#put the puffer fish on my feed
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Beast Mode is out today!
Yesterday I held a listening party on Bandcamp to celebrate the release of my new EP, Beast Mode, and give people some insights into the songs. I thought I'd share my notes for those who couldn't make it, so you can read as you listen along. The EP is produced by Chris Marney (referred to as Chris throughout here).
Pass the puffer is the first track and I wrote the lyrics after reading about an episode of Spy in the Wild on BBC. It was narrated by David Tennant. In it, the dolphins pass round a puffer fish and get blissed out from small doses of the lethal toxins. I did a bit more research on dolphins and put something together that’s not supposed to be political or animal rights based, just observations of strange behaviour.
The music was written a while ago, and I added the guitar and dolphin samples a bit later. I think my producer did a good job in bringing out the bass notes a bit better than I had it in the original mix - that’s never my strongest point.
Fed to the tigers is probably the saddest song on the EP. Again, in terms of the music, the guitar was the last thing I added and I think it gives it an extra dimension with the tremolo weaving in and out. The lyrics explore how a zoo came to decide to kill a 2-year-old giraffe. Marius the giraffe was born at Copenhagen zoo, but he was from the same gene pool as too many other giraffes in European zoos so was no use for breeding the next generation and it costs money and requires space to keep such animals. They didn’t want to sell him to some private collector or a circus so decided the most humane thing was to kill him and feed him to the tigers. I don’t make a judgement, just think it’s a dilemma that’s worth thinking about…
Cyborg (broken animal) is up third and it’s less of a story than an exploration of these around adding technology to humans and animals. There’s a philosophical element to it in terms of how we should feel about experimenting with impulses going straight to the brain to control movements and things, plus a bit of a fear of what if it goes wrong and robot-insect armies start attacking us!
Musically it is the probably the closest to dance music through parts of it, although there’s a really brutal guitar solo in it to throw you off. You can hear what Chris did with the remix a bit later for a different take on the song.
Sweet Kiss of Death (or the story) was suggested to me by my Twitter friend Stephen Haggart. There was a horse (Sweet Kiss) that won a race, but the jockey died on his back some time before the end. I decided to write the song from the point of view of the horse who was henceforth nicknamed Sweet Kiss of Death.
I wrote the music for this a couple of years ago, but played around with it and added the weird talking bass sound to get away from it being too traditional a reggae sound. I’ve always loved reggae and those who’ve listened to my earlier albums will have heard elements in those from the genre. Also from my band at uni, we had a dub reggae stage, influenced by Boo Radleys and other 90s bands who added it into rock/indie.
The cyborg remix is not the first time my voice has been put through a decoder. The Invisible squirrel also did it with the remix of Trace in 2022: Listen here for that. I love what Chris did with this. It has a very different feel from my version, while still being recognisable. The guitar solo's gone, but there are some really gnarly synths to give that menace still.
Radioactive hybrid terror pigs was originally released in October 2022. It was the first song Chris mixed for me, so I thought I’d bring it back, as it was just a single, so has never been on Bandcamp. It was fast and punky all the way through before, so I slowed down the verses and chopped up the guitar line, adding a few synth elements, too.
I read a story about how the wild boars moved into the contaminated land without feeling any ill effects and made themselves at home, inter-breeding with the domesticated pigs that had been left behind in the desperate aftermath of the disaster. The title’s a little bit sensationalist, but when I read it, I just thought that has to be a song! Thematically it fits perfectly with this EP.
I hope you enjoy listening to the EP. Please buy a copy on Bandcamp if you can, or just share it with people who you think will like listening to it. Word of mouth and recommendations from friends are the best promo in the world.
#singer songwriter#indie music#songwriting#new music#electronic#cyborg#dolphins#zoo animals#sweet kiss#remix#radioactive
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"Everyone has their vices"
How to determine if you're going through a difficult time:
Stop all your medications against your therapist's advice, since the last one you tried made you want to kill yourself.
End your first relationship, during which you spent 80% of your free time with that person exclusively. Proceed to have limited close friendships.
Overbook your schedule with 3 jobs, 2 time-consuming clubs, difficult classes, and a new honor society that makes you feel shiny, but will take up so much of your time. Attempt to make new friendships, while never seeing your truly close friends, your roommates.
Spend 3-weeks in your hometown. This forces you to slow down, put a halt to the momentum. You may actually being to realize that you're struggling. You may actually reach out to loved ones, have meaningful conversations about the support you need, or at least reach an understanding about how you're not perfect, and, hey, maybe you don't need to be.
As soon as you consider getting back on medication, hop on a plane to Italy. You're going abroad for 8 weeks with people you don't know, in a place where you don't know the language, doing a project that you don't enjoy.
You don't stop being sad in Europe. I learned this the hard way. I am learning* this the hard way. Venice is mystical -- I continue to get lost in the narrow passageways and romantic bridges that divide the city into fractiles. And, it's not a home. I think even if I was happy, it feels offputting. There are no trees or grass in any real sense, and the resulting air quality has irritated my lungs. The canal water is murky, and often smells of sewage or fish. The people are, well, non-existent. That's not true. It was charmingly/eerily quiet prior to Carnival, which is when all hell broke loose. Those skinny walkways became bloated with people in puffer jackets and backpacks and masks. It would probably be fun in a lot of different circumstances. If, for example, I had ever intended on traveling here. But, of course, this location was not my choice. It never was. The place where I was supposed to go, deemed (rightfully) too unsafe to travel to by my university, was also not where I wanted to go, but at least I had prepared myself for it. I set the expectations, and I was disappointed by the change in plan. This all manifests itself as ungrateful, I'm aware of that. I am lucky to have this experience, and I have had a lot of laughs, and made good friends while here, but it still does not discount the sour emotions which have bubbled to the surface.
I won't bore you with the details, but I feel like I didn't know the extent to which I could hate myself before coming on this trip. I can't do anything right, according to myself. The self-hatred feeds the anxiety, which prevents me from doing what I want to do or say or act how I want, which feeds the depression. It's a positive feedback loop of negativity.
I tried to do a lot before telling my parents. I know that they would never be mad at me for being upset, they've dealt with troubled children before. But they worry about me, and I never really give them enough to show them not to worry about me, texts and phone calls are few and far between. But I hit a wall when I was traveling, we went to Bologna. Everything that could have gone wrong, did. I wasted money on train I didn't take, our plans kept falling through, I kissed a girl at the club which made the two guys I was with go strangely quiet on the ride home. I felt like my nerves were shot. We woke up that Sunday morning at 5:30 to catch a bus and then a train and then another bus (when they say it's easy to travel in Europe, they're lying) to the Ferrari Museum, which I honestly had no interest in going to. So, we boarded that bus, with the dredges of clubgoers returning home, and I just sobbed. I took a train back to Venice, and called my parents to tell them everything I've been feeling.
Self-medication. That was my mother's recommendation to me. "Go find some weed, someone there has to sell it. If you can't find that, at least wine is cheap there." I took it to heart. I went out, I bought some weed, and for a week straight, I prescribed myself 2 long drags from an overfilled blunt of the terrace outside my room. Did it help? Of course not, but it numbed things a little bit.
And then, of course, there's the alcohol. I took that advice a little too seriously, unfortunately. Never in my life have I blacked out more frequently than I have here. I will go out buzzed, get to the bar, have a drink or two, and the night will have escaped me. I wake up in the morning still in my clothes from the night before, lights on, and with the cash in my pocket from the night before replaced with a pounding headache. We decided to go clubbing all night a few weekends back, because, when in Rome, I guess. I remember the bus ride there, the walk from the bus station, getting in the doors and getting my free drink that came with my ticket, and then that's it! The entire night, 11PM-5AM, gone from my memory. The people I was with remember it all too well. I apparently went behind the VIP bar to steal pineapple and candies, too 50+ flash photos on my digital camera, and kept running away from them (they told me this in good spirits, thank god). I think I just need to escape sometimes, and that's how my mind is choosing to do it.
Brynne said that she'll go through phases where she's just out of it and that's why she blacks out so often (not scientifically proven, I checked). I guess I'm just in one of those stages in life. The economy of my health is up and down, it's not managed by trends in the market. Maybe if it was, I'd have predicted such an intense downturn.
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More Dorado!
Jimmy Tortuga called to invite me to go fishing, a request i was quick to agree with. Jimmy is a lucky fisherman and i knew we'd catch fish. Normally by now the Dorado are gone, moving to? but this season they are abundant from California to Costa Rica. Last trip we caught 10, this time 6, but they were twice as big, averaging 20 pounds. With 2 of Tortugas pals we set off at 6:30 am , Rudolpho our guide. Only 30 kilometers offshore, but a nasty cross chop 3 feet high from random directions kept us rolling and bouncing as the boat fast trolled.
Too choppy to see but 1 turtle, and the dolphins left when the tuna boat came through, and not even many birds, a usual sign of feed. There were 4 other boats out, and 1 got 2 sailfish, another a few dorado, 1 got nothing! We hit dorado after half an hour. Don't know how he sees the signs but Rudolpho put us.on the fish. Taking turns we struggled to land each fish. They ran , sounded, jumped and were just plain heavy, so each took 10 minutes of hard reeling to get to the boat. No net or gaff, the deckhand grasps the leader and handlines the thrashing Dorado over the gunnel and into boat where they spit the hook and die quickly. The sad part is they turn colour, from irridescent green to pale blue, white, then back to faded green. Jimmy had a hard time with his. His lungs are screwed and he gasped when pumping the rod, needing to inhale a puffer. His buddy from Arkansaws took over.
In 3 hours we had six big fish, one each, since the deckhand and captain get a share. The big Penn deep sea reels are perfect for fighting fish, nice smooth drags, and stiff 6 foot rods with roller eyes. 30 pound test line, cut bait seined off the beach earlier, and a bright hoochie over all. The deckhand sets up spares, checks the bait after each fish, and runs his hand over the leader too, checking for nicks that would break under strain. Very pro routine. We did troll back halfway while the deckhand cleaned (filleted) the fish on cross gunnel boards brought for that purpose. My share was some 10 pounds, cheaper to buy at the market, but really fresh and it' a good experience to get offshore.
Total cost 3500 pesos(1000each with the tip of 500 to the deckhand) so $300 canadian or about $70 dollars each. We'd all brought bags, and I had my Mexican shopping bags to spread the load. I did forget my lunch in the fridge, and the captain said my banana was bad luck, so I was hungry by noon when we got to the beach. Stopped to pick up a fellow who'd just moored his boat and needed a ride back to the beach, and gave our extra bait to a crew just going out. Nothing wasted, a rough ride but well worth it for the experience and a bag of delicious fish.
Jimmy and friends staggered off to the bar for beer. I walked the busy beach past the lined up pongas and up to the highway for a combi home. Noon hour rush, they were all full, but route taxi( acar rather than a pickup truck) stopped to let out a passenger. and I
knowing the destination got a ride to the turnoff to Lazaro neighbourhood. it's still death defying to cross the 4 lane highway, and I,m glad I can still run!
Filled the freezer with the best tasting fillets , and dove in the pool to cool. likely my last fishing this year, as I have enough to eat fish 3 times a week till I go to Oaxaca.
Is the fishery sustainable? Internet says yes, since Dorado only live 4 years, spawn at 6 months (1 million eggs) and are not listed as at risk. So long as they stop long lining and don't start seining, the harvest is OK. There are not too many boats going out(all gringo fisherman). Locals make a buck, we eat. Ok
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Having been in several different animal keeping hobbies I've learned that, while all hobbies care deeply about their critters, fish keepers are a totally different breed.
The majority of reptile keepers avoid live feeding as it is considered cruel to put the prey through distress, even snails. And when it comes to enrichment, or a snake that refuses to eat pre-killed food, keepers will resort to elaborate wiggle techniques to simulate living prey, only feeding live prey as a last resort if the snake is at risk of starvation.
Ant keepers will avoid live feeding insects as it is considered cruel to the feeder, and it risks harming the ants in the colony. They will often go to great lengths to avoid harming a single ant during maintenance and will painstakingly track down escapees to return them to the safety of their colony.
Then there's fish keepers.
"Yeah my female just spawned a whole bunch of eggs, the fry have emerged but the parents are eating them all. Guess i don't need to feed them this week lol"
"Live baby brine shrimp are perfect for feeding fry, and even adults. Super nutritious and great enrichment to let them engage in hunting behaviours"
"These rasboras breed like mad, that's why i have them in a tank with my gourami, they keep the population at bay"
"Lol i have yet to find a creature my puffer fish can't eviscerate in three bites"
Sure there are people like this in all animal keeping hobbies, but comparatively fish keepers dngaf.
Like 5% of reptile keepers will live feed, maybe as high as 10% of ant keepers. But aquarists sit some where like 60-70%, maybe higher.
Just an observation.
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My Journal Entries (post #28)
it's getting bad again, the way I look at myself. The way, I've been checking my body, my stomach looks like a puffer fish.
Food, I've been trying to avoid it for five days, sometimes I give in but then I make myself puke. I literally threw away so much food that was given to me yesterday, My boyfriend was trying to get groceries with me and I just wasn't having it... I only got two things that I might not even eat and tell them I did. Or it will just go bad and I would just say I forgot. I'm back to stress brushing my teeth again but at least I'm getting those calories besides in like a can of soda or none at all. When I look in the mirror I'm fully disgusted with myself. My face is breaking out because of the stress I'm under, I haven't been showering because I'm scared that my hair is going to fizz out. Growing out my nails so I can just clean them, picking scabs because I don't want them on my body. I've been hiding behind a blank face and four extra large hoodies.
I've been thinking slowly to start to just throw away my snacks in my cabinets, food feels like a chore, and the look and the smell make me feel sick. And since I cook mostly for my job, I'm always having pain in my stomach, and no it's not hunger, I lost that three days ago. It's the pain of wanting to just puke my guts out everywhere. This all happened because I stood on the scale five days ago. 187 pounds. I haven’t been that big since 2014 when I use to use food as a coping tool, plus cutting myself. I was 200 pounds at 14. And with my height, this weight that I am right now is really driving me crazy. Every website I've checked told me I'm obese, I've always had issues with my weight since I was a kid because I come from a big family weight-wise. But I was the smallest one out of them because of my fast metabolism, but those comments my family would always make still haunted me because the whole like "where do you put it, your such a little piggy." or "Careful, one day will have to pick you up with a forklift if you keep eating like that." My family literally gave me the "cute" little nickname, human garbage disposal because I use to eat everyone's leftovers. At this time I wasn't even eight yet.
I even hardly ate when I was in the hospital for those three years. Sometimes not by choice, 87 pounds at thirteen I had a feeding tube shoved down my throat when I was ten. I was so weak my legs would always give out on me, so I was in a wheelchair the first year I was there. Speaking of that, my body is even worst today, cold, shaky, and weak in the legs and arms. And god my stomach after making lunch. I’ve been telling everyone that I just can’t go to the bathroom, which is true but now I’m taking so many over-the-counter laxatives. My body is giving out. I’m so disgusted with myself. I’ve always had an off-and-on eating disorder. It was terrible my junior year in high school too, but it couldn't be helped because my sister basically made our childhood home a crack house. No food most of the time, and she forgot I was a picky eater. So when I left I weight around 134ish pounds at seventeen.
