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hellyeahomeland · 4 years

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“Designated Driver” | Directed by Michael Offer, Cinematography by David Klein

Sara: If I had a dollar for every Homeland episode that opens with Carrie speed-walking while looking over her shoulder every four seconds… I would have about ten dollars.

Gail: The imagery of Carrie looking over her shoulder is very reminiscent of the pilot episode. The closer we get to the end of the show, the more it feels like we have come full circle.

Ashley: Hi everybody, I’m joining Director’s Chair for the very first time because I’m feeling left out. I have no idea what I’m talking about. Anyway, Carrie’s paranoid, and rightly so, but it’s not paranoia if the guy you’re in love with just stuck a needle in your neck.

Sara: I had to take a screenshot of this because this is Claire’s actual handwriting, and long-time readers of this website will know that it seriously bugs me when they try to pass off someone else’s handwriting as Carrie’s. Anyway, this is the real deal, people.

Gail: Another scene that shows a character versus a gang of three. Here the Pakistan Ambassador is up against Hayes, Zabel and Wellington... or is he? Wellington has inched closer to the inner circle of trust, but hasn’t quite made it behind the desk yet. If Hayes represents the center, only Zabel is on his side, while the both the American flag and Wellington are not.

Ashley: This shot, from above, has the same feeling of watching a bomb about to drop. The desk is the target. Will anybody in this room survive the fallout of what’s coming? (Please let it be Wellington.) (What even is coming?)

Sara: I love this shot because of the body language of the four men. Hayes and Zabel are both leaning forward in aggressive stances. Linus has his legs crossed, hand to his chin, thinking of new ways he’d like to be swallowed whole. The ambassador leans back, sort of resigned to this entire clusterfuck.

Ashley: The look on Balach’s face is so… everything. The furrowed brow, clenched jaw, and the intensity of his eyes — he’s barely holding it together, and his expression is pure murder.

Sara: I love this actor who plays Balach (Seear Kohi). He has been so great all season. I finally figured out this week that he looks surprisingly similar to Donald Glover. It’s been bugging me for weeks.

Gail: Balach is not faring as well as advisor to his new boss, (ugh) Jalal, as Wellington is to Hayes. I love the angle they chose for this scene. We see Balach from above and it gives the impression that he is looking down at Jalal, which based on his point of view, he most certainly is.

Gail: Carrie is back in the same place where President Warner thanked her and recognized her for all that she has done. Feels poignant that she shares this moment with Worley back at Bagram. He put President Warner in that helicopter and indirectly, so did she.

Sara: IJLTP.

Sara: I feel like Jenna’s entire storyline really paid off this episode. I loved this detail of her hand shaking when Mike mentions the ops team in the Pakistani jail.

Ashley: Jenna’s been a wildcard all season and this episode humanized her in a very real way. I don’t want more Homeland, but I would be interested in Jenna’s story moving forward. So she’s probably gonna die.

Gail: Jenna’s got a long way to go in her training at the Carrie Mathison Spy School if a little treason gets her this nervous.

Sara: This is such a cool shot. There is an identical one of Quinn in “Iron in the Fire,” which was also directed by Michael Offer.

Sara: This shot reminds me of two things:

that moment in the cartoon How the Grinch Stole Christmas when everyone wakes up and their houses are completely bare.

that moment in “Super Powers” when Carrie paces back and forth, weighing her next move and hesitating, after Jonas leaves.

Everything this season is reminding me of something else, not in a bad way!

Gail: It reminds me of a surveillance shot with the camera mounted up high, giving a full view of the room. We don’t know it at the time, but maybe this is a subtle nod to Carrie being under surveillance while looking for Yevgeny, who finds her with Arman, her designated driver, a short time later.

Ashley: This reminds me of “A False Glimmer,” actually. Carrie returning home to her apartment, mostly expecting Jonas to be gone, but calling his name anyway — ultimately opening a closet to find his things still there; and she’s reassured of his presence. She didn’t expect to find Yevgeny here, but he’s left nothing. The disappointment, to me, reflects her relief at finding that Jonas hadn’t left.

Gail: Ugh, Jonas.

Sara: Yay, Jonas.

Sara: I love the reveal of the other Russian officials seated around the ambassador, watching his phone call with Saul. It’s such an ominous setup.

Gail: Such a great reveal! Very interesting choice to keep the people in the background, out of focus, in this shot. Feels symbolic--the audience can’t see what’s coming, and neither can Saul.

Sara: I stan this friendship.

Gail: My theory that everything goes to hell every time someone smiles still holds.

Ashley: It’s amazing to me that Carrie still has people who are so loyal to her. Don’t they know better?

Gail: Well, Arman is still alive, so, no.

Sara: This Carrie/Yevgeny scene is so great. I love the way it shifts as Carrie processes what Yevgeny is asking for her--as she says later, making an offer she has no choice but to accept. You can see her cycle through the stages of grief: denial that the asset exists, anger that Yevgeny is asking her to do this, bargaining with him (she’ll do anything else), depression when she realizes she has to do it, and finally acceptance.

Gail: Interesting that they had her cycle through the stages of grief. It must mean something is gone that she’ll never get back. The choreography of Carrie walking away from Yevgeny and turning her back on him as she processes what he’s just said is telling too. Not only is he not on her side, he just became her Russian handler.

Ashley: It’s a dreamy shot too, everything blurred behind her, but we’ve really found ourselves in Carrie’s worst nightmare.

Gail: Sorry, Jalal. Yevgeny has already trademarked that lean.

Sara: There was a lot of imagery involving children this episode, which I find very interesting. Here Jalal is literally training young boys to shoot and kill. It gives a new sense of hopelessness to the entire situation. As Balach says, they’re inviting more endless war, and they’re lining up their next generation of soldiers.

Gail: Saul’s body language has continued to morph into a submissive and defeated posture. The stress this man is under makes me worried for his health. A person can only take so much before they break and it seems like Saul is almost there.

Sara: Me watching this damn show.

Ashley: I second.

Sara: I found this moment where Carrie observes the two young girls playing to be especially poignant and a very Homelandian detail. It immediately calls to mind Franny, or, as Gail said on the podcast, the various little girls we see in the opening credits each week, versions of Carrie who have grown up watching war and conflict play out on her television screen.

Sara: Carrie using her earring to remove the SIM card in her phone is such a Carrie thing to do and I have to stan on that one.

Gail: I love the detail because it’s also a callback to Allison in season five when she “tears down her comms” while going into full flight.

Sara: The expression in Carrie’s face here, as she turns herself in, also strikes me as one of grief. To be patted down by soldiers, to have to utter the words “I’m Carrie Mathison. I’m wanted by the FBI”... for a patriot like Carrie, we know this is her absolute worst nightmare.

Gail: I agree. I think Carrie is devastated that it’s all come to this but she also looks resolute. Her gaze is determined and steady, and her movements are calculated. Her line to Saul keeps echoing in my ears: “I did what had to be done.”

Sara: I found a lot of parallels between Carrie’s and Balach’s situations in this episode. Maybe Balach finding his two sons was meant to mirror Carrie seeing those two girls earlier. They act ultimately for those children.

Ashley: The horror at finding his children on-site — I find it hard to believe that Balach didn’t know what this meant at the very second he saw it. He, too, goes through the stages of grief at record speed.

Gail: Ashley’s right, Balach goes through the same stages of grief as Carrie. It’s clearer what Balach is losing in this moment and never getting back: his life. Is that true of Carrie as well?

Gail: Carrie’s cool demeanor versus Jenna’s anxiousness sets up such a powerful scene between them. The coloring of the room is cool, too, done in trademark Homeland blue and gray.

Sara: This is quite a role reversal. Now Jenna towers over Carrie; still, Carrie ends up maintaining the upper hand. I loved this scene and how it paid off the season-long quasi-mentorship between them. Carrie has been teaching her lessons all season, just teaching them the hard way.

Sara: Carrie being on the other side of the interrogation table is not something I ever thought I’d see on this show.

Gail: Carrie’s posture is confident. She is sitting upright, head tilted slightly forward. Her hands are under the desk, revealing nothing. Carrie has probably been in a million interrogations and knows how to play the game.

Gail: So many emotions play across Saul’s face here. We’ve seen Carrie and Balach cycle through the five stages of grief this episode, both of them having their cycles shown within one scene. Saul on the other hand has cycled through his stages over the course of the episode, ending with acceptance in this conversation with Wellington.

Sara: It’s ironic that in the episode where Saul finally steps up to acknowledge the ways in which he’s used Carrie over the years but can’t turn on her now, she makes the crucial decision to potentially betray him. There is a great contrast between Linus’ motives--about optics and politics--and Saul’s--which ultimately boil down to loyalty.

Ashley: I never thought I’d see Sara talking about how Saul’s motives boil down to loyalty, but 2020 is a helluva year.

Sara: IJLTP.

Gail: It looks like a chess board. If Mike thinks he put the Queen in check, he’s got another thing coming.

Sara: Carrie looks stun-ning here. (Requisite acknowledgement of yet another scene where Carrie is filmed from outside a car window.)

Gail: I love this storytelling device the show uses to give us a window into Carrie’s current emotional state. What’s great about this shot specifically for me is the familiar jazz music from Homeland’s opening credits that softly plays in the background as Carrie is being brought home almost a full year later. It’s the first time we’ve heard jazz music in a scene with Carrie all season long. We can see reflections in the window, but over Carrie, the glass is crystal clear. Earlier in the episode Carrie says she can’t see a way out of the hole she’s dug for herself. But just as the glass here is crystal clear, so is Carrie. She knows what she must do.

Sara: Gail, a “window into Carrie’s current emotional state”... literally!

Sara: Love the “GOODBYE PAKISTAN” sign as we’re leaving this setting and returning to America the homeland for the final two episodes.

Ashley: The “GOODBYE PAKISTAN” is interesting because it is in English. Obviously this is for the viewers, but it comes off like a warning.

Gail: It is most definitely a warning. Look at what awaits them on the other side.

Sara: This scene was so stunningly shot. It reminded me a lot of Brody’s tape from “Marine One” and Carrie’s from “Why Is This Night Different?”

Gail: The details were all crafted so well too. From the prop department and set designers, to the moving score from Sean Callery, to the beautiful writing, to the performance from Seear Kohi. Balach accepted his fate in the earlier scene with Jalal, and now he is resolved to do what needs to be done.

Gail: I mentioned this on the podcast, but good Lord does this woman give great side eye. This is the exact same look I give my kids when they say they don’t have homework. I stan.

Sara: Gail, you’re so right. Vanessa Kroll gives excellent side eye.

Gail: Parker, the character shown here, also cycles through the five stages of grief.

Sara: It’s not just Carrie who’s been trapped. The special ops team being literally trapped inside the bus, desperately yelling to be let out, was especially heartbreaking. This season, the show has portrayed multiple characters--major and minor--who are trapped in an endless cycle of war, prisoners of their own ideas and the system in which they operate.

Ashley: There is also just the fact that people are physically entrapped consistently — but they can still see what’s outside. Being able to see things and not stop them or escape them… it’s kind of a motif in this show, amped up to 1000 this season.

Gail: And now, acceptance of a fate he can’t escape.

Sara: This entire sequence was expertly edited, the shouts and commotion drowned out by Sean Callery’s excellent score. Weirdly there is a sense of quiet to it all.

I appreciate the contrast between these two reactions. Parker looks at the bomb barreling toward him and seems to have a sense of acceptance about his fate. Jenna, meanwhile, mostly out of harm’s way, ducks behind a car and her expression is one of fear.

Sara: This final moment where Balach lets out an excruciating scream as flashes of his crying sons play across the scene is heartbreaking. He dies so that they can live. I thought it was--ironically-quite beautiful.

Ashley: Agree that it was beautiful, but it’s terrible insofar as his children are going to grow up under Jalal’s rule. They will never see the peace that their father wanted; they will never even know that’s what he wanted. Balach didn’t have a choice, but his legacy is now embedded in terrorism — not peace.

Gail: Balach had a choice, he chose his family. From their perspective, he’s a hero.

Gail: The symbols on the side of the bus are symbols on the Pakistani flag. The star symbolizes light and knowledge, the crescent moon symbolizes progress. Quite a contrast to the people being held prisoner within.

Sara: The split second before it happens -- the palms pressed against the bus windows is a breathtaking image.

Gail: We don’t need a car window to locate Carrie emotionally now. She’s looking straight ahead, and like Balach in the car, begins her journey to the end.

Sara: The parallel to Carrie in the airplane is an unexpected one, but it fits. She has the same look of resolve in her eyes as Balach. She knows what she must do. She’s blowing up her life in her own way, setting a match to it all. Is she a martyr, or is she a traitor? This scene fits between a cut to white and a cut to black, and that’s where Carrie has always been: in the grey, searching.

Ashley: God help me.

#homeland #homelandedit #designated driver #*#michael offer #in the director's chair #by: sara #by: gail #by: ashley

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bountyofbeads · 4 years

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How Trump Reshaped the Presidency in Over 11,000 Tweets https://nyti.ms/32aaAbV

🍁🏈🍻🍁🏈 🍻🍁🏈 🍻🍁🏈 🍻🍁

This is an incredibly well-researched investigative article looking at Trump's Twitter account. They research the Russian bots, white-supremacist followers and conspiracy groups like Anon. To truly appreciate the full article you need to go to the website to see the graphics and tweets. THREAD by @NYTimes and articles below 👇👇🤔

"We examined President Trump's use of Twitter since taking office, reviewing all his tweets, retweets and followers, and interviewing nearly 50 current and former administration officials, lawmakers and Twitter executives and employees."

"Early on, aides wanted to restrain President Trump's Twitter habit, even considering asking the company to impose a 15-minute delay on his tweets. That didn't happen. A barrage of personal attacks, bombast and outrage over more than 11,000 tweets did."

"President Trump's tweets have helped spread a culture of suspicion and distrust of facts into the political mainstream."

"See how conspiracy-mongers, racists and spies have influenced what he absorbs and amplifies on Twitter."

“The aides seek to cultivate the image of a man who understands ‘regular people.’ Mr. Trump’s team believes that his unvarnished writing, poor punctuation and increasing profanity on Twitter signals authenticity — a contrast to” his rivals’ feeds."

"What happens when ordinary people end up in President Trump's tweets? On May 1, a fire lieutenant in Tuscaloosa found out for himself."

"We hope you have time for all of the articles in this investigation on Donald Trump’s Twitter presidency. But if you don't have time right now, here are some key takeaways."

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How Trump Reshaped the Presidency in Over 11,000 Tweets

By MICHAEL D. SHEAR, MAGGIE HABERMAN, NICHOLAS CONFESSORE, KAREN YOURISH, LARRY BUCHANAN and KEITH Collins | Published Nov. 2, 2019 | New York Times | Posted November 2, 2019 |

(**On the morning of Inauguration Day 2017, Donald J. Trump tweeted an opening message to the United States. What followed was a barrage of personal attacks, outrage and boasting, in a near-constant stream of more than 11,000 tweets over 33 months. At the beginning of his presidency, Mr. Trump tweeted about nine times per day.

In the past three months, President Trump’s tweets have spilled out at triple the rate he set in 2017.)

In the Oval Office, an annoyed President Trump ended an argument he was having with his aides. He reached into a drawer, took out his iPhone and threw it on top of the historic Resolute Desk:

“Do you want me to settle this right now?”

There was no missing Mr. Trump’s threat that day in early 2017, the aides recalled. With a tweet, he could fling a directive to the world, and there was nothing they could do about it.

When Mr. Trump entered office, Twitter was a political tool that had helped get him elected and a digital howitzer that he relished firing. In the years since, he has fully integrated Twitter into the very fabric of his administration, reshaping the nature of the presidency and presidential power.

After Turkey invaded northern Syria this past month, he crafted his response not only in White House meetings but also in a series of contradictory tweets. This summer, he announced increased tariffs on $300 billion worth of Chinese goods, using a tweet to deepen tensions between the two countries. And in March, Mr. Trump cast aside more than 50 years of American policy, tweeting his recognition of Israel’s sovereignty in the Golan Heights. He openly delighted in the reaction he provoked.

“Boom. I press it,” Mr. Trump recalled months later at a White House conference attended by conservative social media personalities, “and, within two seconds, ‘We have breaking news.’”

Early on, top aides wanted to restrain the president’s Twitter habit, even considering asking the company to impose a 15-minute delay on Mr. Trump’s messages. But 11,390 presidential tweets later, many administration officials and lawmakers embrace his Twitter obsession, flocking to his social media chief with suggestions. Policy meetings are hijacked when Mr. Trump gets an idea for a tweet, drawing in cabinet members and others for wordsmithing. And as a president often at war with his own bureaucracy, he deploys Twitter to break through logjams, overrule or humiliate recalcitrant advisers and pre-empt his staff.

“He needs to tweet like we need to eat,” Kellyanne Conway, his White House counselor, said in an interview.

In a presidency unlike any other, where Mr. Trump wakes to Twitter, goes to bed with it and is comforted by how much it revolves around him, the person he most often singled out for praise was himself — more than 2,000 times, according to an analysis by The New York Times.

President Trump is tweeting more than ever. The second week of October was his busiest, with 271 tweets. He regularly takes to Twitter to lash out at his perceived enemies. In fact, he attacks someone or something in more than half of his tweets. Most of these attacks occur in the early morning or later in the evening, when Mr. Trump is more likely to be without his advisers.

