#my poorly drawn romance | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

christinesficrecs · 5 months

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Happy Saturday! Enjoy these brilliant fics. 🩷

I don’t know why, but I guess it has something to do with you by LunaCanisLupus_22 | 17.8K

“You smell like me,” the guy says, scowling as he crowds in and Stiles staggers back between the coats and finally hits the wall. “Why do you smell like me?”

He barely lets out a garbled sound as the blood rushes to his cheeks. “No reason,” Stiles yelps, struggling to get his footing and grasping at a whirlwind of puffy fur.

His Only Defense by LunaCanisLupus_22 | 78.7K

Stiles had just accidentally challenged an alpha.

Oh God, and Scott had just stood by and let him do it. He was the worst best friend ever. Stiles was going to kill him. Except, oh right, the alpha was going to kill him first. Like beyond dead, ripped into tiny little pieces dead. So far dead that his dad would not be able to identify him, dead.

Laying Groundwork by LunaCanisLupus_22 | 10.9K

The one where Scott and Stiles go clubbing and there’s this broody Bouncer out to get Stiles-

Or get into his pants. Thank God it’s the latter.

Give you that thing you can’t even imagine by LunaCanisLupus_22 | 10.9K

The one where mateless Derek thinks no omega can affect him like they do other alphas and he’s about to find out he’s very, very wrong.

Shot Through The Heart by LunaCanisLupus_22 | 64.8K

The one when Stiles and Derek work for rival assassin companies and are sent to kill each other. It definitely doesn’t go as planned.

Foolish devouring things, build your castle in me by LunaCanisLupus_22 | 23.1K

“I will marry you,” he declares. “But should any more harm come to my father or my people, I will raze the earth itself until I feel the lifeblood drain from your corpse and paint my skin with it.”

It is not an idle warning, but from the princeling it has none of the desired effect. Derek feels no fear, but in this instance at least diplomacy triumphed over the spilling of more blood. It is all the same to him anyway. But Regent Peter was most insistent they avoid a drawn-out, gruelling war.

“Then we have reached an accord.”

Oh baby give me one more chance (to show you that I love you) by LunaCanisLupus_22 | 54.7K

“You like Derek,” he says slowly. “Derek Hale.”

His father grimaces at the accusation there. “Look, Stiles it’s complicated-“

“So when I was married to him,” he continues, voice rising. “He wasn’t good enough. He was taking advantage of me. ‘He’ll never be able to love you like you want, Stiles’. That’s what you said-“

Or the Sweet Home Alabama AU that nobody asked for.

I'm at one, and I've been quiet for too long by LunaCanisLupus_22 | 11.4K

“All in favour of Derek not dating for a full year so he can get his shit together and stop romancing people who want to kill us?”

Everyone raises their hands. Every single pack member.

Or the one where the pack insists Derek can't date anybody for a year but he ends up finding romance much closer to home anyway.

I know that you love me, even when I lose my head by LunaCanisLupus_22 | 135.5K

“We’re not mates, Cora,” he insists. “I mean look at him-“

“Ouch,” the kid says, no longer pushing that shit eating grin.

“He’s- he’s,” Derek tries, at a loss of how to explain why this can’t be possible. Why it shouldn’t be possible.

When sparks fly by LunaCanisLupus_22 | 87.5K | Abandoned

“Derek,” Stiles thunders. “Were you ever going to tell me your house is trying to hook us up?”

Derek’s head snaps up, eyes wide and scenting the evident crackle of magic in the air.

I'll wrap up my bones, And leave them by LunaCanisLupus_22 | 65.1K

The sign on the cage actually reads Beware: The Beast! in that crappy horror movie red paint that trickles down the paper in a failed attempt to appear like dripping blood.

And it would seem stupid if not for the living supernatural creature currently trapped behind its bars. Little hard to dismiss the big, hulking werewolf as a poorly constructed horror movie prop.

Oh how the mighty have fallen. Dude, cannot catch a break.

How long have I been on the hunt for you? by LunaCanisLupus_22 | 20.3K

“Well I guess accidental kidnapping is not so bad then,” Scott decided brightly after the others had finished describing their ordeals. “All’s well that ends well, right?”

“HAHA,” Stiles practically shouted, loud and unsettling enough that everyone turned to look at him. “I mean, yep. For. Sure.”

#sterek fics #sterek #ficrecs #fanfic writers #sterek fandom #author spotlight #lunacanislupus22 #author appreciation

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ada7201 · 4 months

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what do the blue lock boys do for you on valentine’s day?（╹◡╹）♡

Shidou, Rin, Sae, Kaiser x reader (seperate)

→ part 1 ⭢ part 2 ⭢ part 3 on the way!

gn! reader, google translated German for Kaiser’s part

don’t forget to suggest me things if you have any ideas! happy early valentine’s day (๑>◡<๑)

Shidou Ryusei

he gets you a TON of sweets (which he eats half of)

Sae once told him that love letters were a common thing for valentine’s day, so he tried to make you one.

it was a piece of paper, which was poorly folded and drowned pink glitter glue. he used scented gel pens to write a few “i love you’s” and smiley faces… it’s the thought that counts?

wrapped a ribbon around his neck and called himself your valentine’s gift.

decided it would be fun to wear your lipstick and kiss your cheeks - staining your skin with kiss marks

for lunch, he brought you to the park where you both played around, and afterwards sat down somewhere on the playground and munched on sweets (of your choice!)

the two of you watched those romance dramas together in the evening and fell asleep on an episode you weren’t paying attention to

“come on sweets, it’ll be fun!” Shidou whined, clinging onto your arm like a monkey, smushing his cheek against your shoulder as he pouted. why wouldn’t you let him do your makeup? “im great at makeup! you know that! i’ll do a special valentine’s day theme〜”

“Shidou- no!” you groaned, attempting to pry the taller man off of your arm. “you will not do my makeup, and that’s final!”

“fine…” Shidou sighed dramatically, letting go of you and falling to the floor in a pathetic manner. “guess you just hate me… and you’d even do this on valentine’s day?”

you huffed. he could be such a pain sometimes…

“alright, you can do my-“ your voice was cut off by Shidou’s big hand on your lips, a grin on his face.

“no need to talk more, bae - let’s get started…” he’d chuckle, almost evilly, before pulling out your makeup bag from the pocket of his sweatpants.

“how did you—?” you were cut off once again by his hand, and that stupid smile on his face.

“ah-ah,” he’d wiggle his pointer finger, before poking your cheek.

“let me do my magic!”

by the end of that hour, your face was decorated with sparkly stickers and hearts drawn in pink lipstick. your eyeshadow was almost terrifying, with the way it was so bright - brighter than Shidou’s eyes.

“perfect.” he’d giggle, hand on his mouth as he tried to hold back from full on cackling in your face.

surprisingly, Shidou isn’t bad at makeup - he just wanted to be a little silly for you on valentine’s day!

he posted a photo of you and your makeup, along with cute photos of the two of you throughout the day - like one of the heart engraved onto a bench with your initials, or maybe the photo of you sleeping peacefully with a bow stuck to your forehead - totally not Shidou’s doing!

he also baked with you - but it didn’t turn out great so you both decided to order takeout instead.

takeout wasn’t the most romantic meal, but it sure best whatever you both made…

Itoshi Rin

poor baby didn’t know what to do at first.

he spent a couple weeks planning and brainstorming ideas in his free time - even considering asking Isagi for advice.

instead of turning to that lukewarm freak, he chose to go with what he thought you’d like the most.

he bought you a sweet and simple bouquet, assorted with flowers of your favorite colours and type.

he wrote you a card, and got a plus he’d toy with it too.

he placed everything next to you in the morning, since he wakes up considerably earlier than you do.

when you woke up, you were pleasantly surprised with everything. thanks Rin!

when he got back home, he made the two of you some lunch.

he didn’t want to admit it, but he had been waiting to use the cute little heart plates you had bought especially for valentine’s day.

“this bowl is so cute!” you’d smile, admiring the pretty white plate decorated with pink and red hearts. “is this the one i got you valentine’s day?”

he simply nodded, placing down his plate - and sitting on the chair opposite you.

posted a photo of the two of you holding hands, along with a pretty sunset you both witnessed on your evening walk.

he definitely wasn’t too embarrassed to include the photo he took of your plates! he just wanted to be the only ones to see them

yes, he took you out on a walk in the evening - and when he noticed you shivering, he was quick to wrap his scarf around you and drape his jacket over your shoulders - not realising he just exposed himself and the pink shirt you had gotten him.

his face turned the same colour as his shirt! cute!

“Rin, why is your face so pink? are you getting cold?” you ask him, worried gaze focused on the way his cheeks were pink. “do you want your jacket back—?”

Rin quickly cut you off with a small peck, cheeks blushing even more after the small gesture.

“i was just… blushing.” he mumbles, looking away from you as a teasing smile made its way onto your face.

