#kakashi modern au | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

detectivestucks · 3 months

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Brat Taming

18+ Content, Minors do NOT interact

Pairing: Kakashi x F!Reader

Summery: Modern AU Kakashi is your arrogant and creepy step brother. One night while your parents are out of town you come home from a night of partying only to find Kakashi in your room, ready to make you pay for all your cheeky comments

Warnings: NSFW, NONCON, Stepcest, Toxic Kakashi, brat taming, oral, fingering, unprotected penetration, choking, anal play, facial, hair pulling, harsh spanking, under age drinking.

Word Count: 4.6k

Anon Ask

When your mom married Sakumo three years ago you thought your Clueless fantasy was about to come true. Your new step brother, Kakashi, was stupid hot. He was blessed with a gorgeous angular face, deep brown eyes, thick silky silver hair and a mouthwatering scar over his left eye. He loved to walk around the house either in fitted muscle tanks or shirtless with only loose gray sweats, showing off his chiseled frame. On top of that he had big masculine hands with perfectly manicured fingers that you would daydream about grazing your most sensitive areas. He was going to be your Josh and you were Cher waiting for him to fall madly in love with you.

Only it turned out he was a complete and total ass.

Soon after your parents got together he had been accepted to Harvard and loved to lord over everyone what a genius he is. You quickly grew a distaste for the prick and got cheeky whenever he felt the need to remind you of his superiority.

Currently you are a freshman in college starting your second semester at UMass. You chose to live at home to keep your mom company since you didn’t like the idea of living in a tiny dorm room with some random roommate you didn’t know. Kakashi on the other hand, just got kicked out of the dorms last semester and was finishing his Junior year at home with you and your parents.

It turns out you were not the only person he liked to mouth off to. He got into several arguments with many of his dorm mates and the RA. Eventually he was banned from on-campus housing and now you were left to suffer through daily interactions with the world's most annoying step brother.

Always his insufferable self, recently Kakashi has been extra creepy. He seems to have forgotten what a shirt is and rarely had one on his back. Sometimes you thought you caught him palming himself out of the corner of your eye and you would catch him staring at you when you get ready to go out with your friends. Most annoyingly, sometimes he’d hang out in your bedroom when you were trying to get ready for bed.

“Can I help you?”

“Just making sure you’re not so brain dead that you forgot how to put on pants. I know it can be hard for some people.”

“Oh is that so? Cause I was just making sure you didn't forget how to shut your mouth. I know it can be hard for some people.”

“Careful, now. You should really mind who you’re speaking to that way.”

“Sorry, I don’t take kindly to creeps who think I’m too stupid to put on pants. Is that why they kicked you out? Cause you were trying to show girls how to put on their pants?”

Kakashi furiously charged up to you and got right in your face. You were scared but you weren’t gonna show him that. Instead you glare at him.

“Watch it kid or you’ll find yourself in a world of trouble.”

“Threats don’t work with me big bro. Try again some other time.”

Angry, he left the room. Closing his door with a snap.

It had been like this for weeks. His unwelcome presence always looming around. You hated the way he looked at you. It was like he was hunting for a reason to tear you down. Whether it was your degree, your ‘public university’ education, or your slutty outfit choices. The guy needed a life. Most of the time you’d quip back but sometimes you just didn’t have the energy and instead roll your eyes. Tonight was one of those nights. Sakumo and your mom were out of town on a romantic getaway so you were going out while Kakashi tried to lord over you as the ‘man of the house.’

“Ah you going to see your boy toy? You know you’re never going to get a respectable man dressed like that.”

“I’m not going to see any boy toy, I’m going out with my friends.”

You see him give a smug smirk at your answer

“Besides, it’s not up to you if I’m looking for a respectable man or not. Maybe I’m not looking for one at all.”

“So just looking to be a little whore. I see how it is.”

You glare at him before rolling your eyes.

“I’m out. See you later, loser.”

You catch Kakashi’s face paint in fury as you leave. He hated how you constantly try to undermine him. He hated that you were such a brat. And he truly hated how no one ever put you in your place.

********************************************

You loudly came home at 2am from partying with your friends. You were a little inebriated and stumbled to the kitchen to get water before heading upstairs to bed. You make your way up the stairs, tripping over your high heels. You get to your bedroom and when you turn on the light you see Kakashi already laying in your bed.

