#mr snarky smarty pants | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

seventxentexntxen · 4 years

Text

One of Us Is Lying

(mentions of blood, mild language)

hwang yeji

Yeji walked to the history room, gloominess obvious on her face and in her demeanor as she dragged her duffel behind her instead of putting it on her shoulder. After getting chewed out by the coach for getting detention and missing practice, she felt as though it really could not get worse. She'd have to apologize to coach, run laps around the football stadium until she collapsed, and then lay sore in bed until she could breathe without pain.

It was only worse when Jaemin joined her as she walked, the person who got her here in the first place.

"Turn that frown upside down, Number One!" He said cheerfully, bouncing as he walked.

"Don't call me that." 'Number One' was the name she earned after being the player of the season in softball, basketball, and track. "It's your fault I'm in this mess."

"How is it my fault?" His cheerful face suddenly turned into a comical frown. "I didn't yell at the teacher and call him names in front of the entire class." His face immediately turned into a devious grin.

“He wouldn't let me go get my spare medication and he tried to make me empty my backpack because he didn't believe I had run out!" Yeji exclaimed, then took in a few deep breaths to calm herself down. "If you hadn't messed with him in the first place, he wouldn't have been that irritated."

"How's that shoulder of yours anyway? You've been popping those pills for a hell of a while," he insinuated, wiggling his eyebrows and changing the subject.

"They're mild painkillers, Jaemin. Not enough to get you high." At least, that's what she imagined mild painkillers were like.

"Ladies first," Jaemin said, opening the door to the classroom with a dramatic bow.

She walked inside without a word and sat in the middle of the classroom away from the other punished students in the room. She had to do a double-take when she saw Kim Namjoon and Jang Yeeun looking very down-trodden in front of her.

"Whoa! What's Mr. Smarty-pants and Ms. Perfect doing in here?" Jaemin exclaimed, leaning against Namjoon's desk.

"I lost my homework," he muttered, his face turning a bright red.

"Someone shredded the homecoming posters and I'm the only student with a key to the student lounge so they blamed it on me," Yeeun said, haughtily. "Even though I tried explaining that someone swiped my key almost a week ago."

"Yeah, and I didn't glue Mr. Yang's wheely chair to the ground so he would fall out when he tried to roll in it," Jaemin said with a snort. "What about you Mr. Perfect and Your Majesty?" He asked, looking at Hong Joshua and Park Chaeyoung respectively.

"Nothing!" Chaeyoung exclaimed, a little too fast.

"They caught her making out with Suho in the teacher's lounge," Chanyeol said, dropping a Sour Patch Kid into his mouth.

She whipped around so fast her blonde hair hit him in the face.

"No way!" Yeji exclaimed, leaning forward. She was good friends with his little brother Sehun and was surprised he didn't tell her.

"We weren't making out, though!" She exclaimed, fanning her bright red face. "Honest! He was asking me for test answers!"

"No one would ask you for test answers," Namjoon said and Chaeyoung flipped him off.

"I fell asleep in class," Joshua said, running a hand through his unkept hair.

Jaemin opened his mouth, probably to make some snarky remark, but before he could, the door burst opened and in walked Simon followed by the history teacher, Ms. Lee who was positively fuming.

"I don't want a sound, a whisper, a movement from you while you are here!" She exclaimed, obviously peeved she had to stay after school to watch us. Namjoon lowered his head in shame and Jaemin immediately sat straight as a board.

"I want you to write me a carefully worded, three page essay -front and back- over the importance of good behavior," she gave us all a long once-over then picked up her attendance paper.

"Hong Joshua." He jerked awake long enough to feebly raise a hand, then his chin hit his chest once more.

"Hwang Yeji." She raised her hand as she spun a basketball on her middle finger.

"Jang Yeeun." She gave a crisp "Here!" before beaming at the teacher who looked unimpressed.

"Kim Namjoon." He lifted his pencil for her to see, then quickly put it back down.

"Na Jaemin." He remained perfectly still until the teacher dropped her papers with a sigh. "You can move, Jaemin, just not excessively." He slouched and began panting like he had held his breath the whole time and Yeji rolled her eyes.

"Park Chanyeol." He threw another candy piece into the air and caught it with his mouth open. "Throw it away," Ms. Lee snapped before Chanyeol sighed and pushed the bag into his backpack.

"Park Chaeyoung." She did her prom queen wave before clearing her throat.

"You can just call me Rosé. Everyone does." She flipped a lock of blonde hair over her shoulder and Yeeun rolled her eyes.

"Simon Zimmerman."