“aww, you were blushing〜”

Itoshi Sae

bought you a bouquet of purple roses.

purple roses mean love at first sight. <3

he also got you a matching set of earrings, a necklace, bracelet, and an anklet.

along with jewellery, he got you a piece of fancy clothing that he saw you eyeing. (example: dress, suit, button up, tie, skirt, and more! your decision)

got you a pack of cupcakes as a desert for lunch (or any yummy food if your choice)

he spent most of the day taking photos of you and admiring how beautiful you were - even with morning hair, even if you were still in your cheesy pyjamas matching that Sae got you, even if you had your face stuffed with sweets - you were beautiful and Sae wanted to capture that moment. (this is a regular occurrence, but was feeling it a bit more today!)

either takes you to a beautiful and expensive restaurant, or hosts one at home with candles lit nicely.

this valentine’s day, he chose to eat out with you - and brought you to one of the newest and most expensive restaurants in town.

“wow, Sae! this is really nice!” you smiled, placing your fork down next to your plate before looking up at Sae, who was sat opposite you.

“you deserve 10 times more.” he’d respond simply, shrugging off your words with a slight blush on his cheeks.

he watched the way your smile grew. cute.

could it be the perfect time?

“y/n.” Sae said, almost quietly - before pushing his chair back and standing up.

his slim fingers reached into the pocket of his nice dress pants - and you couldn’t help but feel your heartbeat quicken. what was he about to do?

“i have loved you since the first day i met you.” he started, hand wrapping around a small velvet box, before pulling it out of his pocket - he wasted no time on getting down on one knee, eyes looking up at the way you stared back down at him. “do you think that… you could make me even happier, and marry me?” he asks with a small smile on his face.

im sorry, but i definitely feel like he’s the type to propose on valentine’s day!

on the drive home, you had to remind him to her his eyes on the road because he kept admiring the pretty ring on your finger!

bought you another pair of cheesy pyjamas - this time, they were pink cat onesies.

he took so many photos of you and your cute little smile!

he posted a photo of your hand with the ring, being held by his

it took him a good 15 minutes to decide what photo to choose for the ring photo

along with the ring photo, he posted a picture of the two of you in your onesies, a photo of his hand on your thigh as you were both in his car - along with some others of the two of you having fun

Sae was stood in the jewellery shop, looking down at each glimmering ring in the display case.

his cheeks blushed as he imagined each one of them on your pretty hands, how could he ever choose?!

he just could not wait to hold your hand, and look down at the ring.

“um, Sir?” the accountant could ask, waving a hand in front of Sae’s face - who was currently spacing out and fantasising about holding your hand.

oh, guess he got caught up thinking about you.

just then, his eyes caught the most beautiful ring. he could practically see the happy face you’d make when he presents it to you!

he wasted no time pointing to the ring, neutral gaze looking back at the woman.

“i want that one.” he says flatly.

no woman other than you deserves to even look at him. how dare that saleslady even talk to him?

(this wasn’t on valentine’s day, but he practically danced out of the shop when he finally bought the ring)

Micheal Kaiser

how bold of you to assume he’d get you something?

jokes!

he bought you a bouquet of blue roses (a little cliche, but you it’s his thing!)

like Sae, he bought you a lot of pretty jewellery.

got you the prettiest piece of clothing, one that would match an outfit he bought for himself.

he absolutely insisted that it was a coincidence.

for lunch, he brought you to a diner he knew you liked - but when you asked, oh you liked this place? he never knew!

made sure to show you off more than usual the whole day, saying things like “they’re the only person worthy of my love” and other egoistical love confessions, if you get what i mean

for dinner, the two of you dressed up in your matching outfits

he practically begged you to be able to do your hair. (he’ll never ever admit it though, not with his ego)

when you were both finally dressed, you went to a party that his team was hosting.

when the two of you got home, he basically fell asleep on you!

“i’m not falling asleep.” he’d huff, unconsciously nuzzling further into your stomach as her hugged your waist. he just … wanted attention.

“sure,” you’d tease, fingers threading through his hair gently. “is that why you’re cuddled up to me right now?”

“ruhig sein,” he’d huff. “or you’re sleeping on the couch tonight.”

ruhig sein = “be quiet” / “pipe down”

you simply giggle at his words, patting his head gently.

“i’m sorry.” you’d pout playfully, before leaning down to press a gentle kiss to his forehead.

Kaiser had always loved being babied by you.

it was somehow… comforting?

posted a mirror selfie of the two of you, and maybe, just maybe, a photo of your cute smiling face - if i felt like it!

The next morning, Kaiser woke up to his phone buzzing constantly - and you clinging onto his side. he couldn’t help but bask in the glory of being so famous. he had a pretty person next to him in bed and his post has most likely gone viral once again.

he reached over to the side table and picked his phone up, u locking it quickly to read the comments left on his newest post - which was of the two of you yesterday.

“best couple!” “they’re made for each other.” “y/n looks so pretty!” “they’re matching!?”

was very excited to have so many compliments.

he realised that he gets a lot more when he posts photos of you

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weareapackofstrays · 1 month

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A New Kind of Love: Summer Before Fall Bonus Chapter

Genre: Non-Idol college au, slight enemies to lovers/friends with benefits to lovers, angst, romance, drama

Pairing: Minho x F!Reader

Warnings: None

Word Count: 1,962

A/N: This includes a flashback of Minho seeing Y/n for the first time. This is not a particularly exciting chapter, but something I had been wanting to get out before publishing the final chapter. Sorry if this is boring!

A New Kind of Love: Summer Before Fall Bonus Chapter Prev | Next

August 2023

Minho and his roommates were a mix of freshman to juniors and some of them had lived in the house since last school year. The guy that used to live in the basement apartment had graduated so the landlord naturally put the room up for rent last Spring. A few people had checked out the place, but nothing really panned out. While everyone was away for the summer, you met up with the landlord to tour the apartment. Feeling desperate for a change and in need of a new place asap, you immediately agreed to let the space. The boys had gotten word that someone would be moving in and were naturally curious who had taken over the vacant apartment. They assumed it would be another guy. The boys had not been expecting you.

Minho wraps a fitted sheet around his mattress as he tries to finish making his bed. He was the last to return to campus and decided to do a deep clean before the new semester started. He shakes out his comforter, flicking it into the air. As the comforter slowly settles onto the bed, his attention is drawn away by noise outside. He walks over to his window and sees a small moving truck parking to the side of the house. An older man steps out, walking around to the back of the truck to slide open the trunk door. Another car pulls up behind him shortly after. You and an older woman exit the car to meet who Minho presumes is your Father. He can’t really get a good look at his new neighbor as the summer sun is blocking his view.

Feeling a little too nosy, he decides to grab some of the mugs he’d let collect in a corner downstairs to wash. The kitchen sink window faces the side of the house that the basement apartment entrance is on. While Minho waits for the water to warm up, he notices the parents look to be bickering about something. You just stand there, arms crossed, watching the pair. Finally interceding, your parents seem to come to a truce and get back to unpacking the vehicles. Minho watches as you run back to the apartment, rushing down the stairs and into the basement. Your parents follow in tow and disappear inside. You return a few moments later.

"Hey, Dad. I’m gonna grab my suitcase from the trunk. I’ll be right back,” you shout.

Minho finally gets a proper look at you. You’re wearing jean shorts and a sports tank top. Nothing particularly special, but Minho thinks you could wear a paper bag and it would still look amazing. Now he is suddenly imagining you wearing nothing at all. He accidentally drops the soapy mug he was poorly washing into the sink and curses. When he looks back up you’re grabbing something from the trunk of the car. You look like you’re struggling. Minho considers going outside to help you, but his legs seem to have locked in place. His heart is drumming loudly in his ears. Luckily, your Dad comes out just in time before you’re crushed by the jigsaw of boxes you compacted into the trunk.

“Careful, Mija,” your Dad says as he takes down a few boxes to help you dislodge your bag.

“Thanks.” You nod and pull out the suitcase you had been struggling to get out.

Minho looks over your form as you roll the suitcase back towards the apartment, his jaw going slack. He is so distracted by you that he misses Chris walk in. Chris stops as he notices something outside has captured Minho’s attention. He’s unsure if it’s something pleasing or horrific, but whatever it is, his friend is completely lost to it. Chris finally comes up to Minho’s side and places a gentle hand on his shoulder, startling him from his thoughts.

“아 깜짝이야!” Minho turns around quickly, clutching his chest.

Chris puts up both his hands. “Whoa, there. You good, mate?”

“Yeah…sorry.” Minho takes a moment to recover his composure. “What’s up?”

“I just wanted to see if you would be down for pizza tonight.”

“Sure.” Minho leans against the kitchen counter throwing the sponge into the sink. Chris is about to say something when Jeongin interrupts him.

“Hyung, we’re getting pizza?!” the young boy asks eagerly.

Chris turns his attention to Jeongin. “Yeah, what kind do you want?”

