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camille-lachenille · 1 year

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Elvish names

A list of names of our world translated in Quenya and Sindarin you can use for your fanfics, just credit me if you pick one.

I tried to stay as close as possible to the original etymology of the names but there are sometimes several meaning possible for a component and, the lexicon in both Quenya and Sindarin being relatively restricted, I often had to compromise with the closest synonym I could find or play with the figurative meanings. I always tried to keep the main idea/element of a name, and that’s why I give so many options for some translations. I also tied not to use any fan creation/neo-Sindarin to be as close as possible to the original lore but there are two instances where I hadn’t much alternative so, be sure to read the notes for Chloe and the Latin etymology of Rosamund if you want to use the languages strictly as Tolkien wrote them.

The names are all given with the feminine, the masculine and the neutral form. The first in the list (until Rosamund) are completely gender neutral in their translation and it’s up to you to decide if it sound more masculine, feminine or neutral. All the other names can be declined using various gendered suffixes or words at the end. Every element will be given in English each time but here is a list of the most common suffixes so you can play around with the names by yourself.

Quenya:

Neutral: -wë = suffix for names; quén = person, individual, being; hína = child

Feminine: -iel = feminine suffix, daughter; -ien = daughter; -wen = maiden

Masculine: -ndo = masculine suffix; -ion = son

Sindarin:

Neutral: -u = suffix for names; pen = someone, one, individual; hên = child

Feminine: -iel = feminine suffix, daughter; -il = feminine suffix; -wen = maiden, woman

Masculine: -on = masculine suffix; -ion = son

Adelaide/Alice

(Noble heather/moors) =>

Quenya: Araoricon (ara- =noble & oricon=heather)

Sindarin: Artalath (ar- =noble, talath=flat lands, plain)

Bernard

(Brave/hardy bear) =>

Quenya: Turcamorco (turca=strong, powerful in body & morco=bear), atl. spelling Turkamorco (turka instead of turca)

Sindarin: Bellgraw (bell=strong in body & graw=bear), Bellmdelin (medlin=honey-eater, bear-like)

Dorothy/ Theodora/Theodore

(Gift of God) =>

Quenya: Valanna (vala=god & anna=gift) Valanwa (anwa=gift)

Sindarin: Balanoneth (balan=god & oneth=giving), Rodononeth (rodon=god)

I think that, for this name, it would work to replace the generic “vala” by the name of a specific Vala if the parents prayed one to have a child. Ex. Ivononeth (Ivon= Yavanna in Sindarin) or Vánanna (Gift of Vána). Also works with “Eru” instead of the generic words for “god”

Elizabeth

(My God is an oath) =>

Quenya: Ainovanda (aino, god & vanda=oath/pledge), Valavanda (vala=god), Eruvanda (I'm not sure any Elf would put the name Eru, the equivalent of God with a capital g, in their child's name but it's the closest in meaning to Elizabeth)

Sindarin: Balangwaedh (balan=vala & gwaedh=oath), Rodongwaedh (rodon=vala), Erugwaedh

Louis/Louise

(Loud/famous battle/to fight) =>

Quenya: Rimpaotha (rimpa=loud & otha=war)

Sindarin: Bruidagor (brui=loud & dagor=battle), Bruidagra (dagra=battle)

I strongly doubt any sane Elven parent would call their child like that, but it sounds relatively plausible for a baby born during a time of war (maybe a baby born during the crazy First Age?).

Maud/Mathilda

(Mighty battle) =>

Quenya: Melehtaothawen (melehta=mighty & otha=war & -wen=maiden)

For this one, I used three elements to compose the name because it didn’t sound right otherwise, but it’s not entirely right according to the naming rules in Quenya.

Sindarin: Belaithdagra (belaith=mighty & dagra=battle)

Like the precedent name, I doubt it would be very common, but it might work as an epessë (chosen name/nickname) for a warrior

Myriam

(Sea drop) =>

Quenya: Limbairë (limba=drop & airë= sea), Limbairen(airen=sea)

Sindarin: Limigaear (limig=drop & gaear=sea), Limigaer (gaer=sea)

Nicholas/Nicole

(Victory of the people) =>

Quenya: Aparielië (apairë=victory & lië=people, folk), Túrelië (túrë=mastery, victory)

Sindarin: Tûrgwaith (tûr= mastery & gwaith=people)

Robert

(Bright fame) =>

Quenya: Alcarima (alcar=glory & -ima=fair)

Sindarin: Agarbain (agar=glory & bain=fair), Agargalad (galad=radiant, bright)

Rosamund

(Horse protector (Germanic) OR rose of the world (Latin)) =>

Germanic etymology:

Quenya: Roccovarilë (rocco=horse & varilë=protection)

Sindarin: Rochthand (roch=horse thand=shield)

Latin etymology:

Quenya: Eälótë (lótë=flower, blossom & eä=world) Eämerillë (merillë=rose (fan invention)), Ilúvelótë (ilúvë=world)

Sindarin: Merilamar (meril=rose & amar=world)

Albert/Alberta

(Noble illustrious/brilliant) =>

Quenya: Aralcarindo (ara-=noble & alcarin= glorious, brilliant & -ndo=masculine suffix), Aralcarinon (-on=masculine suffix)

Sindarin: Araglorion (ar-=noble & aglor=glorious, brilliant & -ion=masculine suffix, son)

Feminine form:

Q. Aralcariniel (-iel=feminine suffix)

S. Aragloril (-il=feminine suffix)

Neutral form:

Q. Aralcarinwë (-wë=neutral suffix)

S. Aragloru (-u=neutral suffix)

Alexander/Alexandra

(Protector of men/defending men) =>

Quenya: Alatyanér (alatya- =to ward off, to protect & nér=man), Sandanér (sanda=shield)

Sindarin: Beriadir (beria=to protect & dîr=man), Thandir (thand=shield)

Feminine form:

Q. Alatyanis (nís=woman), Sandanis

S. Beriawen (-wen=woman, maiden), Thandwen (this one can also be used as a title/warrior category as it literally means Shieldmaiden)

Neutral form:

Q. Alatyawë (-wë=neutral suffix), Sandawë

S. Beriau (-u=neutral suffix), Thandu

Arthur

(Bear son/king/warrior) =>

Quenya: Morcotar (morco=bear & -tar=king), Morcomehtar (mehta=warrior), Morcoion (-ion=son)

Sindarin: Grawaran (graw=bear & aran=king), Medlinaran, (medlin=honey-eater, bear-like), Grawhador (hador=warrior), Grawion (-ion=son), Medlinion

Feminine form:

Q. Morcotári (tári=queen), Morcoien (-ien=daughter)

S. Grawrían (rían=queen), Medlinrían, Grawiel (-iel=daughter), Medliniel

Neutral form:

Q. Morcoquén (quén=person, individual), Morcohína (hên=child)

S. Grawpen (pen=one, somebody), Medlinpen, Grawhên (hên=child), Medlinhên

Charlotte/Charles

(Free woman) =>

Quenya: Fairenissë (fairë=free & nissë=woman), Fairënína (nína=woman), Fairewen (-wen=maiden), Fairënis (nís=woman)

Sindarin: Lainbess (lain=free & bess=woman), Laingwen (gwen=maiden, woman), Lainil (-il=feminine suffix)

Masculine form:

Q. Fairënér (nér=man)

S. Laindir (dîr=man), Lainon (-on=masculine suffix)

Neutral form:

Q. Fairëquén (quén=person, individual), Fairewë (-wë=neutral suffixe)

S. Lainpen (pen=one, somebody), Lainu (-u=neutral suffix)

Chloe

(Blooming, fertility, spring) =>

Quenya: Löawen (löa= time of blooming, “spring” & -wen= maiden), Lótëaiel (lótëa=blooming, flowering & -iel= feminine suffix)

Sindarin: Ethuiliel (ethuil=spring & -iel= feminine suffix) Lostadil (lostad=blooming & -il= feminine suffix)

Note that lostad is a fan invention/non-approved by Tolkien so this is not the name for you if you are trying to stick as closely as possible to the language rules.