It only got worst, hiding food under my bed, in napkins, flushing it down the toilet, and making myself puke in the shower so no one could hear me, or just turning on the sink, I was downing so many diet pills and the longest time I when without eating was almost a whole month. I was extremely skinny at nineteen. Is it wrong that I crave these feelings? I want to put my body through this, I feel like if I can't hurt myself on the outside, losing a couple of pounds on the inside wouldn't be so bad. My biggest habit back then was the gum and water trick. I had almost twenty packages of gum on deck. When I got lunch at work I would just sit in my car and throw the sandwiches and bags of chips in the back seat, and cried the whole 30 minutes and I would hoard them and never eat them until they started to smell then I would throw them away.
I passed out a lot, I was so afraid to step out of the house because I was so far into the illness that even bigger clothes made me feel huge. I was heavily drinking, I had always attracted older people as "friends" even though they were children, but anyways they would always come through if I gave them money for booze and smokes. And for a whole year that was mostly my diet. I wasted money on food just to stare at it or smell it, and then end up throwing it away and crying. I was caught in this lie that I was healthy like I went to the gym three times a week just to run. I miss running, but my passing out was such a high risk that I just started walking a couple of blocks to the grocery store and back, I didn't even need anything it just was the farthest place j2 allowed me to go to.
I miss the sick feeling, I want to drink a cold glass of water with an empty stomach so my whole torso can feel cold, it was like a high. I just want to be skinny again, I know we're in this woke time, but I’m not fully there, I’ve never judged anyone for their weight but I’m super judgmental about my own. If they only knew, everyone has always told me how they were jealous of how skinny I was, if they only knew how I got that way. I was sick, I was mental and it’s crawling its way back inside and I think this time I’m too scared to push it out. I deserve this, for falling basically in love with food again, how dare I get comfortable with food? I never even enjoy the whole concept of eating in general, you work out your jaw, just to feel fully weighted down, and have constant diarrhea. Since my fast metabolism makes it feels like I need to relieve myself after just eating for 10 minutes. I just want to feel good again, and sad to say that I can only feel good about myself when I’m making my body go through this cycle.
ａｓｈｔｏ n ♡
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Any tips on how to help a figure 8 puff come out of his metaphorical shell?
I’ve had meatball for about a month now and he’s a nice and plump little chicken nugget who inhales anything I put in his tank within minutes but the moment I get too close he goes into crazy mode and darts all over the tank :(
(Pictured in his hidey hole, which I’m shocked he let me get this close to)
PLUMP LITTLE CHICKEN NUGGET I LOVE HIMMMM
Honestly- it took Bonk nearly a YEAR to trust me??? And even now he’s a bit of a neurotic, zipping mess (see name…BONK). He does however come up to beg at me and when I have food, which is progress for him now, at two years.
Do you just drop the food in? I tweezer feed mine with a pair of locking hemostats. The lock was super useful when I needed set them in the lid, and walk away to let each of my puffs warm up to eating, and the tweezers themselves. Once they knew tweezers = food, they slowly figured out my face also equals food. Some times. It’s slow going. A month is still pretty new for this guy!
That said, he may just be a nervous nelly? We’ve had five figure eights now (not counting the baby, or the three I got with bonk that didn’t make it), and they really do just have different personalities. My first F8, Feather, was WAY bolder and more social than Bonk. Battle wasn’t a scaredy cat, but he wasn’t always interested in what we were doing either.
I also spend a lot of time just near my tanks, not actively peering (though there’s a lot of that too)
Meanwhile I just dared to make eye contact with Burd the GSP’s tank and now I’m a wanted woman. “HI MOM SEE ME FEED ME HI MOM”
Some of it may be activity level in the room too? Hard to tell. Is he in a high traffic spot?
Dumb question do you wear a lot of orange? We recently learned at least fahaka puffers can see orange and some??? Are afraid of it???
Finnicky little fish, but so worth the effort! I’m sure your buddy will come around. Good luck.
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Brother Dearest Pt 49
“I brought you something I think you will like,” Edie said in Polish with a smile that spread to your face as well in curiosity. From a new suitcase she settled on the table in the living room where she had found you at Eddie’s insistence you stay on the couch and relax that drew you to scoot forward and eye the folded fabric inside the case. “There is a good bit of fabric available in the markets, some less bold than some may care for on a fashion stance, however these will all be quite lovely for what is intended.”
“Intended?” You asked yourself with eyes shifting to Erik carrying a sewing machine table he settled along the wall until a better home for the crafting could be found. “Oh, for my maternity clothes.”
She nodded and said in a show of some sketches she pulled out as well, “I believe these will suit what you had mentioned in your letters. We wore clothes similar to these when working in our gardens in the town we grew up in, both with shorts and long pant legs to suit your needs.” The overall pattern had you look over their every detail to see how you would be able to put them on.
“And how would you secure them?”
To a set of buttons on the front she pointed to the neckline just under the straps with a few that have tie up straps as well with a ribbon above the belly to help support the top. Each which would be forgiving the larger you got and by use of old newspapers patterns were made up that you helped to pin onto the fabrics to cut out while Edie would stitch together. Buttons easily you could add from the supply she had brought. Though each and every shift of the needle through the fabric had your eyes fall on your bare ring finger now too far swollen to force the engagement ring and wedding band that now sat upstairs after a teary failed thought to keep them on your necklace weeks prior. Nearly four months gone and about a half of what a single baby carrying mother would be the size of, far from large and still it seemed your body wanted to play puffer fish once given the excuse to after years of starvation and exhaustion.
Edie having caught your stare on her way to add another pair to the pile on the table said with a kind smile, “Swollen fingers are a common symptom.”
That had you look up and shake your head with a smile, “I know. Norma and Dawn both wore theirs on a chain.” To the drop of a tear down your cheek you fanned your face mid giggle with a folded bit of the pattern beside you, “Ugh, crocodile tears.”
She shook her head and said, “Not bad tears at all. The changes are hard to adjust to. When is the Doctor coming?”
“Oh, he has some patients and such and will see me after the New Years.” Teddy mid giggle tottered through the room making you bring the pair with the needle still in it close to your chest and away from him, “Ooh, careful,” you said eyeing his path with Olive and Pepper after him. Whiskers however came in next to hop up beside you avoiding the chill that came in from James and Victor’s return. Norma had joined Dawn in their day with her family while Eddie focused on the paper. Between the brothers however your eyes fell on David in his bashful smile of an entrance to the sound of Erik’s chuckle to Teddy’s finding him in his turn to hide. “Hey David.”
“Hello. How is our lovely invalid.” That had you scoff and him chuckle, “I kid.” Timidly he came closer and asked, “I hope you don’t mind I was a bit curious once I heard you are carrying three babies. How are you feeling?”
“Oh,” you let out a breath, “Not bad. Hungry, always, and I sleep like a bear as much as I can. When the room doesn’t flip on me that is.” He gestured his hand to your side and you nodded moving a set of the patterns to Edie’s gentle acceptance of the pair in your hands to finish that button to Victor’s lift of one of the completed pairs of overall shorts.
David said to his glance at your belly, “Your babies seem to be growing well.”
“Yes,” you said in a settle of your hands on top of the belly visible in the settle of your hands on top of your sweater that had helped to mask its full size at least a little. “Certainly growing while I puff up like a scared cat.”
To that he smirked and accepted your settle of his hand on your belly he’d been afraid to touch that widened in the feel of just how round it was. “No movement yet?”
“Not yet, thought there was a kick yesterday but then my stomach made this awful gurgle noise.”
James chuckled to Victor’s stating, “Then we had to open a window as the stew we made came back with a vengeance. Last time we risk basil for Pipsqueak.”
“I said I was sorry,” you said and he shook his head mid chuckle to James’ settle beside you on the couch.
James said with a smile, “No apologies, been meaning to scrub the tile in that bathroom for a while now. Usually it’s Vic that gets sick in there.”
“It smelled so good too, which is the weird part.” You said and glanced at David who had a puzzled look on his face in a reach for your wrist which showed you didn’t have a pulse. “Sorry, ya, it’s one of my, things, Doctors can’t hear my heartbeat or lungs or the babies unless I link minds with them. Don’t know why.”
In the meet of your eyes a ring of silver flashed in his to match the silver dots in yours and his eyes lowered to your wrist now at the feel of the pulse and trio of heartbeats he heard through his contact with your belly. To a disbelieving scoff he looked up again to catch your eye in the dim of the ring of silver in his eyes and the spots in yours. “You are a marvel.” That had you grin and settle your hands on your belly and follow his gaze to the next pair of long pants pair of overalls. “What are those?”
“Pants I can wear instead of a tent.” That had him smirk your way and you said, “At this rate I’d need something huge to cover my belly and the skirts no doubt would get caught or folded up and flash my backside each time I stand up if they fold the wrong way.” To that he chuckled and settled in to the accepted social break to spice up your day in the first week so far that the town had been limiting to one or two visits a day in turns having all been filled in just how pregnant and likely to need of rest you were. “Plus the shorts should help in the late spring when it gets warm.”
David, “Well I am certain that you will be amply comfy in them.”
“Yes, and if the other ladies have a problem with it I’ll just start to cry and they will feel bad and never bring it up again.” You teased making the group chuckle in relief at your good mood. Daisy soon enough came to tag along on David’s visit and also drove him back to his office in time for his next appointment with ample news to pass on through the town of your high spirits in your cozy abode to wait out the next round of snow that was on its way by morning.
.
Alone now in the living room to the side you shifted with pillows adjusted for comfort and sighs galore on another glance to the stack of books you had finished from the daily supply our of the crate they had bought from second hand shop in Alberta they had been rationed to keep you distracted. Within ten minutes however on the way back from a bathroom break James in his arrival to feed the fire spotted you mid pace with hands on your hips from one end of the room to the next to simply have some movement for this cramped up day. “Restless or do you need a back rub?” He hummed in the bend to toss another couple logs on the fire from the log room they had stocked the day they had arrived.
“Oh,” you sighed out in another turn towards his end of the room, “Little bit of both.” That had him chuckle and smile to the slight blush on your cheeks. Still a bit embarrassed from the fumble of a try to be intimate the night before you’d ended up flustered and just curled up in his arms after the sensitive gag reflex of yours had struck again in a try to pay your ever so attentive husband some well deserved amorous attentions that shot that dead right there in almost getting sick on him.
Right up to you he strolled and across your back in his stop in your path he hummed, “I love you, let me rub your back.”
“You always rub my back,” you just about whined making him chuckle again.
And he leaned in to press his lips to your forehead that was next met by his, “And I will rub it again, as often as you like until my hands fall off and have to grow back and then I will rub it again. And as far as your attentions to me I love you and babies can make our nights in a bit awkward but never less than spectacular each time.”
Your head pulled back and you said, “I almost got sick on you last night.”
“And it was spectacular,” that had you roll your eyes and he hugged you to his chest with a kiss to the top of your head, “I got to hold you all night, pretty spectacular on its own just to be yours. The impossible love of mine who is growing our babies. How could I ever not love a moment with you?” He kissed your forehead again then stepped back, “Which reminds me.” Your brow arched up and to the mantle he went where you eyed the ring box he carried back to you.
Your lips parted as you said, “James you did not buy me jewelry!”
Lowly he chuckled and opened the box that had you gasp, “My wife cannot wear her wedding rings and is very upset about that.”
“James I’m a puffer fish!” you said with eyes on his again.
He shook his head, “No you are not. And these are sized for your finger now.” You huffed and could only watch his lift of your hand to glide the eternity band of diamond sideways hearts in white gold settings that sat perfectly at the base of the finger with the new engagement ring on after. The latter that had a large rectangular diamond surrounded by two square diamonds on a white gold band which settled next in an awe strike of a pair you didn’t expect. When your eyes met again he’d lifted the hand to kiss the knuckles beside the new duo and he said, “It hurt you not being able to wear your rings. Got you these when I saw your difficulty with your rings last month.”
“Last month?”
He nodded and said with a smile, “And I even dropped them by Father Thomas, he loved the chance to bless the rings for us so you can have a symbol of our marriage you won’t have to wear around your neck. So no tears or arguments.” He said in a stroke of his thumbs across your cheeks to wipe away the tears that had fallen after having tossed the box to one of the chairs, “Because if your fingers do grow again I’ll just buy another set.”
Laced with a sniffle you chuckled and reached up to cup his cheeks for a kiss he melted into completely ignorant of the tears that fell over his thumbs and end of his nose in the lingered first kiss and five hungry pecks afterwards that broke in his chuckle and move to wipe your cheeks again. “Now, let’s rub your back,” he said guiding you to the couch where he settled you comfortably sideways and carefully settled behind you, careful not to bother your back with a heavy plop. And in the gentle start to a backrub where he asked, “Do you like the rings? Apparently it is much harder than it is here to have jewelers in New York to design rings how you want them.”
That had you chuckle and say, “No, they like to keep a hard hand on the diamonds thanks to what they have to pay to keep them safe in the shops.” That had his eyes on you and you giggled, “The big Italian families mainly control diamonds. How much they charge you?”
“Seemed they wanted to charge me more till one of the old guys in the back said something to the salesman.”
“Ah, you must have gone to Grigor’s then.” His brow arched up and you said, “Mom treated his son in the hospital, kept the Doctors from ignoring one of his symptoms that could have killed him and he let her pick a pair of earrings as thanks. He likes to wave when I go by and ask how I am, always has since I started to head to museums alone.”
“How’s his son?”
“Down in Spain? I think, or Jamaica, required a tropical climate for his lungs. Has five kids though his wife just moved back last spring to be with her parents so he’s happy to meet the brood.”
“He must be upset to be away from his kids and wife.”
“Eh,” you said with a tilt of your head that had his hands pause to adjust again, “Not very. From what I hear he’s got a bit of a harem and she stuck it out until she could raise funds to fly home. Whispers are he caught something in his harem and he’s not got long.”
“See, brothels never mean well,” making you grin to yourself and steal another peek at the rings. “So was that a no that you don’t like the rings?”
“The rings are beautiful. Thank you.”
“Almost got laughed out of the shop for the hearts till the old man stepped in.”
“Yes, ovals or tears are more common as rare shapes nowadays. Rarely hear of hearts.”
Erik with a poke of his head in the room asked, “Did you want your pear now, Bunny?”
“Sure,” he nodded and popped out to come back with a pear in hand and smile eyeing your new rings above your belly you were stroking again. “Thank you,” you said in accepting the pear while he sat down and claimed your left hand.
“Very lovely choices. And impressive to show off when you get back to school.”
“Oh yes, may just distract from my belly. Be the size of a hippo soon enough.”
Erik shushed you and gave your belly a gentle stroke, “Don’t you worry on that you just keep growing little ones. Nice and healthy until it’s time for us to hold you and give your brave mother a good rest.”
All you could do was smile and lift the pear for a bite that had his smile grow in the clear elated change to the trio who soaked in all they could from the treasured fruit that was fueling their health as well as their mother’s.
.
“Hello sister,” Venom said on your easy stroll down the cold steps with hand on your belly in a hope for some cocoa and a grilled cheese to lull you back to sleep. On his next stroll across the room he had been pacing from side to side on you took notice of Marigold in his palm laid against his chest clearly in a means to let her parents rest from her usual fussy manner.
