Hi Linsky, love love all of your work and ‘more than i could ever promise’ is one of my favorite fics ever! I was looking through old tags and saw you mentioned a 1988 Persuasion AU, is that still something that’s in the works?

Funny you should mention that! I was actually just thinking about how I would love to write a story for Jack Eichel and Noah Hanifin now that Noah's been traded to the Knights, and the more I thought about it the more it was obvious that Persuasion is the perfect narrative for them. They fall in love in the USNTDP and stay together when they're both in Boston, but then someone (a parent?) convinces Noah that if they try to stay together long-distance when they're both in the NHL they'll be miserable and get outed and ruin both of their careers. Noah's not sure he'd be able to bring himself to break up with Jack if it was just his own career at stake, but if if staying together means also ruining Jack's...

So he breaks up with Jack, and Jack is furious and betrayed, and they don't speak for years. Noah resigns himself to being loveless in a career that feels lonelier by the year, and he thinks that if he could go back in time he would tell his eighteen-year-old self to forget about caution and practicality and just stay with the person who meant the most to him in the world. But it's obviously too late for that now. They play in different countries, and Jack won't even talk to him.

But then Jack has to talk to him, because Noah gets traded.

so for the first time I saw batman: the killing joke.

...

it was okay I guess. but massively overrated. I expected some fucking masterpiece of cinema but instead it was just two unrelated short films that were more style and flash than substance.

so first off, barbara's storyline was mediocre. franz wasn't a compelling villain; just a creep, and a trust fund brat. oh wow he's a mafia kid who stole his family's fortune by hacking. if it was the falcone family I'd have cared more but it wasn't so it's just some faceless deathfodder rando. who gives a shit. the whole situation was just a vehicle to shove batman's dick into babs. which kinda fucks over bruce's character here and judging by the timeline kinda makes him a bit of a groomer, yikes. bruce and gordon have known each other since bruce was a young boy and we know that bruce is way older than babs so yeah bruce totally knew her from birth until present day, he literally utilized an active power dynamic to police her crimefighting activities, and he should have fucking known better and stopped her when she kissed him because it would (and did) compromise their professional dynamic, but hey, batdick. and at least barbara recognized that she was behaving emotionally rather than logically when it came to bruce and paris and took the high road out. that would be a serviceable standalone episode to write her on a bus in a serialization but THIS IS A MOVIE. so for a waste of an already short runtime it's like having an appetizer before your meal but instead of something like a crab cake before stuffed flounder, you get greasy onion petals that are more fried batter than onion before getting a well done cheeseburger that's just a glorified hockey puck on a sponge with a kraft single on top. the animation and vocal delivery were excellent of course, not gonna disparage that aspect, so it was well made, but the writing was just not very good. a polished turd. quantic dream must have developed it then because it feels like I watched a david cage production.

so in a 78 minute movie, five of which were the credits, we had a half hour Disney/Pixar short except those bring joy and this brought boring. also there were a lot of shots of her ass tits and underwear that were obnoxiously male-gazey and there was a token gay for the sole purpose of dangling a carrot on a stick for the queers. look kids, warner brothers and dc comics cares about the lgbts! give us money! a waste of time before the real reason why anyone came to see the movie that literally only exists to pad out the runtime to make it a feature length (even though paying a full ticket would've been a total ripoff because, again, IT WAS ONLY 78. even 9 was 81 minutes long and that had an amazing storyline so I forgave it, but 78 minutes? ugh.

also, GOTHAM RAGE??? CRINGE. SO CRINGE.

alright now for the joker segment.

*ahem*

what the fuck? that sucked! *throws tomato*

mark hamill and the joker's lines and the art and the cinematography and the choreography was all good and the plot was cohesive. I get it.

but holy shit was the writing weak as fuck.

okay so some rando breaks the J-ster out of Arkham (already unlikely but ugh whatever), he didn't turn a trick or recruit or anything, he just went to purchase a carnival. or, steal one. but wait, he DID recruit, but he went to get all of the stereotypical Circus Freak™ stereotypes. little people, fat lady, bearded lady, wolf man, strongman, diaper man (wait, what?), and the two headed woman. I guess if you don't really think about why all of them were super readily available in the outskirts between arkham and gotham [i just realized they both end with -am] then it makes enough sense. and then literally right after that HE RECRUITS SOME GUYS TO HELP HIM KIDNAP GORDON. and then strips and photographs barbara. um. ew. you can tell the writer and director were men. Alan Moore is constantly molesting women in his comics and this one trick pony should be put down already. but whatever. the plot is weak and it only gets saved by the flashback sequences.

oh.

oh no.

they're not that great.

he's a failed unfunny comedian who just wants some money to move his wife to a better house so he turns to thievery with the mob. OR YOU COULD JUST STOP GOING TO THE BAR AND BLOWING IT ALL ON BOOZE. I mean the cops knew where to find him after all so clearly he's a repeat customer (or moore is a bad plot writer who relies on convenience and shut the fuck up and don't critically analyze it). alright so he gets wrapped up in the mob to perform a heist on a playing card factory. GET IT, BECAUSE HE'S THE JOKER??? and he uses the moniker of the red hood to retain his anonymity. I expected the mobsters to be working for francisco but no the paris storyline was only cooked up screenplay for passing the runtime so why would they do something clever and interesting and make the film cohesive? that'd be really stupid to make the movie feel more like one movie and not two short films. at least when grindhouse & planet terror did it they advertised themselves as an anthology film. whatever. he falls in the vat of acid which melts the red hood to his face and I gotta say that's actually a pretty good idea to get his face white and his hair green and his lips red. I like that part. oh wait I forgot about the most important part! his wife gets shoved in the refrigerator. OH WOW THAT'S JUST SO COMPELLING AND ORIGINAL, TOTALLY NOT SOMETHING THAT ALREADY HAPPENED TO GREEN LANTERN. TWICE. although she wasn't literally shoved into a literal refrigerator like alex was. rip in frozen pieces you absolute legend of a trope namer. alright, so... so the joker is sad because his wife died. you know, the wife we saw for two minutes and knew the moment we saw her drenched in sepia she was gonna die. and she died offscreen. kyle's gf died and he was fine. gordon's wife died and he was fine. batman's parents both died and he was fine. oh boo hoo someone I love died! fuck off. I am so goddamn sick of people trying to justify their evil with "I was sad once". it's a stupid trope and it's not compelling. the only valid version is doctor doofenshmirtz' evil(er) version in the PF movie because it's hilarious that it's because of a toy train because that's the emotional depth that fridgewomen is treated with in all of these storylines. but at least batman said so. oh yeah, I almost totally forgot, batman's in this movie.

batman punches people and nonlethally takes them out. by suffocating them and letting them get stabbed and throwing them into pits of spikes and HEY WAIT A GODDAMN SECOND! okay let's just ignore that bit and hope that the little people squeezed between the gaps in the spikes and the strongman could breathe in the face mask and the two headed women had KO gas and the fat lady was fat enough that the knives only stabbed her cellulite. it wouldn't be the biggest reach one would have to make in watching this fucking disaster of a plot mess.

now I did like that it was actually batman, and by that I mean he gave a shit about the insane because he recognizes that mental illness is not a cause of dangerous or criminal behavior, just a potential exacerbating factor if it wasn't treated. yeah he brutalized mobsters and crime lords but they were mostly in self defense while gathering intel. he politely asked sal maroni and the sex workers for information and they gave it to him without violence- he manhandled maroni but only after he reached into his pocket for a cigar which could've been a gun. also batman says sex work should be decriminalized if only by not ratting them out to the cops. he was a genuinely good person in the second half of the movie. too bad it was ruined by the shitty first half that made him a borderline groomer.

joker's song was... bad. mark hamill performed his ass off but the song wasn't that good. it just tried to be willy wonka if he was a voyeuristic monster. oh yeah have the only girl character be paralyzed stripped and photographed only to give her father ManPain™. again... the fuck? joker and batman were both gross but, again. male writers. if it was a one-off I could drop a thermian argument because, alright one and done makes sense, especially 1988 standards. but it saturated and soured the entire goddamn movie because of abhorrent pacing decisions. so you're goddamn right I'm gonna bring it up twice! joker was a creep, his plan was dumb, nolan and burton and lord/miller and even ayer had better motivations. YES I AM SAYING THAT JARED LETO'S JOKER HAD BETTER WRITING THAN MARK HAMILL'S JOKER. not nearly to the level of ledger nicholson or galifanakis but hamill didn't have a lot to work with here and I maintain that his performance was amazing; honestly I like his the best out of all of them but just... not here. but I think I can cut some slack to firelord ozai and luke skywalker even if he just phoned it in here which he didn't. writing was just weak. and that's all there is to it. don't anon me and threaten to remove my bones ok?

alright so batman and joker fought and joker got the upper hand and was gonna kill him but it was a prop gun. haha. they had a heart to heart and batman tells joker that he wants to help him get better, even after joker killed robin and molested barbara and traumatized gordon and did countless other travesties, he still said he would help. but joker said no, and told a joke that was good enough to make batman laugh. and then the credits rolled.

