“You behave yourself now or I’m coming back to kick your butt!” -Henry’s final line was probably one of the most ironic lines spoken on MASH.

Chapter 9:

Just a reminder:

Because I am NOT typing it out again.

Anyway, Eco says that even if Dietrich put weird ideas in his head, he hopes his words would keep Belca safe for a while. He knows that Belca might be happier as Dietrich's puppet but...that'll be no fun for a little stinker like Eco. Then he hears a bunch of noise from outside...

But the Captain first! He can't relax in the mansion while the Amontel are attacking so he walks outside the room. Then he sees Belca confront the Amontels outside. When Belca is shot at, he manages to dash down and take the arrow for him, protecting his precious Mariebelle.

Then the captain sees his pendant, finally (actually) recognizing him. Tenrou thinks that, with Belca's fancy clothes, he's the young master of this place so he wants him to take him to where the slaves are. But Shingetsu tells him to wait, saying there's a signal from the bank of the lake and that means Dietrich's men already knows they're there. They do a Pincer attack on them, they're screwed. Tenrou says oh well, they got all the information they need from the maid. They can just take Belca as a hostage instead and get out of Dodge. The Captain tries to protect him but ends up with an arrow through his ankle, courtesy of Shingetsu. Belca tries to protect him but he's outmanned; they give him a choice: come with them or the captain and the maid dies. Despite that throwing a wrench in his "return to Orcelito" plans, Belca agrees, becoming a hostage.

Captain is thrown into the waters and the Amontels board a boat with their new hostage. They tell the maid to send a message: they're return with Belca later, offering his life for their comrades.

Later on, Dietrich gets word that Belca was kidnapped, the Amontels cleverly outmanuevering them by going someplace where they weren't expected to show up and thus taking advantage of the lack of guards there. Dietrich's attendant guy says that it's kind of a good thing that this happened before word was sent back that they have the prince in their custody. Dietrich says the prince must be rescued; he can't miss this chance to get a connection with Lord Lagen!

Shingetsu and Tenrou are greeted back at their meet-up spot by another Amontel, Belca in tow. Then the Captain walks up, having swam after them to save Belca. Then he passes out.

Back at the jail, a maid comes with Eco's blanket and heater (Oh, he was serious about that...). Eco recognizes her as Annette, a maid who's been working in the mansion for years. She's happy to be recognized and gives him his blanket...and his missing poem book, knowing how much he missed it. Eco is so happy...which is a feeling he'll want to hold onto as much as possible because Annette then tells him Belca was kidnapped.

Eco demands to be let out to rescue him but Annette says that's impossible. Dietrich has the keys and if she steals them, she won't just be flogged...she'll be subject to the experiments, just like the Amontel!

Wait, what?

Yeah, that's what Dietrich has been using the Amontels for, shooting them up with drugs and stuff like that. Eco asks if he's working with Lagen on that and Annette confirms it, asking how he knows about that. Instead of answering, he asks Annette to do him another favor...

Meanwhile, Hostage!Belca wakes up against a giant fox in a cave somewhere. Shingetsu greets him, currently dressing the Captain's wounds. Belca tries to push him away, thinking he's attacking him, only for Shingetsu to take out a knife and throw it at him...hitting the rat about to pounce on him. Apparently the rats in this setting are venomous...he then tells Belca that because he's their hostage, they're not gonna hurt him because they need him for the exchange. Until then, he should get some rest. His giant fox doesn't bite. Also, the captain's wound is (somehow) shallow and the shot was just meant to scare Belca. Some herbs have been applied on the wounds so he should be fine in 2 to 3 days. Belca is awed that these monsters are behaving in such a surprisingly rational manner. He still wants to leave...but the Captain has a fever so it's impossible to move him. He sighs and calls the Captain an idiot, asking why he had to pull such a dumb stunt for him...