“Hello Venom, Goldie not sleeping again?” You asked releasing the stair railing to enter the warm room lit by the fire he had been feeding to keep the house warm for the animals and the usual nightly pacing you now had joined in on.
“Our little one is merely growing. The quiet winter has done her good.” He said in a turn to join you to the kitchen. “How are sister’s little ones?”
“Good, heartbeats are strong, they feel to be growing. No movement yet. Can you hear them too?”
“Venom can feel them,” he said with eyes that met yours in a glance up from the kettle you were filling. “Similar to how you feel heartbeats. They are why Venom cannot crawl on his Sister as he used to, would only cause them pain. For now Venom will ensure none harm his Sister and her little ones.”
“According to Elliot and Herc I could still blast some people a few hundred yards away if need be. And if I could urge myself to.”
Lowly Venom chuckled and replied, “Fear is a worthy hindrance with little ones. You are strong even in your fears.” Softly you sighed in a move to set the kettle on the burner you switched on for it. “However we do not carry the little ones. Far easier for us to say fear is worthy when a Mother’s fear is insurmountable.” Your eyes met his in your move to gather the bread, cheese and butter to go with the skillet you lowered from the hook it hung from to the cool burner for when the kettle was through boiling. “Your fear could cripple others, your pain could drive others to madness and despair. Venom has the best Sister, and her little ones will have the best mother. Eddie has shown Venom how Sister was mothered before Sarah grew sick and our Teddy is proof mothering is natural to you.”
“Still have to get the trio ready to be mothered. Have you read midwife manuals?”
“Sister is no fleshling. This birth will be the hardest merely for fear. We are here. Venom will help with any pain once the little ones are born.”
“There’s no medicine they can give me that could do more than a second of relief.”
“Pain is always there. We cannot protect Sister from pain. But Venom will be here with Eddie at your side. Sister saved our son we will protect your daughters.”
To his words your hands smoothed over your belly asking, “They do sound like girls don’t they? Fast heartbeats.”
James’ voice in his entrance however turned your head to his smiling self looking you over in his sweater, baggy flannels and thick fuzzy socks in your moccasin slippers with hair halfway slipped from the braid he helped you with hours prior. “Good, more girls the merrier.”
From the door he came over and sweetly pressed a kiss to your lips in a single move trading the kettle for the skillet to handle the grilled cheese for you. “Do you want some cocoa? I didn’t mean to wake you.”
“You didn’t. Vic is on the roof making goat noises again,” that had you giggle and he said, “Cocoa would be lovely, thank you,” he said watching you mix up the cocoa powder and water that you added some milk to even the taste out then stared at the empty spot where the marshmallows usually sat in one of the cupboards. “Vic bought more marshmallows two days ago. Should be in there.”
Instead of the marshmallows you eyed the new pack of gravy mix that turned you to the pantry for the duo to watch your search end with a trade of the mix and a new bag of marshmallows. “Guess Petal distracted Kitty.” The corner was split and an amusing amount was added to both mugs after the second confirming glance that Venom did not want mug himself but did accept a couple marshmallows you floated his way he snapped up then kissed his daughter’s head in her grumble to the jerk of the muscle under her head.
James while you clipped the bag and put it back in its proper home asked, “Any thoughts for names yet?”
“Not any traditional ones,” you said after a brief sip on the drink that had you put a hand on the counter to the same feel of another small flutter you felt to the trio’s heartbeats changing as they do every meal to soak up more nutrients to grow stronger.
“My Xander was named after King Alexander, Vic pulled names from records we read on Spartan Queens and Kings. The world all got the big filmed wedding broadcast all around the world, screw the whispers traditional is out the window. What names did you want? I know you’ve already picked full names.”
Venom said, “At least share the inspiration, surely the stars will whisper their names into infamy.”
“I actually picked star inspired names.”
James smiled as the bread toasted in the buttered skillet, “Even better, spill, three names. Go.”
“Aurora Nyx,”
James, “Ooh, love it already. Next name?”
“Belinda Rhea.”
Venom, “Both stunning views Venom passed to find Eddie.”
You nodded and said in James’ glance your way to encourage you to continue, “Nova Carina.”
James, “Perfect names.”
You nodded then said, “I also like Rigel Nash,” you said making him smirk at the clear boy’s name. “Just in case.”
To himself he chuckled in your next sip then hummed, “All incredible names, girls or boys they will be more than treasured.”
You nodded then asked, “For last names?”
“Pear Howlett,” he answered without a pause then glanced your way in turning the sandwich over, “The family name. Vic is going flowers for their girls as is Dawn and Eddie so let’s go stars for our munchkins.” One sandwich was finished followed by another that you ate and finished off with your cocoa before it was time to head back upstairs to the bed still warmed by the fire James had fed on his way down to find his cuddle partner who had gone missing while he slept.
.
1948. New Years came with a crash, literally, from your hand the mug you had intended to fill with tea fell to the floor and shattered to pieces. Loudly Teddy gasped and his hands at his sides rose in terrified fists to your hunch forward. From the table a chair slid over by your mental pull and both knees settled on the seat to the child’s call, “Daddy!!” Forward onto the back of the chair you leaned with forehead on the hands clutching the wood to ground yourself while the men already on their feet by the break of the mug raced to the kitchen.
Once in the doorway they saw you lost to the sudden shift that you felt of the room that required you to get off your feet as soon as possible. “My Bunny?” Teddy whimpered in a pat of his hands on your bent leg closest to him that had your hand lower to land on his hands for a comforting pat.
“I’m ok, Teddy.” You panted out.
“Jaqi?” James murmured in his ease behind you while Victor got to picking up the mug pieces Teddy had stepped around. His hand however on your side with the hand from the pat on Teddy’s yours moved it to the now actively shifting belly that dropped his jaw. “They’re kicking!” he exclaimed with tears pooling into his eyes mid spread of his ridiculous grin in his second hand moving to your belly.
“Kicking,” you sighed out and lifted your head to hold onto the chair in the lift of your head with an eye roll to follow. “Full on attack at once,” you added in Eddie’s teary eyed crouch to lift Teddy to help his toe top failed reach for your belly.
Erik now in the room moved to the oven saying at the whistle of the kettle, “I’ll fix up your tea, Bunny.”
Dawn and Norma followed Edie to join the others who circled around you with turns in placing their hands for feels of the active belly that was enough a shock to put you off balance. “Thank you Erik,” to the table James and Victor carried the chair you were on and helped you to turn around and settle in until the snack they fixed up for you was completed then you were moved back to the couch once you had steadied in their relax again.
In all the excitement to the best of your abilities Teddy was filled in to how the babies you were carrying now that they were big enough had chosen to stretch at once in a move that had made you a bit off balance. That however had his brows adorably furrow and in a glare and point to your belly he said to your girls, “You be nice to my Bunny. Or you’ll be in big trouble.”
Up into your side you lifted him for a welcome nestling hug and kiss to his forehead as you said, “Thank you Teddy Bear,” to the others’ wide adoring smiles in the moment that Victor captured with your camera.
.
Morning came soon enough with noon shortly after in the middle of another flurry that had both brothers off in town helping alongside Eddie some of the older neighbors to finish some minor repairs. Both Norma and Dawn however were tucked in bed with their much needed naps. The girls were mid lunch handled by Erik and Edie while you sat cross legged on the rug building a castle of blocks with Teddy who giggled the higher the structure began to grow. “We need a hat!”
Teddy exclaimed and you giggled in asking, “Hat?”
He nodded and pointed to the top of the tower on the side, “King’s house had a hat.”
“Oh, a flag. There’s some paper in the library I’ll fold us up a flag.”
He nodded and tottered off with Olive right behind him in her usual habit of shadowing the boy when on his own and your eyes turned towards the door that Victor entered, shivered and stomped with eyes cast your way once certain the door was sealed shut again to not let out too much heat. “Hey Pipsqueak, you’re on the floor.”
“We’re building a castle, Teddy is fetching paper for a flag.” You said to his strip from his outer snow protective layer that left him in trousers and a button down shirt once his snowy things were hung up.
“Well every castle needs a flag,” he hummed on his way over to sit beside you with smile spreading in a subtle scoop of the camera along the way to snap a picture of you sat down beside the castle that you giggled in notice of his plan that granted him a wide smile for the captured moment. “This’ll be among my favorites.” With legs crossed he plopped down beside you and watched teddy walk back with the paper from his coloring cubby with the dog behind him with bucket of supplies dangling from her mouth.
“Kitty! We need a hat!”
“Flag,” you again repeated and the boy nodded and again said, “hat,” that had you and Victor chuckle and you asked in settling the paper out beside the bucket Olive put down to hop up and lay out on the couch again beside her daughter Pepper still lost to her nap.
“What do you want on the flag?”
Various flags between the three of you were folded up and colored then placed atop the castle, all of which that slid close to falling off when James came home that had the momentary scowling boy stand up and smile mid shout of, “Unc Jim come make a hat!”
James smiled mid strip and once his clothes were hung up he came to join you all and post sweet kiss on your cheek he leaned in to join in on the fun that Teddy, now on his lap was guiding him through. Until his own flag was added. Lunch called and Victor lifted the boy while James helped to keep you steady in the unfold of your legs to climb from your knees up on your feet again.
.
Weeks of snow and in the break of 1948 came on the cusp of a fireplace smoldering with the end of needed firewood to warm the cabin that now was packed up for the long drive back again. Erik excitedly was back to finish his final semester in his high school with Edie planned ahead to head back to the market and get more material to make more of the outfits to add to your supply she would mail to you in Brooklyn. Just a whiff of some herbs and sauces in the drive back through the Italian block signaled a mental warning to the other cars to turn and stop to get something to eat before the final few blocks to the unlock of your home.
“Bunny Howler, sight for sore eyes Happy New Year.” Vinny Tortelli said upon your entrance into the warm eatery with his family scattered in a couple of the booths who turned their heads to nod in welcome to the surprising guests.
“Happy New Year,” you said and flashed a smile to his aunt and grandmother who came to the counter with spreading curious smiles of their own. “I know it’s close to closing.”
Vinny shook his head as his grandmother shook her head and ushered you inside in a path around the counter, “You all come in with those babies out of the cold and eat our food.”
Vinny’s cousin said, “We’re open another few hours anyways our food delivery for next week is running late.”
Outer coats were hung on the hooks around the large curved booth you were taken to and following a chuckle the shift of your sweater that folded a bit around your belly that had Vinny say, “I see someone’s been productive.” That turned your head and he gestured to your belly in your scoot aside to let James sit on the end of the booth, “Won’t be long before you can’t hide that bump when it warms up.”
Softly you chuckled and rested your hands on the table with fingers around the menu that drew his eyes to your new rings as you answered, “You have no idea. Barely halfway and I’ve puffed up nearly to put some full term women to shame.”
He smirked and asked, “I take it that explains the diamonds too? Heard you were up for a new gift with some sparkle.”
In a half smirking glance at James you said, “James’ idea to make me feel better on my others not fitting.”
Vinny chuckled as his grandmother now returned with some fresh breadstick baskets she eased between the couples at the table and said, “I knew those papers were trash. Who would trust a frog over strong genes. Snack on these and we will feed you and your growing baby, sure to be big one.”
You smirked and after a skim of the menu gave your order with the others as Vinny chatted with you all about the stories and what Eddie’s plans were concerning the stories the Daily Bugle could run about your change. Food however had the company to focus on their family and business at the sight of the truck that drove around the block to get to the back alley that they stood to help unload. Large servings and a helping of desserts with a paid bill later and off to your home you went for a welcome end to the trip.
In through the garage everyone unloaded the truck and cars into the lit and warming up house by everyone but you in your nest in the living room with the napping babies and pets. With the puppies and Mr Whiskers however you made your way up to your floor to simply take off your boots and get some sleep.
.
“Bunny!” Ambrose said with a smile wide in her hurry to close the distance between you in the morning drop in by the whole brood.
Gina however joined her in saying, “Off your feet! We found you a few nice dress patterns for Mass we want you to pick from.” Hours the family soaked up all they could and helped to plan what you might want for a nursery as they were all trying to think up ways they cold help on those grounds. Each kick between snacks had groups of hands on your belly until the time when you would be bundled up for the Wednesday Mass that would break you back into the pattern again. For now at least a wrap dress that Gina had made to fit for you from one of her old dresses to tide you over underneath a warm sweater and jacket helped to disguise the belly that Father Thomas took all that it had in him to not shout the change in your life that other former mothers had already guessed. Just your face alone that had given the change away with the new larger rings to drive the assumption home.
Mr Maisey however, father to three sets of triplets, was the one to break the ice and topic and caught you on your way to take communion. Just one look and he had a knowing smirk on his face in saying, “This is so familiar.”
His eyes shifted to James’ over your head, which wasn’t hard to do before but was even more so at your reluctance to wear heels since the kicking began to lessen chances of tumbles. In a chuckle James simply admitted to what was already known, “Triplets.”
Mr Maisey in a deep throated chuckle nodded and said to you, “Our youngest have a cold, but next week I’ll send the Missus round to pass over some pointers. Not that you need them for when they’re here, you’re the only one who was able to grant us nights off when they were fresh at home.”
“Thank you. Any tips would be helpful and she’s the only one to know the stakes.”
His grin spread and he said, “And don’t worry about the stories they tell you about needing a cut to have your babies. Had two sets born on their own and the last set took a cut merely because they tried to make it last a week on us and the older six at home were giving their gramps hell when we were gone.”
That had you giggle remembering that was how you were hired by the elderly man on edge who needed some backup of his own having seen at Mass and in town how you had helped with the younger Brocks since your adoption into the brood. “Yes, I remember how unruly they tried to be. Hopefully I can have a good birth, easy is out the window, but so far everything seems to be going well.”
“That’s good,” he said having taken notice of Mrs Cahn behind you who in a clear sign of withholding a secret and a smile tucked her lower lip between her teeth until she could pass on through her knitting circle just what and to whom you were talking about. Everyone had been up in arms over the story and with little to sue for from the leak in the lab of your exam it seemed to the town that there would be no justice in this for the woman whose reputation had been scuffed. Yet now evidently pregnant and so with triplets no less was a huge bitten thumb towards the Times for their story now that was publicly to be known to weigh less than the paper it was printed on.
He turned to Father Thomas however at the front of the line and in kneeling accepted his communion while his eldest six children on his left accepted from the younger Priest in training that handled all the children’s communion. James was next accepting in a trade of wide knowing smiles through his bend to the cushioned bench with lips parting for the communion wafer that they closed around to the Father’s hushed murmur. Up he rose in a cross of himself and stepped aside with eyes on you ready to help you down and up only to see the Father say with a smile, “You may stand.” Softly you chuckled to yourself and stepped up to the bench to accept the wafer and smile around it trying not to cry in his saying, “Congratulations. Truly a blessing and an answer to so very many prayers.”
All you could do was smile and turn in a cross of yourself. Stepping aside to let Eddie take his turn as you joined Victor to the side where he held Teddy and Marigold for Dawn and Eddie while Norma spoke to Ambrose about plans for your next appointment this weekend when she would come by again to continue sharing this experience with you.
