#places we won't walk
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Good night to you all, amazing people! 🖤🌙
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this disability pride month, stop making jokes about people in wheelchairs standing up or walking.
can I stand and walk? sure, for a short while and with pain. the consequences for trying to be out all day without a wheelchair are that I'll be in bed for the rest of the week, too tired and in too much pain to move.
but the government won't give me my own wheelchair because they have the same attitude as these jokes - I can stand up, so I don't need one. exercise is good for you, you should walk!
it keeps me trapped in the house, unable to do anything more than short stints anywhere without borrowing or hiring a wheelchair - one that causes me pain to sit in and relies on someone to push me (usually with difficulty), because they're not going to have a high-end chair for that sort of thing.
it's not a miracle that a wheelchair user can stand or walk. it's something we should aspire to see more often.
#disability#disability pride month#chronic fatigue#fibromyalgia#cfs/me#post exertional malaise#like fucking hell people we should really be long past this by now#why am I seeing these bullshit jokes on my dash in twenty fucking twenty three#i did a short walk to a cafe yesterday because I thought I was up to it#and my right leg has seized up#my ankle can barely take my weight and my hip won't move properly#also lol I almost certainly have hEDS but cannot persuade a doctor to give me a referral#in summary#stop being fucking dense#i would rather people who don't need mobility aids use them than have people struggle because they don't want to be seen as a faker#or have people think that you have to reach a certain level of severity before you need it#also if I had a wheelchair I would bring my cat with me more places but that's by the by
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speak of the f*cking devil
#tv: biography of a villain#biography of a villain#evilive#evillive#shin ha kyun#shin hakyun#kim young kwang#bae na ra#bae nara#kdrama#local gay watches k-dramas.txt#i literally just wrote these tags and then they crushed my son like a soda can at the scrapyard then gutted him i'm distraught#not Do Young's number being the one open on the screen before everything ended bby noooooo#but Do Young. f*cking Do Young he calls Oh Jae and he won't pick up and he drains his glass but there's something he does with#his face right after and yk. yk he knows something isn't right. he gets on edge he walks to the living room and we get an inverse#P&P 2005 Darcy hand shot. extremely f*cked up now bc of the context but still#and now there are f*cking hitmen crawling through the place. aight
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#sorry for being so afk recently#it probably won't change#i haven't had a calm moment since mid-December and it's starting to gnaw at my brain#and now the only irl place where I felt somewhat happy is falling apart bc of in-group-politics#it's so annoying#can't we just all breathe for a second?#can't everyone stop being passive aggressive assholes to each other for FIVE FUCKING MINUTES?#i don't want to pick sides#i don't want this stupid group to break apart#something has been feeling off since October and last week my friend and I finally put our finger on it#and BOY figuring it out has.not.helped.#meanwhile all I've been doing has been watching old races from the 90s#bc the only thing that makes my brain shut up at the moment is cars going vroom in a circle for 1.5hrs apparently#every irl interaction atm feels like walking on egg shells#and the only thing that's stopping me from crying every time i get home is just keeping myself busy and not thinking abt my life ever#anyway my insurance has blocked me from therapy for the next 3 years so that's great#.....i don't want to come on here and just complain but nothing has been going right recently.#maybe i'll be back to normal eventually but not at the moment#not for a while
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...
#so in some fairly big personal news: boyfriend accepted a new job!#we are leaving the goddamn cornfields and okay prairie behind for the hills and rivers of pittsburgh pa!#i am so excited about many many many aspects of this#a little daunted by the cost of living change but i think it'll be well worth it for a real airport. and theatre. and neighborhoods.#and actual bagels and a bigger jewish community#and just to live in a place that i maybe won't walk around wishing i could just go 'home' in some ambiguous way all the time#also being back on east coast time#and did i mention bagels and shows?#is this the real life?#stars + steel city
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Coming to Fun Realizations here as we scroll the BF Ao3 tag. The Bug Fables fandom on here... has genuinely gotten a whole lot less hostile since we first joined up? Like, it might just be that we're either blocked or been blocked by everyone who's started shit, but it's genuinely gotten a LOT nicer to be here in the years since we've joined.
We look at the Archive, and we see stuff that would've sparked up a whole shitshow and a bunch of vagueposts over nothing only a year or so ago just... passing without comment.
It's one of those things where we have to sit for a moment and wonder, like... some of our usual patterns of behavior to try and avoid discourse might be unnecessary. We've said shit we're accustomed to getting us at least one person getting mad in our comments or replies and it's passed with nothing. We haven't seen a bad faith take in the tag for months! It's a bit weird to realize!
