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lucycola · 3 years

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the long ass review none of yall wanted but are still getting

Ooooook.... Finally got a moment to read and review in peace. Seriously, it was like the universe did not want me reading this chapter. Always something coming up like "thou shall not read the smut". But God and the universe can pry this chapter out of my cold dead hands.

Op, you said that you weren't crazy about how it came out, and I get it. As a creator is difficult to completely be satisfied with your work sometimes. And imma let you finish, but if THIS is the result of you not being completely satisfied with your work, I fear crave to see what you're gonna make when achieving your final form the ultimate tribble. I had to go and reread the previous chapters before this one (I don't control the hyperfixation, ok? At this point I take everything that gives me serotonin and milk it for all it's worth).

Coming from the high of chapter 5, you would expect things to slow down immediately.... And they kind of do... But at the same time they don't at all. Yes there's no flesh eating monster trying to murder our faces, thank you very much, but what about the pining, the tension between our couple, the will they won't they. It's absolutely enthralling. I had to remember to relax because I was starting to bite my nails. If you think I'm making it all up, sorry, but I truly felt like that. It's just very well written and I got really hooked up, ok?

The aftermath of the crash and the loss of that many people is very well portrayed. There's gonna be a backlash to the one who survived and the effect of that one person is definitely well described. It doesn't have to be constantly present but something at the back of your mind, gnawing at it. Bones being this huge pillar of support and understanding, that's my jam. Totally here for it.

And then it starts. The back and forth, and the fact that yeah Spock is attentive towards her but it might just be due to the situation but he's still being sweet. I felt that bro, and despite having knowledge of how it might end, it still doesn't take away from the process and the tension of getting to that point. Which, tbh, I consider it a feat all on its own.

Stepping into a new environment and getting to meet new people is never truly described enough in my opinion (that's just my take, don't @ me fanfics writers), but I think you did it very well.

I couldn't hold back a squeal with Missus Spock, and I don't care how idiotic I sound when saying that sentence. I felt Scotty was a bit of an unexpected player. Usually in most of the fics it's Kirk and Bones doing the teasing (not that I dislike it, I live for that older brother energy), but it was quite refreshing seeing Scotty taking the lead and I can see no one better to come up with the title.

And how people would say it too!!

Up your alley definitely got me thinking of that line from BBC Sherlock "not my division". It's a lame joke but if it's stuck in MY head it's also gonna be stuck in YOURS.

There's a good balance between physical touch and her staying away because, lord, is being married to a touch telepath tricky as hell! (especially when sharing quarters with one)

UGH, the depth of character it’s so GOOD!

Due to being so used by media, amnesia can be turned into a bit cliché but you presented it well and didn’t use it as a crutch (which would have been fine, but I find your take much more interesting).

Trying not to be horny on main for this man is as likely for him not to sit slutty: it just can’t happen. Bitches be projecting so much onto your reader that they’re about to enter the astral plain. It’s me. I’m bitches. THAT’S MY DIVISION!!!

And the rest of you don’t get to judge me, we ALL clicked on this series because we’re thirsting after this guy.

On a more PG note, night terrors and possible PTSD are a good way to show her inner turmoil and THANK GOD you added the mention of treatment and talking to a mental health professional. So many fics go for the we never talk about our mental issues and we act like they are not there. You get my solid respect for that (among many other things).

Ok, I gotta admit that the scene with the lute was so heartwarming. I’m weak against a soft!vulcan boi, ok?

The love confession is so good, I could just melt :’). Sometimes it can be so hard (for me at least) to do it fluently and to not either slow down the tempo of the scene or over saturate it. You knocked it out of the park.

And then comes the smut….

Not to be thirsty but oh my fucking god. jesus fucking christ. holy fu cking shit.

Yeah, lets say that you definitely got me more than hot and bothered during that one. You just went ahead and grabbed like most of the greatest kinks and gave us an absolute masterpiece. Don’t know if you have written smut before, but I gotta tell you…you don’t have to worry at all.

And although I have no evidence of such thing, I got a feeling you used my drunken rambling against me when I said LET SPOCK SAY FUCK and was like ‘fine, let’s give them what they want’. if so, don’t know if to feel embarrassed or flattered

Oh god, he does dirty talk, battle is lost lads. Panties ended in like…Mordor at this point. It’s not something easy to do for his type of character, but you made I work perfectly

I do believe Kirk is never gonna look a Spock the same way after hearing what went down that night. xD

In order to finally round up my thoughts, pacing is well kept, and you manage to establish a good chemistry for our couple, the tension is absolutely sublime and the smut is just *cheff’s kiss*

I loved how the series turned out and you should be really proud of your work. I sure am and hope to keep reading your stuff in the future.

Fucking superb, you funky little tribble

ALL THE LOVE AND LIVE LONG AND PROSPER!!! :D

originally submitted by @lumar014

I legit cannot tell you how tickled I was reading this review. Much love, much love.

#the lone survivor #review #lumar014 #spock x reader #submission

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stevenuniversetanzanite · 4 years

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Fallen Angel (Venable X reader) Part 5

Michael's character might be inconsistent in this chapter if so I'll fix it later.

Also, don't hate me too much, I have a plan with this story.

Prequel Link: The Angel Among Us (Cordelia x reader) Plot: The event’s leading up to Y/N joining Michael and the Cooperative.

Summary/idea: Two strangers come to ‘save’ the occupants of outpost 3. Neither are what they seem.

Warnings: N/A

Parts: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 , Part 4, Part 5 (Will add as I go)

The two of you wound up tangled in her bed. No words shared just gentle touches of hands brushing over bare skin. A black nightgown discarded on the floor. You held her close, her head rested on your chest. Most would have thought it would have been the other way around, you wouldn't complain, you won the girl- at least for now. Venable was like a sour candy, bitter at first but once you get to understand her, sweet. You hoped the lolly wasn't expired.

Before you'd found yourself, you posed her a question, "What next?"

"We take our places for ourselves."

You had no clue what she had in mind. Was this the time to tell her there was nowhere else to go? The sanctuary is destroyed and everywhere else had been contaminated with radiation. This was the sanctuary.

You could take this woman away from here and leave Michael to have this fun with the other. You had no debt to him or his father. The reason you'd joined him was because you sought the truth. You had your answers, you only stuck with them because you never found the remaining witches before the bombs went off. The witches lived on- well at least two did. There was no place to take her, you'd been exiled from your former home and hell wouldn't go so well either nowadays. Anywhere on earth would be contaminated so she wouldn't be able to go outside without a hazmat suit. The former sanctuary could be revived, steal one of the apples you'd brought from the garden, but that would take time. She'd require food for which you can't supply.

"Sounds like fun," you attempted to sound happy, but the sadness came through. "You're probably still tired, I accidentally woke you."

"I could say the same."

"Yeah, sorry, again."

"No need to apologise, we both made a fool of ourselves today."

"I should let you get back to... bed" You shuffled towards the door.

"Where do you think you're going?" Venable asked.

"Bed?" Venable raised her brow. "The generator room."

"That won't do at all."

"It won't? Got a better idea in mind?" You smirked.

"One or two."

"Do tell." You crept closer to the woman until you were close enough where you were forced to look down at her. "Does this idea involve me in less clothing by any chance?"

"It could."

"Are you going to keep me wondering or are you going to tell me?" Venable stared at you not saying anything. "Ms Venable?" Venable gulped and fought against the urge to shrink down and into herself. "Mina?"

"Yes," she croaked out. "I... don't-" Oh god, was she going to admit this to you? It's so embarrassing. What were you going to think of her when she told you? You'd probably have been with a lot of people and yet you were her first. "I haven't- Um, had intercourse before-" or even a relationship if that's what you would even call this.

"Okay and?"

"Isn't that shocking to you?"

"Not really, I kind of guessed that would be the case," you answered. "You outlawed sex; red flag number one. You appear generally uncomfortable any time I pursue you or get close to. Your distaste for connecting to people or building an emotional connection and the fact that the act involves some form of connection whether it be a fling or long-term thing. Also your fear of people seeing your back would most likely stop you or at least you'd keep a shirt on. Need I go on?"

