fuck man, im feelin real warm and fuzzy about 💫💫gender💫💫💫 rn

i was lovescrolling thru the enby tag bc sometimes life is shit and you need a little positive reinforcement from literally anywhere god please someone call me by the right pronouns i beg of you

and it got me thinking about some of these small things people did for me in regards to the whole queer thing that im still really grateful for, like some of it was basic shit but fuck did it mean a lot to me

so thanks to

My doctor who remembers to use my correct pronouns every time I see her, assured me she wouldn’t say anything to my mom, gave me a number for a gender clinic I could speak to if I was so inclined, and told me she’d change the information on my files the moment it was safe to do so (I didn’t want to risk someone accidentally telling my parents)

My two best friend who bought me a binder for my birthday without me even saying anything because they thought it might make me feel more comfortable

One of my friend’s ex-boyfriends who once texted me on a random weekday while he was in class because he accidentally misgendered me in a conversation with her and wanted to apologize

The girl in my chemistry class who has the same English teacher as me in a different period and spent an hour and a half jumping through hoops to avoid misgendering or outing me before thinking to ask if I was out to people at school

My study hall teacher who listened to me complain about not being able to see my girlfriend because she’s grounded without batting an eye and then let her spend her lunch period in class

My health teacher who made it a point to avoid splitting the class up by sex whenever possible and when it wasn’t reminded us constantly that it was based on bodily function and not gender

My girlfriend’s friend Sheldon who fist bumped me when I told him I wasn’t a girl

The nurse who checked my vitals before and after getting my gallbladder taken out who had a rainbow flag sticker on her badge and listened to me when I told her I was a little terrified that I might accidentally come out to my parents when I was under anthesis (she promised me that I’d likely be far too out of it to be making any actual sense)

The school nurse who let my rest in a private area of her office because I’d worn my binder for like a week and a half straight and was starting to have a lot chest pain and didn’t say a word to my parents

My teachers in general for being awesome and never saying a fucking thing to my parents about girlfriends or gay jokes or pronouns or anything of the sort, truly angels

Anyone who’s ever complimented my rainbow button pin

My brother who lent me his old clothes despite my mom not wanting me to wear men’s clothing and also convincing her to let me cut my hair as short as I want

My writing mentor who compared religious queer trauma with me and also understood all of the very unsubtle queer symbolism I was shoving into my writing

My first crush who came out as nonbinary and gay, and hugged me when I pulled an uno reverse card on them

Every friend of mine who made a whole bunch of gender jokes and puns with me when I first came-out because I was nervous as hell and I desperately needed something to normalize it so I didn’t feel like I was some strange alien every time I corrected someone on my pronouns

All the people who post those ‘you are valid’ posts, I’m slightly embarrassed to admit that one those made me cry bc I was on my period and feeling shit and I really needed to hear that so thanks to that random stranger in particular

‘✩’ heart eyes//

The Ultimate Relationship Meme!

Disagreements:

Family:

Do your muses plan on having children/or have children? Definitely plan on it! Be it biological children or adoption, they’ve totally talked about it and plan on having a family~If so, how many children do your muses want/have? Dennis’s mentioned wanting twins to Aoi (which they’ll probably have twin daughters Who is the favorite parent? Leans a little more towards Dennis thanks to his expertise with magic Who is the authoritative parent? Aoi TRIES to be, but we all know how that works out XDWho is more likely to allow the children to have a day off school? Aoi! At least, for legitimate sick reasons, and if they’re just burned out she’ll give them a day to just stay home and relax. She and Dennis both agree they need their schooling (especially since they’ll be getting better schooling than they did), but everyone needs a sick day!Who lets the children indulge in sweets and junk food when the other isn’t around? Dennis~ And usually through magic tricks, to boot~Who turns up to extra curricular activities to support their children? They both do! Unless one of them’s out of town, they wouldn’t miss it for the world!Who goes to parent teacher interviews? They both do, though Dennis often has to nudge Aoi along once they’re there. She’s not exactly fond of meeting with teachers and he knows sometimes, she needs a little coaxing to keep walking. Who changes the diapers? They both do~Who gets up in the middle of the night to feed the baby? Both, taking turns with it - But they’re also both prone to the first one up taking care of everything so the other can get the rest they need.Who spends the most time with the children? Totally tied~ Aoi works from home and while they both hold ties still to Academia, their home is in Heartland now, giving magic shows and helping out as much as possible. They’re rarely far from their kids~Who packs their lunch boxes? Tag team effort! They take half each and write little notes to add in, signing them together Who gives their children ‘the talk’? Dennis. Aoi’s too busy being a blushy, flustered mess in the corner and she trusts Dennis to be informative without being embarrassing with it - And if all else fails, it’s time to bring in Uncle Aster!Who cleans up after the kids? They both do~Who worries the most? Dennis, though he tries not to show it. Aoi’s not far behind him on that front.Who are the children more likely to learn their first swear word from? Uncle Shun. XD

