Lloyd Garmadon just said Link has the personality of a swing I love tomodachi life so much

I was halfway through my second Tetra-Pak® of oven-warmed (they say not to use the microwave) reduced-sodium chicken broth when I finally flipped to the editorial page of my neighbour’s newspaper. Those bastards in the government were sticking it to us again, with a planned “safety blitz” on the highway. You don’t need me to tell you, dear reader, what other fascist invented the concept of “the blitz.”

Now, you need to understand something about our local highway. It’s not like a real city’s. It has a bunch of jacked-up curves right in the middle, where they joined it together over successive projects as the city grew. Sometimes it’s six lanes. Sometimes it’s two. Exit lanes aren’t marked. Sometimes exit lanes are also merge lanes from a different highway. One section used to be part of the amusement park before all the fires. It’s a lot of fun, and the most fun part about it was that the traffic cops were afraid to be on the highway. Their union called it “really fucking unsafe.” With an endorsement like that, any safety operation, blitzkrieg or otherwise, would be bound to fail.

There’s another problem with the highway. During the week, it’s all commuters. Hardened drivers who know the rules of the road, and understand what to expect. They’ve been on it every day, in every weather condition. They can probably tell you every curve and bump, even if they don’t think of themselves as real drivers. Then you throw in some random asshole who doesn’t normally drive on the highway but just this once has to go across town at 9 A.M. to pick up Mister Floppykins’ anal wart medicine from the less racist of our two 24-hour vets. That random asshole – that normal person – immediately causes a twenty-five car pileup, forcing an intervention from law enforcement.

Of course, that’s a matter for the debate team. After the fact, those eggheads could argue that any enforcement operation barely scratched the surface of the law-breaking on-it-everyday speed demons who treated the highway like some kind of no-holds-barred carnage zone, a place where civility went to die and staying in your lane was practically unheard of. In reality, everyone knew the cops were catching some heat after letting the Mayor Himself’s Daughter Herself get away with a minor cocaine infraction when her gently-crashed Tesla saturation-bombed a popular downtown eatery with half-charged 18650 lithium-ion battery cells, and they needed to make some exhaust tickets in order to renew public confidence in their so-called institution.

They didn’t do it to me, of course, even though I was myself blitzed by the federales. That morning, I “had to” give my shark of an attorney, Max, a ride down south, so he could pick up a set of monogrammed cufflinks from the rotary (wrong kind, I asked) club. He’s too afraid to drive on the highway normally, you see, but he was all too willing to kick in for gas. I still will never know how he managed to turn “unjust widened-exhaust ticket” into the weeping officer handing his own badge and gun to Max.

LU Girl Scout AU (and subsequent PTA AU)

LU au where they have to pretend to be girl scouts because Time has to prove a point to the pta board and to the Karen Squad Its basically a bunch of highschoolers and singular college student pretending to be girl scouts because of both friendship and Time just shoved some sashes in their hands and said Y'all are all now girlscouts and offered to get them Chipotle as payment.

Twilight is in college(online). Warriors in a senior. Legend and Sky are juniors. Hyrule and Wild are sophmores. Four and wind are freshmen. Four is homeschooled by his grandfather though.   All are in a specila branch called hylia scouts (creative i know). This means they get set uniforms and competitions with other troops over cookie selling boundaries since hylia scout troops are usually very close to eachother. There are two troops in their area including them. Troop 4296 (the Links) and 6669 (the Karen Squad) They are troop 4296 because Time wouldnt let them have either 420 or 6969