"Please don't"

"You also have to keep in mind that won't be the weirdest thing. You would be fucking the devil's sister."

"-And Michael's aunt. Oh god I forgot about that. I thought you two were a thing"

"Eww~"

"Only briefly. It was the first rational conclusion I came up with. It didn't help that in the beginning you didn't appear to do much, other than annoy the man."

"I think I'm going to be sick" you covered your mouth. Freezing then you had a lightbulb moment. "That's it. That's it!" Venable waited for you to continue. "We make them all sick."

The plan was simple to create an event based around some holiday, Halloween as an example and tell them that it was this weekend. The two of you would poison the supply of apples you and Michael brought with you with snake venom and feed it to the unsuspecting residents.

You'd put your plan in motion tomorrow, for tonight it was just you two. You wouldn't move an inch in fear that you'd lose her. Death followed you like the plague. Divinity doesn't come without it's consequences and yours was being unable to among the living for long. You pulled Venable closer, holding her tighter. She hummed, bemused by your actions.

"Y/n? Are you still awake?" Venable asked.

"Yeah," you mumbled.

Venable sat up, you frowned as she escaped your grip. She spun around to face you. A look of worry etched on her face. You scanned her face. You sat yourself up, pulling yourself out from underneath the redhead and gathered your clothes.

"Where are you going?"

"We need to by ourselves some time." You kept your head lowered as you dressed yourself. Venable made no attempt to stop you. A part of her forgot she was mobile enough to stall you.

"What's your plan? Think whatever you're going to do though first-"

"What I do is none of your concern," you snapped. She was taken aback. You fidgeted about as you gathered the last of your belongings. Your hands shook as you tied up your shoes. You thought about apologising, nothing came of that thought. "I'm going to see Michael-"

"No-"

"I'm buying us some time."

"H-how? What are you going to do?"

"No clue."

You closed the bedroom door behind you. Walking down the long hallway down with no plan. Your movements became less shaky. A tune played in your mind, you shut your eyes for a moment convincing yourself you were anywhere but in the last standing outpost on planet earth. The imaginary music blared, you could feel the buzz of the sub, the vibrations shaking the floor. In reality it was the power in the air from the few magic individuals. To be anywhere but here.

You loosened up, body slackened as you walked like a drunk man. For a moment you thought of hightailing it, there's probably a club in hell you could attend. No- chickening out wasn't an option. Unfortunately. You halt immediately, your eyes flung open, your nephew stood half a metre away.

"You seem to be having fun."

"I am, Mikey. Don't be a buzzkill," you responded in your usual ditzy way.

"You seem to be getting close to the outpost leader." No shit sherlock. You already knew that... right? God, I don't remember anymore. He should know, you made it blatantly obvious.

"Hmm. Want something?"

"I want your answer to my question"

"What question, you never asked one?"

"Whose side are you on?" That's right, you thought. It had been some time since you'd been 'blessed' by the man's presence. Since the checkup with Venable and you were forced against the wall and choked you'd stayed away from your nephew.

You leaned in close to the man and whispered, "my own." You straightened up and moved past him, brushing shoulders.

"We'll see how long that lasts."

"You will leave her alone or you'll face me. Got that?"

"Crystal clear."

You sat in the auditorium tuning a trumpet when Venable graced you with her presence.

"Beautiful," you mused. Venable caught what you had said and blushed deeply.

"Unlike your trumpet playing," she said. She sat down beside you resting her cane beside her. She was still using it to make Michael unaware of her being healed. She rested her hand on your knee. "What's with the trumpet?"

"It's the end times," you said, forgetting she wasn't as knowledgeable about the biblical telling of the end times.

"They don't correlate. I mean an instrument and the state of the world-"

"Not one for religion?"

"Not as much as you... clearly."

She assumed all it was bullshit that was until she'd met you. She didn't understand your rule in all this or if you had any relation to religion other than being the devil's sister. She'd have to do more research to come to her own conclusion.

"Wouldn't blame you. Most of it's bullshit written by men from minenila ago. I'll fill you in when we're out of here."

"The trumpet?"

"Oh yeah, sorry. An archangel is said to play it at the end of time."

"And you think that's you?"

"God no, but I like the instrument. I like it's my brother Michael-"

"I thought he was your nephew."

"Not that Michael. There's more than one."

"Not confusing at all."

"Human's do that too."

"I presume we got that from your kind."

"Don't know, maybe."

"How many brothers do you have?"

"Stupid question. That's like asking how many angels there are."

"Do you know the names of all of them?"

"Yeah."

"I'm not going to have to meet all of them, am I?"

"Don't want to have dinner with your future in-laws?" You said it as a joke but felt Venable tense up. "I was kidding V. You don't have to meet them-"

"It's not that. Do you see us two together-together in the future?" She didn't want to use the word 'married'.

"Yeah- unless you don't want that. I guess it would be hard seeing as I'm an angel and you're a human. It would be like a human dating the Doctor, mortals and immortals don't mix well even with my-"

"Doctor? Why couldn't a human date a doctor?"

"Not doctor....The Doctor. Doctor Who? BBC?" Venable looked confused. "God Mina, I'm forcing you to watch that later, I can't believe you haven't seen... oh wait your American, never mind. It wasn't important anyway." it also didn't help you've watched everything since the dawn of time. You'd say the same about any show.

"You're not american?"

"I'm not human, I can't be american... well animals can be American I guess- I'm not from earth so I can't be. I showed up somewhere in what's now Egypt when the land was still Pangea- at least I think it was Egypt."

"I keep forgetting how old you are."

"What can I say, those anti-aging creams work wonders." Venabe chuckled.

"Can you tell me a story from your past?"

All your stories ended the same. You alone, wandering the earth. A part of you assumed it was designed as punishment. All crumble away with time while you remain the same. Whomever you shared your life with will fade away too. The first human you befriended and the last. You left your imprint on the world as well as the people you associated with. What story to tell? One with a happy ending? if you could think of one. Your first interaction with a human, a similar looking woman to the one beside you, hair of fire, skin to pale for the beating sun of the desert you were both stranded in. You'd shown her a part of yourself you haven't shown anyone since. She left you in a bloody state, you left her worse. The kindness you showed her by healthing the damages she'd received by the dust storm (and other wounds) amped up until she'd beg you for death. That's what she deserved right? It took you eons to understand humans and every stowaway you had helped you more until you gave it all up for a taste of humanity, even if it was among witches.

Hours later, the two had retired back into Venable's room.

The selection where near completion. Michael was in his office going through his selections for the new world. He expected the company of the red-head soon. He had ordered one of the greys to fetch the woman as soon and have her come as soon as she was available.

She showed up half an hour later unamused. She addressed him by his last name as she did with everyone besides you.

"Ms Venbale, I'm glad you could make it."

"This better not be a waste of time, Mr Langdon, I was in the mix of some very important work."

Is that what she called you nowadays? Michael thought knowing just by looking at her she was with you prior to her arrival. "Then I won't keep you long. Please take a seat."

"I would rather not. If this is going to be as quick as you say it will be, I won't need to."

"Suit yourself."

"I've almost completed my selections."

"And?"

"I want you to join us... but only if you end things with Y/n."

"I will not"

"I only have one vacancy left... so it's you or her," Michael explained. "There can't be both of you. Keeping her around is a liability. It would be best if you get done with the breakup before Monday, I don't want any mess and we'll be expecting visitors." Visitors? Who the hell would be coming to the Outpost?

"And why do you think I would agree to this plan of yours?"

"She is not the woman you think she is, Ms Venable. There is more to her than either you or I can ever comprehend. As long as she is alive she is a threat. All you have to do is read any of the journals in the library and you'll see her for what she is. You may think she loves you but in a second she'd change tones. Especially by Monday night."

"What's Monday?"

"The guests will arrive."

"Who are these guests? Are they from the cooperative?" Venable asked, gripping the topper of her cane tightly. "How are they getting here?"

"No one you'd need to be concerned with... only Ms L/n's ex."