“Cheese, pineapple, and black olives please.” The hyungs look at each other then back at their youngest with intense concern. “What?” Jeongin just blinks, not understanding their expression of disapproval.

“Pineapple? On pizza? 진짜로?” Chris can’t fathom the combination.

“미쳤어,” Minho says as he walks past the confused maknae.

“What?! It’s delicious!” Jeongin follows after Minho, attempting to explain why his combination of flavors is superior to any other kind of topping combination.

Chris steps in front of the kitchen sink and looks out the window to see what had held Minho’s attention earlier. Right on cue, you walk into view. He looks back at Minho in the living room, arching his eyebrow. Minho is currently teasing Jeongin, telling the rest of the roommates about his preferred choice in toppings. The room erupts into equal parts laughter and disgust. Chris hears you shout something outside which pulls his gaze back to you. Minho was not one to have his attention diverted easily by women. In fact, Chris was pretty certain he’d never even seen his friend genuinely like someone romantically. He shakes his head and sighs as he anticipates the trouble you would inevitably cause his devil bunny.

When Minho notices that Chris has left the kitchen, he heads back in to resume cleaning dishes…and hopefully to steal another glance at you. At the same time you happen to look up at the kitchen window and Minho quickly ducks. He waits a few moments before taking a peek once again. You were now facing the street. Sweat was starting to drip down your chest so you gathered your hair into your palm and started fanning yourself. Minho licks his lips subconsciously as he looks over every detail of your features. The sun now hits you just right and Minho thinks he’s either hallucinating or looking at an actual angel. A knot forms within his stomach and he tries to gulp, but his throat has become dry. Minho chastises his behavior. He’s a grown ass man, not a teenager who can’t control his hormones. He doesn’t need any distractions right now so he tells himself it would be best to avoid you for as long as possible.

Later that evening Minho notices the moving truck is gone so he steps outside for a smoke. He’s about to pull out a cigarette when a man approaches him.

“Hi!” the older man greets him cheerily. Minho quickly puts his pack away and turns to face him.

“Oh, hi.” Minho says quietly as he dips his head for a quick bow. The man is tall, a bit intimidating looks-wise, but seems friendly enough.

“I’m Gregory.” Your Dad sticks his hand out to Minho.

“Minho.” The boy smiles as he takes hold of your Dad’s hand.

“Minho, eh? You must be one of my daughter’s neighbors?”

“Yes, sir.” Minho starts to feel his palms sweat for some reason.

Your Dad puts his hands on his hips looking around the home’s property to soak it in, while nodding to himself. Minho stands awkwardly in silence, shifting on his feet. Gregory finally speaks. “She’s a good girl.” He looks back to Minho whose eyes are probably bugging. “My daughter. She’s a good student too. Shouldn’t give you any problems.” Minho continues to smile, unsure of what to say back. He wasn’t really a parents kind of guy.

“Well, I’ll get out of your hair then. It was nice to meet you, son.” He pats Minho on the back a little too hard, sending Minho slightly forward. “Take care of our girl!”

“Uh, yes, sir. Will do.” Minho gives a salute and cringes at his gesture. Gregory laughs as he leaves Minho and heads over to the car. Minho decides to walk back inside the house completely forgetting why he even went out in the first place. He just desperately needed to end this interaction. You get a small glimpse of the boy your Dad was speaking with before he disappears into the house, but not enough to fully see his face. You run after your Dad to help him continue unloading the vehicle.

“Who was that?” you ask as you grab a box.

“Just one of your upstair neighbors. He seemed nice.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah, I told him that if anything happens to you I’ll send your mother’s family after him and his roommates.” You nearly drop the box in your hand as you stare at your father, mouth agape.

“Please tell me you’re joking.” Your Dad ignores you, intentionally teasing you and you groan in response. The sun is finally starting to set, washing everything in a pink and orangey glow. You stop walking to look up at the house placing the box on your hip. There are some shadows moving behind the reflective windows and nerves suddenly spread through you as you think about having to meet everyone at some point. You wonder what type of people you’ll be sharing this old house with.

May 2024

Minho leaves his last class of the day and stops by a vending machine to grab a drink. Jisung is supposed to meet up with him momentarily to walk home together. As he takes a sip he spots you across the way coming out of the English building. It looks like you’re talking to some classmates. He watches the way your eyes crinkle as you laugh at whatever joke the guy to your left just made. Minho scoffs and rolls his eyes assuming the guy is trying to impress you. He angrily takes another swig of his sugary drink. You say goodbye to your friends and unintentionally head in Minho’s direction. Your entire demeanor shifts and your smile is quickly replaced with a frown. Minho doesn’t make an effort to hide and instead locks eyes with you.

The two of you continue staring at each other, both parties waiting for someone to make a move. Minho can’t bring himself to budge because he knows exactly what he’ll do if he does. He can tell you’re internally debating the same so he decides to make the choice for you. Minho shakes his head signaling to not come any further. Your shoulders slump and you can feel the prick of tears behind your eyes. Jisung interrupts the uncomfortable moment when he throws an arm around Minho and greets him. He follows his hyung’s gaze and sees you. Jisung waves at you enthusiastically and smiles. His smile always had a way of warming your heart, but in this instance it just made you even more sad. You return the wave, but barely smile back. Minho turns away in the direction of home, leaving Jisung to look back and forth between the two of you before finally sighing. He shrugs and shakes his head giving you one last wave before following the older boy. Minho forces himself to keep his eyes forward and not look back to see how hurt you might look.

Minho wasn’t someone to chase women, they usually came to him. It was just a fact. He didn’t really do relationships. Not because of commitment issues or bad past breakups. It was mostly because outside of schoolwork he was always busy dancing at the studio in his free time so he resigned himself to flings. They filled his needs, at least until they suddenly didn’t. Until he met you.

MASTERLIST

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Tag List: @linocz @queenmea604 @felixs-voice-makes-me-wanna @ana-marais98 @aller-geese @flowersun @stayandot8

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house-of-slayterr · 2 years

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Criminal Minds Incorrect Quotes:

Hotch: Damn, the power went out.

Y/N: Don’t worry, I got this.

Y/N: *shakes rapidly and starts to light up*

Hotch: What-?

Y/N: I swallowed a glow stick!

Hotch, on the verge of tears: WHY WOULD YOU-

Derek , throwing their head into Y/N's lap: Tell me I'm pretty!

Y/N, lovingly stroking their hair: You're pretty fucking annoying, that's what you are.

Y/N: I can’t believe all these people are wearing black. black is supposed to be my thing, they’re all just posers.

Derek : Y/N, for the last time, we’re at a funeral.

Garcia : You spent all our money on THIS??

Y/N, putting tiny raincoats on ducklings: They live outside. They need this.

Garcia : Treat spiders the way you want to be treated.

Y/N: Killed without hesitation.

The Team: 👀 *blink blink*

JJ: Life is like Y/N. It's short.

Y/N: Where are you going?

JJ: To either get ice cream or commit a felony. I'll decide on the way.

Y/N: Why does my arm shake and turn bright red when I’m eating dirt?

Emily :

Emily : Why are you eating dirt?

Y/N: Did I ask you if I should eat dirt? No, so answer my question.

An: Fucking Cannon

Emily : Don’t preach to me about romance, Y/N. I had a three-way in a hot-air balloon.

Rossi, looking at their reflection: Now, that's rubbish. Who's that supposed to be?

Y/N: Well, that's you.

Rossi: Me?! Is that what I look like?

Y/N: You don't know?

Rossi: Busy day.

Rossi: Well, Y/N and I finally did it!

The rest of the squad: *gasps, shocked expressions, etc.*

Rossi: That's right... We kissed!

Spencer : *Answers phone.* Hello?

Y/N: It's Y/N.

Spencer : What did they do this time?

Y/N: No, it's me, Spencer . It's actually me.

Spencer : What did you do this time?

Spencer : Are you an ‘arr’ pirate or a ‘yo ho ho’ pirate?

Y/N: I’m a ‘I’m not paying $600 for photoshop’ pirate.

Spencer : I find it very unseemly of Garcia to start dating again. Isn't the customary period of mourning 10 years?

Y/N: Die. Let's find out.

Garcia : Who knew getting in trouble would be so impossible?

Spencer : I gotta give you credit, Y/N. You make it look easy.

Y/N: Years of practice.

Hotch : Sorry, I'm late to the party. I've been doing things.

Y/N, entering in an unbuttoned shirt: I got caught up doing things too.

Rossi: Wow, Hotch was late too! What a coincidence!

Y/N: So what’s the plan?

Rossi: I don’t know. You’re smart, *points at Hotch * they’re mean, come up with something.

Y/N: Is letting someone win at chess sapiosexual bottoming?

Spencer : Can everyone in this godforsaken group please learn the skill called "Think Before You Speak"?

Elle: Ya know... it might be.

Y/N: So... who's the big spoon and who's the little spoon?

Elle: We're chopsticks!

