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#just two evil men
sgcairo · 2 years
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There’s no canon dottolone content can I bear you with the responsibility of writing their law?
I think I'm underqualified for this, but I will take this responsibility-
The sad truth of the matter is that there will likely be very little canon content, seeing the path Genshin is on. I could write a whole essay on why it's highly improbable that we'll ever get the content we desire, but I'll try my hand at writing the law.
From here's three fundamental laws to writing these two:
1. They hate each other's guts. If Dottore had to choose between scooping out his own organs with a spoon and being stuck in a room with Pantalone for more than five minutes, the spoon is about to get some serious use. They would rather bite out each other's tongues than mash face, the thought alone is mortifying.
2. Banter. They annoy the living shit out of each other, and it can be equated to two kindergartners fighting over one of them calling the other names. They have to literally be pulled apart before one of them ends up strangling the other in meetings. It might be a clone, but Dottore is still Dottore, and Pantalone has a vague murderous urge whenever he's in the vicinity.
3. They're absolutely obsessed with each other. Not necessarily in the romantic or even friendly way, in the I want you to choke and die and think about it every day way. It develops in other ways in the future, but these two hate each other's guts, and will go to a near extreme degree to irritate each other. They will not stop ranting about how much the other annoys them, and the other Harbingers are convinced that they're married at this point.
This might be a toxic relationship, but it's a sick bastard falling for another sick bastard. There are no expectations here.
As for other mini-laws I've given myself:
-Pantalone is absolutely crazy for Dottore's eyes. They might be red and considered absolutely terrifying for those that behold them, but Pantalone loses his mind over them. So cruel, but so beautiful. He kisses Dottore's eyelids even, to show how much he adores them.
-Dottore claims hates Pantalone's voice, but actually somewhat likes it. Sure, it sounds pretentious as hell, but when Pantalone gets into his droning, it's actually somewhat pleasant. Though he'll never admit that, he's too proud.
-Any physical encounters between these two always end with their faces inches away from mashing. I don't make the rules. Makes the tension go 📈📈📈📈📈.
-Pantalone has to either criticize or attempt to fix Dottore's horrendous fashion. He can't be seen with such an unruly mess of straps and buckles, now can he? So they must go-
-Violence is always the answer with these two. That's the only thing they'll ever agree on.
Honestly, these two are menaces to society and mashing them together is the worst possible thing you can do. And that's why I do it. Thank you for coming to my TED talk.
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cuddlytogas · 2 months
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So I accidentally almost got into an argument on Twitter, and now I'm thinking about bad historical costuming tropes. Specifically, Action Hero Leather Pants.
See, I was light-heartedly pointing out the inaccuracies of the costumes in Black Sails, and someone came out of the woodwork to defend the show. The misunderstanding was that they thought I was dismissing the show just for its costumes, which I wasn't - I was simply pointing out that it can't entirely care about material history (meaning specifically physical objects/culture) if it treats its clothes like that.
But this person was slightly offended on behalf of their show - especially, quote, "And from a fan of OFMD, no less!" Which got me thinking - it's true! I can abide a lot more historical costuming inaccuracy from Our Flag than I can Black Sails or Vikings. And I don't think it's just because one has my blorbos in it. But really, when it comes down to it...
What is the difference between this and this?
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Here's the thing. Leather pants in period dramas isn't new. You've got your Vikings, Tudors, Outlander, Pirates of the Caribbean, Once Upon a Time, Will, The Musketeers, even Shakespeare in Love - they love to shove people in leather and call it a day. But where does this come from?
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Obviously we have the modern connotations. Modern leather clothes developed in a few subcultures: cowboys drew on Native American clothing. (Allegedly. This is a little beyond my purview, I haven't seen any solid evidence, and it sounds like the kind of fact that people repeat a lot but is based on an assumption. I wouldn't know, though.) Leather was used in some WWI and II uniforms.
But the big boom came in the mid-C20th in motorcycle, punk/goth, and gay subcultures, all intertwined with each other and the above. Motorcyclists wear leather as practical protective gear, and it gets picked up by rock and punk artists as a symbol of counterculture, and transferred to movie designs. It gets wrapped up in gay and kink communities, with even more countercultural and taboo meanings. By the late C20th, leather has entered mainstream fashion, but it still carries those references to goths, punks, BDSM, and motorbike gangs, to James Dean, Marlon Brando, and Mick Jagger. This is whence we get our Spikes and Dave Listers in 1980s/90s media, bad boys and working-class punks.