Affection:

Who likes to cuddle? They both love it~! At the end of the day, it’s kindda easy to find them flopped somewhere, cuddling and winding down~Who is the little spoon? Aoi~ She loves the feeling of security of being the little spoon to his big~Who gets naughty in the most inappropriate of places? Aoi slips occasionally - Definitely not on purpose, but if it happens, 99 times out of 100 it’s her fault XDWho struggles to keep their hands to themself?  Aoi! She finds comfort in knowing he’s there, so she’s always trying to keep him close, even with something as small as holding his hand.How long can they cuddle until one becomes uncomfortable? uncomfortable enough to change positions? Probably about 30, 45 minutes or so? To actually STOP cuddling? Pffffft they could be cuddling for hours~Who gives the most kisses? Aoi! She’s prone to just outright peppering Dennis in little kisses, especially when she’s excited What is their favourite non-sexual activity? Magic shows (either for each other or for Heartland’s kids), dueling, and cooking~Where is their favourite place to cuddle? On the couch, in front of a movie - Though second place goes to in bed (especially after a nightmare).Who is more likely to playfully grope the other? Aoi~How often do they get time to themselves? Before they have kids, pretty often; they have quite a few pets and help in rebuilding Heartland, but otherwise they live alone and enjoy it. After they have kids, their time alone is usually kept to when the house is otherwise empty, or in the evenings, when all the kids’re in bed

Sleeping:

Who snores? Neither~ One of them might occasionally snort of make a noise, but there’’s not really any snoring~If both do, who snores the loudest? Neither~Do they share a bed or sleep separately? When they first started living together, they slept separately, save for when nightmares hit. After getting together, though, they kindda migrated towards sharing a bed.If they sleep together, do they cozy up together or lay far apart? Cozy up~ Who talks in their sleep? Aoi does, though it’s incredibly rare and usually due to a really severe nightmare-What do they wear to bed? Aoi has a pair of short pink plaid shorts and a light pink tanktop, though she later picks up a nightgown or two for warmer nights. Dennis likely ends up in sleep pants and a random shirt~Are either of your muses insomniacs? They have odd night when neither of them can seep, but they’re not exactly insomniacs-Can sleeping pills be found by the bedside? Not unless one of them is really sick and can’t sleep.Do they wrap their limbs around each other or just lay side by side? Wrap their limbs around each other~ Aoi’s a cuddler when it comes to bedtime - even if they don’t stay that way, they at least start with it~Who wakes up with bed hair? They both do, but Dennis’s is more easily managed XDWho wakes up first? Dennis! Aoi rarely ever gets up before he does~Who prepares breakfast in bed for the other? They’re both prone to this, but slightly more Aoi. She loves spoiling him rotten~What is their favourite sleeping position? If they’re not spooning to sleep, Aoi’s snuggled up into his side with his arms loosely wrapped around her Who hogs the sheets? Dennis~ Half the time as a joke, the other half just naturally tangling up in them~Do they set an alarm each night? While Dennis doesn’t nessecarially need one, they keep one set for Aoi, just to make sure she’s not sleeping in to noon. XD Otherwise, they only really set one if they have to be up early the next morning, of if it’s a school day and they need to get their kids up.Can a television be found in their bedroom? A small one, perhaps - Not too often used, but when it is it’s usually for cheap horror movies XDWho has nightmares? Both. They don’t exactly like talking about them, but they do.Who has ridiculous dreams? Aoi - Bear in tutus anyone? XDWho sprawls out and takes up most of the bed? Aoi does, though usually as a joke XD Occassionally she finds Dennis doing it and she cracks up every time~Who makes the bed? Team effort~!What time is bed time? Whenever they get there, really? They enjoy stargazing and have a habit of falling asleep on the couch cuddling, so they rarely have a set bed time for themselves - But they do set one for the kids~Any routines/rituals before bed? Aoi spends some time letting down and brushing out her hair, and they brush their teeth together. Dennis checks and makes sure the doors are locked and the pets (and kids) are comfortable and settled, and after some joking and teasing, it’d off to bed they go~ Though the teasing tends to wind down into some softer, lighter talking once they’re under the covers~Who’s the grumpiest when they wake up? Dennis, until he gets his coffee

Work:

Who is the busiest? Originally Dennis, since he’s more active in the rebuilding efforts and magic shows (With his co-star, Aoi~), though Aoi catches up once she starts making clothes to sell.Who rakes in the highest income? Kindda tied? Possibly moreso Dennis-Are any of your muses unemployed? For a bit, they both technically are, though his ties to Academia ensure he still has work if he needs it, though they both later end up working.Who takes the most sick days? Aoi, considering she works from home and is her own boss~Who is more likely to turn up late to work? Still Aoi~Who sucks up to their boss? Dennis XDWhat are their jobs? They both volunteer and help rebuild Heartland, and also put on magic shows for the kids. Aside from that, Dennis still holds ties to Academia and teaches the XYZ Dimension’s kids how to duel and how to be dueltainers. Aoi occasionally joins in on his classes, but she also starts a clothing line to help out everyone.Who stresses the most? Pretty even- Aoi’s more likely to show it, though.Do your muses enjoy or despise their careers/occupations? Absolutely love it~ Aside from Academia, Aoi’d still be happy to see the place roast-Are your muses financially stable?For the most part, yep. They’re not gonna go on any extravagant spending spree, but they really don’t have to worry about too much.

Home:

Who does the washing? Aoi~Who takes out the trash? Dennis~Who does the ironing? Aoi, only because she swears he’d probably try a magic trick with the iron and would rather not nurse a burn - She’s teasing, though~!Who does the cooking? They both do, and they have fun with it~Who is more likely to burn the house down just trying? Neither!Who is messier? Aoi, though she tries not to be~Who leaves the toilet roll empty? Aoi might occasionally, but it’s not often-Who leaves their dirty clothes on the floor? Rarely on both of them, but it’s usually on days they’re both drop-dead tired and just want to crawl into bed.Who forgets to flush the toilet? Neither~Who is the prankster around the house? Both of them like you wouldn’t believe-! XD Pranking is one of their favorite passtimes XDWho loses the car keys when it comes time to go somewhere? Aoi does - It’s why she hands Dennis the keys and lets him handle it, especially after losing them a few dozen times!Who mows the lawn? Dennis~Who answers the telephone? They both do, but there’s something about hearing Dennis say “Mackfield residence” that just makes her melt Who does the vacuuming?Aoi, partly because she loves listening to music while she does and singing and dancing along the way~Who does the groceries? Team effort! Planning meals is a lot esier when they do the shopping together~Who takes the longest to shower? Aoi, because she keeps stopping to daydream and spends more time with her hair XDWho spends the most time in the bathroom? Still Aoi. She tends to spend a fair amount of time just tying her hair up into the usual pigtails, but that’s a step cut out after she gets pregnant.

Miscellaneous:

Is money a problem? Not really?How many cars do they own? Just one~ Aoi has no problems walking places, but with a family and pets a car was just a wise investment.Do they own their home or do they rent? Start out renting, likely eventually own~Do they live near the coast or deep in the countryside? In the city~ It’s kindda close to the coast, but not close enough, for sure.Do they live in the city or in the country? City~Do they enjoy their surroundings? Definitely! Aoi’s surprised with how much she loves living in Heartland~What’s their song? Magic - Colbie CaillatWhat do they do when they’re away from each other? Dennis has his magic tricks and dueling, among friends and kids to teach and companions in his performages, while Aoi has her sewing work and family in Yuya and Yugo and their friends to keep them distracted. The more days/longer they’re apart, though, the more they feel it - Spacing out, looking for ways to get in touch with each other, thinking about going home… Aoi’s even prone to completely zoning out to the point even Yuya could drop a hip hippo on her and she’d not notice for several minutes.Where did they first meet? Er… Maiami City?How did they first meet? Aoi was recruited to help out with keeping people hydrated on an overly hot day - And among those people was Dennis, taking a break from the heat. Handing him a sandwich led to a flower… And from a flower to a friendship~Who spends the most money when out shopping? Aoi; she has a habit of spacing out prices on things and not paying attention to how much she’s spending until after the fact. Thankfully it doesn’t happen often and rarely, if ever, does she go too overboard (and never to the point it’d put them in financial trouble), but she never fails t feel absolutely horrible about it afterwards.Who finds it amusing when the other trips over? There’s a few chuckles, but they’re restricted to falls that don’t cause any hurts. Otherwise, there’s just a cheery smile and a reach to help the other up~Any mental issues? There’s a bit of PTSD-Who’s terrified of bugs? Aoi. NO CREEPY CRAWLIES THANKS-Who kills the spiders around the house? Dennis, because Aoi’s up on that table over there-Their favourite place? Aoi would argue anywhere where they can be together, but there’s a particular place they go for stargazing that might just be it-Who pays the bills? Team effort~ Do they have any fears for their future? Aoi still fears Academia, and worries about peace falling through because of them. They both worry about how things’ll work out sometimes, and both fuss over their kids. All it takes is one person looking at their kids (or them) like Academia did for them to worry.Who’s more likely to surprise the other with a fancy dinner? They both do, though slightly more Dennis~Who uses up all of the hot water? Aoi occasionally (rarely) does fussing over her hair~Who’s the tallest? Dennis, by a full head~Who’s more likely to just randomly hop into the shower with the other? Both guilty~ It’s sometimes for the sake of getting in and out as fast as possible on days they need to rush, but mostly just because they can XDWho wanders around in their underwear? On a hot day, more than likely gonna find Aoi doing it-Who sings the loudest when singing along to the radio? Aoi~!What do they tease each other about? Everything. XD Dennis loves getting her blushing and flustered and thinks it’s cute when she is, and Aoi loves to tease him over just about anything~Who is more likely to cringe at the other’s fashion sense at times? Hands down Dennis. XD While he’s not always a fashion icon himself, Aoi’s style is definitely not always the best and she knows his flinches are a “Please no” XDDo they have mutual friends? They do! Nearly all their friends are mutual ones- The only ones that aren’t, really, are Yuri (Aoi hates him, Dennis is his friend), Yugo (Doesn’t exactly like Dennis), Yuto (not fond of Fusion natives in the first place), and Shun (would probably still rather outright deck Dennis).Who crushed first? More than likely Aoi~Any alcohol or substance related problems? Nope~Who is more likely to stumble home, drunk, at 3am? Neither-Who swears the most? Neither one of them really swears often in the least? Perhaps slightly more Dennis?