Y/N: Well... that's cute!

Y/N: Does that mean you two snuggle together perfectly?

Spencer : No, it means that if you take the other away, the only thing the other is good for is stabbing.

Emily : For self defense reasons, I'm going to pretend to be a burglar and you guys have to act wisely.

Y/N, Spencer , & Derek : Okay.

Emily : If you don't want to die, give me all your money.

Y/N: Bold of you to assume I have money.

Spencer : Bold of you to assume I don't want to die.

Derek : Bold of you to assume I can die.

JJ, texting in the group chat: I wonder what Apple shots would look like?

Y/N: *Sends a picture of of a syringe with an apple slice shoddily edited inside*

Emily : *Sends a picture of a shot glass with an Apple poorly drawn inside*

Garcia : *Sends picture of person dunking a Basketball into the hoop but replaced the basketball with a poorly resized apple*

JJ: I hate all of you.

Spencer : Time for plan G.

Y/N: Don’t you mean plan B?

Spencer : No, we tried plan B a long time ago. I had to skip over plan C due to technical difficulties.

Rossi: What about plan D?

Spencer : Plan D was that desperate disguise attempt half an hour ago.

Hotch : What about plan E?

Spencer : I’m hoping not to use it. Derek dies in plan E.

Derek: I like plan E.

An: I didn’t include Gideon because fuck that guy!

#criminal minds headcanons #criminal minds #criminal minds incorrect quotes #aaron hotchner #spencer reid #derek morgan #emily prentiss #jennifer jereau #jj criminal minds #penelope garcia #elle greenaway #criminal minds x reader #david rossi

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besttropeveershowdown · 2 months

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The Worst Trope Ever Showdown: Round 1, Side B

Love Triangle

Two characters are both in love with the same person.

Propaganda:

It's all drama that distracts from the main plot. Unless it Is the main plot in which case the audience usually already Knows who they'll end up with so it just serves as pointless, and if they don't then it means people might get attached to the wrong person and it ends up upsetting half the people.

Idgaf about your romance drama I'm aro I'm here for the CRIME. Plus it's often written just because people want characters to be in relationships like shut up and fight a sea monster or something. / all love triangles do is cause violent ship wars polyamory is the solution to all problems

Romantic subplots are often done poorly. However, if you'd like to take your romantic subplot to new levels of awful, try a love triangle! Has double the amount of will-they-won't-they slog, twice as many annoying love interests, with extra unnecessary drama!

It nullifies interesting female characters in to who to choose wars and can cause rifts in fandom, especially if the author’s favorite to win the love triangle is obvious from a perspective outside of the narrative.

Humanoid Female Animal

Mainly a thing in animation (tho comes up in CGI in otherwise live action movies or w/e). the male of an animal species will range from somewhat anthropomorphic to looking pretty much like a normal animal, but the female of (supposedly) the same species will be extremely anthropomorphised & sexualised. often includes long hair on the head, heavy makeup, and boobs where the animals they are supposed to represent usually have none of those, and the males usually don't have any either

Propaganda:

ugh. UGH. can a female not exist without being a sexy sex doll? can a female not be hairy and animalistic like the male counterparts? can a female not have ANY interesting design features/ any design at all except 'sexy'??? CAN A FEMALE ANIMAL LOOK LIKE A FUCKING ANIMAL PLEASE. IF YOU'RE GRANTING THE MALES THAT GRACE WHY NOT EXTEND IT TO THE FEMALES JFC. IS THE ONLY PURPOSE OF A FEMALE CHARACTER OF ANY KIND TO BE SEXY TO THE AUDIENCE??? IS IT????? (also they just always look terrible like c'mon that thing is meant to be attractive somehow? to be visually pleasing to you somehow?? (sorry)

gotta slap a bow and eyelashes on to Girl character design bc god forbid we can't tell the boy and girl bunny/lion/deer apart!!!

Aside from the obvious sleazy aspect, it is also, in my opinion as a working character designer, deeply uninspired and often a symptom of a lack of real consideration going into the designs and/or world-building.

#the worst trope ever showdown #wtes polls #anti tropeaganda #love triangle #humanoid female animal

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kit-and-wolfe · 1 month

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Battle of the Bands

Hobie, Miguel, Gabriel, Gwen and 1st person pov OC / MC

New Adult magical realism AU (obvi) brain worm that has grown from a 2-shot screenplay for some fun comics into a monster. This fic is like Tremors in my brain.

The summer before college MC, Gabriel O'Hara, and Miguel O'Hara go on an international road trip with their metal band, Neon Requiem. Destination? BandFest, the Battle of the Bands in London guaranteed to secure the winning band a record deal. They meet other ATSV characters along the way.

No mention of Y/N / Reader, written from 1st person POV. Self-insertion is made easier by fewer details about the MC.

Notes on language: Tried my best here, if you are a native speaker of French, let me know if the MC's French is unnatural and I will love you forever.

Romance, angst, and poorly understood music concepts are often written as having a distinct visual component because I am an artist first. <

@pinksugarscrub @the-kr8tor I DID THE THING!

*******************************************************************

Chapter 1 - “Vous êtes maître de votre vie et de vos émotions, ne l’oubliez jamais. Pour le meilleur et pour le pire”

The Rusty Nail's neon whir and raucous rhythms had been muted to a melancholy hum that evening, it was a ghost town, the emptiness of the dimly lit bar echoing with decades of unfulfilled longings. I nursed my drink, letting the smoky burn of liquor etch contours of quiet contemplation onto my throat as I surveyed the handful of kindred souls keeping solemn vigil. Life had been feeling heavy, and I needed to write, to make art, and to get lost in music.

At the far end of the bar hunched a beautiful wraith, his slim, angular frame sheathed in torn denim and studded leather. Something indefinable shimmered around him, unsung poetry, snippets of melodies, a symphony I could see and hear and almost touch. Drawn like a moth to the lambent glow of the music, I slid onto the stool beside the ethereal punk spectre. In my mind's eye, I crowned him the prince of punk, a fairy tale rebel.

Our bodies brushed intimately in the cramped space, raising ghosts of sensation along the exposed skin of my fishnets. "Wozzat, luv?" he murmured, kohl-rimmed eyes flickering over the point of contact with a soldering heat.

Mon dieu, {My God} Had I spoken my admiration aloud? A flush crept up my cheeks as I scrambled for a response.

"Désolé. Je répétais quelque chose pour ne pas l'oublier… Need to write it down before I lose it," {Sorry. I was repeating something so I wouldn't forget it…} I mumbled, a flimsy excuse for my wandering mind.

Fumbling through my bag ,I pulled out my tattered notebook, fingers trembling as I scribbled down a scrap of verse inspired by the punk's incandescent presence beside me. I scribbled my observations in hasty strokes. The dying light of day bled into night, a liminal space that begged for a soundtrack. I could almost hear it, a melody just out of reach, shimmering in the smoky air.

"The liminal light of late afternoon, yawning into early evening…" I muttered, pulling on the strings of the melody, trying to draw it back to me. "I don't want to be loved for the things that I don't do. I don't want to be just a pretty face, I want to be a work of art…We are all just works of art."

The jukebox fell silent, making my mutterings around sift and strange, slightly unhinged---but the punk prince remained---his gaze heavy on my skin. I met his stare, unflinching. Unabashed curiosity flickered in eyes, wide brown and doe-like, framed by lashes so lush they seemed to blur the line between masculine and feminine, earthly and ethereal. I found myself dizzied by warring impulses - to flee this unsettling intimacy, or be consumed by it wholly.

He was a changeling, gorgeously androgynous: part punk Mona Lisa with a Cheshire cat grin, part Jean-Michel Baptiste, part force-of-fucking-nature. He made me feel like a background character in his story, could be a punk fairy princess, and I would be the dragon. My thoughts raced, fragments of poetry and half-formed desires. I scribbled faster, chasing the threads of inspiration, but a nudge from my prince brought me back to earth.

Snatches of poetry, raw and unfinished, that I urgently longed to refine on the page before they dissipated like the last wisps of smoke in a spent ashtray. But the punk's aura dragged me too deeply into devotional reverie. I glanced up apologetically as my concentration scattered, the thread of inspiration slipping through my fingers once more.

The bartender had sprouted up directly in front of me, and she eyed me expectantly. Her hair was a shock of blue curls and silver streaks shorn close to her scalp, it made her eyes seem more gray. Her skin etched with lines that mapped out the years like a roadmap. I felt the familiar pang of a poem lost to the ether.

"Un…Jack Daniel's, s'il vous plaît," {A…Jack Daniel's, please} I said, no longer able to filter its lilt from my words, as I wasn't paying attention to dulling it.

"Blimey, that's a proper choice, innit? You 'ere for the battle of the bands event this week, love?"

"Oui, how did you know?" {Yes, how did you know?}

"Just a…sense," he demurred with a wicked grin. "Call it a punk's intuition, darling. I'm in the mix too, y'know."