“Seriously, what’s your problem?”

“I have no problem. I’m not the one getting home at 2 am after a night of underage drinking.”

You were hit with a wave of sobriety at his words. If he told your mom, you’d be screwed. Seeing your expression, he knew he had you cornered. Kakashi stands up and walks past you as if he’s leaving the room, putting himself between you and the door before changing his mind and closing it.

“Remember when I said you should watch it?”

He turns to you, taking a step forward. You begin to stumble backwards towards the bed.

“You’re such a filthy brat” he spits.

You continue to stumble backwards, your heels slipping off your feet.

“And there's nothing I love more than putting a brat in her place.”

Your eyes widen in fear as you see a dark smile stretch across his face. Calves hitting the bed, you fall down to the floor and Kakashi weaves his strong hands into your hair, pulling it back so you’re forced to stare up at him. Your mind hazy, you begin to realize exactly how he imagines putting you in your place and it causes you to tremble.

He tugs down his sweatpants and pulls out his length. Its weight slaps you in the face with a heavy thud. You flinch in his grasp but his fingers tighten in your locks as he begins beating you with his manhood.

“Drunk little girls like you don’t deserve to brush their teeth with a toothbrush. They only get to brush their teeth with cock. Now open that brat mouth for me.”

“No!”

Kakashi spits on your face. “I said open”

In your outrage you open your mouth about to hurl an insult at him when he shoved himself between your lips and pushed your head all the way down to his stomach. You were gagging and retching around him. You pushed against his thighs with all your might but your pathetic drunken arms were no match for his robust muscular physique.

“That’s it. Choke on my cock you twerp.”

He groaned as he feels you constrict around his tip in an attempt to swallow air. Your eyes were tearing up from oxygen deprivation and your entire body was rigid in your struggle. He roughly pulls you up and down on him, pummeling your throat with a manhood much too large for your mouth. You feel your jaw lock as you open wide, tears falling freely from your eyes.

He pulls you off of him and slaps your drool and tear drenched face.

“Look at you. Just a little slut swallowing me so good. It seems college has at least taught you how to swallow dick so I guess your tuition has been put to good use.”

Your chest is heaving as you gulp down fresh air, seeing two of him with inebriated eyes while the pain of your hair being pulled registers in your hazy mind.

“Again.”

He plummets into your mouth once more, fucking your face while you choke. Drool dribbling past your lips and down the front of your dress. He threatens you,

“Don’t even think about running to mommy. I’ll tell her all about how drunk you were and how you came onto me and you’ll be grounded and not allowed to see your little friends for the rest of the semester. Got it?”

He shakes your head with the hand grasping your hair. You whine ‘yes’ with a full mouth as you cry out from the pain. He retreats from your throat and you cough while he shoves you face down on your bed. He bends you over its edge, ass facing him. You desperately bring your hands to the back of your head, trying to pull off the hand tangled in your hair. He pushes you down into the mattress with force majeure and you sob from your dishonorable predicament.

“Resisting is futile little sis. This is what happens to brats who don’t know their place.”

He pulls up the skirt of your mini dress and yanks down your strappy thong.

“Who are you wearing this slutty underwear for, huh? I thought you weren’t going to meet up with any boys” you hear a hum of amusement from his chest. “Did you wear this for me?”

“Fuck off” you choke.

“Ah, you see? You shouldn’t have said that.” He spreads your legs and brings his hand up to forcefully slap your sex. You yelp and flinch.

“This is the very attitude I was talking about sis.” He slaps you again, this time harder.

“Someone’s gotta beat this out of you.” He slaps you again, this time with significant strength.

Kakashi catches some arousal dripping out of you when he removes his hand from your folds. He lets out a chuckle. “Seems like you’re enjoying this.”

His words burn you with embarrassment and reignite your struggles till he plunges his fingers inside of your gummy cunt. You gasp at his uninvited intrusion. He feels around, stroking in and out, coating his knuckles in your secretions. As he toys with you he hits your sweet spot and an involuntary groan spills past your lips.

“Oh, you like that, huh?”