...

what a completely pointless and empty ending. oh it's deep and meaningful and poignant? ok sure, I guess, movie, but you didn't earn that. shyamalan did the same thing a dozen times. that doesn't make him any less of a shit writer.

I can understand the concept of batman laughing at joker's joke, humanizing him.

I get it. I see what they tried to do. I respect it.

but this movie was massively overhyped and overrated and I expected it to be so much better than it was. but overall to me it was just another batman cartoon to throw on top of the pile. maybe it was influential to graphic novels. maybe it shaped batman into what he is today. it published right as tim burton's movie and I can respect its place in the pantheon of comic history. but sometimes things that are classic...

aren't that great.

citizen kane, casablanca, the maltese falcon, the treasure of the sierra madre, gone with the wind, singing in the rain, all of them are classic and legendary pieces of art. but they're just not that good, interesting, appealing, watchable, or FUN. they were good at the time- I mean come on we all know them today- but on going back you'd have to really appreciate the finer details to still love the movies today. and this belongs there, in the vault, to be appreciated from afar. influential if dated.

but god am I still disappointed nonetheless.

TL;DR

it was just okay. had some good ideas, had some really bad ideas, had some ugly stuff. overall mediocre. first half 5/10, second half 7/10, overall 6/10.

|| i saw this post and just had the idea of will freaking out at mike for being tall-- but of course that’s not really what it’s about. just something short and sweet (literally) for you || ao3

It’s in the grocery store that Will just snaps at him. Will’s going shopping for his mom after school. It’s no big thing; Will enjoys the time alone. Except of course, it’s the last day before spring break and Mike’s skipped the last day of school and driven up to see him. Mike’s an extra set of hands to help brings bags into the house, and he’s not too bad of a driver to man the cart.

When Mike pulls up to the house-- just as Will’s grabbing his bag and getting to Jonathan’s car-- he looks so different. His hair is just a little shorter-- cropped and kept, just how Ted likes it, but with Karen’s kind influence of letting him be, Ted, come on. The main thing, at least to Will, is that he’s taller. The man is taller. Will feels his neck crack as he tilts back, just a little. He didn’t shrink, but when Mike runs up to him, he swears he did.

When Will is silent and stares at him for a while, Mike replies that he’s six-foot-two. Which is fine. It’s fine. It’s just that Will is five-foot-six still. But whatever. It’s fine.

Will kind of forgets about it-- forgets about how his new friends call him small. not short but small; how his new doctor is worried he’s stunted from all his “medical trauma” and is trying to talk his mother into having him take steroids; how he secretly likes being the same height because he knows his mom can’t afford buying both him and El new clothes; how he hates that the first thing people notice between him and Mike isn’t even that they’re two men since Will’s short enough to match people’s perception of what “normal” couples look like. Will just forgets about it. And for a while it’s nice.

Mike doesn’t know jack shit about vegetables and Will teaches him how to pick fruit that is just the right amount of unripe so it will last longer in the fridge. Mike pushes the cart and nods, at least pretending he’s enjoying the lesson. It’s 1988 and Mike places his hand on Will’s back when he stands and stares at the wall of soup cans, trying to read prices and brands quickly. It’s 1988 and Will doesn’t even watch how he says “Michael”. It’s a nice outing until they get to the cereal aisle.

It is nearly cleaned out, all the extra boxes up on the top shelf in disorganized storage stacks. Will groans and steps up onto the bottom shelf, his hand straining as he feels around for a box of something. His ribs are pressed to the middle shelf and he tries to keep from swearing. There’s an older lady with two young kids that’s been watching them since they arrived in the aisle-- Mike’s hand gently finding Will’s-- and Will doesn’t want to give her any ammunition to start shouting.

“Would you like some help, Will?” Mike laughs and grabs him under the arms. He hoists Will nearly like he’s weightless, helping him step down to the floor again.

Will sighs. “Yes.”

“What do you want?” Before Will can answer, Mike is sliding box after box down and placing them on the shelves in front of Will’s eye line. “I’ve got ‘em all.”

“I just needed the Cheerios, thanks.” Will grumbles, taking the box and tossing it into the cart. He pushes the cart and they leave the woman’s stare. He feels tense all over again. He forgets to keep forgetting about it-- about everything-- for a moment.

“How do you do this without me.” Mike is simply trying to tease him-- be verbally affectionate when his hands can only jostle his shoulders. “I need to think about moving up here you don’t have to struggle every time you just want to buy something--”

“Shut up, Mike.”

“W--What? What did I say? Was it that you’re short? Because... Will, we know this. It’s my favorite thing about you, you know that.”

“I don’t really want to hear it right now.” Will isn’t aware he’s clenching his teeth until he hears himself speak. “Being small is kind of not my favorite.”

“Oh, but-- It’s fun! You fit right under my arm and you don’t really need to steal as much of the blankets when we sleep--”

“Mike.” Will tries to drop out from under Mike’s arm: he placed it around his shoulders to demonstrate his point. Will is suddenly very aware that they’re two men, even if from every other angle no one seems to notice because he’s... a full eight inches shorter than Mike. It doesn’t feel great to be able to excuse homophobia because he’s as short as a girl. “Mike, please shut up.”

“What?” He’s sincere, but he’s still very confused. He still thinks it’s about being short. He doesn’t move his arm. “OH, well, actually I do hate the whole you-get-to-steal-my-clothes-thing. But if those are the reparations--”

“Would you just shut up, Tall Boy!” Will snaps, twisting around to face Mike. They’re in the middle of the baby section, where no one would be likely to stumble into them.

“T-Tall Boy?” Mike laughs, but he’s still trying to figure out that Will’s genuinely upset. “I-- What? What happened? Did I say something?”

“Yes! Stop talking about how short I am. I hate it.” Will doesn’t know why but he chokes up a little. He pretends he needs to be looking at plastic sippy cups. They look so out of place when the older lady and her children come strolling past. “I hate remembering I’m short.”

“Remembering.” Mike repeats. “Do you... forget?”

“El grew four inches in like... two months.”

“Okay...”

“Mom had to buy her new skirts and jeans because they got too short, too fast. It was the middle of winter and her ankles were so chapped-- She worked another two shift to pay for it.” Will’s breathing is choppy and it’s so stupid. Mike is silent, but because he’s listening, which is still weird for Will to think about.

“Okay. So short is good. You’ve got all your clothes and you’ve got all mine if you need it. And I’m sure Steve’s got more stuff that’s up your alley. It’s okay. Will, it’s okay. I won’t let you go cold.” Mike places his hands on Will’s shoulders, his thumbs brush against his neck.

“They say I’m small at school.” Will pushes through. “Small. You know what else is small? Babies are small. Mistakes are small. OH and you know what is usually small? Girls. Girls are small-- except my sister. Who’s giant--”

“She’s only like... five-nine.”

“Mike.”

“Sorry, literal perspective I see is not the point here.” He nods. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s just-- People don’t think you’re gay sometimes.” Will realizes this doesn’t make sense to anyone but him.

“Uh. That’s... I’m not sure that’s our fault.”

“Well, see, it’s my fault. From a distance, I look like your girlfriend. Not a very, short short man.”

“Well, that’s not your fault. People are blind and weird and straight. That’s not-- You’re not a girl, Will. You definitely aren’t a girl nor look like one or act like one or-- You just aren’t. Being short is not a fault!”

Will sighs and leans into Mike’s hand. “You’re supposed to say that. You’re my boyfriend.”

“I could complain-- would you like me to?” Mike says with a smile. His eyebrows are still furrowed though: he’s upset. “I hate that you can fit comfortably on any bed we share. I hate that... You sometimes can buy kids’ shirts? Because they’re always cooler. Like, you have one you bought as a painting smock that has a freakin shark on it and I gotta say... Men’s clothes, not as cool! I’m less cool as my art school boyfriend because I got tall too quick. Dude, that sucks. I want to be cool like you!”

Will is definitely crying, but he doesn’t acknowledge it. He laughs and smiles. He hopes it makes up for his sniffling. “You think I’m cool?”

“Yeah! My cool, short boyfriend. He’s awesome and he’s super nice because he... worries about the socio-political meaning of him being short. Like. He’s so smart. So smart.”

“He’s the only one who knows what the hell a mango is in your relationship.” Will says, wiping his eyes.