#we speak#we are used to having to be a cockroach who simply doesnt leave and this makes it a bit weird to like#be here and realize that wow! we won't get people actively harassing us for trying to say we don't like treating vi like a child!#we feel like we have been in the meat grinder for years and now someones telling us “yeah they actually took out the meat grinding”#“yeah you can walk in this place without dying now”#its just. huh! some of our criticisms of the fandom may genuinely be obsolete and thats fucking wild to think about#we have outlived many of the parts of the fandom that shaped us! huh!#bizarre
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Yesterday I went Places and did Things
And Jon asked if I was trying to be Revolver Ocelot with my red beret and I was like, no, my jacket is black, not brown. I am just a chick in a hat
#i can't handle a gun for shit i am the farthest thing from Revolver Ocelot#i ain't even pistol puma#or tommy gun tiger#mod post#mod pic#toronto#we met jon's family for lunch and then walked a lot and went to the glasses place to order jon's new glasses#ordered some nice titanium frames for jon thay hopefully won't break easily like most of his glasses ever
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Hey y’all! Do you have any recommendations for walkers or rollators that are foldable and can be converted to wheelchairs?
This question brought to you by today’s POTS flareup that has my heartrate jumping to the high 130s every time I stand up but I need to go grocery shopping. I sometimes need to sit down to let my heartrate come back down, but A. it tends to alarm people in the grocery store when I sit on the floor to catch my breath, B. it’s hard to get off the floor on bad blood pressure days, and C. if it converts to a wheelchair, when I hit the “okay no more walking” stage my family can wheel me along with them without having to have the “our faces are uncomfortably close to each other while you push me backwards through a store” experience of a rollator
Heck, maybe one of those like shopping bags on wheels with a fold down seat? Being pulled behind my brother like luggage would be weird but would be a safer way to get me back out to the car than trying to get me both into and out of a shopping cart without falling
#the person behind the yarn#last time this happened (also at a grocery store) it turned out to be blood sugar related not blood pressure#but both can be 'okay you will stop walking RIGHT NOW'#which is less than ideal when you are. you know. at a grocery store getting groceries#because if you're clothes shopping or something it still sucks and it's kind of a jerk move to leave the cart behind full of stuff#but the stuff won't be ruined for being left behind in the middle of the store. they can still sell it#can't do that with a lot of groceries#oh hey if I had one of these I could probably start joining my dad on his walks!#there's lots of little trails he likes to go take walks on#but while they aren't that long are fully paved and start and end at the same parking lot#if my blood pressure crashes halfway through he can't get me back to the car without hurting himself#my dad could probably carry me but also has a chronic shoulder injury that means he really really shouldn't#so I just don't go on those walks with him#pre-pandemic when we went to zoos or places like that we'd walk for the morning then when I got tired we'd rent a wheelchair#but that's not really an option at the grocery store unfortunately#so maybe it's time I get one of my own
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there were so many pretty flowers !!!!! <3
#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚#today wahh okay we're leaving na bcs we're headed someplace else for our vacation#so it is. cold weather -> hot weather LMFAO#GOING TO THE BEACH IN DECEMBER IS KINDA SILLY TBH#woa. the cold weather is so nice#tbh i felt like almost fainting a while ago bcs god it was so. hot and cold and it was kinda so ... bad#tbf we were walking around a lot and in a hurry :')#also im SO CUTE literally obsessed w myself even if its just morning and i'm already exhausted#SORRY BTW im posting a lot about Real Life. i know i can literally post about wtvr i want but yk <3#tbh so far our little trip has been pretty wild uhm. some bad stuff happening#I WON'T SAY WHAT bcs it's a little tmi. oops! but yeah it's a mix of good w some bad stuff happening#but i won't let any of it ruin our trip !!!!! <3 i'll just enjoy myself w/o worrying#very fun trying to guess which flowers are which hehe. i at least know that we saw sunflowers. and asters i think!#rlly wna go back to That place sometime again. this whole#this whole place in general tbh bcs we're only here for a short while sobbing
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youtube
#music tbt#augh....#Yesterday I noticed when I was about to go on for a walk my shoes became too small#You may laugh at me if I tell you such a thing#Keep going and don't stop#Keep going towards the place we long for#Keep going while hesitating#Keep going towards the lights#The shoes that became smaller I said farewell to them#Though I won't stop I will always wait for you
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What would a true narrative foil to Ichiban look like? (Don’t say Aoki)
how are you going to ask me to give you a narrative foil and then tell me to not give you the existing narrative foil
#snap chats#literally anything i could say aoki contrasts to ichiban THE GAMES TITLE IN JAPAN IS LITERALLY LIGHT AND DARKNESS#ICHIBAN LITERALLY REFERS TO HIMSELF AS THE DARKNESS AND AOKI THE LIGHT VERBATIM IDK HOW MORE FOIL WE CAN GET#like what do you want me to say that's not just listing aoki's characteristics LMAO#sure i'll do it anyway#where ichiban sincerely values his friends and people 'his foil' would use and discard them at their leisure#where ichiban is open and accepting to people of all walks of life and doesn't care what status or background someone has#'his foil' would only respect people that society and- by extension himself- would decree as respectable#where ichiban grew up in the 'slums' of society 'his foil' would be raised in a place of#i won't say 'privilege' specifically referring to aoki because he WAS disabled#but at the very least he had a more stable upbringing#and because of these attributes they IMMENSELY highlight each other's philosophies and characteristics and motivations#yk. like a foil.