You shake your head ‘no’ but when he does it again you moan once more, walls tightening around his fingers. He pulls out of you and spanks your cheek causing you to cry.

“You’re not supposed to enjoy it brat.” he snarls before sinking his fingers into you again.

He maliciously milks your sweet spot, driving you to a crazed state. You struggle to refrain from moaning but if you fail and a cry slips past your lips be brings a heavy palm down on your rear with so much force that the red handprints quickly turn purple. He repeats the torturous process till you are thrashing in his grasp and he has to pull you up by your hair to pin you down on the bed with his body weight on top of you to stop your struggle.

Kneeling on either side of your arms, weight on your chest, he can see the mascara run down your cheeks. He swells with pride seeing you made messy by his hands. He shoves himself back into your mouth. You kick and try to push him off of you but he has no patience for your misbehavior. He reaches behind himself and gives you a slap between your legs.

Your resulting squeal vibrates along his shaft. A pleasured growl rumbles from his chest so he continues to reach around, beating against your cunt while he thrusts in and out of your mouth.

Your fingers begin to dig into him, scratching up his legs as you desperately try to get him off of you. He rips himself from your mouth and grabs you by your wrists.

“You wanna play rough, sis? I can give you rough.”

He gives you a shit eating grin as he leans all his weight on your restrained wrists and uses his knees to spread your legs. You feel the heat of his length rub against your folds as he gets his body into position. You quickly realize you’re losing the war and he’s going to get exactly wants. You squirm and wiggle your hips trying to stop him from sinking in. In his frustration he pulls down the top of your dress and slaps your tit. You feel the sting as your arm goes to his chest but he quickly recaptures your wrist.

“Stop moving” he warns

“Fuck you loser!”

“Gladly”

The most sickening smile splits his face as he sinks himself deep into you. A loud groan is pushed out of you as he shoves your organs out of the way with his fat cock.

“Wanna say that again?” he croons in your ear

You look up at him with doe eyes, not ready for how he is about to tear you apart and shake your head ‘no’

“That’s what I thought.”

He glides into you slow and deep, making sure you feel every vein as he violates you. He loves watching your eyes go wide every time he bottoms out, pausing to feel the full effect of him stuffing you. You whimper and groan stretched more than you thought possible, helplessly trapped. There was no running, no way out. You were alone and defenseless.

Nevertheless you struggle under his weight, trying to free your wrists. Annoyed by your incessant struggle he decides to bring them above your head and pin them together, freeing up his hand so he can grab your nipple, squeezing it between his index finger and thumb. You squirm as he applies pressure.

“Keep resisting and see what happens” Kakashi threatens as he pulls up with your bud trapped in his pinch. You draw breath through your teeth, the pain consuming your thoughts. Not even registering that he hasn’t stopped rutting into you the entire time.

“Gahh!”

“Understand?” You’re so focused on the pain in your nipple that all you do is whimper. “Answer me!” he barks with a twist of your nub

“Nggh! Fine!” Your eyes are screwed shut. You begin to open them when he releases your captive bud but you flinch when he slaps your tit again.

He grabs your face, smushing your cheeks together.

“See, I knew you could follow directions. That’s a smart girl”

You loathed him but you couldn’t help how your walls were restricting around him. His size massaged your sweet slit in such a gratifying way. Your body completely betrayed your mind. It seemed completely out of touch with the gravity of your situation. He left you breathless, your lungs forgetting how to breathe, as he pummeled into you.

Anger on your mind, you watched him as he watched you. You pan over his stinging brown eyes, his angular features, and the mole that sits just below his drool inducing lips. He was hot and you hate him all the more for it.

Disgust written on your mug as he studies you, anxiously waiting to watch you break. He picks up a little speed and you groan into it. You immediately regret the noise when you see a smug simper stretch on his face. You try to give him a glare but he hits you with a particularly sharp thrust and your face betrays you as your mouth falls open and your profile softens from pleasure.

“I knew you were just a weak little slut.”

“Shut up.”

He slaps your face. “Wanna try that again?”

You attempt another glare at him but he thrusts up into you in a way that hits a sweet spot and you mewl for him.

“Ah! Thank you, ah.”

His chuckle makes your stomach twist as you realize what you said.

“Ahh, she has manners.” condescension thick. You truly hate him.