The bartender chuckled as she set my drink down. "You mean because everyone is here for Bandfest? Don't listen to this one, lovey, he's incorrigible. The crowds will be in later on, but you're a bit early."

"Shh, Roz. Who's up tonight?" The prince asked, a wicked gleam in his eye.

"Oh, you want insider information? What's in it for me?"

"Givin' away free tattoos, could autograph yer arm, love."

"I'll pass, thanks. The brackets are up in an hour anyway. It's Night Terrors vs. Death Rapture, Blood Prophecy vs. Cherry Bomb, Spider Punks vs. Neon Requiem…"

"Why are the punk bands going up against the metal bands?" I asked, just as the prince inquired about Phantom Pulse.

"There wasn't a lot of quality competition this year, or that's what the sponsors said, so they automatically advance to the semifinals since they won last year."

"Bollocks!" The prince cried, his outrage palpable.

"Oi Punk, you don't want to sign with Vic Luna at Zenith Music Group, anyway."

"Tu…ne le fais pas? Mais pourquoi?" {You…don't? But why?} The words tumbled out, my curiosity getting the better of me. At her blank stare, I repeated the question in English, heat rising to my cheeks.

Roz leaned in, her voice low, "Look kid, it's complicated…"

The prince rolled his eyes, a sneer playing at his lips. "Betrayed a lot of good bands."

"You don't need to remind me, Punk, I lived through it. Despite the changes at Zenith Music Group, they still organize the annual Bandfest, which showcases both established and emerging talent in the punk and metal scenes. The event is highly respected within the community and provides a platform for bands to gain exposure and connect with fans," the bartender continued, her words stilted, rehearsed.

"Ay, and they are the sponsor bringing in your crowds." The prince's voice was sharp, laced with an emotion I couldn't quite place.

"The only time we're out of the red, punkass. We'd have to shut down if it weren't for the Battle." She said heavily, "Which is the greater evil, we are a place of refuge for several members of the community, not just you."

"You don't need to remind me Roz, I'm living through it. Right, I'll stop ragging on the corporate sods for now, until you have some plausible deniability." He raised his hands in mock surrender, a bitter laugh escaping his lips.

"There's a good Punk." Roz smiled, sliding him another pint before retreating.

I made a mental note to warn my bandmates about Vic and Zenith's sordid history. We were in this for the music, not the money, no one played metal for the money--but it never hurt to be cautious.

"Roz is like the den mother of the London punk scene, a living testament to grit and resilience, and screaming yourself hoarse at basement shows. Dream t'be like her when I grow up. To listen without judgment, offer advice without preaching, and know when to slide a shot of whiskey across the bar and when to cut you off. She has a way of looking at you, really seeing you, like you matter… like you are more than just another face in the crowd." His voice trails off, heavy with emotion. He blinks and shakes it off.

"Can I see it?" The prince's voice cut through our lost thoughts, his fingers reaching for my notebook.

I clutched it to my chest, a knee-jerk reaction. "Can you look into my very soul, like Roz?"

His smirk widened, that Cheshire cat grin that set my heart racing. He nodded, a challenge in his eyes.

"I'll show you mine if you show me yours," he purred, and I felt my stomach flip. I repeated the phrase in my mind, first in French, then in English, just to be sure I'd heard him right. Wasn't this some flirty idiom?

"You have a book of poetry somewhere hidden in those skinny jeans, mon ami?" {my friend?} I ask, hesitant, double-checking his meaning. He flirts like others breathe.

In lieu of an answer, he produced a sharpie from thin air. Before I could protest, he had my arm in his grasp, his touch electric against my skin. I shrugged off my leather jacket, baring my arms to his ink-stained fingers. Roz chuckled as she set another drink before me, clearly amused by the prince's antics.

"You'll need it…I see you took this wanker up on the free tattoo offer. Don't let him draw any on your arms."

"Any? …Any what?"

"Wankers," she clarified with a laugh. It clarifies nothing, I need to study my British slang.

"I would not mar the flesh of such a beautiful and willing participant, Roz. Kindly fuck off," the prince mumbled around the sharpie cap clenched between his teeth.

Between the verses he scrawled, he peppered me with questions, his voice a giddy whisper.

"So, who's your poison, love? Which bands get your motor runnin'?"

"Ah, j'adore Rammstein, Gojira, et bien sûr, Motörhead. And so many others, doesn't even scratch the surface. Et toi?" {Ah, I love Rammstein... And you?}

"Proper choices, those. For me, it's the classics - Sex Pistols, The Clash, Buzzcocks. Real raw, in-your-face stuff, y'know?"

I leaned in, excited, but too close. I nearly jumped as my lips grazed the dusky shell of his ear. "Ah, un homme de bon goût! I've seen the Buzzcocks live, you know. Pure chaos, c'était incroyable!" {Ah, a man of good taste! I've seen the Buzzcocks live, you know. Pure chaos, it was incredible!}

"No bleedin' way! Metal chick like you? I'd give me left bollock to have seen the Sex Pistols live. But I did catch The Clash back in '07. Changed me life, it did."

"Lemmy, sans aucun doute. The man's a legend!" {Lemmy, without a doubt.} I declare into the bar.

"Oi, don't go disrespectin' Johnny, now! The bloke's a punk icon, 'e is!"

"You're a punk icon!" someone shouted from the back, but the prince waved them off with a grin.

"Oh, I didn't catch your name," I said, with a sudden shame, my brow furrowed.

"Everyone just calls me Punk. You can too. Just not dirty punk, we don't want to come to blows, do we, love?"

"I'd kick your ass, mon ami. Pas grand chose à donner, mon petit prince des fées… eh mon prince dégingandé, right? I would not describe you as petite even if you are skinny." {I'd kick your ass, my friend. Not much to give, my little fairy prince… eh my lanky prince, right?}

Miguel was at my side in an instant, all rippling muscle and furrowed consternation. "Carnalita, {little sis} why did you sneak out on practice just to drink in this hellhole?" he rumbled, disapproval lacing every sonorous word. Tenderness faded a bit.

I met his gruff chiding with an insouciant toss of my hair. "Salut, Miguel. Ça fait longtemps." {Hello, Miguel. It's been a while.}

"Is that Jack? No puedo mas… Carnalita…This shit is bad for you." {I can't take it anymore…little sis...}

"Je nais etre rond comme une queue de pelle. Tu es vraiment un trou de balle quand tu dis des choses pareilles!" {I would be round as a shovel handle. (Idiom, essentially she is saying ~ I was born to be drunk) You are really a dumbass when you say things like that!}

Miguel's grumbling stream of Spanish reprimands washed over me as I settled into our familiar dynamic - the tender yet terse cantata of friend and protector that had composed them score of our relationship since childhood. For all his bluster, I knew every arrhythmic cadence encoded Miguel's steadfast affection.

Only Gabriel's soft interjection could salve the rising discord. "You worry too much, Miggy. We've been practicing all week."

He cast me a plaintive glance, silently pleading for conciliation, and I grudgingly obliged with an internal eyeroll. "Qu'il aille se faire! C'est vraiment chiant tu te rends compte." {Let him go fuck himself! It's really annoying, you know.}

Heedless of my saucy french asides, Miguel merely drew a fortifying breath before continuing in that maddening timbre of unrelenting reason. "Gabri and I could have come out with you. You shouldn't go out alone in an unknown city - it's not safe for you, mi carnalita."

The prince leaned towards us with a lazy smirk, "S'not that serious. The Rusty Nail is safe enough." He paused as the bartender snorted in agreement before continuing, "We're keeping the lady safe, mate…you can trust me, I'm one of the Spider-Punks."

Miguel simply sneered at the prince's proffered handshake, dismissing it out of hand. "You have arms like sticks. How would you keep her safe?"

The punk's smirk widened as he shrugged. "Ah, one of those. Never skip leg day, eh bruv?"

I strangled a guffaw as Gabriel hastened to run interference, engulfing the punk's hand eagerly. "We've heard of you guys, the local punk band, yeah? Your drummer is…gahh…Ah-Mazing! You think we could meet?"

"You call that punk noise "rock"?" Miguel scoffed. "Metal is where the real skill lies…Real talent is in the complexity, the technical skill. Metal pushes boundaries, takes you to new places. Punk's just three chords and an attitude."

I rolled my eyes. At this rate, I'd have to drag Miguel out before he started a brawl.

"Ah, mais non, Miggy. There's art in simplicity too. Punk, metal, it's all about the energy, the message, non?" {Ah, but no, Miggy. There's art in simplicity too. Punk, metal, it's all about the energy, the message, right?}

Miguel grunted, but squeezed my hand.

I stood, motioning for him to lean in close. "Allez, let's save the competition for the stage, d'accord? I learned some things about the record company. We should talk in private." {Come on, let's save the competition for the stage, okay?}

The prince unfolded himself, towering over me. "Tell you what, mate. Let's settle this on stage. We'll let the crowd decide who's got the real chops," he challenged.