There was no way she could trust the man. He had been nothing but trouble since arrival. He had a point, she could ever truly know you. If you found out that your ex was still alive you'd go back . It was evident from the interactions from the beginning of your relationship that you weren't over her.

There was only one way to know about you, google you.

Venable never noticed it until now but she'd never the hum of the generator in the room next to the lab. You'd always been tinkering with it, but it's never made a sound. Is that regular? She'd never been in the room alone, either you were in there and you'd usher her out after a moment, or the door was locked.

She decided to test her luck today and tried the handle. The door glide open with ease. The room was pitch-black besides the glow of some sticker stuck on the back wall. You're doing, of course. She felt for the switch, once finding it flipping it. Nothing happened. Odd, she thought. She had her candle from when she was walking outside this section of the outpost. The auditorium lights didn't switch on either.

She made her way using her candlelight to the generator. It was off, rusted over and looked like it hadn't worked or been maintained in years. But you'd worked on it the other week. Something wasn't adding up. She tried to switch it on, hopping to hear a rubble but received nothing.

Venable sped to the computer room to test if there was any electricity in this place. The monitor light was on. She entered your name in the search bar. ERROR. She tried different variants of your name. ERROR. She slammed her fists into the desk, one hitting the keyboard. The screen blacked out. Crap. She cursed and tried to get something to appear. System reboot, the monitor said. The computer restarted itself. Venable's eyes were glued to the computer. Once the scene had light up, the language settings has shifted to default. They were the same ones she'd seen the first time when you set up the computer for her.

Blindly, she went back to the search engine. She typed out your name once more. The text entered shifted about, glitching in between the default language and another. The jumbled mess of letters appeared to spell out a place, Salem.

This was all bullshit, you must have done something to the computer along with the electricity, Venable thought. Jokingly she entered the name into the search, she got the typical (from what she could tell as it wasn't in English), the place, witch trials etc.

She scowled around some random sites until she heard a gasp from behind her.

"What are you doing?!" You snapped at her.

The red-head said nothing. She needed time to come up with an excuse. You tore her away from the computer, pushing the chair across the room and shut down the system.

"I was searching up about witches," she lied.

"No, you- you couldn't even read that-"

"What's the big deal Y/N? I wanted to know more about the stuff you talk about."

You clenched your fists, not bothering to turn around and look at the woman. "Get out."

"What?"

"GET OUT!" You spun around and roared at her. Sparks erupted out of the computer, leaving you unfazed.

You stared into her soul with your eyes fully dilated. Not just over the colour but the white of the eye. Your skin had paled down a couple shades giving you a ghastly appearance. Behind you, projected on to the wall was your silhouette, it mimicked you like a shadow but unlike you, it had wings.

Venable was stuck in place, trembling and not daring to look away for a second.

"Didn't you hear me missy?" you snarled. Her voice had a more demonic underlay. When she didn't respond you trudged up to her and pulled her up off the desk chair by her lapel of her blazer. She fought against her urge to quiver in your grip. "DON'T EVER use my technology to search me," the last part turned into a whisper.

You hadn't googled her and even if you had, she gave you permission when she first showed you the device. You had even suggested it. What had changed?

Venable grabbed you arm to try and push you away. Instant burning pain surged through her hand. She yelped and retracted her hand. You both immediately looked over to her hand. You dropped her instantly and backed away.

"I-I didn't mean to-" you stuttered out knowing your mistake instantly. Turning back to the monitor, you caught a glimpse of your ghastly reflection. "Please leave this room, you're not safe around me right now. I need to cool off."

Venable wanted to comfort you, but you made it clear not to and it was in her best interest not to aggravate you further.

You clenched your jaw, before smashing your fists into the mirror repeatedly.

She left you in that room to destroy whatever you saw fit. You were dangerous to be around, if she hadn't touched your icy skin who knows what would be of her. She hadn't searched you and yet you claimed she had. All she did was such up Salem, how was that connected to you other than witches? Where you there?

The skin that you'd touched began to deteriorate. The irritated skin bruised around the untouched areas as the rest turned to a nasty scablike wound. All in an hour, she'd found herself in the infirmary, wrapping the wound up with gauze.

"You screwed up, Y/n," Michael told you.

"I know that." Your body had yet to go back to normal no matter what you did to calm down. You teleported to Michael in hopes of his help and at worse a some snarky comments and 'I told you so's'.

"It's not so bad, now you can focus on the beginning of the world."

"Why am I here again? I got what I wanted out of this and I owe you nothing."

"You were bored and have nowhere to go."

"I could go back to heaven."

"As if they'd want you after the mess you've made."

"Hell."

"Do you want to go back there?"

"Not particular."

"Then where else would you go, besides I thought you were having fun. You enjoyed destroying the sanctuary-"

"That was my home long ago-"

"Didn't you enjoy watching it burn?"

"I want to see it burn again," you said. "Watch the waterfalls flow lava and the tree's goose blood instead of tree sap."

"Then do it. Nothing is stopping you from having your own hell on earth."

"But Mina-"

"Forget the woman Y/n, she's nothing to you. She's like all the others before her," Michael said. "You stole woman from there husbands and held them up in Eden, you were ruthless. Where has that woman gone?" He's gotten the story wrong, you didn't steal them, you saved them. "She's holding you back. Leave her and help bring a little more hell to earth."

"You're right. I'll do it," you said. He was pleased to hear that. "I'll do it this Sunday," a little less after that. "I need to... finish off Mina first."

"You can leave her to me-"

"You said to kill what 'it' wanted; I should be the one to do it." 'It' meaning the humanity in you.

"Don't take too long, the beginning of the new world can't wait any longer."

You and Venable made amends before the sunday. Both wary of the other but still going through with the previous plans of poisoning the members. Venable questioning whether to stick with you and go to the sanctuary with you or backstab you and go with Michael. You had to think about if you'd stay with Venable or find your own path void of her.

You hadn't gone back to your normal self. You decided to hide away from the others for the remainder of the week, only showing up on the Sunday night masquerade ball. Your outfit was an all black suit where the blazer with a train,paired with a black and gold belt you stole from Venable and your goldern devils mask.

The masks covered half your face, a black veil underneath to hide the rest of your discolouration skin. All skin was covered so you wouldn't harm anyone prematurely.

You stood above the music room looking down at all the unsuspecting survivors. Venable walked up behind you. You noticed she didn't have her cane with her.

"No cane?"

"No need to keep up appearances for the dead." You chuckled at her answer. "Soon it will just be us, we'll have the sanctuary all to ourselves."

"Yeah~" Venable noticed the uncertainty in your voice.

"What haven't you mentioned?"

"How do you now I haven't mentioned something?" You paused. "Oh, that's how." Your response gave you away.

"The sanctuary isn't real"

"What?"

"It was, but we destroyed it."

"Why? Y/N!" The woman took a step back.

"This is the last sustainable place left," you said not paying the woman to much mind. "We torched the place before we headed here. Those apples are from the oldest tree in existence. The one that caused the downfall of humankind."

"And we poisoned them."

"Yep."

"You killed humanity."

"You had no problem with it when you were told you were going to an outpost leader. You wanted to have a taste of power. Well you have and doesn't it taste good. The world is over. Humans are gone and you... well, you helped caused it." She was to blame as much as you were. "You'll be fine though. You got me and I'm not going to allow anything to happen to you." You smiled. "I'm going downstairs to keep up appearances. Can you get the two untainted apples? and then we can end this once and for all."

Venable nodded doing as asked. She headed to the kitchen to retereve the two apples. When she had her hands on them she paused. Michael was right, there was no snatuaray. The foundation for the two of you being there was destroyed. What was to make her believe that everything else you was saying was true too. You did have magic, there was no way you could fake what you did to her back, but the rest, how much of that was real? How about your feelings? Hers were but yours- if you were willing to lie to her, how could she know for sure?

With the wrong apple it would create a disaster.

Venable handed you an apple watching you remove your cover from your lower face, smile at her and take a bite of the apple. You gleam at her while chewing. "Well, aren't you going to eat?" Venable eyed you weirdly questioning if she gave you the right apple.

"I think we should save it, as a treat for victory."

"Well if that's the case then have some of mine."

