CW: Animal endangerment because I'm a fucking moron.
We went out to grab dinner and run an errand. I put my parrot, Nieshka, back in her cage and even moved her "wet food" (aka her fresh veggie chop mix) into her main food bowl because she hadn't been out much today and I usually only give her chop on her playstands.
I guess somewhere in the mix of rearranging food, putting on my jacket, and getting out the door, I forgot to actually CLOSE the cage. We got home and it was dark, and as I went to turn on the light suddenly there's this bird screaming at me. When I flipped on the light I could see she's been on walkabout- there was a lovely circle of poop the entire circuit through the dining/kitchen/living room where she likes to pace in circles. More worrying, there was a bunch by the front door, like she'd sat there for a really long time. (She poops... a lot. Consequences of a lot of fresh food, but also she seems to think it's a really great trick.)
She had one wing down when I first saw her. I thought it was broken at first, and my heart just about stopped. Then she tucked it up. I offered her my finger and she tried to step up, but her foot seemed really weak. I picked her up and inspected her for injuries-- didn't feel any broken bones or find any blood or puncture wounds, thankfully. (We have three indoor cats. That's why Nieshka has to be supervised on her evening jogs around the great room. They are all afraid of her, but I know how easily fear can turn to attack, or even just to 'I wonder if bird tastes good?' so they don't interact.)
As I was holding her, she seemed to get more strength in the leg/foot. I set her down on her cagetop stand and she went for her food immediately, then drank a bunch as well, also lending to the thought that she'd been down on the floor the whole time.
I think she probably let herself down for walkies a bit after we left, and circumnavigated the main floor until it got dark, at which point she settled somewhere to roost. I suspect that when we pulled up in the driveway she heard me, got startled/excited, and took off, then hit the window and scooted back over by the stairs. She doesn't seem tender when I touch wings/legs/head, and she's not seeming to be any more light sensitive than usual (she's like, 70% eyeball by volume, so she doesn't LOVE having light shined at her), so I am hoping really hard that she didn't give herself a concussion when/if she hit the window.
Meanwhile, I've got her in a small, dark, warm hospital cage (her airline carrier), and she seems puzzled but okay, except for a few wobbles. (To be fair, she is the least graceful bird I have ever met. She's a potato with wings, and has the grace of a rock dropped off an overpass. I debate all the time about clipped wings vs. unclipped, but fall on the side of unclipped because she lands better fully flighted. When I brought her home clipped, she'd drop out of the air and skid across the floor if she decided to go for a flight.) If anything is wrong it will have to be vetted tomorrow anyway, because there's not a single emergency vet in the entire DC area that treats birds.
I'm aware every time I hold her that birds aren't domesticated. Yes, she's handraised, and obviously tame, but essentially she's bonded to me as part of her flock. This is, at heart, a beautiful little wild creature that lets me kiss her head and tickle her toes and speak to her in a language she mimics because I'm too dumb to learn to speak hers. As a bird, she's not what one would call "majestic"-- she's short, round, and only vaguely aerodynamic in the sense that she has wings and her head is smaller than her belly. But as a companion, she's a pink and purple toddler with problem solving skills and a mind of her own, and she chooses to be my friend, in whatever capacity she recognizes that relationship. That's amazing to me. I signed on for 20-40 years of her stomping her feet and screaming when she's happy and pooping on me, and I'd pretty much never forgive myself if my stupid, stupid inattention meant that she got injured.
Which is why it's midnight, and I'm still awake and watching her. She seems fine, just a little upset and maybe slightly wobbly still. She stepped up from finger to finger (meaning she had to use both feet), she ate more, and she would like OUT of the tiny dark box, please.
I'm rambling. This is all just a really longwinded way of saying I forgot to close my bird's cage when I left the house, and I think she might have a mild concussion but I have no way to have her looked at right now, and I feel like the worst pet owner in the world. (Which my cat, Loki, would like to confirm, because I held him down and made him take a laxative earlier. I am clearly a monster.)
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All The Lessons I Never Learned
4. Unknowns
Synopsis: Loki decides to try to bond with his brother and gets a tour of the tot's playroom.
Word count: 2,159
Stand Alone?: Nope!
Warnings: Potty training/diapers
Notes: The Team Thor shorts are so integral to this fic. If you haven't already watched them, oh my gosh please go find them on Youtube
Read on AO3!
Loki felt awfully bad for crushing his poor mother’s heart but… he was hardly taking care of himself. What in gods’ names made them think he could take this on?
And then Loki had a second, much scarier thought:
What would happen if he didn’t?
Thor could get sent to a littles home alone.
His mother could get hurt.
She could die.
He could get cut out of the family.
He could get cut off from his family’s money.
He could finally get fired from the company.
And then what would happen? He’d be on an even worse path than he was now.
But… maybe there was something worse on this end. Maybe Thor would be too much. Maybe this would be a fate worse than death.
There was only one way to test that theory.
