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amphibious-thing · 2 years

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Was is the surviving evidence of what it was like for queer people in valley forge?

Great question, from a pantsless flaming shots party to a sodomy trial there is quite a bit to talk about, so I'm going to break my answer up into sections.

Prominent Historical Figures

Alexander Hamilton and John Laurens

If you’re reading this you probably already know who these two are so I won't go into too much detail. Hamilton and Laurens at the time of the Valley Forge encampment were both aide-de-camp to George Washington. The two later exchanged a series of love letters that are still extant. Washington’s aides, or military family, as they were known, lived together, worked together and slept together.

There is notably a myth that George Washington let Hamilton and Laurens share a cabin at Valley Forge and that this is evidence of him being a LGBT ally. However the reality is that the army was tight on space, so many solders were required to share sleeping quarters. Platonic bed sharing was also incredibly common in 18th century America. If Washington was aware of a sexual relationship between the two he left no evidence of this knowledge. I have a ridiculously long post talking about this myth and Hamilton and Laurens sleeping arrangements at Valley Forge if you’re into that sort of thing.

While the fact that men were not only socially permitted to share a bed but often required to share sleeping quarters may at first seem like good thing for men looking to have sex with other men, the reality is these sleeping quarters were often tight, with multiple men in each cabin. The aides (approximately 7-9 men) more than likely all slept in either a single cabin together or 1-2 rooms in the Potts house. For enlisted men the sleeping quarters were even tighter with 12 men to a cabin. This left little privacy for most men at Valley Forge. However men of higher rank often had their own sleeping quarters, for example Washington had a room to himself at the Potts house, only having to share with his wife when she arrived.

Baron von Steuben (and Benjamin Walker)

Baron von Steuben was a Prussian soldier who had left Europe due in part to avoid rumours about his sexual proclivities. He arrived in America on the 1st of December 1777, with letters from the American ministers in France that somewhat exaggerated his qualifications. He arrived at Valley Forge on the 24th of February. While his qualifications were exaggerated his skill was not and he was appointed Inspector General. On arriving in America Steuben spoke German, Russian and French but could only say “goddamn” in English. As both Hamilton and Laurens were fluent in French they were appointed to work with the Baron, and the three men became friends. (The Drillmaster of Valley Forge by Paul Lockhart p31-79)

To train the troops Steuben put together a model company of 150 men, he selected 20 men out if the group who he would teach the manoeuvres to, they in turn would each teach another group of men until the whole model company knew the manoeuvres. These men could then teach others and so-on. The model company were ordered to the first grand parade on Thursday the 19th of March. (Lockhart p97-104 ; General Orders 17 & 18 March 1778) It was on this first day that Steuben met Benjamin Walker. William North (who would later become romantically involved with both Steuben and Walker) tells the story in his Biographical Sketch of the late Baron Steuben:

At the first parade, the troops neither understanding the command, nor how to follow in a changement to which they had not been accustomed, even with the instructor at their head, were getting fast into confusion. At this moment, Captain, now Colonel Walker, then of the 2d New-York Regt., advanced from his platoon, and offered his assistance to translate the orders, and interpret to the troops. If, said the Baron, I had seen an angel from Heaven, I should not have been more rejoiced. The officers in the army who spoke English and French fluently, were indeed very few in number-how few were so capable of giving assistance to the Baron, in the formation of his system. Walker became, from that moment, his aid-de-camp, and remained to the end of the Baron's life, his dear and most worthy friend.

(The American Magazine, Oct 1815, p181)

William Benemann in his book Male-Male Intimacy in Early America comments that while Steuben was “attracted to his “angel” Benjamin Walker”, Walker “does not appear to have been sexually interested.” (p102-103) Considering Walker would later become involved with North his seeming lack of sexual interest in Steuben was presumably not due to a lack of interest in men.

The Pantsless Flaming Shots Party

Much has been made of the pantsless flaming shots party, as it has been dubbed. All we really know of the party comes from Steuben’s secretary Pierre Du Ponceau. Steuben had met the 17-year-old linguist at the house of Pierre Beaumarchais in France. As Du Ponceau was fluent in English and keen for an adventure Steuben brought him along to America.