Gabriel chimed in, "Pero, mana's right, Miguel." {But, sister is right, Miguel.}

Miguel looked ready to explode, but Gabriel's eyes held him in check.

"Music's music. Let's just focus on putting on a good show, and maybe we can learn something from their band, eh?" Gabriel said.

The prince leaned in, lips grazing my cheek. "Aye, love. Can't wait to teach your wall of meat here a thing or two. How about we give 'em a show they won't forget…later?"

I grinned, "Oui! A collaboration? Here… Ça ne casse pas trois pattes à un canard…mais, pour vous. I want it back later." {Yes! A collaboration? Here…It doesn't break three duck legs (Idiom ~ It's nothing special) …but, for you. I want it back later.}

The lanky punk sauntered off, his studded boots leaving faint trails of glitter on the barroom floor. Miguel's scowl deepened as he watched him depart, fists clenched tightly.

"Is that your poetry notebook?" he growled, voice rumbling low.

"Yes, I traded it to the punk faerie for these tattoos, I smirked, revealing the vine-like scrawl of ink now adorning my flesh like raised scars from whipping brambles.

Miguel's face darkened further, storm clouds gathering at my words. "The one you never let anyone touch or read…"

His voice strangled to a whisper, and I could not parse the complex calculus of emotions flitting behind his eyes

Gabriel placed a calming hand on his brother's arm.

"Easy, hermano {brother}. He's not worth it," Gabriel said in a soothing tone.

"Be nice, Punk is a good guy. I like him," I countered softly, a warm glow blossomed within me as I realized my entire arm was now a crawling garden of sentences entirely in French.

Miguel opened his mouth, undoubtedly to unleash a heated retort, but Gabriel cut in, "Should we go look at the brackets to see who we're facing?"

"It looks like my entire arm is covered with quotes from The Little Prince, which happens to be my favorite book. It's actually quite a sweet gesture," I said softly, fingertips grazing the raised words like treasured runes.

With renewed curiosity, I examined the ink quote now etched on my skin: "Vous êtes maître de votre vie et de vos émotions, ne l'oubliez jamais. Pour le meilleur et pour le pire." {You are the master of your life and your emotions, never forget that. For better or worse.}

I didn't mention the lone scrawl that could have been a phone number hidden amidst the literary foliage now vining my limb. Miguel was in full-on Dad mode, and I didn't need to add fuel to that particular fire.

"I already know the competition for the quarterfinals, we don't need to waste our time. Come on, manos {used as slang for brother}, we're going to kick some ass!" I giggled brightly, elated at my new 'tattoos' scrawling up my arms. I didn't put my leather jacket back on, I didn't want to cover any of it up.

Miguel's glare never wavered, his eyes fixed on the far side of the bar where the prince had disappeared into the crowd. "Don't tempt me. Let's go, carnalita {little sister}, time for practice."

With a resigned sigh, I surrendered to my brothers' insistent tugs, allowing them to lead me from the Rusty Nail. But the punk prince's parting words still reverberated through my mind like the lingering notes of a siren song. Later, he had purred, that single hushed syllable seeming to contain all the intoxicating lure of a siren's call - equal parts velvet promise and brazen challenge, twined inextricably into an enchantment I could not resist. The whole damn bar was a sailor's nightmare.

#across the spiderverse #hobie x reader #hobie spiderverse #hobie fluff #hobie brown #astv hobie #spider punk #au spiderverse #miguel o'hara #miguel spiderman #miguel fanfic #hobie fanfic #miguel o'hara x reader #gabriel o'hara

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ghoulsgonestaledefunct · 8 months

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I love doodling these little guys hehe

#mcr #frank iero #gerard way #mcr fanart #my chemical romance #my chemical romance fanart #revenge era #ray toro #mikey way #michael romance #my poorly drawn romance #staleghoul

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olderthannetfic · 1 month

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Also, re: the Unit 731 thing, that's part of what has been blown wildly out of proportion--because what the author actually said is that her grandfather told her ghost stories when she was growing up, which inspired her novel. It wasn't until much later, and she's said her book was already well under development by then, that she learned the ghost stories he was telling had been inspired by Unit 731 and what was done to her people during that period of time.

This makes sense to me, given that the only element that seems directly drawn from Unit 731 is part of the third act plot twist that shifts the reader's understanding of all that had come before and is something the FMC was not aware of for the bulk of the novel. I can understand the kneejerk response, but the fact is, a lot of the author's words were deliberately misconstrued and taken in extremely bad faith to make it seem ok to attempt to harass her out of a career.

At worst, what she might be guilty of is handling the story she was trying to tell poorly--as I said in my first ask, there are many critical reviews that are fair in their assessments, just not the very specific ones I was talking about--but that doesn't make everything that followed justifiable.

The entire space of het dark romance or romantasy or whateverthefuck seems to be rife with stupid wank as people jockey for position.

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acephysicskarkat · 2 months

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The wild thing about Tumblr and enemies-to-lovers is that while it seems magnetically drawn to stuff that does it so badly it'd work better as deliberate subversion than sincere endorsement, its instincts as to what should happen in a good enemies-to-lovers arc are actually spot on! It's just that instead of seeking out stories where those things, what's the word, actually happen, they seem to prefer ones where they don't, and then just pile on headcanons and "this must have happened at some point because it'd be stupid not to" until their version of the story is impossible to reconcile with the original media.

Like, the idea that C*tra was pulling her punches on Adora throughout the first four seasons of SP0P is nonsense. It's overtly incompatible with literally every interaction the characters have between the first outright murder attempt in "The Promise" and the apology in "Corridors", in which C*tra repeatedly tries to kill Adora in painful ways, layers on the emotional cruelty with a trowel and literally tries to end the world just to hurt her*. It's brought into the show in S5 and it doesn't make much sense when it is because it meshes so poorly with what we've been shown!

But this nonsensical claim has so much traction because it would have been smart for the writers to make it true. And I don't mean in the "it doesn't make sense but S5 pretends it does" way, I mean if C*tra had been pulling her punches, had dialled back on the awfulness instead of cranking it up to maximum every time Adora entered her line of sight, the romance might actually have been good.

You get similar nonsense from R*ylo. That post about "a character who wants to be evil but inadvertently does good" does not describe Kylo Ren, whose attempts to resist "the call of the light" are entirely successful by the end of TLJ and then he's just magically saved by the power of JJ Abrams' hackery. But the romance might begin to maybe sorta make sense if he was, so obviously that must be true, and the degree to which he just sucked as a person needs to be rewritten in light of that necessary truth.

It's just...wild to me that these very good instincts about what it would be a good idea for enemies-to-lovers writers to put in are used not to identify ones that do those things, but to encrust the ones that don't in such a dense layer of fanon that the original form is entirely unrecognisable, like a dead parasite at the heart of a pearl.

*"but ND said C*tra pulled the lever out of curiosity-" I have dismissed that claim on the grounds that I've actually watched the actual episode under discussion with my own fucking eyes, twice, and if the original intent was to portray C*tra as being motivated by curiosity it failed so hard it deserves some sort of high-velocity medal

#spopcrit #swcrit #this is of no consequence compared to [gestures at the everything] but I had a thought and needed to share

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mermaidsirennikita · 3 months

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ARC REVIEW: A Fate Inked in Blood by Danielle L. Jensen

4.5/5. Releases 2/27/24.

Heat Index: 6.5/10.

Vibes: vIKINGS!!!!, slutty guy/serious girl, "oops I'm married to your dad", and legitimately intense battle and magic stuff that actually works and puts people in those heartrending situations where it's all "STAY ALIVE!!!!! I WILL FIND YOU!!!!!!!!!" as it should in a FANTASY ROMANCE

Married to a man she hates and hiding the fact that she's the child of a minor goddess (children of gods are a Thing in this world) Freya lives a life of drudgery. Until, that is, her secret is revealed to all and Jarl Snorri declares that she's a prophesied shieldmaiden, meant to clinch him the kingdom he's always wanted. As such, she must marry him--kind of an issue, as she is very, very attracted to Snorri's son Bjorn. Another issue: Bjorn has been bound to Freya as her protector. On top of everything, Freya's goddess-given abilities are obscure but dangerous, leading her to wonder if her fate is less that of a protector than that of a monster...

OOOOH WE'VE GOT SOMETHING HERE. I've read Danielle L. Jensen before, way back in the day with her Malediction books--but those were YA (albeit, pretty hot YA) and I really don't read YA anymore. However, I do like Viking Shit, and I especially liked the idea of a romance between a Viking lady and her husband's SON, which was something I always wanted to happen on Vikings. So I picked it up.

