what if lois lane was a plus size babe? inspired by conversations with the lovely @milfmisspiggy and the gorgeous original piece by Julian Totino Tedesco, which can be found below the cut ! :3 (also click for better quality, tumblr is killing meee)

NOBODY TOLD ME ABOUT DOUMAN WEARING LEDERHOSEN WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN GERMANY MEIN BRUDER

Meine Tür ist offen falls er vorbei kommen will ngl-

Christmas is in like 3 days???

I haven't gotten anyone anything.....

I might need to go shopping tomorrow....

do you guys understand. im looking directly in ur eyes do you understand me do you get it do

sometimes i am a decent writer

Just as I was about to go in-game to FINALLY start setting up the opera, the EA app broke. 

Fine. No big deal. Repair app, then play game? 

EA: NO. YOU MUST REPAIR SIMS 4 BECAUSE IT ALSO BROKE.

Me: But EA, if I repair then it’ll update my game to the horrible face bug update...

EA: Not my problem. 

Me: ...

So now...I’m sitting here with a broken game and no chance to actual move my story along. 

"star wars is fictional, literally none of these things happened in real life!!!"

correct me if I'm wrong but didn't julius caesar overthrew the senate, destroyed the roman republic, created the roman empire and became the first roman emperor?

I want those two (Peach and Plum) to fuck eachother senseless

I mean um what huh did I say something naaaah

The good news is they do on the regular.

Plum even gets the chance to wreck that big dope whenever she likes, if she asks nicely enough in just the right ways. Peach is not a monster, can’t deny her wife what she wants, when and if she wants it.

Sometimes however they have to work hard to get what they want so. No pain no gain!

I’m so tired I feel like I’m slowly sinking into my bed

Now that I’m re-reading Legion, I’m wondering the circumstances in which the Archivist learned about Wes.

Mist only refers to him as Riley’s Hacker Friend, which could mean 1 of 2 things: either Wes is the shady person behind Riley’s back who acts as an underground puppetmaster and was never connected to the disappearance of eighteen-year-old Wesley Higgins, or Mist was warned beforehand that there is no way better to make the terrifying Ex-Basilisk angry than to breathe towards threatening his friend. Or, somehow, a combination of the two.

Which is to say, the Archivist knew Wes. Talon did not.

Kind of hard not to take note of the newest part of Roth’s hoard, because the Archivist hoards knowledge and Roth hoards talent. Wesley Higgins was skilled enough at age fourteen to be stolen from the birthplace of St. George, the one place that Talon cannot go. Wesley Higgins only stayed in the dark about Talon’s true operations until he was sixteen, and then began working under a Talon Senior VP because keeping him in the dark any longer would be a waste. Wesley Higgins also made it no secret that he did not want to be here. Wesley Higgins managed to collect blackmail on Talon, the organization that specializes in blackmail.

The Archivist, specifically, specializes in blackmail.

There’s no way he wasn’t aware of Wes. As someone running a parallel secret organization within Talon, having a talented hacker who has no loyalty to Talon would be incredibly appealing to the Archivist. He was probably trying to poach this kid ever since he turned sixteen, but it’s hard to steal from another dragon’s hoard. It’s even harder when the thing he’s trying to steal is making it pretty damn clear that he doesn’t take kindly to dragons. Who, like most humans, wouldn’t see the difference between working for Talon and working for the Archivist when neither are human. So acquiring Wes would take time, and the Archivist has a lot of patience, but all the patience in the world doesn’t matter when Wesley Higgins was only under Roth’s employ for another two years before he dropped off the grid and was never seen again.

And sure, Roth knew where he went, because Roth knew who stole that file from St. George that so mysteriously went missing, which was then used to start Cobalt’s underground. And Roth definitely knows who blackmailed him. Wes wasn’t exactly slick in where he went. But for Roth, losing part of his hoard escaped was bad enough. He wasn’t about to admit to the rest of Talon that said part of his hoard blackmailed him and then started stealing hatchlings, because that’s how you lose your job. So Wesley Higgins stays missing. Maybe a body that looks like him mysteriously washes up in a river somewhere. And Cobalt gains a shadowy puppetmaster, shrouded in even more mystery than the ex-Basilisk itself.

The Archivist assumes that Wesley Higgins is a lost opportunity. A shame, a waste of potential, but potential doesn’t mean much, and it’s not like he would have been any more agreeable to the Archivist than he was for Roth, when the Archivist is just another dragon.

Twelve years later, Talon sends one of his lowercase-a archivists on a suicide mission to kill Cobalt. She is, to the shock of everyone including herself, left alive. About two months later, Cobalt breaks into his Vault with the Elder Wyrm’s daughter and Dr. Olsen’s son. Oh, and his little human hacker friend, whose mention made an ex-Basilisk so pale and stiff when it came from the Archivist’s mouth, which means that Cobalt actually cares about his puppetmaster. His very skilled puppermaster, considering he was able to cut a hole through his electronic security as efficiently as any of Talon’s elites. It takes hours before his own technicians can recover enough from the security cameras to get a picture of him.

And apparently the Archivist misread Wesley Higgins, because he’s been working alongside a dragon for twelve years with no issues. He’s older now, as he watches the grown man on the camera carefully leaf through the Archivist’s electronic information and steal even more company secrets than he already has, but it’s unmistakably him. The human that outran Roth, outran the Archivist, and ran straight to Cobalt.

The best thing to do for Talon, of course, would be to inform the Elder Wyrm who Cobalt’s puppermaster is. It would certainly give the Archivist more credibility with the Elder Wyrm, what with making the underground easier to pin down, and would serve a nice bonus of destabilizing Roth’s power— maybe even enough to keep him from trying to bring Dante Hill into his hoard, because the Archivist would love the chance to collect the second son of the Elder Wyrm.

The Archivist instead files this information away for a rainy day. He’s sure it will come in handy.

me, constantly wondering how they handled Gwen's death. Like how did he get from that clock tower to her grave. Did he call the emergency services? Did he do it as Spider-Man, or as Peter? What's the official explanation? If he did it as Spider-Man, does that mean they put her death on him? Does her family know? Does this mean Peter had to go through and face her family knowing he was responsible? Do people know officially about Harry or was that swept under the Oscorp rug? SO MANY QUESTIONS

Europeans stop acting like you're inherently smarter than everyone else on the planet challenge

Name a more iconic duo than western commies and dismissing the lived experiences of actual survivors of actual communist regimes

it was steve jobs fault that flash shut down. btw.

Why is my type literally someone who could break me in half but is funny and also broody trickster emo boys

When your in a fandom for almost a year and you just now realize that discduo is tommy and dream, not tommy and tubbo