“Yeah! Concentrated intelligence!” Mike reaches for Will’s underarms again. He catches Will’s smile before jokingly hoisting him an inch off the ground. “He’s better because of-- everything, but right now let’s say it’s because he’s not a six-foot-two monster who hits his head on every door frame in his house.”

“Oh my god-- is that what that bump is from?” Will hiccups, laughter nearly scaring him. “Oh, Michael, you poor.... tall thing.”

They laugh in the baby aisle until Will’s face is less red and puffy. As they walk, Mike makes jokes about the weird names of food brands. He offers to get Will things on all shelves, just being a helpful partner rather than a shopping giraffe. He repeats Will’s name every time he speaks to him and someone is in earshot. Will smiles and each time calls him a sappier and sweeter version of “Michael”. Will finishes shopping and feels rather accomplished as they pack the car up.

He forgets about everything again for a while. Everything but Mike. Well, Mike, but more importantly how he makes him feel: so happy, so listened to, so short. And it’s all okay. It’s nothing. Just one small thing in a short life full of so many wonderful, loving things.

7 Comfort Movies

Tagged by @jj-carstairs​ :D

Fantasia (1940) I will never, ever, ever stop recommending this masterpiece, it’s the single greatest thing Disney ever made, especially with how the narrative always comes back to how they let their artists’ imaginations run wild - for the first, and last time, the corporation really cooperated with their artists (also the 2000 version sucks in comparison, but I digress)

Lord of the Rings (2001-2003, Extended) Brings me to tears. every. time. The magic, the tragedy, the social commentary... usually rewatched at least once every six months. <w<

Godzilla (2014) The only movie of the 2010s I keep coming back to. The build-up is exquisite omigawd. And the enemy being animals who were literally just doing their thing. Just... megafauna on steroids 11/10 (I can even handle obnoxious American military in this LOLOL)

Land Before Time (1988) My childhood... my heart... 

Spirited Away (2001) It remains the best Ghibli film (Princess Mononoke is a good number two ngl) and there’s so much eye candy to rest one’s eyes upon. The softness of the scenes, the DETAILS, the storyline - it was also the first film I watched as a kid where I consciously knew it was Japanese, and it got me into their folklore more. 

Pride & Prejudice (1995) Colin. Friggen. Firth. Need I say more? Okay yes, Jennifer Ehle’s SMILES. So true to the book. So much finesse. The snark. The longing. There is no other adaptation. This is the one truth. 

Apocalypse: The Second World War (2009) Might look weird on a comfort movie list but I love this series. so. much. It is intensely truthful, to the point of pain, there’s no glossing over anything, no glorification of any part of the war. It is told as-is, but the narrative is one of compassion, and hope, for a better tomorrow. Which is why to me, this is comfort watching. But yes trigger warnings, for heaven’s sake there are triggers here, don’t look into this if you cannot handle cruel death. 

That Time Forgot: IAD Alien (and related concepts)

I gotta admit. For the longest time, I thought that this car, with its supremely space-age design, was not real. But after a bit of a search and some other things... I found it was. I believe some people might share this sentiment. Today, I’m going to talk about the history behind the IAD Alien, along with, as a bonus, all of the other things IAD made over the years.

IAD, or International Automotive Design, was a British design company founded in 1976 by husband and wife Yvonne and John Shute. The company originally designed bodies for trains (my other interest), but eventually branched out to designing bodies for automobiles. Increasing demand eventually caused IAD to branch out to encompassing various different facets of the industry, from design and sculpting models to small-scale production. In the 1980s, IAD was one of the biggest automotive design firms in the world, competing against such giants like Bertone, Italdesign and of course, Pininfarina, and also had multiple facilities around the world.

Touted as “Britain’s Largest Styling Company”, IAD meant business. To prove that they were a force in the industry, they designed a number of concept cars throughout the 1980s to early 1990s, and we’ll be talking about them here. I will not be counting cars that were designed by IAD, but manufactured by another company.

The first of the concept cars they designed was known as the TRX.

The TRX was a radical restyling of the Triumph TR7, designed by Martin Longmore. The TRX attempted to make the car have a completely different appearance, but keeping the fundamental structure of the car as close as possible to the TR7. General Electric Plastics helped to fund the project. It was displayed at the 1980 Birmingham Motor Show.

Their next project was the Arrival, displayed at the 1985 Frankfurt Motor Show. The car attempted to demonstrate IAD’s expertise with computer-aided design, showing a proposal for a five-door sedan designed entirely with a computer.

The next car IAD would design would turn out to be arguably their most famous design yet, helped by the fact that a Hot Wheels model was produced replicating the car: the Alien.

The IAD Alien was designed by Longmore and Marcus Hotblack, and was their proposal for a futuristic mid-engined supercar. Featuring a canopy door which tilted forward for unhindered entrance and egress, the Alien showcased a number of interesting solutions for the general public. The car was first introduced at the 1986 Turin Motor Show.

The car itself featured a highly sophisticated interior with a starship-like steering wheel and heads-up display for the dashboard. The interior was also well-protected, with an integrated roll cage in the car. Quite possibly the most interesting part of the car was its modularity; owners of the car could switch out engines on the fly for easy upgrading, maintenance or to change to something else the driver suited. A bit over the top, yes, but that’s what the ‘80s were like.

Unfortunately, the car was non-functional, and Longmore and Hotblack would move on to their next project.

The Impact was their next project, also designed by Longmore and Hotblack. Built on a Ford Sierra chassis and powered by a 2.8L Cologne V6, the Impact aimed to be one of the most barrier-free SUVs possible, with folding steps when any of the doors opened. A split tailgate and underfloor storage allowed the Impact to store more than a usual SUV could. It was branded as a Sports/Utility Car by a brochure, and featured an in-car navigation system. The car was showcased at the 1987 Frankfurt Motor Show.

To add to their SUV portfolio, IAD did up the Interstate. Designed by Tony Pettman, the usual Ford Cologne V6 was fitted underneath a soundproof cover, allowing for some of the quietest rides. It too, like the Impact, was introduced at the 1987 Frankfurt Motor Show.

Following up the Impact was the Hunter, a rugged off-road vehicle equipped with navigational systems and a telephone. Appearing very similarly to the Impact, the Hunter was also fitted with the same Ford Cologne V6 and featured weatherproof seats made out of foam. It was showcased at the 1988 Turin Motor Show, and was designed by Longmore, Hotblack and Dave Ancona.

After the Hunter came the Royale, designed by Bill Barranco and Jose Diaz de la Vega. The Royale was built around a highly modified Subaru XT-6, with the wheelbase stretched. Meant for business executives, the Royale had a rotary keypad and controls for the CD player and satnav systems available to both rear passengers. The headlights and taillights were engineered by Phillips (yes, that Phillips), and featured a massive LED screen in the rear of the car integrated with the taillamps engineered to give various pieces of road safety information. It, like the Hunter, was also shown off at the 1988 Turin Auto Show.

Their next car was the rather interesting-looking (and potentially rather unsightly) Venus. Introduced at the 1989 Tokyo Motor Show, the Venus was designed by Michael Ani and touted as a futuristic supercar with both performance and a distinctive appearance. The design aimed to form a blend between the technical and aesthetic aspects of the car. A functioning model of the car was eventually built on a Lotus Elise chassis.

Their next project was simply titled the Mini MPV. Powered by a Ford Escort’s CVH 1.9L engine, the Mini MPV could seat six people in three rows. It debuted at the 1990 Turin Motor Show and may have been trialed at Los Angeles International Airport at the time.

Okay, I’m breaking the “outsourced production” rule, but technically this thing was designed by IAD but never produced, so it sort of qualifies. This is the IAD Magia (or Lancia Magia), designed by Ani and Brian Osborn. Featuring the 2.0L FIAT Twin-Cam inline-4 from a Lancia Delta Integrale, the Magia featured a “svelte body” on top of a Lancia Dedra platform, and was touted as “a car to capture the imagination of all the devotees of sporting coupes”. The car was shown off at the 1992 Turin Auto Show, where it was extremely well received, although serial production never materialized.

Reeling from the effects of the European Union’s automobile industry’s worst recession, IAD went into receivership and was acquired by Mayflower Group in 1993. John Shute would die two years later on 13 January 1995, aged 54. Despite his death, IAD would go on to design one more concept on their own.

That design was the EuroTaxi. This was a taxi designed to be the cheapest and most efficient taxi to operate by miles. The EuroTaxi attempted to extend service intervals through the use of both an internal combustion engine and an onboard battery pack, and as a result, decrease downtime. The car was showcased at the 1995 Frankfurt Motor Show, but of course, no orders were placed. The EuroTaxi would turn out to be IAD’s last design.

With the money running dry due to said recession, Britain’s Leading Styling Company were forced to release their chokehold on the car design industry and vanished. The company’s design facilities were bought over by Daewoo Motors, and IAD faded into obscurity, never to be heard from again, while Pinifarina, Bertone and Italdesign are still around today, designing cars.