Outside the cave, an Amontel named Izayoi comes in and is briefed on the situation. Then he finds the pendant the Amontel swiped from Belca, horrified that they KIDNAPPED THE FUCKING PRINCE.

Now, at the Royal Prefecture in Neue Favrille, Kiliko and Lagen's men are trying to locate pages from the Rovisco Documents as well as decipher them. Turns out Lagen's family are called the Guardians of History and this is their main duty. Then they find some controversial literature, including some text explicitly speaking out against the royal family. The missing pages were most likely taken out by someone who is against the crown which also means someone else knows about the secret backroom...

Tenrou stomps back into the cave when we cut back to Belca, demanding to know if the latter is actually the Prince. He then comments if he's Hector's brother, he's his exact opposite. That pisses Belca off and he charges him, screaming that it's the Amontel's fault that Hector is dead because he wanted to treat them as human beings and the elders killed him for it. The other Amontels are shocked to hear this...and so is the Captain who just woke up. Tenrou recovers quickly, glad that they can now do a hostage exchange with the Stone Capital's King. Belca laughs at him, saying there's no way that the kingdom will bargain for a troublemaker like him. Sure, the elders want him but that's only because he knows they killed Hector. The Captain tries to get Belca to stop talking but Belca goes on, saying they wasted their time and that the kingdom wouldn't want to negotiate with a bunch of evil disgusting creatures like them anyway.

The Amontel are about to fuck him up but Shingetsu stops them, wanting to ask Belca a question: did he see it? You know, when the Evil Deity that created the Amontel...did it? They were just minding their own business in the mountains and then the Stone Capital guys came in and started colonizing. Being hunted, treated as slaves, eaten like food...they keep calling the Amontel evil but the way the Amontel are treated is evil in of itself!

So...on the Western Trail at the Florel Town Outpost, Musca is being prepared for her stay. While there, she overhears rumors that Orcelito is indeed acting strangely and some think he has been replaced with someone else. Musca thinks to herself: her mom's dead, her dad's sick, Hector's "gone away" and Belca is missing...she's the only one who can save her older brother. But how is she going to get back to the palace?

Enter Ossan.

It's his last day in Florel and he's about to head to Lobnec Peninsula, having already submitted his resignation. The chapter ends with Musca seeing him...

Everyone in the fandom is being all OH YAY ED GOT A NEW BUNNY FRIEND AND HE'S GOING TO LOVE IT AND CARE FOR IT AND IT'LL BE THE NEW SHIP'S PET yeah folks, I hate to break it to you, but I do not have high hopes for that bunny's longevity. With the exception of Ned, this show does not have a great history with animals (Karl, turtle vs. crab, Fang's unnamed dog). And rabbits in media have a long history of dying, either for comedy or to indicate villainy. They're a harmless, innocent animal that the bad guy kills to show how evil he is.

In addition, this is the classic "Retirony" trope, where a character waxes poetic about plans for the future right before being brutally killed: "Mister Bun, I'm so glad you're here with m-OH GOD NO."

I bet that rabbit barely lasts longer than a single scene.

Vera S08.E01 (2018)

Naz Ahmed, I hope you have more to do than Dr Chandra did, this is probably the last of today's Joplin-watch and I'm getting towards the end of the list of things that are easy to find on terrestrial TV :')

Rooting for him not being the guy they found in the abattoir incinerator :')

Vera herself is a sweet wee Geordie granny detective who sounds permanently exhausted and I love her already.

PHEW not him in the incinerator. I was preparing myself for flashbacks only. :') Instead it was a severe case of retirony on a policeman's last day before retirement. And given he was executed with a bullet to the back of the head, everyone is remarkably chill! No hysterical yelling for Vera and her north-eastern colleagues.

Ah ha! Again, a half hour wait and he is revealed to be a lorry driver who maybe delivered the body to the abattoir. He's not a fan of coppers.

He's not happy! And I note he's not bothering with a Geordie accent now he's surrounded by Geordies. According to his boss he's a decent guy anyway.