He continues to thrust against the same spot making you pant under him. You cry pleasured screams from the sensation. He kept going, enjoying the view of you coming undone against your will.

The sounds of your submission were getting a touch too loud. Trusting that you would behave, he strips off his shirt to reveal his well defined muscular frame beneath. He balls up the hem and shoves it in your mouth before returning a hand to your wrists, obediently still crossed together, waiting to be restrained again.

You hated how good it felt. The recognition of him pleasuring you made you feel slimy on the inside, and desperate to get him off of you. He was your brother. Your arrogant asshole of a brother, yet he had you panting and crying beneath him. He was such a sick fuck.

He gains speed. Beginning to bang the headboard into the wall. The sound thundering through the quiet night. Good thing the parents weren’t home to hear you cause he was beginning to lose his composure. He had been so careful to conceal his hunger but it was evident in his eyes that he was wild with lust. You sing into your gag, eyes beginning to roll back into your head. His unrelenting pace, his careful aim, and his grunts combined into a euphoric melody that had you spasming around him, calling his name through the gag. Your body stiffened as the orgasm tore through you.

“That’s a good brat. See how good it is to behave?”

You dumbly nod your head as the aftershocks course through your system. He strokes slowly allowing you to fall limp before he barks at you again.

“Get on your knees” he says, lifting his weight off of your wrists. He helps you flip over on your stomach and his hands pull up your hips so they are aligned with his pelvis. You attempt to support your weight on your arms when he pushes your head back down, roughly shoving you into the mattress.

“Brats get fucked like whores. Lift your slut face off the sheets and there will be consequences..”

You cry out as you obey his command. He pushes in just the tip and you anxiously close around it before he pulls out again. You hate the way you whined from how empty you felt. He pushes in just a little deeper before retreating again, toying with you to prove his point. This time when he begins to line up his tip you rock your hips all the way back so he ‘s buried inside of you. You hadn’t anticipated how the angle would overstimulate you and you gasp about to pull away but his hands grab your hips and hold you steady. He begins to chuckle.

“Such a twerp, complaining about something you did to yourself.”

You loathe yourself for how you sought him out just now. He was assaulting you and you were practically begging him to fill you. It was all a game to him and your pathetic response was exhilarating.

He brings his hand down on your backside that was already bruised and purple from his earlier battery. You feel tears prick at the corners of your eyes, cries muffled by his shirt. He strikes you more. Every time you try to tuck your tail under to avoid the abuse he pushes down on your back. You were not running away from him. You were a mouse trapped in the maze.

He begins to ram into you, the plush tissue of your behind rippling violently as his hips collide into you on repeat. Your fingers spread and grip onto your duvet for dear life as he bullies himself deep into you.

You can’t handle the feeling. He’s too big! You lift yourself up trying to change the angle, trying to find relief, when his formidable hands sweep across your neck and choke you. He pulls you up just enough that your arms couldn’t reach the mattress and your entire body weight was supported by his grip on your neck. His hands sink into your trachea with every plummet into your slick cavern.

You claw at his hands on your neck, trying to get under his fingers to lift the pressure from your windpipe so you could breathe. Your attempts were futile. Eventually your hands grip his wrists, giving up on being allowed to breathe.

“I told you not to lift your face. Here I thought you were learning your lesson.”

Seeing the gag start to fall out of your mouth, he lifts one hand off your neck to stuff it deeper before returning it to your throat. You spasm around him, tears spilling from your eyes, back involuntarily bowing, allowing him to push against your diaphragm. He knocked the wind out of you without allowing you to catch your breath. His cruelty leaves you putty in his hands, pliable and bending to his will. Gushing around his girth, broken and winded.

“Now you’re starting to get the picture.”

Pleasured cries permeate through the fabric in your mouth. He doesn’t plan on letting up any time soon either. He’s enjoying the view too much. Your glutes shake with each thrust while they’re spread wide open. He hones in on your puckered rear when he remembers what he found when he was snooping in your room.

He pulls out of you and grabs you around the waist, pulling your back into his cut chest, possessively holding you so you can’t run away as he drags you across the bed where he can reach into your nightstand drawer. He pulls out your tiny black plug with a blue gem on the end. You look over and through your dazed state you realize what he grabbed and you start to protest.