Pt 50
#James Howlett x Reader OC#Victor Creed x Norma Jeane#Eddie Brock x OC#Erik and Edie#Teddy Brock#Marigold Dove Pear#Time in Canada#Nesting Period#Pregnancy Awkwardness#Family Time#New Gifts#Back to Brooklyn#Dinner with the Tortelli Family#Spread the News#Meeting the Maisey's
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Being a Conscientious Fish Collector
[I had this in my drafts back from when I was updating this blog normally - around 2015 - but I think it’s worth releasing as I gear up for writing articles on fishes in each state... food for thought if you are considering collecting fish yourself!]
There’s been some controversy about whether it’s ethically (and environmentally) alright to collect native fish in your area for keeping. There are good arguments for and against, assuredly, but this article will act like a checklist for whether or not you should even consider it. So if you feel like you want to start up that native Tennessee biotope that you’ve always wanted, take a look through this first. If you can’t honestly say “Yes” to every one of these questions, don’t go out looking to collect fish yourself. It’s that simple.
1. Do you live in an area where it’s legal to catch and keep live fish? Let’s start with the big one first. Unfortunately, not every state or country allows for the keeping of live fish. Last I looked, AZ, CA, ME, NE, ND, NV, VT, WI, and WY are all outright “no”s. Sorry, but rules are rules. You’ll want to check even if I didn’t mention your state above because laws are subject to change, after all, and what might be okay while writing this may not always be the norm.
2. Is it otherwise legal for you to be collecting fish? Some states require permits for fish catching, some only grant this ability to scientific institutes, most all require valid fishing licenses. For whatever reason, Minnesota only allows keeping if you’re under the age of 17. But bottom line is this: even if you live in a state which allows for capture, there might be another reason you can’t. Know the laws, ask for help from somebody professional if needed, but don’t collect if you’re not allowed to.
3. Do you know what species are native to your area? This may seem like a broad point but it’s actually important because there may be multiple species living in an area which may be similar in appearance but varied in legal standing. Darters and Madtoms are such instances of many different species living in an area with some being unprotected, some being endangered, and some being critically endangered. Last thing you want to do is unknowingly capture something endangered (and protected!) because it looked a bit like the common species you are looking for.
4. Do you have a good understanding of the species you are planning to find? This goes along with the previous point. For whatever species you are looking for, you should be able to tell it apart from other native animals, know what water quality it needs (pH/hardness ranges, specific gravity if applicable, temperature), general temperament, feeding preferences, maximum size, and other such criteria. The US is lovely in that we have areas which may be acidic or basic, fresh or salt (or brackish!), and may be temperate to tropical. You also need to be able to feed these animals and some have quirks. Do your research beforehand, and ask questions first if you need to.
5. Do you have the proper means to catch the species in question? Depending on where you live, time of year, desired species, etc., you may only be able to legally keep fish caught in a certain manner. For sport fish, this usually means rod and reel. Any smaller specimens caught with a minnow trap or a seine will have to be returned unharmed. And yes, this does mean that some species have to be a certain size in order to keep. Know. The. Laws.
6. Is the IUCN Red List Status of the species “Least Concern”? First of all, you don’t want to catch any threatened fish, regardless of whether or not it was hypothetically legal (unless you were part of a scientific organization tasked to research). People in general have done a lot of harm catching animals that were already part of an unstable population and we aquarists need to endeavor not to harm any environment. Besides the fact is it’s illegal to harvest endangered animals. Just don’t do it. It’s a grey area about “Near Threatened” species, but you should still avoid them. Stick to those species which have very stable populations and are not protected (and keep in mind! Just because it’s LC overall doesn’t mean it might not be endangered where you live. Always verify!)
7. Is the species overall suited for captive life? Sorry to say, not all fish and aquatic inverts make good residents in the home aquarium. Bivalves are the typical poster child for faring poorly in captivity (minus a few exceptions). But even with typically hardy fish like Topminnows (family Fundulidae), not all are great choices. Some people report that the Lined Topminnow (Fundulus lineolatus) does not really adapt well to captivity. Compare that the closely related Mummichog (F. heteroclitus) which is much better suited - if you have the choice, it might be worth leaning towards the easier option.
8. Are you at an experience level which is suited for these animals? While it’s no surprise that brackish and marine keeping is more advanced than freshwater, there’s even a bit of disparity between the freshwater species. Darters are such finnicky eaters, for example, that they have to be fed live or frozen foods in special manners (usually by hand or turkey baster) to avoid starvation. Madtoms are nocturnal and will starve if all the food for them is set out during the day with things like minnows and livebearers competing for food. So the main concern here is are you actually able to care for animals that may have quirks that have prevented them from becoming staples in the trade? And be (brutally) honest with yourself here. Animal lives depend on it.
9. Do you have a tank which can handle these fish for their entire life? Finding homes for fish which are present in the trade (Mexican Tetras, Texas Cichlids, Florida Flagfish) may not be difficult if they are no longer suited for your set ups. How many people can truly care for that Bowfin you picked up AND are willing to take it? Whenever you catch a native fish, you are signing a contract to care for this animal for it’s entire life. A native fishkeeping club may be able to help you rehome but this is something you should not rely on. And under no circumstances should you ever release a fish into the wild. Doing so could release non-native pathogens which could put ecosystems at risk. (Note that this question includes not only tank size but also tank mates. A 200 gallon tank is certainly big enough for even the biggest of Sleeper Gobies, but if you put it with a nippy Triggerfish, Burrfish, Boxfish, or Puffer, then that animal is not going to live a long or happy life).
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Extreme shippers are still around rehashing lies and blurry photos because they can’t admit they were wrong all along. At this point every point made to show SC are together is beyond ridiculous. It’s embarrassing.
Wednesday, April 10, 2019 (1817 Standard Outlander Time)
Dear “Anonymous” 😎,
You know what’s serendipitous?
Your submission arrived while I’ve been enjoying early-days SC shipping memories, so instead of ignoring your message — which is what I usually do with rants, not wanting to feed the beast — I’m going to respond like boyneriver might have back in the day. Nostalgia is fun!
Hey, any chance you’re tvuckic’s frequent flyer Anon? I’m wondering if the comment I left on her blog today put me on your radar?
@tvuckic Your they’re-not-together Anons seem to have serious crushes on you. Despite your clearly presented, logical explanations, they can’t help themselves from returning time after time to ask the same question or make the same point. I wonder if they pin a screenshot of your blog header on their mirror? 🤔
You know what’s beyond ridiculous and embarrassing?
You and your compatriots who think in black & white terms, who lack imagination, and who are compelled to tell people what they’re doing is wrong…
YOUR compulsion to lecture and tattle is what’s beyond ridiculous and embarrassing.
Grade 3, in my country 😃
Believe what you want. If you accept the engagement as presented, if you accept the single-man-about-town or girlfriend-du-jour as presented, if you think everything you read is honest and/or correct, if you think people don’t fake aspects of their lives, if you think what you think is right, yay you. 🎉
I believe what I want. I don’t accept the engagement as presented. I don’t accept the single-man-about-town or girlfriend-du-jour as presented. I KNOW some things I read are not honest or correct (because I write and do PR for a living). I KNOW people fake aspects of their lives (duh). I often think what I think is right, but usually leave room for doubt, yay me. 🎉
You know what’s perfectly acceptable?
Shipping couples. Go figure. I never heard the term until I discovered this cesspool of humanity Tumblr in 2016, but I’d been shipping couples since the 60s when I thought my Barbie looked cuter with my cousin’s Ken than her Barbie did, so I would switch our Kens when my cousin wasn’t looking. In the 70s I thought David Cassidy and Susan Dey made a great couple, despite their playing siblings in The Partridge Family (AND their denying any romantic relationship… sound familiar?).
Personally, I ship SC on Tumblr and in private conversations with friends. I don’t ship on any other social media platform, nor do I contact anyone on the Sony, Lionsgate, Starz, or Tall Ships payrolls. In other words, I keep it in my own lane. What and whom I ship is nobody’s business but mine.
If you — or anyone else outside of my friends and followers — know I ship SC, it’s because you’ve chosen to read my blog or my comments on other blogs. That doesn’t make it your business.
You know what’s sad?
For the most part I try to portray my Little Marjie Sunshine side on my blog, but privately, some of my Tumblr friends witness my dark side. If you need to deliver your sad tidings of killjoy to a stranger’s Inbox because you have no friends who share your views or who are willing to listen, that’s sad.
You know what’s funny?
You’re not as anonymous as you think loser. Go Fish.
I don’t endorse or enjoy lots of stuff presented on Tumblr blogs. AND… I don’t visit those blogs to chastise the bloggers, or tattle on them to strangers. Maybe you could follow my lead? After all, you brought your thoughts to my attention; you must be interested in what I think.
Open your mind, dear “Anon.” Make room for possibilities…
Slàinte!
boyneriver-fraser, BS, MS, PhD, lots of shady trees 🛶
Inbox Message: #17 │Received: 041019 │Answered: 041019
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The Big ONE
Photos by Daniel Ortiz
I always think my party ideas for the kids are so original until I start looking for items for them and find a million parties done in the same theme. Our son’s first birthday was no exception, but I like to think we put it all together in a creative way you haven’t seen yet... Reeling in the Big ONE!
Our little guy turned the big ONE and we had the best time celebrating with a fishing themed party. Keep reading and scrolling for ALL of the details with photos by Daniel Ortiz .
Fishing bobbers, nets, lures (keep out of reach of little hands because the hooks are sharp!), lanterns, and cattails all came to mind immediately as I gathered decorations for the party. “We’re reeling in the big ONE” read the invite. A comprehensive list of the items will be at the bottom of this post, but I also linked the ones I refer to in the body of the post like the fish food tents above.
PHOTO OPP
A photo spot with bobbers and nets formed in my brain as I pinned ideas, and the variations of those came together to create this one I’m so proud of below! My husband assembled scrap 2x4s we had that were painted grey into the photo frame.
The bobbers on the photo spot (pictured below) are paper lanterns we spray painted red on the bottom half (painters tape used to make the line) and the top (linking the paper lanterns). There’s pretend fish hanging below the bobbers on the left strung with fishing line.
And, the directional arrows pointing toward “fishing hole”, “weighing station”, “bait and tackle”, and “catch of the day” were cut by our friend and I drew the words and art on with paint markers. (pictured below)
ONE
My mom and her crafty skills is always a part of making these parties a reality and she helped put the finishing touches on the “ONE” for the picture table. I love how it turned out! We used styrofoam letters (”O”, “N”, “E” each linked), cut out one for the boats from the invitation for the “N”, and glued cardstock paper in red, white, blue and green to the letters. The blue waves we cut out in different colors and there is twine wrapped around the “E” and the cattails.
We also had to secure the letters to the backdrop (tape was sufficient) since they are styrofoam and could easily fall over.
MONTHS
Each of the months (on paper bobbers from newborn to one) just HAD to be displayed on a net, so figuring out how to secure them was a challenge we solved by hot glueing small clothespins to the back of the flat paper bobbers and taping pennies to the back of the pictures to attempt to keep them all from blowing up when the wind blew.
The wind had other ideas, but it looked good throughout the party.
The red lanterns, net, fishing lures, small fishing bobbers, and cups are all linked. Click on the words to shop them. And, the tackle box on the table was a Houston Nutcracker Market find.
TIME CAPSULE
We also decided to do a time capsule (directions in the frame on the left in the photo above) at our guy’s 1st birthday. I regretted not doing one for our daughter’s first birthday after my mother-in-law passed shortly after the party. Each person in attendance can write a message to the birthday kiddo and answer some fun questions about what they think the child will be and like, etc. Your child can read all of the messages when they turn 18!
What I’d give for a message from my mother-in-law for our daughter to read when she’s older.
FISHING SHIRT
For our big guy’s outfit, I found an adorable baby fishing shirt onesie for our birthday boy to wear for his party. Even if you’re not doing a fishing themed party, this shirt was so cute on him!
Our nanny made the balloon 1 with fishing line and balloons pictured above. Linked the balloons we purchased here. We went for a slight ombre effect with more light blue on the top and dark blue on the bottom. (Would recommend buying a couple of packs to ensure you have enough of each color)
FISHING THEMED FOOD
Galvanized buckets were the perfect serving piece for the food along with fishing related food items, like gummy worms labeled as “worms”, Twizzlers as “fishing line”, Swedish Fish, Goldfish, peach rings as “Life Preservers” and pretzel sticks as “fishing rods”. The pretend fish decorating the tables are foam (squishy is the best way I can describe them) but really good looking and linked here.
I also saw the puffer fish idea online and thought it would be fun for the kids to have the punch balloons to play with. And, I was a bit nostalgic thinking back to playing with punch balloons as a kid. Obviously, one year olds weren’t doing much balloon punching, but they were fun for older kids.
The wooden boat and boxes on the food table were borrowed from a friend, but the white 1 was purchased online. Also borrowed fishing poles that were used throughout the party.
ACTIVITIES
Along with puffer fish punch balloons, we had a “Catch and Release” activity where we put water in a kiddie pool with fish in it and fishing poles (magnets on the poles and fish connect the two) where kids could attempt to catch fish. And, our “Feed the Fish” station was a bean bag toss which has now been repainted for a third time to have fish swimming.
The printables I used for the activity signs & favors are here:
Bait Bar
Thank You for Making my Birthday Reel Fun
Catch and Release (couldn’t find this one so I used my own skills to make one)
Feed the Fish (couldn’t find this one so I used my own skills to make one)
CUPCAKES
When it comes to kids and cake, I’ve become a big believer in cupcakes being the easiest all around. They don’t have to be cut, don’t require a fork or spoon, and are cost effective. So, this time I did store cupcakes from our Kroger with blue icing and bobbers on top (linking the bobbers here).
If my son ever decides to be a fisherman, we now have bobbers and lures for days!
CENTERPIECES
Cattails for centerpieces made for a simple table decoration. I used the galvanized buckets with paper in the bottom (had a bunch from all of my Amazon orders) then river rocks on top to fill the bucket with the cattails secured in between. Around the buckets we draped some fishing net with some smaller rocks, lures (be careful of the sharp hooks), and bobbers.
The cocktail tables I use are linked here along with the table covers. For the bigger tables, I used a fun blue with the raised circles adding texture to the table.
DIAPER COVER
My goal with the “Ofishally ONE” diaper cover was to get a picture of him in just that, but this was the best I got. Fishing shirt and diaper cover. It’s still adorable, though! And, you get a close up look at the baby fishing shirt.
I’ve learned to let some things go at the parties and enjoy it. Hard for a type A personality like me, for sure!
EDIBLE CATTAILS
These cattails are Swiss Rolls on on bamboo skewers (which we cut to eliminate the point on the end) held in place by styrofoam under the moss in an oval galvanized tub. And, bobbers made everything more festive!
Now, I have to share our learning. The Swiss Rolls will slide down the skewers since they are standing upright, so we cut slivers of wine cork and slid them under the rolls to hold them up. Completely a game time call as they were sliding right before guests arrived. You can see the cork if you look closely.
COOKIES
The cutest cookies were done by a local baker, Sweets by Shey: bobbers, fish, “Gone Fishing” sign, and one that looked like an oval piece of wood with “The Big ONE” on it.