Oh dear, he's served time in Durham for violent affray...

It's not looking good, babe! But it'd be too simple if you did it...

Here comes his mysteriously expensive lawyer and off goes Naz.

OH I knew the daughter of the dead copper was familiar! Constance from BBC Musketeers! <3

An hour and a half episode and we've basically had two scenes. I cherish Brasso even more than ever now - the roles Joplin got over ten years ago were so much more fun and varied than the more recent stuff :(

And I also like Vera a lot less now - she's tough, sure, but she's such a fucking cop. Standard procedural fare tbh - everyone is horrible and I don't care who did it or why. How do people watch this stuff week in and week out and root for any of them?

Rating

Dead? Presumably not

Evil? This was always a flippant question, but the show is not interested in exploring much of an answer beyond ‘probably, yes’, given that he’s repeatedly defined only by his past offense and conviction. Which makes me inclined to say - inherently? No. But what is there to go on, after all

Affects the plot? Not as such.

Another disappointing 1/5. Thank goodness for Hustle earlier today, everything else has been something of a bust.

Skyrim Headcanon

All Nords are born with magnetic knees.

mood

R.I.P. Tom Petty

@jonrosenbergToday's SFAM is about retirony. It may not be coherent, I can't tell right now. 

http://amultiverse.com/comic/2018/04/27/golden-age/

Season 8 Episode 2 - Fear Is for the Winter

It’s the deep breath before the plunge. The battle for the living is about to begin, but before it there’s not much to do besides playing the waiting game.

Which is a boring game, Hungry Hungry Hippos is much better. But don’t worry, I have figured out a way to defeat the White Walkers. Just bring back the right people:

When the show started, the main focus was on the Southern politics and wars and so on, but all the time there was the clock ticking behind the Wall. At some point, none of this will matter anymore, as the Dead come and gods protect us if we are not ready.

Turns out we aren’t. And the Southern politics didn’t go anywhere. The Dead will likely get defeated in the next episode, otherwise there wasn’t a point in spending an episode first in the preparing for a great battle, and - very likely - the whole next episode on the actual battle. The Dead will stop here, but at what price?

And after the survivors walk or are carried out of Winterfell’s burnt ruins and see the fallen army of the Dead, they will still have Cersei and the Iron Throne and family trees to worry about. A lovely thought. Life goes on.

But in the beginning of the episode that is as far away as the end of the world. Jaime gets an audience with the Queen, and it goes well, considering the circumstances. Or the circumstances make it go better than it otherwise would. Bran gives out that he remembers what Jaime did to him, but doesn’t tell the others. That one would have tipped the scales, all the rest he could label as acts of war during wartime. And his good deeds have consequences too, which is nice. It’s almost like those video games where you can pick choices and at the end the game remembers them.

Redemption is an interesting thing. Usually in fantasy stories when the bad guy decides to become good they die immediately, so there’s no moral dilemma of whether they should still be punished or not. 

An example from old Star Wars novels is Kyp Durron, who was one of Luke’s pupils in the new Jedi Academy. He was influenced by an old evil Sith spirit (those are just lying around everywhere) and killed millions of people. In the end he became good again and received pretty much no penalty. That was a big cause of debate to fans back then, I’m too young to remember.

But by being a great Jedi, he must have saved millions and millions of more people later during his career, so isn’t that a much better outcome than if he was incarcerated for the rest of his life? What use would that have been? I don’t know, I don’t think that a case like that can be mapped out to the real world that well.

Bran follows this line of thought. Whatever happened, here they are now, and now Bran is the Three-Eyed Raven so who cares of what Bran thought back then.

He says he is no longer Bran, but something else entirely. I don’t think there was any mind swap, he is still the same person with mostly the same brain. But as he now sees everything in the past and the present he must feel like he is outside a normal person’s life. He can take an universal view of the world which doesn’t care about specific people, and so he must take that view for the sake of the world. At least that’s how he thinks.