In his autobiography Du Ponceau recalls the “dismal winter that we spent at Valley Forge”, how they were “in want of provisions, of clothes, of fodder for our horses, in short of every thing.” Despite the conditions they made the best of it.

Once with the Baron's permission, his aids invited a number of young officers to dine at our quarters, on condition that none should be admitted that had on a whole pair of breeches. This was understood of course, as pars pro toto, but torn clothes were an indispensable requisite for admission and in this the guests were very sure not to fail. The dinner took place; the guests clubbed their rations, and we feasted sumptuously on tough beef steaks and potatoes with hickory nuts for our dessert. In lieu of wine, we had some kind of spirits with which we made Salamanders; that is to say, after filling our glasses, we set the liquor on fire, and drank it up flame and all. Such a set of ragged and, at the same time, merry fellows were never before brought together. The Baron loved to speak of that dinner, and of his sans culottes as he called us.

So the pantsless party was not exactly pantsless, however as “sans culottes” literally means “without breeches” perhaps some men did go pantsless.

While we don’t exactly have a guest list, there has been plenty of speculation over who attended this party. Many of the suspected guests are queer men (Benjamin Walker, Alexander Hamilton, John Laurens). That being said we really don’t know who was in attendance besides Steuben and Du Ponceau.

Romantic Friendship

When thinking about what Valley Forge was like for queer people we have to consider the border historical context and part of that context is romantic friendship. In colonial America same-sex romantic relationships were more-or-less socially acceptable so long as they were both a) non-sexual and b) didn’t interfere with heterosexual marriage. In her book Charity and Sylvia: A Same-Sex Marriage in Early America, Rachel Hope Cleves explains:

Romantic friendships did not often provoke a community’s concerns about illicit sexuality, in part because sexual feelings were not strictly coupled with romantic feelings the way they would be later in the nineteenth century. Men and women could experience and express emotional intimacy in a wide variety of relationships … friends who expressed passionate love for each other were free from suspicion unless they gave reasons for concern. Concerns arose when friendships seemed to interfere with marital futures. (p41)

While the idealised concept of romantic friendship was non-sexual, in reality that was not aways the case. Emma Donoghue explains in her book Passions Between Women; “It is crucial to distinguish between the dominant ideology’s explanation of romantic friendship - that it was sexless, morally elevating, and no threat to male power - and the reality of such bonds”. (p122) Cleves explains that “same-sex intimacies” were not “always platonic. Romantic friendship created scope for a wide variety of strong feelings, including trust, pity, love, jealousy, happiness, and eros. Historical research reveals that the intimacy between female friends could extend to sex.” (p41) The same is clearly true for male friends.

It’s also important to remember that just because romantic friendship was generally socially acceptable does not mean it was universally accepted. While some praised romantic friendship as a form of pure non-sexual love others saw the potential for sexual intimacy and condemned it as a gateway to sodomy and sapphism. Donoghue explains that the same pair “could be idealised as romantic friends by one observer and suspected of unnatural acts by another, or even in some cases idealised and suspected by the same person.” (p161)

One example of a romantic friendship between two soldiers during the Revolutionary War is Bulkley and Newman who’s relationship was covered in Anecdotes of the Revolutionary War in America by Alexander Garden. Garden describes their “singular and romantic friendship” in the most flattering terms:

from early infancy united by such a congeniality of sentiment, that it almost appeared as if one soul gave animation to both. Their attachment increased with their years—it strengthened with their strength. As school-fellows they were inseparable; their task was the same, and he who was first perfect in acquiring it, was unhappy till he had impressed it, with equal force, on the mind of his friend.

When the war broke out Bulkley and Newman joined the Army together.

The officers of the Legion, who yet survive, can testify, that through all the perils and difficulties of the Southern War, each seemed more anxious for the safety and alleviation of the sufferings of his friend, than of his own. In action they invariably fought side by side; in the more tranquil scenes of encampment, they were constantly engaged in the same pursuits; their toils and their pleasures were the same.