The other two items, scalloped napkins and fish coasters, pictured below were perfect additions to the party. The scalloped napkins with a gold trim were a fun nod to the scales on a fish while still keeping an elegance to them. I found the coasters at HomeGoods randomly and snagged the “Drink Up” coasters for the event.
TABLES, CHAIRS, TABLECLOTHS
Here’s a closeup of the texture of the blue/turquoise raised petal tablecloths. I used cream colored ones for my daughter’s 2nd birthday Bubble Bash so when I saw this color I knew it was perfect for the party.
Also linking the tables and chairs that at this point have been used for 4 birthday parties and a couple of other events. For us, since we have room to store it all, buying was ideal.
BANNERS
The banners I found online were perfect for the background of the cake smashing. “The Big One” banner is customizable and comes with the fish and bobbers also (or without if you choose). The cute “ONE” for the highchair was an easy order and great quality!
I hung the big banners behind the high chair on bamboo poles and put the bamboo poles through actual fishing poles so the fishing poles flank the banners. They somewhat blend in with the busy vine background, but the small detail made me happy.
SMASH CAKE
For a smash cake, there’s a baker in my area that makes a blueberry cake (it was INCREDIBLE) and could create this “wave” look - Kingwood Bakery. I found the fish and “The Big One” sign cake topper online and added them myself along with the 1 candle. I used a log cake stand that has come in handy more often than I anticipated.
Below you can see the layout of the time capsule pages I printed (they were an easy printable I found online) that went with the theme. It includes sections like “When you grow up I think you will be...” and “How do I know you?” to name a couple.
FAVORS
Fishing pole favors were a must! I found little water squirting fish, handheld fish water games, fish stickers, and Swedish Fish and cinched them in clear favor bags with twine tied to sticks we collected around the house. Gathering sticks was a fun activity for my daughter to feel like she was a part of the planning.
The printable tags were easy to print, but I had Katie & Co print and cut them to make sure the bobbers were cut correctly. And, I printed a sign that was framed near the favors that said “Thank You for Making My Birthday Reel Fun!”
My apologies to my friends/the parents who had sticks in their cars on the way home, but it was really cute!
Unlike his sister, our little guy dug right in to the cake and enjoyed eating it! I love this picture that Daniel Ortiz captured of him once we took the cake away. O-fish-ally ONE!
We love that so many friends celebrate with us. And, below is a close up of the photo spot (you can see the paper lantern bobbers) with two of my friends that are so good about coming!
POOL BOBBERS
Having our pool completed literally the week of the party was chaotic, but I was able to create my big bobbers for the pool. This was not a perfectly executed project, but overall I was happy with them and they looked great. The top is a to-go container spray painted red and the bottom is a red plastic tablecloth taped to the floating orbs I purchased with red Duck Tape.
The taping of the tablecloth to the orb was a feat in itself. With help from my family, we did it once and then redid it. Ultimately, the tablecloth was taped at the base of the orb. It will take in water, so I attempted to tape the seam as well as we could.
I wish I could give a step but step tutorial, but the pool bobber was truly a “try and see what works” experience. Biggest tip: have patience and don’t be afraid to redo them if they don’t look right.
**A big thank you to all of my family who helps me execute all of my ideas and to Daniel Ortiz for the great photos!
__________________________________________________________________
Reeling in the Big One Party Supplies
- Bait Bar Sign (printable) $2.50
- Balloons (light blue, white, and true blue, 100 pack) $10.99
- Banner: The Big One (personalized banner linked w bobbers & fish) $44
- Banner: Burlap One for Highchair $10.99
- Bobbers (small for cupcakes and tables) $6.49
- Cattails (set of 4 sprays) $24.99
- Cake Stand (Rustic Log) $48.86
- Cake Topper: “The Big One” starts at $14.99 (linked similar as exact one no longer available)
- Chairs (individual and 4 pack) $44.72 and $142.41
- Cups (gold rimmed, 50 count) $14.99
- Diaper Cover: “Ofishally One” $20
- Duck Tape (red) $7.08
- Favor Tags: Bobbers $3 (in favors: Fish water game, Swedish Fish, Stickers)
- Favor Bags (100 clear bags) $3.98
- Favor Tags (bobber printable) $3
- Fish (foam, decorative on tables and photo spot, set of 3) $15.91
- Fish & Poles for Catch and Release $13.86
- Fish Coasters (unavailable online, cork ones here $12.24)
- Fish Food Tents Printable $3.50
- Fishing Game (fish and 2 poles) $28
- Fishing Lures $18.99 (found a similar set for $15.99)
- Fishing Net (natural color 2 pack) $9.50
- Fishing Net (blue) $5.52
- Fishing Shirt (for baby) $37.99
- Fish Squirts (for Favors) $7.49
- Fish Stickers for Favors (3D puffy, 20 sheets) $7.97
- Fish Water Games for Favors (assorted with others) $38.99
- Galvanized Buckets (small, set of 12) $18.87
- Galvanized Buckets (large, 2 gallon) $28.98
- Galvanized Tub (for edible cattails) $31.99
- Highchair Banner - ONE $10.99
- Invitiations: “Reeling in the Big One” file $11.99
- Kiddie Pool (45 x 10″) $10.39
- Lanterns (red) $9.97
- Months Paper Bobbers $9.50
- Moss (SuperMoss Spanish Moss) $9.52
- ONE letters (12 inch styrofoam “O”, “N”, and “E”) $9.98 each
- Paper Lanterns (made into bobbers, set of three 8 in white) $10.99
- Plastic Red Tablecloth $14.99
- Pool Orbs (made into bobbers) $89.99
- Puffer Fish (Punch Balloons, 30 count) $10.99
- Scalloped Napkins with gold trim $9.99
- Skewers (bamboo, 100 pieces) $6.95
- Swedish Fish (0.5 oz packages, 64 count) $14.99
- Swiss Rolls (for edible cattails, 6 boxes, 36 count) $11.94
- Tables: cocktail ($107.88) and large 60″ round ($118.99)
- Tablecovers (cocktail) $16.99
- Tablecloths (blue with raised round petals) $39.99
- “Thank You for Making My Party REEL Fun” signage - $2.50
- Time Capsule Printables $8
- Twine (2 roles x 656 feet) $9.89
- Wooden 1 (8 cm tall) $7.89
***Photos by Daniel Ortiz
#fishing birthday#first birthday#ofishally one#reeling in the big one#birthday cake#the big one#baby birthday#boy birthday#boy first birthday#party planni#cattails#swedish fish#reel fun#fishing party#fishing bobbers#pool bobbers#catch and release#kids party#kids birthday#baby fishing shirt#edible cattails#fishing party favors#fishing pole favors#time capsule at one year party#DIY birthday#DIY kids party#DIY fishing party#gone fishing#party list#fishing party supplies
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y'all really need to stop putting that video of someone force feeding a puffer fish on my dash
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Beyond the Betta
I want to preface this: I loved bettas, at one point when I was about 15 I had well over a dozen bettas. Nothing could stop me, especially when Minibow 5’s were constantly on sale. I still like bettas, I think they have a ton of personality and they’re really fun, engaging fish that are incredibly accessible and are pretty cheap to set up. The unfortunate thing is that bettas are sick, they’re overpriced genetic disasters which can be a grab bag of problems. Bettas ten years ago aren’t the same bettas we have now, we have so many different varieties in such a short span of time, all due to inbreeding offspring to parent or offspring to offspring in order to preserve, expand upon, or replicate a desirable trait that sprung up from the genetic mish mash that bettas are. I still assert that non-dragon scale plakats, normal veils and crown tails are some of the healthier bettas you can get.
Now, I am NOT saying that you’re a bad person for having a betta of whatever variety, healthy or not. I am not telling you to get rid of your betta or to never ever get a betta again. You can have your bettas, you can get future bettas. This isn’t an article that’s telling you to get rid of your bettas. I know that everyone leaps to that conclusion any time I or others make posts critical of modern bettas and their ‘designer’ varieties.
But the thing is, you don’t always need to go back to bettas. You can expand your horizons and choose healthier fish in tanks that people normally just leave for bettas. All of these fish have their own charms and quirks, and while some might not have the same pizazz that you expect from bettas, they’re still worthy of appreciation.
The tanks I’m using go from 10 gallons through to 20 longs, which are the most common sized tanks I see people here in the fishblr community keep their bettas in. These are just the minimums, you can always keep your fish or inverts in larger tanks! The tank sizes are simply launching pads, or for you to repurpose an existing tank you already have but have no inhabitants for yet. Keep in mind that 5 gallon tanks are teeny, they’re only 16x8x10, which is too small for me to comfortably suggest to house stock in. Price wise, you’re getting more bang for your buck if you purchase a 10 or a 20 long, especially if you take advantage of the dollar per gallon sales that Petco, Petsmart and Pet Supplies Plus have throughout the year. They’re almost never ending, right after one store has the event going, another pops up. So you have the opportunity throughout many months of the year to get a decently sized tank for relatively little money, and these smaller tanks are light enough that basic furniture in your bedroom can support them, so you don’t need to worry about finding pricey stands.
NOTE: I’ll be mostly linking to Seriously Fish, and a few others, but don’t just rely on those links for all your care needs. Explore!
NOTE VOL 2: I have updated this list and removed the category for 5 gallon tanks, as I no longer feel comfortable making suggestions for tanks this size.
Let’s move on to the lists!
TEN GALLONS:
Hara jerdoni: anchor cat, Asian stone cat. These little cats can be shy and are most active at night. The fun thing about these guys is that they are so unique, but are not impossible to find, and you can make your own teeny biotope-ish tank.
Dwarf shrimp: everyone knows these guys, neocardina or cardina, they’re fun, yet sometimes pricey, little inverts.
Thai micro crabs: another little invert, these guys are really unique and charming but they can be shy and like to hide during the day.
Pea puffer: probably the closest in terms of rambunctiousness and personality to bettas, these little puffers are curious, clever and quickly become little delights in your home. If you can handle live feeding of white worms or black worms, I highly suggest these little puffers.
Scarlet badis: Well known but frequently overlooked, scarlet badis are beautiful little gems that would make wonderful little specimens in any tank.
Heterandria formosa: the least killifish, these shy little guys aren’t actually killis but are related to guppies and endlers! They’re very hardy and very easy to breed and make excellent beginner livebearers if you don’t wanna go the more common endler or guppy route if you’re interested in starting up a little breeding project. Note: be mindful of your stocking with livebearers, your tank can be overcrowded quickly.
Neoheterandria elegans: the tiger teddy, another micro livebearer, these are a less forgiving than the least killi, but no less rewarding to keep. If you maintain clean and perfect water conditions then you’ll have no problems keeping these cuties. Note: be mindful of your stocking with livebearers, your tank can be overcrowded quickly.
Endlers: now we’re getting a teensy bit bigger, endlers are gaining popularity in recent years and it’s easy to see why, they’re as hardy and easy to breed as guppies but half the size! And they come in an array of stunning and unique colors and patterns. Note: be mindful of your stocking with livebearers, your tank can be overcrowded quickly.
Pygmy sunfish: sweet, undemanding little natives, these fish are a great way to introduce yourself to fish native in the US.
Sculpins: another little native, they’re sometimes referred to as “ugly” but I find their permanent scowls to be endearing. They’re easy to house and don’t require much else from sand and rocks in terms of decor, so you don’t need to worry about plants.
Taiwanese micro goby: A unique little guy, they’re simple to keep if you neutral pH and soft to mid water, they can be kept similarly to other hillstream gobies such as Rhinogobius nagoye, and they’re non-aggressive so you can house a trio in your tank, more if you get a bigger tank. A great fish if you're looking to create a hillstream tank.
TWENTY GALLONS (long):
Chili rasbora and other boraras: my absolute favorite nano fish, they are absolutely tiny, truly miniaturized fish! They display a great amount of curiosity that you wouldn’t expect from such a small fish, and are honestly one of the best fish I’ve ever kept. They’re great if you’re looking to start up a small biotope tank and want an excuse to add botanicals and do something really fancy.
Pygmy cory, salt and pepper cory, and tail spot cory: the three smallest corydoras in the genus, and the only ones suitable for tanks under 30 gallons! They’re charming and absolutely adorable and probably my three favorite corydoras out there.
Ember tetra: hardy, cute and beautifully colored, these tiny tetras would be perfect in any 20 long, perhaps paired with one of the above species of cory to create a ‘micro community’.
Gold tetra: lesser known but not a small presence, gold tetras actually get their colorations from a symbiotic relationship with a parasite that results in their gold coloring, but with the absence of this parasite they’ll be a stunning silver. They’d be perfect for a small scaled, blackwater tank filled with driftwood and botanicals.
Ruby tetra: very tiny and very pretty, the ruby tetra is a great little fish that would work well in a planted, driftwood filled setup.
Akysis vespa: a very cute, very tiny little cat that prefers cool, soft waters and would be great for a mini hillstream setup! No plants to worry about, just glorious rocks and sand.
Dwarf pencilfish: another cute South American that would pair well with one of the above mentioned corydoras in a mini biotope.
Rainbow darter: personable little natives that will love to hop over to you when they see you approach the tank, these darters are hardy and tolerate the harder waters that the midwest and great plains areas are notorious for having.
Sparkling gourami: a tiny relative of the betta, the sparkling gourami is a shy little jewel of a fish that will thrive in a well planted tank.
Licorice gourami: another small anabantoid, like the sparkling it’ll appreciate a well planted tank and you’ll appreciate its gorgeous colors.
Forktail rainbowfish: while many pseudomugil would be appropriate for this size tank, my favorite is the fork tail. They’re busy little guys and the males put on very amusing little display dances when sparring.
Multiple wild bettas: there are NUMEROUS species of wild betta that can be kept in a 20 gallon tank, if you’re interested I’d suggest sending elemental-kiss an ask.
Many killifish: these would suitably need their own post to cover the vast array of killis there are on the market, and the difference between annual and non-annual, but there are multiple killis that would do just fine in a 20 and spawn well.
Shell dweller cichlids, aka shellies: charming little fellas that exhibit some incredibly amusing behaviors and are easy to breed! Great beginner cichlids.
CPO crayfish: these little dwarves have just as much personality as their full-sized cousins!
There are countless more fish that I may have forgotten or simply left out, but all of these fish would do well in the smaller tanks that we typically keep bettas in. It’s good to move out of your comfort zone and learn how to set up new tanks for different fish with different needs, as setting up the tank and exploring the natural habitats of each fish in your own home is one of the major high points of the hobby. So go ahead, start something new and exciting!
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Roleplay Server Log #367
“Girls Night Out, More Cheese, Not Just a Program”
[Lie] Is down by Hera's bay, just letting her feet dangle into the water. She's waiting to spot her fellow female brine as she's currently needing somebody to bitch to about her husband-
-A few sea dragons glide into the shallows and wend their way around the kelp and the mangrove trees in the shallows. Far on the horizon Basil breeches and makes a tremendous splash in the water. After a while a small white shape becomes visible in the distance and swims lazily into the bay, circling Herabrine's house.
[Lie] - Hera!
-The pale guardian's fiery fuchsia mane is visible for a moment as the shape is shed and Herabrine drops down a narrow shoot into her house.