“No, no, no, no” you say through the cloth.

He shoves you down pulling your hips up once more and shoving your face back into the bed so your cries cannot be heard. His spit falls onto your rear, pooling over your sphincter where he pushes down on the tapered tip of your plug. You begin to wail.

“What’s all the fuss for? This is your’s, is it not? I thought whores liked having their holes stuffed.”

You tried pulling away but his grip on your hips tightened and he slammed back into you enjoying the friction of where the plug encroached on the space in your tunnel.

You looked so beautiful with the blue gem protruding out of your dirty hole. He was definitely going to do this to you again. He was going to make you beg him for it once he was done putting you in your place.

The thought of you coming to his room, plug in place, to get another taste of his fat cock made him ravenous. He rails into you using every drop of athleticism he has. You start to scream and go dizzy. His heavy balls slap into the bundle of nerves swelling between your legs. Eventually they swing into you with so much voracity that you twitch with each stroke of his hips. Your face began to melt into the mattress from his pounding and you are certain he will break your neck from the force.

He flips you over, pushing your hips up so your knees are by your face, ass high in the air. He stands on the bed and sinks himself between your lips, thrusting down into you with all his might. Abdominals flexing with each thrust, passionate grunts bending you in half. The impossible positions shredding what was left of your once tight pussy.

“Take it little slut.”

He can see the helpless tears leak from your eyes as you feel every inch of him being swallowed up by your soiled cunt.

“Fuck Kakashi” you moan between labored breaths.

He smirks. He had you just where he wanted you. He only needed to push you over the edge. He reached down and begins whirling circles around your clit. You shriek and knock your knees together. But his silky chuckle cuts your mind like a knife. The fucker was laughing at you. You squirm but your current position was so compromising you couldn’t move. He plays with you rubbing more vigorously. You scream and holler under him unfamiliar with such intensity as this.

“Ple-Pl-ease” you dumbly whine.

“Please what, sis? You’ll need to speak up”

“M-may I c-cu-mm?”

He pounds into you without relenting. “Sorry, I didn’t quite catch that”

He was such an abhorrent ass but the heat in your lower belly was boiling over and you needed to release. You try to phish your voice from the back of your mind but it’s swimming and the way he drags along your ridges while swirling your sensitive bud has you desperate for him.

“Gah! Please l’me cum!”

The glint in his eyes sickened you but you didn’t have the strength to care as he readjusted his stroke to pound into the sweet spot he found earlier. Your entire body convulsed under him as you had the most intense orgasm of your life.

Kakashi, pleased with his successful session of taming you, feels his own gratification on its precipice.

He pulls out of your quaking cunt with a slap to your sensitive clit causing your hips to fall to the mattress with a cry. Your destroyed state was erotic. Helplessly shaking, sweat all over your body, dress bunched around your stomach, hair knotted and messy, ass still plugged and tears drenching your face. His fingers seek out your hair to hold you still while he paints your face white.

“That’s a good girl. Take your reward.”

You tremble in his arms. When his seed can no longer shoot from his tip and simply oozes from his slit Kakashi presses himself against your lips. You part them slightly to give it a kiss leaving him to shutter from sensitivity.

“Yes, very good”

He brushes your cheek with his thumb pad smearing his cum along your skin. You look up at him pathetically and he smiles down on you.

“There we go sweet sister. That’s much better.”

You make a little whine that he finds so precious.

“Go clean yourself up little one.” he pets your head before pulling on his sweatpants and tucking himself away. “I’m going to bed. Feel free to join me if you want.”

He grabs his shirt, throwing it over his shoulder before lacing both hands together behind his head as he walks away.

Your lip quivers as you entertain the idea, realizing you were hopelessly hooked.

Shakily you get up, pulling your dress off the rest of the way and walk naked to the bathroom. Kakashi glances over from his bed as he sees you through the crack in his bedroom door before exhaustion lulls him to sleep.

He wakes up a half hour later to your weak-willed body slipping into his bed completely naked. He opens his arms, letting you settle into his chest before he closes them around you. You exhale with a small sigh and in your mind you know you would be yearning for the next time the two of you are home alone so he could tie you up and brutally defile you again.