They were both mortally wounded at Quinby “they fell on the same spot, and, with united hands, reciprocating kindness to the last, expired.”

While I’m unsure weather Bulkley and Newman were at Valley Forge, this goes to show how romantic friendships between soldiers were often seen by others.

Sodomy Cases

In his research into sodomy cases of the time William Benemann found that out of the "3,315 cases listed by James C. Neagles in his index of Revolutionary War courts-martial, only two can be identified as sodomy prosecutions." (William Benemann, Male-Male Intimacy in Early America p72) The Frederick Gotthold Enslin case and the John Anderson case. The Enslin case took place during the Valley Forge encampment. The Anderson case occurred in 1792 after the war had ended however I think it's still of interest.

Frederick Gotthold Enslin

On the 27th of February 1778 a Brigade Court Martial was held. Aaron Burr served as President. Ensign Anthony Maxwell of Colonel Malcom’s Regiment was tried “for propagating a scandalous report prejudicial to the character of Lieutt Enslin”. The General Orders of the 3rd of March 1778, reports:

The Court after maturely deliberating upon the Evidence produced could not find that Ensign Maxwell had published any report prejudicial to the Character of Lieutt Enslin further than the strict line of his duty required and do therefore acquit him of the Charge.

On the 10th of March Lieutenant Frederick Gotthold Enslin was brought to trail. The General Orders of the 14th of March 1778, reports:

At a General Court Martial whereof Coll Tupper was President (10th March 1778) Lieutt Enslin of Coll Malcom’s Regiment tried for attempting to commit sodomy, with John Monhort a soldier; Secondly, For Perjury in swearing to false Accounts, found guilty of the charges exhibited against him, being breaches of 5th Article 18th Section of the Articles of War and do sentence him to be dismiss’d the service with Infamy—His Excellency the Commander in Chief approves the sentence and with Abhorrence & Detestation of such Infamous Crimes orders Lieutt Enslin to be drummed out of Camp tomorrow morning by all the Drummers and Fifers in the Army never to return; The Drummers and Fifers to attend on the Grand Parade at Guard mounting for that Purpose.

The 5th Article 18th Section of the Articles of War reads as follows:

All crimes not capital, and all disorders and neglects which officers and soldiers may be guilty of, to the prejudice of good order and military discipline, though not mentioned in the above articles of war, are to be taken cognizance of by a general or regimental court-martial, according to the nature and degree of the offence, and be punished at their discretion.

(Journals of the Continental Congress, v5 p807)

Enslin was drummed out on the 15th. At least three men recorded this event in their diaries.

Captain Paul Brighham writes:

on 15th Sunday Lt [Inslee?]* was Brake and Deumd out of Camp By all the Drums and Fifes in the army Some thing curious

* This is presumably Enslin as the details match. Edward A. Hoyt who edited and published this could not identify who it was. (see Vermont History, v34, p19, n46)

Lieutenant James McMichael writes:

I this morning proceeded to the grand parade, where I was a spectator to the drumming out of Lieut. Enslin of Col. Malcom's regiment. He was first drum'd from right to left of the parade, thence to the left wing of the army; from that to the centre, and lastly transported over the Schuylkill with orders never to be seen in Camp in the future. This shocking scene was performed by all the drums and fifes in the army — the coat of the delinquent was turned wrong side out.

Ebenezer Wild writes:

After roll call I went on the grand parade, where there was a very large concourse of people assembled. After the guards were paraded, Lieut. Enslin was brought on the parade under a strong guard and his crime was read, which was for attempting to commit sodomy and swearing to false returns. He was sentenced to be drummed out of camp, never to return any more. His coat was turned wrong side outwards, and then he was drummed off the parade and through the camps down to the side of the Skool Kill, where a guard took him and carried him over the bridge and dismissed him.