Gendry doesn’t take Arya’s weapon order seriously until she shows that she knows what she is doing. Arya seems to have made the plans herself, and doesn’t seem to have discussed it with anyone. Considering that the Dead have a self-destruct button in the form of the Night King, and the defenders have a trained Faceless assassin among them, putting one and one together should work.

Or not, since he’s on a dragon currently. That, and the Dead not needing sleep,and not leaving any good faces, puts a wrench on any plan to just go to the army and assassinate the big boss. She can’t exactly hide among them.

Winterfell is becoming spiky as a metal concert. The problem with fighting the Dead is that there’s no manual. The Night Watch managed to escape the Fist of the First Men, but that one and the Hardhome were so chaotic that few lessons of the enemy could be learnt there. As I see it, the dead have the advantage that their “morale” is perfect and they will fight until completely destroyed. They also won’t be scared of any injury when doing stunts. But they don’t do any actual maneuvers, no shield walls, nothing like that. And when not directly ordered by a Walker to go to specific places, they have even less tactical thinking. So there should be ways to distract them or otherwise make them spend their forces to stupid things.

The problem is that the Walkers direct them to do just that anyway (walk over the cliff, the first thousand will soften the rest’s fall), because they feel like they have the numbers. And they are right in that.

Daenerys is angry at Tyrion for not figuring out that Cersei lied. Jorah goes to talk to her about it and asks her to forgive him. She does, but has there yet been a time when someone does something she thinks is bad and she just… doesn’t threaten them, or outright kill them, or send them away, or get talked out of it by someone else? I don’t remember. If the only thing stopping her from burning everyone is that people talk her out of it every other time… In a vote I’d be on Jon’s side.

I also like her gray-and-red dress, more than the ones she wore on previous seasons. And it's some color amidst all the black in Winterfell. Speaking of clothes, Lord Royce still wears his metal breastplate everywhere. Sounds cold up here.

And hey, is Robin Arryn here anymore? He has disappeared. Of course it would be silly to have a kid up here when he could be in the Eyrie, safer and actually ruling his lands. Maybe he turns up just in time to die.

Daenerys goes to speak with Sansa, trying to bond with her over being girl bosses. Sansa has seen enough queens to do just what Daenerys tries to do to be impressed, and asks what her plans are for the North. Do they get independence or not?

Why not? Sure, it’s half the continent, but currently you own a small island, Daenerys. A good ally is a much better deal than a resentful vassal. But she is Daenerys Stormborn yada yada, and the North is her by right. Shame she never met Stannis.

Theon is back, and Sansa is glad to take him and his small force to defend the castle. They aren’t the only ones arriving, refugees arrive all the time and are divided into those who can fight and those who can’t. Since the Dead arrive in the 24 hours, many and more must still be on their way, coming through the woods when the battle starts. Well, unless the Dead understand that they should simply siege and wait for the diseases and the lack of food to do their work for them, the battle will be short, however it’s going to end.

Davos and Gilly direct people to their destinations. There’s one young girl who has… has… oh. A scarred cheek, reminding both me and Davos of Princess Shireen. Ow. She goes to protect the crypt, and I hope it doesn’t get attacked (because she would wreck everybody who tries, obviously).

Considering that it has now been two episodes in the last season, and no one named has died yet, but almost everyone has gathered here ready for the big battle, the next episode - and ones coming afterwards - will be brutal. I’m not going to make any specific predictions, many side characters will die, some more main characters as well, you know, this is a big one. And since the show will end soon we wouldn’t see much of these people anymore anyway.

The survivors of the Wall arrive, and give the Deadline: the enemy will be here before dawn tomorrow. And I don’t see the battle lasting to sunrise. It’s an army of the Dead and the Night King, and it’s the climax, of course they’ll attack during the night. If they get defeated, that’s when the Sun will rise.

