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narcissistcookbook · 7 days

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in line with the trends, i'm going to release a bad two hour album that could have been a passable 35 minute album

#no tags

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catgirl-sub · 2 months

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is that a steam deck in your pants or are you just excited to see me?

#no tags

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dilf-odo · 21 days

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do you think Julian and Martok explored eachothers bodies while in the dominion prison

#no tags #if you see this you see it #my dumb jokes

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disabledpirate · 3 months

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Lucius has every right to hate Ed and I’m tired of pretending like he doesn’t! I support him!

#no tags #do not start shit on here

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fuckitwebhaal · 5 months

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hi as a rule I don’t like e-begging but I have to take my cat to the emergency vet 👍 he’s lethargic and has blood in his urine and I just need some extra support to get him there bc this is the second time I’ve had to take him this month . my ko-fi is linked or if you want my PayPal I can give it.

#no tags #this is embarrassing #sorry.

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lovelybunn · 2 years

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Hi! Could I request Post covid Kyle Broflovski x fem!reader nsfw headcanons please? Tysm!

nsfw hcs w/ post covid kyle broflovski.

warning(s): sexual themes, uses of petnames, afab!reader

author's note: my brain instantly thought of this when i saw this request (also if you know me and/or follow me, if you saw this post, no you didn't.)

His kinks.

giving praise.

"you're doing so good, baby." making you feel good is kyle's number one goal, both mentally and physically, so verbal praise is a go-to. he just adores that cute little look on your face when he tells you how gorgeous you are while he teases at your most sensitive areas.

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being called "sir".

you might have accidentally or purposefully called him sir at some point, and ever since then, it really turns him on. the way the word just slides off your tongue hits him in the right way. especially when you mewl it out, begging for him to touch you.

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overstimulation.

not only will this man either have his tongue, fingers, or cock plummeting deep inside you, he will almost always have some kind of toy to further push you over the edge. but don't worry, kyle will always let you cum; he isn't cruel.

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marking.

he doesn't ever bite too hard, he doesn't want to hurt you. but don't get it twisted, he sucks hard enough where that hickey will be visible, and he makes sure of that. his favorite places to mark you, (besides your neck of course,) is your waist and everything in-between all the way down to your thighs. there's something so addictive to their tenderness and the way you squirm around him with each gentle touch.

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phone sex.

hear me out. him being able to hear your sweet moans while he's at work is pure heaven for him. he loves encouraging you, edging you on, until you finally hit your high, and trust me, that won't be the last one of the day. ;)

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What petnames does he give you?

baby.

"you're my pretty baby, aren't you? say it." to put it simply, your his baby, so of course he's gonna call you that. he wants you to feel loved, for you to know that you mean the world to him.

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sweetie/sweetheart.

"oh, you can't handle it, sweetheart? i don't care." he's says this more in a sarcastic tone, but he always means well. he uses this especially during angry sex, which, because of kyle's proneness to losing his temper very easily, is common.

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Ass, Thighs, or Tits?

ass.

kyle broflovski, believe it or not, likes ass a whole lot. and he just loves groping and smacking on yours. wear some cute jeans that hug you just right? he'd totally tap that. wear a skirt that's just so short it's virtually impossible to cover your ass up? expect to not be able to walk tomorrow.

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How vocal is he?

hmm, not very.

he usually just hums against your ear. but sometimes, when kyle's really close, he'll whimper and tiny squeaks of moans will come out, but other than that, he'd prefer to be able to hear you instead.

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Head, both giving and receiving.

giving.

when i tell you this man knows exactly what he's doing, i'm being very serious. not only does that tongue work wonders, those delivish eyes could make you cum all their own. like i said earlier, he loves to pleasure you, so he goes down on you pretty often.

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receiving.

"that's it, just like that, baby.." though he does prefer to give it to you, he's more than down for you to wrap your pretty little lips around his cock. (he's a man, what were you expecting?) fair warning, prepare for kyle broflovski's true jersey shore to come out when you give him head.