Masculine form:

Q. Löando (-ndo=masculine suffix), Lótëando

S. Ethuilon (-on=masculine suffix)

Neutral Form:

Q. Loawë (-wë=neutral suffix), Lóteawë

S. Ethuilu (-u=neutral suffix)

Edward/Edmund

(Wealth/fortune/prosperous, guardian/protector/lord) =>

Quenya: Almacundo (alma= good fortune, weal, wealth & cundo=guardian, lord)

Sindarin: Maelighir (maelig= wealth, abundance & hîr=lord)

Feminine form:

Q. Almaheri (heri=lady)

S. Maeligrodel (rodel=lady, high lady)

Neutral form:

Q. Almaquén (quén=person, individual), Almawë (-wë= suffix for a person)

S. Maeligpen (pen=one, somebody), Maeligu (-u=neutral suffix)

Eloise

(Healthy) =>

Quenya: Alwarien (alwa=healthy & -ien= daughter, maiden)

Sindarin: Alwiel (alw=healthy & -iel=feminine suffix)

Masculine form:

Q. Alwando (-ndo=masculine suffix)

S. Alwon (-on=masculine suffix)

Neutral form:

Q. Alwawë (-wë=neutral suffix)

S. Alwu (-u=neutral suffix)

Frederic

(Peace ruler) =>

Quenya: Rainëtur (rainë=peace & -tur=ruler), Rainëtar (-tar=king)

Sindarin: Idharan (îdh=peace & aran=king, noble, lord)

Feminine form:

Q. Rainëtári (tári=queen)

S. Idhrían (rían=queen)

George/Georgina

(Farmer, lit. soil-worker) =>

Quenya: Ceminér (cemi=soil & -nér=man), Kemenér (kemen=earth), Rernér (rer-=to sow)

Sindarin: Caedir (cae=soil & dîr=man), Cevendir (ceven=earth)

Feminine form:

Q. Ceminís (nís=woman), Kemenís, Ceminissë (nissë=woman)

S. Caewen (-wen=maiden, woman), Cevenil (-il=feminine suffix)

Neutral form:

Q. Cemimólë (mólë=work, labour), Kemenmólë

S. Caedrabu (drab-= to work, to labour & -u=neutral suffix), Cevendrabu

Helen

(Sunshine) =>

Quenya: Arien (canon name for the Sun, lit. sun-maiden), Anarcalina (anar=sun & calina=bright), Ancalë (name of a Tengwar letter, litt. radiant one)

Sindarin: Anorwen (anor=sun & -wen=maiden), Anorglân (glân=bright, shining), Glawiel (glaw=sunshine & -iel=feminine suffix)

Masculine form:

Q. Anarion (lit. son of the sun; name of the youngest son of Elendil and second king of Gondor)

S. Anordir (dîr=man), Anoron (-on=masculine suffix), Glawion (-ion=son)

Neutral form:

Q. Anarwë (-wë=neutral suffix), Anarhína (hína=child)

S. Anoru (-u=neutral suffix), Anorhên (hên=child)

Lucy/Luke

(Light) =>

Quenya: Calaiel (cala=light & -iel=feminine suffix), Calaien (-ien=daughter, maiden), Calinaiel (calina= light), Calinawen (-wen=woman, maiden), Calina

Sindarin: Caladiel (calad= light & -iel=feminine suffix), Galadil (galad=light, radiance)

Masculine form:

Q. Calando (-ndo =masculine suffix), Calinando, Calaion (-ion=son), Calinaion

S. Caladon (-on=masculine suffix), Galadon, Caladion (-ion=son), Galadion

Neutral form:

Q. Calawë (-wë=neutral suffix), Calinawë

S. Caladu (-u=neutral suffix), Galadu

Mary

(Beloved) =>

Quenya: Meldawen (melda=beloved & -wen=maiden)

Sindarin: Melliel (mell=beloved & -iel=feminine suffix, daughter), Mellwen (-wen=maiden, woman)

Masculine form:

Q. Meldando (-ndo=masculine suffix)

S. Meldir (dîr=man)

Neutral form:

Q. Meldawë (-wë=neutral suffix)

S. Mellu (-u=neutral suffix)

Melissa

(Bee) =>

Quenya: Nioniel (nion=bee & -iel=feminine suffix)

Sindarin: Glitânil (glî=honey & tân=maker & -il=feminine suffix, daughter)

There is no word for bee in Sindarin so I smashed together honey and maker and it’ll do the job.

Masculine form:

Q. Niondo (-ndo=masculine suffix)

S. Glitânon (-on=masculine suffix)

Neutral form:

Q. Nionwë (-wë=neutral suffix)

S. Glitânu (-u=neutral suffix)

Sarah

(Ruler/princess) =>

Quenya: Aranel (aranel=princess)

Sindarin: Brethil(brethil= princess, litt. queen-daughter), Riel (riel=princess)

Susan

(Lily, flower) =>

Quenya: Indiliel (indil=lily, flower & -iel=feminine suffix)

Sindarin: Ellothiel (elloth=flower & -iel=feminine suffix), Lothiel (loth=flower)

Neutral form:

Q. Indilwë (-wë=neutral suffix)

S. Ellothu (-u=neutral suffix), Lothu

Ursula

(Bear) =>

Quenya: Morcowen (morco=bear & -wen=maiden)

Sindarin: Grawil (graw=bear & -il=feminine suffix) Medlinil (medlin=honey-eater, bear-like)

Masculine form:

Q. Morcondo (-ndo=masculine suffix)

S. Grawon (-on=masculine suffix)

Neutral form:

Q. Morcowë (-wë=neutral suffix)

S. Grawu (-u=neutral suffix), Medlinu

So here is the complete list. As I said at the beginning, you are welcome to pick a name or two for your fanfictions, but CREDIT ME if you do so. I spent hours and hours on this list and I won’t have my hard work stolen. And I’d like to see who these names will become as characters, too. You can either put a link to this post or tag me. I am Camille_LaChenille on AO3.

If you made it this far, congratulations! I also take requests to make Elvish names. Send in my askbox a message with one or two real world name or a general idea of the meaning you'd like, and a brief descrition of your character (gender, origin, social role/status, ) as well as the language you'd like the name in. I will give you two options you can chose from in a week or so. For an Elf who had to change their name from one language to another (think First Age Quenya ban), precise it and I'll give one name in each language.

#tolkien #lotr elves #tolkien elves #elvish #elvish names #quenya #sindarin #names #writing resources #the silmarillion #the lord of the rings #writing resource for Tolkien fanfictions #lord of the rings #fanfiction research #long post

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nicsalazar · 4 months

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What baking can do || Andy, Leah & Nicole

TIMING: Two weeks ago. LOCATION: Ramirez Residence PARTIES: @declinlalune @phoenixleah & @nicsalazar SUMMARY: Leah plans a Christmas baking sale to help with Fully Booked's restoration. Andy and Nicole are there to help WARNINGS: None.

It was gone. Everything. Everything Leah had ever worked for had just… vanished in one night, and technically by her own hand, too. Well, not everything was gone. The building was still standing, and their apartment, sure. But the books, her inventory, after years and years of being built upon… it was gone. It took her a week after the fire just to get out of bed before noon, and even longer to start coming up with a plan to get Fully Booked full of books again. She and Nicole, of course, still had Nicole’s income, and the money they’d been putting away for years (not many people in Wicked’s Rest didn’t have a just in case fund stashed away somewhere), but if she ever wanted to open the store again, they needed inventory, and they couldn’t cut into Nicole’s salary for that.

She couldn’t remember which of them had come up with the idea, but as soon as it was out in the open, she didn’t know why they didn’t think of it sooner. It would probably take a lot of fundraisers before they’d be able to open again, but people were going to be willing to donate, right? Fully Booked had been a staple of the community for years. A winter holiday baked goods fundraiser had to be an enticing enough first fundraiser to convince people to participate (just in case, for some odd reason, the allure of literature wasn’t).

“I think she’s here”, Leah chirped from the kitchen counter where she’d been organizing ingredients all morning. There was a gentle rap on the door just before, Andy no doubt still a bit anxious after all had transpired between the three of them. But she was more than the perfect fit to help, and Leah couldn’t wait to pick her ear about the perfect measurements, or which sprinkles went the best with which frosting. Even if it didn’t raise any funds, their time together today would certainly boost Leah’s baking in the future. “Do you mind going to get it?” she asked Nicole. Nicole, sweet Nicole who had been her rock through this all (even so far as helping her cover up her slight arson- would she have been able to pull off the controlled burn if her girlfriend hadn’t been a firefighter? “I have to admit I’m sort of… excited? If you can believe that.”

To almost everybody else, Leah had put on a brave face after Fully Booked burned down. She had remained optimistic in the face of adversity, talking about getting back to work to quickly ensure the bookshop was up and running in no time. To the outside world, it looked like this accident had ignited a fighting spirit within Leah. It was true, to an extent. The determination was there, keeping Leah’s spirit intact underneath her pain. But very few were privy to what the loss of her dream had done to the woman Nicole loved. In the few weeks that had passed since the incident, she found herself repaying a lot of that patience Leah had shown her at the beginning of their relationship. It wasn’t a debt Leah would’ve kept score of, of course, but Nicole knew. She always remembered. She’d carried the guilt of her shortcomings for years. So, as the tables turned, she stepped up. It had proven how solid the relationship had become. If only the circumstances that led to that realization had been different…

Nicole watched, leaning against the door frame, a fond smile etched on her lips. She knew better than to try to help with Leah’s organization. Her efforts were better spent encouraging her from a distance. So that’s what she did, only intervening if her girlfriend asked for it. It was a good system. Because there was something about the spark in Leah’s eyes that hadn’t been there in the past weeks. Nicole herself was uplifted by it, her heart lighter than it had been since the decision was made to burn it all down in order to preserve the scribe journals. Her girlfriend moved around the kitchen with more energy than she had in weeks, and Nicole stood there sinking into that pool of warmth and affection she had for her.