Okay, now that we’ve gotten the history of IAD out of the way, let’s talk about what you came for: the Hot Wheels version of the IAD Alien.

The Alien was designed by Larry Wood and first introduced in the 1989 Speed Fleet series in the above color, somewhat replicating that of the real Alien; however, this color is quite rare and was quickly replaced by the far more common red version. The casting never received any mention of IAD on it; for all its releases it was simply titled “Alien”.

The Alien features a plastic wraparound body rivited to the base, with metal fender flares and a plastic canopy. This canopy can theoretically be removed, but I’m not going to attempt to do so; instead, I’ll show a picture of one with the canopy removed.

The casting has a metal base, which makes this casting quite heavy. It actually has some decent details on the undercarriage.

The base features few markings apart from the logo and copyright information. I can honestly see people not being able to identify this car, but this was at a time where little other information other than copyright and the Hot Wheels logo was placed on the base; this lasted from about the mid-’80s to the mid-to-late-’90s, at which point it was presumably mandated to put the name of the casting on the base unless it couldn’t fit.

The Alien enjoyed the privilege of being released quite often when it was in the lineup, but ultimately this casting was doomed in 1999 for one reason, and one reason only: the Final Run Series.

The Final Run Series started in 1999 and acted as what I would consider a very glorified funeral for a casting; Hot Wheels would give these cars special tires and paint, in exchange for vowing to never produce them again by cutting their toolings in half. The Alien was unfortunately one of the castings to fall victim to the Final Run Series, and although it might not have been one of the more popular castings to retire that year, it was still retired regardless. As the first batch of cars to be Final Run, having been introduced in the 1999 series, the Alien will never be seen again in the Hot Wheels lineup unless a new tool and die is created for it, which I believe is highly unlikely. The Final Run Series itself has been on hiatus since 2006. In total, the Alien had fifteen releases.

Always on the receiving end of very loud decals due to its plastic sides and large fenders, the Alien will be dearly missed (by me, at least) in the Hot Wheels lineup, and I wouldn’t mind seeing a modern recreation of the Alien return to the Hot Wheels lineup as a premium piece.

I hope this post has given you a better idea on the history of this futuristic British supercar concept, and the history of its small Hot Wheels counterpart. As usual, I’d write something like this any day.

- Grunty

Dirty Dancing

I had a hankering to watch one of my old favorites today - one I’ve seen hundreds of times and that’s not an exaggeration. I probably watched it one hundred times alone the first summer it was on HBO and I recorded it - I’m guessing 1988 since it came out in 87?

Anyway - the short version of this post is simply that I’m pretty sure Dirty Dancing is a big part of my bisexuality and polyamorousness like. I’m sorry but Baby falls for Penny as much as Johnny and you can’t convince me otherwise and they would make an excellent throuple. And my little hetnormative-trained 13 year old brain didn’t KNOW that was a big draw of the movie for me but it was because the scenes between the three of them were my favorites - especially the dance training montage scenes where they’re all dancing together oh my HEART. But also just like you see so clearly how Baby is crushing on them both so much in those beginning stages and SOMETHING ABOUT THAT SPOKE TO MY LIL TEENAGE HEART OKAY?

So but the longer version is that I still love every single bit of this damned movie (2 minor exceptions - when Baby says “I’m not proud of myself” in her emotional monologue to her dad? I’d take that out. And also I wish the mom had just a smidge more agency but I also get that the lack of agency for the women was a big part of the story- hence these only being slight exceptions).

But okay yes. The movie? Is hella fun with a kicking soundtrack and amazing dancing and acting and Grey and Swayze have chemistry coming out of their whazoodles and I’d throw Rhodes in there too and all of that is fun and sexy and romantic and nostalgic (now for TWO decades since it kinda melds 60′s and 80′s stuff together in some ways).

You know what else though? It’s also just an amazing movie with incredible peeks into the sexism and classism of the era, and especially the intersection of the two. It explores both upper and lower class women’s roles and how both lower class men and women were treated. Swayze’s Johnny Castle is treated like a sexual object and expected to have sex with the upper class women who are being neglected by their husbands (interesting to note that the entertainment staff was forbidden to socialize with the daughters but expected to sex up the older ladies and the more educated upper class staff were expected to romance but not have sex with the daughters of the guests). 

Then there’s Penny and the whole pregnancy/abortion storyline and how Robbie treats both her and Baby’s sister Lisa - spoiler alert he treats them both horribly but in different ways. The mom has almost no agency. Baby thinks she has it, but you can clearly see the difference between when she’s with her family or with fellow upper class Neil and when she’s with Johnny and Penny and Billy - she blossoms into this whole new wonderful person with new insights and opinions about the world because she’s finally seeing outside of the bubble of her family and class. 

The movie does entirely ignore race issues, which is unfortunate. But I’m also guessing that is partly due to the setting - the vacationers would all have been upper class white folk and it seems most of the staff would have been as well. The band leader is a black man, but I think that’s it? IDK if that would have been indicative of the times or not, but it seems like the movie could have figured race into things if it had wanted to. The only other way it’s mentioned is when Neil says when the summer ends, he’s going to join the freedom riders. He seems to say this in order to impress Baby, who has shown she is concerned about social justice issues. And it comes off as a sort of privileged ally-cookie-quest. If Neil’s character did care about civil rights, it was not reflected in the way he treated the lower class staff at his uncle’s resort. 

Despite this lack, however, the movie does a pretty decent job looking at this intersection of gender and class. The way Baby was raised to believe she could change the world, and that this meant she should care about everyone regardless of things like race and class - but then quickly learned that her family (particularly her father) meant she should do these things in a more dignified and distanced way. They sort of humor her ideas of joining the peace corp and studying the economics of undeveloped countries - but the idea of befriending the entertainment staff at the resort is *gasp* Scandal!! 

But because Baby believed in those ideals she was raised with, and hadn’t yet learned the reality of what her parents expected of her - she plows right in and befriends these people whose dancing skill she so admires. She falls in love with dance, and with the people themselves (*ahem* Johnny AND Penny here) and with their easy way of being with one another. 

She rushes in to help wherever and whenever she can, but is still ashamed of her association and hides it from her family. This new world she’s discovered is a sort of guilty secret, and especially so once her relationship with Johnny becomes sexual in nature (AND CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW MUCH AGENCY SHE HAD IN THAT FIRST SEX SCENE LIKE SHE IS JUST GOING ON ABOUT HOW IMPORTANT HE IS TO HER, STARTS TO DANCE WITH HIM, GRABS HIS ASS, AND IS JUST LIKE - YEA BABY LET’S GO!).

So okay, she’s having teh sex and doing teh dance and making teh friends - but it’s still a secret because her family would find it shameful. Does this stop her when she finds out that Johnny is about to be blamed and fired for the theft? SHIT NO it does not! She jumps in to tell the whole world (well okay her family and the Kellerman’s and some other folks in the dining room at the time) that she slept with him that night so he couldn’t have stolen the wallet so THERE! 

And of course he gets fired anyway (I guess for defiling a rich girl? Blech.) but like. When he comes to find her and is all “nobody has ever stood up for me like that! ever!” - I die a little inside because this poor guy has been so beaten down that he doesn’t think he’s good for anything when what WE know about him is that he 1) totally stands by and protects his female bff (possible triad member???? shhh sophy we’re doing a thing here) no matter what and 2) he loves Baby so much because he sees all this good in her and he doesn’t think he deserves her but he is so proud of her and UGH 3) he stops taking the rich guy’s money to sex up his wife because Baby had finally convinced him he was better than that and 4) he works super hard all the time just to make ends meet but would Still have given Penny all his money to help her out and 5) GDI NEIL HE DOESN’T WANNA DO THE PACACHANGA!

All of this culminates when he comes back in and is all “Nobody puts Baby in a corner!” - which is such an epic and cool line but is also super cheesy and a bit nonsensical??? But what he means, really, is that in that moment he sees this woman that he loves sitting quietly in the corner with her parents who are suppressing this passionate and compassionate side of her (well mostly her dad her poor mom doesn’t wtf is going on) and he knows - okay - Johnny Castle KNOWS that Fances Baby Houseman is a fucking STAR okay and he is going to show the whole world (well all of the Kellerman guests and staff anyway) what she can do! PHEW.

So like. Yea, the movie is fun as shit for a lot of reasons. But it’s also so real and vital and important for more reasons than just this one gal’s bisexual/poly pre-awakening (it took another 5-10 years to fully get it - this was the 80′s/90′s in Wisconsin alright we didn’t have the internet back then to explain our sexualities to us!)