The Times examined Mr. Trump’s use of Twitter since taking office, reviewing all his tweets, retweets and followers, and interviewing nearly 50 current and former administration officials, lawmakers and Twitter executives and employees. What has emerged is a rich account, with new analysis, previously unreported episodes and fresh details of how the president exploits the platform to exert power.

No. of tweets ...

that

5,889 attacked someone or something

4,876 praised someone or something

2,405 attacked Democrats

2,065 attacked investigations

2,026. praised President Trump

1,710 promoted conspiracies

1,308 attacked news organizations

It is often by brute repetition. He has taken to Twitter to demand action 1,159 times on immigration and his border wall, a top priority, and 521 times on tariffs, another key agenda item. Twitter is an instrument of his foreign policy: He has praised dictators more than a hundred times, while complaining nearly twice as much about America’s traditional allies. Twitter is the Trump administration’s de facto personnel office: The chief executive has announced the departures of more than two dozen top officials, some fired by tweet.

More than half of the president’s posts — 5,889 — have been attacks; no other category even comes close. His targets include the Russia investigation, a Federal Reserve that won’t bow to his whims, previous administrations, entire cities that are led by Democrats, and adversaries from outspoken athletes to chief executives who displease him. Like no other modern president, Mr. Trump has publicly harangued businesses to advance his political goals and silence criticism, often with talk of government intervention. Using Twitter, he threatened “Saturday Night Live” with an investigation by the Federal Communications Commission and accused Amazon, led by Jeff Bezos, owner of The Washington Post, of cheating the United States Postal Service.

As much as anything, Twitter is the broadcast network for Mr. Trump’s parallel political reality — the “alternative facts” he has used to spread conspiracy theories, fake information and extremist content, including material that energizes some of his base.

Mr. Trump’s use of Twitter has accelerated sharply since the end of the special counsel’s Russia investigation and reached a new high as Democrats opened an impeachment inquiry, the analysis shows. He tweeted more than 500 times during the first two weeks of October, a pace that put him on track to triple his monthly average. (The Times analyzed Mr. Trump’s tweets through Oct. 15. The total by the end of the month reached 11,887.)

His more than 66 million Twitter followers have become his private polling service, offering what he sees as validation for his performance in office. But fewer than one-fifth of his followers are voting-age Americans, according to a Times analysis of Pew Research national surveys of adults who use Twitter.

The White House press office declined to comment for this article and turned down an interview request with the president. Now, as Mr. Trump anticipates a bitter re-election battle and faces an impeachment inquiry by Democrats, the stakes are higher than ever before, and Twitter even more central to his presidency.

His top campaign aides are embracing the outrage that Mr. Trump stirs with his tweets to reinforce his anti-establishment brand and strengthen his bond with the fiercely loyal supporters who propelled him into office. And as public backing for impeachment grows, the president is using the platform to build a defensive echo chamber.

Mr. Trump tweeted his first attack as president on his third day in office. He fired off more than 1,100 attacks over the next year. The most frequent targets of Mr. Trump’s ire are Democrats, news organizations and investigations — specifically the Russia and impeachment inquiries.

Mr. Trump’s attack on four Democratic congresswomen of color in July received a lot of attention, and blowback. It was not the first time he had used Twitter to attack minority groups — and it would not be the last.

The president has tweeted more attacks so far this year than in the previous two years combined. In total, he has attacked at least 630 people and things in 5,889 tweets since taking office.

While people around Mr. Trump acknowledge that his tweets can cause political damage, the president is confident in his mastery of Twitter.

This past week, as he announced that American Special Forces had killed Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the Islamic State, Mr. Trump noted the terror group’s digital prowess. “They use the internet better than almost anybody in the world,” he said. “Perhaps other than Donald Trump.”

POLICY via TWITTER

With a single tweet last fall, Mr. Trump sent his administration into a tailspin. “I must, in the strongest of terms, ask Mexico to stop this onslaught,” he wrote in October 2018, angry about a caravan of migrants from Central America. “If unable to do so I will call up the U.S. Military and CLOSE OUR SOUTHERN BORDER!”

Mr. Trump’s aides had tried for weeks to talk him out of shutting down the border — the logistics would be impossible and the economic pain extreme. The tweet prompted an emergency meeting down the hall from the Oval Office as aides scrambled to head off Mr. Trump’s impulse, according to people familiar with the frantic scene. Like others in this article, they spoke on the condition of anonymity for fear of angering the president.

The aides succeeded in temporarily holding him off, but the tweet crystallized for cautious bureaucrats exactly what he wanted: to stop people from coming into the country. In the months that followed, Mr. Trump’s threat helped to set off an effort inside the government to find ever more restrictive ways to block immigrants. Nearly six months later, Kirstjen Nielsen, the homeland security secretary, was still trying to prevent a border shutdown when the president brought her resistance to an end.

“Kirstjen Nielsen,” he tweeted, “will be leaving her position.”

This is governing in the Trump era. For President Barack Obama, a tweet about a presidential proposal might mark the conclusion of a long, deliberative process. For Mr. Trump, Twitter is often the beginning of how policy is made.

“Suddenly there’s a tweet, and everything gets upended and you spent the week trying to defend something else,” said Representative Peter King, Republican of New York. “This person thrives on chaos. What we may find disconcerting or upsetting or whatever, it is actually what keeps him going.”

In October 2017, Rex W. Tillerson, the president’s first secretary of state, was in China with a team of diplomats negotiating sanctions on Kim Jong-un, the North Korean leader, when Mr. Trump weighed in on Twitter. Mr. Tillerson was “wasting his time trying to negotiate with Little Rocket Man,” he wrote. “Save your energy Rex, we’ll do what has to be done!”

Two months later, a Reuters headline blared that Mick Mulvaney, who then was Mr. Trump’s new pick to lead the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau, had decided to put “on ice” sanctions against Wells Fargo for consumer abuses. It was little surprise: Mr. Mulvaney was an ally of the financial industry. But Mr. Trump had other ideas.

“Fines and penalties against Wells Fargo Bank for their bad acts against their customers and others will not be dropped, as has incorrectly been reported, but will be pursued and, if anything, substantially increased,” he tweeted.

Political appointees at the bureau wanted to affirm Mr. Trump’s desire publicly, despite longstanding policies against commenting on active investigations, according to former officials there. A spokesman for Mr. Mulvaney issued a statement saying only that he “shares the president’s firm commitment to punishing bad actors and protecting American consumers.”

According to two people with direct knowledge of the Wells Fargo inquiry, career bureau officials took Mr. Trump’s outburst as a green light to pursue aggressive negotiations with the bank, even as Mr. Mulvaney’s team prepared to dial back penalties in other cases or shelve them. Wells Fargo ultimately agreed to a billion-dollar federal settlement, the bureau’s largest-ever civil penalty.

Over time, Mr. Trump has turned Twitter into a means of presidential communication as vital as a statement from the White House press secretary or an Oval Office address. The press secretary has not held a daily on-camera press briefing — a decades-long ritual of presidential messaging — since March. Instead, Mr. Trump’s Twitter activity drives the day.

And Mr. Trump has removed any doubt that his tweets carry the weight once reserved for more formal pronouncements.

In summer 2018, his aides repeatedly tried to reassure Republican lawmakers that the president backed their hard-line immigration bill, despite his remarks suggesting otherwise. But privately, Mr. Trump told several senators that there was only one certain sign of his support.

“If I don’t tweet it,” he said, according to two former senior advisers, “don’t listen to my staff.”

ADAPTING A PLATFORM

When Mr. Trump entered office, aides were determined to rein in his itchy Twitter fingers.

In a series of informal conversations in early 2017, top White House officials discussed the possibility of a 15-minute delay on the president’s account, a technical change not unlike the five-second naughty-word system used by television networks. But, one former senior official said, they quickly abandoned the idea after recognizing the political peril if it leaked to the press — or to their boss.

Several weeks later, a trio of close advisers presented Mr. Trump with another idea. Gary Cohn, the top economic adviser; Hope Hicks, the president’s director of strategic communications; and Rob Porter, his staff secretary, argued that they should see the tweets before he sent them out.

Mr. Trump was skeptical, worrying that delayed tweets would be irrelevant, according to a former White House official. But he agreed to a weeklong trial. Within 72 hours, the president had resumed tweeting from his golf club in Bedminster, N.J.

Three thousand miles away, in Silicon Valley, similar conversations were unfolding at Twitter’s offices, where executives faced the same dilemma as Mr. Trump’s inner circle: whether, and how, to restrain him.

At the time, Twitter lagged far behind larger competitors like Facebook. While popular among politicians and journalists, it was struggling financially. But the president’s incessant tweeting gave the company more currency.

His Twitter account often drove more “impressions” — a key company metric — than any other in the world. But some of his messages seemed to violate the company’s policies against abuse and incitement.

Less than a month into his presidency, Mr. Trump tweeted that Democrats made up Russian interference in the 2016 election to justify Hillary Clinton’s loss. He then accused Mr. Obama of illegally wiretapping Trump Tower during the campaign. Many of the president’s tweets promoted conspiracy theories or tried to erode faith in democratic institutions.

On his sixth day in office, he advanced the false claim that millions of people voted illegally in the 2016 election, depriving him of a popular-vote majority. He has tweeted 40 times about voter fraud and a “rigged” electoral system.

He has since sown doubt about Russian interference and the resulting investigations in more than 1,400 tweets. Mr. Trump has also used Twitter to attack the credibility of journalists, intelligence agencies and the judicial system. He has spoken of a nefarious “deep state” undermining his presidency, a judiciary that puts the country in “peril” and a news media that is “the enemy of the people,” a phrase historically used by autocrats.

The president also pushed unfounded claims that Big Tech is biased against conservatives (102 tweets), stoked fears that caravans of migrants were going to “invade” the United States (43 tweets), and questioned the number of people killed in Puerto Rico as a result of Hurricane Maria (5 tweets). All told, Mr. Trump tweeted conspiratorial language more than 1,700 times.

On a now-defunct internal company message board known as Twitter Buzz, some left-leaning employees favored barring the president. Mr. Trump’s behavior came up at almost every all-hands gathering and at many smaller meetings of executives. Some of them had set their phones to alert them whenever the president tweeted, according to a former employee who spoke on the condition of confidentiality.

“What I saw was a company coming to grips with an entirely new situation, a new level of scrutiny, a new level of vitriol,” said Dianna Colasurdo, a former account executive on Twitter’s political advertising sales team, “and working to adapt their policies in the moment to align with that.”

A turning point came in fall 2017, at the height of tensions with North Korea, when Mr. Trump tweeted that the rogue nation might not “be around much longer!” The country’s foreign minister called that a declaration of war. On Twitter, users wondered if the company would allow Mr. Trump to tweet his way into a nuclear conflict.

The response came the next day. Referring back to Mr. Trump’s online declaration, Twitter announced in a tweet that it took “newsworthiness” into account when evaluating whether to remove a post that violated its policies.

In an interview, Twitter executives said that newsworthiness had long figured into the company’s internal enforcement guidelines and that officials there had been formulating the announcement, which applied worldwide, months before Mr. Trump’s North Korea tweet. But former employees said they understood the announcement to be Trump-driven. Twitter did not want to be in the business of censoring the president.

Late in summer 2018, White House insiders tried again to curb Mr. Trump’s use of social media, according to two former aides. After a series of over-the-top weeks of tweeting — including calling Omarosa Manigault Newman, his onetime aide, “wacky” and “a lowlife” — several advisers suggested he go just two days without Twitter and see what happened. Mr. Trump nodded, and then promptly discarded the advice.

Mr. King, who said most of his Republican colleagues wished the president would tweet less, added that whenever he had raised the issue with White House staff members, they shrugged helplessly.

“It’s not going to stop,” he recalled their saying. “Forget it; we’ve all tried.”

Soon enough, Mr. Trump was as prolific as ever.

On Sept. 13, he mocked Jamie Dimon, the chief executive of JPMorgan Chase, for claiming he could beat Mr. Trump in an election. “He doesn’t have the aptitude or ‘smarts’ & is a poor public speaker & nervous mess,” the president tweeted. Over the next 12 hours, Mr. Trump attacked two former F.B.I. officials, accused The Wall Street Journal of getting a tariff story wrong and blasted former Secretary of State John Kerry for holding “illegal meetings” with Iran.

“BAD!” he wrote.

FIRST THINGS FIRST

Mr. Trump’s Twitter habit is most intense in the morning, when he is in the White House residence, watching Fox News, scrolling through his Twitter mentions and turning the social media platform into what one aide called the “ultimate weapon of mass dissemination.”

Of the attack tweets identified in the Times analysis, nearly half were sent between 6 a.m. and 10 a.m., hours that Mr. Trump spends mostly without advisers present.

After waking early, Mr. Trump typically watches news shows recorded the previous night on his “Super TiVo,” several DVRs connected to a single remote. (The devices are set to record “Lou Dobbs Tonight” on Fox Business Network; “Hannity,” “Tucker Carlson Tonight” and “The Story With Martha MacCallum” on Fox News; and “Anderson Cooper 360” on CNN.)

He takes in those shows, and the “Fox & Friends” morning program, then flings out comments on his iPhone. Then he watches as his tweets reverberate on cable channels and news sites.

The symbiotic relationship between Mr. Trump and Fox News is apparent through the president’s tweets. In fact, he praised the network in his first tweet on the first morning he woke up in the White House. He has since praised and promoted the network, individual shows and conservative news media personalities more than 750 times.

Over all, at least 15 percent of the content in Mr. Trump’s tweets seemed to come directly from Fox News and other conservative media outlets.

Early on Sept. 2 — the start of a week in which he tweeted 198 times — the president sent a few benign tweets, then lashed out at Paul Krugman as a “Failing New York Times columnist” who “never got it!” Over the next 44 minutes, he fired off 10 more tweets. He disparaged Richard Trumka, the president of the A.F.L.-C.I.O. (“Likes what we are doing until the cameras go on.”) He called James B. Comey, the former F.B.I. director, and his “dwindling group of friends” liars and traitors. He railed against The Washington Post and four women of color in Congress who called themselves “the Squad.”

Almost every morning that week, Mr. Trump kicked off the day with an attack on one critic or another: the “incompetent Mayor of London,” or “Bad ‘actress’ Debra The Mess Messing” — whom he accused of being racist — or the “Fake News Media.” He referred to conservative media outlets 45 times, berated the mainstream media 32 times and tweeted about conspiracy theories 12 times.

Sometimes the president’s apparent fury on Twitter is meant to troll his critics and get a rise out of them, many of his closest aides said. But they still brace themselves, knowing that they are likely to be blindsided by one of his tweets. Aides who gather for the early-morning staff meetings in the West Wing said their agenda was regularly blown up when their phones simultaneously went off with a tweet from the boss.

Once Mr. Trump arrives in the West Wing — usually after 10 a.m. — Dan Scavino, the White House social media director, takes control of the Twitter account, tweeting as @realDonaldTrump from his own phone or computer. Mr. Trump rarely tweets in front of others, those close to him say, because he does not like to wear the reading glasses he needs to see the screen.

Instead, the president dictates tweets to Mr. Scavino, who sits in a closet-size room just off the Oval Office until Mr. Trump calls out “Scavino!” Often, he prints out suggested tweets in extra-large fonts for the president to sign off on. (A single-page article that Mr. Scavino recently printed out for him ran to six pages after the fonts were enlarged, according to one person who saw it.)

Mr. Scavino’s role in Mr. Trump’s Twitter machine has made him an unlikely White House power broker and the go-to person for aides, business executives, friends and lawmakers who want the president to tweet something. Ms. Conway noted what she called the hypocrisy of many Republicans who begged her to get Mr. Trump to stop tweeting during the 2016 campaign and now come to Mr. Scavino with suggestions. Mr. Scavino declined to be interviewed for this article.

He sometimes acts as a brake — or tries to — on the president’s tweeting impulses. When Mr. Trump started angrily posting about the “Squad,” Mr. Scavino told him it was a bad idea, according to an aide who witnessed the conversation. Along with Michael Dubke, who served as White House communications director for several months in 2017 and is from Buffalo, home of the famous chicken wings, Mr. Scavino presented some tweets to Mr. Trump in degrees of outrageousness: “hot,” “medium” or “mild.” Mr. Trump, said one former official who saw the proposed messages, always picked the most incendiary ones and often wanted to make them even more provocative.

And while many of Mr. Trump’s tweets are shoot-from-the-hip attacks, he chews over others for days or even weeks, waiting for just the right moment to maximize the reaction, aides say.

He plotted for days to tweet about Mika Brzezinski, the liberal co-host of the popular MSNBC morning program, according to former White House officials, before finally posting one morning in June 2017. He called her “low I.Q. Crazy Mika” and wrote that she had been “bleeding badly from a face-lift” during a New Year’s Eve party.

In October of last year, the president started telling his aides that he planned to denounce Stormy Daniels, a pornographic-film actress who claimed to have had an affair with him more than a decade earlier. He said he wanted to call her a “horse face.”

Several current and former aides recalled telling Mr. Trump that it was a terrible idea and would renew accusations of misogyny against him. But he persisted.

Finally, after watching a Fox News report days later about how a federal judge had thrown out a lawsuit by Ms. Daniels, the president tapped out the tweet.