Our eyes went to the strange foreign-exchange student who had made a reputation of himself by being a freaking weirdo. Not only was he super reclusive, but he had a bad habit of finding out people's secrets and then spreading them all around the school. He even had his own cork board in the middle of the student lounge dedicated to posting the gross secrets. Yeeun had taken it down multiple times, but each time, it was back up the next day, despite her having the only key.

He raised a hand, his dark eyes casting glances to the other students before dropping it back to his lap. Even the teacher seemed slightly unnerved as she ticked him off her list.

"Great. Now that we're done with that, start on your essays," she said, as tight as the bun at the back of her head.

Namjoon had been writing since his name was called, and was already on the back of his first page. The rest of them looked around uncertainly, not wanting to write, until the time stretched longer with no interruptions.

Yeji picked up her pencil and began writing her name, when a glorious knock resounded from the door. Ms. Lee stood and opened the door, but no one was there. She furrowed her brow and looked outside, but to no avail. The knock resounded again, and she realized it was coming from the window.

"Simon, open the window, please," She said in an annoyed voice as someone knocked on both the door and the window.

Simon stood and leaned over his desk to open the window, but before he could, the lights shut out completely.

There was a scared yelp and then the noise of fists banging on the window boomed even louder. Someone screamed. Another person bumped so violently into Yeji's desk, she fell out and his her head on the floor. She let out a strangled cry and cradled her head as the banging continued. She could hear footsteps, loud voices, and desks being moved in a panicked frenzy.

Yells of confusion and panic resounded as she stood, shakily, feeling the desks until she found the wall and flipped the light switch. Miraculously, it turned on. She never saw someone turn it off.

Yeji spun around as Rosé screamed and recoiled so much, she tripped over a fallen desk that sent her sprawling to the floor.

"Oh, shit!" Jaemin said, taking a few steps back.

Yeji rushed to the other side of the room, pushing Yeeun out of the way and gasped as she saw Simon in front of her, a pool of blood collecting under his fallen body.

—————

I wrote this with some help from @iwritekisses I hope you like it!

15 notes · View notes

stalwartsandall · 5 years

Text

Spuffy Fic Recs

Am in a streamline-y, KonMari mood, so I decided to pull all my fic recs together into one post. So, forty Spuffy fics that spark joy...

Short(er) Fics

Not My Boyfriend by allmadinhere - Gorgeous, compact nugget of a story concept that ticks along with the perfect blend of tension and humour.

Closer by TheHouseKeeper - Poetic, awkward and beautiful post-NFA reunion story. It's Spuffy all growed up.

The Sharing Game by stuffandnonsense - Our post-series heroes teeter on the precipice between friends and lovers. My favourite kind of fic: rafts of wonderful dialogue with deep, insightful dives into character and relationship history.

Spike's Demon vs. Pants by ChryshCn - A delicious confection of a story - funny, sweet and smutty. Utterly edible. Also, if there exists a more perfect Spuffy fic title, I haven't heard it.

Something New by joycometh - Spike has a post Something Blue ponder. And an erection. A poke at Spike's season four psyche with clever turns of phrase, evocative description and lovely character insight.

Still Point by kalima - My favourite take on the Chosen fade to black scene. Pithy, pointed and properly good.

Ketchup Blood by kalima - Reiterating my point above re the proper goodness of kalima's writing. Divine post-coital chat set in season six. At Denny's.

Encapsulated by BillieLiar - Decidedly yummy take on the forced-to-share-a-hotel-room trope.

Daybreak by Sigyn - Gorgeous bit of writing. Intimate and specific and leaves one wanting to hug Spike until his bones creak.

Awake by betty crachit - Glaringly fab take on Spike (equal parts stoic, stumbling and smarty-pants in the face of adversity) with reams of crunchy, clever language. That the story also has a rock solid plot and a dollop of gorgeous smut is just plain showing off in my opinion.

New Year by Sigyn - A tender little season seven moment that digs into the nuances of Spike's soul. Plus there's cribbage.

Phone Call by anaross - Heart-smoosher of a oneshot that speaks to my nagging suspicion that Buffy would not ever really let herself love Spike.

The Day the World Turning Day-Glo by stuffandnonsense - Spike’s ex-girlfriends have a chat. It’s exactly and entirely as wonderful as it sounds.

6am by acekoomboom - Buffy mourns Spike. Unflinching and punch packing.

In Such a Night by Dactylgirl - Exquisite, aching, body-cinching UST.

Comfort & Joy by Dactylgirl - Yet more exquisite UST (plus bonus lovely Giles and charming Scoobies).

Mr Talky Mouth by kalima - Luscious, lascivious, languid, lubricious—just all the L words really—little oneshot.

Cold by Sigyn - The filthiest, grittiest, prettiest language in Spuffidom.