Loki swallowed his pride, put on a happy face, and trudged back upstairs to Odin’s office.
“Loki!” Thor spit out his pacifier and set down his crayons with a thunk onto the coloring book he was working on to run up and hug his brother. “Loki, um daddy hep colow and on big business call so be real quiet, kay?”
Loki snickered at the loud way Thor spoke despite his words, as Odin shooed them out of the office room and held a finger to his lips.
Once the door was shut, Loki held his brother’s hand. “So do I get a tour of your playroom, now, like you promised?” he asked.
“Uh-huh!”
Thor led him down one of the flights of stairs to a big room that the original designers had probably intended to be either another office, or perhaps a bar.
When Loki had lived there, it had been both.
It was much larger than Odin’s current office, but in those previous years, before internet conferencing had become mainstream, that extra space had been necessary for meetings and nights with close friends when there were three or four kids in the house.
Now, it was unrecognizable to Loki in the most magnificent way.
And the best part was that he could immediately tell almost everything he needed to know about Thor’s headspace from looking at it.
The cabinets which had once lined the south wall, the first thing Thor pointed out, had been entirely ripped out and replaced with a wooden play kitchenette, and plenty of furniture for games of house, as well as a playstand made for Thor’s size. Loki was shocked at the sheer amount of baby-doll furniture Thor kept-- it covered an entire corner of the massive room.
“Dis ‘s Mjollnir. He’s my dolly.” The little took a coiled, 6 foot long, slightly faded, red snake plush out of the white play highchair and showed it to Loki, who recognized it from when he was a child, too. Thor kept it cradled in his arms as if it were a baby as he moved onto the next section of the room.
Loki made a mental note that Thor did, in fact, have a proper doll. A fabric one, custom-made to look like him, too, but he did not seem to care, and preferred using the snake instead.
In many pieces of doll furniture, where a doll’s legs would’ve gone through different holes, like on the highchair and baby carrier, there was a stretchy, mesh pouch so the snake didn’t fall through as replacement.
On the back wall, the one furthest to Loki but adjacent to the pretend-play stuff, there was a good sized indoor play structure for the active little, with a slide, a swing, and plenty of vinyl mats and soft, padded shapes for tumbling.
Thor made sure to demonstrate how impressive it all was for Loki by climbing, sliding, falling, and trying to play hide-and-seek in the structure.
Loki’s eyes scanned over to his left as Thor got up and bounced over there. There was a toy organizer, absolutely filled to the brim with different, toddler and preschool friendly items, and then a lovely train table with a large junction of Thomas-The-Tank-Engine toys.
Loki remembered hearing about when Thor had gotten the impressive table and how excited Odin had been about it. Thor had played with it every time they went to the toy store and begged for it, and then apparently hadn’t touched it since that Christmas morning.
Frigga had laughed and laughed about the whole thing. There were a couple things she spent good money on when it came to Thor: The playground, the things in his bedroom, and the kitchenette, but everything else had been cheap. Money was no object to them, but there were plenty of places in Thor’s toy collection when the cheap had greatly outdone the expensive. Just like in the case of the doll and the train set.
Loki quite liked the next part of the room, not only because it was near the end of his tour, but because it was a massive, cushioned, pile of pillows and blankets in front of a big tv in the hollowed center of a built-in wall bookshelf, filled with movies, games, and more bins of toys like Duplo and wooden building blocks.
“This my timeout spot,” Thor said, a little less enthusiastically, pointing at the final corner of the room. It was also covered with pillows and plush animals and blankets, but surrounded by a large princess canopy that hung from the ceiling and could surround a bed.
“This? Really? This is your timeout spot?” Loki didn’t mean to be rude, but seriously? Make this lovely space a spot for punishment?
Thor nodded.
“Can’t be, this is a lovely reading nook.”
“No id isn’t! Silly bubba!” Thor chuckled.
“Oh, but it is! Isn’t it just the prettiest?” Loki asked, twirling the mosquito netting in his fingers and examining the crown of it before sitting down inside. “Pick out a story and come sit with me, and I’ll read it to you.” Loki patted a spot next to him, but instead, Thor brought him a story and then sat right in his lap. No wonder mother could no longer care for him with her fragile bones, Loki thought as he pretended the weight didn't bother him.
He put an arm around Thor's midsection and held the picture book awkwardly in one outstretched hand, refusing to sit up straighter so he could tuck his head over his brother's shoulder. Instead, he chose to attempt to decipher the words from an almost uncomfortable distance, as Thor had chosen one of those story books that begins as a simple sentence and adds more and more every single page to make one massive tongue twister for the adult reading at the end. It didn't help much that the story was entirely in Norwegian. But what did he expect? It was the language of the country and the language of family.
“Thor, do you speak English?” Loki asked when he had closed the book. He remembered Thor learning it in elementary and middle school, but had he retained it? He’d need it if he was coming home with Loki.