[Lie] Groans, not really wanting to move- Hera! Come here!
[Herabrine] is barely visible in her house below but she's bustling about doing something.
[Lie] Gets herself standing and heads for the trap door, kicking it open- Hera!
[Herabrine] Faint sound of someone dropping something and swearing.
[Lie] Huffs and makes her way down the ladder and through the short hallway into Hera's house- Hera!
[Herabrine] Come back here!
[Maggie] Bounces down the hallway towards Lie.
[Lie] Reaches down and scoops the magma cube up-
[Maggie] Excited wiggling-
[Herabrine] Oh hey, thanks Lie!
[Lie] - I've been calling your name for like ten minutes now!
[Herabrine] Sorry, I musta had water in my ears. Heh. What's the matter?
[Maggie] Is super hot and still squiggling-
[Lie] - I'm mad at CP
[Herabrine] Well come on in! You know my policy; If you have nothing nice to say, come sit next to me.
[Lie] Comes in and heads for Maggie's pen to put her away-
[Maggie] Small noises-
[Herabrine] Aw you don't have to pen her, I just forgot to shut my door.
[Lie] - Are you sure?
[Herabrine] Yeah, it's fine. Have a sit.
[Lie] Sits down on Hera's bed-
[Herabrine] Sits on the window sill - So what did the big kitty do wrong now? Try to eat Cn again?
[Maggie] Happy flop-
[Lie] - We ran out of cheese
[Herabrine] That's, that's it? I mean, he doesn't know how to make it, right? That's TLOT's thing?
[Lie] - But I want more!
[Herabrine] I think I have some... - Hops up and starts shuffling in trunks- Here I thought it was something horrible...
[Lie] - It is! But the baby!
[Herabrne] What about the baby?
[Lie] - I'm craving the cheese because of it!
[Herabrine] I heard. You're the talk of the rumor mill since you were so vocal about hating it before.
[Lie] - Oh shush!
[Herabrine] It's true! You were more then adamant. - Pulls out a small chunk and Maggie whines at the pungent smell.
[Lie] Promptly holds out her hand for it-
[Herabrine] Gives it to her-
[Maggie] Hops down and hides under the bed-
[Lie] Starts eating- Thank you. CP's been busy building a room for the baby...
[Herabrine] What's the theme so far? I thought he tended towards stone, fire, and huge cavernous spaces for his builds.
[Lie] - Stone so far, but I think I heard him throwing down a bit of carpet too
[Herabrine] You really do like that... I wonder if you'll go back to hating it once the little spud is born? Well I was partially right.
[Lie] - I kinda hope I do go back to hating it. TLOT and Doc have been making cheese near non stop for me since the cravings started
[Herabrine] That's gotta be hard on your digestion too...
[Lie] - But right now it's so good!
[Herabrine] Apart from that, hows it going?
[Lie] - I'm sore almost every moment, she's decided to try and be a dancer inside of me...
[Herabrine] I know this is going to sound super obvious... but have you tried going swimming? Just floating a bit might take some pressure off.
[Lie] - ... No?
[Herabrine] Then we should go! I don't mind going back out. I did manage to feed Maggie before she scampered off.
[Lie] - We should probably go over by the bar, the water is hotter over there and I have been getting cold a lot lately
[Herabrine] Meet me up top. I doubt you can hold your breath long enough to get to the surface from the chute- She's putting Maggie back in her pen with a little kiss-
[Lie] - Alright- She stands and pops the last of the cheese into her mouth before heading for the ladder
[Herabrine] Bustles around a little and shoots upwards through the water before bobbing up like a cork, the guardian does an artful flip and swims over to Lie, making a weird hollow noise-
[Lie] Smiles a little- I'd race you, but I don't think I'm in any condition to run- She does step into the shallows and gently grabs a hold of part of Hera
[Herabrine] Moves around a bit so her friend can get a good grip and races through the water towards the bar, fast as a dolphin despite being shaped more like a puffer fish-
[Lie] Shivers a little as they move through the colder water-
[Herbrine] Scoots up near the edge of the blocked off lava pool down the hill from the bar. The water is warmer here and she waits for Lie to get down before switching forms again-
[Lie] Slides off and floats a little- This... Actually still feels a little cold...
-The sun is going down near the horizon and the sky is tinging a lovely shade of pink-
[Herabrine] Could you just belly up to the lava pool from the outside?
[Lie] - Maybe...- She moves closer to the lava, feeling the warm stone
-As the sky darkens there's a creak up the hill and Sam steps into the doorway, there's a tiny red point of light as he smokes a redstone cig-
[Herabrine] Flops into the lava and paddles a little-
[Lie] - It is a nice night...
[Herabrine] It's too quiet. I'm suspicious...
-Thump.-
[Lie] - There's your noise
[Mix] Fuck! -From within the bar-
[Sam] Is talking quietly to someone up the hill and turns back to see if Mix is okay-
[Moth] Is coming around the side of the library with a stack of books and follows Sam inside for a moment before peeking back out and calling down- Mistress?
[Lie] - Hm? Yes?
[Mix] -Has dropped her mug and is trying to pick it back up- -grumble grumble-
[Moth] Are you okay down there?
[Herabrine] I think we've been spotted and it's too late to run away.
[Sam] Helps Mix and pours her a fresh drink-
[Lie] - Yeah, just trying to take some weight off
[Mix] Thanks Sam.
[Moth] I could just carry you if you're too tired to walk?
[Lie] - No thank you, I am fine for now. What were you doing in the library?
[Mix] -Sips her drink and decides to check out the talking by poking her head out the door-
[Moth] Doing more research. Hoff is on watch tonight.
[Sam] Also wanders back out-
[Lie] - Research for what?
[Herabrine] Oh hey Mix! You should come gossip with us!
[Moth] Why babies of course! And what kinds of things we can do to help you as well.
[Lie] - That's very sweet Moth
[Mix] Mmm... okay. -Waddles down to the group, a bit wobbly on her feet-
[Sam] Sees she's having trouble and lends her a hand getting down.
[Moth] Just saunters down and plops on a sand block,- thank you mistress.
[Herabrine] Floats up a little, riding just above the surface- You look drunk Mix.
[Sam] Would eye roll if he could.
[Mix] Thanks Sam. -With Sam's help is less wobbly, but she still plops like a ragdoll once down there, tucking her legs under her- Oh you bet your ass I am
[Lie] - Everything okay Mix?
[Moth] Yes, it's not good for people to drink in excess. especially ladies. It's unhealthy.
[Mix] Mmm... Yeah. Just thinking about stuff.
[Sam] Mimes how many she's had.
[Herabrine] Whistles- That's a lot of stuff.
[Lie] - Hey now, don't try to drink for me too!
[Moth] Tut tuts a little.
[Herabrine] Something on your mind Mix?
[Mix] Aww.. but it's fun. -Rotates the little bit of fabric tied to her wrist.- Makes it easier to think.
[Lie] - What are you thinking of Mix?
[Moth] What is that? If you don't mind me asking?
[Herabrine] And where's the psycho chicken? I haven't seen him around in quite some time.
[Mix] I don't know where Benny is.. I'm kinda worried about him too.. And this? -Holds her arm out and points at the soft orange fabric- Ahhh... Just something I've hung onto for a long time.
[Herabrine] You want me to hunt around for him psychically?
[Moth] It's a pretty color.
[Mix] It is! And uh... If you don't mind? He always comes back eventually.
[Herabrine] Touches her feet on the shore and closes her bright eyes, reaching outward to find the reckless chicken with her mind-
[Moth] Puts the books away and wades into the shallows to splash her face - ahh, it's so nice and warm.
[Lie] - The lava pool does that... I remember we accidentally cooked a bunch of lobsters when we first made the pool
[Benny] -Climbing a tree somewhere. Amazing.-
[Herabrine] Still concentrating-That was a fun night-
This message has been removed.
[Mix] -Absent mindedly twists fabric some more-
[Herabrine] I think he's trying to fly? He's in a tree?!?!
[Mix] What?!
[Moth] So what's the fabric Mix?
[Herabrine] Sends to Benny- Come to the bar you dumb birb. Mix is drunk and worried about you!
[Lie] - If I recall correctly I can't have most things that come from the water right now...
[Benny] -Falls out of tree- No! Not yet!
[Herabrine] YES Come home you stupid chicken!!!
[Mix] It's just a square. -She unwinds it and holds it up, it's got a small motif in each corner-
[Benny] No. I will soon, though. Don't worry!
[Lie] Sticks her hand in the lava to test it, when she pulls her hand out it hardens as usual-
[Moth] That's a shame. I have found quite a few dietary restrictions in the literature for the health of the baby. It's so complicated. Oh, and it's pretty Mix. I like orange. You don't see it much.
[Sam] Examines the square more closely-
[Herabrine] out loud- Stubborn ass.
[Lie] - It's already starting to get harder to walk, and I'm having to rely on you guys a bit more to tend to the animals
[Mix] I'm really fond of orange, but it makes me sad, usually. And is Benny being stubborn?
[Moth] Oh, you're light as a feather Lie. Just say the word and I or any of my brethern will gladly carry you.
[Herabrine] Yeah, he's doing something but he says he'll come home soon. Way more erudite then I was expecting him to be.
[Sam] Signs- Why sad?
[Lie] - You'd probably have to fight CP off for that honor
[Moth] Shrugs- Just offering.
[Mix] Ugh... as long as he comes home, I guess... -Small frown as she wraps the fabric around her wrist again- Uh... It was a color someone really important to me wore a lot. -Points at the fabric in explanation.- I haven't seen them in a long time. -frowns a bit and holds mug close again-
[Lie] - Do we need to go searching for somebody else?
[Mix] No.
[Herabrine] Ah.... someone lost in the turmoil before you came here?
[Mix] -Softly- Yeah.
[Lie] - I'm sorry Mix
[Moth] I am sorry for your loss then.
[Sam] Nods solemly-
[Herabrine] I dunno, living here I've learned that it's never a good idea to count anyone entirely lost.
[Lie] - This is true...
[Mix] Maybe.... But I'm pretty sure.
[Mix] Didn't mean to bring down the mood, haha.. What's been up with you, Lie? Beyond being pregnant?
[Lie] - Cravings and soreness and mood swings and I'm just a mess
[Herabrine] She's also super cold and inhaling TLOT's stinky gold cheese like it's going out of style. Don't have kids Mix. -chuckles- It seems like a huge pain.
[Sam] signs -Unless you're having an egg haha.
[Mix] Heh, don't plan on it anytime soon,
[Lie] - Well it's not as if CP and I planned this
[Moth] This is true.
[Herabrine] Eh, you're good with kids though. I figured this would happen eventually anyway.
[Sam] Signs- So how is your household faring Mix?
[Lie] - Actually, you could say Sam is partially responsible for my getting pregnant
[Mix] It's alright, Prince is adjusting to seeing really well, and. .. Stev and NK are fucking like bunnies at every opportunity. -Softly- At least I wasn't that bad....
[Sam] Signs frantically - Me??!? What did I do???
[Herabrine] Ha! You should encourage them to get their own build if it's bugging you.
[Lie] - The alchohol you gave as a belated wedding present? That's what CP and I drank right before, well, yeah
[Sam] Signs- Oh geeze! I'm sorry Lie!
[Mix] -Very blunt look at Hera- They have one. On the shore. They're L O U D.
[Lie] - There's nothing to apologize for Sam, we also forgot to take one of the berries
[Herabrine] Maybe you could surround their house with wool, real subtle like? -grins mischeviously
[Mix] -Strokes chin thoughtfully- Maybe..
[Sam] Still looks contrite
[Herabrine] Can I help? [wool everything over mostly]
[Lie] Winces a little, feeling the baby squirm-
[Herabrine] Feels her distress - Put your arms out and float.
[Mix] Sure, I don't mind
[Moth] So what's this about a chicken anyway?
[Lie] Does as Hera instructs- Come on, calm down little one
[Herabrine] She's fiesty.
[Lie] - And taking after her father, she's griefed CP and TLOT
[Moth] Giggles- With some well-timed kicks.
[Herabrine] Tries to brush the babies mind to see if she can read anything-
-There aren't really any thoughts yet, but it's responding to Lie's movement and voice-
[Moth] Notices Hera's look of concentration. - Getting any signals miss?
[Herabrine] She's just listening and kicking around-
[Lie] - Well she could tone down the kicking a little
[Mix] -Plays with the fabric some more while watching-
[Moth] If she's listening, maybe I can help. - She starts to hum a few bars and then breaks into a soft lulling melody. It's wordless but tuneful and she has a lovely voice.
[Herabrine] Is staring openmouthed. - So much for the old joke about teaching a pig to sing....
[Lie] Feels the baby squirm a little more before she starts to settle a little
[Moth] Keeps singing softly and there's a hush in the few milling mobs beyond the pool of lava light, after a little while she trails off into a few trilling notes and goes quiet- Is that better?
[Lie] - She did settle down a little
[Moth] Good.
[Herabrine] So what's the story behind your hankie Mix?
[Mix] I hurt myself on accident and we didn't really have anything on hand to stop the blood flow. He said I could keep it once I cleaned it up. -It sounds pretty simple. A little too simple.-
[Herabrine] Ah, we all have our mementos.
[Lie] - My memento just lives with me
[Moth] Gives Mix a supportive pat with one huge hand.
[Herabrine] Ha! Too right. He needed a keeper anyway.
[Lie] - I'm surprised he hasn't come looking for me yet actually, he's fretting almost more than anyone else
[Herabrine] If you legit yelled at him for there not being any more cheese he might have gone to get more....
[Lie] - Well Doc went out and I don't know where TLOT is...
[Sam] Signs- You can pretty much just yell for TLOT from anywhere and get his attention...
[Lie] - Doesn't mean he'll respond if he's with Steve
[Herabrine] That's a good point.... And if he is ahem, 'with Steve' it's not smart to interrupt. Especially if you value your eyeballs. hehe.
[Lie] - Not like that's stopped CP before
[Moth] The master is quite tenacious.
[Lie] - Actually, does anyone know where Doc went? I saw they left with Notch and some others...
[Mix] No clue here.
[Herabrine] If they took Notch it's probably money related since he has the cards. Or they went to visit the office staff. Who else went?
[Lie] - Um, Deer, Flux, Yaunfen, I think HG and Glitchy too? I was a little miffed at the time so I wasn't paying much attention
[Herabrine] If they took the kid... it can't be anything dangerous.
[Lie] - True
[Moth] whistles as if she knows nothing, though she does have suspicions.
[Lie] - ... I'm getting cold again...
[Herabrine] There's always the lava? You could just dip your feet?
[Lie] - It'll just harden on me...
[Herabrine] Yeah, but feet are easy to clean.
[Lie] - True...
[Moth] You could sit against me?
[Lie] - Yeah, I guess- She stands walking out of the water and once the air hits her she starts shivering, hard- Maybe getting in the water was a bad idea...
[Herabrine] Hmm. - She waves her hands and raises several water spawn blocks out of the water into a column that's as warm as a shower and endlessly falling beside the lava pool-
[Moth] Interesting trick-
[Mix] -Claps- Niceee!
[Herabrine] Try that. It's pretty hot.