Time--a pta mom--rivals with the Karens--tired as all hell but will not hesitate to prank the karens--troop leader and/or chaperone depending on the situation--He has a million bumper stickers supporting his "girls"--honestly he's just here for the cookies--someone get this man a coffee--has two sons according to the law, but has eight in spirit--you mess with his children he will not hesitate to murder you--all his sons are arsonists and he doesn't understand why--will call the links his "daughters". half the town can't tell what children he actually has--loves coupons and discounts "Malon said I'm not allowed to start fights at the pta meetings but I will not hesitate drag her here if you insult my beautiful brats again." Twilight­--Time's eldest son--only in this because he doesn't want his friends to get hurt and he loves his parents--a good boy--loves animals and will not hesitate to educate you on them--he wears overalls and if forced will wear a skirt over the overalls--he cant sell cookies for shit because nobody believes that he is a girlscout--sometimes has to duck down behind Four if certain people are around because they'll get suspicious--it does not work--He pretends to be everyone's big brother and they love him for it--perpetually confused by Wolfie "I have command over an army of teenagers and goats, nothing can stop me but gas money and my gpa." Wild--Time's second son--can pass as a girl pretty well--he destroys stuff during craft time--hot glues patches to sash--He has every one of the cooking patches and than some--Often seen with the camera photographing everything--Will help create new badges--give this boy a scavenger hunt and he will find you just about anything--has a tendency to ride on wild animals--isn't legally allowed to drive a car nor own a license. nobody knows why--second most convincing for this whole thing "This is just a glorified gang and honestly I am living for it." Four--from the neighboring farm but Twilight and Malon babysits him sometimes. he is a staple--the karens keeps trying to steal him because he is 'innocent' and 'a little lady'--this leads to ridiculous hijinks--he is small, quiet, not very mentally sound but he tries his best and is brave as all hell--owns the most badges--will rock the skirt always--fashionista or fashion disaster, there is no in-between--he's the most committed besides legend and warriors but is the most convincing--best cookie seller--Often seen handling sharp tools and knives for some reason, who gave this child a weapon?!--tends to befriend bad people--the only one with the fire safety badge even though, he to, is an arsonist--wears a vest because the sash is too big, Malon made it for him--has a bird named Ezlo who sits on his head "Sorry Miss Karen but I've been bribed with my first born child so kindly fuck off." Legend--salty and sassy--will always rock the skirt--also a fashionista and knows accessories--he's really only in this because of a running bet with warriors--he has a soft on the inside sometimes--he will get into cat fights--The other girlscouts from a rival troop HATE him because they will always lose arguments against him--knows the most about girl scouts, won't say how--Often seen blinged out with the jewelry he wins at the local chuck-se-cheese with his buddy Ravio "I have command over an entire troop of shortstacks and will not hesitate to order a strike against your fucking kneecaps. Do NOT question the authority of this skirt." Warriors--pretty boy--in a bet with Legend--also a fashionista--he is a big brother tho-- protection squad and trying his best--he is on student counsel and is a good leader--stand in when Time is busy--Often seen with a sports bag in one hand and a girl scout sash in the other--all the troops think he is a major lesbian because he keeps flirting with the other scouts--he gets more numbers as a girlscout, not that he could ever admit this "I'm a known lesbian among the girl scouts and honestly that is my crowning achievement." Sky--is here because his friends are here--He is the mom friend--second best at selling cookie because of his sweetness--He often tag teams with Four for selling cookies--is slightly confused but he's here to make sure nobody gets hurt--honestly just naps during meeting-- Often seen with blanket and a comforting hug--rival troops actually have scouts seeking out to befriend him--always forgets his skirt and is often seen borrowing his girlfriend Zelda's "Guys, please stop fighting you are all beautiful young women. Karen, you shut the frick up." Hyrule--the camper and nature boy of the group--he loves and has earned every patch for exploration and camping--tends to get lost--needs navigation patch--its been revoked from him twice--Humble and nice--often sleeps over at other peoples houses--nobody knows where he lives--it confuses the shit out of them--He is buddies with Four because Four knows the backwoods and roads the best--Often not seen due to being lost "Legend duck taped a gps to me arm and I think its lost to :(" Wind--baby boy--not as innocent as the others think--he absolutely loves being a girlscout--will play pranks on the other troops during jamborees and campouts--lives by the sea, slightly far away form everyone else--He helps with the nautical patches--hangs with the resident young delinquents, Tetra's gang. she thinks this is hilarious--he owns the troop wagon that they all use--its named King of the Red Lions or just Dave depending on the hour--only here because Twilight babysits him and his sister--also wears a vest because he thinks its cooler--Often seen with a telescope and covered in sand--someone give this child a bath "My first love may be the sea, but my second is that damned burrito, hand me the fucking skirt!" Wolfie--troop mascot--a giant half wolf half god knows what--has his own vest and patches-- has a tendency to just show up--Nobody knows where he comes from nor where he goes--he is the town cryptid and it isn't uncommon to see him pulling the troop wagon with the boys in it--Four still rides on his back--it counts as the horse back riding patch--Twilight is perpetually confused by him and its become a running gag that Wolfie is his fursona--loves cookies, sadly the cookies do not love him--can vaguely say curse words "arf" Shadow and Dark(I'm not sorry)--in karen's troop 6669 (for fun? for rivalry? who knows. they don't)--brothers--edgy bastards who are in a band together--Shadow is best friends with Four, Dark thinks he's pretty rad--Often seen with Four and the other edgy teens--both sassy, both easily pissed but trying to be kind of nice--Shadow is the only one who has achieved this--no those are not their real names, its Link and Link like everyone else in this goddamned town--HI MY nAME IS ebONY DArknESS DEMENTIA RAveN WAY--Dark is the author of My Immortal--both suck at selling cookies--tag team with Four to try and help their sales--rivals of troop 4296, they despise each other--both wear vests because Shadow wanted to match Four and Dark decided he can trick out the vest "Our mother may be a bitch and a dumbass, but at least we aren't petty white boys." "Wait Dark we are petty white boys" "FUCK" Karen Ganondorf Smith, Kaaren Link Johnson, Carhaen Reese--bitches and pta moms--runs the pta--the karen squad--Reese's daughter named Betghyani who is very nice and likes troop 4296--Johnson is mother of Shadow and Dark--they are fucking nuts y'all--they represent the three evils of the pta: the enforcer, the healthy diet extreme, and the bitch against disabled children (quiet hands!!!)--despite popular belief, Four (Link Smith) is in no way related to Karen Smith (legally at least. Karen thinks they are and it doesn't end pretty sometimes)--they all hate Time with a burning passion because he is not afraid to call them out on their bullshit "I've brought up so many stances and rules into this pta and will not have some farming hooligan upstaging the careful work me and the other heads have created!" Malon--couldn't be on pta because she almost murdered a karen with kindness--sweet and kind but can still kick ass--helped make and fix uniforms--acts as chaperone when needed and finds this all completely hilarious--she makes snacks with Wild for the meetings--has adopted all of these children--actively enforces Wind and Four to eat more because whY ARE ALL YALL SO TINY--can lift a cow "Don't talk to me or my husband or my son or my son or my eight fake sons or my lovely eight fake daughters ever again."

