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sleepisaturn · 1 year

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warm mugs and warm hugs

Christmas fic ⛄

PAIRING—boyfriend!bucky barnes x gn!reader

SUMMARY—as Bucky's partner you absolutely can't allow it that he spends Christmas alone.

WARNINGS—hurt/comfort, sad Bucky, a pinch of angst but this is technically a fluffy fic

A/N—I know its way past Christmas but hey IM BACK BITCHES

A knock awoke Bucky who's in bed, well more like disturbed as he wasn't actually asleep. He tried but Bucky's an insomniac; who's only effective sleeping pill is you. He groaned as he rolled off his bed, landing on the soft but rough carpet under the wooden bed frame.

" I swear to God, it's the holidays, didn't that mean I get a few days where people don't disturb— " his annoyed murmurs was silenced by the view of the person on the other side of the door. The corners of his mouth turn upwards as he saw the person through the peephole. Half your face hidden by a scarf, a box of cookies on one hand and a thermos on the other that contained hot chocolate, held by cute green mittens that he gifted you a few days prior. Pride filled his chest as he sees the green mittens being out to use.

" doll ... you're supposed to be with you're family " Bucky's raspy deep voice called and sighs as he accepts your hug, a warm feeling dancing on his stomach as the smile on his face widens when you nuzzled your head on his chest. His arms wrapping tighter around your body as he finally feels at home, the cold atmosphere of his apartment warming up with just your presence.

" and I am " your small murmured voice replied as he pulled both your bodies near the kitchen whilst still in each other's embrace.

A comfortable silence fell as the two of you untangled from each other. Your hand immediately clasping itself with his as you looked at him with lots of love but a tint of sadness as you remember the reason you were here in the first place.

He sighed seeing the look on your eyes, mistaking it for pity but he knew you were just concerned but deep down he thinks just like everybody else, you just pity him and sometimes he's scared it's the actual reason that you're dating him.

Your body immediately followed Bucky's as he turned away from you, his head turning to yours as you use your palm to gently hold the side of his face. The growing beard slightly tickling your palms as you caressed his cheeks, a sad smile forming on your face as you notice his eyes that couldn't look at yours.

" hey, I'm not mad, I'm just ... it's the holidays, it's Christmas—it's an unspoken rule that you can't be alone for Christmas, baby "

He mirrors your hand, the back of his fingers slowly caressing the side of your face. He's still cautious about touching you even with his non metal arm because just like everything in his life, he thinks he'll ruin you—hurt you and even worse break you.

You knew that, you saw a lot of times how hesitant his touches was even in the middle of very intimate moments but you're patient. You knew being with him wasn't gonna be easy but you didn't hate him for that, not even a little bit. You never got tired proving Bucky that he could never hurt you and you never will. The love you have for Bucky is unconditional.

" remind me to beat bird brain's ass tomorrow " He replies with a little laugh.

" don't even, he tried to hide it but I spot liars even from a hundred miles away.

—you told me you'd be with Sam's family for Christmas because Steve's with Sharon, again I'm not mad ... why did you lie? did you hate the idea of meeting my family that much James? "

James, he's fucked he thinks; you only ever call him James in serious situations, when your angry or worse—dissapointed.

" No! of course not doll, I-I " He immediately cups your face on his large hands, your cheeks slightly getting squished together that made him chuckle as your glare intensified.

" Sorry doll—It's just I don't want to ruin your family's Christmas incase they don't like the fact you're dating me, no parent would be calm when their child is dating the world's most dangerous assassin " He laughs as your cute face felt irresistible, even if his own words degraded his being but he couldn't control his laugh as all he could see was your cute grumpy face with furrowed brows and cheeks that were still cupped by his large hand.

" ex-assasin, James—we've talked about this and my family would be scared at first but they wouldn't hate you "

" stop calling me James, doll "

" I'm dating you, they're gonna be protective, especially my mom but that's just because I brought home a boy " You ignored his words, taking his hands off the sides of your face. You held both his hands in yours, with a tight grasp and a deep breath you look straight into his steel blue eyes.

" I love you, Bucky "

" and I love you too, you're too good for me " He said with love and sadness lacing his tone. Slightly tilting your head as you make a move to kiss Bucky. Smiling against the feeling of his soft lips with the roughness of his stubble. The two felt the warmth of each other as they explored each other's bodies a bit. You're hands wrapping around his neck while he grabs your waist with his hands.

As the two of you separated for a breather, you looked at each other's eyes full of love.

" doll, not gonna lie, I kinda want that hot chocolate now " you chuckle slightly and pecking his lips once more.

The both of your spent two hours just talking about random things while you sat on the counter and Bucky stands in-between your legs. The two of you holding warm mugs filled with hot chocolate that had little marshmallows floating on the top. Bucky could stay right here forever.

But the two of you find yourselves minutes later on the top of the rooftop of the building his unit was at, laying flat on your backs on the room's roof that was built on the top floor, so that the two of you would be closer to the stars. Your fingers pointed out one of the constellations you knew, the bright lights of the moon and stars reflecting on your eyes because that's where Bucky was looking. You eyed the stars with amazement as Bucky looks at you with eyes filled with adoration. He loves you so much sometimes he questions why you're with a guy like him.

" I suggested we go here so we could look at the stars not so you could look at me, sergeant "

" not my fault you're a much better view doll "

" god you're such a romantic and they don't believe me when I say the great Bucky Barnes actually wrote me a poem once "

" to be fair it was a shit poem "

" it was the effort I liked "

" so you do admit it was a horrible piece of literature " He said chuckling as he moves his body closer to yours, using one of his elbow to support the top half of his body. His other hand immediately holding your hand that wasn't busy feeding yourself cookies.

" I love you "

" I know "

" I love you, doll, I am so in love with you and its scares me sometimes just how much I'm in love with you " he said while chuckling at the end as a big smile was painted on his face. His smile starts to falter seeing you have no reaction and your eyes that didn't meet his.

" I love you too " you whispered almost too quietly

" good, you kinda got me there so—uh so why the sad face? ... shit, was that too sudden? " He questioned, closing his eyes as he ran both hands through his hair

" I know we've only been dating for a year and well a couple months but— "

" no, uh nothings wrong "

" okay doll, that's pleasant to here " he humors making you slightly chuckle

You reached for his hand, locking your fingers with his as your finally look directly at his eyes

" I love you all the time. Every minute of every day and sometimes you pretty much the only reason I wake up in the morning, so I guess this is it, I love you and I don't ever wanna live without you James "

Your confession made Bucky feel like he was in heaven, like all the secrets of the world was bestowed upon him by Jesus. God, you were going to be the death of him and God does it scare him that your now his biggest weakness. He'd do absolutely anything for you, he'd die for you, he'd even kill for you if you asked.

" don't ever have to worry about me disappearing doll " He said with a straight face before immediately catching your lips, both his hands cupping your face gently.

" Merry Christmas, Baby " you said as he parts away his lips from yours while still cradling your face.

" I promise, you'll never have to celebrate Christmas alone, ever "

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