Not much in known about Enslin’s life before or after this conviction. Some believe he was “Gotthold Friderich Ensslin” born 10 August 1755, baptised in Ober Kochen, Jagstkreis, Wuerttemberg. A “Gotthold Fried. Enslin” arrived in Philadelphia on the ship Union from Rotterdam on 30 September 1774. One possible clue to his life after is two curious listings in the 1798 Boston directory; one for a “Enslin Gotthold F.” who lived on “Newbury street”; and one for a “Enslin Frenderick, physician” on “Blind lane.” (see A Collection of Upwards of Thirty Thousand Names of German, Swiss, Dutch, French and Other Immigrants in Pennsylvania from 1727-1776, Daniel Rupp, p416 for the Union record)

John Manhart in comparison seems not to have faced any punishment. Born 1760 in Germany, Manhart enlisted as a private in Capt. John Sandford’s company of Col. William Malcom’s Regiment on the 26th of April 1777. He was promoted to corporal in May 1779 and continued to serve until the 20th of May 1780 when he was discharged. After the war he married twice, first to Martha Drake Lyons, second to Rebecca Plimett. (Lineage book National Society of the Daughters of the American Revolution Vol. 60, p.141; Pension Application for John Manhart; Founders Online: General Orders, 14 March 1778, Note 3)

Anthony Maxwell was promoted to second lieutenant, this promotion was dated the 28th of February 1778, the day after his court martial. The timing makes me wonder if this promotion was a reward for reporting Enslin. (Fonders Online: General Orders, 3 March 1778, Note 2)

There is some suggestion that this was a case not of consensual sex but of sexual assault. A few pieces of evidence seem to suggest this. First is the rank disparity, Enslin outranked Manhart, this opens up the possibility of coercion. Also concerning is the possible age difference. Manhart would have been only 17 or 18 at the time while no one is sure of Enslin’s age. If he was born August 1755 he would have been 22, however some speculate Enslin could have been in his 30��s (see Conduct Unbecoming, Randy Shilts, p11). But considering no one actually knows how old Enslin was it’s impossible to say whether or not he was significantly older than Manhart. There is also the fact that only Enslin seems to have been punished. Logically one would assume if it was consensual both would have been punished. However even if it was perceived as consensual by the court they may have shown leniency on Manhart due to his youth. Its also possible that Enslin was prosecuted because he was seen as the ‘active’ party. There are just too many unanswered questions to make any definitive conclusions about the nature of this case.

John Anderson

Anderson's court-martial, dated 13th of April 1792, is recorded in the orderly books of General Mordecai Gist:

At the same Court held the 9th Instant, was tried-John Anderson private in the Maryland Line-For Sodomy-The Court are of oppinion, that he is guilty of an attempt, to commit Sodomy, and do sentence him to Run the Gauntlope three times thro' the Brigade-the General approves the Sentence, and orders it to take place this Evening at Roll Call. (Benemann p72)

Running the Gauntlope (gauntlet) was a form of punishment where the convicted is forced to run between two rows of soldiers who strike out and attack them with sticks or weapons. While sodomy was punishable by death it was not uncommon for attempted sodomy to be punished by corporal punishment and public humiliation, this punishment doubles as both.

Attempted Sodomy

In theorising why out of 3,315 prosecutions only 2 are sodomy cases, Benemann suggest that perhaps the military was reluctant to prosecute private and consensual sodomy, stating that both "the Enslin and the Anderson cases appear to be cases of sexual assault." While an argument can be made that the Enslin case was sexual assault, I can’t find any information that suggests the Anderson case was non-consensual.

Benemann provides no reasoning why he thinks both cases were sexual assault. Perhaps its the phrasing; “attempting to commit sodomy” (Enslin case) and "he is guilty of an attempt, to commit Sodomy," (Anderson case). While the use of the word “attempt(ing)” may sound like these men were attempting to sodomise an unwilling man, it's important to know that terms like attempted sodomy or intent to commit sodomy were used to describe sexual acts between men that fell short of the legal requirements for a sodomy conviction. Legal requirements for sodomy convictions varied, however often stress was placed on whether anal penetration had occurred. This means that sex acts such as oral, frottage and mutual masturbation were likely to be ruled as attempted sodomy. Many American states still used English Common Law which traditionally required “Penetration and Emission” to be proved in sodomy cases. (See The Student’s Companion or, the Reason of the Laws of England by Giles Jacob, published 1734) Meaning that if ejaculation had not occurred it may have been ruled attempted sodomy even if anal penetration had occurred. Its also important to note that the punishment for sodomy was usually death, while attempted sodomy was usually punished with fines, imprisonment, corporal punishment and/or public humiliation.