“Great, now I can go after Horseface and her 3rd rate lawyer in the Great State of Texas,” he wrote.

A LOVE OF ‘LIKES’

For Mr. Trump, Twitter reinforces his instincts about his performance as president.

After a rally in Dallas in mid-October, Mr. Trump’s aides prepared a large-type printout of tweets gushing over his speech that day, including one from Tomi Lahren, a Fox News commentator and the host of a show on the Fox Nation site. Mr. Trump scrawled a thank-you note on one copy to Ms. Lahren — who then tweeted a picture of the letter back at the president.

Aides said they often compiled positive feedback for Mr. Trump. He revels in the stream of praise from his most loyal followers, on paper or as he scrolls through his phone early in the morning and late at night. He considers his following to be like the ratings on a TV show, better than any approval poll. After one weekend Twitter spree, the president told Sarah Huckabee Sanders, his press secretary at the time, he had expected a tweet he was particularly proud of to get more response than it did, according to a former administration official. Ms. Sanders said that if he tweeted 60 times, people wouldn’t pay as much attention, the official said.

TWITTER vs. REALITY

The polling firm YouGov asks Americans to rate Mr. Trump’s tweets every day. Tweets that get the most likes on Twitter tend to be more poorly received by the American public, while those with lower engagement tend to be viewed more positively.

The president is keenly aware of his number of followers and reluctant to acknowledge that any of them are not real. Mr. Trump has accused Twitter of political bias for its periodic purges of bot accounts across the platform, which have cost him — and other prominent users — hundreds of thousands of followers. When he met with the company’s chief executive, Jack Dorsey, in April, Mr. Trump reportedly pressed him at length about the lost followers.

There is plenty of evidence that Mr. Trump’s Twitter following may not be a reliable proxy for what the American people think of the job he is doing.

It is difficult, if not impossible, to determine with certainty how many of Mr. Trump’s more than 66 million followers are fake. Some studies of his followers have estimated that a high proportion are likely to be automated bots, fake accounts or inactive. But even a conservative analysis by The Times found that nearly a third of them, about 22 million, included no biographical information and used the service’s default profile image — two signs the accounts may be rarely used or inactive. Fourteen percent have automatically generated user names, another indication that an account may not belong to a real person.

Even if Mr. Trump is not shouting into the void on Twitter, he is often preaching to the converted. Data from Stirista, an analytics firm, shows that his followers tend to be the kind of users who are most likely to be his supporters — disproportionately older, white and male compared with Twitter users over all.

And they constitute just a fraction of the electorate. According to the Times analysis of Pew data, only about four percent of American adults, or about 11 million people, follow him on Twitter. Those followers represent less that one-fifth of his total, the analysis shows.

According to data from YouGov, which polls about most of the president’s tweets, some of the topics on which Mr. Trump got the most likes and retweets — jabs at the N.F.L., posts about the special counsel’s investigation, unfounded allegations of widespread voter fraud — poll poorly with the general public.

But people close to Mr. Trump said there was no dissuading him that the “likes” a tweet got were evidence that a decision or policy proposal was well received.

Last December, after Mr. Trump announced plans to withdraw some troops from Syria, lawmakers came to the White House to argue against it. According to Politico, Mr. Trump responded by calling in Mr. Scavino.

“Tell them how popular my policy is,” Mr. Trump asked Mr. Scavino, who described for the lawmakers social media postings that had praised Mr. Trump’s decision. Aides said that for Mr. Trump, his Twitter “likes” were proof that he had made the right call.

The reaction in the outside world was far less favorable. Within weeks, Mr. Trump’s defense secretary and the special anti-ISIS envoy quit over the decision. American allies were enraged. More than two-thirds of the Senate voted to rebuke Mr. Trump, who agreed under pressure to keep the troops in Syria.

Almost a year later, American troops in Syria became an issue again after Mr. Trump appeared to give President Recep Tayyip Erdogan of Turkey a green light to invade Kurdish-controlled areas in northern Syria.

That resulted in another congressional rebuke for Mr. Trump and complaints even from loyal Republican allies. In subsequent days, Mr. Trump sought to defend himself on Twitter, alternately denying he had abandoned the Kurds and suggesting the United States had no stake in their safety, threatening Mr. Erdogan if the incursion continued and praising Turkey as an important trading partner.

Many people took note of the back-and-forth, including Mr. Erdogan. “When we take a look at Mr. Trump’s Twitter posts, we can no longer follow them,” the Turkish president told reporters mockingly in mid-October, according to Hurriyet, a Turkish newspaper. “We cannot keep track.”

A TOOL FOR RE-ELECTION

In the months ahead, the man tasked with winning Mr. Trump a second term is hoping to focus the president’s Twitter habit on its original purpose: connecting with voters.

Brad Parscale, who served as Mr. Trump’s digital director in 2016 and is now campaign manager, has worked closely with Mr. Scavino to shape perceptions of the president through social media. The two men speak a half-dozen times a day, according to people familiar with their interactions.

Mr. Parscale criticized Twitter after it announced on Wednesday that it would no longer allow paid political advertising on the platform, calling it “yet another attempt to silence conservatives.” But the change may benefit Mr. Trump: He has a far larger organic Twitter following than any of his likely Democratic opponents, and is therefore less reliant on paid ads to spread his message through the platform.

While some campaign aides say Mr. Trump’s tweets can be a distraction, they also view Twitter as an essential tool to present him as someone strong, willing to stand up to so-called political elites and what the president recently called the “unholy alliance of corrupt Democrat politicians, deep-state bureaucrats and the fake-news media.”

The aides seek to cultivate the image of a man who understands “regular people.” Mr. Trump’s team believes that his unvarnished writing, poor punctuation and increasing profanity on Twitter signals authenticity — a contrast to the polished, vetted, often anodyne social media style of most candidates.

Twitter, Ms. Conway said, is the president’s most potent weapon when it comes to bypassing the powerful people he believes have controlled the flow of information too long.

“It’s the democratization of information,” she said. Everyone receives Mr. Trump’s tweets at once — the stay-at-home mom, the plumber working on the sink, the billionaire executive, the White House correspondent.

“They all hear ‘ping,’” she said, “at the same time.”

______

The New York Times reviewed every tweet and retweet sent by President Trump from Jan. 20, 2017, through Oct. 15, 2019. Each one was evaluated and tagged for several factors: whether it included an attack or praise; who or what was attacked or praised; and for topics including trade, immigration, the military, the economy, the 2018 midterm elections, the Russia investigation and the House impeachment inquiry. In the Times analysis, retweets in each of those categories were counted as tweets.

The Times reviewed each Twitter account that followed Mr. Trump by analyzing profile information, tweet frequency and the date the account was created. The Times also used data from Pew Research to estimate how many American adults follow Mr. Trump on Twitter. Pew Research conducted a nationally representative sample of American adults with personal, public Twitter accounts to analyze how many follow American politicians.

Sources: Trump Twitter Archive, Internet Archive, Politwoops, Census Bureau, Pew Research

Reporting was contributed by Rich Harris, Blacki Migliozzi, Matthew Rosenberg and Rachel Shorey. Produced by Gray Beltran, Rumsey Taylor and Jon Huang. Additional graphics by Guilbert Gates.

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themurphyzone · 5 years

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World’s Greatest Dad Ch 4

Ch 4: Dads and Daughters

“Are you sure you don’t have any Mary McGuffin dolls in the back?” Heinz asked the harried clerk, who was trying to gift wrap an action figure at breakneck speed. Vanessa clung to his leg, refusing to let go. Heinz let her stay there.

If it made her feel better, so be it.

The clerk glared at him. “No! For the last time, we ran out! Either buy some other doll or get out!”

“Yeesh. Great customer service ya got there, lady,” Heinz snapped, making a mental note to add mall employees to his steadily growing list of people to get revenge on. “Is it really that hard to call someone to check for you?”

“Keep it up and I’ll call security to check you outta the mall!”

“That’s it. We’re leaving,” Heinz scowled, leading Vanessa to the exit. She didn’t say anything, though Heinz wished she would just ask for another toy. That would’ve made it so much easier. Then he paused at the doorway. “You better remember the name of Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz, because someday I’ll be your supreme leader!”

A tiny giggle broke through the sniffles.

Despite his annoyance, Heinz couldn’t help but smile. “Didn’t catch that,” he told Vanessa. “I think you’ll have to make that noise again.”

“Dad!” Vanessa whined. Though several tears streamed down her face, she sounded somewhat like herself again.

“Kidding!” Heinz said. “Clean your face in the restroom and let’s get out. They just keep playing the same five Christmas songs on loop, and it’s driving me insane.”

Vanessa hurried into the restroom, never missing an opportunity to assert her independence.

Heinz slumped against the wall, his own childhood disappointment towards a certain toy resurfacing.

Rocks, rocks, and more rocks. In some far off land, maybe claw machines would be filled with smiling, colorful animals and delicious candy. He could always dream.

Pretend the rocks were round candies that tasted of doonkleberries. Pretend that the brown lump was actually a smiling teddy bear that awaited its new owner with outstretched arms and-

Wait a minute.

That was a teddy bear.

Sure it wasn’t smiling, but it was an honest-to-goodness stuffed animal.

Heinz stared in disbelief at it, pinching himself to make sure he wasn’t hallucinating. There was no way. He couldn’t be that lucky.

He waited several minutes, but the bear didn’t disappear.

It had to be real. It just had to be.

Heinz dug around in his pocket, finally coming up with the 3-cent coin that served as his year’s allowance. He slid it into the machine, heart pounding in trepidation as he moved the claw around the perimeter.

Feeling a sudden surge in confidence, Heinz moved the claw above the teddy bear.

He had to get this right. He wouldn’t get another chance.

After adjusting the claw several times so it would be dead center above the teddy bear’s tummy, he was ready. Biting his lip, Heinz pushed the button.

The claw descended.

Heinz leaned against the glass, suddenly not so sure about the angle. Maybe he should’ve put it more to the right?

The claw opened and snatched the teddy bear up. Then it moved above the prize slot, relinquishing the bear to Heinz.

He released a breath he didn’t realize he was holding.

He’d done it! The bear was his!

Heinz pulled the bear out of the slot, relieved that his allowance hadn’t gotten to waste.

His allowance. Mother had given him that coin.

It was only fair that she should get the prize, because he never would’ve gotten the bear without those 3 cents!

He rushed home, keeping a tight hold on the bear so it didn’t get muddy.

Mother and Roger were playing kickball in the front yard. For once, Roger’s presence didn’t damper Heinz’s spirits.

They were floating too high for a little jealousy to reach!

“Mother! Mother!” Heinz yelled. “Look what I got from the claw machine! I won it just for you!”

Heinz stood on his tiptoes, depositing the bear into her arms.

Mother smiled.

Heinz grinned back. She was proud of him, and he didn’t even need to kick a ball correctly! All it took was a stuffed bear!

Now he just needed to figure out where to find more!

Then Mother gave the bear to Roger.

“Thank you very much for the gift, Mother,” Roger chirped.

Heinz became acutely aware of the empty pocket his 3-cent coin used to occupy. He earned that bear.

With his allowance.

Not Roger.

Roger produced a big red marker and scrawled his name on the bear. Mother was so impressed by his penmanship that she asked Roger to write his name on her apron too.

And Heinz could only watch.

The next morning, he woke up to an apron being thrown in his face. Mother demanded that he wash it out in the tub.

And his scribbled message ‘I Love You, From Heinz’ melted away.

“Dad?”

Heinz jolted, realizing that his vision had blurred while flashbacking to his childhood.

“Oh, hey!” Heinz exclaimed, quickly ridding himself of the moisture that had built up. “So you’re ready now?”

Vanessa looked better now. Her face was freshly washed and her nose wasn’t running anymore. “Are you okay?”

“i’m fine. Nothing to worry about. Feeling better now?” Heinz asked.

Vanessa frowned. “A little. Are you sure you’re okay?”

Stubbornness was both a blessing and a curse. Heinz had learned that quickly.

“Yeah, I’m sure,” Heinz said. “C’mon, it’s getting way too stuffy in here and I have a few ideas for evil I’d like to write down before I forget. You’d be surprised how often that happens.” He ushered her out of the mall. Since they both had to concentrate on fighting their way through the hordes of holiday shoppers without getting separated, that left little opportunity for Vanessa to pry further.

The rest of the weekend passed by too quickly for Heinz’s liking after their unsuccessful trip to the mall. Charlene was picking up Vanessa at six in the evening per the routine.

Heinz had broken out the Kleptocracy game board in the hopes of getting Vanessa’s mind off the doll. It seemed to work for a while, but Vanessa lost interest after they’d made six rounds across the board.

“Steal $20 from little Penny Lane’s backpack,” Vanessa read a game card dully. Instead of taking $20 from the bank, she began putting all the game pieces away. “I don’t wanna do this anymore.”

Heinz waved her off. “Eh, it was getting boring anyway. You pick the next activity.” He gathered all the play money, sorting them into the right piles. It took several minutes to get everything to fit into the close to bursting box. “Ugh, why does the cleanup take forever on this thing? They need automatic folding pieces or a mechanical hand cause people have stuff to do.”

“I don’t really feel like doing anything,” Vanessa admitted.

“So, TV then? Maybe there’s a good cartoon on.” Heinz suggested. “You like that Ducky Momo show, right?”

Vanessa wrinkled her nose. “That’s for babies. How come he can never see a bridge right in front of him?”

“Who knows? Maybe they don’t have eye doctors in his universe. Or everyone is affected by a complete lack of depth perception.”

Vanessa giggled at his theory, then her face grew serious again. “Can I try to say sorry by myself to the girl that got mad at me on Monday? I don’t wanna go talk to the teacher with Mom.”

“Don’t worry. I think she’d be glad you’re practicing conflict resolution or whatever they call it these days,” Heinz said, somehow both happy and sad at Vanessa learning to solve her own issues. He glanced at the time, realizing that it would be time to let Vanessa go soon. “Charlene’s gonna be here any minute. You’d better pack up.”

Vanessa went to her room to grab her backpack, and Heinz busied himself by putting Kleptocracy away. He really needed to organize the cabinet by the TV. It was overflowing with games that he’d bought for Vanessa with the alimony he received.

The doorbell rang.

Part of Heinz was tempted to not open the door, to pretend nobody was home in the hopes of Vanessa staying just a tiny bit longer. She was the only person who made his lonely, drafty penthouse feel like a home.

But Charlene loved their daughter too. It was a fact of life.

“So what did you find out?” Charlene asked before Heinz could completely open the door.

“She accidentally upset a classmate and wants to apologize on Monday. Oh, and she doesn’t want you to call a conference,” Heinz explained.

“That’s all?” Charlene raised an eyebrow. “Is there something else you’re not telling me?”

Heinz shrugged. “Look, I’d explain it more in-depth if I could, but I’m still trying to wrap my head around the questions she asked. Besides, I’m totally gonna save the explanation when I have more time to work it into a monologue. This could totally go into a backstory.”

Charlene rolled her eyes at the mention of evil schemes. Now he knew where Vanessa got that habit from.

Five minutes later, Vanessa was ready to go. She clutched her backpack’s straps with both gloved hands as Heinz took his time fussing over her jacket.

“Cover your ears,” Heinz cautioned. “You don’t wanna catch cold. Or dust bunnies. That was possible when I was a kid cause everything was just super dusty all the time.”

“I’m fine,” Vanessa mumbled.

Heinz knelt down to her level, drawing her close for a goodbye hug. “See you in two weeks,” he whispered.

“You’re still gonna be here?” Vanessa asked, her voice tiny.

“Course I will,” Heinz replied. “Someone’s gotta let you eat candy before dinner around here.”

Vanessa giggled, and they finally broke apart.

“Thanks, Dad.”

Heinz smiled back, figuring that a little reminder for Vanessa couldn’t hurt as she grew up and inevitably forgot her innocent request for a doll.

Years later, when Heinz discovered a little doll with a green dress and brown curls at a suburban garage sale, he knew he could finally become the World’s Greatest Dad to his little girl.

#phineas and ferb #world's greatest dad #heinz doofenshmirtz #vanessa doofenshmirtz #fanfiction

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obsidianarchives · 5 years

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To All The Wizards: The Recovery

Zonko’s. They were talking about Zonko’s. Hermione’s nerves were so frazzled, she could barely contain her irritation. It had taken what little reserve of energy she had left to not hex Fred and George the moment they arrived in the hospital wing for selling love potions to minors.

It wasn’t just the twins. While they’d waited to be let in to see Ron, Harry and Ginny were wildly speculating about who could have poisoned him, almost as if it were a game to them. Gryffindors are known for jumping from danger into action, but staring down at Ron’s pale face, it didn’t feel like a game. According to both Harry and Madam Pomfrey, he looked much improved from earlier that day. Even still, seeing him like this filled Hermione with so much guilt she almost couldn’t bear it.

Tears pricked at her eyes as she watched his chest calmly rise and fall. She wondered how many times she had seen him in the hospital wing over the years. How much less scary those times seemed compared to now. Reading the news and watching students leave to be with their families, she knew the gravity of the situation. Bonds were important, now more than ever. Yet, still somehow, she had let the rift in her friendship with Ron expand, for something as trivial as hurt feelings.