He plants a kiss on your forehead, mind flooded with gratification at finally breaking you down into such a needy state.

He reaches down between your cheeks to see you kept your plug in tact. He gives it a small tug and you look up at him with a whine. He nuzzled your nose and whispers to you in his silky smooth voice before gently pressing a kiss on your lips.

“Such a filthy brat”

Masterlist

#kakashi x reader #kakashi smut #kakashi hatake #kakashi senpai #kakashi is daddy #kakashi fanfiction #hatake kakashi #hatake smut #kakashi romance #dark kakashi #kakashi x you #reader x kakashi #mean kakashi #anon ask #kakashi modern au #noncon smut #dark smut

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dilly-oh · 3 months

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Lost and Found Family

“Come on, Pakkun, just shit already,” Kakashi sighs, tugging impatiently at his dog’s leash. The ornery pug gives him an annoyed glance, then keeps sniffing the same bush he’s been investigating for the past fifteen minutes. “Oh my GOD. I should have left you at the pound.”

Pakkun continues to ignore him, instead deciding that the bush doesn’t meet his standards and moving on to sniff at another, nearly identical bush. Kakashi wants to scream.

He’s still in his ratty pajamas, for God’s sake, with a vicious case of bed-head, not to mention it’s past noon, and passersby are giving him strange looks. One even tries to hand him a dollar, but Kakashi shoos them away irritably.

“Okay, enough. Here.” He rifles around in his pants pocket. “Do your business, and you get a treat, okay?” He pulls out a doggie bone and waves it enticingly. “Who’s a good boy? Who’s a good boy?” Pakkun just gives him a flat stare. “…Yeah I know it’s not you but take it anyway.” He throws it on the ground. The pug doesn’t even twitch. “Oh, come on. It’s not that stale.” Pakkun snorts. “Whatever. I’m sure some wild animal will come along and eat-”

And then a kid scurries over, picks up the treat, and starts gnawing on it.

“Um,” Kakashi says.

The kid looks up at him with wide, shockingly blue eyes, his hair a tangled blonde mess. He looks like a scruffy dandelion, complete with grass-stained elbows and knees. Kakashi blinks.

“…What’re you doing?”

“Looking for my dad,” the kid answers around a mouthful of stale dog treat. “You seen him, gramps?” Kakashi nearly chokes.

“Gramps?!”

“I’ll take that as a no.” The kid swallows and grimaces. “Ugh, this cookie tastes like ass. Also, I might be lost.”

Kakashi starts looking around for a policeman.

The kid suddenly scrambles up a nearby tree like a rabid squirrel and teeters out on an upper branch, shading his eyes with one hand as he searches the horizon.

“Christ, kid, you should be on a leash,” Kakashi says. The boy looks down at him.

“I was, I chewed through it.”

Kakashi starts looking for that cop again.

“Oh my God, chill. I’m joking. I did lose my dad, though.” The kid squints in frustration, still searching. “Damn, I still don’t see him. Where did he GO?” He glances down at Kakashi. “I’d ask you to look, but I don’t trust your eyesight, old man.”

“I am THIRTY-”

“So you’ll help me?”

“I did NOT agree- look, just get down from there before you- AWK!” Kakashi cuts off in a squawk as the kid pounces on him, nearly tackling him to the ground. “Good lord, you almost threw out my back-”

“Okay, boomer,” the kid says. Kakashi nearly walks away.

“Do NOT make me regret this.” He threatens, glaring at him. “On second thought, I already do, but nevermind that. What does your dad call you?”

“Well, let’s see.” The kid thinks for a minute. “There’s ‘buster’, ‘lazy-butt’, ‘Mr. Stinky McPoo-Pants-”

“I mean your name!”

“Oh. It’s Naruto.”

“…He named you after RAMEN?” Kakashi is completely appalled. He’s considering contacting child protective services.

“Yeah, but it’s cool, I love ramen.” Naruto catches sight of Pakkun and gasps with delight. “And doggies. Hey, buddy!” He actually gets down on hands and knees to greet the pug face-to-face. Pakkun is rather cordial and simply grunts in annoyance at the intrusion of his personal space.

“Why don’t you sniff his butt while you’re down there,” Kakashi grumbles.