An examination into Old Bailey’s records shows several cases of attempts to commit sodomy that are seemingly consensual. In 1745 Richard Manning was found guilty of “wickedly laying hands on John Davis, with an intent to commit the detestable sin of sodomy” and John Davis was found guilty of “wickedly permitting, and suffering the said Richard Manning to lay hands on him, with an intent to commit the said sin of sodomy”. The two men were caught in a Inn by the innkeeper’s wife kissing with their hands in each others breeches.

In 1730 William Hollywell and William Huggins, were found guilty, “the former for an Assault, with an Intent to commit the detestable Crime of Buggery upon the latter, and he for consenting and submitting to the same.” The two had been caught by John Rowden with Hollywell’s “fore Parts to the other's Posteriors, and his Body in Motion” however Rowden could not clearly see Hollywell’s “fore Parts” thus not proving penetration (though form his full testimony it seems penetration likely occurred).

There is also the two 1728 cases of Julius Cesar Taylor and John Burgess, who seem to have been tried separately but for the same incident. Julius Cesar Taylor, was found guilty of “assaulting John Burgess, with an Intent to commit that horrid and detestable Sin of Sodomy.” John Burgess for “assaulting Julius Cesar Taylor, with an Intent to commit that detestable Sin of Sodomy with the said Julius Cesar Taylor.” The two men were seen together at Taylor’s house on the 15th of August.

Witnesses in the Taylor case testified that they saw him:

sit on the Lap of John Burgess, when they committed such indecent and effeminate Actions, as are not to be mentioned: that the Company who resorted to his House, launch'd into such Extravagance, as was scarce ever heard off.

When any Member enter'd into their Society, he was christned by a female Name, and had a Quartern of Geneva thrown in his Face; one was call'd Orange Deb, another Nel Guin, and a third Flying Horse Moll, and that the Prisoner was Accessary in these unnatural Actions.

Witnesses in the Burgess case testified that they saw him and Julius Cesar Taylor:

commit filthy lewd Actions, which will not bear mentioning to a modest Ear; that they appeard equally pleas'd, Julius Cesar Taylor using undecent Gestures, and Burgess suffering them.

With words like “assault” being thrown around in consensual cases, it makes it hard to discern consensual and non consensual cases when little to no evidence survives.

Attempted sodomy could also refer to cases where one man merely propositioned another. For example in another 1728 case Isaac Milton was found guilty of “assaulting Jonathan Parrey, with an Intent to commit that detestable Sin of Sodomy”. Parrey somewhat curiously testified that they met at the molly house; Muff’s House:

That in June last, he first became acquainted with the Prisoner, at Muff's House in White-Chappel. That at the Three-Nuns in White-Chappel, they lay together, when the Prisoner would have had him committed Sodomy with him, but he refused it; that then the Prisoner offered to act the same Crime of Sodomy with him, but he would not suffer him.

While its nice to think that only rapists were found guilty this simply isn’t the case. In fact in consequence to focus being put on anal penetration and ejaculation, rather than consent, cases that were clearly sexual assault could be ruled attempted sodomy and given a lesser punishment or even dismissed entirely (see Rex v. Samual Jacobs, 1817).

Without more information it's impossible to know exactly what truly happened in the Enslin and the Anderson cases, but neither is a clear cut case of assault and its just as likely that these men were being prosecuted for consensual sex.