Thor nodded. “Mhm!” To prove himself, he spoke English for the first time that Loki had ever heard (aside from his “hello”s of course), “Teach n’ school! N’ with daddy,” he nodded. His English was about on the same level as his Norwegian: Generally about what you’d expect from a three year old, with mix-matched tenses, off pronunciations, a lisp which seemed to come and go when he spoke too fast, and cadence that sometimes slurred together to make a two-to-three word sentence sound like one big word, and with some missing or misplaced articles.
“That’s very impressive,” Loki replied. “Daddy teaches you?”
“Yeah. I listen. Good listena.”
“You’re a very good listener from what I’ve seen.”
Thor got up after that and walked away to his toys, thinking the conversation over.
“Where are you going?” Loki asked, following him and putting the book away, while he was at it.
“Makin’ lunch,” Thor said, as he opened and shut the wooden doors in his play kitchen, switching back to his native tongue. “Sit!” he commanded Loki.
There was no dining table in Thor’s pretend-play area, so Loki sat on the ground, crisscrossed, while Thor took care of the toy snake and made his brother some lunch out of fake, wooden fruits and vegetables, which Loki graciously accepted and set on the floor at his feet.
“So is ‘house’ your favorite game?” Loki asked as he set the plate aside.
“Yeah cuz’ jus like mumma.”
“I don’t remember mother ever cooking.”
“Jus like a mumma,” Thor corrected himself.
Loki nodded. Thor was imitating the image of mothers he had seen in storybooks and on television. “You don’t want to be like daddy?”
“No. Daddy’s boring.”
“Daddy’s boring? With all his office work?”
“Mhm.”
“You don’t want to be the rich businessman, going to work in an office everyday to provide for the family?” Loki asked in his most rehearsed, slightly mocking tone. Mimicking the things Odin had told him when he had first gotten his job and moved to the states.
Thor caught on and shook his head with a grin.
“Neither do I,” Loki whispered like this was a big secret. Maybe he could get along with this little better than he thought.
Around that time, maybe a few minutes later, as Loki continued to observe his brother’s play and ask plenty of questions, Frigga knocked on the door and poked her head inside.
“Are we ready for naptime?” she asked.
Loki looked at his brother, currently putting Mjolnir the snake down in the doll cradle.
Thor then looked rather sadly at his mother, and shook his head.
“He doesn’t seem all that tired to me,” Loki commented. “Do you think we could let him forgo? Just for today so he can spend some time with his cool big brother who never visits?”
“Yah! Bi’ bubba stay,” Thor agreed.
Frigga gave her sons a severe look, but Loki was too busy being pleased with the reputation he was earning as the admired and cool older brother. “Well, if he misses his nap now, then we’ll need to move bedtime up an hour. How does 6:30 sound?” She asked. “Right after dinner so you can go night-night with a full tummy?”
This tactic was incredibly effective. Thor’s eyes widened and he shook his head.
“Well, it’s that or a nap now, so you choose.”
The option proved too much for the little one, and Thor began to go red and cry.
Loki had not seen his brother have a tantrum in quite a long time, so when the little began to yell and fuss, he couldn’t help but be at least a bit surprised.
Thor threw himself onto the floor and thrashed defensively. The display could’ve been comical if Loki was not stuck in the center of it.
“...Is this common?” he whispered to his mother.
“We’re working on it,” she replied, seemingly unphased.
“Thor,” she spoke in a calm voice, and getting, in Loki’s opinion, dangerously close to the little. “Why are we angry? Or maybe we’re sad? Why do we feel like that?”
Thor spoke in a yell, muddled by snot and tears and heavy, frustrated, and exhausted breaths. “Wanna pway wit’ Loki!” Tears kept coming after that, but he was slightly softer.
Loki couldn’t help but feel a little bit honored and took a second to mull it over before stepping over and crouching down like his mother was. “I’ll be right here to keep playing after your nap, brother,” he said in a similarly calm tone to Frigga. “It’s just like when I stepped away and left you with daddy, right? You can step away and leave me with mother. I know you’ll come back for me.”
Thor nodded and began to still, setting his thumb in his mouth in a desperate attempt to self soothe, which Frigga let him have as Loki helped the both of them up.
“Darling, before we get you all cozy, do you need to use the potty?” she asked.
Thor shook his head.
“Can I check?”
Another shake of the head, a little more anxiously this time.
“I can step out if that makes it more comfortable,” Loki quickly added.
“Actually, can you set out the changing supplies in his room for me when you go? Did Thor show you where they were? Next to the dresser?”
“He did.”
Thor whined, embarrassed by his mother as she wiggled his pants down to check on his pull-up, and at that moment, to spare his brother’s dignity, Loki left to find that bag of changing supplies and laid them out for his mother and Thor, before exiting the room, grabbing one of the thick books out of his own chambers, and finding a cozy spot in one of the many sitting rooms to pass a few chapters by him.
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