Ready to learn about one of Peter Parkers rarest seen girlfriends? She's got 5 total appearances and that up there is how we first see her. It's Marvel Team-Up #80 and we meet her after she and Pete have gone to Shakespeare in the park...
...THEN SHE GET'S ATTACKED BY A WEREWOLF!
And that werewolf is Dr Strange! Doc almost killed her so she's in the hospital. Pete gives her a kiss before leaving while she's barely conscious! It's a weird thing to do!
But hey next time we see Cissy they're fully making out so no harm no foul. She says "Roseanne Eposito said I was a fool to date you, Peter" which is fun because Roseanne has had 0 other mentions in any Marvel comic.
Then they get attacked by evil Russians! It's the Crimson Dynamo! Also, Darkstar and Vanguard have kidnapped her father?!
Pete has to act like he's been defeated to hide his secret identity. Pretty rough thing to do instead of saving two people.
Apparently her dad is a super scientist and they need him to build an anti-matter bomb. The Hulk shows up (this is Marvel Team-Up after all) and Cissy's dad gets shot. Sorry Cissy!
Next time we see Cissy it's the Empire State University Technology fair! The Beast is there getting all the ladies.
Even Cissy wants a piece of Hank McCoy!
Killer Shrike and Modular Man (in his 2nd and final appearance) attack the fair!
They get away with some gizmo but that's not important. Here's Cissy's final on panel appearance. She scored part of Beast's torn shirt, says she had a lot of fun, but crucially doesn't invite Pete in for more make-outs. Sorry Pete! At least she didn't get killed!
So that's the last time we see Cissy, but 36 years later @ryannorth wrote her as Pete's inevitably cancelled Valentine's date.
Thanks Ryan!
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Franklin confirming himself a mutant once more.
Thank you Sir North.
Eat Shit, Slott, You Hack.
From next week's FF.
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Fantastic Four #18 by Ryan North and Carlos Gómez. Cover by Alex Ross. Variant cover by Phil Noto. Out in March 2024.
"THE SECRET OF FRANKLIN RICHARDS!
Franklin Richards has been an immortal, a god, an Omega-level mutant – and more.
He’s created life, entire universes, and been worshipped for it. He’s ended life and been cussed out with just as much sincerity.
But there’s something else Franklin Richards has done – and is doing – that nobody else in the universe knows about.
Also in this issue: An invisible asteroid threatening all life on Earth and the all-new S.H.I.E.L.D.!"
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Shout out to Ryan North for writing how kids would realistically react to other kids having super powers
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Today’s issue of Fantastic Four is one of the best summations of Doctor Doom as a character in the entirety of Marvel Comics’ history, because after learning that Mr. Fantastic and Invisible Woman’s kids have ended up lost in time, his immediate response is to barge over to the FF gloat about how he will save Valeria and Franklin and prove himself superior to them once and for all. Then he goes back in time to try and rewrite history so they’re never in danger…
And he fails.
Miserably.
Every rewrite of history fails horribly to achieve the result he wants, usually because instead of telling the FF what he’s doing or what’s happening, he just shows up and kills everything in sight that could be a threat. When he repeatedly fails to alter the initial incident, he tries to stop the incident from happening in the first place. He fucks it up again repeatedly, either creating worse timelines where the kids die horribly or improved timelines that he immediately undoes because the good timelines are ones where he doesn’t get everything he wants and he refuses to accept that he could ever be in the wrong. Rather then change his approach, he just goes back further and tries to erase the Fantastic Four from ever existing in the first place while still ensuring the kids are born somehow… and he fails again because it just creates a timeline where Galactus eats Earth because the FF aren’t there to stop him. At that point Doom just snaps and starts repeatedly killing all the superheroes over and over again, and it still fails to get what he wants.
Doom comes to three conclusions. Either he is God’s most favorite creation (obviously) or the original timeline was already the optimized version created by his own future self. He rejects these hypotheses, the former because Doom thinks he’s better than God, the latter because “this surely isn’t the best I could manage”. The third and final conclusion Doom reaches is that he made a mistake trying to improve upon “perfection” and that his present self was already optimized by the fact that he is Doom, so he goes back to the exact moment where he began all this time travel shit and sabotages himself, with the time traveling Doom getting erased from history while present day Doom just stands there baffled as to why he isn’t time traveling away.
Then the FF beat up Present Doom like always, and he throws a temper tantrum and flies off while screaming at them about how he totally still won and also they better save Valeria and Franklin or else he’ll come back. He never realizes that he thwarted himself.
It is the funniest fucking thing to read in the strangest way possible and it perfectly explains who Doctor Doom is.
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