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not to sound dramatic or anything but magic is real and I know its real because I swore a contract w the spiders in my room about a year ago to never purposefully harm them or let them come to harm so long as they ate all the other bugs in my room and now anytime someone purposefully kills a spider near me I am momentarily possessed and have to literally restrain myself from tackling the person who did it
#this post is meant to be silly but to be clear i am AFRAID of spiders#so for me to now have a knee jerk reaction to injure MYSELF to protect a spider as a result of an ''agreement'' is. fascinating#like. did i make an actual contract w these spiders? im cool w it if so but i didnt think bodily possession would be included#the agreement is like a year and a half or so old at this point but honestly 10/10 would reccomend. i have almost no bugs in my room now#and i actually see LESS spiders than i did before#we are now Allies#anyways this post was prompted by finding the biggest fucking spider crawling up my sock#and having the mental fortitude to force my fear down like i literally swallowed it and took her outside#normally if they're small i just let them disappear (out of sight out of mind)#and if they're big (wolf spiders are common here) the rules are: if you aren't bothering me i won't bother you#like i had a spider (not wolf but similarly big) that lived in an unused closet for a while#and every morning he would crawl across my sharp shitty ceiling very slowly and then crawl back#and like. he wasn't bothering me. he was just going for a walk#however: touching me or my stuff is off limits#my bed and my desk and my body are places they are Not allowed#i dont kill them still obv but they will be escorted outside#the big big ones i always take outside bc they would die indoors anyways (not enough birds? or whatever they eat. theyre huge)#sorry i got carried away#swear agreements with the spiders in your house and profit#get possessed occassionally but its fine#i also have an unspoken contract with yellowjackets but nothing formal yet#one day when i have a yard ill have contracts w lots of stuff. yellowjackets and bees and stray cats and snakes and possums#i don't like talking to people but i do like creatures (so long as they aren't touching me (<- prone to the heeby jeebies))
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also the feeling of winning a politically based argument with my dad is soooo fucking good
#talking about bitchass sunak and how he's proposed a £5-10 fee for if u wanna go to the doctors#and i am EXTREMELY against that shit#the nhs is free for a fucking reason. nobody should have to drop a single PENNY to be able to live#anyway i said that (without the swears) and he started to tell me why actually it would “reduce nhs strain!!” cuz apparently ppl just go to#the hospital to “get out of the cold”#and then i said but dad you see how that's entirely another problem. to solve that problem you fix the cold ???????#(ie. drop heating bills. like come ON it doesn't take a 200IQ to figure that out)#at this point he walks outta the room and closes the door. reopens the door upon me yelling that he was avoiding saying im right#then he comes back and tells me (very patronisingly) that coming out of the cold means just coming into hospital with unnecessary problems#to which i said well i have not heard of anyone doing that (we are indian and won't go to the doctor unless like. we are fucking dying)#and he says you'll be surprised... and i was like ok. i bet its just ppl who are lonely. which again !! another problem entirely !!#and i said well putting the fee in place won't actually stop that. ppl who are lonely will keep being lonely#and maybe we'll see an increase in elderly suicides. or more reports of houses that people just stop coming out of#or MAYBE we'll start hearing reports of ppl who die of entirely treatable diseases and illnesses cuz they couldn't afford to go#or were in the middle of choosing between food for their kids and heating one (1) room and decided fuck it this recurring stomach ache#might just be menopause or whatever the fuck. i goes to my dad people play down symptoms all the TIME#and it starts from youth !!! from school !! we are told if u have a headache or a stomach ache just come in ^_^ its better than missing !!#like wtf. what kind of shit system is that. it feels horrible to come to school when people are very clearly ill#you deserve to be resting not suffering through a whole day in pain & not able to breathe & honestly u don't learn shit on those days#didn't tell my dad that. but. he responds by saying there's ppl whove said that stuff like milk bread eggs should be free. and i said yea#and bathroom products. by which i mean toilet paper and pads and tampons#and he was clearly expecting me to disagree with this because he said um ok. well yeah ! exactly#mans changed his tone SO fast once he figured out he was not winning this. it felt so good#i love being a semi adult in this household where despite always being treated like one not actually having the opinions to feel like one#anyway thats my storytime. moral of the story is basic necessities should be free. full stop
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this post is not gonna be well put together but i am having feelings
mean girls is trending right now because the musical movie just came out and i feel insane. idk why i do, it was stupid of me to think that most people Got It, no one ever gets it, it was always about the memes and the aesthetic.