There was a knock on the door, and before either of them could speak, she heard Nacho’s sloppy footsteps rushing to the entrance. Nicole could’ve sworn Jane’s scent drifted into the room too, signaling she was on the move. Well, that was new. Apparently, everyone was excited to see Andy. “I can see that. Looks good on you,” she breathed out as her attention went back to Leah, nothing short of relieved. “Got it, yeah” Nicole nodded, flashing her a soft smile before walking over to welcome their visit. “Right on time” she muttered, as Andy appeared behind the door. She hesitated for a second, unsure whether to offer a handshake or a hug, or— a pat on the back? Until she settled for… stepping aside to let the woman in. They were still working on that, it was fine. It didn’t look like Andy noticed. “Be prepared, she’s… pretty fucking excited” and some of that joy was evident in Nicole’s own tone too. “Thanks, for doing this Andy”.

It was an odd thing, settling between the horrors of what happened in the cabin with that ranger, to finding Nicole in the woods, and now this. Now this, where Leah’s life’s work had been brought to its knees by something as stupid as book wyrms. Andy had done some research after being told what had happened, but she still couldn’t quite understand why it happened, and why it had to happen to her friend.

Hadn’t they gone through enough at this point? Andy wanted to scream at the sky, to something she didn’t believe in, to beg for something kind to befall them instead of tragic. She hated the way this all continued on, hated the way that she couldn’t be sure that her friends would be safe, even with something as simple as something non-hunter related. She hated this town and what it kept taking from the people she cared about, but did her feelings matter here? Not so much, no.

So when Nicole and Leah asked if she would help with a fundraiser, Andy jumped at the chance to help. To give her friends something to look forward to, to give them hope. She pulled in front of the building, frown twisting as she noticed the closed signs on the front door of the shop. It made her chest ache, knowing just how much Leah cared about the place to begin with. But she tried to give in to the lightheartedness of their interaction now, to give to them what they’d given to her time and time again.

The door opened not long after she knocked and she smiled as Nicole appeared in her view. She looked a little tired, but better than the last time she’d seen her. That was good. “You don’t need to thank me, I’m more than happy to help out.” That much was true, especially considering it’d been awhile since she’d last gotten into a kitchen to bake her heart out. “She’s excited? Really? That makes two of us.” Andy flashed Nicole a smile before kicking her boots off to the side. She leaned down to scratch Nacho behind the ears before following Nicole back into the kitchen. “You’ve got quite the spread going on here, Leah.” She grinned at her friend before padding further inside, looking at all the ingredients that the phoenix had laid out. “Damn, I think you might be more of a professional than me.” Andy went to the kitchen sink and washed her hands before patting them dry on a paper towel. “Tell me where you need me, boss.”

Leah could hear the faint sounds of greetings from the front of the apartment, and it brought another grin to her face. They should have thought of this earlier. Maybe this was the start of something better- maybe their wave of bad luck shit sandwiches was over, and all they had needed as a catalyst was some good old fashioned friend time and some baked goods. She was just finishing her last bits of organizing- a little more sprinkles in this bowl, that piping bag of frosting tilted just so, checking and rechecking that they had enough measuring cups..- when she heard Andy’s voice enter into the kitchen behind her.

She blushed with pride at Andy’s words, brushing them off with a quick toss of her hand as she went to stand by Nicole’s side. “A professional? Oh, no way. I just know the pride in an organized workspace, is all.” She said, admiring just how organized their workspace actually looked. She couldn’t help but get even more excited at the prospect of being called boss, even if by a close friend like Andy. She looked toward Nicole with a proud grin, and then back toward Andy, clapping her hands together. “Okay! So stop me if this is over ambitious, but I have more than a few ideas working for the Winter Fundraiser.” As she spoke, Leah realized she hadn’t even shared all of her ideas with Nicole, so this would be her first time hearing some of them, too. “My first idea was that we could make little cookies that look like books-super cute, right? We could even title them with all the classic names with little piping bags. But THEN that spurred on my idea to sell boxes of cupcakes, all themed after everyone’s favorite christmas classics! A Christmas Carol Cupcake? I’d take 20!” She was getting ahead of herself now, but no one could stop Leah’s idea flow once it started.

“Oh, and this next idea Nicole helped with, right, Babe? Edible Peppermint stick bookmarks! Obviously they have a shelf life, so we could even sell them with more sustainable bookmarks too, just so people feel like they’re worth it. But… totally cool. Right?! Who wouldn’t love an edible bookmark in their Christmas stocking?”

Nicole trailed behind Andy, stopping for just a second to crouch and pick up one of Nacho’s toys. She waved it at him, drawing his attention away from the kitchen. Hopefully, he’d remain entertained long enough while they got their hands dirty. He would certainly be rewarded if that was the case. She joined the pair a moment later, smiling at the ongoing conversation. Her eyebrows lifted, looking at Leah perk up after being called boss. Yeah, she was pleased with that one. Maybe even reminded her that she still was one. But… at heart, or— metaphorically, like kids said nowadays.

She nodded encouragingly as her eyes locked with Leah. She’d been scribbling in her notebook a little too much at night. An abnormal amount, if such a thing was possible for the scribe. Nicole didn’t ask why, she never questioned when Leah fell into those cryptic moods, because she knew eventually, her girlfriend would come out ready to share all of those thoughts she had been stewing on and putting on paper. It appeared the answer to the mystery was about to be revealed. Her face softened, an adoring glance on Leah when the woman started sharing her ideas, hands flying everywhere, eyes shining in excitement. It was nothing short of healing to see Leah like this again. Her own spirits were lifted by the sight.

Her gaze quickly turned to the floor, heat spreading in her cheeks at the sudden attention. She shook her head shyly, not exactly ashamed of the idea, but uncertain she deserved any sort of praise. Nicole had found it on one of those… websites. The pinning interest or something. She wasn’t sure how it worked still, but a search bar was a search bar everywhere, and some interesting results came back when she asked the right question. She liked the bookmarks, Leah liked the bookmarks, and she was as confident about the idea as someone like her could ever be about anything. Being suddenly put on the spot did make her nervous, however. Briefly. She was among people who cared about her after all.

With the ideas out in the open, Nicole moved away from the pair. “Haven’t baked in thirteen years,” she explained, anticipating a pang of grief. There was a reason why she’d lost interest in many culinary endeavors. “I’m good— I can hand you the ingredients. I’m good with that. And…stirring and kneading if that’s—” she stopped for a second, a sheepish grin on her face. “That wasn’t a cat joke” She tilted her head, flustered. But there was lightness in her chest that wasn’t there before. She was so relieved there were no secrets standing between the three anymore. “Can’t be too hard…” she shot a look at the counter, where Leah had printed a recipe. Cupcakes were entry-level, no? Cookies on the other hand, she knew they were incredibly deceptive. “Tell me where to stand and I’ll…” she trailed off, making her point evident by now.

Andy hadn’t realized it, but her smile only grew as Leah explained her plans. She was enthusiastic, and that made her feel a lot better about the situation. They could be sad about the book store, but also be proactive. It seemed like Leah wanted to take the latter approach, and Andy looked around the kitchen as Leah continued on. It was ambitious, but she didn’t figure it wasn’t anything they couldn’t do. Once she got back to work, maybe she’d see about taking a cut from her paycheck so that some of the proceeds of their sales went back to the bookstore, too. It could be a surprise for later on, or maybe a backup plan if Leah’s current plans didn’t exactly pan out. Though, it seemed like she was organized enough.

Leah’s determination rubbed off on Andy and she found herself nodding along enthusiastically with the plans that were laid out. At the mention of the edible bookmarks, Andy looked over at Nicole with a grin. “That’s actually a really good idea. If anything, it’d give the kids something to snack on and the parent something usable.” She wasn’t sure what peppermint bark tasted like, but she guessed she was about to find out.

“You’re going to have to give me a list of book names, I’m not really good with them, but otherwise I think it’s a really awesome plan.” She clasped her hands together and watched as Nicole moved towards the edge of the makeshift factory line Leah set up. With a laugh, she nodded. “Sure, but I’m going to pretend it’s a cat joke.” The constant buzz and prickle was easy to ignore now that she’d spent so much time with the two. It was like when she was with Alex. She was grateful for the normalcy in it, and in the situation at hand– even if it’d come at the price of Leah losing her bookstore.

“Okay, I’ll start on the dry mixes, then Leah, I think you should work onto the wet ones, and Nicole, you combine, you knead, you do whatever.” She looked between the two of them, smile still in place. “Does that sound like a good place to start?” Andy looked over the ingredients again before pointing towards the table in the other room, “we should clear that off, too.” They’d need to cool off the cupcakes and cookies before they even thought of icing them.