"I couldn't possibly-"

"Oh, no, insist." You handed your apple over. "Unless you did something to mine." Venable stiffened. You covered your mouth and started coughing, dropping the apple on the ground. You hunched over, coughing with an earth shaking strength for your body.

"I can't be with you," Venable said.

"Why?" you croaked out. She doesn't respond. After a minute you straighten yourself up and dust yourself off. There was no hit of blood on you. "Oh, I know what you did. Might I say the poison gave it a nice taste." You stepped closer. "Who put you up to it? Michael?" The endearing look you used to give her faded away leaving a plain expression. You always wore emotion on your person, you looked vacant husk. It made you unpredictable. "You fool, he tricked you." You grew anctisy, "It's fine... I can work with this." You slipped off the gloves covering your hands and shoved them in your pockets. "Your just as dumb as he is, thinking that destroying the sanctuary was a good idea. He's still human, he too will be infected." You kept your undivided gaze with her. The inhuman part of your grew more evident by the second. The shadow from the computer room was back but this time had the same horns as your mask. "All humans will be dead. It's truly the end of time. I thought it would be different, God said it would be different. Guess he too couldn't give two craps about us. Hell if you read the old testament he was a bastard-" You rambled on, growing more irritated and manic by the moment.

Venable grew worried. She was frozen in place.

You retracted a blade from her sleeve and inched as close as you could.

"If I can't be with you then you don't serve a purpose." You shivved her. She grunted. You shushed her. "It's alright V, death ain't so bad." You eased her body to the ground, still clutching the knife in one of your hands. Once she was against the ground, you straddled her hips pushing the knife further into her. "All you had to do was pretend to like me and you would have been safe. I mean come on, how hard is it to do that? You humans can't make up your mind. You guys deserve to die." You added more pressure. You felt a presence at the door. Michael.

"Wasn't your toy to your liking?"

"Mickey, she didn't like me, what did I do wrong?" You ripped out the knife in one swift move. She cried out in pain.

"There will be plenty more for you in the new world."

"Your psychotic," Venable choked out.

"You're one to talk. You'll do well in hell, love. All those people you killed." You looked back to Michael. "Maybe I should go back to hell and look after this one?"

"But what about my partner in crime?"

"You got Mead."

"We'll find you, someone better, if not, she's not going anywhere." She wouldn't leave hell any time soon.

You stared down at Venable, watching the life drain from her eyes. "See you soon love." You leant down and placed a kiss on her forehead before her vision faded to black.

Don't worry there is at least one more chapter joining the two stories together. and it will have a happier ending. So don't worry that Venable was stabbed.

#wilhemina venable x reader #wilhelmina venable x reader #wilhelmina x reader

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bluejaysgonerogue · 4 years

Text

I’m Sorry PT.1- Stucky x reader

Hello Loves!! This is what i remember to be the first Poly!Fic i ever wrote, but i remember i wrote it around the time i started reading tumblr. Again, as of right now i am moving my works from Wattpad to Tumblr. I will not be editing them, as i would like to show my evolution as a writer. Thank you!

Pt.1 Pt.2 Pt.3

Category; Fluff, Domestic!avengers, Angst(!!!), Listen Before i Go(billie eilish, about suicide)

Rating; 16+

Let the Fiction Begin!

—

Ash wakes up, the soft light of the mid morning sun shining through the large full wall windows of her room. I open my eyes, stretching slightly, a yawn ripping through my body. I cough, remembering my cold as I search for my boyfriends.

I frown slightly as I see that both Steve and Bucky aren't in the bed with me, or in the room. I listen to see if the showers running, or if there's water splashing in the bathtub, but there's no sound. Just the recordings of bird in the rain that Friday always plays once I wake up.

I sigh, getting out of bed and opening the large dresser tony had made specifically for the three of us. I open one of Steve's drawers, grabbing his biggest and fluffiest grey wool sweater. I throw it on over the tank top I have on, grabbing a pair of short shorts from my drawer and sliding the soft denim up and putting on a black belt. I throw my hair up in a new messy bun, grabbing grey wool socks and combat boots from the walk in closet.

I turn around to see if Steve or Bucky has wandered back into the room, but it was still quiet. I grab my phone, slipping it into my pocket as I walk out of our room. I make my way through the maze of walls that makes up the Compound, trying to find the main communal area where I think Steve and Bucky will be.

I hear laughter drift into my ears, bright and happy. Thor's booming voice follows the laughs, cracking a joke I can't quite understand. I walk into the large room quietly, not looking around the room. I walk into the kitchen area, grabbing an extra large tea mug and an earl grey tea bag, dropping the encased leaves into the mug. I fill the kettle and put it on to boil, grabbing a glass of water. I reach for the antibiotics on the bottom shelf, taking out the needed pills and downing them all before draining the water.

“Yknow, you're supposed to take them one by one, right kid?" Sam jokes with me from the expansive island where the majority of the team is sitting. Tony is sitting on the couch, talking with Rhodey about something while Morgan watches BBC's Sherlock.

I give him a look. "Yknow, I don't need the water, right?"

"So what, you can take pills dry?" Wanda smirks slightly, easing an eyebrow in questioning.

"I can if I want to."

"Ah, what is the point in these 'pills', doctor banner?" Thor asks, somehow not knowing.

"Well, they can prevent sickness, supply nutrients, prevent pregnancy, subdue pain, a lot of things actually."

"And speaking of preventing pregnancy..." I mutter to myself, trying to reach for my birth control pills. I try to reach them before sighing, turning around to the team.

"Who put my pills on the top shelf?" I glare at them, mainly at Loki, Thor, Steve, and Bucky as they're the only ones who can reach up there. It's silent for a bit, Steve has already gotten the pills down for me. I grab my dose, downing it dry and looking at Sam mockingly.

"I did. O-on accident of course, but I did it." Bucky says, looking slightly nervous.

"Oh. Okay." I say nothing as I give Steve a kiss on the cheek. He grabs the whistling kettle and fills my tea mug. I thank him with another kiss before Clint and his big mouth speak up.

"Ew. PDA is NOT needed. Get a room, there's a pure innocent child present." Natasha slaps Clint (not lightly) on the bicep, worsening his laughter.

Everybody stares at him, natasha slipping a bunch of salt into his oatmeal when he's too busy falling on the floor to notice.

"Yknow, if I had a dime for every time I've seen you eyeing Ash and Wanda, I'd be richer thank Stark and his father combined." Bucky says, slipping his arms around me protectively as vision tightens his grip on Wanda.

"Oh please, I haven't done any such thing!" Clint, writhing on the floor, manages to get out between a few laughs. At this point, there's a mound of salt mixed into his oatmeal and milk. At first it was only Natasha, but now I've gotten out the big container of salt and started pouring it in the oatmeal, a red wispy encased salt shaker dropping salt into the milk.

"Christmas, last year. You were drunk and practically eye fucking our girlfriend. Same goes for wanda." Steve says, glaring at clint over the counter.

“There's a crap ton of tea here, is Friday getting all of it daddy?" An 8-year-old Morgan says, a small smile on her face.

"Damn I love this kid." I mutter under my breath, understanding her reference.

"Clint, get your ass in your seat before I call fury and tell him you were having fantasies last night about his favorite agent." Natasha threatens in that tone that tells you to get shit done. Clint scrambles into his stool, taking a bite of oatmeal.

The way his face scrunches up is priceless, and when he goes for the milk, probably thinking it would help with the bitterness, he spits it out. It would have hit me if Bucky hadn't turned his back and covered me.

"Oh hell no, that's my favorite sweater on Buck." I say as I set my tea down, taking a step towards Barton. "Five? Or just start."

"I'd say give em five. He's a slow old man anyways." Pietro smirks from the far end of the island.

"Barton." His head snaps up at me. "You have five seconds until I slam you into the ground and shatter your spine. I recommend you don't try the vents either seeing as Tony just installed some lasers to evade intruders." I say this all in a soft, slightly (aka VERY) psychotic tone. I let a sick smile play across my lips as I lean Over the table.