the first mean girls movie was based on a nonfiction book called queen bees and wannabes. it interviewed and discussed the social hierarchy system in teen girl friendships. how they hold each other to these insane standards of heternormative femininity out of sheer terror that they won't meet those standards themselves. the way they leverage their relationships for some small degree of power in a world designed to strip them of it, even if it drags other girls down.
the "you can only wear your hair in a ponytail once a week and on wednesdays we wear pink" speech was not an original creation for the script. it's a QUOTE from a real teenage girl. those were REAL RULES.
then the musical came, and it was one step removed from the intended messaging of the film. OG mean girls was not perfect (and was extremely racist), but it said what needed said. the musical leaned on the comedy more, but still left a heartfelt undertone, and still critiqued the systems in place. of course no piece of media is going to be perfect, but it was about the conversation.
then this new movie comes out and it is washed over in the veneer of white hollywood feminism so thick you can't see anymore. the problematic aspects of the original movie are taken out to avoid "offending" when the offense was the point. it becomes toothless, it becomes some other thing entirely. they changed karen's line "i expect to run the world in shoes i cannot walk in" to "watch me as i run the world in shoes i cannot walk in." because choice feminism is in vogue, suddenly this character whose entire point is that she doesn't think deeply about WHY she does anything is suddenly hip to the fact that the world is against her.
i think of sokka losing his misogyny arc in the new atla. i think of the Heathers remake casting the bitchy, identical heathers as queer and hollywood-fat outcasts. as if the story, the meaning, the allegory is hidden in the sets and the jokes and the music. it's a whole new thing now, and it's a thing that means nothing in particular.
the plastics should not wear jeans. they should not have curves. their queerness should be suppressed, painful. their sexuality is not a slay, it's the only thing they think they have of value. the santa dance isn't sexy, it's shocking, it's mortifying - they are children.
they're not mean because "we are all mean." they are mean because they are girls in a world that brutalizes them and crushes them into a standardized shape. they are mean because the world is mean to them. they are mean because it gives them some power back. they are mean because it's the only weapon they have.
the landscape of femininity today has shifted to camera-ready makeup at the age of 10, stringent performative hygiene standards, and avoiding being caught on film while having a genuine emotion. the consumerism, the fatphobia, the racism, the classism, the homophobia remain. We could have had a conversation about that.
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A general cane guide for writers and artists (from a cane user, writer, and artist!)
Disclaimer: Though I have been using a cane for 6 years, I am not a doctor, nor am I by any means an expert. This guide is true to my experience, but there are as many ways to use a cane as there are cane users!
This guide will not include: White canes for blindness, crutches, walkers, or wheelchairs as I have no personal experience with these.
This is meant to be a general guide to get you started and avoid some common mishaps/misconceptions in your writing, but you absolutely should continue to do your own research outside of this guide!
This is NOT a medical resource!!! And never tell a real person you think they're using a cane wrong!
The biggest recurring problem I've seen is using the cane on the wrong side. The cane goes on the opposite side of the pain! If your character has even-sided pain or needs it for balance/weakness, then use the cane in the non-dominant hand to keep the dominant hand free. Some cane users also switch sides to give their arm a rest!
A cane takes about 20% of your weight off the opposite leg. It should fit within your natural gait and become something of an extension of your body. If you need more weight off than 20%, then crutches, a walker, or a wheelchair is needed.
Putting more pressure on the cane, using it on the wrong side, or having it at the wrong height can make it less effective, and can cause long term damage to your body from improper pressure and posture. (Hugh Laurie genuinely hurt his body from years of using a cane wrong on House!)