The kitchen, and Leah’s heart, felt abuzz in a way it hadn’t in a long time. “It’s like riding a bike”, she said as a way to reassure Nicole, sending her a warm glance. In truth, Leah had no idea if the process would come back as easily as that for Nicole. So many other things hadn’t, so why would this be any different? But like with so many other things, Leah opted to push through with an aire of optimism about it- with the intention of picking up the pieces later if it didn’t work. Nicole always responded well to this method, maybe she even found it comforting. “Ingredients and general cat-like duties. An integral part of the baking team!” With that, she grabbed Nicole’s waist and playfully led her toward the counter where she’d started laying out the ingredients, stocked with enough bowls to separate them accordingly. She spun her around once before she set her there for good.

Moving closer to Andy, she grinned, pulling a slip of paper out of her back pocket and sliding it over to her friend. “Way ahead of you”, she said. Sure, the list with various holiday book names was legible, but it was also filled with scrapped ideas being scribbled off and doodles of potential design ideas. She hoped Andy could make it out. “Okay- sounds like a plan”, she chirped, grabbing a bowl to get to work. “Babe, you think you could pour some milk in here for me?”

Then, she flew over towards the dining room table, making quick work of clearing the holiday decorations she and Nicole had laid out there a few days earlier. “What’s your favorite thing to bake, Andy? Do you want to add anything to our list?”

There was a stiffness to her soul, to her spirit. The human one. Nicole wasn’t sure if there was any other way to describe it. It was strange… being. Unnatural. For the longest time, she considered herself atrophied. The fibers of her essence weakened by years spent walking the earth as another being. There was no period of rehabilitation after, only a world that demanded her to be in touch with her humanity as soon as she was thrust back into civilization. But she’d had nothing to offer, she’d been empty at her core, so it became about surviving. Before Leah, it was all she ever did. To laugh, to joke, to even exist peacefully were luxuries she was too depleted to enjoy.

Stiff still moved though, stiff still worked. Heavy, like an old injury that didn’t quite heal as expected. But despite her body’s chronic pushback to the concept of being, her heart fluttered when Leah’s hand reached for her waist guiding her to the correct station. The sound of Andy’s laugh at the unintentional joke elicited her own smile. Tight, weary, but genuine. And still worthwhile. Very much so. The bike analogy didn’t escape her, Leah had used it before too. In every aspect, her return to society had been exactly that. The bikes kept coming. She wished they would fucking stop sometime.

Nicole snapped out of her thoughts before they turned into quicksand in her heart. For now, in this kitchen, surrounded by the people she felt safest with, she could put her soul in motion again. Exercise the muscle of living. She followed Leah’s scent as she rushed to the dining table, grounding herself in the process. Her hands touched the counter as she stood comfortably in her station, observing Andy and Leah hash out the final details. Pouring the milk she was asked to. She could do that, of course. Even if she and milk didn’t get along. She wasn’t incompetent. “Don’t know if there are… Christmassy bear claws” she mumbled, hesitating once Leah’s question came. Her eyes searched for Andy, their stories not too dissimilar. She wondered how she was doing without the bakery. How independence was working for her. If the evening might encourage her to go back. A break was always good, but surely everyone missed her at the Bread Cemetery.

The affection that Leah had for Nicole was bright— so bright in fact, that Andy felt the need to avert her gaze, to focus on something else. It was easier that way, anyway. She didn’t like to feel like she was somewhere she shouldn’t be, even if she and the other two were extremely close, especially now. It wasn’t that the affection made her uncomfortable, it was just that she hadn’t ever experienced anything like it, so it was a little foreign to her.

When Leah ventured back to her side, Andy took the list of book names from her with a grateful smile. “You know me so well.” She scanned the list, only being able to pick out maybe three or four from the lineup. She didn’t think it mattered, but she set it down to the side, careful not to get any flour onto it. She began to combine the dry ingredients into the mixing bowl and moved it closer to Leah’s station. At her question, she shrugged. “Bear claws are fun to make, but croissants take a lot of patience, and I think it’s fun making different ones.” It had taken her awhile to get used to the way precision was necessary, but over time, she got better. Now, her strawberry croissants were to die for, even if Bread Cemetery didn’t offer them. She made them at home, mostly— for Alex when she asked for them. Maybe she’d make them for Leah and Nicole, too.

“I’m sure we could make them Christmassy if we really wanted to.” She leaned against the counter on her side of the station, beginning to work on the second bowl of dry ingredients. “Maybe draw a Rudolph face or something? Alex and I never really got to do the whole Christmas thing, but I’d try to at least do something… maybe that can be a new tradition.” She dumped the salt and baking soda into the bowl and stared down at it, “thanks for inviting me to do this, by the way.” She looked behind her at the two of them. She had offered, but still.

Nicole was always thinking- deep and intuitive inner thoughts were almost constantly etched across furrowed brows. Leah loved to reach forward and smooth them out, even if she couldn’t help fill in any gaps that Nicole was missing. She’d fill them in time, Leah would tell her, though she often worried that sentiment might get more depressing than it was comforting. How much time would it take to experience so many years of missed milestones? It would drive Leah crazy, personally. Nicole was stronger than anyone she knew.

She smirked as Andy took the list from her, raising her eyebrows. “I have a motto, Andy! ‘By failing to prepare, you’re preparing to fail!’ Who would I be without my lists? Just a very well-read flaky person, I suppose.” She chuckled at the thought as she mixed the bowl in front of her, fascinated by how the ingredients combined together so seamlessly. In a way, it reminded her of their friendship. Three people who were so different managed to mold together like the sugar, butter, and flour they were forming into dough. It was a science she wasn’t privy to, but wouldn’t dare question.

“I was thinking the same thing!”, Leah replied right after Andy. “Anything can be made Christmassy, we just have to get creative.” And get creative they did. Like authors thinking up whole worlds of characters, the trio managed to think of ways to many even the blandest pastries into delightful Christmas treats. Nothing they produced felt forced or disingenuous, but then, nothing with the three of them ever felt that way. When they had invited Andy over to help make the treats, Leah had hoped it would be enough to start to save the store- to raise enough money so that they might be able to open again early in the New Year. And sure, the fundraiser was successful- townies were raving about those Rudolf bear claws for weeks. But what Leah hadn’t realized was how much their night together would fix her soul, too. Their time together baking and laughing and reminiscing? She was more grateful for that than any of the money that they raised.

#wickedswriting #w: andy #w: leah #w: what baking can do #w #thank u ci n julie for writing w me

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tozettastone · 9 months

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I've been watching Wynonna Earp! The first season was fun, second season... uh, it's going. The jury's still out on whether I think it's as coherent.

Thoughts, with only very mild spoilers for s1:

I feel like, although this show is Americana, it's somehow the direct opposite of Supernatural's Americana. Supernatural has the vibe of like, misty trees, glowing vacancy lights, free-refills-and-cherry-pie, winding roads, classic rock on the radio Americana; Wynonna Earp is like, you know, whiskey at the only saloon in town at noon on tuesday, country town, gunshot gunshot YEEHAW Americana.

They are both definitely Americana though. I don't care that they're both, you know, made in Canada. This is a vibes based assessment.

I like that the main character is a woman who's clearly a massive fuckup, although I could wish she was canonically about ten or fifteen years older. Shows aren't brave enough to give us many forty year old woman fuck ups as main characters yet, and that's a shame. Cowards. But I do like a fuck up and at least she's not a teenager. Thank you, Wynonna.

I think Katherine Barrell is very cute as Nicole Haught! No notes, she's adorable.

I'm also kind of liking seeing the Waverly/Nicole relationship played straight (no pun intended). I am often kind of dubious about token gay shit on screen because, like, yaaaawn, but I'm into s2 now and I think I am satisfied that their relationship does actually have like, a level of care and attention taken in its depiction? Even if everything is shit from here on out, I can be satisfied, like, "yeah, they did try, actually," and that's a nice feeling sometimes.

Lastly, I enjoy Doc Holliday's character but I sincerely hope I never get the desire to write a fic about him because, oh my god, that dialect would kill me. I looked up some fanfic and I am getting the sense that either it changes a lot over the next few seasons, or otherwise that even the US Americans in the audience haven't figured out how to replicate the idiomatic expressions and rhythm. Oof.

#(I did see what they did there when s1 hospitalised Nicole told Nedley her pet cat doesn't like men though. Cheap. Funny. But cheap.)#tozette.txt

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mrchalamet-mrstyles · 1 year

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To the Charmie apologists who think they're being unfairly blamed for the hate posted to Nicole & HA's IG accounts:

TOUGH SHIT.

Charmies are scum and have earned all the blame and lousy karma coming their way as payback for years worth of disgusting behavior.

Whoever these "fans" actually stan doesn't matter. They are kissing cousins to the dregs of this fandom. Universally despised.

To the anon who said their numbers are dwindling? GOOD. But they'll hold on to the bitter end, trust me. Even when Tim and their Cannibal King are married/remarried to WOMEN they will be sending hate and death threats because they can't handle the reality beyond their cult.

The only Charmies left are the die hards who pledge allegiance to Charmie on the daily and swear they'll never stop "believing." You can't reason with people who share a cult mindset. But you can continue to call them out and broadcast their lies and misdeeds.

Thank you Monika for being so brave. You get the stick for all of us.

Damn, woman. I take my hat off to you. Keep going.