The Love That Dare Not Speak Its Name

Another reason Benemann suggests for the lack of Sodomy convictions is a reluctance to name the thing; "One way of avoiding mention of the unspeakable crime was simply to call it something else.” Benemann points to cases where the crime committed is described vaguely. There’s Capt. Isaiah Doane who was charged with appearing in parade in a state of intoxication and “Sleeping with his servants in the kitchen” and Lieut. Alden G. Cushman who was charged with “sleeping with the waiter during most of his Residence at Fort Independence”. At Cantonment Washington there was a court-martial on the charge of lewdness in the barracks-described as “great habits of indecency.” Benemann explains; “Courts could use strong but vague terms such as “filthiness,” “scandalous behavior,” or the all-encompassing “conduct unbecoming an officer and a gentleman.”” He also points to two cases that don’t even mention what crime was committed. (Benemann p73-75)

Conclusion

It’s likely that the lack of convictions is multifaceted. Certainly the culture of Romantic Friendship and platonic bed sharing could make it easier for men of a similar rank and social class to hide any sexual aspect of their relationship, while having relative freedom to express romantic sentiments. It's also likely that many people chose to look the other way in cases of consensual sex. Perhaps an unwillingness to question was motivated by an individuals usefulness to the army or perhaps by personal friendship. The severity of the punishment would also motivate men to take great care to hide their sexual behaviour. The standard for sodomy convictions led to cases falling under attempted sodomy, and a reluctance to talk about such things may have lead to many cases being described vaguely. Certainly while it seems no one was executed for sodomy at Valley Forge, at least one man was publicly drummed out of camp for “attempting to commit sodomy”. Even if we assume the Enslin case was a sexual assault case it was tried and prosecuted as a sodomy case, it sent a message to men who desired sex with other men, this is what happens if you get caught.

#queer history #valley forge #romantic friendship #alexander hamilton #john laurens #baron von steuben #benjamin walker #william north #pierre du ponceau #bulkley and newman #frederick gotthold enslin #john manhart #john anderson #this got long opps

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dcbutinamrev · 3 years

Text

In honor of Hammy’s Death Day Bash, here’s Amrev as Iconic Vines Pt. 3!

(Yes, another one- )

Hamilton and Jefferson: *fighting during a cabinet meeting*

Madison: Can I get a waffle? Can I please get a waffle?

Harrison: I don’t get no sleep cause of y’all! Y’all never gonna sleep cause of me!

Eliza: Girl, guess what they got girl, guess what they got?

Abigal Adams: What?

Eliza: Life-e saviers

Abigal Adams: *wheezes*

Mulligan: Good evening-

Philip H.: It’s an avacado...thanks!

Hamilton: *smokes*

Laurens: *grins* Wow~

Tallmadge: Who’s the hottest uber driver you’ve ever had?

Lafayette: Um...I’ve never went to oovoo Jauver

Meade: Happy Christmas! It’s Christmas! Merry crisis! Merry Chrysler

Hale: Word work ahead? Uh, yeah, I sure hope it does-

Lafayette: I am confusion. Why is this one Kansas? And this one is not R-Kansas. America explain! Explain what you mean by Are-Kan-saw!

Laurens: Is anyone else kind of hot?

Hamilton: Definietly a little toasty in here

Laurens: Might be a good time to open up some windows

Hamilton:

Hamilton: Ah!

Lafayette: Ah! Stop! I could’ve dropped my crossiant!

Angelica S.: *when she reads the Reynold’s Pamphlet* You freaking freaks! You’re fantasies can’t ever be quenched! Can they?! You freaking freaks! When will you learn?! When will you learn?! That your actions have consequences!

Charles Lee: I’m about sing a song!

Laurens: Move bitch! Get out the way!

General Clinton: I’m just chillin’ in Cedar Rapids-

Hamilton: *at Laurens* Country-boy, I love you, blech

Washington: *when Hamilton asks to leave to go with Laurens in South Carolina* No off topic questions. Because I don’t want too. No. Permission denied. That’s an off topic question. Next. You have been stopped-

The Continenatals: *at the Redcoats* Look at all those chickens!

Spada: *barks*

Lafayette: The power of Christ compells you! The power of Christ compells you!

Tilghman: *sleeping*

Meade: *pours water*

Tilghman: Hello?

Andre: *plays flute hard-core like in carriage*

Washington: *walks in room*

Hamilton: Brah!

Washington: *jumps and relaxes* I’m gonna kill you. I’m gonna kill you. Not even worried about it..

The aides: *laughs*

Jefferson: We actually have the chip reader now.