Sniffing, she swiped at her nose with her sleeve. The twins were now puzzling with Harry and Ginny as to who could be behind the attack. Laughably, their current prevailing theory was that it might be Slughorn’s doing.

“You said Slughorn had been planning to give that bottle to Dumbledore for Christmas,” Ginny reminded Harry. “So the poisoner could just as easily have been after him.”

“Then the poisoner didn’t know Slughorn very well,” Hermione said, her voice coming out croaky from disuse. It had been hours since she had last spoken to any of them, too wrapped up in her own guilt at being a poor friend to be of much company. “Anyone who knew Slughorn would have known there was a good chance he’d keep something that tasty for himself.”

Before she could continue sharing her thoughts on the likelihood of Katie and Ron’s attacks being connected, Ron spoke. “Er-my-nee.”

It came out in a raspy whisper that they could have almost missed. Hermione’s eyes widened, realizing what he was trying to say. They waited with baited breath for him to say something else. After a moment of muttering, he snored lightly, falling back to sleep. She could feel the group glancing at her, but resolutely she continued to gaze at Ron, refusing to let her expression give way to her confused emotions.

Thankfully, at that moment Hagrid walked in, distracting everyone and pulling Madam Pomfrey from her office. Ron’s face appeared more tranquil now that he had fallen into a more comfortable sleep. He had even regained a bit more color in his cheeks. Gingerly, she touched her own face, expecting to find it burning with the embarrassment she would generally feel, but was now strangely absent. Her skin was cool to the touch, not flushed at all. Taking a deep breath out of habit, she was also surprised to find that there were no nerves to calm. It hadn’t been like that the last time.

—

It had been late in the evening, their first Friday back from summer break when she had found herself squinting at her Ancient Runes homework, trying to work out the advanced text Professor Blathers had assigned. The first week of classes had been harder than any of the other years previous. Hermione wasn’t surprised. This was to be expected, given that it was their first year in N.E.W.T. level courses.

Ron had spent the majority of the night moaning to Hermione about how unfair it was that Harry had weaseled his way out of studying to instead meet with Dumbledore. Periodically, she’d shake her head or roll her eyes from her spot on the floor, but for the most part she sat with her back against the couch, paying him no mind.

He had laid out, sprawled dramatically on the couch in despair, his open Transfiguration book covering his face as he groaned.

“Why do we ever come back from summer holidays? I’ve tried to talk Mum into homeschooling us all.”

“And with what time would she do that?” she asked, looking over her shoulder at him skeptically.

He pulled the book off his face, sighing. Hermione’s eyes had widened, finding herself eye level with the blue-eyed freckle-faced boy, their faces inches apart. The detail of every freckle that sprinkled the bridge of his nose filled her vision. Her eyes had moved to meet his, to find him blinking at her, confused by her sudden demeanor. She whipped around with a squeak. If he noticed, he hadn’t said anything.

“Yeah, I s’pose you’re right. It’s better when it’s just us three. No school work.”

Trying to regain her composure, she scoffed, and without turning around said, “Speak for yourself.”

By the time she had finally translated all of the runes and checked them all for grammar, her back had formed a tight knot from hunching over to look so closely at the pages. She sat up and stretched, yawning as she did so. Looking around, she was surprised to find the common room completely emptied. The clock on the mantelpiece read ten past midnight.

“How strange. Harry still hasn’t come back yet. Do you think we should wait—“ her voice had gotten caught in her throat.

Behind her, she had found Ron, fast asleep, mouth half open, head lolling to the side, towards her, just inches away. Why hadn’t she moved earlier when she had realized how close they were to one another? Instinct told her to turn away, this was too close, but she couldn’t help but look just a little longer.

His red hair fell messily into his eyes, perfectly tousled and perfectly accidental. She felt the impulse to reach out and sweep the hair from his brow, but she resisted. Her breath hitched as he mumbled, shifting slightly away. She imagined what he could be dreaming of—who he could be dreaming of.

She slammed her Ancient Runes textbook shut, heart hammering in her chest. This is creepy, Hermione. Stop, she thought, chastising herself. Turning back around, she shut her eyes tightly, willing the thoughts away, far away. They were friends, nothing more.

“W-wot happen’?” Ron asked groggily, slowly moving to get up, having been woken by the noise.

“I’m headed to bed. It’s past midnight,” she said briskly, gathering up the rest of her things. “You should be off to bed, too.”

He grunted in response, now sitting up, gathering the strength to head to the dormitories.

“Goodnight,” she said lightly, as she headed up the steps.

That night it would be an hour before her thundering heart and racing mind would calm enough to let her fall asleep.

—

Tearing her eyes from Ron, she turned her attention back to the group, ridding herself of her ruminations. Hagrid stood disheveled next to the bed in a puddle of his own making, dripping wet from the rain outside. They were discussing the possibility of the attacks being brought about by a sports rivalry. Both Quidditch Through the Ages and Hogwarts: A History discussed intense Quidditch rivalries throughout Hogwarts’ history, none of which had ever been deadly. Hermione wondered if she truly was the only one who ever read.

The thing the attacks did have in common, however, was that the method would have given someone from outside of Hogwarts access to Professor Dumbledore—first, the attack initiated in Hogsmeade, and now a gift to Professor Slughorn from an unknown source. It could have come from someone who wasn’t a student. This meant it could be any number of Death Eaters.

“It’s not Quidditch. But there is a connection between the attacks,” she said finally, after letting them go on about it for another moment.

“How d’you work that out?” Fred asked.

“For one thing, they both ought to have been fatal and they weren’t, although that was pure luck. And for another, neither item seems to have reached the person who was supposed to be killed.” An internal shiver gripped her as she finished, “Of course, that makes the person behind this even more dangerous, because they don’t seem to care how many people get hurt before they reach their actual victim.”

The group exchanged dark looks as they pondered Hermione’s words. Before anyone could respond, Mr. and Mrs. Weasley returned. Mrs. Weasley made a beeline for Harry, cutting through the tension, enveloping him in a bone-crushing hug. Hermione looked away, uncomfortable for her friend, who she knew found praises for his bravery distressing. Mrs. Weasley was lavishing him with gratitude for saving Ron. Hermione, of course, was grateful to Harry and his having miraculously remembered the bezoar. But she knew better than to tell him that.

Madam Pomfrey came to his rescue, bustling in and tsking as she went. “I think I made it perfectly clear you lot, no more than six guests per patient!”

Harry, Hermione, and Hagrid took the opportunity to bid their leave, allowing the Weasleys more time with Ron.

It ended up being quite late once Harry and Hermione finally approached the corridor leading to the Fat Lady’s portrait. They had a near run-in with Mr. Filch on their way back after stopping to speak with Hagrid, who had he confided that he had seen Dumbledore and Snape arguing.

“I know it’s odd Harry, but Professor Dumbledore is a very capable wizard. Whatever is going on between him and Snape is none of our business,” Hermione insisted as they rounded the corner.

“Fine. Even if Snape isn’t up to something, why would Dumbledore want him to investigate someone in his own House? It has to be Mal—“

“Do you know how often I take points away from Slytherins who think they’re being clever and are going to get away with breaking the rules?” she asked, throwing her hands into the air, exasperatedly. “They’re too cunning for their own good. He could be asking Snape to investigate his House for a myriad of reasons!”

Harry looked at her skeptically but couldn’t argue because, as they turned into Gryffindor Tower, they came across Peeves the Poltergeist. To their displeasure, Peeves was wailing a loud lament:

Prithee Potter, tell me please

What rotten rascal wrecked our King

Won-Won Weasley wanted not

The potente potion he had got

His voice reverberated off the walls, loud and drawn, ringing in their ears. They ran down the final corridor, trying to escape, with Peeves chasing behind.

“Mimbulus mimbletonia!” Hermione shouted at the Fat Lady.

She swung open and they dashed in, panting as the portrait slammed behind them, Peeves’ muffled dirge still sounding from behind.

“Peeves,” Harry said with a growl of frustration. “Reckon it was too much to hope that we could keep the news to ourselves for one evening.”

They walked further into the common room to find it mostly quiet. A murmur of laughter and whispers filled the room as people huddled around their study materials together. One group was playing exploding snap by the fireplace—a normal Saturday night.

“Hmm, it looks like Peeves’ new tune hasn’t spread quite this far. I suppose he must have just heard the news seeing Mr. and Mrs. Weasley leave Professor Dumbledore’s office,” Hermione said intuitively.

Harry acknowledged this to likely be true, exhaling in relief, his shoulders slouched, closing his dark-circled eyes. The exhaustion she saw in him made her feel her own more keenly. With a yawn and a stretch, she bid him goodnight. He nodded wordlessly, patting her on the back as he made his way over to his own dormitory.

The clock in the girl’s dormitory chimed. It was 11 o’clock already. The clouds outside obscured the moon, dousing the room in darkness. Lumos, she thought. Gingerly, she made her way over to her bed, not wanting to disturb anyone. Quickly, she shed her clothes, feeling the weight of the day’s worries come off with them. She slipped into her nightgown and pulled back her hangings.

Pausing, she turned her unseeing eyes to Lavender’s bed. Someone should tell her about Ron. She was Ron’s girlfriend, after all. In the chaos of the day, it hadn’t occurred to any of them to look for her. Hermione grimaced. Lavender really cared for Ron, and everyone seemed to think of her as some sort of joke. The irony wasn’t lost on Hermione that their relationship, as messy as it was, was more legitimate than her own contractual one.

She moved her wand to Lavender’s bed, tiptoeing across the room and wake her. The glow of her wand fell onto the bed and she was surprised to find it empty. Turning around, she found that Parvati’s bed was also empty. Sighing, she flicked her wand, extinguishing the tip and lighting the torches on the wall. She would have to wait for them.

With a flop, she fell on her bed, leaving the hangings open. To her surprise, Crookshanks sprung up to join her. Generally, at this time of night, he’d be strolling about the castle. Noiselessly, he padded over straight to the spot next to her head, and making no significant acknowledgement to her presence, he curled up beside her. She chuckled to herself. He generally preferred his own space.

“What a clever cat you are,” she whispered as she reached up to scratch his back. He must have been able to sense her stress.

Staring up at the canopy of her bed, she felt something Hagrid had mentioned in their conversation on the way back from the hospital wing nag at her.

“Wha’ worries me is how long Hogwarts can stay open if kids are bein’ attacked…next thing yeh know the board o’ governors…”

Surely they couldn’t close the school now. Where else could be safer for Muggle-borns than Hogwarts right now? This was different than the Chamber of Secrets. These attacks were coming from outside, or at the very least were being directed from the outside. Nowhere in Hogwarts: A History did it mention a board of governors, and certainly no entity besides the Headmaster, with such jurisdiction over the running of Hogwarts. Not even the Ministry could easily meddle in the running the school, though it was subsidized. Even then, the Ministry wasn’t made up of people who had bought power and influence to exert over the school.

Lucius Malfoy, while ousted from the board, had more than likely made sure to seat as many like-minded individuals on it as he could in his time. He and his subordinates would love to expel the Muggle-borns and blood traitors from the school. It would make it easier to get to them outside of the castle walls. She shuddered at the thought. If there was anything she hated, it was feeling powerless.

Crookshanks began to purr in his sleep, a comforting sound. She wasn’t powerless, she tried to remind herself. She had a rough idea of a plan if she were to leave. Being of age, she could join the Order. Maybe she could help Dean get his family into hiding if there was time. If anything, leaving now might buy them time, which felt invaluable with so much uncertainty hanging around them.

I wonder if they’d let us take our exams before closing the school, she thought, her mind growing listless. She closed her eyes and smiled, I suppose they could just send them home with us.

Thoughts of practice problems and essay prompts then began to fill her mind, and her exhaustion finally claimed her, lulling her into a dreamless sleep.

—

Things overall were much improved the next day. Sunlight was shining through the castle windows and Ron had woken up. He still felt “a bit peaky” as he put it, but his color had mostly returned and Madam Pomfrey thought he was largely out of the woods. She insisted he stay for a few more days to monitor for any lasting effects while he rested and regained his strength.

Hermione and Harry spent their entire Sunday with Ron, happy to see him returned to his usual self. At first, it felt a little awkward. She and Ron instinctually moved cautiously around each other, not wanting to trigger any past arguments or upsets. Their worry was unnecessary though. As the days passed, they found themselves falling back into their old selves. If anything, they both just seemed relieved to not be fighting anymore.

Dean visited that Sunday, late in the morning. The whole school now knew about Ron’s poisoning. He was waiting for her outside of the hospital wing, his face was grim, taut with concern. Despite his expression, she felt a warmth tickling her stomach, a wide grin spreading across her face. After so much stress, she almost felt relieved to see his friendly face.

“I heard what happened. Are you alright?” he asked, pulling her into a hug.

She froze in surprise at the sincere gesture. The pleasant scent of bergamot filled her nose. Embarrassed, she pushed him away, laughing at his earnestness. “Yes. I’m fine!” She didn’t dare say the truth, which was that she felt great. It was freeing to no longer have to tread lightly around Ron and to have her friend back. And now Dean was here, and that somehow made everything even better.

“Are you sure?” he asked, holding her out at arm’s length, examining her.

She huffed, exasperated. “I’m fine.” The memory of Ron’s “Er-my-nee” entered her mind, but she shook that from her head. “It’s a lot to process. But I’m happy he’s alright.”

Dean looked her over for another moment before deciding for himself that she did in fact look mostly fine.

“Here,” he said, digging in the pockets of his robes. He pulled out two muffins wrapped in a napkin. “I didn’t see you or Harry at breakfast so I nicked these. You need to make sure you come down for lunch and eat.”

She took the muffins, smiling appreciatively, the warm feeling in her stomach filling her whole chest. “Right. I will.”

“So everything going alright with him then?” He indicated at the door.

“Ron? Yes, I think so. I think we’re mostly back to normal, all things considered.”

Strangely, Dean pursed his lips at this. “Are you really going to let him off the hook for how he’s treated you this year?”

She looked at him, shocked. “He was poisoned!”

“Yes,” he said, brushing a stray curl off her shoulder, “but does that excuse his behavior from before?”

Tilting her head, she looked at him for a moment. He wasn’t judging her. By his raised eyebrows, she could tell he was truly asking her. She bit her lip, unsure of how to respond.

“I should go,” he finally said, glancing back at the door.

“Oh! Do you want to come in? I don’t think they’d mind.” It hadn’t occurred to her to invite him in. Would that be weird for Ron? It hadn’t been something she had to navigate since the inception of their scheme, since they hadn’t been on speaking terms.

He shook his head with a slight smile. “Nah, I’m fine. Finish catching up,” he nudged her lightly towards the door. “I’ve got a Charms essay to finish.”

His words stayed with her for the rest of the week. Was she letting Ron off too easy? Their argument didn’t seem that important to her in light of the situation.

They didn’t have time to discuss it any further the rest of the week. Cormac was joining the Quidditch team as an alternate. In preparation for Saturday’s match against Hufflepuff, Harry had booked the Quidditch pitch the entire week whenever there was availability. This meant Dean spent much of his free time with the team at practice. Hermione used this time to catch up on her homework, do her hair, and play with Crookshanks, the two latter of which she had been neglecting. When the team wasn’t at practice, she and Harry were in the hospital wing with Ron.

Their misaligned schedules, for some inexplicable reason, made Hermione sad. Dean didn’t seem upset. To the contrary, they still walked hand-in-hand to classes together and he sketched her more pictures of Crookshanks to cheer her up. He asked about Ron and seemed concerned on her behalf for his well-being. Even though he didn’t seem to be bothered by the time apart, she still couldn’t help but think about him.

Without him or Harry around in her free time, she found friends were light on the ground. The mood in her dormitory had been quite frosty. After falling asleep the night of Ron’s poisoning, she had forgotten all about telling Lavender what had happened. After finding out through the general rumor mill about Ron’s incident, she was rightfully upset. What Hermione felt wasn’t fair was how cold she’d been towards her since then, despite having long since forgiven Harry.

The silver lining about having such a busy week was that the weekend was upon them more quickly than usual. During her free period that Friday, she lugged her book bag up the stairs to the hospital wing. All week, she had taken diligent notes and collected Ron’s assignments, determined that he shouldn’t fall behind in class.

The hospital wing was still mostly empty when she arrived. Ron looked over to her as she entered, his face lighting up at the sight of her. Then his eyes fell on her book bag, bulging at the seams even more than usual, and his face fell.

Without greeting, she set the bag at the foot of his bed and began to pull out folders and stacks of parchment.

“Most people just bring chocolate or some flowers, ya know?”

She pointedly ignored him. “I’ve organized your assignments in these folders. They’re organized by color. And these,” she handed him a large stack of parchment, “are my notes for you to study. I did my best to underline and note important bits. Muggle highlighters don’t work on parchment or else I would—“

He groaned dramatically and threw himself back on the bed, discarding the notes to the side. “Was the poison not punishment enough?”

“Oh stop being dramatic,” she chastised as she sat down.

They sat in silence for a moment, Ron still laying back with his eyes closed.

“How are you feeling?”

“Better. I reckon I could fly tomorrow, but Pomfrey wants me through the weekend,” he said dejectedly without opening his eyes.

“Cormac would be crushed,” she said sarcastically. His eyes flew open, surprised at the joke. They laughed, poking fun at Cormac.

Once they lapsed back into silence, it dawned on Hermione that this was the first time that they’d been alone together in a long time—the first time since the note. She could feel heat threatening to rise to her cheeks.