“Are you gonna help me find my dad or what?” Naruto asks, getting back to his feet.

“That depends.” Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “…He cute?”

“Okay, ew, nevermind-”

“I was joking, kid, get back here.” Kakashi sighs in defeat and pulls out his phone. “What’s his number?”

“I dunno.”

“How can you not- have you never called him before?”

“Course I have. Usually like this.” The kid takes a deep breath. “DAAAAAAAAAAD-”

“OKAY STOP. I meant with a phone.” Naruto just gives him a blank look. “…You don’t have a phone? How about a pager? Tracking chip? Anything??” Still the blank stare. Kakashi tries a different approach. “What’s your dad look like?” The kid shrugs.

“Like a dad.”

“No, that’s not- describe him.”

“Well, he’s pretty bossy. He’s always telling me to clean my room and eat my vegetables when I’d rather just eat ramen, and he doesn’t let me play Fortnite-”

“That is not what-” Kakashi has to count to ten. “What color is his hair?”

“Oh.” Naruto blinks. “Boring.”

“Boring is not a color. How about his height and weight?”

“I dunno. Boring, again.”

“And his face? For the love of God do not say boring-”

“It’s normal. Average. Standard.”

“…That’s my bad, I walked right into that one,” Kakashi says, deadpan. “Okay, so we’re looking for any adult man within a radius of five miles. He got a name?”

“Bofa,” Naruto answers.

“…Bofa?”

“Bofa DEEZ NUTS-”

Kakashi starts to walk away.

“No wait please I’m sorry-”

Against his better judgement, Kakashi stops and slowly turns around. “This is your last chance before I take you to the pound,” he warns. Pakkun barks, offended. “You too, pal.” He looks at Naruto. “Where’s the last place you saw him?”

“Umm…this way!” Naruto grabs him by the arm and drags him along. Kakashi makes a mental note to Purell vigorously once this is over, as he is unable to distinguish whether the brown smears on the kid’s hands are dirt, chocolate, or something much more foul. Pakkun grumbles at the fast pace but is able to keep up. Kakashi’s glad he’s at least getting some exercise.

What follows next is a mad scramble through the streets, as Naruto is easily distracted by every sight, sound, and smell. Kakashi has to pull him out of a fountain twice, break up a fight between him and an unruly pigeon, and is forced to buy him a hotdog from a vendor after he complains of missing lunch. Then he demands Kakashi carry him on his shoulders for ‘optimal dad-spotting’, as he puts it. Kakashi almost agrees, then notices Naruto’s funny little dance and hustles him behind a tree before he has an accident.

All in all, it’s a very hectic hour. Kakashi is considering taking the harness off of Pakkun and putting it on the kid. Which is obviously what Naruto’s dad should have done, seeing as he is partly to blame for this whole mess. What kind of selfish, irresponsible parent loses their kid like this-

“Naruto?” a voice says behind them.

“DAD!!” Naruto shoots from Kakashi’s side, squealing in delight.

Kakashi opens his mouth and turns around, intent on giving the man a piece of his mind.

His jaw falls open the rest of the way and swings in the breeze.

Naruto’s a fucking LIAR. His dad is most definitely not boring.

He’s a complete babe.

His boring brown hair is a lovely, chocolatey brown that drapes over his shoulders, clinging enticingly to his jawline. His boring eyes are a deeper, richer shade of brown, framed by long, dark lashes. His boring body is a gorgeously toned physique, highlighted by a pair of tight jogging pants and thin t-shirt.

And his face, dear God, his face.

If Naruto is a dandelion, he’s the blazing sun. The warm smile on his face as he hugs his kid warms Kakashi from ten feet away. He wants to bask in it for hours, but the warmth quickly diminishes as Naruto’s dad grows serious.

“Where did you GO?” he demands, holding Naruto at arm’s length. A scar across his nose wrinkles with concern, which is fucking adorable. “I look away for one second and you’re gone! What happened?”

“There was an ice cream truck,” Naruto says weakly. Iruka just stares at him.

“…Did you at least catch it?”

“No.”

“Good, because you definitely don’t deserve ice-cream after running off like that.” He finally looks up and notices Kakashi. “Oh, hello.”

