Gavi: Hermano, you are so close to perfection.
Pedri: Oh really?!
Gavi: Yeah. Because you are right next to me.
Pedri:...
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We need a Pedri version to this
https://www.tumblr.com/leclercloml/725989724597125120/footballers-fake-message-part-5-pablo-gavi?source=share
Hello anon! Yes ofcourse I can!! here it is hope you like it 🫶🏻🫶🏻
Footballers | Fake Text Part 8
(Pedri Gonzalez edition)
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Pedri: "It's easy to forget what a sin is in the middle of a battlefield."
Gavi: Opposite over hypotenuse.
Gavi: Dipshit.
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Pedri: *sneezes*
Gavi: *fussing over him* I told you to put on more layers didn't I? but what did you do? not listen!
Balde: Hey Gavi I'm kinda cold too y'know.
Gavi: * while still fussing over Pedri* The F*ck do you want me to do?? light you on fire??
Balde: *disappointed but not surprised* this bitch 😒
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Gavi: Hey, can we stay in your dorm tonight?
Eric: Why?
Gavi: Pedri fiddled with an ouija board and cursed ours.
Ferran: Pedri doesn't know how to banish spirits, so he just throws salt at them and yell "DOES THIS LOOK LIKE A HOTEL TO YOU?!"
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Lewa: Precisamos distrair esses caras
Gavi: Deixe comigo
Gavi: Os centauros têm seis membros e, portanto, são insetos. Discutir.
Modric, Kroos e Camavinga: *Começam imediatamente a discutir*
Courtois, assistindo horrorizada: Oh, isso. Eu não gosto disso. Eu não gosto nada disso.
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Pedri: Gavi kissed me.
Eric: No!
Ferran: Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!
Pedri: It's unbelievable.
Ferran: Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!
Eric: Alright, we wanna hear everything. Ferran, get the wine and turn off the phones. Pedri, does this end well or do we need tissues?
Pedri: Ooooh it ended very well.
Ferran: Do not start without me!!
(meanwhile)
Gavi: And then I kissed Pedri.
Nico: Tongue?
Gavi: Yeah.
Ansu: Cool.
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Y/n: This food is too hot... I cant eat it.
Pedri: You’re very hot, and I still eat you.
Everyone at the table: *silence*
Gavi: One dinner... I just want ONE DINNER!
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I AM BEGGING YOU MORE GAVI OR PEDRI ONES 😭🙏🏼
Pedri : This totally sucks, man.
Pablo : This is horrible.
Pedri : Yeah, I know, I mean look at today’s news.
Pablo : No, it’s not that, it’s Y/n .
Pablo : It’s just like, I can’t get them out of my head and every time I look at them I have this pains in my chest, and I just know it’s their fault, that bitch!
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Pedri : Yesterday, I overheard Y/n saying “Are you sure this is a good idea?” and Pablo replying “Trust me,” and I have never moved from one room to another so quickly in my life.
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Pablo : Hey, do you know the password to Y/n ’s computer?
Pedri : Fuck you, Pablo .
Pablo : Hey!!
Pedri : No, you misunderstood, the password is "fuckyouPablo ".
Pablo : Oh, no numbers? Not very safe.
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Pablo : Can I get a waffle?
Pedri and Y/n : *fighting and yelling at each other*
Pablo : Can I p l e a s e get a waffle?
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Pedri , to y/n : I'll be under the mistletoe when you start feeling desperate!
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Pablo : Y/n ... you've been cuddling with me for over and hour now.
Y/n : *muffled* mm hmmm :)
Pablo : Fuck. I should be annoyed but you're adorable.
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Pedri: Violence isn't the answer.
Gavi: You're right.
Pedri: *sighs in relief*
Gavi: Violence is the question.
Pedri: What?
Gavi, bolting away: And the answer is yes.
Pedri, running after Him: NO-
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Gavi: So… I’ve seen you’ve been spending a lot of time with y/n recently.
Pedri: No, Pablo, it's not what it looks like, I swear.
Gavi: Oh really? So no reason for me to be jealous?
Pedri: No! You’re the only one for me.
Gavi: Is that so?
Pedri: I promise! Y/n and I are just dating, okay? They’re my partner.
Gavi: So there are no best-friends-feelings involved?
Pedri: You are still my one and only best friend! They’re just the love of my life, nothing more!
Gavi: But I’m still the platonic love of your life, right?
Pedri: Of course bro!
Gavi: Bro...
Y/n: What the-
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Pablo: What's the actual word for cow juice?
Y/n: Cow what?
Pedri: Milk. He means milk.
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Y/n: Name a more iconic duo than my crippling fear of abandonment and my anxiety. I'll wait.
Pedri : You and me!!!
Y/n, tearing up: Okay.
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