🙌

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narrie · 11 months

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nicole's boyfriend didn't delete his Instagram he just changed his name 😭 and he literally commented on her latest post just this morning 😐 plus i think her, her sister and that other blonde woman had been invited by madi diaz since they are all friends 👀

well then he's truly brave

#ask

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overkill-max · 1 year

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My Fics - Masterpost

Just a masterpost of all my fanfics and drabbles.

Fandoms:

Special Ops: Lioness (Aaliyah Amrohi/Cruz Manuelos)

Willow (Kit Tanthalos/Jade Claymore)

First Kill (Calliope Burns/Juliette Fairmont)

Terminator: Dark Fate (Grace/Dani Ramos)

The Expanse (Bobbie Draper/Monica Stuart)

Supergirl (Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor)

Wynonna Earp (Wynonna Earp/Nicole Haught)

Station 19 (Maya Bishop/Carina DeLuca)

A Country Called Home (Ellie/Reno)

SPECIAL OPS: LIONESS

Hard To Forget

What if Cruz admits that she is broken after what Joe puts her through in SERE? How would that knowledge change the trajectory of her life? Everything should be different once Cruz gets out of the Lioness program. But Cruz can't stop some things from taking place. She can only try to protect Aaliyah with the little time they have left.

AKA

The Canon Adjacent Fix-It AU

One Shot | Words: 14,397 |

Duty and Desire

FBI Special Agent Amrohi is sent to the Middle East to help with interrogations. Death threats are issued and soon she goes from being safe to needing constant protection. What happens when Marine Security Guard Manuelos meets the unstoppable force that is Agent Amrohi? Just how easy is it to do your duty when it intersects with desire?

AKA

The Bodyguard AU

Chapters: 4/4 | Complete | Words: 17,877 |

Second Chances

Aaliyah Amrohi Al Rashdi is lost. Her husband was recently murdered, and she is worried about her little girl getting kidnapped. With only a name and an impressive resume to go on, she hires a former marine to keep her daughter safe. But what happens when there’s a connection between them?

AKA

The Man on Fire AU

One Shot | Words: 7,346 |

Brave Enough To Love

What if Cruz had chosen to follow her heart instead of her duty but Aaliyah goes through with the wedding? Aaliyah gets married and just as she predicted that was the last she saw of New York for a long time. With nothing but her memories and betrayal in her mind, how can Aaliyah get out of a situation she doesn’t want to be in?

AKA

The Rescue Me AU

One Shot | Words: 9,251 |

The Arrangement

Cruz and Aaliyah were always destined to meet by bumping into each other. This time, Aaliyah is the one that instigates their meeting because she needs a protector and a friend. Little did she know, she would find more than that in a young marine.

AKA

The Fake Marriage AU

Chapters: 4/4 | Complete | Words: 15,587 |

The Lost Mask

Aaliyah Amrohi considers herself an amateur treasure hunter. What happens when she stumbles upon a journal that claims the Funerary Mask of Thājite Princess is a fake, and the real article was stolen during the Roman period? With the mask over 5,000 kilometers away, and mercenaries at her heels; can Aaliyah trust a woman she just met to keep her safe while she tries to unearth the mask?

AKA

The Sexy Treasure Hunter AU

Chapters: 3/3 | Complete | Words: 10,340 |

Love and War

Aaliyah is a reporter sent to Pakistan to report on the Global War on Terror. What she thought would be a military propaganda piece will forever change her life.

AKA

The War Correspondent AU

Chapters: 4/4 | Complete | Words: 13,657 |

Queen of the Sun

Cruz is left for dead. She finds love in the unlikeliest of places.

AKA

The Warrior AU

One Shot | Words: 2,685 |

Tutor Me

Aaliyah never needed to know how to drive. Except now. With her dad mad at her for choosing a less prestigious school over NYU, he takes her driver away in hopes Aaliyah will reconsider. Once she realizes what it means to be in a small town with no car, she enlists Cruz’s help for those driving lessons she never had.

AKA

The Learning How To Drive AU

One Shot | Words: 8,199 |

Announcement No. 746

After fighting many wars, Cruz is looking for a better way to live her life. Forty words later, she is listed in a mail-order newspaper as seeking one thing: matrimony. Aaliyah is a widow looking for some companionship. What happens when out of curiosity, she sends out a letter to the person behind the announcement in The Matrimonial News?

AKA

The Mail-Order Bride AU

One Shot | Words: 3,946 |

First Date: Take Two

The last time Aaliyah had seen Cruz was 15 years ago. They were meant to go on a date, but she got stood up. Aaliyah had been heartbroken. Now that she’s back home Cruz asks for another shot at a first date. Will things go better the second time around?

AKA

The First Date AU

One Shot | Words: 10,267 |

Once, We Were In Love

On the frontier, two women from different worlds fall in love.

AKA

The Last of the Mohicans AU

One Shot | Words: 6,014 |

WILLOW

Escaping Fate

No throne, no kingdom. Just a woman who runs away when she’s faced with the choice of marrying someone she doesn’t love or the possibility of never seeing the person that means the most. Sometimes, the choice you are given is not the one you wanted. And even then, it might still lead you back to the beginning. Showing you that no matter the choice, you can’t escape your fate.

AKA

The “what if Kit runs away” AU

Chapters: 4/4 | Complete | Words: 30,037 |

Fulfilling Fate

No matter the choice, you can’t escape your fate… but what happens when you’re not the same person that was meant to take a trip through the unknown? How many other ways can destiny crush you as it tries to ensnare you in its strands to pull you onto the path it had carved out for you in the beginning.

AKA

The Escaping Fate Sequel

Chapters: 4/4 | Complete | Words: 26,894 |

The Dark Princess and her Shattered Throne.

Kit falls into the vermiscus liquid and gets corrupted. What happens as they try to save Airk, while running out of time to help Kit? [Story starts before 1x06. A speculative fic written as episodes aired.]

AKA

The “corruption and redemption” canon adjacent AU

Chapters: 4/4 | Complete | Words: 17,740 |

Offspring of the Wind

Without knowing who she can trust in a strange and foreign kingdom, Kit takes her daughter and heads towards the only safe place she ever knew. Things get complicated when King Hastur sends men after her once they find her husband’s dead body. In a desperate attempt to survive, she seeks the help of a stranger with a dark past who promises to help her get home, but are things as they seem?

AKA

The Dark Fantasy AU

Chapters: 3/3 | Complete | Words: 16,318 |

The First Time

A short moment in time of what happens after the kiss but before they leave the Shattered Sea. Set during episode 1x07.

One Shot | Words: 2,687 |

Burn Your Name Upon My Skin

The name is burned upon her skin, but it’s not the one Kit wants to read.

AKA

The Soulmate AU

One Shot | Words: 2,939 |

Duty Bound

They married for duty, not knowing it would lead to friendship, and later, love.

AKA

The Arranged Marriage AU

One Shot | Words: 7,571 |

The Rise of Captain Kit

Kit drunkenly joins the Royal Navy and accidentally become a legend.

AKA

The Pirate AU

One Shot | Words: 7,196 |

A Love Foretold

Before her mother died, Sorsha had a dream. A prophecy that would lead to her downfall. Her child of surprise. Her unexpected baby, shall marry a red headed princess of blood and bone. Once this is done, it would spell out the end of her reign.

AKA

The Prophecy AU

One Shot | Words: 5,119 |

Wife Wanted

Jade fell in love with a picture of a woman she had never met. Words on a screen followed. And then the calls started. Sometimes falling in love takes some distance before you can get a little closer.

AKA

The Internet Dating AU

One Shot | Words: 5,701 |

The Slaughtered Lamb: Tavern and Inn

What if the little inn at the Pitiless Pass is still standing? Family owned, The Slaughtered Lamb is ready to greet travelers with a cold beer, a clean bed, and a warm meal.

AKA

The Travellers Rest AU

One Shot | Words: 3,829 |

FIRST KILL

First Silence

Just after the "First Betrayal" takes place, Juliette turns to the one person that promised her the impossible: humanity. The problem is that Oliver wanted Juliette to be human, not Theo. This starts off the First Silence, an impossible curse that could work or could kill her.

AKA

The Fairy Tale AU

One Shot | Words: 7,438 |

The King's Daughter

Juliette takes part of a program designed to boost the population of New France. She leaves her family behind for the promise of a dowry and a husband she gets to choose. Instead, she gets a wife and a quiet life in the colonies.

AKA

The Filles du Roi AU

One Shot | Words: 4,779 |

First Love. Through The Ages.

Calliope and Juliette had met before, but they didn’t know it. They would meet again and didn’t know that either. In fact, they were destined to meet forever. To find love and lose it. They were doomed soulmates. Until the fates decided that they got it right.

AKA

The Romeo and Juliet AU

Chapters: 4/4 | Complete | Words: 21,122 |

TERMINATOR: DARK FATE

100 Ways To Change Fate

Grace takes a one-way ticket to the past. The mission: save the girl at all costs. The problem? They fall in love and now fate seems to be a bit less set in stone than they originally thought it was.