And dude. It sucked me right in. I am, as I will get into more below, kind of a hard sell on fantasy romance--when it works, I am HOOKED but when it doesn't I am quickly turned off. This is the former. I was so drawn to Freya, a heroine who does have Chosen One aspects, but is also very human and just trying to make it work, one battle at a time. (Also? She's not instantly gREAT at fighting, how refreshing.) And I absolutely fell head over heels dumb girl for our hero Bjorn, who I expected to be a stoic silent warrior type. NO. He's so much better. He's like, an amazing warrior--but is also so funny and super slutty and just a BRO. I love him. Protect him.

The fantasy plot is compelling and doesn't get so in love with itself that it's impossible to follow. It's really good! I'm excited by this! Can't wait for the next! (What a relief, God.)

Quick Takes:

Here's my issue with fantasy romance (or romantasy, though I'll point out that this series is billed as "fantasy romance" on Netgalley, and that is so HOT to me): often, though the name implies that it's a subgenre of romance with a heavy fantasy bent... It's basically fantasy (well-done or not) with a romance subplot tucked in. The character work is shoddy, the tension is nil, and you can tell that the author is just trying to horn in on the romance audience. Not so, here.

First off, I think Jensen was really smart to create a fantasy world that is very "Vikings But Fantasy". It's not poorly drawn. You can tell that she's really into the Norse vibe, and I will say that I am biased because as someone who has somehow been watching the Vikings franchise since its inception (pray for me) I'm fairly familiar with it on that level. But the way she weaves the fantasy elements, most distinctly the idea of these empowered children of gods (who are basically made when their mortal parents HAVE THREESOMES WITH GODS??? Amazing. Just imagine having these superpowers and knowing that it's because your parents took some dude home from the bar one night and he turned out to be Thor.) into the story is really natural.

Secondly... There is a really compelling plot, yes. I am really into the duality of Freya, don't get me wrong. I really like the royal intrigue. All the WIFE DRAMA. It's My Brand. But the real heart of this story, very openly and honestly and presented without any self-consciousness, is Freya and Bjorn. And I think Jensen just lays it all out there the moment she introduces the brilliant plot device of "Bjorn's Dad, Who Freya Is Technically Married To, Wants Bjorn To Follow Freya Around And Make Sure She Doesn't Get Into Danger". Oh, so he's supposed to protect her as she hurtles into adventure and fights Viking zombies and shit? HOW CONVENIENT. Throughout the story, their immediate physical attraction melts into this emotional slow burn... and I am also a hard sell on a slow burn, so thank you for doing it right, Danielle. The book is single POV (Freya's, though I wouldn't mind Bjorn's in a future installment) but you can just tell that Bjorn is so mad that he's this into a woman who is technically his stepmother. Like, he can have anyone! But he wants HER. But he can't have her!

Picture me gobbling this up like a raccoon in a trash can.

--Speaking of! If you're all "ew, I hate that Freya is married to his dad"--no spoilers, but this is dealt with in a way that I think both avoids the ick that some readers (to be clear: not me, I am very resistant to ick) may feel over that setup, and avoids a copout.

At the same time... First off, Bjorn doesn't fully know that the ick has been avoided, and to be frank, I don't think Bjorn really cares about a little ick. But he does have like, you know, the "WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME" vibe for a while, and it is delicious. All very illicitaffairs.mp3.

--I also really loved that there is no mistake about Freya being a GROWN WOMAN. I strongly, strongly object to shelving this as New Adult, because regardless of her age, Freya (and honestly Bjorn as well) has been through a lot. She's literally married when we open this novel. She gets a second husband. She is not a virgin; her marriage was not chaste; it sucked. (To be clear: you don't get a lot of insight into Freya's first marriage beyond "it sucked" because it's dealt with pretty quickly. You don't see any sexual assault on the page in this book, and I don't know that Freya would see it that way? It's alluded to as "lie back and think of England" bad, gross sex, which I think suggests assault, but there is not any explicit violence, sexual or otherwise, depicted in either of her marriages.) She is JADED. She has never had a man like, take care of her.

And then she gets linked up with local dude who's snarking at her horrible husband about how he must not go down on her enough, and she's all "WHAT'S THAT MEAN :/". I really, really enjoy a pairing that involves a tough woman who's never been properly taken care of and a man who's like "I am DESPERATE to take care of you". Freya deserves!

--Another good choice: often, in fantasy romance (or at least in fantasy romance of yore; I feel like there has been a recent push to correct this, at least somewhat) the heroine is hypercompetent. She's smart, she's a good fighter, she's a femme fatale, she's the seventeen-year-old master assassin...

Freya is... a person. She does want to fight, and she is--not surprisingly, as she does come from a culture in which women do fight--not incapable of holding her own. Somewhat. But as soon as she's up against a master warrior like Bjorn, she's kind of not great, Bob, and even with the benefit of her goddess-given abilities, she still has a lot to learn. It's giving "Book One Aang", and I'm good with that. I'm actually much happier with her giving Book One Aang as a twenty-something woman because like? Give us hope, Freya.

She also doesn't have all the answers. Frankly, Freya doesn't have 80% of the answers, and she shouldn't, because she's new to this. She's new to the magic stuff (though she knew she had it, which I did like--she's not an Alina Starkov-level "WHAAAT" about it) and she's new to the court intrigue, and frankly she's new to Hot Dudes. Speaking of, she does spend a decent amount of brain time going "STOP! STOP, SELF! DO NOT LOOK! DO NOT TOUCH!" Which, frankly, I loved. I feel like that's the kind of behavior people are going to be annoying about because people are dying, but like. This woman just spent years surrounded by Village 2's and suddenly she's being swung around and guarded by a very flirtatious Royal 12. Give her a break. I would be much worse.

And she doesn't know what the hell she's doing with this man. She knows the mechanics, but she doesn't know the FINESSE. Speaking of...

The Sex:

The reason why I'm between a 6 and a 7 on this (and that's not quality, that's literally just how hot the book is re: sex acts) is that the story is a slow burn. Everything sexy happens in the back half, and you don't get to the full shebang until pretty late in the game. It's ABOUT THE YEARNING.

However, I think this was a good choice, and when we do get those scenes they are super hot (and explicit, though not like Sierra Simone explicit to be clear) and passionate and you definitely get the sense that it's this giant deal for these two. I was quite touched. I was like "awww" but also "oh" which is where I want to be when a story builds to two people hooking up for that long.

And Jensen fully takes advantage of the "Vikings" component and does have some "under the sleeping furs with 76 people sleeping in the near vicinity but we just need to get this done" action here. Which. Brava.

I'll be honest--I was worried about this, as I feel like I've been let down by a great fantasy romance in the past. I, much like several people in this novel, have been burned before. Not so here. I'm fully on board. I loved where we left off, and I cannot wait to see where those two crazy kids go next. Hopefully, like. To Vikings divorce court. So she can end that marriage to his dad.

Thanks to Netgalley and Del Rey for providing me with a copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

Preorder:

Amazon

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Bookshop.org

#romance novel blogging #romance novels #arc reviews #netgalley #book reviews #book recs #books

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sunflawyer · 4 months

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rant bc i feel like im losing my mind

i dont mind sharing my f/o with another selfshipper, in fact i feel happy sometimes cus that means people feel the same way like i do.

But one thing that i absolutely despise is my f/o's canon ship. In my opinion they have an unhealthy relationship (that led to them divorcing) with them destroying each other's lives. i love romance and seeing a couple breaking up breaks my heart too much. i do like them separately but together they're a disaster.

And the biggest reason why i dislike his canon ship is because of their fans. on Twitter i got attacked and harassed by them because i said i "prefer my selfship more than the canon ship" and boy I got called misogynist bc they thought i erased his canon partner and replaced her with my s/i, which is also a woman. they kept harassing me for months and even called my s/i 'ugly', 'blank', 'boring'. some of them even made a poorly drawn art of my s/i getting sh0t in the head.

i have never said anything bad about the canon ship at all. i just said i like my selfship.

twitter is such a scary place i dont recommend going there at all especially in my situation.

#🐤mayo's diary #mayo.txt #i just wanted to make a post of this because i need to let it out #and show to the public that their hardcore fans are so fucking toxic it blew my mind #i dont have anything against their fans #← but the hardcore ones are just headache #no bc almost EVERYONE on twitter attacked me because of this. almost all of their fans.#its so frustrating

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ridley-was-a-cat · 19 days

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Winter 2024 Anime Roundup

Anime of the Season – The Apothecary Diaries

I’ve been hearing about this series since Raven of the Inner Palace aired a while back, and the fans spoke so highly of it that I was dubious of anything living up to the expectations they’d set. Luckily for me, they weren’t exaggerating one bit, and the anime adaptation delivered a story that had me itching to watch the next installment as soon as the episode ended each week.

