This morning, as I was trying to fight off a panic attack, I hopped into a cold shower to basically clean the panic away. As I was doing that, I somehow managed to get soap in my eyes.
Inbetween the stinging pain the scent of cedar wood, and tears, I started giggling like an idiot.
Couldn't even be mad at the situation for the poor timing that it was, because hey, it definitely distracted me from my anxiety
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So sorry for spam reblogging just now this is how I declare friendship when I'm nervous 😭😭
No no you’re okay! You’re valid for that honestly LMAO but dw I’m not really a person that gets annoyed by the whole spamming shtick
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to be seen.
Tell me, how does it feel?
When I tell you that it's okay to not feel like going out for the day.
Or when I tell you small details about yourself that perhaps even you didn't quite realise before.
When I noticed that you were hungry from the way your eyes stared at the croissant that I had just bought.
Or when I offered you a ride home because you were too lazy to walk.
Tell me, does it feel nice?
To have someone who cared and understood you when no one else would.
To have someone who gladly observes you when no one else would.
To have someone who offers to do things for you when no one else would.
To have someone who always volunteered for you to lean on when no one else would.
Tell me, how could you not realise?
Sometimes I want you to comfort me, but you don't seem to care or understand.
Sometimes I want you to notice me, but you never took the time to observe.
Sometimes I want to try the pastries you ordered, but you never offered them.
Sometimes I want you to walk me home, but you didn't want to be someone I could lean on.
Tell me, should I leave?
Should I leave you crying, because you didn't feel like yourself for the day?
Should I leave you feeling lonely, because no one is there to look at you?
Should I leave you hungry, because I don't want to share my food with someone else?
Should I leave you feeling scared, because no one is there to safely escort you home?
Tell me, how does it feel?
To not be seen?
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thinking about mike being forced to grow up fast as a kid to take on roles and responsibilities he shouldn't have to handle at his age, meaning there are times when he doesn't get to live life as a kid, and then thinking about will telling mike he wants to spend the rest of his life with him in his basement playing games
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My day is pretty ordinary.
Wake up, go to the bathroom, brush my teeth, I don't wanna die, look in the mirror and smile.
Eat breakfast — not so hungry, though, maybe skip — smile.
Your friends message you, so, maybe go for a walk. Smile.
Joke only about something your friends consider funny; your friends don't think suicide is funny. Smile.
Come back, eat lunch — skip. Smile.
Read something depressing, ignore the rare thoughts of the girl who abruptly stopped talking to you in 6th grade, skip dinner, find out you're out of bottles of gin — maybe that's for the better — smile.
Brush your teeth, cry in the shower, lie in bed till 4 in the morning.
Finally, cry yourself to sleep.
Repeat. Reverse.
who is it in the mirror?
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I want to write messed up things, but also don’t have spoons.
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Why are they in a car. Why are they driving. They look so proud of themself.
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