AKA

The 100 ways to say I love you canon adjacent AU

Chapters: 5/5 | Complete | Words: 33,830 |

Fate's Gamble

Grace and Sarah are setting off on an adventure of a lifetime. They have put all their hard-earned savings towards buying a passage on a steamer towards Canada and enough supplies to make the 10-week journey to a place where the rivers are filled with gold. The problem is that as soon as they step foot on the boat, Grace meets a girl, Dani, and their plans get derailed.

AKA

The Gold Rush AU

Chapters: 4/4 | Complete | Words: 19,600 |

THE EXPANSE

The Reporter and The Sergeant

Monica and Bobbie meet during a tense standoff inside the ring. When it becomes the slow zone incident. Then, they meet once again, under enemy fire and dangerous circumstances. Can anything come from meeting like this, time and time again? Or are they destined to pass each other and never touch?

AKA

The “Monica takes one look at Bobbie in the Roci and wants to climb her like a tree” canon adjacent AU

Chapters: 5/5 | Complete | Words: 27,235 |

SUPERGIRL

Finding My Way Back to Who I Was Always Meant to Be

Lena craves the love and affection she’s slowly been getting from the woman that was cold to her for most of her life. Board members that were downright hostile to her are suddenly agreeing with her without a second thought. Her relationship with Veronica Sinclair is finally going in a positive direction. On paper her life should be perfect. But she feels torn between this glimpse of what she always wanted her life to be and knowing that this house of cards will fall, and she needs to figure out if she’s going to fall with it or do the right thing…

An alternative take on Season 2 that is more Lena Luthor centric.

Chapters: 3/3 | Complete | Words: 17,012 |

Don't Ever Look Back

They just graduated college and Lena needs to get away from it all. What starts as a way to find some breathing room ends up with them falling in love. The problem is that Lena is set to go to Metropolis and Kara will stay at National City. Can one summer be enough?

AKA

The Teenage Dream AU

One Shot | Words: 10,023 |

Lost and Found: A Serendipitous Love Story

Lena Luthor finds solace in her favorite Twitch streamer's optimist attitude. When she disappears after Metropolis gets caught in some bombings, a worried Kara has Winn hack into Twitch to find her missing friend. What happens when someone that values their privacy is suddenly found?

AKA

the Twitch AU

One Shot | Words: 7,341 |

The Keeper of the Lights

Lillian Luthor, the widowed matriarch of the Luthor family must go into town for resupplies, leaving her children to keep the light at the Swan Beach Lighthouse. With supplies running low and waves crashing on the rocks, Lena must attempt a daring rescue, not knowing that those strangers would change their lives forever.

or the Lighthouse keeper AU

One Shot | Words: 5,208 |

I’m Going To Lure You Into The Dark

From the ashes of Krypton, comes a new world. One where Lena has power beyond measure and Kara rules beside her.

AKA the Dark New Krypton!AU

Where a Kryptonian Lena worships Yuda Kal and is seduced by the power she wields on New Krypton.

One Shot | Words: 3,434 |

The Stars, Your Eyes and the Vastness of Space

Supergirl dies. The vastness of space becomes her new tomb. Lena is unmoored once she learns who Supergirl truly was. Alex doesn’t know how to cope with the grief of losing a sister that knew she was going to die while trying to save a Worldkiller.

One Shot | Words: 4,842 |

And They Shall Reap the Whirlwind

Lena falls in love with the mysterious cowboy she hired to tend to her ranch. A/U Set in the 1900s.

One Shot | Words: 4,215 |

WYNONNA EARP

Hockey AU

Wynonna Earp has to deal with something worse than the Jack of Knives: her growing feelings for a certain redhead that refuses to back down from her attraction to Wynonna. Sometimes the right Earp is not the one you think. Set around 01x08.

One Shot | Words: 6,621 |

Vikings AU

Wynonna is a mess... until she isn’t. Thanks to Nicole.

Drabble | Words: 438 |

Hogwarts AU

A Slytherine Earp Heir. A Gryffindor Haught without a past. Magic finds a way.

Drabble | Words: 722 |

STATION 19

Wedding mini-fic

A mini-fic of what happens during and after the wedding. From the perspective of Maya’s mom.

One Shot | Words: 2,338 |

Short Carina Study

Just a small character study of Carina set in 04x02.

Drabble | Words: 647 |

A COUNTRY CALLED HOME

Home Sweet Home

Just a small character study of Ellie and Reno during the movie and a bit of wishful thinking about what happens once they get to LA.

One Shot | Words: 5,647 |

#my fanfic #my drabbles

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negrowhat · 1 year

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Ahh, you are so brave for re-watching Sleepy Hollow. I don’t think I’ve ever been so taken with a show and then promptly let down. The experience truly jaded me as a person 😂😭. Abbie was such an on screen presence, she deserved everything and got nothing. Although, I hope you are having fun watching it with hindsight!

Abbie literally gave everything and I wish she would've listened to Jenny more instead of trusting Katrina's lying ass so much. I loved Sleepy Hollow so much because it was the first supernatural series I ever saw that starred a dark skinned black woman. Abbie holds such a special place in my heart. I just hate that Nicole and Orlando faced so much racism by the showrunners and them giving pushback caused their characters to get killed off. Abbie and Nicole deserved so much better. I'm glad the series tanked after s4.

#i haven't seen this damn series since it aired and i'm literally just here for abbie and jenny and irving

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tlbodine · 2 years

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Karyn Kusama

A relatively new face in our horror directors study, Karyn Kusama is nevertheless a name to watch out for. I first became familiar with her work in the 2009 film Jennifer's Body, a movie which I adore and which has earned its cult classic status after a disastrous release. I didn't even know until later that she was also the director responsible for 2015's The Invitation, which was a bit of a sleeper hit for me -- I went in with no idea what to expect and was blown away with how good it was.

So we were eager to sample a bit more of her work this week.

youtube

XX (2017) is an anthology film with shorts from four female directors. Kusama directs the final film in the bunch and is probably the biggest name. The others involved are people I'm unfamiliar with: Jovanka Vuckovic, Annie Clark and Roxanne Benjamin.

Kusama's short, "Her Only Living Son" is something of a reimagining or sequel to Rosemary's Baby, which maybe was supposed to be a twist but we called it immediately. It's clever enough, though the ending is a bit of a letdown.

It's a fun anthology though, and totally worth watching if you like horror shorts (and I do).

youtube

Destroyer (2018) is not a horror movie. Let's just get that out of the way first. It's a crime thriller starring Nicole Kidman (yes, really) as a cop with some emotional baggage out to settle an old score.

It's...hm. I think this movie got a fair amount of attention when it came out, largely due to Kidman's mostly unrecognizable self (like when Monster came out, there's always talk about how "brave" it is for these actresses to "ugly" themselves for a role). This wasn't really my thing, and I think these days I just....can't really get into cop shows anymore. I had a problem getting into Spiral (the Saw movie) for the same reason.

Part of the issue with this movie for me is it leans hard into the "oooh, gritty badass with loose morals!" archetype, except tries to flip it on its head by having a woman in that role instead....but kind of fails, by having her still have the same types of flaws we're used to seeing women have in these stories, like being overly emotional and hung up on their kids. So she's sort of the worst of both worlds and has no real redeeming hook or charm.

It felt like it was trying to dismantle certain tropes and then instead just fell into other, worse tropes.

But somebody else might have liked this one better. If you like gritty cop procedurals, give it a shot, maybe?

#karyn kusama #horror directors #horror movies #xx #destroyer #Youtube

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thanksforthedinosaur · 2 years

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august 2022

1. trella - deep cut 2. felivand - big little 3. emily vaughn - tesla 4. hayley kiyoko - supposed to be 5. sabrina carpenter - nonsense 6. nina nesbitt - no time (for my life to suck) 7. charlie houston - dinosaurs in the garden 8. fletcher - becky’s so hot 9. mothica - absinthe 10. renforshort - made for you 11. daine - sleepwalking 12. beabadoobee - sunny day 13. claire rosinkranz - 123 14. maggie lindemann - you're not special 15. dodie - got weird 16. kailee morgue - stfu 17. aurora - the devil is human 18. nicolle galyon - self care. 19. king princess - i hate myself, i want to party 20. rina sawayama - catch me in the air 21. cappa - bad bitch 22. charli xcx - hot girl (bodies bodies bodies) 23. cryalot - hell is here 24. cassie marin - lil 5i5 25. billie eilish - tv 26. alvvays - pharmacist 27. the mountain goats - wage wars get rich die handsome 28. momma - brave 29. career woman - sleep in 30. fazerdaze - come apart 31. beach bunny - weeds 32. pinkshift - i'm not crying you're crying 33. sorry - let the lights on 34. pool kids - arm's length 35. looming - burnedbridgesfinal.mp3 36. armor for sleep - how far apart 37. the darling fire - rituals 38. options - take time 39. goon - wavy maze 40. gulfer - greetings 41. birds in row - nympheas 42. loma prieta - sunlight 43. carmody - well 44. florist - two ways 45. julien baker - guthrie 46. alex g - cross the sea 47. madison cunningham - in from japan 48. mallory merk - isolate myself 49. johanna warren - i'd be orange 50. laura veirs - new arms 51. tommee profitt - i'll be 52. rachel bobbitt - watch and see 53. fresh - fuck-up 54. emily yacina - dominos 55. baseball gregg - olympic white 56. field medic - i had a dream that you died 57. men i trust - hard to let go 58. sorcha richardson - shark eyes 59. mise en scene - you feel good 60. yuna - risk it all 61. wyldest - tin foil girl 62. metric - false dichotomy 63. meltycanon - kuriboh 64. maggie rogers - be cool 65. ian sweet - star stuff 66. purity ring - saltkin 67. blonde maze - forever sun 68. porter robinson - everything goes on 69. lilyisthatyou - for eve 70. piri & tommy - on & on 71. perfume - time warp - v1.1 72. wjsn - last sequence 73. tiger goods - busy 74. rico nasty - phuckin lady 75. doja cat - kiss me more 76. tommy genesis - heartbeat 77. savannah cristina - confidence 78. danileigh - hate to see it 79. lizzo - special 80. beyoncé - i'm that girl 81. jimmy vegas - so serious 82. kota the friend - 365 days of peace 83. flo milli - pretty girls 84. phnkyy - friends 85. phora - habitual pain https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6QicfnoHwcHd6IGEDTGKej?si=60df127733fc4e9f