I don’t have a nice concluding thesis for this rambly meta except to say that I hope you enjoyed it and also I once again scared the crap out of my cats by singing and dancing a lot - they think singing means I’m sad and lonely so they come to comfort me because they call out and howl when they’re sad and lonely. They are so lovely to come and comfort me but the dancing and singing combo really freaks them out like what are you Doing lady - lady we’re scared - what’s happening? Are you ill??? Should we ... how do .. do cats call 911??? 

Dragon Quest Games Ranked

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Even if you’ve never played a Dragon Quest game, you’ve undoubtedly played other titles influenced by the series. Basic JRPG tropes like the overhead view, turn-based combat, and the medieval fantasy setting all got their start with the original Dragon Quest (then called Dragon Warrior in the West).

While many of these game design innovations are attributed to Final Fantasy, which was released in North America first, the Japanese release of Dragon Quest actually beat Final Fantasy by a full year at a time when Square and Enix were still separate companies. In fact, Final Fantasy probably wouldn’t exist if not for the massive success of Dragon Quest.

Since then, the series has seen plenty of ups and downs. While Dragon Quest has always been a huge hit in Japan, the original game sold so poorly in the U.S. that it was given away with subscriptions to Nintendo Power. Unsurprisingly, a couple of games in the long-running series took more than a decade to see English language releases. But with the most recent game receiving widespread critical acclaim, and even a nod in Super Smash Bros. Ultimate, the series is finally getting the recognition it deserves around the world.

With 2021 marking the 35th anniversary of the first game’s release, there’s no better time rank the best and worst Dragon Quest games in the main series. Unfortunately, we could not include the Japan-only MMORPG Dragon Quest X in this ranking as its never been released in North America.

10. Dragon Quest II: Luminaries of the Legendary Line

1987

Dragon Quest II improved on the original in almost every way, but these days it’s more so viewed as a stepping stone for what the series would become rather than an essential entry. While the first game only allowed for 1v1 encounters, Luminaries of the Legendary Line introduced three-person parties, encounters with multiple enemies, and deeper combat options. 

But those innovations came at a cost, including nasty difficulty spikes and a high encounter rate. Add in a rather rote story about a prince saving the world, and there’s just not much here to justify a playthrough now, even if the many re-releases have slightly improved the gameplay. 

9. Dragon Quest IX: Sentinels of the Starry Skies

2009 

While well-received when it was released, time hasn’t been especially kind to Dragon Quest IX. It remains a high point in the series for allowing lots of customization for both the main character and party members, but that feature was tied to the game’s online capabilities, and Nintendo shut down its DS network years ago. If you try to play Dragon Quest IX now, you’re just not getting the full experience.

Square Enix has shown a strong willingness to remake and re-release Dragon Quest games over the years, and given that we’ve already seen remakes of the first eight games, it seems like it’s only a matter of time until we see Sentinels of the Starry Skies return in all of its customization glory.

8. Dragon Quest

1986

There’s a reason why so many indie RPGs are still built on the bones of this classic: the great grandfather of the JRPG genre holds up remarkably well 35 years after its initial release. Dragon Quest still has incredible charm and addictive gameplay, even if it isn’t the deepest title when compared to modern RPGs. 

With only five towns, five dungeons, and 1v1 battles, Dragon Quest is a simple and relatively quick playthrough by today’s standards, but it perfectly scratches that role-playing itch if you don’t have the energy to spend hours tweaking a character and planning strategies in a modern game. 

7. Dragon Quest VII: Fragments of the Forgotten Past

2000

Arriving at the tail end of the PS1 era, Dragon Quest VII was in many ways a culmination of what many still consider to be the genre’s golden age. Opening on a small island that at first seems to be the only landmass left on the planet, Fragments of the Forgotten Past features one of the most interesting stories in the series, and the challenging gameplay mixed with the deep class system gives it plenty of legs. 

But Dragon Quest VII also suffers from a major Achilles’s heel: its monumental length. The game certainly straddles the line of what can be considered too long, with a single playthrough typically taking around 100 hours. You have to really, really like the sometimes meandering story and the gameplay to get through this installment. Still, if you have the time and patience to put into it, Fragments of the Forgotten Past delivers like few other RPGs. 

6. Dragon Quest III: The Seeds of Salvation

1988

Dragon Quest III is the first title in the series that really feels like a typical JRPG. It was the Dragon Quest game that introduced the ability to swap between multiple party members throughout the adventure, as well as quality of life improvements like quick item sorting and the ability to fill all HP with a menu command. 

Best of all, The Seeds of Salvation features a more fully fleshed out plot than the first two games. Yes, you’re still the legendary hero out to save the world, but this time when you think you’ve won, the “real” evil appears, and it turns out there’s a lot more game to play, a then-innovative plot twist that would become an RPG staple for years to come. 

5. Dragon Quest VI: Realms of Revelation

1995

Realms of Revelation is a really solid entry in the series that arrived way too late in the West to get its proper due. Originally released for the SNES in 1995 at the peak of its popularity, the big hook is switching between a “real world” full of typical medieval castles and villages, and a more surreal “dream world” made up of people’s dreams. There’s definitely a strong Link to the Past influence.

Unfortunately, Dragon Quest’s popularity was at a low point in North America at the time of its original release, and we only saw the excellent DS port of Dragon Quest VI in 2011. See? There is some hope we might see Dragon Quest X in other territories, it just might take another decade or so. 

4. Dragon Quest IV: Chapters of the Chosen

1990

For better or for worse, the Dragon Quest games are notorious for following a pretty strict formula of an unnamed hero gathering a party to venture forth and save the world. Dragon Quest IV was the first game in the series to change things up, and the results are still praised three decades later. Instead of starting off as a hero, the first four chapters see you playing as different party members, before finally meeting up with the protagonist in the fifth chapter. Then you save the world. Okay, so it’s not a huge departure from the other games in the series, but each chapter is really well written.  

Originally released in Japan and North America for the NES, Chapters of the Chosen was also remade for the PlayStation 1. The stateside release of that game was cancelled at the last minute, but a second DS remake featuring a brand new sixth chapter eventually saw a worldwide release in 2008.

3. Dragon Quest VIII: Journey of Cursed King

2004

Journey of the Cursed King is the first game in the Dragon Quest series to feature fully 3D graphics, although the classic gameplay didn’t change much. In fact, you still select attacks in first-person mode. But it does feature one of the better stories in any Dragon Quest game. This time, the nameless hero has to save the king, who has been turned into a troll, and the princess, who has been turned into a white horse. Great characters and the inclusion of voice acting elevate the game above most other Dragon Quest titles, and even most JRPGs of the era.

Thanks to the bright, cel-shaded graphics, Dragon Quest VIII has aged remarkably well for a PS2 game, but the 3DS port, with extra playable characters and new story scenes is arguably the definitive version at this point.

2. Dragon Quest V: Hand of the Heavenly Bride

1992

Dragon Quest V is still the pinnacle of storytelling for the franchise. The game starts with the birth of the hero, and then proceeds to follow him through the ups and downs of the next three decades of his life. For the first and only time in the series, you’re even joined on your quest by your two children. Hand of the Heavenly Bride delves into the life of its main character in a way that few other JRPGs ever have. Add in the ability to recruit monsters to your party for the first time, and you’ve got the recipe for a legendary adventure.

While Dragon Quest V was well-received in Japan, it arrived at a time when sales for the series were so poor in North America that Enix closed down its American office, so the SNES version was never officially localized. Thankfully, the DS remake finally saw a worldwide release in 2009. That version has gotten pricier in the last few years, but it’s well worth tracking down for any RPG fan.

1. Dragon Quest XI: Echoes of an Elusive Age

2017

Echoes an of an Elusive Age is everything that makes the Dragon Quest series great wrapped in a beautiful HD package. The turn-based combat offers more options than ever; the characters, from the magic-wielding sisters Veronica and Serena, to the flamboyant performer Sylvando, are among the most memorable in the entire series; and the story is incredibly deep and emotional. And just when you think you’re finished, a surprising bit of time travel opens up the final third of the game, which is actually its best act.

The original release of Dragon Quest XI would have topped this list, but with the extras added in the 2019 Definitive Edition, it’s going to be difficult for any future title in the series to approach its greatness. Square Enix also added the ability to play the entire game in a 2D mode similar to the Japan-exclusive 3DS version of the game. There are also secret missions that call back to all 10 previous games in the series. Echoes of an Elusive Age is the absolute pinnacle of the series, and easily one of the best RPGs of all time.

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1. BELGIUM

Blanche - “City Lights” 4th place

And so it ends... it only took me TWO MONTHS good lord.