Will I be lucky enough to save “Lucky”? …. but these are the facts.

🍀"Lucky" a boxer mix dog that I became familiar with in August 2016 … & his owner (who should be his best friend) Tom.

When I first saw then it was a chilly Sunday night …

Sunday: The night I saw him we were on the way to have dinner so James ordered them a double cheeseburger with fries, an extra patty & a tea. We drove around for almost 2 hours looking for them. For many nights after I met this dog & his owner Tom - I cried and sobbed and tried to think of 1000 things that I could do for them.

They were homeless.

Monday & Tuesday: I looked around for them. I didn’t know if they were passing through town or here to stay. I cried and sobbed when telling family members how I felt. Like a disgusting snotty, hard to breath cry. So I knew I had to do something, or atleast that’s what God told me. I never saw them until …..

Wednesday: My heart was happy and I immediately knew they were not passing through & here to stay. I pulled over to tell him my family drove around for hours looking for him & that I’ve been praying for him. That’s when he told me his dogs name was Lucky.

Thursday: So I packed up a bunch of stuff & I went with my gut and gathered them things I knew they could is like: plastic bags, instant oatmeal & grits packets, bottled water, toothbrush, toothpaste, deodorant, Benadryl, small plastic reusable bowls, men’s grooming supplies & so much more.

Friday: I gave him all the stuff I had. He was so appreciative which made it worth it. I know, I know - I’ve heard everything from don’t give & do give to the homeless but I did what I felt was best. He never smells like alcohol or smoke, his pupils are normal and never seemed fidgety. We had a good talk. I understood his story a little bit but as many of you know me - I do my own research.

From then until last Monday (1/30) I would occassionally see them and ask him if he needed anything … many times he would say no & rave about how he was just given this and that. So I know he & Lucky were being looked out by the community. ❤️

Well, for the past 7 days my heart has ached over a dog whom many, quite possibly the entire community know more of now as “Tom & Lucky”.

Lucky was hit by a car Monday (1/30) & fortunately made it to the vet for treatment and care. I have been I touch with Tom about Lucky since then.

It has been made clear to me that Tom is nothing without Lucky. I understand, a mans best friend. But this is not necessarily the case.

I, along with a powerful & determined group of ladies have been in touch with Tom as a group this week taking care of Lucky & trying to help him get his life back. We have went down every avenue to help this man. He promises me every day that he is clean. He also tells me that he wants off the street and is looking for work. This is all great news!!! We understand life brings unforeseen circumstances but we are here to help without any judgement. We do not want to take Lucky away and throw Tom away. We want to help him & that we did!!!

Well - with our determination we have managed to accomplish all those things. We have found him a job, home and even available foster for Lucky until Tom gets on his feet. (with a legal contract of course) Then Lucky can heal up nicely from his accident. Let me say this again, A JOB, HOUSING & FOSTERING FOR LUCKY ALL FREE UNTIL HE GETS ON HIS FEET! I’ve informed Tom of ALL of these things. All he is worried about is getting Lucky to sit with him on the rock.