#mae makes playlists

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henryandkalcavillsdogpack41482 · 2 years

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From this:

1, 8, 12, 15 and 29.

💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

@theluxuriousfangirl asked for questions 1, 8, 12, 15, and 29, and I replied. The most challenging question for me to answer had to be 12 because I have a bunch of favorite authors, I used to read a lot for leisure. Anyways, these are my answers.

What’s your favorite character(s) to write for?

I started to get into writing again and for Sebastian Stan. If it’s Bucky/Sebastian Stan-related, I’ve only been able to two for them (Birthday Girl and Rock Star). I have them posted up on my Tumblr page and I'll share the links for them as well. Starting to enjoy writing for him and some of his various movie characters. In the past, actor wise I’ve written for Orlando Bloom, some for his other movie roles, Pirates of the Caribbean, Jackson Rathbone, Kellan Lutz (I was a huge Twilight fan when the movies were out).

8. Do you prefer writing one-shots or multi-chaptered stories?

When I was younger (20 moons ago lol) back during the early 2000’s when I was working in retail, in college for my first unfinished college degree, I had the energy wasn’t tired, I loved writing multi-chaptered stories. My old Orlando Bloom ones got tons of feedback when I was in Yahoo Orlando Bloom fan groups These days, it seems I am lucky if I can find some time where I can work on and write a one-shot.

12. Who is your favorite author?

Hmm tough question, I have a lot. In my teens, I loved Johanna Lindsey, I often bought her books. I later got into more erotic romances by Susan Johnson and Robin Schone. In my twenties, I liked Allison Brennan Mystery, Thriller, and Romance. Lately, I’ve been reading Sadie Kincaid’s books. Her new book in the LA Ruthless series just came out on June 3rd. I also like Lindsey Powell, Amber Adams, Fiona Cole, and Nicole Snow. My list often grows because of author’s books popping up in my Facebook feed. I sometimes will share in my Tumblr posts about books I just finished reading or what are some of my favorites that aren’t exactly erotic-related romance.

15. What is the fanfic you’ve written that you’re most proud of?

Well, if you can consider a movie script a form of fanfic, I would say my first movie script called Shattered I wrote in May 2007. I wrote that after I had just gotten out of an abusive relationship/engagement it helped me heal and find some closure. It didn’t hurt that seeing Pirates of the Caribbean 3, 9 times either helped with how fast I was writing it. It was the first piece of my work that I actually got registered with the Writers Guild Of America (WGA) in March 2015 and actually sent to Kellan Lutz to read as a 30th birthday gift. It also was a way of saying thanks for commenting me that I was vocal, and he liked that about me, giving me courage to get brave enough finally do that. After doing that, I wouldn’t rule out trying to write something for Sebastian Stan.

29. What part of the writing process do you enjoy the most? (Brainstorming, outlining, writing, editing, etc)

It’s probably got to be Brainstorming. I don’t think my brain ever sleeps or takes a break from wanting to be creative. I can get ideas at the most random times or most random of places. I wish I could just be able to write the story in my head alone since it can play out like a movie preview. I also have a bit too much fun when I get into research.

#fan fic writer asks #fan fiction writer #script writer #question one #question eight #question tweleve #question 15 #question 29 #question twelve was a real hard one I collected a large number of favorite book aurthors throughout the years

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cyarskj1899 · 2 years

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youtube

My heart is broken Shae Moss and Lady Ruby are American heroes.

Trump's MAGA fanatics stalked Shaye Moss and tried to conduct a "citizens arrest." Her grandmother was home. These are Black women, in the South. And if you don't know what "citizens arrest" means, it means lynch mob.

Trump and Rudy drove these election workers out of their homes and into forced seclusion and fear. MAGA fanatics did a home invasion on Raffensperger's daughter-in-law. They invaded our Capitol, wielding confederate flags. There is no honor in Trumpism. I feel sick to my stomach

On Nicole Wallace @DrJasonJohnson says the level of rage he's heard from Black people after the Moss testimony is something he hasn't heard since George Floyd.

I agree with that statement. his rage is equivalent to mine as a woman in general, an African American and a black woman . We need to let that anger become the motivation to turn out to vote in larger numbers than ever before.

These are 2 good and brave Americans.

who were unjustly punished for doing the right thing. punished and threatened for defending our democracy.

this is terrorism and racism

Everyone should be outraged.

EVERYONE.

#Youtube

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snowlessknitter · 5 days

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The Masked Singer: S11 E8 (Group B Returns/Girl Group Night)

This week sees the final Wildcard enter the competition. I am watching on a delay tonight (been watching the Atlanta Braves game against the Miami Marlins), but I have managed to keep myself from seeing spoilers.

As always, I post before seeing any unmaskings, so don’t take these guesses as spoilers.

Miss Cleocatra 🐈: A snake, a domino with 5 dots on it. Photos of Bette Midler and Whoopi Goldberg. Is apparently an inspiration to Michelle Obama…and her mother. Definitely sounds like an older woman, but I can’t place who it is. The bonus clue: “Stop! (in the Name of Love)” by The Supremes. Could she be a member of The Supremes? I don’t think this is Diana Ross. I think both the judges’ guesses of Loretta Divine and Jenifer Lewis are good guesses, though. I’m officially stumped.

Beets 🍠: I immediately thought this was Ruben Studdard and Clay Aiken in their first performance, but will the clues and a second performance confirm it for me? One Beet calls himself “the ladies’ man” and the other calls himself “the tough guy”. Well, Clay’s fanbase (mostly women) called themselves the “Claymates”. We see a sprig of mistletoe. I believe Ruben and Clay have previously done a Christmas album or Christmas tour together. We see a boarding pass. A menu and a castle made of bread. I can still recognize Clay’s voice from a mile away all these years later. The bonus clue: “Weak” by SWV. They say they made their audience “weak” in the knees on Broadway. Ruben and Clay did a Christmas-themed show on Broadway. So, yes, I’m sticking with Ruben Studdard and Clay Aiken.

Gumball 🍬: A set of angel’s wings. His wife has a disease that will impact her later in life. A crescent moon and a globe used as a bowling ball. It’s been a while since I’ve seen his previous clue package, so I can’t remember his previous clues. The bonus clue: “Don’tcha” by the Pussycat Dolls. Perhaps he knows Nicole Scherzinger? Nope, he says he starred in something with Channing Tatum. I think Derek Hough was the best guess here, as his wife recently suffered a health crisis and he has also done some music with his sister Julianne Hough and their friend and fellow dancer Mark Ballas.

Seal 🦭: Our final Wildcard of the season enters the competition! A treasure chest, perceived as a “wild child”. He says he’s been on some posters on teens’ walls. Was part of a famous group. He’s not that bad of a singer, but doesn’t necessarily sound “polished”. He could be a comedian or maybe somebody from “Jackass”. The bonus clue: “BO$$” by Fifth Harmony. Says he’s got a boss like Steven Spielberg. I think Jenny’s guess of Corey Feldman sounds the most accurate. He was a wild child, part of The Goonies, who search for a treasure. And Corey has released some music. His voice isn’t the most polished, but singing is something he likes to do. I’ll go with Corey Feldman.