Final plans are made. They are going to meet the enemy on the field. Makes sense when you have Dothraki, But the Night King is the lynchpin. Bran declares that he will come to the field, as he wants to personally kill the Three-Eyed Raven.

This is a very tabletop RPG way of setting up a battle. The players can’t fight thousands of enemies with the usual combat rules. Even if the long battle won’t kill them it gets super monotone fast, so it’s better to set up something they can do and have that determine the battle’s result.

Tyrion is very interested in Bran’s story. Foreshadowing, or simply a character who very much wants to know stuff getting to meet someone who can rewind everywhere?

The goal of the White Walkers is given by Bran as “destroy humans”. That was clear before, but apparently there’s no other motive. They just kill. It’s just death. If they have a plan for after, humans don’t need to know. Maybe the Children made a mistake in the instructions and so they were added to the “kill all humans” command, or the Night King figured out that killing them eases the killing of humans, especially as they protected the Three-Eyed Raven. Anyway, programming is hard, I’d expect that programming living creatures is even harder.

Bran escaped from the cave to the Castle Black very easily if the Night King knew where he was all the time.

Missandei and Grey Worm discuss what their plans are when the wars are won and they can retire. One word: retirony. Take her picture and show it to the other Unsullied while you are at it, Grey Worm. I haven’t had an opinion, good or bad, about these two, they just are around. Of course I wish them good health and a happy relationship, but it feels like Sam and Gilly are using all the luck.

Oh, Ghost is here! But if someone is likely to join the long line of people and dying to protect Jon, it’s Ghost.

Sam worries about Jon not telling Daenerys. Dude, there’s something else on their plate right now, they can worry about that later if there’s going to be a later.

Comparing Sam the Kingmaker with Sam the self-proclaimed coward from the first episodes, there’s a very large difference. But since you can’t be brave without fear, Sam has become the bravest of all. I’m very proud of him.

Then there’s Edd, who is certain they are all going to die. Again. Well, that is one of the safest predictions there is, as long as you don’t specify a date. “And now there’s just us”. The Night’s Watch has dropped like flies already. And now the real winter is here.

But so is The Night Watch. It’s everyone here now. Everyone in Winterfell is now part of the shield that guards the realms of men. It’s not much fun, but some do this every day.

Since nobody is going to have any sleep, a group of people settles to sit beside the fire. There’s a wildling raider, a Southern smuggler, a Lannister squire, the Kingslayer, the Imp and a maiden from Tarth who likes to play with swords. All here and now, in the dark of a cloudy winter night, waiting. It’s a somber event, no matter how much Tormund tries to lift people’s spirits with his tales.

It’s equally somber outside, where the Hound and Beric divide a drink in the night that’s getting colder. Maybe I’m making a mistake watching this now in the height of summer instead of the winter, when the nights are 20 hours long here. I’d be in the proper mood then.

Arya decides to stop thinking of her “people I want to kill”-list (which has grown smaller since many of those fight on her side now) and instead starts “people I want to smash” -list, which currently has just Gendry in it. And she wastes no time with that list.

The discussion in the hearth room moves to Brienne, whom people are surprised to hear is not a ser. Jaime offers to knight her, as “Any knight can knight another.” I think you just made that up. I don’t think ser in the feudal hierarchy is just a title, being a knight is more than just letters before your name. But everyone allows that one, they are going to die anyway. And if they live, Daenerys will approve.

Jaime has his Valyrian sword, half of Ice, the half given to Joffrey and used mainly to cut books and cakes. Brienne has the other half, so Ice has returned to Winterfell just in time to be put in good use. Sam has brought the Tarly heirloom sword, Jon has Bearclaw, Arya Littlefinger’s dagger… that’s all of the mentioned ones, right? All in Winterfell. Nice.