The story opens with Maomao getting abducted and sent to work in the imperial palace, where she intends to keep her head down and just quietly do her work in the inner palace, only to find a little matter involving poison she can’t resist poking her nose into, leading a powerful young man in the palace to take notice of her. Throughout the story, her desire to mind her business and not get tied up in palace affairs wars with her absolutely insatiable curiosity wherever drugs or poisons are involved, and it leads her in and out of a series of mysteries involving the residents of the palace, changing the course of her life. It was an absolute treat to watch her and Jinshi dance around each other, as Maomao wants nothing to do with the beautiful man all the women fawn over, and he finds her lack of interest in him irresistible, and seeing the way all the seemingly unrelated mysteries built towards a larger conspiracy was immensely satisfying. When you combine all this with an equally colorful supporting cast, a gorgeous color palette, excellent background art, and solid animation, you get the sort of anime you feel lucky to get to watch. 9/10

First Runner-Up – Brave Bang Bravern!

Equal parts sincere and farcical, this series takes all the tropes and homoeroticism of mecha anime and dials them to eleven. It boasts some of the best 3D mecha animation I’ve seen, a star-studded voice cast, and a story with the perfect mix of comedy and action. If you’ve ever clapped your hands and cheered for an over the top robot fight, this is the show for you. 9/10

Second Runner-Up – Frieren: Beyond Journey’s End

The entire series is beautifully drawn and animated, with a perfect soundtrack and voice cast to match, and it takes a fantastic, heartfelt story about valuing the connections you make with others and elevates it to another level. A poorly paced exam arc in the second half that takes the focus off the main trio dampened my enjoyment somewhat, but it easily would’ve been my anime of the season in most seasons. 8/10

The Dangers in My Heart S2 – Kyotarou and Anna keep getting closer and closer over the course of this season, and the way they timed the emotional high of each episode to the soundtrack and the title card has me ready to swoon the moment I see the word “karte” written in white on a black screen. A nicely produced romance about a middle school boy and girl pushing each other to be their best selves that I’m really glad I watched. 8/10

Kingdom S5 – Xin and his Fei Xin force are under the command of the ruthless general Huan Yi in this arc, and they rediscover how merciless and inhumane war is as they fight a battle in Zhao territory as part of Qin’s effort to unify China. Xin’s voice actor completely knocks it out of the park here, delivering several emotional speeches with the perfect amount of gravitas. 8/10

7th Time Loop: The Villainess Enjoys a Carefree Life Married to Her Worst Enemy! – I knew when the female lead leapt off a balcony in front of the male lead after being jilted by her fiancé and he immediately fell in love with her that I was in for a good time, and it never let me down. Rishe’s constant scheming that drew on things she learned in her six previous lives, and Prince Arnold’s mix of bewilderment and affection for his unpredictable fiancée, made this one of the best fantasy romance series in years. 8/10

Mr. Villain’s Day Off – The premise of a general in the evil organization fighting the rangers for control of Earth strictly avoiding work on his day off sounds like the setup for a sit-com, but the story it actually settles in to tell is one that quietly highlights the beauty and comfort found in the ephemeral moments of daily life. A relaxing slice of life series that was the perfect capstone to my Sunday evenings this season. 7/10

A Sign of Affection – I have some nitpicks about some adaptation decisions in the anime that made the female lead appear less disabled than she is in the manga, but, on the whole, this was a lovely shoujo romance about a group of young adults doing their best to forge their own path in the world, with some nice production values. 7/10

Cherry Magic! Thirty Years of Virginity Can Make You a Wizard?! – If you can look past the wild title and premise, and you don’t mind some inconsistent character models or animation, there’s a nice workplace romance in here centered on a group of grown men talking things out and supporting each other as they navigate their messy feelings. (It’s not as funny as the manga is, though.) 7/10

Sengoku Youko – It took me a few episodes to warm up to this historical set fantasy adventure, but once the story got going, with a solid mix of strong character development and the occasional emotional punch to the gut, I was all in. The character designs are unique and expressive, the action is nicely choreographed and animated, and the voice actors really put their backs into some of the more intense moments. 7/10

Undead Unluck – The pacing was a bit of a problem, with some incredibly long recap segments in episodes in the second half, but the chemistry between the two leads – a man who can’t die and a young woman who causes life threatening bad luck to anyone who touches her – made this action series about fighting to stop the apocalypse a really fun time. 7/10

The Witch and the Beast – If you’re like me, and you go weak in the knees for a chain smoking man with bedroom eyes in a long coat, and a messy woman who might get you both arrested when you go out drinking, then this supernatural themed noir is the show for you. Production values are inconsistent over its run, but the writing and voice acting are solid throughout. 7/10

The Wrong Way to Use Healing Magic – A boy getting isekaied by accident when his classmates are summoned to be heroes in another world could easily have been the start of yet another story about an aggrieved loner making it big as an overpowered hero in a fantasy world, but it thankfully subverted expectations and delivered an isekai adventure with a bit of heart and a cast of likeable characters. 7/10

The Foolish Angel Dances with the Devil – What appeared to be a gimmicky battle of wits love comedy in the beginning turned into a solid forbidden romance between a demon and an angel with genuinely good chemistry between them. The two leads were easy to root for as they caught feelings for each other while fighting their way through the ridiculous situations they kept landing in. 7/10

The Demon Prince of Momochi House – This is a neither good nor bad anime about a teenage girl inheriting an old house in the woods that serves as a gateway between reality and the spiritual world, and moving in with the mysterious teenage boy and his ayakashi attendants who protect it. The characters are likeable, and the romance is pleasantly cheesy like an otome game, but the rushed pace of the relationship development and the quickly resolved yokai cases just feel like they adapted more manga than the runtime supported. 6/10

Villainess Level 99: I May Be the Hidden Boss but I’m Not the Demon Lord – Deadpan, autistic-coded Yumiella is a ton of fun as the OP main character in this otome isekai, and she and her love interest make a great couple, but the level grinding wasn’t exciting enough, and the jokes weren’t funny enough to overcome the poor visuals. 6/10

Bucchigiri?! – Hiroko Utsumi directing an original anime mixing old school delinquents with Aladdin and the Lamp sounded like it could be a rollicking fun romp in the style of her previous original, Sk8, but pacing issues led to a repetitive first half, the main character was deeply unlikable, and the rushed ending felt unsatisfying. The art and animation were generally quite good, with some great fight scenes, but the writing needed to be better. 6/10

Solo Leveling – The series is very well produced, with exciting action scenes set to a lively soundtrack, but any time I started to relax and enjoy some nicely animated fights, the main character would come out with some eye-rolling, angsty teen speech about the strong preying on the weak, and it just wasn’t for me. 6/10

Shangri-La Frontier – There’s little to criticize in the production of this VR MMO themed action series. The voice actors gave great performances, the monster fights are well animated, and the art has a distinctive feel to it. Unfortunately, the story just never really grabbed me, the stalker girl really annoyed me whenever she appeared, and the extras at the beginning and end of most episodes felt like padding. 6/10

My Instant Death Ability is So Overpowered, No One in This Other World Stands a Chance Against Me! – An unusual teenage boy with the ability to instantly kill anyone by just thinking about it gets sent to another world with a bus full of his classmates, and the ensuing adventure kept me entertained the whole time, but I can’t quite call it good. The manzai comedy dynamic between the male and female lead was a fair bit of fun as they traveled across the land, poking fun at common isekai tropes. 6/10

Blue Exorcist: Shimane Illuminati Saga – I remember really enjoying the first two seasons of this series, and I still love the characters, but this season just never clicked right for me. The opening arc felt rushed through, and the main arc had a cartoonish buffoon of a villain that completely undercut the horror of the story. It wasn’t a chore to watch or anything, but it could have been better. 6/10

Metallic Rouge – Like many others, I had high hopes for this original sci-fi series Bones put out as an anniversary project, but despite the generally solid visuals, the poor writing drags the whole show down, making this one of the biggest disappointments of the season. The incoherent plot fails to come to a point, the dialog is a terrible mix of forced quirkiness and tedious monologuing, and the characters are largely one-note and undeveloped. 6/10

Sasaki and Peeps – The hour-long premiere episode suggested this story about a middle aged salaryman who discovers his new pet bird is a reincarnated wizard from another world might be a fun take on the isekai genre, but the end product felt more like someone playing with their dolls than crafting a coherent story. It continually introduced new characters and new tropes all the way through to the last minute without tying anything together. 5/10

The Fire Hunter S2 – On the one hand, I appreciate how different it is from other series, with unusual character designs and an imaginative fantasy story that isn’t an amalgamation of light novel conventions. On the other hand, though, the production is incredibly rough, and the plot got increasingly hard to follow, making this a bit of a slog by the end. 5/10

Fluffy Paradise – I was basically on board in the first half to two-thirds of the series, when it seemed like a harmless little reincarnation isekai about a girl collecting animal and monster friends, but it completely lost me when it broke out the reservation camps and dead bodies in the last arc. Just a poorly written show that misunderstood its appeal. 5/10

#anime #winter anime 2024 #anime 2024 #the apothecary diaries #brave bang bravern #frieren #the dangers in my heart #7th time loop #mr. villain's day off #a sign of affection #kingdom #cherry magic!#sengoku youko

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