I’m not going to beat around the bush here. The choice to put Blanche at the top of this ranking was easy. There hasn’t been a contestant in a WHILE whose journey I’ve been THIS invested in. (the last time was Tinkara in 2014; ESC rewarding her with a spot in the finale on my BIRTHDAY was the best bday gift I ever received ;__;).

I suppose there *IS* the universal (and not entirely unfounded) criticism that Blanche played a lesser version of the Aminata game and... I don’t remember if i’ve mentioned it before, but I really fucking love Aminata? Even a “watered-down Love Injected” is EASILY the best entry of the year for me, #SorryNotSorry. (though she’s more like Lisa Miskovsky i m o)

There are several things which attract me to Blanche. The Staging, for instance. Sure, it *could* have been better. Did It need to be better? Nah. We were always getting this top four, in that particular order, so it’s fine. The backdrop and lighting were spot on and provided the dynamism it needed. It also features my personal favourite visual effect: Floortile Sorcery:

Mesmerising

I also really love Blanche as a hume. I have a soft spot for the Bèta Introverted Band Geek type of contestant because they feel so disarmingly out-of-place (cf.: Salvador and JOWST, but also past contestants like Tinkara Kovac, Jónsi or Aud Wilken). Blanche shines not in spite her inate lack of star power but because of it. She’s relatable and real. She remains *herself* and in doing so, endeared an entire continent. In other words, she is everything Salvador fans claim Salvador is.

So, about ~That Journey~ or as I would like to call it:

The PASSION OF THE BLANCHE

Blanche is often compared to a wallflower, a lamb, a deer-in-the-headlights, bland, dead-eyed, emotionless and sombre. I would agree had I not rewatched.

On rewatch it became clear to me that Blance was, in fact, arguably the most passionate out of everyone, albeit not within the usual meaning of “intense emotion”, but in the ancient Biblical sense of “experiencing an extensive period of intense suffering”. <3

Naturally, this upset the Value Seeker part of the community who were DEMANDING a Fierceness Injection, but lol I mean Blanche isn’t Aminata and she never will be, deal? She is an introverted, camera-shy schoolgoer who spent most of her interview time looking at her feet  or tripping over the English Language (btw: best Frenglish ever? Yes, defo) If she had tried to pull off “fierce” she’d have failed and flopped and been OUT in the semifinal.

Instead, the Belgian delegation did the most clever thing they ever could have done. They profiled Blanche as vulnerable, desperate, afraid to lose her lover and it worked. The Key change at the end is sublime, symbolizing the BREAK OUT from her icy shell, as she feels her romance slipping through her fingers. Do we *know* the panic, the desperation, the guilt which sets in when such a thing happens? Blance portrayed that perfectly and I was feeling it. So, I’m not bothered that she looks “terrified”; It’s part of her act, you ghouls. Do you think THIS is the face of a scarity-cat shrew?

What I see is a focused young woman who knows precisely what she’s doing. (although the hand gestures are still awks lol but you can’t have everything)

But the Martyrdom of Blanche Christ wasn’t just self-inflicted. She also pulled us, the diehards (you’re still reading about Eurovision in JULY. don’t deny it.) into the ordeal from the second “City Lights” was revealed, which is an extraordinary feat.

You see, there has been a distinct pattern among the Fourth Placers ever since 2013. They always, ALWAYS start out as universally beloved top contenders for their modernized, edgy, too-good-for-Eurovision songs. Then, they have underwhelming rehearsals in which their ratings plummet only to get it together and finish in the top four anyway. Blanche’s journey is precisely that, except she took it to dizzying extremes.

From the moment of the song reveal, the netizen fan community (myself included) took a huge interest in her. No surprise, considering the song is the best (like, it was the fave among pretty much ALL of her fellow competitors. slayage <3), her voice is exceptional and she’s from Top Tier Eurovision Nation Belgium (lmfao @ this being a statement I can type w/o any irony. Well I’d never!).

Naturally, as is bound to happen with pre-show faves, she was the locus of many netizen meltdowns over the course of the pre-show.

From #BadVoiceGate to #WhiteDressGate, #EmptyStagingGate and #ScaredLambGate, Blanche unwittingly fed our collective anxiety and paranoia, taking us for an emotional rollercoaster ride. The Blanche Experience was like watching a psychological drama unfold before our very eyes, with setback after setback after setback gutpunching us towards Bergendahlland until our Heroine, FINALLY, prevailed against all odds and finished in the top anyway. I don’t know about you, but for me, it was a catharsis. Everyone else’s journey pales in comparison to this epic saga of personal growth, intimacy and downright good music. 

In short,

FENK YOO EVRIWAN AL EUV YOORUP MERCI

Decade Rank: 17/324

lol even with that she’s still my lowest ranked #1 for the decade. oh well.

and that concludes my ranking!!!! (just in time because I’m embarking on a three week vacay on Wednesday). I hope you enjoyed it and see you next season for more EUROVISION!! (I may still post from time to time but that will likely be RTV or lit-related)

THE EUROVISION 2017 RANKING:

-ADORE- 1. Belgium (17/324) 2. Belarus (22/324) 3. Macedonia (28/324) 4. Norway (29/324) 5. Lithuania (43/324) 6. Hungary (47/324) -LOVE- 7. Moldova (55/324) 8. Italy (61/324) 9. the Netherlands (63/324) 10. United Kingdom (67/324) 11. Finland (68/324) 12. Estonia (71/324) 13. Azerbaijan (84/324) 14. Latvia (87/324) 15. Israel (93/324)

-LIKE- 16. Bulgaria (100/324) 17. Portugal (105/324) 18. Croatia (115/324) 19. Austria (119/324) 20. France (138/324) 21. Poland (154/324) 22. Armenia (158/324) 23. Romania (164/324)

-OKAY- 24. Iceland (174/324) 25. Ukraine (190/324) 26. San Marino (203/324) 27. Albania (217/324) 28. Denmark (228/324) 29. Spain (237/324) 30. Cyprus (240/324) -DISLIKE- 31. Germany (258/324) 32. Montenegro (263/324) 33. Sweden (270/324) 34. Serbia (275/324) 35. Australia (280/324) 36. Switzerland (286/324) 37. Czech Republic (288/324) 38. Malta (291/324) -HATE- 39. Georgia (301/324) 40. Greece (303/324) 41. Slovenia (307/324) 42. Ireland (312/324)

THE BORISBUBBLES HALL OF ESC FAVES:

1972: the Netherlands (Sandra & Andres - “Als het om de liefde gaat”) 1973: United Kingdom (Cliff Richard - “Power to all our friends”) 1974: Sweden (ABBA - “Waterloo”) 1975: Germany (Joy Fleming - “Ein Lied kann eine Brücke sein”) 1976: Luxembourg (Jürgen Marcus - “Chansons pour ceux qui s’aiment”) 1977: Belgium (Dream Express - “A Million in 1-2-3″) 1978: Israel - (Izhar Cohen & Alfabeta - “A Ba Ni Bi” 1979: Germany (Dschinghis Khan - “Dschinghis Khan”) 1980: Luxembourg (Sofie & Magaly - “Papa Pingouïn”) 1981: Belgium (Emly Starr - “Samson”) 1982: Germany (Nicole - “Ein Bißchen Frieden”) 1983: Israel (Ofra Haza - “Chai”) 1984: Ireland (Linda Martin - “Terminal 3″) 1985: Finland (Sonja Lumme - “Eläköön Elämä”) 1986: Belgium (Sandra Kim - “J’aime la vie”) 1987: Belgium (Liliane Saint-Pierre - “Soldiers of love”) 1988: Switzerland (Céline Dion - “Ne partez pas sans moi”) 1989: Turkey (Pan - “Bana Bana”) 1990: Yugoslavia (Tajci - “Hajde, da ludujemo”) 1991: Sweden (Carola - “Fångad av en stormvind”) 1992: Denmark (Lotte Nilson & Kenny Lübke - “Alt det som ingen ser”) 1993: the Netherlands (Ruth Jacott - “Vrede”) 1994: Germany (MeKaDo - “Wir geben ‘ne Party”) 1995: Cyprus (Alexandros Panayi - “Sti fotia”) 1996: Croatia (Maja Blagdan - “Sveta Ljubav”) 1997: Poland (Anne-Marie Jopek - “Ale jestem”) 1998: the Netherlands (Edsilia Rombley - “Hemel en aarde”) 1999: Croatia (Doris Dragovic - “Marija Magdalena”) 2000: Latvia (Brainstorm - “My star”) 2001: France (Natasha St. Pier - “Je n’ai que mon âme”) 2002: Spain (Rosa - “Europe’s living a celebration”) 2003: Germany (Lou - Let’s get happy”) 2004: Albania (Anjeza Shahini - “Image of you”) 2005: Romania (Luminita Anghel & Sistem - “Let me try”) 2006: Iceland (Silvia Night - “Congratulations”) 2007: Georgia (Sopho - Visionary Dream”) 2008: Iceland (Euroband - “This is my life”) 2009: Iceland (Yohanna - “Is it true?”) 2010: Albania (Juliana Pasha - “It’s all about you”) 2011: Germany (Lena - “Taken by a stranger”) 2012: Sweden (Loreen - “Euphoria”) 2013: Greece (Koza Mostra ft. Agathonas Iakovidis - “Alcohol is free”) 2014: Slovenia (Tinkara Kovac - “Round and round”) 2015: Latvia (Aminata - “Love Injected”) 2016: Armenia (Iveta Mukuchyan - “LoveWave”) 2017: Belgium (Blanche - “City Lights”)

For as long as television has been around, most American TV shows have obeyed one rule: The show must go on.