As if he were practiced in Legilimency, he spoke. “Are we ever going to talk about that note you sent me, Hermione?”

She closed her eyes, hoping that maybe when she opened them she wouldn’t be here. Of course, she knew they wouldn’t be able to avoid the topic forever, but still she had faintly hoped. The familiar feeling of mortification seeped into her skin. Dean wasn’t here to get her out of this one now.

Sighing she opened her eyes, carefully choosing her words. “There isn’t much to talk about. You were never supposed to read it. But it’s fine because it doesn’t matter. I wrote that so long ago, really. Nothing to worry about,” she said in a rush. “Besides, I’m dating Dean now and you’re dating Lavender…” She trailed off, unsure of what else to say, praying he’d drop it.

“Why didn’t you ever tell me?” The emotion in his voice and his searching eyes made her want to disappear. She wondered if a Summoning Charm would work on the Invisibility Cloak. “Maybe I didn’t want to date Lavender.”

He sighed, months of frustration etched on his features. He rubbed his hands over his face, looking conflicted.

Stunned into silence, it took her a moment to collect herself. Surely he couldn’t be suggesting what she thought he was. Instead of the joy or excitement that she would have expected to feel at such a statement, panic filled her. This couldn’t be happening, not now. He wanted to know why she had never told him, but why hadn’t he told her? Why now, when it was too late?

She exhaled, surprised by her own thoughts but finding there was truth in them. It was too late and it had been for weeks now, maybe even months. When had it changed? When had she stopped hoping for this exact outcome? He opened his eyes, looking at her expectantly, in a way that once might have sent butterflies through her stomach.

“You’re one of my best friends. I wrote that note as a silly way to work through my feelings a long time ago. If they were something you needed to be concerned with, I’d tell you,” she said honestly.

His expression clouded over, unreadable. He nodded solemnly, understanding what she meant. At that moment, the hospital wing doors swung open. Turning around, Hermione’s eyes landed on Lavender. Her face screwed into a scowl at the sight of Hermione sitting at Ron’s bedside.

“How long have you been up and what is she doing here?” Lavender asked in an accusatory tone as she strode up to the bed.

Seeing her opportunity to escape, Hermione gathered her things and stood up to leave.

“Wait, Hermione, you can stay,” Ron said, looking at her insistently.

“No, I really ought to be going. I have prefect duty tonight,” she said through a fake smile.

Walking as quickly as she could without breaking out into a full-out run, she left, letting the door shut on the now arguing couple. She clutched her chest, her heart racing, too stunned to move. Blinking, she looked around, her reality feeling changed somehow. She no longer had feelings for Ron. The opposite had been true for so long, the idea of not having feelings for him felt funny in her brain.

But there was no denying it. Her lack of quickened pulse, her lack of warm cheeks, it all pointed to one thing. Her plan had worked, in part anyway. She had distracted herself right out of her heartbreak.

Her hand dropped from her chest, her heart slowing back to a normal pace. If she was over Ron, and Ron understood that the note now meant nothing, that meant the whole scheme with Dean would soon be coming to an end.

To Be Continued…

#To All The Wizards #Hermione Granger #Dean Thomas #Ron Weasley #Hogwarts

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tatooedlaura-blog · 7 years

Text

Fifteenth Christmas

the series is as follows so far:

First … Second … Third … Fourth … Fifth … Fifth Christmas, Part 2 … Sixth … Seventh … Eighth … Ninth … Tenth … Eleventh … Twelfth … Thirteenth … Fourteenth … Fifteenth … Sixteenth … Seventeenth … Eighteenth … Nineteenth … Twentieth … Twenty-first … Twenty-second … Twenty-third

———————–

One look at Mulder had her calling her mother to cancel plans for Christmas Eve and possibly Christmas Day. Maggie took it well, considering now Christmas dinner would be without both Dana and Charlie.

“At least Bill and Tara will be there and Dave and everyone else. You’re even getting Sarah and the kids so maybe pretend Charlie’s just in the bathroom the whole time.” She didn’t get the chuckle she was hoping for but at least she heard a resigned sigh that told her enough, “I’ll call you later when everyone gets there, okay? I love you.”

“I love you, too, honey. Please tell Fox to feel better.”

“I will.”

After hanging up, she moved back to the living room, where Mulder was curled on the couch, blankets piled high, sheen of sweat on his forehead but visibly shivering, chin wobbling, teeth clicking together in rhythmic spasm. Settling on the coffee table after having moved a mountain of computer printouts, magazines and newspapers from around the country, she brushed his forehead, the cold droplets feeling even cooler against his flaming skin, “how are you feeling?”

He couldn’t even come up with some kind of snarky comment, giving her a look of complete agony, “if you could shoot me now, that’d be great.”

Her heart squeezed, wanting to make him feel better but knowing that would only come in the next few days. With a small sigh, she tilted her head, a sad smile curving her lips, “they took my gun, remember?”

Groaning into the damp pillow, “then could you maybe grab me a new pillowcase and a towel? This thing is sticking to my face and feels terrible.”

Tucking in the blankets a little closer, she stood, “back in a minute.”

Soon, darkness had encased the house, the heavy blanket of snow muffling the world, the Christmas lights on the porch railing making the blank white canvas outside alive with color while inside, Scully struggled to get the star atop the tree. Mulder had designated himself ‘starman’ on the first Christmas he’d helped her decorate, given she struggled, needing to retrieve her kitchen stool, nearly falling into the tree reaching over to hang it and while Mulder enjoyed the view of her backside immensely, he declared it would be better for him to do it and her to direct him on balance and crooked issues.

This year, they’d waited longer than usual to get the tree up and now, with Mulder sick, she knew she’d have to do it herself.

All she had to say, in the end, was she was very glad she’d decided to do the star first instead of last. There was a miscalculation in distance and one thing leading to the next had her crashing into and through the tree, branches grabbing at her face and hair, poking her hard in the ribs and chest, digging sharply into her thighs as she landed heavily on the tree stand, metal bending, main trunk snapping, everything banging to the ground.

And Scully’s clear, heavenly voice, to Mulder’s ears anyway, spewing forth swears that echoed off the walls.

Mulder sat up in a shot, tangled in afghans, only to pass out from the sudden movement and his fever.

Through the branches, she watched his stand then fall. Her heart thumping wildly, she flailed, freeing herself from the tree and ignoring the bloody scratches all over her skin to stumble beside Mulder, “Mulder?! Mulder? Are you okay? Did you hurt yourself?”

When he didn’t respond, she slipped into doctoring mode, feeling his forehead, checking his breathing, examining his pupils for reaction. She was confident he’d wake in a minute and scooting to the kitchen to retrieve a wet washcloth and the thermometer, she returned to find him groaning, his limbs shifting haphazardly in ten different directions as he fought to sit up.

“Hey, hey, don’t move. You passed out and I don’t want you doing it again. Stay there for a minute.”

He complied, looking up at her, “did you fall into the tree?”

“Yeah. Apparently, I’m still too damn short to reach the top.”

“When are you going to grow some more?”

Running the cloth over his forehead and cheeks while she held the thermometer in his ear, “January 1st. My New Year’s resolution is to reach a nice 5’5”.” Seeing his temperature up in the 102 degree area, she slid her arm under his shoulder, “come on. I’m taking you to bed.”

“I don’t think I have the strength for sex right now but I could probably just lay there if you want to do the work.”

Shaking her head with a smirk, “still making jokes with a temperature like yours is impressive.”

“Who’s joking?”

Ignoring him now, she helped him sit up and waited while he swayed, then stood him up, working them both towards the stairs and eventually, slowly, up to their room. Settling him under the covers, she pushed his damp hair back, “time for meds and sleep. Back in a minute.”

&&&&&&&&&&

He slept soundly for several hours, giving Scully time to clean up the tree, clean up her numerous wounds, clean up the scattered tissue and other sick Mulder remnants before going to bed herself. Nearly asleep 20 minutes later, she felt his foot hit her calf. Figuring he’d just twitched, she ignored it.

A few seconds later, he hit her again, then his balled fist caught her shoulder. Scooting, sliding, slipping out of bed before she took anymore abuse, she saw him drenched in sweat, legs shifting under the covers, head thrashing about on his pillow.

Mumbling ‘shit’ under her breath, she began her first very long night in many years quieting her partner down, holding compresses to his face, whispering soothing words while she worried beside him. She listened to nonsensical words and mumblings about cases 12 years behind them; heard wild theories about everything from the UPS man spying on them to the possibility that we already colonized Mars but the government refused to tell the public about it.

She knew Mulder as well as she knew herself but that night gave her insight into just how deep his paranoia ran.

By morning, he’d settled down some and exhausted as she was, she attempted, yet again, to get him to drink some water. He was dehydrated at this point, his sweating less, his panting more but when she raised the mug to his mouth, he lashed out, the ceramic shattering as it hit the wall, the water soaking her and the sheets. Knowing she couldn’t leave him alone but that he would need an IV for fluids, she swallowed her pride and the knowledge that when Mulder was well again, he’d probably be thoroughly pissed at her but she called one of the nurses she knew at the hospital, Jenny, and politely asked if the woman could take time out from her Christmas Eve preparations to drop off several bags of saline, some tubing and needles. Explaining about her partner’s severe flu and not being able to leave him, Jenny obliged without hesitation, showing up less than an hour later with the supplies and a sympathetic look on her face.

She stared a moment too long as Scully’s scratched face and hands, however, “Dana, what happened?”

Scully nearly laughed, having sudden visions of Jenny thinking she was in an abuse relationship with a drug addled man who she was withdrawling at home. Ushering the woman off the front porch and inside for a few moments, she gestured to the pile of misshapen artificial tree sitting inside the door, Scully not having been able to get it outside to the garage in the snow, “Fox usually does the star on the tree but since he’s ill, I tried and I’m really too short to do it and I fell right through the tree and scratched myself and well,” glancing down at the metal and plastic heap, “that’s my Christmas tree this year.”

Understanding, Jenny returned to her sympathetic face, “I’m sorry. Your Christmas doesn’t seem to be shaping up well this year.”

With a moment of dawning, she gave her colleague a smile, “it’s okay. I have my Fox and that’s all I need, Christmas or any other time of the year.”

Turning to go, she gave Scully a grin, “glad you feel that way but if I tried to get away without a tree at my house, my kids would tie me up and decorate me with the lights and the tinsel and leave me there for the duration of the holidays.”

With a chuckle, she wished the woman ‘Merry Christmas’ and thanked her again before closing out the cold of the brisk afternoon and heading back upstairs, hoping Mulder hadn’t hurt himself in the few minutes she was gone.

&&&&&&&&

In the middle of the night, Scully, dozing beside him, woke when he began mumbling, hands and feet shifting under the covers, not harshly as before but slow and soft, brushing her arms, legs, knuckles running into her cheek, stopping their pursuit of her once they found their destination. Thinking he was waking up, his fever broken, she froze in utter terror when he opened his eyes to look at her, his head turned, his voice an urgent whisper, “they’re here!”

Scrambling backwards and out of bed in a daze, he tried to follow her, the saline bag she’d rigged to hang from the headboard swinging, then dropping to the bed as he moved. The calm, rational look in his eye made her heart thud heavy, erratic as she wondered how she would get him to the car and on the road, drive to one of the sheltered stashes compliments of the Gunmen that she hadn’t thought about in years.

She would have bet hard money he was awake.

“Mulder?! Mulder? Who’s here?”

Kneeling on the sea of tangled sheets and quilt, he stared hard at her, forehead scrunched in confusion, “they are. They all are. They’re behind the doors and in the closet and coming in the front door right now. Can’t you hear them? They’re breathing through their masks and they’re rattling.” Leaning even more towards her, “they rattle. Our atmosphere is too thick for them but the masks let them move around.” Pointing behind him, he twisted his arm far enough that the tape pulled, the IV slid from his vein and saline began shooting from the tube while blood began running down his arm.

He didn’t seem to notice however and when Scully automatically moved forward, wanting to calm him down but seemingly moving too fast, Mulder grabbed her arms, a triumphant look on his face as he turned his face towards the door, yelling, “Scully!! Scully!! Come here! I got one! He was fast but I got one! Come see him!”

Near tears, all she could do was wiggle her hand until it could press over his leaking cut, putting pressure on it, feeling the blood, from the tension in his muscles, pouring out faster than it normally would. “Mulder? Mulder, I’m right here. It’s me. I’m right here. You have me. You didn’t catch one of them … you have me. Mulder, it’s me.”

She repeated, slowly and quietly, his name, her name, over and over, the syllables becoming a nonsensical stream of sound as she spoke, her brain racking on what else, anything else she could do. He kept yelling over her thought, becoming more and more agitated as he called her name, demanding she come upstairs to see what he had.

Minutes, seconds, hours, decades, moments later, her mouth dry, his voice nearly gone from yelling, she decided she would have to take him down like a suspect, treat him like a common criminal with a kick and a back twist of his arm, unless he responded to one last ditch effort.

“You’re scaring William, Mulder. He’s asleep in the next room and he’s going to wake up. He’s going to hear you and he’s going to be afraid. You need to let me go and be quiet.” Now the tears were pouring down her cheeks, “Mulder, you don’t want to scare William. He’s your son, Mulder, you can’t scare him like this. Mulder, please?”

Something in the name William seeped through the chaos, the scattered remains of Mulder’s sanity and managing to break through, she saw recognition on his face for a split second and knowing she nearly had him back, “Mulder, I need you to lie down, okay? You had a nightmare and pulled out your IV and you need to lay down so I can take care of you? Do you understand, Mulder?”

His fevered mind finally clicked over, “Scully?”

Nearly collapsing against him, she held strong, even as her heart continued to tear at having mentioned her son’s name out loud so many times in such a short span, “it’s me. Can you lie down, please?”

He obliged without argument, his eyes searching hers but finding only despairing fear, he grew scared, “what did I do?”

&&&&&&&&

He insisted she not sleep in bed with him. He insisted she shut and lock the bedroom door with him inside. He insisted that she go to her mother’s and leave him behind, let him damage himself instead of her.

She told him to ‘shut up’ in the politest voice she had, then called the pharmacy with a prescription for something to help him sleep deeper, dreamlessly, as well as something stronger to combat the fever. She reinserted the IV after he threw up the small amount of water she gave him to drink, changed the soaked sheets, re-fluffed his pillow, stroked his forehead and told him it would take her 20 minutes, there and back, to the drug store and she’d need to leave him alone in that time.

She asked him to try to stay awake for her, just so he wouldn’t have another nightmare while she was gone and he nodded his glassy, fevered eyes in her direction, asking for his Rubik’s Cube from the dresser, “if I try that, I might stay awake.”

Leaving him, she made it to the car before she broke, 11:52pm, nearly Christmas Day and she wasn’t wrapping gifts and cuddling by the tree but speeding into the night, thanking God over and over in a constant mumble of appreciation that she found a drugstore open when the rest of the world was shut up tight for the holiday.

Swiping at her cheeks every few minutes, she made it there and home in 1020 seconds, having counted each and every one of them in turn, finally running up the stairs to find Mulder’s toy fallen to the mattress but no Mulder. Panic flooded her until she heard his low groan from the bathroom, his unmistakable ‘I’ve just thrown up all my organs’ sound that had her pushing the door open slowly, medicine in hand, “Mulder?”

He was still hugging the toilet, back curled as his muscles tensed, the sound guttural as nothing came up but not for lack of trying. She could only run her hand over his chilled skin, offering him palpable comfort when words would mean nothing, waiting until he finally sat back on his heels, IV trailing down to the liquid bag on the floor, “ready to go back to bed?”

“Can’t you just leave me here? I can sleep on the bathmat.”

Arm under his, she helped him up, “come on. I’ve got something to help the fever and calm your stomach down. If it works, then I have something that’ll get you to sleep but you won’t dream.”

Looking at her as if she were an angel, “they make things like that?”

“Yeah, they do.” Moving the hair sweat-plastered to his forehead and with a look of complete and utter sympathy, “but since you’re not keeping anything down, I’m going to have to do this a different way.”

Mulder groaned then rolled to his side, “the things you’d never thought you’d be doing to me when you walked in that basement office.”

As she pulled out the pill bottles and a pair of rubber gloves, “I loved you pretty much from the first day so even though I may have never thought about having to do this, I would have still done it in a heartbeat if it would have made you feel better.”

“Suppositories: Bringing together lovelorn FBI agents since 1993.”

&&&&&&&&&&

He didn’t throw up again, managing to keep down water and Pedialyte an hour later. His fever was hovering around 100 by the morning and having refused the sleeping pills, he drifted off on his own, Scully quietly lying beside him, hand on his chest, fingers on his carotid artery, soothed by the now steady, thrumming heartbeat of one finally on the slow mend.

They slept through the day, Mulder only getting up twice, once to pee and responding to a text Scully had received from Maggie, the second to retrieve her unwrapped ornament from his sock drawer. Exhausted, he debated for half a second whether to find some Christmas paper to wrap it up then climbed back into bed, instead hanging the ornament where the galaxy usually spun, putting the older ornament carefully in the nightstand drawer, just in case he went all hallucinatory again and managed to break it.

&&&&&&&&&&

She woke him up with a kiss to the cheek originally intended to check his temperature but he felt her, recognized her, moved towards her unconsciously, breathing her in, “hi.”

