The Deadlights: I'm singing to You
Bill didn't know why Audrie insisted they go to the Deadlights concert together. Sure, Bill was going to go anyways, he always did. He never missed a chance to see his friends play, he was loyal after all. But she insisted that she goes too. Throwing excuses like "I've never been to a concert" and "you go alone all the time". Which he doesn't, he usually goes with the other losers, hanging out in the crowd.
But Bill, is a nice guy. He agrees. He liked making sure others were happy, and Audrie should be included in that. After all, they are... dating? Bill doesn't know if he can call it that. It's mostly her dragging him around, holding his hand, and trying to auck his face off. It made Bill a little uncomfortable. He was never into public displays of affection, especially when it comes to a girl he met at a record store. He was just trying to buy an album to show to Stan later that night, but she somehow convinced him to go out instead.
What's worse, is the other Losers, did not particularly like her. She was too clingy for Eddie, too loud for Mike, too possessive for Beverly, too flirtatious for Richie, she was mean to Ben, and even though Stan put on an act, Bill could see right through it. Stan never explained why he didn't like her, he just didn't. Which, of course, made it hard for Bill to invite and and the losers to things. It was like he was always choosing between them, and he hated it. "Losers stick together" always in the back of his mind, haunting him whenever he was out with Audrie.
But tonight, he didn't have to worry. The Losers were already at the concert when Bill was picking Audrie up. It was the perfect set up, nothing was gonna go wrong. At least so he thought before he saw Audrie's outfit. She had a red bralette, jeans that could technically pass for shorts with how big the holes were in them, chokers and necklaces galore, and red sandal heels. She twirled in the outfit, obviously feeling herself in it. Who was Bill to crush that? He did point out that heels might be a bit uncomfortable, since they'll be sanding the whole night. But she reassured him, she could handle it. "If anything I can sit on your shoulders," she giggled, flipping her deep brown, almost black, hair.
When they finally met up with the other Losers, Bill was more late than he wanted to be. Ben, Beverly, and Eddie were laughing, holding water bottles in their hands and comparing "The Deadlights" merch they were sporting. Beverly had hers so big it could be a dress on her, covering her shorts, and the sleeves ending on her elbows, but didnt show any cleavage. Richie had explained he got the shirt that way, specifically for Beverly to match her style. Ben was wearing his as a sweatshirt. He had lost some weight since they were kids, but he wasn't exactly confident in how he looked yet. Bill and the others tried to praise him for how good he looked, but he probably chalked it up to "being nice". Eddie had his tied up, like a crop top. It looked like he did it quickly though, using one of Beverly's hair ties, meaning his mom most likely didn't know. It showed his tummy, but not much since he always wore his bottoms on his waist.
Eddie was the first to notice Bill and Audrie. Of course he was. His face went from a warm, friendly greeting, to a sour "Why is she here?" expression. He always put his emotions right on his face for everyone to see. It made Bill want to hide in the crowd and wait til the storm was over.
Ben, noticing Eddie's expression, turned to Bill and Audrie. His expression was a bit more hidden. But his eyes kept shifting to the stage as if he was trying to avoid a conflict that Bill didn't get the memo for.
Finally Bev, looking directly at Bill. She crossed her arms, blowing her red curly bangs out of her hair, tilting her head. Bill felt Audrie hold his arm close to her. Bill had explained to her that Beverly didn't have any intentions with him. They had one kiss as kids, but that was it. Now they were just friends, like the rest of the Losers. But with how Beverly was glaring right now, Audie would never believe them.
Before Bill could even explain himself, the stage lights flickered. He knew that meant they were coming on. He sighed in relief as the others turned their attention to the stage. Once the concert was over, he'd part ways, take Audrie home and then curl in his bed, blaring music until the day was over.
Mike walked out first, clapping his drumsticks together and waving at the audience, before climbing up to his drum set and banging it as a warm up greeting. Richie walked out next, but something was off.
Usually when richie came out he would play around with the audience. Fake stoking his bass, yelling into his mic, giving them high fives. He was the hype man of the century. But this time he walked straight to his mic, didn't yell, didn't get the crowd cheer more than they already were. This time he wasnt even holding the bass, but the guitar, something he rarely ever did. He just stood there, eyes on the ground. Even Eddie noticed something was off, from what Bill could tell, as he stopped cheering looking concerned.
Then Stan took the stage. His shoes clipping the stage as he walked, somehow louder than the screaming girls around Bill. His eyes focused on him, almost in shock. He knew that expression, that walk, that flannel. He stared at Stan, confused. Why was he in Stan's flannel? Why did he look so defeated? Angry? Bill rubbed his eyes, thinking he imaged it. But the sight before him didn't change.
Audrie pulled his arm a bit, giggling. "Wow, Stan looks good huh?" She asked, looking at Bill. Bill nodded looking at her, but didn't say anything. When he turned his gaze back to the stage, it was like he and Stan were looking directly at one another. Bill could see every emotion Stan was feeling in his face. At least in his eyes as his mouth formed a teeth filled smile. Bill could hear Stan talking from the mic but couldn't tell what he was saying, almost like Stan was speaking a different language.
When they started playing, Bill felt his heart drop. It was like Stan sung directly to him. He used to, before the Deadlights, before everything. They would sit in Stan's room, just the two of them, and Stan would sing to him. He was like an angel then, soft lyrics, soft guitar notes only harmonizing with him, his brown eyes locked on Bill's. It made his heart flutter and beat like a hummingbird was trapped in his rib cage. But now, it felt like daggers trying to piece him.
They lyrics were full of pain and emotion. His eyes filling with tears, his grip on the mic so tight the white of his knuckles was obvious. Bill wanted to rush the stage, hold Stan and clobber whoever made Stan feel this way. He looked to Richie, trying to get a clue of what was going on. But richie showed an angry expression, he didn't sing, he just played the guitar, eyes glaring at Bill. Why was he glaring so much at him?
Oh.
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CARTOON LOONACY #102 underground comix STAN SAKAI Vojtko MAHERAS Buniak APA 2010
New in the Poopsheet Shop: CARTOON LOONACY #102, cartoonist APA with a cover by Gary Fields.
Legendary cartoonists’ APA club. The print run for this issue was around 25 copies.
Comics and art by contributors Gary Fields, Darren Auck, Brian Buniak, Russ Maheras, Jim Siergey, Jim Ryan, Richard Krauss, Bob Vojtko, Pete Fitzgerald, Bruce Chrislip, George Erling and Mike Kraiger.
Some contents include: obituary and tributes for Jamie Alder (AKA Bill Shut); reproduction of a 1984 Albedoflyer…
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