Eleanora Bio

“There are still so many mysteries of the place we all live in, and I want to solve as much of it as I can in my life time, and if at all possible, a next life time.”

TW: Bullying

Basic Information

Name: Eleanora

AKA:  Ellie, Nora, Ellen, Elora, Ella, Gayby, L, basically any nickname people give her

Occupation: Alola’s Pokemon Champion

DOB: March 9

Age: 11

Species: Human

Pokemon: 

Aquo, level 72 male Hasty Primarina that takes plenty of siestas

Gluth, level 63 male Modest Snorlax that likes to fight 

Prancer, level 63 male Docile Oricorio that is somewhat vain 

Sally, level 63 male Bold Salazzle that is somewhat of a clown 

Jangle, level 63 male Naive Kommo-o that is proud of his power

Nebby, level 63 male Bashful (Verse dependent) that is mischievious 

Nationality: Kantonian

Gender/Pronouns: Cis Female/She

Romantic/Sexual Orientation: Pan

Threat Level: Low

Physical Information

Face Claim: Herself

Height: 4′4

Weight: 79 lbs

Eye color: Pale icy blue

Hair color: Strawberry blonde

Skin color: Pale before moving to Alola, a bit tanner from her time being out and about on Alola with rosy cheeks and freckles

Dominant Hand: Right

Distinguishing Features: Her wild hair and the bandages on her legs

Physical Condition: none

Accent and Intensity: None notable

Tattoos: none

Scars: none

Piercings: none

Glasses: none

Background Information

Hometown: Fuchsai City, Kanto

Current Residence: Hau’oli Outskirts, Melemele Island, Alola Region

Social Class: Middle

Basic Education: Trainer’s School

Parent 1: [insert the name of the player’s mom here]

Parent 2:  ???