“Hi. How are you feeling?”

“Like someone beat me with some rebar, then ran me over with a steamshovel.”

“Oddly, I can imagine what that feels like.” Scooting a little closer, she also ran her lips over his forehead, “you seem much cooler than earlier.”

“The buzzing’s gone and my head isn’t throbbing like it was.” Drinking in her still sleepy blue eyes, “Merry Christmas.”

One side of her mouth curved up, lips pale in lingering exhaustion, “Merry Christmas. I’m glad you feel better.”

Whispering across the inches to her, “I love you and you have no idea how sorry I am for whatever I did. I don’t remember much but what I do remember makes me feel terrible and I’m sorry.”

Warm hand stroking down his cool cheek, “I love you, too. Don’t apologize. You can’t control your fever and what it makes you do.”

“I’m still sorry.” Leaving it at that, not wanting, at this point, to know what else he said or did, he moved his hand, pointing up to the headboard, “look at what Santa left you.”

Moving her head, she took in a dark matte-finished, round ornament, exquisitely painted with their house, trees, hammock, crooked front step, sagging roof painstakingly included down to the tiniest of details. Breathing out, tears prickled, threatened to fall but she held them in, smiling at the beauty, “I love it, Mulder. How did you do that?”

“Actually, I was talking to your mom about something or other a few months back and she mentioned she had a friend who paints and one thing led to another.” Reaching up to take it down for her to look at more closely, “Maggie had her ship it here and it came a few weeks back but I never got around to wrapping it so I decided to give it to you like this.”

In examining it, it suddenly blurred before her just as her head began swimming, spinning, pulsing. Having enough sense, she shut her eyes, handing the fragile glass back to Mulder, “I love it but I’m suddenly very dizzy. Did yours start like that?”

Rolling away and putting the ornament in the drawer with the first one, “yeah, it did.” Standing, he waited for a moment, then turned to her, “why don’t you get your pajamas on and get comfortable. It’s going to be an ugly few days.”

&&&&&&&&&

Mulder felt well enough to take care of Scully and by the 28th, they were wrapped up in blankets on the couch, enjoying their fireplace and hot chocolate and the fact that while Scully slept her fever away, Mulder had decorated. He’d taken the demolished tree parts and lined the mantle, placing other branches behind pictures, in the curtain rods of the windows. He then used their entire collection of stick-on hooks to hang all the ornaments on the large wall of the room, staggering them, arranging them in the most aesthetically pleasing pattern he could achieve, each one dangling from red and green yarn he’d rescued from his knitting bag.

Dozing against him, warm and wonderful, she mumbled into the darkened room around them, “thank you for taking care of me.”

As he kissed the top of her head, leaving his lips against her hair, “thank you for taking care of me.”

“And you like your ornament?”

“Of course. How could I not like a miniature ‘Big Blue’ hanging from my Christmas tree? I’m still amazed you remembered and managed to get them to send you one.”

“I remember everything Mulder, even the mythical sea monsters.”

Kissing her once again, “Merry Christmas, Scully.”

Through half a snore, “Merry Christmas, Mulder.”

#msr #sickness abounds #home for christmas #my writing #christmas series #xf fanfic #xfiles fanfic

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roedmalone7-blog · 5 years

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douchebagbrainwaves · 5 years

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WORK ETHIC AND POINTS

As computers have grown more powerful, the new languages being developed have been moving steadily toward the Lisp model. I spent almost a decade investing in early stage startups, and curiously enough protecting yourself against obsolete beliefs? Their reporters do go out and find their own stories, at least, there is only one kind of success: they're either going to be more politics, and less scope for individual decisions. One thing we can track precisely is how well the startups in each batch do at fundraising after Demo Day, it would be an amazing hack. Lewis in The Boston Globe. The electronic parts distributors are trying to squash them to keep their monopoly pricing. And she too knows the creative director of GQ. It was the usual story: he'd drop out if it looked like the startup was taking off. The PR industry has too. We'd have to be disciplined about not letting your hypotheses harden into anything more. Few investors understand the cost that raising money from them imposes on startups.

We got one paper to print this number, which seemed neutral enough. If this were true, Yahoo would be first in line to buy Suns; but when I worked there, the servers were all Intel boxes running FreeBSD. You can see that from how randomly some of the most promising startups, that series A investors often make companies take more money than they want. After all, they know good PR firms won't lie to them. When we were visiting Yahoo to talk about being acquired, we had to interrupt everything and borrow one of their conference rooms to talk down an investor who was about to back out of a new funding round we needed to buy time to fix it. After publishing his theory of colors in 1672 he found himself distracted by disputes for years, finally concluding that the only solution was to stop publishing: I see I have made myself a slave to Philosophy, but if I get free of Mr Linus's business I will resolutely bid adew to it eternally, excepting what I do for my privat satisfaction or leave to come out after me. Really good languages aren't like that.

If Lisp is so great, why don't more people use it? We'll see multiple companies doing the same thing at the same time. Suits, who don't know one language from another, but know that they keep hearing about Java in the press; programmers at big companies, who are amazed to find that there is now a whole neighborhood of them in San Francisco. And in this context, low-cost investors to undercut the rest. There's a rule of thumb in the VC business. We managed to get press hits in almost every publication we wanted, but we never managed to crack the print edition of the Times. But those are the wrong eyes to look through! I'd been able to think about what I wanted. They cut off all the crap the manufacturer had bolted onto the car to make it look like a car was supposed to look. But once this fact was out there in print, we could have monotonically increasing confidence in their opinions are implicitly concluding the world is static. Because PR firms tell them to.

Meanwhile, the one thing you can measure is dangerously misleading. The first stories about Jaynes cited this source, but now it's simply repeated as if it were part of the indictment. What topic do your thoughts keep returning to? There are two big forces driving change in startup funding: it's becoming cheaper to start a consulting company, or a niche product company, but it should be helpful to anyone who wants to understand the essence of Lisp—both in the sense of its origins and its semantic core. Others say I will get in trouble for appearing to be writing about things I don't understand. Who knows, maybe VCs will make more money by doing the right thing. They're smart; they're working in a promising field; and they just cannot give up. Their chances of succeeding that matter but their chances of succeeding that matter but their chances of succeeding that matter but their chances of succeeding really big. You can see that from how randomly some of the time. Hackers don't like a language that talks down to them. It would be up to our chins in failure all the time.

It was natural to have this distinction in Fortran because not surprisingly in a language where the input format was punched cards the language was line-oriented. 1 racecar, not a sedan with giant rims and a fake spoiler bolted to the trunk. More often than not the energy they expend on seeming impressive makes their actual performance worse. Some VCs lie and claim the company really needs that much. He showed how, given a handful of simple operators and a notation for functions, you can no longer claim to have invented a new language, but only to have designed a new dialect of Lisp;-Though useful to present-day publishers work hard to make the cover something you can tell a book by its cover originated in the times when books were sold in plain cardboard covers, to be bound by each purchaser according to his own taste. I'm certain it isn't. So I'll tell you now: bad shit is coming. The Detroit News. I've never heard anyone say that they loved Java. One forgets it's owned by a private company.

That kind of change, from 2 paths to 3, is the sort of people will make them. Would even Grisham claim that it's because he's a better writer? But don't sit around doing nothing. What does that mean for investors? The electronic parts distributors are trying to squash them to keep their monopoly pricing. Within Y Combinator, I remembered. These two seem points of high ground, with swampy lowlands between them. It may seem cavalier to dismiss a language before you've even tried writing programs in it.

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smireyac · 5 years

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yea boi u already kno what it issssss 🍾🎆🎉🍾🎆🎉

hey so i started writing this at 8 o’ clock so i would be ahead of the game and actually have more than an hour to write but HEY its already 20 after midnight so who the eff care amiright ladies

WOOOOO 🍾🍾🎆 🎉 🎆 🍾 🎉 🎉 🍾 🍾 🍾 🎆🎆 🎆 🎉 🎆 🎉🍾 🎉 🍾🎆 🎉

so.................... its 2019.....................

i watched vox’s “2018 in 5 minutes” video and cried so thats how this year has been :^) a lot of lows......... we always think we leave the shittiest year behind then lo.............. the next year rears its ugly head and we never learn............ despite this, im gonna try to keep a positive outlook on the new year......... its literally just another day and i have to be in at work @ 9 tmrw but its what ever im already super fucking tired whats losing another hour of sleep anywahy?? its practically expected of me any way what with being a youth,,, ANYWAY i spent my time ringing in the new year watching spiderman homecoming so i think that wa sGREAt its also great that im gonna get to see spiderverse AGAIN tmrw after work so SUCK ON THAT im ringing in the new year RIGHT!! its a very spidey new year and i wouldnt have it any other way heh.....

alright

so its time.... to reflect...........

and actually reflect this time last year was weak sauce compared to the first year “im too unfocused right now happy new year or whatever” *scoffs* what r u too good for self reflecting now a days huhh

been doing a lot of self reflecting this year,,,,,, but today we will look back on how the previous years have gotten me to where i am today...

if 2016 was the year of change and 2017 was the year of getting used to things.............. 2018 felt like............ the year of getting TOO used to things, of not ENOUGH change............. like alright i scratched a few of the bigger things on my yearly “to do” list/resolutions, i. e. finally going back to school and getting a job at the library, but like.......... i definitly dont feel like i did enough........... my art game was SO WEAK and i feel like i wrote less than 10,000 words ALL YEAR (not counting my academic papers) i didnt really CREATE anything this i dont have ANYTHING significant to show for this year............and to get more negative i didnt even make any friends all year NONE FRIENDS im only *just* starting to get more friendly with people at the library thank GOD theyre nice and gave my shy ass a chance to open up but i still dont feel like ill make FRIEND friends theyre just work friends and u kno what thats making me so pissed bc its tricking my dumb ass into thinking i have a crush on someone at work aND that i want a *romantic* relationship with them!!! OUTRAGEOUS im so peeved.......................... i also still havent gotten behind a wheel but at this point im not sure if i will anytime soon bc im That Way..... grrrr im just mad thinking of all the things i didnt do so motherfucker i will make 2019 the year of DOING!!!! and i had so many resolutions last year i feel like the more i had the less i felt like i had to do them, like i was just saying all that to be like “oh wouldnt it be nice if any of these things happened lmao” so yeah 2019: the year of DOING... and since ive kinda sorta figured out that writing is my thang.... i think i wanna focus on doing that.. and anything that will help me do it

SO: #GOALS for 2K19

-WRITE AT LEAST 50.000 WORDS U COWARD, more than just “brainstorming” too bc thats like a cop out, write like stories or dialogue or scenes or scripts or WHATEVER just make it to 50,000 pls some people do that in like a month

-READ UR GOD DAMN BOOKS, u *cant* buy anymore if u dont read the ones u’ve already bought,,,, im willing to make an acception re: checking things out from the library................ but u rlly shouldnt IT WOULD’VE BEEN SO EASY TO WIN THE BET DUDE srsly..... maybe .... an hour b4 bed ? try to read ? at least try to read once a week dude....

-heres a curve ball WATCH MORE MOVIES !!! u say u love film well fuckin act like u do...... u only went to the movie theater 5 times all year and three of those were all in the last month to go see spiderverse, more than that HOW MANY movies are there on netflix that u see and go “oh i should watch that finally” or “people say thats rlly good bro” and u scroll right past to watch the same 3 fuckin movies i s2g

-oh yeah back to the writing thing, to reach that 50,000 goal u should write about what you read and watch, there u’ll prob meet the goal b4 summer if u do that bro but....u actually gotta do it....................

ok those r the 4 im REALLY gonna work on and try to keep track of in either of the journals sien got me :^) these next few i rlly want to happen but..... we’ll see

-make some friends pls.... pls be more friendly......... ENGAGE people when u have the opportunity askQUESTIONS about them like if they have a dog or a hobbie jesus h christ

-go out..... on ur own..... do stuff............by urself if u have to... go to the movies by urself go to a park, walk around down town for the fuck of it idk DO STUFF

-finish something............ for once in ur miserable life...................................... finish the vlog or the scrapbook..... or the reading list or this set of goals PLEAsE ANYTHING

im not even gonna put draw/art blog related stuff on here bc........ its not what i want........ like i love drawing and i dont think im terrible at it, im at a good place with it but i dont wanna put my energy this year into drawing stuff for the sake of me being able to say “i did it” like...... last yr and the yr b4 i rlly RLLY wanted to get better at art to idk prove that i could?? but like i havent picked up my drawing tablet in months ... that makes me really sad but i dont really feel like picking it up either? ? i said i wanted to take a painting/color theory/ life drawing class maybe i will this yr and it’ll reinvigorate my love of drawing........ tbh spiderverse got me *this close* to being pumped about art and animation and like yeah i still am, i love the medium and its still a dream of mine to be apart of it but it feels like a pipe dream if i try to go thru the art angle........ so many people r better than me at that and its not really what i wanna do,,, i wanna CREATE STORIES and worlds and characters and like i used my art to help *me* develop those but... i dont wanna use my art to do it for someone else i guess............. the art of animation itself still facsinates me so they door isnt close yet but,,, i wanna focus on the other aspect of myself that im more and at the same time LESS confident about lmao WRITING like alright,,, i think im a good writer .... sorta ? like yeah people tell me i am and sometimes when i look back on things ive written im like “dAMN i wrote this ???” but like,,,, there are some things to writing that still. escape me... like poetry.... and a lot of other aspects to it that i cant describe write now bc it would take too long and im getting cold and tired SO YEAH hopefully this english class will help me, even tho its just writting for college essays, i need to start somewhere and if shes rlly as good of a professor as rate my professor says then ill learn smthg new

where was i

well the year wasnt ALL bad, like i said i got the job at the library i wanted and FINALLY got to go to school, stressful as that mightve been........ and i got to see my love, my darling, the light of my life rhys again for one glorious week,, hopefully ill be able to see more of my friends this year? either in miami or milwuakee idc which MAYBE BOTH lmao im not that rich but hey i can dream,,,

alright its 1:12am i think im ready to sign off,,,,,,,,, here’s to DOING in 2019

🥂 cheers

#omg i talk #happy new year

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matt41john · 7 years

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20 Best Master’s in Educational Leadership Degrees for 2017

Education is the soul of society, and those charged with its care have an inestimable responsibility. In our nation, those invested in educational leadership, the shaping of the next generation, includes principals, superintendents, assistant principals, academic deans, instructional coaches, and directors of curriculum and instruction. These administrators provide educational, curricular, and financial leadership, as well as ensure the smooth day-to-day operations of our schools.

These administrators are 12-month employees, as compared to teachers who get a break in the summer, which means they work long hours and spend summers preparing for the next school year. Despite the substantial workload that comes with the role, the career ranks among the top 12 underrated jobs, according to a survey by CareerCast, a careers website. The satisfaction of year-round hard work can be very fulfilling, but even more, the success of the young people that come and go through the school you lead.

What is required to earn a master’s degree in educational leadership?

There is a lot of variation in educational leadership degrees. While they are all graduate degrees, the title changes from Educational Leadership to Educational Administration, with numerous titles in between. Not all educational leadership degrees end in principal licensure, though; to gain principal licensure, more education is required, although a few of the programs on the list provide the option to continue to the principalship or combine the program with the master’s degree. Many educational leadership programs are offered entirely online with the working professional in mind, but some schools may require campus visits. Additionally, candidates are usually required to have field experiences in a school setting.

Courses are designed to prepare educators for the immense responsibilities of leading a school. Classes include on teacher leadership and development, practical instruction, school improvement, school law and finance, and curriculum and instruction. Most degrees require approximately 30+ hours of coursework.

What is the job outlook and salary for a job in educational leadership?

Employment growth for school principals is expected to increase 10 percent by 2020, about as fast as the national average of 14 percent for all occupations. But because hiring demand ties to student enrollment, employment growth may vary by region, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics.

Median salaries range from about $67,000 for assistant principals to $88,000 for high school principals, according to PayScale.com. Consider the following:

Assistant Principal – $73,500

School Superintendant – $104,500

Department Chair – $84,640

Elementary School Principal – $80,107

What is your methodology for creating the 20 Best Masters in Educational Leadership?

There were numerous factors included to form this ranking. The first was a score from U.S. News and World Report Best Graduate Education Schools as well as the overall school’s score. The cost per credit factors as 30 percent of the overall score. Additionally, the percentage of faculty who were tenured or on track for tenure, the endowment per student, and annual return on investment were considered. The information gleaned is from the National Center for Education Statistics as well as Payscale.com.

We researched the particular program at each school to provide you with the most up to date information about the school and the opportunities that exist in each school. Unique factors were considered such as courses, field experience, and estimated time to complete the degree, as we strive to offer relevant information that leads to you, the student, making an informed decision.

Best wishes on your journey!

1. University of Florida

A senior member of the University of Florida System, incredible research, outstanding athletics, and unbelievable academic and student life options is the University of Florida. With approximately 37,000 undergraduates and 16,000 graduate students, it may come as a surprise that 56 percent graduate with no student loan debt. Additionally, more than 3,400 young people engage in UF’s honor’s program.