Hamilton: Oh, yeah?

Jefferson: Oh, it’s not gonna work with that kind of...

*transaction completed*

Jefferson:

Franklin: *blows smoke* Atom-

Hamilton: How do you know what’s good for me?!

Washington: That’s my OPINION!

The other aides:

Eliza: Philip, let me see what you got?

Philip H.: A knife!

Eliza: No!

Arnold: You know what? I love myself. Even though I look like a BURNT chicken nugget, I still love myself

Lafayette: *learning English* Wha...wha...

Hamilton: What does that say, Marquis

Lafayette: Wha...?

Hamilton: No!

Laurens: *at the pantsless flaming shots party* Two shots of vodka-

Peggy S.: Eliza wake up!

Eliza: One more minute!

Peggy: You’ve been in a coma for two years...

Eliza: Okay, two more minutes-

Tallmadge: *playing piano*

Hale: SAIL!

Laurens: *talking about Kinloch* Yeah so he broke up with me

Hamilton: Why are you looking up?

Laurens: I need to cry but my lotion was $48!

John Adams: I wanna be a cowboy, baby! I wanna be a cowboy, baby!

Philomena Cheer: Hey, I want to be famous

Laurens: *note says I do* Read this

Hamilton: I do

Laurens: He said yes!

Burr: You gotta tell me everything, right now

Hamilton: No

Burr: Please

Hamilton: No

Burr: Please

Hamilton: No

Laurens: And just remember! No one will be able to hate you than you already hate yourself

Peggy Shippen: People say I can’t do what I love without college...I don’t need a degree to be a clothing hanger!

Laurens: Nope, there’s no Q. You loose

Hamilton: Dude, are you kidding me? You can still add something

Laurens: I added a belt, four earrings, and an extra arm! You loose!

John Hancock: Would anyone like some stew-

Hamilton: Babe, do you love me?

Laurens: *after he discovers Hamilton’s marriage* Not in the slightest

Hamilton: Uugh, for real? Oh my God

King George III: All over the world, people are dying of starvation. Africa, Asia, the fucking M24!

Burr: Not on my watch! Not on my watch!

Lafayette: *to Laurens about the Schuykill incident*: We tried, but we lost him

Laurens: Okay, well find him please

Caleb Brewster: I got this long hair, this big sexy beard, I love my socks cause it’s unique-

Hamilton: I don’t feel like driving!

Laurens: *panics and grabs wheel*

Jefferson: I don’t sing in the shower... I perform...

King George III: We go to parks everywhere. McDonald’s, supermarkts, stadiums, the fucking M24!

Hamilton: *at Laurens* Hey, I think you’re really cool. I like you a lot. Maybe we could hang out or something

Revere: What are you doing?

Franklin: I’m making holy water...

Revere: How is that making holy water?

Franklin: I’m boiling the hell out of it

Revere:

Henry Laurens: That’s it! Time out! Get on the lamp!

Laurens: *awkwardly on lamp* I’m in hell!

Andre: Get me a Bloody Mary and make it snappy

Arnold: Sir, this is Subway-

Andre: Just make it happen-

Monroe: Dear diary, today I couldn’t find my diary so I’m writing this on both of my Kung-Fu Panda 2 DVDs-

Andre: All these ghosts, all these ghosts, and I still can’t find a boo...

Adams: Where’s my new balances hun?

Abigal Adams: I put them in the closet

Adams: Well, they’re not in here! Let’s rock and roll

Abigal Adams: We have to go-

Adams: I have to record this

Burr: I should have left you on the street corner where you were standing

Hamilton: But ya didn’t!

Meade: Hey, Harrison,

Harrison: What man?

Meade: Dogs be like...meow!

Harrison: You stupid idiot! Dogs be like bark!

James Hamilton: Okay, you’re in time out! Get on top of the fridge! Get up there!

Hamilton: This house is a fucking nightmare!

#vines #iconic vines #amrev as vines #hammy's death day bash #men don't wear foundation so i had to use lotion that was the closet thing I could thing of #this took me foreever to make #i would make this into a video but i don't know how #amrev

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