Ship: none

Siblings: none

Adopted?: Yes

Rap Sheet?: No

Prison Time?: No

Backstory:

Eleanora was orphaned at the age of one. However, at age 3, her current mother and father had adopted her. 

It was when she was taken home did she realize she could understand Pokemon when met with the family’s Meowth. When telling her parents, they didn’t really believe her. At age 5, when she was enrolled in school, her father started becoming more scarce in her life. While school seemed alright at first, many of the children quickly grew annoyed with her, because of her being way too talkative. As a result, they either ignored her, or bullied her into shutting up. Her mother always told her to keep smiling, as smiling would make even the bleakest of situations brighter. In the meantime, she had talked with the staff to do something to protect her daughter. 

Unfortunately, the bullying only got worse when she had one day admitted to being able to understand Pokemon. They had viewed her as crazy. One particularly malicious child had forcibly cut her hair. While that kid was expelled for it, the bullying issues still continued, causing her to grow more distant from humans, and talking with Meowth pushed her closer to Pokemon. 

When her father became basically non existent in the family’s life, her mother decided it was time to move. At one point, her mother saw Professor Kukui in the Indigo League and saw his Alolan Pokemon. Knowing that Eleanora loved Pokemon, she decided that she’d love to go there and have Alolan Pokemon of her own. 

So she contacted the Professor, and asked him to get to know her daughter and basically pump her up for moving to Alola. And thus, her Alolan journey began.

Now the first champion of Alola, Eleanora is spending her days more thoroughly exploring Alola, completing the Pokedex, looking for remaining Zygarde cells and cores, assisting the UB Task Force, and somewhat considering traveling other regions. She is always up to battle, or just generally lending a hand to anyone that asks.

Personality Information

Jungtype: ENFP-T

Subtype: IEE-Fi

Enneatype: Type 4 Wings 5w3

Moral Alignment: Lawful Good

Temperament: A mix of Sanguine and Phlegmatic

Anger: Cold

Schemata: Abandonment/Instability (AB), Social Isolation/Alienation (SI), Approval Seeking/Recognition Seeking (AS)

Intelligence Type: Intra-personal (self smart)

IQ: 107

Deterioration: Desire to be valuable (deteriorates to chasing success

Mental Condition: ADHD

Vices and Habits

Violent?: No

Addictions?: none

Self-Destructive?: Occassionally

Habits: Tends to run her mouth when excited or nervous, Picks up people’s attitudes and/or habits after hanging around them for a while

Hobbies:

Exploring

Battling

Star gazing

Cloud watching

Likes:

Pokemon

The sky

Astronimy

Flowers

Grooming

Reading

Cuddles

Lore

Dislikes:

Swimming

Bullies

Small spaces

Losing

Her hair being touched without permission

Feeling stuck

Tics: Smiles even despite emotions most of the time

Obsessions: Exploring, Meeting new Pokemon

Compulsions: Brings her attention to something else without warning (low attention span in other words)

Verses

The Sun Verse- Pretty normal. Only thing notable is that Nebby is Solgaleo

The Moon Verse- Where apparently she’s nocturnal. Nebby is Lunala in this verse

The Ultra Verse- Until I finish Ultra Sun, TBA

The Robin Verse- More or less the same as the other Verses, except she chose Rowlet as a starter and named him Robin. Later on, before the festival in Iki Town, she found an injured Eevee named Tetra that was holding a Thunder Stone, which evolved into Jolteon soon after she was caught. Other than that and these two becoming the main members of her team, her adventure really has not changed. Robin and Tetra belong to @cyberdragonharmony