This means that no matter what befalls a series — from a contract dispute causing the studio to fire the leading lady from a show named after her, to arguments over pay leading to the Dukes of Hazzard being replaced by their cousins, to countless examples of shows that have had to make cast changes when actors left because they got bored or were fired or even died — that series will continue in some form.

Often, it will become a misbegotten hybrid version of itself. But every so often, a show’s retooling, forced by the network or undertaken by showrunners desperate to make a series work, might lead to something better than what existed before.

Look no further than internet favorite Parks & Recreation for an example of a show that kept tinkering with its formula all the way into its third season, until it attained its final form. Fan favorite characters like Ben Wyatt (Adam Scott) and Chris Traeger (Rob Lowe) didn’t join the cast until the end of season two, and on their way in, they saw original character Mark Brendanawicz (Paul Schneider) make his way out. And that’s to say nothing of the many tiny tweaks to the show’s premise and characters that its writers made throughout its run.

But occasionally, a TV show falls apart under such spectacular, headline-generating circumstances that its return — under whatever form it takes — is tracked with fervent anticipation, less because anybody hopes it might be good and more because we’re morbidly curious to see what happens.

That curiosity is why the first episode of The Conners — ABC’s Roseanne-less spin on Roseanne — should draw a large audience for its first episode tonight. But if those viewers stick around, it’ll be for one simple reason: The Conners is pretty good.

The Roseanne revival was the biggest show of the spring. ABC

In case you’ve somehow forgotten the particulars of the Roseanne firestorm that took place over three months earlier this year — yes, it took place over just three months, and it took place earlier this year — the basic contours of the story are pretty simple.

ABC decided in 2017 to bring back Roseanne, the hit series that ran from 1988 through 1997 in its original incarnation. The series had always been blunt about what it’s like to live in the United States without a lot of money, and in its best seasons, it was as good as any show had ever been at confronting the ways that oppressive systems conspire to keep people in the lower classes from climbing the economic ladder, and looking at how racism and sexism too often divided those lower classes.

Roseanne Conner — the “fictional” Roseanne — was a riff on Roseanne Barr’s standup comedy, but as the series continued and Barr gained more and more power over her fictional self, she pushed the series in a bolder and brasher direction. It was a progressive series, in the sense that it was tuned in to big-picture issues and more often than not took a left-leaning stand on those issues. But its politics always followed from its characters.

So bringing back Roseanne in 2018 made a certain amount of sense. And it also made a certain amount of sense that Roseanne Conner would be a Donald Trump supporter in 2018. After all, plenty of lower class white people, bristling with racial resentments, voted for Trump in 2016. There was just one problem: Barr herself was a big-time Trump supporter, and her support frequently took the form of alt-right conspiracy mongering.

It didn’t matter. Not really. This new spin on Roseanne debuted to massive numbers (more than 18 million live viewers!) in late March, and Barr’s status as perhaps the most famous Trump supporter in Hollywood ignited a long series of arguments revolving around whether the fictional Roseanne’s similar Trump support, much milder in fashion than the real Roseanne’s Trump support, was an irresponsible gloss meant to cover up Barr’s tweeting of conspiracy theories.

But the ratings were great. The show was, by some metrics, the number one show on TV in the 2017-’18 TV season, and ABC was a network in desperate need of a hit. Despite the presence of much-in-demand actors like Laurie Metcalf, John Goodman, and Sara Gilbert in the ensemble cast, who might have balked at returning for another season but evidently didn’t, Roseanne was renewed for a second season. Everything was going perfectly.

And then Barr tweeted something racist, comparing Valerie Jarrett, a former Obama aide and a black woman, to a monkey. She seemed contrite at first, then offered a variety of excuses — including that Ambien had made her do it and that she didn’t know Jarrett was black — but the damage was done.

After a matter of hours, many people associated with the show had spoken out, Barr was fired, Roseanne was canceled, and network television had seen its most unlikely series end in decades. (It’s worth noting here that ABC president Channing Dungey is a black woman herself.)

Yet over the weeks following the end of Roseanne, those involved in the show kept wistfully saying things along the lines of, “Boy, wouldn’t it be great if there could be some sort of spinoff?” This hinted that talks were already in progress to create just such a spinoff, and eventually, The Conners — about the Conner family sans its matriarch — was born.

It’s a cynical cash-grab, and one that might not even work. How many people were watching Roseanne’s return to see a prominent Trump supporter own the libs? And how many people were watching Roseanne because they liked its title character? However many, ABC has to be hoping there are enough people who were watching Roseanne for something other than its title character to make The Conners a modest hit. And here’s the twist — it deserves to be.

The cast of The Conners — notice anybody missing? ABC

I liked new Roseanne a fair amount, but it eventually stomped all over at least some of its promise, as Vulture’s Kathryn VanArendonk pointed out in a review of the finale (which ended, somewhat improbably, with the Conners being saved from a massive flood by a Trump-ordered deployment of FEMA). Like the original series, the 2018 iteration of the show still contained moments of stark desperation, of caustic humor directed at the dire financial straits the characters found themselves in. But it never quite worked its way up to calling out the star on her bullshit, either in reality or on the show itself. It always felt like a half-measure of a show, even in its very best installments.

I’m not sure The Conners — of which I’ve seen two episodes — is the full measure, but it’s at least three-quarters of a measure. Without Barr sucking up all of the oxygen in the show (and its marketing), The Conners is better able to realize much of what the new Roseanne was aiming for: to tell stories about how lower-class white Americans find themselves drifting further and further from whatever American dream they thought might be theirs.

Suffice to say, a lot of the show’s success in this regard is linked to how it chooses to write out the character who once gave the series its name. I’m unable to tell you just how Roseanne leaves the franchise, but the choice The Conners makes gives its terrific cast (especially Goodman, Gilbert, Metcalf, and Lecy Goranson) some stellar material to play. And that choice similarly zeroes in on what the show was at least trying to say back in its incarnation as the most recent (and ultimately final) season of Roseanne.

For one thing, The Conners doesn’t try to force political or social issues into episodes with the frequency that Roseanne did in the spring. Yes, those issues are still present, because they inform the tapestry of the Conners’ lives. But the show’s conflicts are often more rooted in just how far behind the family is on its bills, or in a character’s drinking problem, or in a growing divide between ex-spouses, rather than whatever’s in the headlines.

They aren’t timely issues, because they’ve existed as long as humanity has. But by placing them in the context of this family, at this particular point in time, they take on the feeling of timeliness, while allowing The Conners to divorce itself from lots of fights over Trump.

The two episodes I screened also made me laugh quite a bit. None of the jokes are going to be all-timers — okay, maybe one line about Pierce Brosnan will make it into the time capsule (it’s in the second episode that was screened for critics, which looks to be the fourth to air) — but the characters have a warm and funny way about them that the original Roseanne had in spades and the new version too often replaced with mean-spirited insults and the like. While the characters still tease and insult each other incessantly, there’s more warmth to it.

Plus, not having Roseanne around has given The Conners a stronger spine, while also giving much of the supporting cast more to do. Metcalf and Goranson are the chief beneficiaries, both receiving plenty of great moments throughout the two episodes screened, but Roseanne’s absence also allows Goodman and Gilbert to move to the show’s center as a man learning to rethink his entire life and a woman who aimed to leave her past behind but ended up trapped in the life she was trying to escape.

The Conners isn’t afraid to push for big, emotional moments, and its more dramatic sequences are often stronger than the jokes. If you have any affection for these characters, I can’t imagine you won’t be moved by what they go through.

But that gets at the very question now driving this franchise — how much of the success of new Roseanne stemmed from it being a solid, sturdy version of a big, hit show from TV’s past, and how much of it stemmed from the star becoming Hollywood’s stalking horse for an unpopular president that, nevertheless, has a deeply committed fan base?

Did the people who watched Roseanne in 2018 really want a thoughtful show that tackled the social and political issues of the day via beloved TV characters, or did they just want a TV star who was angry, because they, too, felt angry?