There are both on-campus and online options for educational leadership at UF. There MEd in Educational Leadership with or without certification on-campus and a MEd in EL which leads to Florida Principal Certification offered 100 percent online. Whether you choose an on-campus or online degree, rest assured that UF’s College of Education is the highest ranked in the state, and receives top rankings for many of their programs. The EL Program features courses that shape confident, well-spoken, and knowledge administrators and teacher leaders. Courses include Data-Driven Decision Making, Public School Law, Technology Leadership, and the capstone, Supervised Practice in School Administration. There is also a thesis or comprehensive exam for the MEd (certification or non-certification). The licensure track includes Florida’s examination for administrative certification.

U.S. News and World Report’s ranking for Best Graduate Education Schools has UF at #29 and the overall score at 62. Tuition is $856 per credit with an incredible 9.5 percent annual ROI. A definite advantage of a large school, the endowment per student is $32,011.

2. Baruch College

Every student of the 18,000 that attend the City University of New York Bernard M. Baruch College leaves changed. Located in the Gramercy Park section of Manhattan, New York City, Baruch is diverse, in fact, more than 130 languages are spoken on campus, and 168 countries are represented. This dynamic interchange of cultural diversity shows up in the active student life and academics with more than 80 undergraduate and graduate options.

At Baruch, the MEd in Educational Leadership (MSEd-EL) is designed for those interested in assuming positions of influence in elementary or secondary education in urban settings. The MSEd-EL program is 33 credits, but after the initial core of 24, you are eligible to apply for the School Building Leadership (SBL) certificate mandated by the State of New York to become an assistant principal or principal. If you complete an additional 15 for a total of 39, you can apply for a School District Leader certificate. Coursework includes measurement in schools, legal issues in education, community relations, instructional leadership, urban school problems, and more. There is a capstone project that involves the design and research of a particularly relevant issue in leadership. A 600-hour internship is also required rounding out robust theory and application.

The incredible 94 percent tenured faculty and U.S. News and World Report rankings of #170 and 69 for Best Graduate Education and overall score respectively highlight the quality of Baruch. Financially the $780 per credit is reasonable, especially when looked at in the light of the 8.9 percent annual ROI.

3. University of Washington

The University of Washington in Seattle, Washington is a large, public, research university. UW also has campuses in Tacoma and Bothell, as well as a world-class academic medical center. Being founded in 1861 makes UW one of the oldest institutions of higher learning in the West and gives it an edge in the experience factor. UW is known for raucous football games, incredible academics choice and quality, and innovation – bubblegum, vinyl, and the color TV tube were invented on campus.

With the “ultimate goal of creating powerful and equitable outcomes for all students” and “renewal in our schools,” UW offers six MEd options in Educational Leadership, three of which are: Danforth Educational Leadership Program, Leadership in Higher Education, and Intercollegiate Athletic Leadership. These options will work if you are interested in leadership positions in schools, districts, colleges, and nonprofits. The Danforth Educational Leadership Program is a one-year certification (36 credits) with a MEd option (nine additional credits for 45 total) that is competency-based and field intensive. In fact, you experience a 1,000-hour internship with integrated coursework. This in only one of the top-rated degrees at a school that provides excellent support and delivers quality instruction.

Ranked #9 by U.S. News and World Report for Best Graduate Education Schools and with our highest endowment per student on the list at $60,523, UW offers much; however, the tuition is at $1405, on the upper end, though offset by a 9.3 annual ROI.

4. Iowa State University

Iowa State University in Ames, Ohio is a leader in research and innovation. Founded in 1858 it is one of the first land-grant universities in the nation. ISU is burgeoning with over 35,000 students, 800 student organizations, 100 bachelor’s, 112 master’s, and 83 doctoral programs. With the pride of being the place where the world’s highest resolution immersive virtual reality lab is to the largest concentration of faculty involved in sustainable agriculture teaching and research, ISU is only getting better.

The Pre-LEAD Program at ISU is for those seeking a MEd or MS in Educational Administration and principal certification. The program is 36 credits and includes a 400-hour internship at the elementary, middle, and high school levels. The degree is delivered in a face-to-face or hybrid online model maximizing the options for those who work or can’t travel as often. Courses include Principles of Educational Administration, Supervision for Learning Environments, Diverse Learning Needs, and Curriculum Leadership to name a few. The MEd option requires a portfolio and the MS a thesis. For admission to the Pre-LEAD Program, GRE scores are not necessary.

When looking as some specific data-points, ISU emerges as our #4. The University scored 45/100 overall by U.S. News and World Report. Knowing the caliber of education helps for sure, but even better is financial short and long-term assurance. With the best annual ROI on our list with a 9.8 percent and tuition at $849 per credit, ISU fits the bill.

5. McDaniel College

McDaniel is different. Recognized in Loren Popes book Colleges that Change Lives, McDaniel College in Westminster, Maryland is a selective and private university that offers an individualized education with an emphasis on the liberal arts. Students experience a 4-1-4 schedule with the January mini-mester featuring uncommon courses. The 1600 students at McDaniel can also enjoy the European campus in Budapest, Hungary as well as the 160-acre main campus. McDaniel offers study abroad options and self-designed majors as well.

McDaniel’s MS in Educational Leadership is ideally suited for teachers who want to be leaders, particularly a principal. Based on standards developed by the Educational Leadership Constituent Council (ELCC), NCATE and the Maryland State Department of Education, the degree leads to licensure and confidence on day one. The MS in Education Leadership is delivered hybrid, face-to-face, or online formats, right in step with MC’s individualized model. Courses include Economics and Financing of Education, the Role of the Principal, School Leadership in the Twenty-first Century, Supervision and Evaluation of School Personnel, and culminate in the portfolio that includes a research paper and interview; for certification, an additional internship is required. The program is 34 credits.

Scored 47/100 by U.S. News and World Report, McDaniel’s reputation for excellence is supported. In addition to this recognition, McDaniel has one of the best financial packages: a $490 tuition makes it #1 in terms of affordability on this list, and an endowment per student at $46,076.

6. Minnesota State University-Mankato

Founded in 1868, Minnesota State University began, like many of our universities as a school to train teachers. Today, MSU enrolls 15,000 students who study 200 undergraduate and graduate programs. The School boasts a beautiful campus set on 303 acres overlooking the Blue Earth River valley, perfect for study and leisure. In addition to traditional on-campus education, MSU, through the College of Extended Learning and the Normandale Partnership Center offers online degrees.

A new degree at MSU is the MS in Experiential Education. One of the two masters in educational leadership at MSU, the MS in EE is for working adults exploring leadership roles within schools, but not looking for administrative certification. The program is project intensive and emphasizes critical thinking and leadership skills for a variety of leadership positions: K-12 education, outdoor adventure programming, or corporate training for example. The other option is the MS in Educational Leadership. This 34-credit program can be taken hybrid or on-campus and prepares you for leadership roles in schools; it does not lead to certification. However, it can become a prerequisite to roll into the Specialist in Educational Leadership & K-12 Administrative Licensure Program.

MSU’s cost per credit is the second lowest on our top 20 at $472 per credit. This inexpensive, yet practical option is desirable even more when looked at with the annual ROI of 8.4 percent and the overall score of 50 from U.S. News and World Report.

7. Ferris State University

Ferris State University in Big Rapids, Michigan has 14,000 students on the main campus and their 21 off-campus sites. A big draw at FSU is the ease for transfer students to transition from two- to four-year degrees. In the tradition of the original founding, FSU has remained primarily vocational as opposed to liberal arts. The School offers 140 degrees that prepare you for a huge variety of in-demand occupations.

The Ferris State University MS in Educational Leadership is approved by the Michigan Department of Education; it focuses on leadership, management, risk management and the future. This means that those who complete the degree can apply for kindergarten through 12th-grade administrative certification in the state of Michigan. As for specific details and features, the FSU MS in EL has a robust two-semester internship designed to address a particular problem in rural schools by applying previous coursework and theory. Cheryl Thomas, an associate professor in Ferris’ School of Education, said the program allows her to “more successfully mentor my graduate students.” The 31-credit degree also features a capstone course which is a thesis, project, reflective portfolio, or comprehensive examination meant to demonstrate the synthesis of the whole program.

With one of the lowest tuitions of $588 per credit and one of the highest annual ROI percentage at 7.9, Ferris University is financially a wise choice. Add to finances the quality, and again, FSU shows its color; it scored 55/100 by U.S. News and World Report for an overall score.

8. Winona State University

Winona State University serves about 8500 students who choose from 80 undergraduate, pre-professional, licensure, graduate, and doctorate programs. In addition to the main campus in Winona, Minnesota, in southeastern the corner in the picturesque bluff country of the Mississippi River, the School has two satellite campuses, the West Campus in Winona, and Winona State University-Rochester.

“We prepare collaborative leaders to sustain and renew America’s democracy by transforming and managing schools and organizations for the benefit of each learner and with a view to the common good.” Powered by that noble mission, Winona State University offers the MEd in Educational Leadership. The degree is 33 total credits, 18 of core classes in the foundational leadership courses in law, finance, curriculum, and assessment, which, when completed, you then choose your track, principal or non-principal. The non-principal route allows specialization in your particular professional interest. Regardless of the path you choose, the program requires both a final paper and comprehensive exam. The Quality Matters (QM) Program, an external review organization, certifies the exceptional quality of WSU’s program.

Tuition is a reasonable $562 per credit with a robust 7 percent annual ROI making the long-term financial picture look good. With 77 percent of faculty tenured, the recognition of the QM program, and the 56 overall score from U.S. News and World Report, WSU deserves in our top 10.

9. University of South Florida

Located in Tampa, Florida and a member of the State University System of Florida, The University of South Florida serves about 50,000 students. Being a large University affords many academic options, 180 undergraduate majors, and concentrations, as well as over 40 graduate programs. USF makes an impact in both research and economics. USF is classified by the Carnegie Foundation for the Advancement of Teaching as a Doctoral University with Highest Research Activity, a distinction attained by only 2.5 percent of all post-secondary institutions and has an annual economic impact of $4.4 billion.

Relevant knowledge, engagement in collaborative relationships, alignment with quality leadership standards, These are just a few of the learning outcomes of USF’s MEd in Educational Leadership. The 36-credit program prepares you for every aspect of school building leadership, including first and foremost that it leads to Florida Level 1 Educational Leadership Certification. Courses will make you confident with school budgeting, school law, hiring personnel, overseeing curriculum and development, technology integration, facilities allocation, and program evaluation. The strength of the program is two internships, fall and spring semesters, that connect you with mentor administrators. Requirements for admission include and valid teaching license and two years of experience and a GRE if your undergraduate GPA is under 3.0.

Ranked by U.S. News and World Report #93 for Best Graduate Education increases respect for the program. Financially, tuition is low at $575 per credit, and the annual ROI is a solid 8 percent. All in all, a wise choice.

10. Arizona State University

There is little doubt as to the incredible job ASU is doing as a university. The main campus is located in Tempe, Arizona, but the School has five additional campuses. Boasting a #1 ranking from U.S. News and World Report for Most Innovative Schools, ASU’s research and academics are thriving. The 98,000 total students (52,000 at the main campus) enjoy hundreds of academic options from undergraduate to doctoral, a thriving student life, spirited athletics, study abroad choices, service opportunities. ASU is truly a world unto itself.

Aspiring leaders have two options at ASU for a MEd in Educational Leadership: The iLeadAZ Principal Preparation Pathway is a 15-month program is for current teachers aspiring to be administrators or teacher leaders. The program is blended, though mostly on-campus. Highlights include a two-semester internship and a simulated educational environment giving you maximum real-world experience; this field work builds on a standards-based curriculum. The Online Principal Preparation Pathway is a two-year program that is 36 total credits. Both programs prepare you for certification from the State of Arizona as a principal. Knowing that Mary Lou Fulton Teachers College is one of the top-rated schools also boosts confidence in the program and your employability.

Ranked #11 by U.S. News and World Report for Best Graduate Education Schools is reassuring. With 66 percent of tenured faculty and an endowment per student of $8,694, you will get the support you need to succeed. Tuition is $1033, and annual ROI is 8.5 percent.

11. Brooklyn College

“Nothing without great effort” is the motto of CUNY Brooklyn. Dedicated to living out this truth by a rigorous liberal-arts core, City University of New York-Brooklyn, offers 83 undergraduate programs and 71 graduate programs in the arts and sciences, business, and education. The 17,500 students enjoy the beautiful Georgian-style campus with the iconic library building with a tall tower; Princeton Review consistently cites the 35-acre, tree-lined campus as “gorgeous.”

Become a change agents in our schools through CUNY Brooklyn’s MS in Educational Leadership. This Degree is 36 credits and must be completed in three years. The emphasis is on “organizational development, building learning communities, models of supervision, educational policy, team building, staff development, and the critical analysis and application of educational research as applied to instructional leadership.” After coursework in leadership and foundational knowledge and practice, you are required to engage in a supervised internship in a local school. Also, you participate in two seminars, one on action research, and the other in a real-world field problem. The Field Problem Seminar is a research project based on critiques of current research practice. Admission does require a GRE and teaching experience.

With a $780 per credit tuition, CUNY Brooklyn’s high-quality leadership degree is within reach. Additionally, U.S. News and World Report scored Brooklyn 55 in overall score and had one of the highest percentages of tenured faculty at 96 percent.

12. St. Cloud State University

Founded in the Beaver Islands of the Mississippi River in St. Cloud, Minnesota, St. Cloud State University prepares young men and women “for life, work and citizenship in the 21st century.” The educational philosophy at SCSU is on applying knowledge to the real-world. The 15,000 students choose from 200 academic programs, 60 graduate degrees and education abroad choices on six continents.

Accredited by the NCATE and the Minnesota Board of School Administrators, the MS in Educational Administration and Leadership graduates leaders equipped to be agents of change. Lead by expert faculty in an online, face to face, or hybrid format, the degree works perfectly for working professionals or for those who want to go full-time; full-time students can complete the degree in 12 months by taking 12 credits for three semesters through evening and weekend classes. The degree is open to those without teaching experience, though requirements do change; Please note if you are seeking administrative licensure three years of teaching experience is required by the State of Minnesota. To complete your degree, you choose the culminating experience, either a research thesis or a graduate portfolio.

Not only does SCSU have expert faculty, but they have an expert 80 percent tenured faculty. Also bolstering their reputation is the 47 overall score given by U.S. News and World Report. Financially, you may hit a sweet spot for quality and price with tuition at $634 per credit.

13. University of Oregon

The University of Oregon is much more than a football powerhouse; they are a research-driven university that attracted $117 million in research awards last year and $1 billion in campaign gifts. U of O is a member of the prestigious Association of American Universities and is located in Eugene, Oregon and has nine schools, grants 316 degrees, and has 21 research centers and institutes for 25,000 students.

The Department of Educational Methodology, Policy, and Leadership offers an MS in Educational Leadership. The Degree trains students with “tangible skills that are immediately useful in using and understanding educational research and its application to problems of practice in a variety of educational settings.” The MS in EL has four areas of concentration: Policy and Leadership, Literacy Leadership, Quantitative Research Methods (QRM), and Educational Technology and Virtual Schools (ETVS).Please note, this degree and emphases do not lead to licensure, rather they prepare individuals for careers in student support services, staff and community relations, program coordination, associate program coordination, or advisor positions. The combined MEd/IAL Degree is a 51-credit program that does lead to licensure.

Ranked #14 and scored 47/100 by U.S. News and World Report for Best Graduate Education Schools and overall score respectively says a lot about U of O’s quality. Knowing this, a $27,751 endowment per student and the $1,343 tuition can help you see if it’s a fit.

14. University of Minnesota

The University of Minnesota is a public research university located in the Twin Cities of Minneapolis and Saint Paul, Minnesota. It is the oldest and largest campus within the University of Minnesota system and the flagship institution. There are sister campuses in Crookston, Duluth, Morris, and Rochester. A Public Ivy, the University is classified as an R1 Doctoral University with the highest research activity in the Carnegie Classification of Institutions.

The Department of Organizational Leadership, Policy, and Development’s mission to be a leader in advancing knowledge about educational and organizational change in local, national, and international contexts. The Department offers numerous degree options including a Master of Arts in Organizational Leadership, Policy, and Development with a focus in one of the following: Comparative and International Development Education, Education Policy and Leadership, Evaluation Studies, Higher Education, Human Resource Development, or Multicultural College Teaching and Learning. There are numerous degrees and specializations that one could choose, the options are worth exploring to find the right fit for your educational goals.

US News and World Report ranks the University of Minnesota at #21 for Best Graduate Education Schools as well as a score of 55/100 in an overall rating. The cost per credit is the highest on the list at $2093, but the higher cost may be worth the top-quality education and variety of options. The annual ROI is 8.6%.

15. University of Nebraska-Omaha

The University of Nebraska-Omaha is part of the University of Nebraska system and is a public research university with approximately 15,600 students. Interestingly, the last two incoming freshman classes have been the largest in UNO history with 2,069 new first-year students. The University conducts over $17 million of research annually and offers more than 200 programs of study.

Designed for educators who hold a teaching certificate and wish to complete the requirements for principal, curriculum supervisor, or other leadership positions, the Masters in Educational Leadership degree is a graduate program in which candidates attain professional certification in administration. The degree is 39 credit hours and must be completed in ten years. Classes are formatted for teachers who are currently employed, they are held one night a week during the school year, and three days a week during the summer. Most students finish the program in two years; endorsement can be completed in as little as 18 months. The endorsement option is for those who already have a master’s degree in education and wish to earn an administrator’s certificate. There is also the option to complete some of the classes online and through a “flipped class” format, which makes attending classes more conducive for the working professional.