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His favorite position(s).

missionary.

kyle is a very peculiar man. any place where he can see your face he would be satisfied with. he'll place you where your legs rest comfortably at his shoulders as he looks down endearingly at you.

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doggystyle.

ass is his thing, so being able to see all that jiggling in his face while he pounds into to you is heaven in his eyes. just being to squeeze your plump cheeks is enough to drive kyle crazy.

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Aftercare: Does he do it?

yes, of course he does.

kyle can't stand being all sweaty and gross after having sex with you, so he almost always will invite you to go take a nice, calming shower with him to slowly come down from your high. but he never stops praising you for how amazing you did (even if you didn't do much of anything). soft, gentle kisses and tender massages against your tight muscles are something kyle will do every time. and the cuddly nap you two will have afterward? spooning kyle broflovski? im jealous.

#south park #south park post covid #kyle broflovski #kyle broflovski x reader #south park hcs #i literally dont know #i hope no one reads this #theres like #no tags #for this #south park x reader #south park headcanons

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p3skyb1rdsheets · 6 months

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“..Okay this might sound.. weird, but do you have any regrets? I mean like— have you done or said something you wish you never said?” — He asked, fidgeting his hands almost inpatient, not knowing the why but wanting to know.

“Why- where does that question come from?” Grian asked, tilting his head to a side, it was a genuine question.

“Oh you know.. curiosity." He said back, it was a quick answer— to be honest. “So, do you have any regrets?”

“..Just one.” Grian's gaze fixed in the sky, the low wind flowing through his body messing with his hair.

“Which?” He also looked up at the sky, as the campfire warmness kept them both there.. warm.

“Loving you.” Grian said, his gaze fixing down in Scar once more. Almost looking hurt. “Because you aren't here anymore.”

“Oh, Grian.. You have to learn to let go.” Scar said, smiling. “It’s hard, yes. But you have to.”

“But what If I can’t?”

“You will. Believe me.”

[some random sheet that came through my mind <3]

#no tags #scarian #angst #hehe :3

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ellayain · 1 month

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I’m currently binge watching “My happy marriage.” And I can’t help but think maybe..? Ayato Kamisato from Genshin Impact x reader? Is that a good enough idea?

(NGL KIYOKA KINDA LOOKS LIKE AYATO…)

#kamisato ayato #ayato genshin impact #my happy marriage #ayato kamisato x reader #ayato kamisato x you #small idea #genshin impact #drabble #(your tags here)#tags #no tags #idk what tags to use #idk how tags work

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smashlovesscream · 2 months

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There's no way Stu and Billy DIDN'T quote Candyman as they made out, LIKE GUYS. YOU DO NOT GET THIS.

LIEK LOOK "With... with my uh..." Stu stumbles over his words as he walks Billy into his door. "my...hook for a hand," Stu creates a fist, sticking his index finger out, and dragging it down to the bottom of Billy's stomach. He pushes his knuckle into Billy. "I'll split you from your groin.." As Stu moved up he grinds his knuckle into Billy's body. "...to your gullet." He stops at Billy's jaw, his fist breaks and he holds his neck gently. "I came for you."

THE CANDY MAN IS A ROMANTIC.

"Be my victim. Be my victim."

"The pain, I can assure you, will be exquisite. As for our deaths, there is nothing to fear. Our names will be written on a thousand walls. Our crimes told and retold by our faithful believers. We shall die together in front of their very eyes and give them something to be haunted by. Come with me and be immortal."

"Why do you want to live? If you had learned just a little from me, you would not beg to live. I am rumor. It is a blessed condition, believe me. To be whispered about at street corners. To live in other people's dreams, but not to have to be. Do you understand?"

"What do the good know except what the bad teach them by their excesses?" "Murderer." "Allow me at least a kiss. Just one exquisite kiss."

#no tags #fuck it #IM TIRED.

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ireallyymissu · 2 months

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honestly, if you are going to be in my dms telling me how pretty i am and talking to me all day everyday then GHOST ME or like make me feel bad about being depressed.

fuck my wasted time right?

#no tags #hurt #i’m a fucking person too?#don’t use me like that.

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theredshift · 2 months

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