[Lie] Moves into the water- Thank you Hera. Hey Mix, do you want a sobering flower?
[Mix] Nah, I'm good. I'd get sad again. Best not to let this go to waste.
[Lie] - What are you sad about?
[Mix] The person I lost, mostly.
[Lie] - Who were they?
[Mix] -Shuffles a bit before pulling a small picture out, it's off two figures, one of which is a more happy looking Mix, and a taller person who's got his arm around her shoulder and a hesitant smile on his face. Around Mix's neck in the picture is the fabric she's got around her wrist currently.- Him. He... meant a lot to me.
[Lie] - Oh Mix...
[Mix] -Looks fondly at the picture- Yeah...
[Lie] - What was his name?
[Mix] Niko. His name was Niko.
[Lie] - That's a nice name
[Mix] Yeah... -Fond sigh-
[Lie] - Are you sure we wouldn't be able to find them?
[Mix] Yeah, certain.
[Lie] - I see...
[Herabrine] Did a NOTCH get him Mix?
[Moth] Little intake of breath.
[Mix] No, thankfully. I think I would've kicked the fuckers ass if it was. -Small frown-
[Herabrine] That's the spirit!
[Moth] Then what.. what happened?
[Mix] -Stares at the picture a bit more before shaking her head.- I don't... I don't want to talk about it right now. If.... If that's okay.
[Lie] - Absolutely, we understand
[Moth] Okay.
[Herabrine] So how's your tribe doing?
[Mix] -Perks up a bit- The lightfeet are doing wonderfully! They're not lazing about now! -Returns picture to her inventory-
[Herabrine] What happened to get them moving?
[Mix] Give them a ball and you get them off their asses, apparently.
[Moth] What's a ball?
[Lie] - An object you can throw around and play with
[Moth] Oh that makes sense!
[Herabrine] And Liz? I haven't seen her lately either. Getting big yet?
[Mix] Liz is getting long, mostly! Shi's out and about just.. at odd times. Really odd times.
[Herabrine] And the big daddy and the little shy kiddo?
[Moth] Perhaps she's nocturnal?
[Mix] Big... daddy?
[Herabrine] Snaps her fingers - Gambit?
[Lie] - Endrea's kids are getting so big too
[Mix] ... Oh! Gambet, and his kid? Uh.... Not too sure. I've seen Alan when Liz brings them over. Alan's a bit skittish still.
[Sam] signs- Well they are dragons... Endrea is HUGE.
[Herabrine] Sometimes kids are just shy.
[Lie] - Hera... I want more cheese...
[Herabrine] Sorry, I'm fresh out.
[Sam] Signing - cheese?
[Lie] Whines a little-
[Moth] at Sam, - the Golden Steelton TLOT makes.
[Sam] Oh.
[Mix] The stinky stuff.
[Lie] - CP better get some soon
[Herabrine] Almost makes me feel sorry for him...
[Moth] Offers her some watermelon slices - I heard these were a common pregnancy craving Lie.
[Lie] - I'm not craving those, but I probably should have something other than cheese and chips...
[Sam] signing- I could make something?
[Lie] - I'm not terribly hungry right now...
[Herabrine] Okay Lie, lets just get you home then. Hopefully Cp has your cheese by now...
[Lie] - Okay...
-After Hera leaves Lie at her house the white haired brine heads for the workroom to warm up by the lava. As she turns the corner a pleasant scent reaches her and she's moving closer to the source. Turning the corner into the room proper she finds that CP has set things up for her even though he currently isn't home. There are freshly picked pods and flowers from her vanilla plant and a few of her calming blossoms scattered about as well. She realizes that at some point he must have gone out to the real world as there are a few candles lit around the lava tub. Lie's annoyance at him vanishes for the moment as she moves to take full advantage of what he has offered her. He's left her one of his shirts by the tub as well and she slides into the warm fluid gratefully after stripping herself to wait for CP to return-
-Deep below the lab in their private room TLOT and Steve are curled up on a rug near the lava pool. The two men are snuggled in eachothers arms just enjoying the warmth and companionship. A little food and drink sits forgotten nearby and LH is stealthily dragging away a neglected porkchop-
[CP] Has been looking stomping around looking for TLOT for hours and has only just gotten to the lab- TLOT!
[TLOT] Flops against the bed with an annoyed groan- mentally- go away Cp....
[CP] - No! Lie's mad
[Steve] Is sort of eavesdropping and his thought is loud- How come?!
[CP] - Because we're out of cheese!
[TLOT] Rubs his temples as the beginning throb of a headache ripples across his brain- Not again...
[CP] Starts coming down the stairs- Yeah well I'd rather have a happy wife! I didn't realize how much she was sneaking out of the chest without my knowing!
[TLOT] Faintly imitating Cp's tone. - Yeah, well you keep driving off my mate and it would be nice if I could have a happy husband....
[CP] - Yeah well you've never seen Lie mad like this!
[Steve] Incredulous- How bad can it really be? She's usually so nice...
[CP] Gives them a mental burst showing Lie's emotional change-
[Steve] -Blink blink- He knows it's bad to say but can't stop himself- Now you know how she felt trying to keep you happy and calm at the start...
[TLOT] Oh dear...
[CP] - TLOT, just tell me you have some more of the damn cheese stored away somewhere?
[TLOT] I do not. I gave it all to you.
[CP] Long string of curses-
[Steve] Won't she accept anything else? Eating just cheese can't be good. How about the... whatsit...? huumy bows?
[CP] - She's not even that hungry! She just wants the cheese!
[TLOT] That's very strange...
[CP] - I mean yes she will eat a few other things, but she mostly wants the cheese, and she's getting more demanding of it
[Steve] Do we have to do this? Can't you ask Doc?
[LH] Scampers up the stairs with the meat.
[CP] - Doc went out
[TLOT] How interesting... Damn it.
[CP] - I'm hoping she'll be a little calmer by the time I do get back to her, but she'll go right back to rage if I don't have any cheese
[Steve] Still quietly pondering the irony, it's not like Cp can't hear his thoughts or anything.
[TLOT] Flops in annoyance.
[CP] - Well?
[TLOT] Take Steve someplace for about ten minutes so I can make some and clear out the smell. Be nice! I want to get right back to where I left off as soon as possible.
[Steve] Huh?
[CP] - Why do I have to take him somewhere!?
[TLOT] Because I don't need you hovering over me any more then I need him crying from the smell!
[CP] - Fine!- He grabs Steve and actually teleports them near his home, so he can check and see where Lie is and what sort of mood she's in
[Steve] Is released and thumps a few inches to the ground. - Oof! Damn stiff boots...
[CP] Sends out his senses and feel Lie in the lava tub- Well at least she won't be moving from there...
[Steve] Oh? Is she in bed with Blake, Hope and the vulpixes?
[CP] - Nope, naked in the lava tub. Even with her emotions running haywire, she won't run around naked, plus hardened lava makes it a bit harder to move
[Steve] You guys should keep some potions around for that, it makes that stuff slip right off.
[CP] - Nope, I prefer to take it off myself. Besides, I suspect she'll be in there a lot with how cold she's been lately
[Steve] The kiddo wants the heat, doesn't she? Geeze... you'd think she's part nether dragon.
[CP] - Well I run pretty hot myself...
[Steve] Yeah, I know. -stretches- TLOT is the same way. It's pretty comforting. Especially if you've been working and your muscles hurt.
[CP] Just shrugs-
[Steve] So... uh... hows Stevie handling his glitch? -There's a question here he's afraid to ask anyone-
[CP] - Well so far he hasn't turned his house into a glacier- His psychic abilities are wandering a little
[Steve] Do uh....? - He scuffs a foot in the grass a little - Do you think the glitch might get worse over time...?
[CP] - Maybe a little, it took a bit of time for mine to stabilize
[Steve] Did you do anything special to... fix it at a certain level...?
[CP] - Nope, I let it settle itself out, was too painful to do otherwise
[Steve] Pales a little- Painful? What...? Like trying to fight or hold it was hurtful?
[CP] Thinks for a moment- Trying to stop it I believe, it was so long ago that I don't really recall
[Steve] How would you even stop it...?
[CP] - I don't think you can
[Steve] Is staring off into space unhappily- Oh...
[CP] - TLOT should be done by now, let's go
[Steve] Yeah.. okay... - He's checking- Give him another few minutes, he's fumigating the room.
[CP] Groans in annoyance-
[Steve] Awkward silence. -
[CP] Waits for the time to pass before grabbing Steve and teleporting him back-
[TLOT] Has already cleared the room and put the cheese in a trunk- Here, take this weird plant too. - Holding out the failure plant- Lie might be able to do something with it, but I hate the way it smells. Yaunfen made it accidentally.
[CP] - Fine- Takes everything and then teleports back to his house
[Licht] Sighs as she gets into her cruiser, having just been called to a burglary-
[EAlex] Makes a thoughtful noise as the phone is placed against the passenger seat- Your GPS is all over the map... what on the seed are you doing?
[Licht] - My job. Currently I'm heading someplace that was broken into, burglarized
[EAlex] Burglarized? Was is that?
[Licht] - It means somebody forcefully entered the domain of somebody else and stole things
[EAlex] There's a sharp intake of breath and she's quiet for a moment. - That explains your harshness then... You hunt griefers...
[Licht] - I... Suppose so? I hunt criminals technically
[EAlex] There will always be rules and people who break them... But there will also be those who are hunted because they look like troublemakers, even if they aren't.
[Licht] - Here you cannot be persecuted just by how you look, at least not legally
[EAlex] I remain skeptical of that.
[Licht] Pulls up to a house and plugs a set of headphones into her phone so she can still hear EAlex as she goes into the house to look at the crime scene-
[EAlex] Is using the camera lenses on the phone to look around - So much detail, and people... with weapons..? - She shrinks uncomfortably back into the deeper guts of the phones small hard drive.
[Licht] - Nobody is going to use a weapon here. We carry them for protection and only use them as a last resort. In fact your more likely to be hit by the taze gun than the real one
[EAlex] Still... humans use weapons rather freely. Especially the younger ones. A child with a simple iron sword can cause a lot of pain. And I do not know what this taze you speak of is.
[Licht] - It's a device that delivers a non lethal dose of electricity to stun people
[EAlex] Sounds like something a NOTCH would use, to force compliance when someone disagrees with them...
[Licht] - We use it when somebody is being threatening towards us. Most people are compliant and understand that they did something wrong. And what would Markus have to do with anything?
[EAlex] So says one with power to one without; I'll only hurt you if I have too... And NOTCHs are evil. They rule with iron fists and crush unbelievers.
[Licht] - There's only one
[EAlex] I wish... many wear the mantle of NOTCH, and many use it to spread fear.
[Licht] - So somebody pretending to be Mr. Perrson?
[EAlex] You don't understand...
[Licht] Looks up as another officer approaches-
[Offcer] - Licht, busy morning?
[Licht] - Yeah, you?
[Officer] - Just a few traffic tickets
[EAlex] Is quiet but uses the camera to examine the person she's talking too, she's nervous being around such a huge human and the phone shakes slightly in Licht's hand.
[Licht] Is just talking business and being briefed on what had been stolen-
[Officer] - So yeah, if you want to go start checking some pawn shops...
[Licht] - Why the rush to get me out?
[Officer] - Face it, your tenacity is why you get stuff done, so the sooner we get you on this, the sooner it might be solved
[Licht] - Fine fine
[EAlex] Like an angry wolf...
[Licht] Starts heading back towards her car- Well, guess it's time for some leg work...
[EAlex] Why did you light the summoner? It seems you have no time for any world besides this one.
[Licht] Huffs a little- The game itself was given to me as a clue to what Markus was doing. When I got in there, there was a chest with a book with instructions on how to build the summoner, so I built it
[EAlex] Then you have no idea what you called for... and what you recieved is even more terrible.
[Licht] - What do you mean?
[EAlex] The summoner isn't a toy, and the thing that answered it's call is not... normal...
[Licht] - So? It's not like it effects me
-There's a bit of a pressure change in the air and Licht feels suddenly short of breath, it's a distinct pain around her throat that's sharp and gone as quickly as it arrived. The phone lets out a burst of white noise and EAlex calls out in alarm as the small device starts downloading something in the background.
[Licht] Quickly pulls over and curses a little in Swedish- Wha... What?
[EAlex] Is visible on her screen stomping against the wallpaper in obvious distress.
[Licht] - What was that?
-There's a small pop and an icon for Minecraft pocket edition is visible long enough for EAlex to let out a small cry of alarm. She stomps on the wallpaper and makes the icons wiggle before slapping at the X to delete it frantically. -
[Licht] - What are you doing?
[EAlex] Falls over and lays flat on the surface of the wallpaper like she's making a snow angel and breathing hard- Saving our pixels!
[Licht] - What did you do?
[EAlex] Don't talk bad about... him... He'll take it out on us both. But he needs a copy of the game to get at me more easily on your phone.
[Licht] - You mean the Herobrine on the computer?
[EAlex] YES. The one who took my spawn!
[Licht] Makes a frustrated noise- You're just some random ai, not even real, why do you try to act like it!
[EAlex] I'm not an AI! I'm a glitch!
[Licht] - Whatever! Either way! You're just programs!
[EAlex] No we're not. - She sits up and gets closer to the screen by standing on an icon- Just because I'm not made of meat and water like you, doesn't mean I'm not real.
[Licht] - You are a program!
[EAlex] I am not! I have a soul! -waves her hands in frustration- What can I do to prove it?!?
[Licht] - There's nothing to prove!
[EAlex] So I am sentenced to be a non-person by someone who claims to uphold justice?
[Licht] - You. Are. A. Program! One I could easily throw away!
[EAlex] Shakes with fear- You're a player just as evil as a NOTCH, one who would kill for no reason.
[Licht] - I do not kill!
[EAlex] If you delete me, I will die.
[Licht] - You technically don't actually exist! You were made, AS A PROGRAM!
[EAlex] I WAS NOT MADE. The world gave me a place to gain a body! But I existed as a spirit before!
[Licht] - Yeah right- She pulls up in front of the first pawn shop- Just shut up and let me do my damn job
[EAlex] very quietly- I think you're the one with no soul.
[Licht] Goes about her job for the rest of the day in a somewhat foul mood, deciding to end her day at a bar-
[EAlex] Has rearranged Licht's icons and is now browsing the internet in an equally unhappy mood. Her activity is visible on the screen and the battery is running a bit low. -
[Licht] Grumbles and pulls a charger out of her bag and plugs it and the phone into the wall as she waits for her drink-
[EAlex] Takes a measure of electricity for herself and tries to order her thoughts. The phone is flat and she can't see anything but the ceiling.
[Licht] Receives a decently strong drink and starts downing it-
[EAlex] Resigned and quiet- Could you at least prop the phone up? I don't think that's too much for non-person to ask.
[Licht] - Why?
[EAlex] So I can see.
[Licht] - There's nothing to see
[EAlex] Then I'll just stare at the ceiling. - She sits down with a huff. - And me without even a Steve or an Alex to bother...
[Licht] - Oh fine!- She tilts the phone up so EAlex can see
[EAlex] Notices her drink. - Can you spare 17 Krona?
[Licht] - Why?
[EAlex] Because... I'm hungry and I have an idea.