The fact that there are plenty of great TV comedies tackling social and political issues without nearly the viewership of Roseanne doesn’t bode especially well for the former option. But for the sake of The Conners earning the chance to further sharpen its voice, I hope it’s the latter.

The Conners debuts tonight on ABC at 8 pm Eastern.

Original Source -> How the Roseanne revival evolved into The Conners — and became a better show in the process

via The Conservative Brief

It: Chapter One

Disclaimer: Views are mine. Date and Year of Release: September 8, 2017 Cast: Bill Skarsgård, Jaeden Lieberher, Jackson Robert Scott, Sophia Lillis, Chosen Jacobs, Finn Wolfhard, Nicholas Hamilton, Jack Dylan Grazer, Jeremy Ray Taylor, and Wyatt Oleff. Director: Andy Muschietti Running Time: 135 minutes I had been waiting for this film ever since the first rumors and the eventual proof of the remake were splashed across media. What got me intrigued: (i) it was based on a Stephen King (Master of Horror) story and (ii) the casting of Bill Skaarsgaard as the eponymous Pennywise, the Dancing Clown. He is the member of the famed (and rightly so) Skaarsgaard acting dynasty, and got the acting chops (for reference check: TV series Hemlock Grove where he acted as the soulful and brooding outsider-vampire Roman Godfrey, unaware of his true lineage; the Swedish films- Simple Simon which is one of the best films on autism; and Simon and the Oaks where he is a working class boy trying to find his way at the peak of World War II). As a kid, I watched Tim Curry’s sadistic take on Pennywise, and it had quite the impact on me. Particularly, it shaped how I viewed clowns. I am not afraid of clowns, but am no fan either. Earlier, I used to be excited whenever a circus would wind up in my sleepy little beautiful town. Watching the antics of the clowns would leave me in splits. But Tim Curry changed that perception. If one goes by numbers, a large number of people in the USA suffer from Coulrophobia, and the media has only worked to sustain this fear of clowns. Recently, the creators- Ryan Murphy and Brad Falchuk of another favourite TV show, American Horror Story has received flak for depiction of the scary clown in the form of Twisty, the Clown in Season 5 titled Freak Show. But, in their defense, I would say that Twisty is a take on the notorious American serial killer John Wayne Gacy aka “Killer Clown” (who killed at least 33 boys in the 1970’s and who dressed as Pogo, the clown at charity events and children’s parties. He was also viewed as an upstanding member of his society). Watching the 2017 version made me remember my own experience of watching the Tim Curry version, Twisty, and my fascination with serial killers from a psychological stand point. From the go, the film set the pace right. Beginning with a moody piano at the background, the film starts with the Denbrough siblings and the pitter patter raindrops. Set in 1988, elder brother Bill makes a paper-boat for his younger brother Georgie, who proceeds to set it sail. He runs after it as it moves ahead. This sets sail the eventual unleashing of horror as the boat accidentally gets inside the sewer and we get to see the macabre Pennywise charming Georgie before eventually taking him, and worming his way in the fictional town of Derry in Maine beginning his terror on Bill and his gang of losers in 1989. Pennywise is ‘it’ and ‘it’ takes the form of Pennywise- a shapeshifter, assuming the form of individual fears of each of the children, and a trans-dimensional entity feeding on ‘fear’. Each of the children see it in the form of what they fear the most. To know what their individual fears are one has to watch the movie. The movie climaxes as the children unite to battle the demon, who promises to rise again. I had gone to watch this film alone and even though I was surrounded by girls, we collectively shuddered at every twist. This film comes at an interesting time. I say this because we live in a time where fear grips our imagination. Donald Trump in the USA is only the tip of the iceberg. Every nation now employs fear as a tactic to keep the citizens under its rule. I say fear in the context of politics and the theme of the film. Pennywise strikes when no one looks or says a word against it. The residents of Derry are aware that children are disappearing and yet pretend otherwise. The residents are also aware that these disappearances happen every 27 years. At the end it is upon the gang of “losers” to fight the demon by standing against it united and telling it, on its face, that they are unafraid of it. The central theme of this film is not Pennywise, but fear which sets the moody ambience. Of course, one has to take note of who has directed the film- Andy Muschietti (of another horror film, Mama fame). Mama had its obvious flaws, but that film too dealt with the horror of fear and what it makes one do. In the case of Mama, it was the fear of losing children, and how a Mother’s love lives on even in a supernatural dimension. I wonder if he is the Jim Jarmusch of the horror genre. Jim Jarmusch is known for his depiction of moody antiheroes (Dead Man, Only Lovers Left Alive). Andy Muschietti’s supernatural beings are not monsters themselves, but a reflection of monstrosity we see in day-to-day life. I would place him next to Guillermo del Toro’s humanizing take on monsters (The Orphanage, The Devil’s Backbone, Crimson Peak and the TV series, Strain based on the books he himself wrote). Similar to Toro’s demons, Andy too depicts ‘It’ as more human than humans themselves. Pennywise only attempts to reflect. Kudos to Andy for giving us a masterpiece. Next, I am not disappointed with Bill Skaarsgaard who takes on this challenging role with an intensity, charisma and madness that Tim Curry so generously gave to his version of Pennywise. Unlike Tim Curry though, Bill is sinister. Just like fear is. Fear is sinister and makes one commit the sinister. And what a performance. I remembered his role of Roman Godfrey in each frame. In the Netflix horror series, Bill portrayed a vampire with grace. He portrayed Pennywise with the same grace, that actors don’t often portray as titular monsters. I am sure many critics will say that he has the Skaarsgaard name, but no. His siblings and parents have made a name for themselves, and he stands out with this role of a lifetime. Interestingly, his elder brother Alexander Skaaarsgaard portrayed the character of the vampire Eric in True Blood and that had a charm, unique to Alexander. I think I will wait for Bill’s work in the years to come. And yes, the right choice for Pennywise, considering that another heavy weight Tilda Swinton was also considered for this role. Bill was considered for his build as one of the producers noted him being tall and lanky and a bit clown-like in his mannerisms, and for bringing his own take on how Pennywise should be. Further, the casting is perfect. Finn Wolfhard as Richie (of Stranger Things fame) is the adorable extroverted nerd; Jaeden Lieberher as Bill, the elder brother with a speech impediment; Jeremy Ray Taylor as Ben, the new kid in town bullied for being overweight; Sophia Lillis as Beverly, another new kid who is slut shamed for simply not fitting in; Wyatt Oleff as Stan, the Jewish kid at odds with his religious beliefs and his own coming of age pragmatism; Chosen Jacobs as Mike, the African American whose parents death haunts him; and Jack Dylan Grazer as Eddie who struggles with being a hypochondriac. They form the Losers Club- a gang who do not fit in. Opposed to this club, is the gang of violent troublemakers led by Henry Bowers (played by Nicholas Hamilton to perfection) that bullies the Losers. What an amazing performance by each one of the kids. I love watching children act precisely because it can come from a place of innocence and coming of age. Needless to say, in an environment where elders in Derry do not check bullying because often, they are bullies themselves, ‘It’ manifests. The actor who steals the show for me; however, is Jackson Robert Scott who so innocently portrayed the character of 7 year old Georgie, and later turns malevolent (for reference: the sink scene in the Basement scene). Next, themes in the film stands out- it remains true to Stephen King’s themes of anti-bullying, anti-fear, pro-acceptance and pro-outsiders. (Carrie, Misery, The Shining). That it is okay to be what you want to be. The remake celebrates these in the form of Pennywise. Finally, the soundtrack by Benjamin Wallfisch is brilliant and sets the tone of the film. There is something visceral about children singing in horror films. It is spine tingling, because it pits the innocence of children against the loss of innocence. The music does this well. Right from the first scene- the mood is set with the piano piece. As young Georgie is about to lose his childhood in the form of death, a lady (possibly his mother) plays the piano. Bill cannot accompany him because he is sick and bed ridden. We see the impending doom in the form of the continuous rain as seen dripping from the window panes while the curtains are still. Truly sets the ambience. A good background score is always important in horror movies. Guillermo del Toro uses music well. The background score of Mama was good as well. Rating: 5/5 - This is a must watch. The strength of this film is that Pennywise strikes when you expect him to. This goes against the norm (as seen in the films by M. Night Shyamalan where you know that the monster will strike but not when). Here, you know precisely when. This is vital for this film for without it, the impact is not there. You will not sit on the edge of your seat. But it will terrify you, nonetheless. Pennywise is fear after all, who ironically fears that others do not fear him enough. Like Pennywise, fear lurks everywhere. The only way to fight ‘It’ is to stand united. Much like in the world today. We need more horror movies. No other genre is subversive as this genre. Hope you watch this film after this review. Please do. Maybe we can discuss about your thoughts.