#the masked singer #the masked singer season 11

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mirandamckenni1 · 7 months

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youtube

Nicole Emma: Can Sex Work Be Therapeutic? This clip is brought to you by Manscaped, the revolutionary electric body trimmer for men. You can get 20% off plus free shipping by visiting https://ift.tt/1bW5EkS and using code HRU. Nicole Emma is a sex coach, former sex workers, and was a guest on my Playboy TV show, Adult Film School! Together we reminisce on the show where I produced professional sex tapes of amateur couples, and how what happened behind the scenes was very different from what you saw in the show. We also discuss her TED Talk on "What Sex Workers Can Teach Us About Human Connection", how she escaped domestic abuse, and so much more. A really inspiring interview with a brave a remarkable woman, we think you'll really enjoy this episode! Show Notes: 02:17 Holly's experience directing Adult Film School. 03:39 Emma's experience making Adult Film School. 13:32 Her TEDX talk about men, sex, and intimacy. 19:06 Sex workers perform a real service. 22:17 Sex workers help people who might not otherwise have sexual pertners. 29:00 Emma helped to found SWOP Salt Lake City 36:10 Are things changing for sex workers. 41:35 She is a survivor of domestic abuse. To support my show: https://ift.tt/wkcsD4V To make a one time donation: https://ift.tt/vkbw1Pa Shop my merch store! https://ift.tt/WIaRvHg Follow me on Instagram: https://ift.tt/2hVUrQN Follow me on Twitter: https://twitter.com/hollyrandall Visit my Official Podcast site: https://ift.tt/choH5T4 via YouTube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GYqdQVMZN-I

#IFTTT #YouTube #Youtube

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jdgo51 · 8 months

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Something’s Leaking: When We Name It, It Can Be Healed

Today's inspiration comes from:

Brave Enough to Be Broken

by Toni Collier

"I love donuts. Like, a whole bunch."

"'Specifically, Shipley Do-Nuts in Texas. There’s something about the original glaze that rocks my world. But when I was introduced to the snacks in vending machines in middle school, my favorite donut quickly became the small six-pack of Hostess white powdered donuts. Back then, we didn’t have the great healthy snacks in the vending machines like the kids do now. We had the real stuff: soda, candy, and my favorite — the white powdered donut. I couldn’t wait to sit down for lunch with my friends on that hard lunch bench. I’d eat my pizza with the square pepperoni, whatever fruit they’d plopped onto our trays, and my prized possession, the donuts. My favorite memory was when they’d get stuck to the roof of my mouth and I had to take my finger and claw it out. Real attractive!

I remember one day I was sitting with my friends doing the regular routine at lunch, eating my donuts, when I had to use the bathroom. I got up, glared at all my friends, counted my donuts — one, two, three, four — and headed out.

As I skipped back to the table from the bathroom, I squinted at the plastic pack of white delicacies, “One... two... three.” Someone had eaten one of my white powdered donuts. I lost it. I mean I really lost it.

I started yelling at my friends. “Who ate my donut? Who ate my donut?!”

My anger turned into yelling that turned into a wild scream that only rage and hurt could produce. Things escalated and I found myself standing on that lunch bench, yelling at my group of friends to ’fess up and tell me who ate my donut. And then I locked eyes with one of my best friends who hadn’t said a word and whose mouth had been weirdly sealed shut.

I looked over at her and asked, “Nicole, did you eat my white powdered donut?”

She burst out laughing and white powder spewed all over the table.

I lost it. Again. I screamed at her and told her to take her finger and scrape my donut off the roof of her mouth.

Seconds later the vice principal, a slender African American woman who knew me well, tapped on my shoulder and asked me to come to her office. The table filled up with “Ooohs” as I stepped one foot after the other and walked through the cafeteria looking down at the tile floor until it turned into the carpet that welcomed me into the vice principal’s office. As soon as we sat down, the unraveling of the white powdered donut saga began.

“Antoinee’, you’re a great student. What’s going on?” she asked gently. (Antoinee’ is my legal name.)

“Nothing,” I replied. Giving the typical preteen answer that translates to I’m lying and don’t want to tell you.

She was unfazed.

“You’re captain of the cheerleading team, you’re on student council, you’re a part of the drama team’s Thespian Society, and you work here in my office on your off period. I know you and you’re a good student. Can you share with me why you were yelling and standing on the cafeteria table?”

“Nicole ate my white powdered donut!” I blurted out.

“And that’s why you were yelling and crying? And standing on Harris County property? One white powdered donut?” she asked, knowing there was more.

“Well, it was my white powdered donut, and she didn’t even ask and—”

She cut me off. “Antoinee’, I would love for you to share what’s really going on,” she said as she placed her hand on my shoulder.

It seems like every time someone does the sentimental touch on the shoulder, the real stuff comes out, doesn’t it? I burst into tears and sobbed. My head bowed down low; my shoulders were shaking. And even though I could’ve told her everything that was going on, I lied and told her I’d just gone through a bad breakup.

The truth was that my mom had been in and out of the hospital, and there I was, balancing her health and school and seeking validation from my dad.

If we’re going to heal from it, we’ve got to name it.

After my mom’s first stroke when I was in the third grade, sickness had plagued her body. One massive stroke was followed by three ministrokes, blood clots in her legs, her large intestine failing, carpal tunnel surgery in both hands, seizures, and so much more. I’d helped her get to doctors’ appointments, held her hair and made sure she didn’t swallow her tongue during bad seizures. I’d spent nights in the hospital feeding her and making sure the doctors did what they were supposed to. And I was scared. I was scared every night that I would wake up without a mom. That she would be taken from me.

So when Nicole took my white powdered donuts, it triggered me. Those were my white powdered donuts. And with the threat of the most important person being taken away from me being a daily fear, I was deeply attached to the things I could control. The things that I held close, big or small.

If you know what it feels like to be stuck in a cycle of trauma, to be “bossed around” by old pain, perhaps you’re feeling like little Antoinee’ right now.

The way I coped was by trying to control what I could. What were the ways you struggled to survive? Maybe you retreated into a safe space. Maybe you turned your anger toward others. Maybe you bit your nails. Or cut yourself. Maybe today you’re shopping and spending to soothe that pain. Whatever your coping mechanism of choice, believe me, I get it. In fact, I understand exactly why you’d want to keep your pain hidden — from others and maybe even from yourself. As a girl, you were smart about what you needed. And you figured out how to soothe yourself.

But as you matured, those little girl–sized defenses didn’t fit anymore. The ones you thought would help you might now be hindering you, keeping you from a healed and whole life.

But this book wasn’t written to shame you about the decisions you’ve made to survive the pain you’ve been through. Rather, I want to encourage you to bring all your pain to light.

We need to bring our pain into the light because it’s in the light where healing and hope are found. The truth is that unhealed trauma will keep impacting us. We can’t run from it. Our minds, hearts, and bodies weren’t made for it, and so we are consciously and unconsciously clawing our way to relief and refuge. Our bodies want freedom and true hope. And when we don’t find that, the very things we use to numb the pain become the choices that can harm us. At some point our bodies will give out. When we haven’t learned healthy ways to heal from our pain, we end up medicating ourselves to an internal death.

I remember the moment young Toni started to die inside. When she lost her awe and wonder for the world and stopped playing. When even her longtime friends who used to call her a “Teletubby” because she was so consistently joyful, saw her light start to dim. It was a distinct and dark turn that took me years to recognize. I was thirteen.

It was the last day of my freshman year in high school. My parents had gone to Louisiana to visit family and were still driving back home when I got out of school. I invited my secret boyfriend, who was way too old for me, over to our house. We’d been trying to have sex all year, but it wasn’t working. The pain was too great.

I didn’t want to be a virgin anymore because I thought if it happened, he would stay with me — that he would show me the affection that I sought desperately. I needed to feel a sense of accomplishment too, and I thought maybe he’d show me that he was proud of me. Then on the last day of school we were in my bedroom trying again as his best friend sat in our living room, and that day it worked. I remember being so happy, so pleased with myself. We kissed one last time before he left. Then I closed the door and locked it. I also closed the door on young Toni. Her childhood innocence, her awe and wonder, were now locked out.

My desire to be noticed and seen turned into twerking at parties so all the boys would dance with me and all the girls would be jealous. I turned to drugs and getting drunk until I couldn’t remember the nights of partying. My rage leaked out as I punched walls and defied my parents. My longing to be beautiful and skinny turned into bulimia, so I could eat what I wanted without keeping it down long enough to absorb too many calories.

Still today, I sometimes get mad that no one saw how much I was hurting or offered to help. And then I get upset with myself about shaking off my tears and lying to the vice principal about where my pain was coming from. Maybe she would have helped me start a healing process the day of the white powdered donut saga and I wouldn’t have sunk even further into a shame cycle, winding deeper and deeper down into a lifestyle of coping that I didn’t think I could escape from.

I became the party girl, but really I was the broken girl trying to escape the realities of her life. I was on social media pretending that life was good so often that I inadvertently convinced my own heart of the same. My dangerous and damaging coping tactics numbed me. I had bought into what the Enemy often tries to plant in our hearts:

You’re too broken to be fixed. You’re too blemished to start over. You’re already canceled.

The Enemy had his eye on me even before I accepted Jesus into my heart. He thought if he could plant these lies into my heart at an early age, I’d never feel worthy enough for refuge and redemption. Boy, was he wrong."'

Excerpted with permission from Brave Enough to Be Broken by Toni Collier, copyright Toni J. Collier.

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