(some people elect to use a cane wrong for their personal situation despite this, everyone is different!)
(an animated GIF of a cane matching the natural walking gait. It turns red when pressure is placed on it.)
When going up and down stairs, there is an ideal standard: You want to use the handrail and the cane at the same time, or prioritize the handrail if it's only on one side. When going up stairs you lead with your good leg and follow with the cane and hurt leg together. When going down stairs you lead with the cane and the bad leg and follow with the good leg!
Realistically though, many people don't move out of the way for cane users to access the railing, many stairs don't have railings, and many are wet, rusty, or generally not ideal to grip.
In these cases, if you have a friend nearby, holding on to them is a good idea. Or, take it one step at a time carefully if you're alone.
Now we come to a very common mistake I see... Using fashion canes for medical use!
(These are 4 broad shapes, but there is INCREDIBLE variation in cane handles. Research heavily what will be best for your character's specific needs!)
The handle is the contact point for all the weight you're putting on your cane, and that pressure is being put onto your hand, wrist, and shoulder. So the shape is very important for long term use!
Knob handles (and very decorative handles) are not used for medical use for this reason. It adds extra stress to the body and can damage your hand to put constant pressure onto these painful shapes.
The weight of a cane is also incredibly important, as a heavier cane will cause wear on your body much faster. When you're using it all day, it gets heavy fast! If your character struggles with weakness, then they won't want a heavy cane if they can help it!
This is also part of why sword canes aren't usually very viable for medical use (along with them usually being knob handles) is that swords are extra weight!
However, a small knife or perhaps a retractable blade hidden within the base might be viable even for weak characters.
Bases have a lot of variability as well, and the modern standard is generally adjustable bases. Adjustable canes are very handy if your character regularly changes shoe height, for instance (gotta keep the height at your hip!)
Canes help on most terrain with their standard base and structure. But for some terrain, you might want a different base, or to forego the cane entirely! This article covers it pretty well.
Many cane users decorate their canes! Stickers are incredibly common, and painting canes is relatively common as well! You'll also see people replacing the standard wrist strap with a personalized one, or even adding a small charm to the ring the strap connects to. (nothing too large, or it gets annoying as the cane is swinging around everywhere)
(my canes, for reference)
If your character uses a cane full time, then they might also have multiple canes that look different aesthetically to match their outfits!
When it comes to practical things outside of the cane, you reasonably only have one hand available while it's being used. Many people will hook their cane onto their arm or let it dangle on the strap (if they have one) while using their cane arm, but it's often significantly less convenient than 2 hands. But, if you need 2 hands, then it's either setting the cane down or letting it hang!
For this reason, optimizing one handed use is ideal! Keeping bags/items on the side of your free hand helps keep your items accessible.
When sitting, the cane either leans against a wall or table, goes under the chair, or hooks onto the back of the chair. (It often falls when hanging off of a chair, in my experience)
When getting up, the user will either use their cane to help them balance/support as they stand, or get up and then grab their cane. This depends on what it's being used for (balance vs pain when walking, for instance!)
That's everything I can think of for now. Thank you for reading my long-but-absolutely-not-comprehensive list of things to keep in mind when writing or drawing a cane user!
Happy disability pride month! Go forth and make more characters use canes!!!
#mobility aid#cane user#writing tips#writing advice#drawing tips#art tutorial#art tips#art reference#art resources#art help#my art#long post
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Last year I bought a laptop stand at ikea. Just a cheap metal adjustable table so that I could sit in the workroom and write in the early mornings when I couldn't sleep and not disturb anyone else in the house. I haven't been able to use it so far (it's mostly been holding random things until I could get them sorted out). So tonight I pulled it out of the storage area that was once my workroom and brought it into the bedroom. My side of the room is now very cramped until I move thing around and make adjustments. Tomorrow I need to pull out my better laptop fan so that I'm ready to write when I get the chance; the workroom smells too much like smoke to want to spend more than a few minutes in there right now. Maybe tomorrow I'll have time.
#birdy tries to be a good adult#I've caught up on laundry and dishes and I'm ignoring cleaning the bathroom#tomorrow morning depending on how partner feels we might go walking#I'm going to see if they'll go with me this week for potting soil or if I'll have to go by myself#because if that's the case I'm going as soon as the place opens to avoid traffic#i also want to see if we can go to the garden center tomorrow and buy some color pack plants#there's a sale on companion plants and i want to fill in some empty spaces so i can avoid buying more mulch#however if mother in law comes along that probably won't happen so we'll see
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