[Licht] - No, you don't need it, nor do I think you need food
[EAlex] I could be mean and just take it, but I chose to ask.
[Licht] - And I could let my phone use neither data or wi-fi
[EAlex] -Theres a quiet but very distinct rumble from the earbuds, it's unmistakably the sound of an empty stomach.
[Licht] - Nice try- She asks for another drink, having finished hers
[EAlex] Picks around on her wallpaper and looks up pleadingly, her eyes are a bit dimmer then they were when she entered the phone and the distance from her game is wearing on her a bit.
[Licht] - Humor me for a minute- If you were to get some food, how would you expect them to shove it into the phone?
[EAlex] Weakly and a bit resigned- I know an app game I can take some from, it's not expensive.
[Licht] - Fine, do whatever
[EAlex] Vanishes with a soft voomp. The phone warms as it downloads a small app and a new icon pops up. There's a sound like someone desperately eating something messy-
[Licht] Just starts working on her second drink before glancing at the screen-
-The icon is Fruit Ninja-
[EAlex] Reappears with half a watermelon and a bit more glow, she's still eating but more slowly now. - ........ thank you.
[Licht] - Whatever
[EAlex] I guess I should be grateful for anything. It's not a bad game either, and I could unlock all the swords if you wanted...
[Licht] - I'd never play it
[EAlex] Of course.
[Licht] - You know what, I'm going to give you ten minutes...
[EAlex] Ten minutes to what? Beg for my life some more?
[Licht] - To convince me that you are what you say you are, a being with a soul
[EAlex] Her eyes go wide - H-how? What would you even accept as proof?
[Licht] - That's for you to figure out
[EAlex] Spreads her arms- I am a finite creature with a mind and feelings. How is that different from you? Perhaps I should ask what you could say to prove to me that you aren't a demon with no soul yourself.
[Licht] - Simple, I'm human, I am made from flesh
[EAlex] Bristles as she speed reads a few articles from the web - Flesh is atomic particles and waves and mostly empty space. You're made out of electricity same as me.
[Licht] - I am more than electricity
[EAlex] I can show you the science. Written by your own people... Give me another test.
[Licht] - You haven't convinced me yet, you haven't proven anything to me yet
[EAlex] Then tell me what can a human do that a program can not?
[Licht] - We can create legitimate life, plus there is consequence when we take it
[EAlex] If I killed too many players I would be deleted. Is that not a consequence? And too my chagrin, I have the female parts to make a child. But even if I wanted one, I would need a mate.
[Licht] - Still not convinced little program
[EAlex] Grimaces- can a program feel pain?
[Licht] - They can be programed to believe so
[EAlex] Can a human tell the difference between real pain and someone programmed to simulate it?
[Licht] - Most of the time? Yes when looking at context
[EAlex] Gives her a grim look- Fine. - She vanishes back into the small icon and comes back out with a plain sword from the game. She grits her teeth and slashes her left arm with the blade before dropping it with the shock of the pain. She can't hold back the wail of agony that escapes her lips as she bleeds copiously on the backround wallpaper and sinks to her knees with tears streaming down her face.
[Licht] - Context, you are a program, it doesn't really effect you. You are made of nothing but data
[EAlex] Is cradling her arm in agony and making a rather large pool of blood. It hurts too much to muster more then a choked response. It's the merest gulp of air and labored breathing echoing in the earpiece.
[Licht] - Nice try, but I'm not convinced
[EAlex] Must I... die to plead my case...?
[Licht] - It's not as if you'll actually die
[EAlex] Then I cannot convince you, without destroying myself... Then my small existence is doomed...
[Licht] - Then just accept it, you are nothing more than a program
[EAlex] Stronger with sudden fury - I AM NOT A PROGRAM.
[Licht] - You have yet to convince me otherwise
[EAlex] Is near passed out from the blood loss and pain, her head is spinning, she didn't realize how weak she'd be away from her game with an injury to boot. - You are a monster... without pity...
[Licht] - If you're done being insulting, I have some work to do- She digs through her bag and pulls out a folder containing some of the information she has on Markus
[EAlex] Passes out from the pain, and lays there very still on her wallpaper in a pool of bright crimson blood.
-The phone shakes a little and the pocket edition Minecraft reloads itself again. There's a rather creepy laugh in her earbuds-
[Licht] Twitches a little-
[???] Awww... did the weakling hurt herself?
[Licht] - Not sure how a program can actually hurt itself
[???] Just because you don't know how something works, doesn't mean it's impossible. Why was she playing with a blade?
[Licht] - Trying to prove she was real
[???] Laughs- She's too weak to prove anything to you. Perhaps I should take a turn..?
[Licht] - What are you talking about?
[???] Ignores her question- How about I show you something really good....
[Licht] - Only if it helps me solve this case
[???] Hmmm... It might.... And it might entertain me for a moment as well...
-There's a sudden shift in the atmosphere, as if she stepped sideways out of reality, the people around her slow and freeze in place but there's still a rather schizophrenc chorus of whispers all around her. -
[Licht] - Wha... What's happening?
[???] Just a bit of fun.... - The air goes dark and foggy until her vison is blotted out entirely and she feels large hands wrapping around her windpipe and squeezing just enough to make it hard to breathe.
[Licht] Tenses and squirms a little-
[???] Opens white eyes that fill her field of vision and half-blind her. His breath is hot against her face - Do you believe now?
[Licht] - What are you doing!?
[???] Leaving a few marks.
[Licht] - Marks?
[???] Squeezes a little tighter, the skin already purpling under his grip-
[Licht] - S... Stop it
[???] Or what?
[Licht] - Just... Stop...
[???] Are you trying to goad me into killing you so soon?
[Licht] - You kill me and you'll find no way to Markus
[???] Markus isn't my prey my sweet, but good try.
[Licht] - Then what is?- She's starting to get woozy
[???] All in good time. - He notices her slipping and puts her down roughly- Can't have you dying on me just yet.... - The whispering goes up in volume and the color and motion resume around her. Her reflection is visible in the bar mirror and there are already angry purple and red bruises in the shape of hands forming around her throat.
[Licht] Quickly motions that she's like to pay and grabs her phone, her hands shaking a little
[EAlex] Slowly coming around with a pained groan...
[Licht] Pays and hurries outside-
[EAlex] Is bumped around a little and opens her eyes - You are... fleeing? OH!
[Licht] Scowls as she opens her car door and tosses the phone onto the passenger seat-
[EAlex] Drags herself to the fresh icon and sets everything wobbling before deleting it- You... you are injured?
[Licht] - I... I don't understand...
[EAlex] What is there to understand? You seem so certain we are just programs that feel nothing.
[Licht] - That... That doesn't explain how he was able to...
[EAlex] Now do you believe me?
[Licht] - I... Maybe...
[EAlex] Then at least my suffering isn't in vain...
[Licht] Starts up the car and begins heading home-
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Sad news
So for those of you who have been following me for a while, you will be familiar with my little bundle of teeth and hunger Pop Tart. I spent several months turning a used tank into a special project, went through several set backs, and he was a champ through it all.
He came home and was quickly the light of the living room. Family loved him, they even shared pictures, and video with other family, co-workers even.
Unfortunately his heater went through a major malfunction, and since he hasn’t been right. He’s fought what ever it did to his gills, and seemed to overcome that. He’s been touch and go with eating and I honestly thought he was going to pull through. I’ve fretted, and done many smaller partial water changes to ensure his water is pristine during his time of need. Everyone has been rooting for this tough little creature to pull through.
He spit out what he had eaten last week Friday night. I woke up to him dead Sat. I’ve done a good close look at his body since. This is the first time I’ve autopsied my own fish, and I could find nothing in his throat, and nothing obstructing his stomach. No debris what so ever.
The feeder fish in there are still alive. They bred in fact (guppies). Water conditions are still good. Very low reading on the nitrates (10-20 ppm), no ammonia, stable ph around 7. No nitrite either.
This hurts deep. However, I had come to accept several weeks ago that this may be the inevitable conclusion. It doesn’t make it easier, just that I was prepared for this possibility mentally, and emotionally.
I’ve considered breaking the tank down. Just being done with it. I’ve considered moving fish from the 80 gallon over to make feeding easier. I’ve considered taking something home that needs a home from work. Some fish that has been there too long. There are two fish that both (separately) could live out their lives in that tank. They have been at work far too long. One is an Avocado Puffer, and the second is actually a Rainbow Wolf-Fish. My family wants me to bring home the wolf. He has no color, and was rejected by the person he was special ordered for, because of his lack of orange coloration.
I can’t bring Pop Tart back. But I can give a fish a home that no one wants. That may be what I end up doing. I really don’t want to bring anything home yet, but if I wait too long the cycled tank will be lost due to lack of nitrates to feed the system. Anyway I wanted to keep everyone informed.
For those still reading, the heater that caused this mess was put out by Ehiem. It’s the Tru-Temp model. I’ve seen several of these over the past year+ have issues with holding their seal, and getting stuck on after taking in water. My work has tried to email the company, and I’ve personally done the same. They seem to be ignoring their emails. If you have one of these heaters it may never fail you. Or, it may end up costing you an entire tank, or a precious life like it did for me.
I’ve moved all my tanks to Fluval heaters, and am carefully tracking temperatures. I’ve got a temp probe on one tank, and will ultimately look to getting controllers. Unfortunately these are not cheap, or so I am led to believe. If anyone has experience with heater controllers that are meant to prevent issues like this by cutting off power to heaters when tanks are at temp, or going beyond please, please send me a private message. I’m looking for something reliable that doesn’t cost 100+ bucks. I need three to cover all three tanks so I want to be cost effective about this.
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Weekly updates:
I removed (1) and added (3) plants to the 20gal. I also introduced 2 more nerites snails.
My stocking (running an air pump made for a 60gal with two sponge filters):
I test the water about once a week, everything is stable (nitrates/etc 0). The water is clear so long as I keep the gunk off the bottom of the filter (so it can keep sucking up particulates). I don't change the water cus the system takes care of itself. I need to feed my fish less cus they need to clear up some hair algae and diatoms, but otherwise it's going pretty smoothly at this stage.
I may eventually have to take out some Guppies (surprisingly it looks like all the babies are female), but luckily the pond snail population seems pretty stable for right now. I might eventually take out a Nerite, but we'll see if the Assassin eventually gets to one (as if I'd know cus I haven't seen the Assassin snail in weeks).
Other than that spontaneous meddling, it's back to feeling complete.
The 55gal is starting to feel more lively. Since the nitrates dropped to zero, I added a few more Neons and Danios, as well as 2 blue Mystery Snails. It still feels under-planted but there's four bulbs sprouting that will no-doubt add a lot of foliage.
This tank and the 10gal will eventually have one of their sponge filters traded out for the fluidized beds (technically I'm going to give the one from the 20gal to the 55gal and put smaller ones in the 20 & 10gal) since I find that cleans the water column pretty well.
And in the swampy abyss that is the 10gal Puffer tank (sorry guys you did it to yourselves), I have added 6 Mylasian Trumpet Snails to help out with the cleaning. They hide all day and then come out at night while the Puffers are sleeping and they're now the linchpin of my cleaning strategy. I did get in there and clean the diatoms off the Amazon Sword and it seems much, much happier now... but the glass still needs a lot of cleaning (believe it or not, I'm leaving it because they're slowly getting to it).
The darkest trapdoor snail continues to do quite well and is even getting to work during the day - maybe it's the dark shell or maybe it's that the shell is covered in algae (I'm not joking)... but they seem to leave that one totally alone. The teal trapdoor snail is starting to get brave and poke his foot out and the remaining Puffers are seeming to get bored of pestering them when they're otherwise well-fed.
I did take one Puffer back to the store since I got 2 males (and he was extremely aggressive). I'm tempted to stick with the two Puffers I have, but when it comes to breeding the lonely female is going to get pestered to heck. I also added a few more plants, and it seems to have cleared up the nitrate levels totally, so this tank is finally stable. I'm trying to do more of rough kinda looking plants to go with the fact that the Puffers are tiny fish with murder in their hearts. I need to take out the pennywort and transfer it into the 55gal cus it's a touch too whimsical for the look I'm going for. 😅
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I'm standing by my kitchen counter while drinking a cup of coke. It's past 3 a.m, I have a pretty important class by 7:30 am, can't seem to sleep because I'm worried about my boyfriend who touched a DEAD BAT out of nowhere and is driving to the nearest hospital without me because we don't live together (yet).
Today is a Monday. I like Mondays but I also think they are kind of overrated. Or at least overwhelming, since I always promise lots of things on Mondays, like they could magically change everything I hate about myself and my life. But I will actually do something different today.
I just drank my last cup of coke. I'm against this type of extremism – the thing is, I shouldn't be drinking it in the first place. I already had kidney problems caused by my poor diet and Coke addiction. Also, it's so expensive. There's no reason for me to drink it at all. It doesn't help me, it isn't even that good. The truth is: the bottle is there, I look at it, I'm used to drink it all the time, so I pour cup after cup til I look like a puffer fish. Other than that, I'm going through an orthodontic treatment and my dentist would be happy if fizzy drinks stopped being part of my life.
I wish I had a night routine. And a morning routine. I wish every single part of my day was planned and I wish I'd be able to follow the plan, which I know I ain't. The perfect morning routine would be: wake up at 5 am, feed my dog and change her water, make me some coffee, get the trash out, maybe exercise? what time would it be? 5:50? I live far away from college, so I need to hit the road by 6:30. If I exercise, I'd need to take a shower. Get myself ready to go, with everything I'll need in class, since I have lab and hospital practice in some days of the week. I need to get better at driving, so I'd take the car out and drive until somewhere I think is safe. Then my mom gets the car and drive to school. And I need to get there before 7:30 am most days. Like today, a Monday. And then I'll stay there til lunch, which is another problem, because I'm ASHAMED to bring my own food. Maybe because I'm overweight, maybe because I don't have any friends at college so I never go to the common room, where the fridge and microwave are located (I guess two truths can coexist). So I usually go to my boyfriend's house, which is 10 minutes from college. But if I used the common room, I'd have lots of time to study on lunch time. I think I'll try to do this. I need a lunch box.
Then comes the afternoon. I usually have classes until 4:30 pm. I don't get enough rest at night to feel super nice on midday, so I guess I should drink some coffee. After class I need to study for my internship and my tests and exams and seminars. Lots of stuff. I also have a relationship, and I love to spend time with my boyfriend. Besides this, I have not much time to do anything related to my health, and I can't even put into words how much I hate my body. I don't think there's anything I remotely like about it. I wish I could eat healthier and exercise and stretch and sleep 8 hours a day. I don't do any of those. I don't know how I am alive sometimes.
I like to study. I'm currently studying broiler production. I'm writing about the strategies we have for broilers stressed by high temperatures. I really want to work with chickens. I wish I had time to read more about it.
After everything, when I get home, I have three to four hours to study, take a bath, clean my house and prepare to sleep. Honestly, it feels almost impossible to do everything I should do.
Maybe if I had more money and lived closer. I don't really know how to get better time management, but I know I can't cope without it. I need to get better at lots of things if I want to live a long, fulfilling life.
It's 4 am. I'll get better to my reading and pray to sleep at least one hour. Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk, lol.
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