Sam gives his father’s sword, Heartsbane, to Jorah, to honor his father. Legacy, again. Jorah declares that he is going to use it in Old Bear’s memory. He was the first leader who took the Dead seriously, and without whom Jon or Sam wouldn’t have done all they did to prepare.

A new song, Jenny of the Oldstones, with Pod as the singer. It’s not a merry song, it’s about dancing with ghosts. Well ghosts would perhaps be an improvement to those they’ll soon dance with.

Jon spends the last moments before the battle in the crypt, before it gets crowded with people. Now he gets to be dark and alone. Except not, Daenerys arrives, and manages to ask just one question before Jon already spills the beans. He just manages to reveal everything and hammer home that by the law he’s the rightful heir, but before they can discuss it any further the three blasts are blown. So the poorest possible timing.

And so the snarks and grumkins arrive to Winterfell. Is this the sort of story that you’d like?

Flash-fic-a-thon prompt: Star Force - Stiltskin's reaction when he realized they were trapped a long way from home and it would take a while or might even be impossible to return / contrasted with Lacey's reaction when she learned what had happened and presumably started to make plans for how they could maybe rescue the Aurora Borelius crew.

Shameless self-promotion of the Star Force pilot episode screenplay, available here.

=====

Stiltskin waited until he had returned to his quarters and locked the door before breaking down in the way he wanted to on the bridge. He was already well aware of the captain’s opinion of him and would not give the man the satisfaction of witnessing this moment, but as soon as he was in private, he let out the howl of desperation that he had been suppressing ever since the grim and icy realisation of the extent of their predicament had dawned. He relished the smarting pain of unyielding metal against his knuckles, hitting the doorframe until the sensation brought no more relief, and he collapsed down onto the floor, dishevelled and panting. There was blood running down his fingers, staining the milky stone of his ring, and Stiltskin closed his eyes, breathing in the ferrous tang. 

Oh, the retirony. This was supposed to be his last flight before he grounded and could spend the rest of his days with Lacey. Now, it seemed destined to be his last flight, period. He wasn’t upset, he wasn’t even scared. He was just so incredibly angry at the fates that had conspired. 

Eventually he looked down at the ring again, rubbing it clean and pressing his lips to it. He could not give up now, before he had even started. Lacey would be counting on him to make it home in one piece, and that was damn well what he was going to do. He vowed it. 

“I will see you again, Lace.”

X

For a few moments after the wormhole had sucked the Aurora Borealis out of their galaxy and all contact had been lost, the Force Base Medical Administration centre was silent. The staff had all been watching the launch on the large screens in the data room, and one could have heard a pin drop. 

Lacey couldn’t even breathe, her hands pressed over her mouth and her eyes wide. Her husband was on that ship, and now she had no idea where he was, or if he was even alive. Around her, she gradually heard the murmurs of her fellow officers, and she was aware of at least twenty pairs of eyes on her, of whispers of sympathy moving around the room. 

“Lace?” someone said softly. “Lace, do you want to go home?”

She didn’t reply, she couldn’t. What was there to say? She’d just watched her husband quite possibly perish on live television. Eventually, she managed to nod, and her colleague brought her bag and coat over to her, guiding her out into the elevator and into a hovertaxi. She glanced down at her hands, they were shaking, and the diamond of her wedding ring was glinting in the solar glow. 

Lacey took a deep breath. She could not and would not think the worst. 

“I will see you again, Stila.”

I'm less than five days away from the start of my retirement, and I feel I've been pretty lucky for most of my life, except for the times I made bad decisions. Let's hope I'm not actually playing a bit part in a bad action movie! [quote]Retirony is a way to make the audience feel sorry for a character's death without having to actually give him more than ten minutes of screen time. Anybody in a dangerous job who's only a few days away from retirement or flying one last mission before going home to marry their childhood sweetheart is absolutely doomed to death by Retirony, whether that takes the form of a cold-blooded criminal, an ace German fighter pilot or a great big robotic monster.[/quote]

TROPES:

Parental abandonment

A stunningly large number of heroes and their coteries are lacking in the parent department, either through death or in that they just aren't talked about. Even if both parents are alive, they may well be emotionally or physically distant.

