to ask the rat men to critique his poetry; they tell him it was terrible and made their ears bleed. “So it was more the content than the delivery, then.”

(Ed does a huge burp, at least a 9.5/10. Matthew: God-DAMN! Duncan: Sounds like you need to chew your dinner again.)

Kessler is starting to feel the effects of the disease; her vision is starting to blur. The star-crossed lovers start squabbling again.

Charity sees that Kessler’s eyes are starting to go milky like Ahleqs’ did. He hands her a tincture from his pack and tells her “drink it, if you want.” He didn't roll good on his healer’s kit though so it fails. Tarragon casts Lesser Restoration and crows about being better at healing than the Cleric.

We are in a quiet part of the sewers; now would be a good time to rest, Kessler tells us, now that she is able to see the map again.

There is no rubbish but a lot of gore down here, we notice as we rest. Probably close to the Flesh Ripper’s lair then. Tarragon burns some of her Relaxing Bark, so anyone rolling hit dice can regain two of them. (Ahleqs asks if anyone has a tincture that can restore sorcery points; not so much.)

(Joe forgets to enable the mouse layer again, so we pause so he can ignite Simon and Ahleqs can see.)

We move on. Charity pulls out a piece of paper, considers it, crumples it and throws it in the canal (it’s water, not sewage, here). The rat men were the final straw, obviously. Tarragon, who is the only one behind him in the marching order, sees this and files it away without saying anything.

Something slimy and black slams into the wall next to Kessler’s head - it is some sort of pseudopod. Yuck.

Does 14 hit Brother Carl?

“14 hits Brother Carl like a motherfucker!” His vestments start to melt with the acid damage. Brother Charity shouts “CARL!”

Hanging form the ceiling are two dark patches of slime; one has hit Brother Carl and the other looks to be winding up for an attack as well. They are making a horrible schlorping noise that we can hear over the audio.

Ahleqs is up first. He hits one with Eldritch Blast for ten damage, and ducks down behind Melaina.

She can’t hide from them, so she just has a shoot. 15 hits, for 22 damage. Nice.

What does Charity want to do? His friend is poorly, so he does another Life Transference.

Tarragon runs forward and Healing Word’s Brother Carl, and holds a Thorn Whip until one of the black slimes gets within 30 feet of her.

Gideon does a Chill Touch and rolls a big number. Carl can probably reach one as the pipe we are in is circular, and it’s likely only about ten feet up the full 20foot height. He rolls badly, however, and misses.

Kessler hits one with a crossbow attack for 7 piercing; she reloads and fires again for ten. She goes to hide, but forgot to turn off the strobe lights on the front of her suit.

The slime (it is a Black Pudding) hits Carl with a 23 for 8 blud and 23 acid damage. His armour starts to melt; he gets a permanent, cumulative -1 to his AC. Is he dead? On the plus side, he doesn’t wear armour so there’s just a hole in his shirt. On the minus side that was all his hit points and he was using those to live. On Brother Charity’s turn he will shout out Carl’s name.

Gideon is attacked, but the Pudding misses so we’re back to Ahleqs. He shoots at the most damaged one with Eldritch Blast and hits twice for 13 total damage. “Killing it instantly?”

DM: “No, not at all, but it didn’t enjoy it if that makes you feel any better.”

Melaina shoots again and hits for 19 damage - how de do dis! It turns into mucus and flops down onto the floor.

Charitoir is up. He runs forward yelling Carl’s name and chugging a health potion as he goes. He casts a Little Bit of Making Carl Better, A Little Bit of Making Him Good, and gives him 14 of his own HP.

Tarragon wants to know if she knew that Charity was using his own health to heal Carl; she rolls a 5 on her Arcana check. Not so much, then. Still, she sees that Charity is pretty badly off now so she sighs and reluctantly casts Cure Wounds on him. He immediately drops to his knees in the water, tearing up with joy, and holds his arms out to her, whispering “Thank you!” She backs up five feet.

(Unbeknownst to him, or any of us for that matter, he only has three more hours left on the madness that caused him to think he’s fallen in love with her. This is going to be interesting, especially considering his ‘certain views’ on the smaller races, Matthew reminds us.)

Gideon pokes the remaining Pudding where he believes the beady little eye to be with Chill Touch for 13 damage. Nice.

Carl is up. He draws his mace and bashes it - a ten is a hit, somehow. That’s the good news. Yay, seven bludgeoning attack! The bad news is that he takes 4 acid damage, and his weapon starts to melt. It now does less damage, which is cumulative and permanent. Kessler can fix it. She thinks.

She shoots her crossbow and hits twice. Sweet. The Pudding shoots a tendril at Charity - 13 to hit? Matthew has a horrible feeling that’s right on the money… and it is. Just as Charity is reaching for Tarragon, it slaps his hand down. “No petting!”

Just for Ahleqs, Joe makes the Pudding do the horrible schlorping noise again. He quivers in terror. More Eldritch Blasts! 8 hits, luckily. 8 Force damage and it dies instantly…? (A coward, but an optimist.)

He can hide behind his friends still, so he doesn’t move.

Melaina shoots with a natty 20. “I will kill it with my bow.” She gets her sneak attack now as Carl is in melee with it. Crit table says max damage and she can roll the damage dice a third time. Her damage dice is a d8+4, and sneak attack max is 3d6, or 18. 12 plus 18 and she can roll another d8, and add another ten for her Sharpshooter.

Joe doesn’t even bother adding the damage. She bloody well does kill it with her bow - how de do dis!

“It flies around the room like a balloon with a hole in it.”

We still hear the schlorping noise coming from somewhere deeper in - so it wasn’t coming from the Puddings. Hmm.

Joe calls it there for this week, congratulating us on not murderizing everything we saw today. We’re growing as people.

#dnd #thetradeway #campaign diary #emetophobia #this was a gross one lol

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