Gunning for Buffy by the_moonmoth - Season five bite-y perfection.

Black Hole Confessions by OffYourBird - For anyone who watches the morning after scene in Wrecked and habitually hears the mental 'Good God, The Writers Arsed Up The Destroyed House Metaphor' klaxon... this story is the perfect fix-it. Metaphor (and character) done right.

Left for Yesterday by the_moonmoth - This WIP is just a wee, chapter-long nugget of setup but the_moonmoth is so flinging-flanging good that I don't begin to care. Her writing, dialogue and character-work are all shot through with charm, wit and warmth. Oh, and she swears thoroughly, properly and creatively.

You Came Back by FlightsofFancy - This story is just a lovely lovely lovely lovely lovely (repeat ad nauseam) continuation of the Hell's Bells scene. It perfectly captures and builds on the soft (green) glow of the pair in the moment.

Reciprocal by the_moonmoth - Divine smut and such deft timeline-manipulation that builds and maintains tension with fierce precision.

Long(er) Fics

Uncontrollable by sweetprincipale - Spike replaces Riley in the spiritually-compelled-to-boink-room during Where the Wild Things Are. Fuck or Die trope to the nth-iest of delicious nth degrees.

Indigo Overture by Rikki-oko - Beautifully paced and punchy romance with skilfully crafted characters. AH enemies to lovers trope done so, so right!

The Ewer of Enheduanna by the_moonmoth - Entirely different story, but I can echo my praise for Reciprocal - divine smut and such deft timeline-manipulation that builds and maintains tension with fierce precision. Also, it's just sodding wonderful.

Rules of The Road by Gort - Roadtrip-y, slow burn-y, build-of-affection-and-trust WIP. A story that takes the end of season five in a different direction but still feels wholly true to character.

College is Awesome by dampersandspoons - This AH story captures perfectly the clumsy, all-consuming teen desire for sex, connection and acceptance. It's also one of the funniest fics I've ever read. It's also loveable-sexy-nerd-William fic. It's also a rare example of a story in which the male romantic lead is cautious, clever and kind rather than masterful, all knowing and presuming. And, also, the smut is wonderful.

In For a Penny by bewildered and the_moonmoth - Spike time travels back to season four and good lordy does that make me happy. A WIP with lashings of snarky Giles and fabulously put-upon Spike.

Monsters by betty cratchit - A perfect UST-laden season four caper by an author with the most melodious and charming writer's voice ever in ever. Perma WIP.

Beyond the Pale by FlightsofFancy - The most intriguing Initiative plot I've ever read. Conflict aplenty and top shelf character voices. The fab action sequences are just the icing on this WIP cake.

Books and Their Covers by JustTiff - A delectable AH take on Spike in a story with a beautifully calibrated slow, cinching, flirty build-up.

Ex Magic by bookishy - Deft writing, rock solid character voices, and a season seven plot that just bellows with interesting/clever/smutty potential. It’s the WIP I’m most excited to see continued.

In Heat by Nautibitz - This fic was my intro to both fanfic and smut. Even if it were shite, I'd still be sentimentally attached and rec the stuffing out of it. But it's not shite, not even close; it is, in fact, sublime.

Thursday's Child by Zabjade - Trauma and ensemble-y interaction and gender dynamics and gentle domesticity and high drama and moral complexity and slow build affection. Read it! Read it, I say!

Care by Sigyn - Good god this is a good premise: the Something Blue spell doesn't break and Buffy & Spike marry. What this is not is a breezy story making use of Spuffy's convenient canon engagement to make 'em bone ad infinitum. (Not that there's anything wrong with those stories; I personal eat those stories up with a spoon). But what Sigyn creates here is something more complex, clever and considered. She ducks none of the couple's flaws/impediments/limitations and ultimately she earns the bejesus outta the couple's happy ending.

Ever Sun, Ever Moon by St Ephiny - This WIP is absolutely laced was fraught, palpable tension and it's just heart-thumpingly good. St Ephiny is such a fabulous storyteller—handling character, timelines, dialogue and action with such aplomb—that she's able to push the characters to emotional extremes and still have them feel entirely grounded, believable and true.

My Life Closed Twice by anaross - The most delicious, articulate, nuanced, moral, tough, bitchy, swoon-inducing iteration of Spike in fanfic.

Ketchup and the Crocodile by yellowb - Post resurrection, Buffy runs away to New York. A beautiful, subtle and deliciously genuine story.

Crash and Burn by Nautibitz – AH. Brat meets brat. Fun and funny and fucking hot.

#buffy the vampire slayer #spuffy #fic rec

121 notes · View notes