Promotion to parent

A side effect of parental abandonment that occurs when the trope applies to siblings. The first born takes over the role of parent—enforcing the rules, setting curfews, delivering lectures, and bringing home the paycheck. They may be doing the parents' job, but they are still a brother or sister to everyone else, and will probably get into conflict with their siblings over how much power they should have and how much respect they deserve, depending on the ages of the younger ones, and the status of the original parents. The parents may have even specifically asked their eldest child to take care of the kids.

I Coulda Been A Contender!

Retirony is especially cruel when it strikes a character down in his or her prime just as he or she begins embarking on success and glory. At least the old soldiers in combat made something out of their lives even if they found no peace afterwards. These young souls don't have the opportunity to become somebodies — they get just a little taste of it before suffering a career-ending injury or circumstances force them to throw it all away. Naturally, this will be right after they reach the point that would make them bona fide superstars.

SUGGESTED FCS:

Tyler Posey, Lyndsey Fonseca, Kat Graham, Matt Cohen.

Gender UTP.

Age UTP.

Lymond for the ask meme?

Thanks! Sorry it took me a few days to answer :D

Fandom asks:

   the first character i ever fell in love with: I think probably Christian Stewart. Or maybe Turkey Mat, I can't recall who I latched onto first in GoK, but...it didn't end well for me either way. Though I think I always suspected Turkey Mat was a gonner, he gives off such a heavy vibe of Retirony.    a character that i used to love/like, but now do not: hmmm my feelings about Sibylla grew a lot more complicated through Checkmate - not, I stress, for her backstory, but for her actions in Checkmate.    a ship that i used to love/like, but now do not: I don't know that I can think of one.    my ultimate favorite character™: I latched onto Jerott, for reasons I can't entirely fathom (ok, there may be something about being the less naturally talented second, hanging around with people who quote things effortlessly and feeling like you're incapable of the kind of verbal wit they display so naturally, feeling like you're missing the point half the time). But he sticks around for Francis, even when he can't really figure out why, and Francis lets him help (or can't stop him from helping) at times when no one else is brave/stupid enough to try it. Jerott's struggle to understand Francis and his self-destructive side is actually something that can be so personal idek. I can't stand the man when he's around Marthe, but around Francis he's willing to learn and strive in a way that doesn't seem to come to him otherwise.    prettiest character: are Francis's hands a character?    my most hated character: Bailey. No question. Grotesque, horrible man.    my OTP: I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It's Francis/Jerott. But I am an easy-going, ship and let ship multishipper and Francis/Philippa brings me much delight too, especially. Um. Post-canon, let's say. I'm also being slowly won round by the idea of Jerott/Danny. Slowly.   ��my NOTP: Jerott/Marthe keep! them! away! from! each! other!!! This is the opposite of mlm/wlw solidarity it's two people who bring out the absolute worst in each other, one of whom actively goes out of her way to encourage the most destructive and self-destructive habits in the other. Ughhghfdgdhf I hate it why did she ever agree to marry him.    favorite episode: hmm favourite scene? It's hard to choose over the whole course of books. I famously love the horse show in PiF, but that's because I always forget about Jerott shouting homophobic slurs :/ The hall of revels is of course delightful - though I maybe slightly prefer the wet and muddy ride where Philippa follows Francis out to Bailey's house. Any and all rooftop shenanigans, with Robin, Jerott and Philippa. And any scene with Kate Somerville. I also really love the scene with Marthe and Danny towards the end of Checkmate.    