"One." I say, lunging for him. I push him into the ground, pinning him down with his arm behind his back on his stomach. I have his legs bent in a way so It'd hurt to move, his other arm held down by the hand with my boot. I press my knee into his back, smirking slightly at the exasperated sigh he lets out.

"Cmon kid- let me go." He pleads before I push down harder with my foot and knee making him whine in pain.

"Notice how no one is moving to defend you Barton." I say rather loudly. I push down on his arm more, getting another groan.

"Cmon kid. I didn't mean it." He is clearly distressed by the situation, looking rather embarrassed to have been pinned in such a position by an "untrained ten year old". He moves his head to look at natasha, pleading silently for help. She shakes her head, perfect eyebrow raised.

"She's right clint- Shes 22, way too young for you."

"Oh really? Last time I checked, Cap and Barnes are well over 103 Years old!" This earns him more foot and knee pressure as I twist his arm, closing to breakage.

“Be careful what you say about my boys Barton. It won't look pretty when I'm done with you if you keep insulting my princes like that." I say this, pushing down with my knee as I shift my weight ever so slightly to lean into his ear. He whines again. 'What a baby.'

Suddenly, there is a cold And warm hand under each of my elbows, picking me up off the agent and setting me down on the floor.

"Now now, little ужасный волк (dire wolf), his loneliness is enough to hurt him. He doesnt need his old man back breaking because he threatened us." Bucky holds my face, looking me in the eyes as Steve slinks his arms around my waist.

"Plus, we're physically younger than him." Steve says, his head resting in the crook of my neck.

"But it's funny to watch his egotistical snarkyness fade as his life flashed before his eyes." I Whine, my words, despite their content, sound like that of a spoiled 5 year old. Even though I'm trying to be sarcastic, I can still feel everyone's faces flinch a little.

"Baby we've talked about this, you don't let your false murderous intent cloud your actions." Bucky smiles slightly, Goin g along with my joke before picking me up out of Steve's arms and carrying me bridal style to our wing. Steve follows behind with my tea and two pieces of avocado toast in hand.

Bucky sets me down on the floor-inset couch, jumping over the back and landing next to me. Steve sets down my tea and hands me the plated food. He turns on the TV and opens our Spotify account. He plays the song that was playing at the party of Tony's we all met at.

I found myself dreaming

In silver and gold

Like a scene from a movie

That every broken heart knows

I take a bite of my toast as Bucky stands up, dancing with Steve.

We were walking on moonlight

And you pulled me close

Split second and you disappeared

And then I was all alone.

I smile as they sway back and forth, taking small steps as they lean on each other's shoulders. I smile, watching the two. They've always Been so photogenic, always posing the right way. I reach for my phone, snapping a quick picture before setting it down on the table.

I woke up in tears

You by my side

A breath is relief

And I realized

No, we're not promised tomorrow.

Steve grabs my hand, pulling me around the coffee table to dance with him, Bucky taking a picture with his own phone. Steve kisses the top of my head, pulling me closer by the waist.

So I'm gonna love you like I'm gonna lose you

And I'm gonna hold you like I'm saying goodbye

Wherever we're standing

I won't take you for granted

'Cause we'll never know when, when we'll run out of time

So I'm gonna love you like I'm gonna lose you

I'm gonna love you like I'm gonna lose you

Bucky takes me from Steve, moving around more with me. Steve snaps another picture before walking off to our small kitchen. Bucky and I move around the room gracefully, hands intertwined tightly together as we hum and sing along to the words. I start violently coughing again, Bucky pulling me close to his chest in a warm hug once I catch my breath.

In the blink of an eye

Just a whisper of smoke

You could lose everything

The truth is you never know

Steve takes me away from Bucky, picking me up and placing me back on the couch. Bucky drapes a blanket over me, handing me my tea which I gratefully sip.

So I'll kiss you longer baby

Any chance that I get

I'll make the most of the minutes

And love with no regrets

They both settle down beside me stuffing their bodies close to mine as they both kiss my cheeks before kissing each other above my head.

Let's take our time to say what we want

Here's what we got before it's all gone

'Cause no, we're not promised tomorrow

I pull out their dog tags on each of their necks, then looking at mine. They hug me tighter, each one nuzzling into their side of my neck.

So I'm gonna love you like I'm gonna lose you

I'm gonna hold you like I'm saying goodbye

Wherever we're standing

I won't take you for granted

'Cause we'll never know when, when we'll run out of time

So I'm gonna love you like I'm gonna lose you

I'm gonna love you like I'm gonna lose you

—time skip to infinity war—

"Steve? Ash?" Bucky says before dusting. I look down, only to see the same happen to me.

"Steve? Steve please I don't wanna-" darkness.

|—☆—|

I wake up, feeling a cold, hand, a familiar metal holding me close to a warm torso.

"B-Bucky!?" I claw at him, straddling him and pulling myself closer to his body.

"G-God, I thought I lost you, and Steve." He kisses my head before his breath catches in his throat. "Where's Steve?"

I look into his eyes, seeing the same feelings. Denial, fear, worry, love, anticipation.

"Come on! It has been five years we must go fight the battle!" A heavy Wakandan accent yells out at us. I give Bucky a quick kiss before tossing him another magazine. I run off towards where the crowd is heading, Bucky on my heels. We are let through the crowd, walking through the sparky portal.

I look around me to see rubble. Everywhere. There's a huge alien ship tearing Through the deep rusty red sky. There's no sign of Steve in the portal, or any of the others coming around.

Bucky nudges me, pointing out in front of us. I look out to see Thanos, in his large set of armor, and Steve facing him. Thor is splayed out on the ground, Loki next to him. Steve looks behind him, seeing me and Bucky approaching him with hundreds of people following.

“Oh my god I thought I lost you two." He smiles, looking at me and Bucky.

"I thought I lost you two..." I smile, looking at Steve's smudged up face.

"And I third that." Bucky says briefly. Steve turns around, tightening his broken shields strap with a sudden tug.

"AVENGERS!" He yells out, projecting to the whole area. He reaches his hand out, Mjolnir, of all things, comes flying at him. He catches the weapon, making a show out of it. "Assemble."

Thor yells, T'challa's voice soon joining as everyone changes against the horde of aliens.

|—☆—|

I see peter, shooting an alien that's about to come get him. He nods at me, getting picked up by Valkyrie and her Pegasus, the Iron Gauntlet in hand.

I look over to thanos, seeing Wanda talking to him. She hurls rock at him just before all hell breaks loose. Beams of energy race down towards the ground, trying to hit anything in sight. I dodge to the left, hiding under a large piece of rubble. Suddenly they stop pointing at us and aim for something in the sky. A large ball of orange light flies through the ship, one wing tearing off after the figure stops. The ship crash lands into the water, causing a large wave to come off of the lake. It starts up into a funnel as a sorcerer uses his magic to guide the water.

The ball of light lands in front of peter, getting the glove from him.

"I don't know how you're gonna get it through all that." I'm already behind Okoye as she answers.

"Don't worry-"

"She has help." I finish, the other women landing around me. Morgan in the light blue armor looking like her late mother. Wanda behind me, and I can hear Valkyries horse land. Us ladies start doing our badass walks towards the oncoming battalion, shifting into a run as the battle continues.

|—☆—|

I see tony lunging for the stones, thanos following in suit. I push back on thanos, giving tony the chance to get the gauntlet and transfer the stones before thanos pries it away from him.

The titan places the gauntlet on his hand, letting the adaptive size fit him. The other original six avengers, minus... Clint... gather around tony, me and Bucky joining as well.

"I am... inevitable." Thanos snaps, only for the gauntlet to make a clink noise. All of us avengers put our hands together and on tony, as he raises his right hand with the stones arranging themselves in his suit.

"And we are..." Bucky looks at me, then Steve, who gives a reassuring nod.

"The Avengers."

Tony snaps, and energy corses through me, pain mixed with desire and power. I walk over and rip the stones off of the suit, placing them in thor's cape.

We look around, the whole Army starts fading away. The world is suddenly filled with the dust of our enemies. Thanos slowly moves to sit down, turning to dust once he falls. Tony falls into the ground, an exasperated laugh leaving his mouth. We all follow suit and plop down next to each other, looking up at the catastrophic sky. I hold Bucky and Steve's hands in mine, letting them kiss me and then each other with smiles on our faces. We sit up and hug each other, happy to be together again.