Shall I even inform you that it’s the same rock he has already received a city ordinance ticket from.

This has now brought us to “the know” - that Tom refuses it all. ☹️He would rather be on the streets and make Lucky stay out in the cold/heat. I am beyond disgusted.

I have been attacked through social media by being a voice for a dog who doesn’t have one. I’m not the slightest bit bothered or upset about it. In the words of DMX, “Meet Me Outside” (outside the device your typing behind).

First & foremost … majority of the attackers who are hiding behind their smart phones & computers have no idea …. 1. Who I am 2. My relationship with Tom & Lucky 3. What I have invested for this man & his so called “boy” aka: the dog who has no choice or voice.

I know now Tom doesn’t want to get on his feet. He wouldn’t even stay in his hotel the night that it was 20° outside that was paid for. He would rather live on the streets but for him to do this to Lucky is sickening.

He has said that somebody offered him $1500 for Lucky and he wouldn’t take it. I don’t know if I believe that.

I don’t think there’s enough money to buy Lucky because Lucky is Tom’s absolute meal ticket for any sympathy, any money, any food, and he has people bring him stuff out of the woodwork’s all the time. Tom thinks he is a celebrity now and the expense of Lucky getting hit. It’s a truly sad situation.

3 weeks ago when the snow came through - Tom lost Lucky and let him run off without even looking for him. Lucky was found by 2 ladies & Tom was nowhere in sight!!! He made no effort to find Lucky, he was eventually found sitting cozy in his hotel room watching TV. 😡

He doesn’t want help. He wants people to feel sorry for him, give him things, give him money & buy him hotel nights & God knows whatever else. Everything always gets “stolen” … he uses Lucky as a lure for the compassionate people. Period.

This past Wednesday after the community came together to help pay for Lucky’s veterinary care … Tom picked Lucky up from the vet & dragged him up & down East Innes Street when he knew Lucky needed to stay still and rest. So, we checked Tom into a hotel Thursday night & gave him money for the hotel Friday night. (I know - I know, don’t even say it …)

It was only a matter of time before we saw the truth come out. We gave it to him so he could check in as early as 2pm that afternoon. Well, he was out walking the streets that night(Thursday) & at midnight (20degrees outside) when he should have been in his hotel with Lucky, he was “visiting” over at O'Charleys. Keep in mind this hotel stay had already been paid for with a portion of money that the community donated.

The money we gave him for his Friday night hotel was gone … it was gone Friday morning. I knew that when I picked up Lucky and took him back to the vet Friday morning. Tom can not take care of Lucky and I know that. Tom knows I know that. That’s why he trusts me to take him.

There’s no telling where that money went. That money is gone and he is saying whatever to get more money.

Community, Definitely do what you want - No need to look below the surface and actually get involved and invested. We’ve already did that & Tom is on his pedestal. Give what you want if it helps you sleep at night, so be it. Is that all you want is a “feel good moment” and nothing more?? Just think about that poor dog who has no say so then call me about it. I’d be more than happy to speak face to face or on the phone. Messaging me your opinion is for cowards. When you lay down at night - please think about Lucky in the cold / heat while his “Dad” refused a better life for both of them.

FYI - I’m the one who picked Lucky up Friday and took him back to the vet to get checked out then I made the decision to board him. Thomas had no desire to go with Lucky to the vet. He didn’t care about his “boy” NONE whatsoever!!! He said he was going back to the hotel room til 1pm which was check out & then to peddle for more money because the money he had was gone. (That’s the $70 … gone) He can go to the homeless shelter but won’t. Lucky needs to rest and that’s why I boarded him. Thomas trusts me with Lucky. This morning, Tuesday (2/7) Tom picked Lucky up from the vet. Last night I asked Tom to live Lucky there til he is better & he told me everybody missed him. “Everybody” as in the people who have made Tom think & appear as though he is the greatest dog Dad ever. 🙄

Per the Unofficial Salisbury Outreach Facebook page - Lucky is still limping. Imagine that. I’m sure Tom is so happy to see Lucky because Lucky is his free ride. It’s sad, sickening and downright disgusting that Lucky is living like this.

It’s clear & apparent that Tom doesn’t want help. He wants people to feel sorry for him, give him things, give him money & buy him hotel nights & God knows whatever else. Everything always gets “stolen” … he uses Lucky as a lure for the compassionate people. Period.

I dont know if I will be lucky enough to save “Lucky” … but I’m trying little buddy. Miss Jill is trying. 🐶🍀❤️