saddest death: wow. well how do you choose? I'm going to stick with Christian - for the sheer pointlessness of it and for the way Margaret Douglas crows about it.    favorite season: my favourite book is Disorderly Knights. I love how vivid the sense of place is in all the books, but it's highlighted so well by the switch from Scotland to Malta and back again. In terms of Lymond getting caught up in Actual Historical Disasters it's my favourite too, because he's brought along as a witness, but isn't actually close enough to the powers leading things in DK to have any influence on averting the disaster - the cruelty of the way things go wrong for him in TRC I find particularly painful because he's there to be a voice that understands what we already know about history and he's in a position to be listened to, but he can't be listened to because that's not how things happened. In DK he can be apppalled by the Knights but the stakes are different, he can succeed in small actions to save people - rallying the farmers and helping Salablanca and stopping the explosion - but he's not made it his fight in the same way. Ok, there's a bit of the actual painful history in terms of Will and Wat's deaths, and Wat's death in particular hit hard for me - but again it doesn't feel like something where Lymond's trying to negotiate with someone who *can't* listen for historical reasons (Ivan), but like someone desperately trying to hold things together even as entropy takes hold, which I think is just more relatable/timeless than the advisor not being listened to role. Also I love Philippa's arc in DK, and we have Margaret Erskine around still, who's an absolute lamb, and Gabriel's a fantastically awful, quietly unhinged villain, and Jerott's redemption in parallel to Philippa's and the tragedy of Joleta. It's a story where Francis realises the importance of control - of the self, but also of information and all the vying parties around him - and though he maybe does not come to healthy conclusions about it, with PiF as a digression, it leads directly into the kind of person he is in TRC.    least favorite season: it took me longest to read QP, I think because I had no patience with the eleventy million French courtiers who were referred to in various ways, by various titles, and many of whom were actual historical figures and I wasn't sure to what extent I needed to be aware of this. But I think TRC left me...cold *puts on sunglasses* more than the others. There's a lot that I like about it, but reading it wasn't *fun* like reading most of the others was (ok so I'm sorry, the torture of two toddlers and crippling opium addiction is fun to me in a way that seeing a character regress into emotional frigidity and make a series of inevitably pointless attempts to change history isn't). The last quarter has some fun bits, to be sure - Philippa at court is a delight, and the hall of revels - and of course there's everything in TRC that is touched by Daniel Hislop the bishop's bastard and perfectly pansexual agent of chaos this book needed. But the Russian bits, my god, too bleak for me, too hopeless, especially when you know about Chancellor.    character that everyone else in the fandom loves, but i hate: I'm not sure there is one? I don't *love* Gabriel as a villain to quite the extent some of fandom does, and I definitely don't stan Marthe as hard as lots of you (and I constantly feel like a bad person because of it, don't worry).    my ‘you’re piece of trash, but you’re still a fave’ fave: Jerott, obviously.    my ‘beautiful cinnamon roll who deserves better than this’ fave: Christian, she is a cinnamon roll in a way that many others who nevertheless deserve better are not.    my ‘this ship is wrong, nasty, and makes me want to cleanse my soul, but i still love it’ ship: ngl I will read Gabriel/Francis/Jerott because it's so fucked up and the idea of them fighting over Jerott spiritually, intellectually and physically all at once is great.    my ‘they’re kind of cute, and i lowkey ship them, but i’m not too invested’ ship: I guess Kate/Adam? It's a bit sudden, but I really just want nice things for both of them by that point.

I wonder how many Aperture workers had only one day until retirement when GLaDOS took over.

29, 39 & 44!

Yay, questions!29. What books are you reading?For school: just finished Richard II and Pygmalion. I need to start Henry IV part 1. Not for school: Bring Up the Bodies by Hilary Mantel. I love it but I never have time to read it!39. Been caught doing something you weren’t supposed to do?I remember the hilarious time when I was about four when my friend and I were cutting her hair and her mom found us and totally freaked. We only cut the ends off! But she was really mad. I'm sure I've been caught doing something I wasn't supposed to do since then, but I can't remember!44. Have you ever fired a gun?I never have! I would like to, just to see what it's like and everything.