"Thank god you two idiots are alive.. god, I don't know what I'd do without you two testosterone junkies." I joke, kissing each of them on the cheek as we all bask in the glory of victory.

—timeskip to after the battle, at the TOWER—

Bucky and Steve all sit on the couch, leaning on each other with such purpose. I sit back and look at them, seeing if they would be without me. 'Maybe that's better.'

I sit down on the couch, next to Natasha and the end instead of in-between the two. Bucky and Steve look at me, surpise on their features as I talk with Natasha about Clint.

"Remember that time when I pinned him on the ground and we all put salt in his food." I laugh briefly before staring at the floor, Grief on me and Natasha's features.

"Maybe... maybe it's better this way. Somebody had to die to get the stone, and that bastard actually chained me down..." she smiles, and chuckles, then frowns, reaching up to her neck to hold her arrow necklace.

"I'm sorry nat... I'm sorry you had to loose him." I rub her shoulder as a single tear drops onto her lap. "But at least he's with his family."

They had randomly come back in the middle of the battle and were quickly torn apart by thanos' goons. We hadn't noticed they were even there until well after the battle, about three days into cleanup. Damn, Natasha looked so sad looking at the kids and Laura. Morgan was sad that her friends were dead aswell, finally able to process such a thing at the age of 13.

|—☆—|

I've been distancing myself from Steve and Bucky for three and a half months now. I don't even know how I'm still alive. They have started sleeping on the couch, where I used to sleep, causing me to move into an extra room. I returned all of their sweaters and sweatshirts and T-shirt's and jackets that I had taken from them over the years, sneaking into their room and moving everything into their drawers. I took all my clothing out, moving it all into the room-my room. Everyone was happy when Tony has been cleared to use his arm again, as it had been damaged from the stones. But Steve and Bucky just sat there, eyes on me sipping a glass of wine as I laughed with Natasha.

"Wait, so you're telling me that if even one person hadn't been in the chain, Tony would've died?" I look at Bruce with disbelief, my mouth slightly ajar.

"You are correct."

"And if we hadn't been there at all, tony would have died in even less time than two hours?"

"Yes Ash, now please go uh... talk to someone else. I need to work." Bruce shoos me out of the lab, locking me out.

"Fine." I turn around, getting into the elevator and going to the top floor. I get onto the fire stairs and take them up to the roof, bringing out my laptop and sketchbook. I play some Billie eilish, sketching pictures of me, Steve, and Bucky. After a while I take myself out of the mix, creating more intimacy between the two enhanced men.

Take me to the rooftop

I wanna see the world when I stop breathing

Turning blue

Tell me love is endless

Don't be so pretentious

Leave me

Like you do.

—

songs; Like I’m Gonna Loose You (Megan Trainor, John Legend) listen before i go (Billie Eilish)

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drgrlfriend · 5 years

Text

Author Meme

Tagged by @ato-the-bean

Author Name:

dr.girlfriend or dr.g for short!

Fandoms You Write For:

X-Men (Rogan), BBC Sherlock (Johnlock), James Bond (00Q), Teen Wolf (Sterek), and Marvel (Winterhawk) with a little side-trip into Cabin Pressure once!

Where You Post:

FFN in the old twilight days, AO3 now

Most Popular Multi-Chapter Story:

Windows

“You’re blind,” Derek said flatly, the anger draining from him so suddenly he felt almost woozy. His vision cleared, his claws sliding back into blunt fingernails.

“Thanks for the memo, genius,” the kid said acidly. “I can still fucking defend myself, so don’t take another damn step.”

“Fuck, I...I’m sorry,” Derek stuttered.

“What?!” The kid’s brow crinkled. “I mean — what?! You’re fucking sorry!?” His lips thinned into a harsh line. “What, is this some kinda Hallmark movie where you’re discovering the error of your ways because you don’t want to rob a blind person?! That’s fucking condescending, man. I’ll have you know that —”

“Just, wait.” Derek interrupted what was apparently the start of a convincing argument as to why he should rob the kid after all, feeling his head start to spin. “This is — it’s a misunderstanding. I’m — I’m not robbing you. You’re — you’re safe, okay? I’m taking three steps back. Just — just let me explain.”

“Explain why you came busting into my apartment? Yeah, go right ahead, man, I can’t wait to hear this epic tale.”

Favourite Story You Wrote:

I think most of my epic-length stories are pretty much my babies, but I’m always most enthusiastic about the fandom I’m in currently, so if you asked me which of my stories I would recommend to someone at the moment it would be:

Lucky in Love

“I’m not some charity case,” Bucky says pugnaciously.

“I didn’t think you were,” Clint answers back readily enough. “I mean, I can tell you’re fucked up for sure, but of the two of us, I’m probably the bigger disaster. My sleep schedule is shit, and I drink coffee straight from the pot. I sing in the shower even though I’m deaf as fuck. I have arrows everywhere because I’m an archer — did I tell you that? And I was raised in a literal circus, so I’m not exactly domestic. Let’s see, what else?” He squints down at the ground, rubbing the back of his neck. “Oh, yeah, I won the building in a poker game with the Russian mafia and every once in awhile they show up and try to take it back, but usually I handle it, no problem. Uh...”

Clint happens to looks up and Bucky’s eyes are wide, his mouth hanging open. Clint’s hand freezes where he’s rubbing the back of his neck, suddenly embarrassed. Yeah, when you put it all out there at once, it doesn’t sound so good.

Story You Were Nervous to Post:

I’m Game (A Very Craigslist Thanksgiving)

"If you’d like to have me as your strictly platonic date for Thanksgiving, but have me pretend to be in a very long or serious relationship with you, to torment your family, I’m game," the ad had said. "I can do these things, at your request: openly hit on other guests while you act like you don't notice, start instigative discussions about politics and/or religion, propose to you in front of everyone, pretend to be really drunk as the evening goes on (sorry, I don't drink, but I used to. a lot. too much in fact. I know the drill), start an actual, physical fight with a family member, either inside or on the front lawn for all the neighbors to see. I require no pay but the free meal I will receive as a guest."

This was my first fic in the huge Sterek fandom, and I was especially nervous because I hadn’t watched much of the show yet -- just read a lot of fanfic!

How Do You Choose Your Titles:

I am the WORST at titles. I used to just call fics “The _____” based on whatever the most prominent feature of the story was. Some of my titles are ridiculous puns that people hate. :-) “Quriosity” was just the working title of my doc until I thought of something better, but it grew on me.

Do You Outline:

Not a huge amount in advance, but I outline as I go to keep track of what time of year it should be in the story and to remind myself of what has already happened, because otherwise I read the story from the beginning before I write the next part and that can become time-consuming.

Complete:

40 stories although one of them is a bunch of ficlets.

In-Progress:

In progress (and I better get cracking on it) is my last Fandom Trumps Hate auction with police dog!Derek and college student!Stiles.

Coming Soon/Not Yet Started:

I have a lot of Winterhawk ideas that I’m not allowed to write until I finish the FTH fic!

Do You Accept Prompts:

I don’t write a ton, so if you send me a prompt you’ll probably be disappointed. Most of my fics, though, were prompted by one thing or another. Either an idea in fanfic I wanted to go a different way, or a prompt list, or something like that.

Upcoming Story You Are Most Excited to Write:

Excited to write more Winterhawk since I’m currently obsessed with that fandom.

Tagged By:

@ato-the-bean

Tagging:

I tag @kangofu-cb, @pantstomatch, and @mojoflower (only if they want to!)

#random #fanfiction #authors #author memes

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farfromsugafanfic · 5 years

Text

Sammy Interview

Before we get started, do you mind introducing yourself and telling a bit about yourself?

My name is Sammy. I’m 34 years old, a college graduate with a background in cultural anthropology as well as women, gender, and sexuality studies. I’m particularly interested in queer and feminist methodologies. I live with my partner of some 15 years, who is also a fanfiction writer.