The cost per credit is an affordable $626, and 78 percent of the faculty are tenured or on track for tenure, ensuring students quality instruction. The annual ROI is 7.6 percent.

16. Lehman College

CUNY Lehman College is a college that is part of the City University of New York system, named after Herbert H. Lehman, a former New York governor, United States senator, and philanthropist. More than 12,800 students attend CUNY Lehman which is located on a beautiful 37-acre tree-lined campus. CUNY Lehman offers over 50 majors and certificates.

The School of Education at CUNY Lehman offers three degrees: A Master of Science in Organizational Leadership which is 30 credits. A Master of Science in Education in Educational Leadership, which is 30 credits and leads to New York State Initial Certification as a school building leader. And a graduate certificate in Educational Leadership, Advanced Educational Leadership/District Leader Extension Program, which is 12-15 credits and leads to New York State Professional Certification as a school district leader. Working alongside the New York State Education Department, the M.S.Ed. Program in Educational Leadership is committed to preparing candidates who demonstrate the nine essential characteristics of effective leaders.

The cost per credit is one of the more affordable on the list at $780, and 95 percent of the faculty are tenured or on track for tenure, giving you a top-quality education. The annual ROI is six percent.

17. University of Idaho

Founded in 1889, the University of Idaho has educational centers in Coeur d’Alene, Boise, and Idaho Falls, while the main campus is located in picturesque Moscow, Idaho. There are over 11,000 students who attend the University; it is one of only 72 land-grant universities nationwide and offers 85 undergraduate, 62 master’s, and 31 doctoral degrees. The University of Idaho spends over $100 million annually on research and is classified as a “higher research” university.

There are several Educational Leadership degree options at the University of Idaho, most of which are for those who wish to pursue doctoral level training. The Master of Education (M.Ed.) or an Educational Specialist degree in Educational Leadership from the University of Idaho College of Education prepares educators for positions in education administration. It is designed for K-12 teachers and administrators who desire to transform schools into high-performing, inclusive and continuous learning communities. The degree consists of 30 credit-hours and ends in Principal Certification. The classes are available online, face-to-face, or a mixture of both formats. Those who are interested should have a background comparable to a bachelor’s degree in education.

U.S. News and World Report recognizes the University of Idaho as #166 for the Best Graduate Education and gives the University a 33/100 for its overall score. The cost per credit is $1297, but the annual ROI is nine percent. The University has a $23,442 endowment per student.

18. Texas A & M-Commerce

Part of the expansive Texas A&M University system, Texas A&M – Commerce offers more than 100 undergraduate and graduate degrees to the 6,000 undergraduate and 4,000 graduate students. The University recently built a new multi-million dollar science building on campus, providing students with the opportunity to conduct cutting-edge research in a state-of-the-art facility.

The Educational Leadership Department at Texas A&M – Commerce provides both a Doctor of Education and a Masters of Education program. With the ultimate goal to prepare educators for K – 12 education in Texas and beyond, the department is known for training future leaders in education; over 200 students graduate each year, and it is one of the largest administrator preparation programs in the state. Most of the coursework required is online. However, some of the certification courses incorporate onsite learning. While there are several certification and degree routes one may take, the Master’s degree in Educational Administration with Principal Certification is 30 credit hours, while the Principal Certification Only Plan is only 21 credit hours and can be completed entirely online.

The cost per credit is $823, and the annual ROI is 7.4 percent. Sixty-three percent of the faculty are tenured, and the University has a $2,315 per student endowment.

19. New Jersey City University

Chartered in 1927 as the New Jersey State Normal School, the teacher-training college opened in 1929. The University came from humble beginnings as the one building situated on 10 acres along Hudson Boulevard in Jersey City. Today New Jersey City University is home to 8,200 students; and offers 43 undergraduate degree major programs, 27 graduate degree and diploma programs, and two doctoral programs.

The Department of Educational Leadership at New Jersey City University provides two options for those who are seeking to further their education with a degree in Educational Leadership. Both options are primarily online, offering courses in online and blended formats during each term and continuing through the semester. The first option is a Master of Arts in Urban Education with a Specialization in Educational Administrations and Supervision. This degree requires 36 credit hours. The other options is a Supervisor Certification, which is only 12 credits. This endorsement allows candidates to be employed as a supervisor of instruction and athletic director (for those who do not hold a principal’s endorsement) as well as an assistant superintendent in charge of curriculum and teaching in public schools.

It is worth noting that 96 percent of the faculty are on tenure, ensuring students a top-quality education. The cost per credit is $1081 and, the annual ROI is 6.6 percent. The Educational Leadership programs at New Jersey City University are worth considering.

20. University of Northern Colorado

Located in Greeley, Colorado, the University of Northern Colorado was founded in 1999 when Colorado Governor Cooper signed a bill establishing the Colorado State Normal School. What began as a Teacher’s College has transformed today into a thriving university with over 11,000 students and 200 undergraduate and graduate programs offered on-campus, off-campus, and online.

The College of Education and Behavioral Studies at the University of Northern Colorado provides several Educational Leadership degrees. The Masters of Arts, Educational Specialist), and Educational Doctorate degrees are designed for educational leaders at all levels, P-12. The Principal and Administrator (Superintendent) licensure programs can be combined with any of the three programs to expand your career and leadership opportunities further. Additionally, students may pursue an Interdisciplinary Master of Arts degree in Educational Leadership and Special Education Administration which leads to dual licensure as a Principal and Special Education Director. These degrees are offered in a variety of formats and locations including on-campus, hybrid, and online.

One of the more affordable programs on the list, the cost per credit is $550. Fifty-four percent of the faculty are tenured, or on track for tenure, the endowment per student is $7,612, and the annual ROI is 6.4 percent, making the University of Northern Colorado worth consideration.

from Top Masters in Education http://ift.tt/2sfnof4

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draknek · 7 years

Text

My 2016 - videogames played

In 2016, I kept a record of what media I consumed, with a short record of my thoughts about some of them (one or two sentences only).

This is every videogame I played for longer than 30 minutes, and some of the games I spent less than that with.

This is part five of my 2016 retrospective. The other parts:

games I made

books I read

podcasts I listened to

films/TV I watched

videogames I played

boardgames I played

January

Imbroglio (beta) Ushered in the new year by playing this until 4am.

Patchmania Cute presentation but I'm never going to sit through hundreds of easy levels to get to the interesting ones.

Kaodoku Just as mind-numbing as normal Sodoku, and that's not a compliment.

Streamline (beta) Initially seems samey but there's a nice combination of mechanics here.

Land Sliders Nice UI, but unexciting game.

Divide By Sheep Seems like a puzzle game that doesn't take forever to get interesting?! Shame about the linear level structure and inability to queue moves up, but overall this was really enjoyable.

Go To Gold 2 The puzzles themselves seem like decent Sokoban-with-pressure-plates levels. But the controls are really bad, which exacerbates the tediousness of Sokoban.

Inch By Inch Nice idea, but the controls give no feedback for when you can move, which feels awful. Also a very ungenerous F2P lives system.

Does Not Commute Fun and full of flavour.

Luminare Surprisingly interesting for a short while, but quickly becomes samey.

Churchill Solitaire It's solitaire.

The Witness It's a shame that the most impressive part of this game is not also the most interesting. Overall I had a good time with this game, but towards the end my feelings soured somewhat.

February

CLARC [first three levels] Nice graphics but terrible writing and I don't have confidence that the puzzles will get interesting.

These Robotic Hearts of Mine [my own game] The damning problem with this is that finding optimal solutions is so encouraged, but largely uninteresting and a waste of time. If you ignore that part it might be okay as a storygame though?

At Dawn, Pistols Now that I think about it, I realise that the turnips/pumpkin controller doesn't fit the framing of this game at all.

Worlds Fastest Pizza Did a good job of making me not sure how much stuff there is to do.

The Greatest Voice of All A well-scoped jam game. Has some niggles, but overall it's fun.

DANCE DOOM Without strafing, this is really awkward. Entertaining to watch though.

Snow Cones Ridiculously cute.

Killing Time at Lightspeed Great concept! Not much resolution at the end though.

Skorpulac Ugh, it has a lives system :(

Swing Copters 2 I played for 15 minutes and didn't score higher than 1.

Arrowance Fairly standard play-indefinitely-to-score-higher game. Doesn't seem to get any harder over time.

Induction (beta) Smart time travel puzzle game! Sometimes hard to reason about, but worth playing.

Tomb of the Mask This would be great if it didn't have a permanent global points multiplier that makes scores meaningless.

PUSER TOH Nice idea.

March

Rust Bucket New levels introduce some interesting enemy types but could do with more checkpoints. Roguelike mode seems mostly unchanged in the early stages, which is maybe a shame.

Blackbox: think outside the box Seemed like an okay implementation of the "every puzzle is a different system to work out" thing, but I never felt compelled to go back to it after a very brief play.

Tacoma (beta) Main takeaway: it's cool to watch conversations split/rejoin. I've not played either, but it felt very much in the vein of Gone Home/Firewatch.

20something Hard to tell how close the fiction is to being autobiography, but it doesn't really matter. The end result is something that feels very real.

Unnamed Pokemon-like game from unnamed team (preview) Lotsa numbers, not really my thing.

Discharge Looks great for a jam game. Level design wasn't great at teaching what you're trying to do a lot of the time though.

BBTAN I played this for about 10 seconds before putting it down in disgust.

Semispheres (preview)

Metareal (preview)

PSHNGGG! This is really great but I uncontrollably grip the controller so hard that it's physically painful to play more than a few games in a row. This is the only game that has caused this problem, and I think is a sign of how engaging it is.

Knittens

Armed and gelatinous

Lazy Village

Planetary capacity

It's spring again

Wibble wobble

Orchids to dust

Lumini Very pleasant.

Please stand by So dumb and so entertaining.

Hello, operator!

Linelight

Octobo

Rotator

Planet licker

Palimseste

Threadsteading A strategy game played on an embroidery machine, in theory about claiming tiles but in practice more about denying them to your opponent. One of my best GDC anecdotes was the cliffhanger when the machine ran out of thread in the middle of sewing the scores.

Disc jockey jockey

Wiz

Dobotone

Von Neumann personality test

Mr Heart Loves You Very Much Nice mechanic.

Redder Good level design, a solid exploration of toggle switches and one-way systems.

Decodoku

West of Loathing (beta)

Journey of 1000 stars

Dungeon of the Endless Seemed to be easing me into it gently, up until I tried to move on to level 2 and got massacred on the journey there. Not my kind of thing.

Abzorb I want it to control like Helix, and the fact that it doesn't apparently makes this kinda unplayable for me.

Two Interviewees Not very subtle, but that helps get its message across I guess.

April

Mario Kart 64 I haven't really enjoyed dipping into any of the more recent Mario Karts, but this was enjoyable enough. One big difference is that less focus on drifting makes for a much more accessible game.

forget-me-not I gather from hearsay that playing well is all about grinding, but I found that kinda awkward with touch controls.

No Pineapple Left Behind

Say When

DivCircle

Dolfin Trash

Four Horsemen

Get Lost!

Telefrag

Niña Nueve Some "wait around for something to move slowly to the right place" tedium, but otherwise fairly stylish.

Pretender to the Crown Lots of puzzles! And nice graphical touches

Clickmazes BoxUp Nice idea, but maybe a bit too prone to "just do the only thing that doesn't make things unsolvable" syndrome.

Net I wouldn't want to do a larger size, but with edge-wrap even a 5x5 grid is surprisingly challenging.

Isles of Color Nice concept but ends up being more focused on backtracking than hard puzzles. Worth looking at as an example of exploring the intersection of mechanics.

Craequ I guess I can't ever relive the experience of playing it for the first time. Still neat, but short; I can't help but wish for harder puzzles.

Helix This game is crack to me. Everything about it just feels right.

Mammoth Monkey Mole Levels are too big, controls are too awkward.

Slayaway Camp (beta) Lovely theming of an otherwise not particularly novel game, but then it ruins it with "tap the grave for coins". Hopefully that'll be removed for the actual release.

PRISM Feels a bit like a more abstract/geometrical The Room. Satisfying, but not very challenging so far.

PROMESST Would be much more comfortable with a better map. When the midpoint hits, it hits hard and intimidatingly; I don't think I got much past that point the first time I played either.

Wobble Yoga Nice QWOP-like, though the shape detection could have been better.

shapeshit Really hard! That shape in the top left really doesn't want to be hit.

Stephen's Sausage Roll Even the tutorial area would be a great game on its own, and then it just keeps asking more and more and more of you.

Hanano Puzzle The less-well-known fiendishly hard game from the creator of Jelly No Puzzle. After a rough first level it's not so bad so far though (up to level 25).

Jelly No Puzzle Also not that bad!

Fish Fillets NG I just bounce straight off this level design: too-big levels, too-fiddly object shuffling. I remember trying it before but I'm not any more likely to stick with it second time round.

Chairs This is based on some chemistry principle but it didn't succeed in teaching me anything.

Tripad

Anamorphine

Sec9

100ft Robot Golf

Loud on Planet X

Ape Out

Bound

Swing Star VR

Not Everything is Flammable

Yesteryear

Marble Madness 2

May

Budget Cuts Only having one checkpoint felt punishing but it probably wouldn't have been that bad if I was playing in a home context. Really nice UI.

Robot Heist Nice ending.

Quick drop

Block swap

Cupkins

Balloon buoyancy

Sky rogue

Uh oh love comes to town

Hue

Windowframe One of the best puzzle platformer twists that's happened for a long while. Shame it has to use fake windows though, and I'm way more into the puzzley side than the action side.

ᗢ Cute! 1.5 years after playing I'll hear from the creator that some of my games inspired it, which is cool.

SHRUBNAUT

Cavern of Flight Some people will go "nope nope nope" because of the enemies, but they're pretty well done. I didn't get far due to the unforgiving time-pressure platforming.

There is no game I've played this before, but it's really well done.

June

A Rose for Icy Heart

The Maître D' This is fantastic themeing, good art and sounds, pretty solid work for a jam. Unfortunately it's let down by level design, there's too many levels and they're all kinda samey.

Size Matters Not sure how far I got, I bounced off an execution challenge level that felt way too finnicky.

Morphblade

Experiment 26 Incredibly disjointed, it gets slightly less so towards the end but probably not enough so for me to recommend. I think it could have done with more application of "yes and".

Time machine VR [first two missions] underwhelming to be promised time travel but then get the second mission be indistinguishable from the first

Lands end [first two chapters] soothing, not hard but I didn't really mind

Audioshield Does what you want it to.

The Lab The robot repair demo was significantly shorter than I was expecting.

pico park

Quasi

Dark Souls I think this caused longterm damage to my hands, and yet I can't entirely regret my time with it.

July

The Temple of No

Leap Day

One Last Cup (preview) Ridiculously ambitious.

39 Days to Mars (preview)

Modulus

August

Duck Roll Decent mechanics, but the difficulty curve is basically flat and it has a move counter :( Touchscreen controls aren't great either, but I still played most of the way through.

Overcooked

Puzzlepops Good thinky puzzle game.

Spaceplan First idle game I've played in ages, probably the last in a while too but it was fun enough. Nice aesthetic design.

Pole riders

Vacuum Really neat interconnected-world puzzle game! Lovely theming and attention to detail.

September

Fathom

4fourths

Multibowl

Super hexagon

Samurai gunn

Wibble wobble

October

Game Title A nice interconnected puzzle.

Life is Strange Lows: some time travel inconsistencies, not being able to rewind to mid-conversation, some really tedious filler content. Highs: overall good pacing and cliffhangers, good characters, I'm glad I got around to playing it.

Circles (beta)

Shadow Bug Rush Not my kind of thing.

Really Bad Chess I wish this didn't take so long to calculate AI moves, it makes it kinda unplayable on my old iPad.

Mallow Drops (beta) Too samey for my tastes

Game Title: Lost Levels Really neat interconnected puzzle about exploiting glitches.

The Trials Short and simple puzzle game.

Disorient on the murder express

Redirection

Four floors of doors (preview)

Snake pass (preview)

Mordheim

Sure footing

November

So Broken

min! Not my kind of thing.

Spider's Hollow Solid PuzzleScript game.

Integer Snake Not my kind of thing.

Knot Fun Nice enough idea, not much there though.

Sara Is Missing

December

Lara Croft GO Prettier than Hitman GO, and thankfully gets rid of "do it in x moves" challenges. Not as hard as I'd like, but enjoyable enough to keep playing.

WitchWay (beta) Cute, neat, wish the secrets were more puzzley though.

Blocky XMAS Decent version of the "Sokoban + things stick together" genre

Rose

Induction (beta)

Klocki Slooooow start which was very tedious, but gets more interesting.

Nest (watched) I can't tell if there's something I'm missing or if it's really just asking you to do what it seems like it's asking you to do.

The Last Guardian (watched)

Blarp!

Xortex

Firewatch (watched) Beautiful world, but plot didn't really come together for me.

Boats Cars & Trains

Noleap

Hanano Puzzle 2 Good set of levels for a game I already liked.

Tiny Heist Really solid stealth roguelike. Happily rung in the new year while playing it.

#2016 #videogames

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