Kakashi shuts his jaw with an audible snap. “Hi.” It comes out more of a squeak than a sexy, manly purr, and he quickly clears his throat. “I’m Kakashi. Nice to meet you. Uhh…”

“Iruka,” the man helpfully supplies, holding out a strong, fine-boned hand. Kakashi has to suppress the urge to go down on one knee and kiss it. With tongue. “Thank you so much for bringing my son back to me.” His grin grows slightly wicked. “Although I’m not too sure I should be thanking you.”

“Not funny, dad,” Naruto huffs at him. “It was an accident, I swear. I won’t leave aga- oh my gosh is that a quarter over there-”

“NOPE.” Iruka grabs him by the scruff of the neck like a mama cat and reels him back in. “We are going straight home, buster, and you are getting locked in the basement- I mean your room.”

Kakashi chokes on a laugh, faltering a little. He’s desperate to say something else to keep this lovely man’s attention, anything-

“I hope his mother wasn’t too worried,” he blurts out, then immediately wants to sock himself in the face. Way to kill the mood, asshole.

“Oh, hell no, I’m gay as fuck,” Iruka states bluntly. “He’s adopted.”

“…I see,” Kakashi says calmly, while hearing an angel choir singing a chorus of ‘Hallelujah’ in the background.

“I have a wine aunt,” Naruto says.

“Naruto, do NOT call Anko that-”

“But she is!”

“Let me finish. To her FACE.”

Kakashi’s grinning like a fool, watching the banter between the two. It’s incredibly entertaining. They should have their own sitcom.

“And what happened to your clothes?” Iruka goes on in exasperation. “Did you roll around in the dog park or did you let a dog poop directly on you?”

“Hey, at least I’m not still in my pajamas!” Naruto gestures at Kakashi, who freezes.

Fuck. He’d forgotten about that. Immediately he’s self-conscious, painfully aware of his worn pajamas and messy hair. And here’s Iruka looking like a whole ass snack. FUCK.

“Uh, yeah, sorry, rough morning,” he says, chuckling awkwardly.

“Don’t worry about it, I’ve been there,” Iruka replies with ease. “One time I went to the store with puke on my shirt. Didn’t even care. I totally understand.”

Kakashi doesn’t think he could possibly be more attracted to the man.

“Oh my God, I love your pug,” Iruka says, and Goddamn if Kakashi doesn’t fall in love right then and there. “We should totally walk our dogs together.”

“You guys have a dog?” Kakashi asks in surprise. “Isn’t the kid enough?” Iruka laughs.

“His name is Kurama!” Naruto chimes in. “He’s a Shiba Inu.” He goes on in a whisper. “He’s such an asshole.”

“Naruto, language,” Iruka hisses.

“Pakkun is, too,” Kakashi says, nodding at the pug, who gives a surly growl at the sound of his name. “Oh, shut up. You know I love you.” Iruka laughs again.

“Well then, it’s a date,” he says with a wink, and Kakashi nearly cheers aloud. “It’ll be fun. Naruto can come with us.”

And just like that, the flirty atmosphere comes to a screeching halt.

Kakashi opens his mouth to object, and then stops. Because of course Naruto will come with them. He’s Iruka’s kid. It’s a package deal. If he’s truly interested in the man, he has to be willing to accept that.

Kakashi doesn’t know if he can.

He has almost no experience with children, seeing them as little more than puppies who can talk. They poop and pee everywhere, trash the place, eat all your food, and generally make a racket. They’re not even that cute-

“Thanks for helping me!” Naruto says, beaming up at him like a miniature sun, then throws his arms around his waist in a tight hug.

Kakashi is rendered speechless. He can’t remember the last time he’s been hugged. It’s…nice. He looks over at Iruka in bewilderment, and is stunned at the look of pure love on Iruka’s face, transforming it into something even more beautiful than before.

…Maybe this won’t be so bad.

“Later, gramps!”

And then Naruto whips around and runs back to his dad, elbowing Kakashi right in the dick.

…Still worth it.

-End-

(Written for @kakairu-rocks KakaIru Valentine's Week 2024, Day 1 prompts: Meet Cute and Found Family.)

#kakairu #umino iruka #hatake kakashi #naruto #fanfic #meet cute #found family #kakairu valentine's week 2024 #kakairu.rocks #modern au

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