Q1: So, you told me that you’ve been writing fan fiction for 20+ years which is awesome! How did it all get started and what kind of fan fiction have you written in that time?

A1: Like a lot of fangirls of my generation, anime was my introduction to fanfiction. I grew up watching Sailor Moon when it first aired on American network television. It was love at first sight. There was nothing else like it on TV. At my local Blockbuster I discovered anime. It wasn’t as readily available then as it is now. Because the english dubs were so limited I ended up watching the same OVA rentals over and over - Ranma ½, RG Veda, Vampire Princess Miyu. First I wrote stories in my head, then I started writing them down. When I recieved my own computer and constant access to the internet, I went searching for fansites. Secreted behind unassuming links I found small clutches of fanfiction. This was before fanfiction.net first took off, and An Archive of Our Own was well over a decade away. Fansites had webrings, which took me to the next fansite, and so on. It really was a matter of finding the right webring for a given show and following the thread.

I began with writing Sailor Moon fanfiction, and as Cartoon Network’s late night block of programming (Toonami) expanded, the more I wrote. Gundam Wing fandom introduced me to shipping and it blew my mind.

I moved away from anime when the Harry Potter movies happened. A lot of us made the transition to book and movie based fandoms when someone discovered Harry/Draco. After that I found DC comics, and then became very active in the Star Trek reboot fandom. I’ve written for Stargate: Atlantis, BBC Sherlock and Hannibal and so, so many other shows/books/video games. I’ve been an active participant in Yuletide, which is an anonymous holiday fanfic exchange, and multiple Big Bangs -another fanfic/fanart exchange- as well as a kinkmeme prompt filler for years.

Q2: What pushed you to begin sharing your fan fiction?

A2: The mailing lists. In the early days of fandom private yahoo groups and message boards were the main venue for posting and reading fanfiction. Most mailing lists were fandom based and created for specific content - like Gundam Wing Slash, GundamWingGEN and CRACKSHIP. These became high volume, tight knit communities. It wasn’t unusual to have your mail box refreshing on the left side of the monitor, while you chatted with members on AIM on the right side. There was a lot of encouragement, experimentation, and collaboration. You posted your fanfiction to the list, or board, and people cheered. It was all so exciting. It’s hard to describe now how close we all were, and just how much fellow-feeling fueled hundreds of emails a day. This was my online family, my community. I didn’t need a push or moment of courage to post my early fanfiction - I was delighted to share, invited to share. It was an electrifying thing to be part of.

Q3: Were you scared to post it online?

A3: Not at all. I didn’t need to be scared - none of us did. No one outside these early lists and boards knew what we were doing. I really can’t emphasize enough how guarded the early fanfiction community was. We were incredibly insulated. Our families didn’t know, our teachers and co-workers were oblivious, popular culture wasn’t shitting on fanfiction writers because it didn’t know we were writing. I wasn’t scared to press ‘send’, but it did feel dangerous, a little rebellious. There was a sense of getting away with something.

Q4: Has writing fan fiction taught you anything? About writing? Reading? Something else?

A4: On a basic level, fanfiction taught me how to write. Structure, pace, dialogue - I was taught those things in a classroom, but I learned them by writing fanfiction. We all taught ourselves to write by writing for each other. We created an entire literary movement without an MA in literature, or a structured pedagogy. Fanfiction writers generated new narrative traditions, like the Five Things + 1 format (a breakaway from the three-act story), Hurt/Comfort, and a language of tagging that defies classical genre rules - all because we were messing around.

Writing fanfiction has taught me the value of questioning western literary rules and conventions, that writing for myself and my own pleasure is valid. It’s also taught me that I don’t like to write alone. One of the things that makes fanfiction so special for me is that so much of it happens in conversation with other writers and readers. My best writing experiences have been in simpatico with total strangers, on AIM, in livejournal comment threads, gchat. I’m not writing “original fiction” because I lack imagination; it’s just too lonely.

Q5: Do you ever want to be published in a professional capacity one day?

A5: I do, though I feel like this is a bit of a fraught subject for fanfiction writers. There’s an compulsion to say yes, of course I plan to publish one day, as if that end goal legitimates the fanfiction I write. I don’t want to contribute to the idea of fanfiction as a lesser form of literature- a stepping stone to Real Writing - but yes. I started writing creative nonfiction in community college. That writing comes from a very different place than fanfiction. It satisfies another hunger.

Q6: How you feel about the stigma surrounding fan fiction and fan fiction writers? Or, do you not feel any stigma at all?

A6: I think the stigma towards fanfiction is pushback from multiple sociological and institutional sources.

In the beginning we had the sense that fanfiction - slash fanfiction - wasn’t something to bring up outside of those digital spaces we made for ourselves. We knew it would be considered an auteur kink at best, or downright perverted plagiarism at worst (I think this is largely still the case). Before the community found the language to discuss slash and fanfiction as transformative works - as deconstructions of conventional media, gender roles, and sexuality - there was an ethos of compartmentalization to the whole thing.

Q7: Do you think that stigma is warranted? (Whether or not you have personally experience it?)

A7: No.

I touched on this earlier, but I believe the stigma and hostility towards fanfiction is firmly rooted in gender and non-normative sexuality. The writing we do is generally characterized as a feminine endeavour, which immediately marks it as inferior to a literary canon that values the masculine so highly. The perception that fanfiction is a plagiarism of male authored source material makes it all the more egregious.

Equally as foundational, is the reduction of fanfiction to gay porn written by straight cis women for straight cis women - fanfiction is not only shit writing, it’s perverted and weird.

I’ve never been ashamed of the fanfiction I write, or read. Embarrassed maybe, of those first earnest attempts at writing. But fanfiction does not have a monopoly on bad writing. I can just as easily find the same trash in Barnes & Noble. So, quality is not and never has been a valid criticism.

Q8: What’s your favorite piece of fan fiction you’ve ever written? Why?

A8: A gen fic I wrote for Star Trek (AOS). I’m a leisurely writer, and stories don’t just hit me whole and complete in one go. But this one did. It took three hours to write and I didn’t have to think about where I was going after finishing a paragraph, the next was already there, I just had to type it out. It’s never come that easy before or since. It’s not my most popular piece of fanfiction, but I can go back and read it and not feel like I need to change anything.

Q10: Do you write outside of fan fiction?

A10: I do - until recently I was writing up lesson plans for classes I was co-facilitating. Generally, when I’m not writing fanfiction I’m working on creative non-fiction. I use the frame of gender analysis and sexuality studies (among others) to write about my life.

Q11: What site do you prefer to write and post your fan fiction on?

A11: An Archive of Our Own (AO3). The tagging system is superior and the site is far more user friendly than ff.net, which is an absolute dumpster fire.

Q12: What’s something you want people outside the fan fiction community to know about the fan fiction community?

We’re not a monolith. Teenage girls are the cultural face of fanfiction, but so many of us are in our 30s and 40s, old fandom queens from those first private mailing lists, boards, and LiveJournal accounts. We have soul sucking jobs. We have degrees in STEM. We teach college, have kids and debt, and friendships that have lasted decades.. We are not, and never have been a homogenous group of straight cis women. Asexuality and gender fluidity abounds. Plenty of us experience disability and chronic illness. And we aren’t a small group of weirdos obsessed with Johnlock. We’re an enormous and diverse group of weirdos who have created a literary movement.

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skyhon · 7 years

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I just now started watching Elementary and while it has its moments where I go “haha dude chill” at Sherlock like.... it’s fucking refreshing as someone coming from BBC Sherlock. In BBC Sherlock, Sherlock’s faults are addressed for two seconds. Those two seconds are filled with him doing a shitty thing, someone being like “what the fuck?” and then that's it and everyone just??? Forgets about it I guess??? And he never apologies let alone even admits to anything hes done?? Meanwhile Sherlock in Elementary is like “hha yeah I was embarrassed that I couldn’t get that one witness to crack. I was an asshole and I'm sorry.” like???????? I literally had my god damned jaw on the floor dude!!! The fuck this guy doing, realizing his faults and shit????? I was so not prepared for that. And!!! Joan is so quick to point out his dumbass fuckery. Like yes!!! You go girl!!! Tell him he's being a douche!! She stops and redirects him when hes close to going too far. “go get some chips” was AN INSANE SCENE for me to watch. He gets the fucking chips???????????????? He literally does what she says THE MOMENT she says it. He stays out there and eats them and!!!!! He!!!!!! Listens to her!!!!!!!!!!!! And I'm only on the what, second episode and Joan literally looks at evidence and SOLVES A KEY ELEMENT IN THE CASE, by herself. John fucking Watson on the other hand?? Lol he yells at Sherlock for being an ass and then just ignores that he's an ass???? And does literally nothing and even when he's useful and independent he's not ACTUALLY because he NEEDS Sherlock and he's not an actual character without him blah blah blah. I am not used to this. Lord have FUCKING mercy I was not ready for this.... This.... Actually Okay Show. Like the fuck

#elementary #sherlock

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violyntfemme · 7 years

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rules:

1. always post the rules. 2. answer the questions given by the person who tagged you. 3. write 11 questions of your own and tag 11 (or however many) people to answer them.

I was tagged by @hisreindeerjumper (first set) and @futuredescending (second set) so I am answering two sets.

Sorry this took so long but I started it last night as the meds were kicking in and it quickly devolved into incoherency :)

1. what fandom have you been involved in that’s your favorite to date? Kingsman, hands down. Things are a little rough now and then lately, but I am hoping we find that live and let live attitude we all had less than six months ago, both before and after K2

2. what did you want to grow up to be when you were little? An archeologist, or a writer, or a fashion designer. I can’t draw and I hate chipped nails so really only one of those were going to work out for me.

3. favorite places to shop online? My Pretty Zombie cosmetics.

4. first kiss! tell me all about it! and i you haven’t been kissed yet, how do you want it to go down? do you want to be kissed at all? It was at my grandmother’s house. I was 13, he was 18. He played the guitar and I thought he was a god. It was horrible though. I mean I knew nothing about kissing and he, like a typical guy, thought that he had to inhale the lower portion of my face.

5. who was the first author that you read with a voracious hunger? Poppy Z. Brite. I still have my original, and falling apart, copies of Lost Souls and Drawing Blood, along with most of her (now his) books that have been released. I read and re-read them a million times.

6. what color looks best on you? Black. Always.

7. do you read your horoscope? If I come across it, but I do not seek it out.

8. what are you most proud of in your life? My published LGBT erotica. You think it would be becoming an attorney. Nope, it’s my porn that makes me proud.

9. favorite food & why! Milano Cookies, dark chocolate preferably. They are wonderful with a cup of tea. They remind me of staying up late with my mother watching old BBC shows.

10. what scent do you have the strongest memory association with? CK One. I can’t stand it now, but one sniff and I am back in 1995 instantly.

11. favorite tea flavor! Earl Grey, more specifically, Hooded Figures blend or a London Fog.

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1. What is the nicest thing someone has done for you? When we had a rare ice storm and it was super cold out, my husband got up while I was getting ready for work and turned on my car to warm it up and de-ice it. Then he took some small rugs, the kind you wipe your feet on, and placed them over the ice as a path so I could get to my car safely (since I use a cane). Inside the car was my coffee and lunch waiting for me. This is the kind of thing he does on the reg. I don’t know why the man stays with my salty and bitter ass.

2. Do you have NOTPs? If so, why are they NOTPs for you? In Kingsman, Roxy/Eggsy. I am not hating on the ships at all, they just don’t work for me because I can’t see any tension between the characters. Roxy and Eggsy are my number one BROTP though and any fic that can capture that relationship well has all my love. In Sherlock John/Mary/Sherlock or Sherlock/Mary. I cannot stand her. Well, I take that back. The Mary that lived in John’s head in the last two episodes, her I actually liked quite a bit.

3. Summarize the worst film/book/song/story you’ve ever read/watched? Girl gets cursed by an old woman because Girl denies the lady a loan extension. Cue the worst. movie. I. have. ever. watched. My husband and I hated it so much that every time we watch something shitty we say that was terrible, but it wasn’t Drag Me to Hell terrible. It is the movie that all shitty movies are measured against. My best friend loved it and he is no longer allowed to rec movies to us.

4. What are some fandom/fic things that irrationally annoy you? The mob mentality that crops up when there is a disagreement over anything. It happens in every fandom. Conversation devolves into vague-blogging and and passive aggressive tags. We are adults. Somebody doesn’t like what you like or vice versa? Cool. You keep liking your shit the way you like it and they can keep liking their shit the way they like it. There is more than enough shit for all of us to like. There will never be a shortage of shit, trust me on this.

Don’t agree with someone? Wonderful. Either talk about it like an adult and have a conversation or leave it alone. For example, there is a topic that I 100% stay away from in the Kingsman fandom because it makes me very uncomfortable and anxious. I do not agree with the popular opinion of the fandom regarding this topic. However, I realize that it is a popular topic, which very few, if any at all, of the rest of the fandom has an issue with, so I either blacklist it or take a little tumblr break until the conversation dies down. Because I am an adult and I am responsible for my internet experience.

5. Write a summary for the fic you want to write but never will? Q has been clean for years, before even MI6 got their hands on him. The day James leaves with Madeline, however, Q finds himself in a ratty hoodie and torn jeans, walking down the same street where he once traded favors for whatever drug he needed that day. Cocaine for coding, X for laughter, morphine to forget. He just needs it this once. Morphine to forget James and whatever they were becoming before Swann, well, swanned, in. Cocaine to get him to work the day after.

He has this under control. He does.

Until he doesn’t. Until Q is one needle away from existing and Geoffery, the addict, is about to take his place again.

Until James comes back and sees what he left in his wake.

6. Someone writes a story that perfectly hits all your buttons. That story includes: _____, ______, and _________. HC, Dom/Sub and ANGST. Kill me with the angst (bonus points if one of the pairing is in a downward spiral of self-destructive tendencies).

7. I’m stealing @colinfilth’s question once asked on twitter bc it was SO GOOD: what is the fic one would write that clued your readers in that your identity had been stolen? A fic where there is a MCD of one people in the pairing, or the pairing the fic centers around does not end up together in the end. I want everyone to suffer terribly, cry and gnash their teeth, but they have to end up together and happy by the last sentence. It literally can be the last sentence that brings them back together, but it HAS to be there. After much pain and suffering of course.

8. Most embarrassing celebrity crush, past or present? I thought George Hamilton was the shit when I was really young for some reason. For the life of me I can’t even remember why or what show he was in that I watched.

9. How much research will you do for a fic? Wing it? Get lost in a wikipedia hole? Read actual books on a topic? Google translate? Get consulting with native speakers? I will go as far as I need to to make sure whatever I am writing is as correct as possible. I don’t have a brit picker though because I am too introverted to ask, so that is an opportunity I have in my fics.

10. The one thing the creator of your current fandom could do to kill your fandom love. Not give us multiple shots of Whiskey’s ass in those Levis.

I jest. A little.

Honestly, even if the movie sucks, I will still be here because the fan fic is phenomenal and I love the people I interact with within the fandom. And if the fandom falls apart, I will still be here by myself, re-reading the fan fic that has already been written.

My questions:

1. What is something you loved as a child that you still love as an adult?

2. What is a show/book/band/movie that you love but are embarrassed to admit to?

3. If you have a day completely to spend as you please, what do you do?

4. What book or fic can you literally read over and over again to the point where you could probably recite it, but you still read it?

5. If you wear makeup, what is the one thing you could not live without?

6. Who is a role model for you? (Fictional or Real)

7. What fandom were you in, that you are no longer in, that you miss even though you won’t go back to it?

8. What is your aesthetic?

9. If you had to choose on to give up, would you give up reading or listening to music. Why?

10. What is the one thing that you feel as if you must do before you die? The number one spot on your bucket list.

11. How long have you been friends with your best friend(s)?

I’m tagging @opalescentgold, @timetospy, @mannersmakethmoi, @privatelyvex, @alethiaii, @plotqueen and @eggsy-youcheekytart, and anyone else who hasn’t done it yet.

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