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And some of the above "historical" design choices clearly build on these meanings. William Shakespeare is dressed in a black leather doublet to evoke the swaggering bad boy artist heartthrob, probably down on his luck. So is Kit Marlowe.
But the associations get a little fuzzier after that. Hook, with his eyeliner and jewellery, sure. King Henry, yeah, I see it. It's hideously ahistorical, but sure. But what about Jamie and Will and Ragnar, in their browns and shabby, battle-ready chic? Well, here we get the other strain of Bad Period Drama Leather.
See, designers like to point to history, but it's just not true. Leather armour, especially in the western/European world, is very, very rare, and not just because it decays faster than metal. (Yes, even in ancient Greece/Rome, despite many articles claiming that as the start of the leather armour trend!) It simply wasn't used a lot, because it's frankly useless at defending the body compared to metal. Leather was used as a backing for some splint armour pieces, and for belts, sheathes, and buckles, but it simply wasn't worn like the costumes above. It's heavy, uncomfortable, and hard to repair - it's simply not practical for a garment when you have perfectly comfortable, insulating, and widely available linen, wool, and cotton!
As far as I can see, the real influence on leather in period dramas is fantasy. Fantasy media has proliferated the idea of leather armour as the lightweight choice for rangers, elves, and rogues, a natural, quiet, flexible material, less flashy or restrictive than metal. And it is cheaper for a costume department to make, and easier for an actor to wear on set. It's in Dungeons and Dragons and Lord of the Rings, King Arthur, Runescape, and World of Warcraft.
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And I think this is how we get to characters like Ragnar and Vane. This idea of leather as practical gear and light armour, it's fantasy, but it has this lineage, behind which sits cowboy chaps and bomber/flight jackets. It's usually brown compared to the punk bad boy's black, less shiny, and more often piecemeal or decorated. In fact, there's a great distinction between the two Period Leather Modes within the same piece of media: Robin Hood (2006)! Compare the brooding, fascist-coded villain Guy of Gisborne with the shabby, bow-wielding, forest-dwelling Robin:
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So, back to the original question: What's the difference between Charles Vane in Black Sails, and Edward Teach in Our Flag Means Death?
Simply put, it's intention. There is nothing intentional about Vane's leather in Black Sails. It's not the only leather in the show, and it only says what all shabby period leather says, relying on the same tropes as fantasy armour: he's a bad boy and a fighter in workaday leather, poor, flexible, and practical. None of these connotations are based in reality or history, and they've been done countless times before. It's boring design, neither historically accurate nor particularly creative, but much the same as all the other shabby chic fighters on our screens. He has a broad lineage in Lord of the Rings and Pirates of the Caribbean and such, but that's it.
In Our Flag, however, the lineage is much, much more intentional. Ed is a direct homage to Mad Max, the costuming in which is both practical (Max is an ex-cop and road warrior), and draws on punk and kink designs to evoke a counterculture gone mad to the point of social breakdown, exploiting the thrill of the taboo to frighten and titillate the audience.
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In particular, Ed is styled after Max in the second movie, having lost his family, been badly injured, and watched the world turn into an apocalypse. He's a broken man, withdrawn, violent, and deliberately cutting himself off from others to avoid getting hurt again. The plot of Mad Max 2 is him learning to open up and help others, making himself vulnerable to more loss, but more human in the process.
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This ties directly into the themes of Our Flag - it's a deliberate intertext. Ed's emotional journey is also one from isolation and pain to vulnerability, community, and love. Mad Max (intentionally and unintentionally) explores themes of masculinity, violence, and power, while Max has become simplified in the popular imagination as a stoic, badass action hero rather than the more complex character he is, struggling with loss and humanity. Similarly, Our Flag explores masculinity, both textually (Stede is trying to build a less abusive pirate culture) and metatextually (the show champions complex, banal, and tender masculinities, especially when we're used to only seeing pirates in either gritty action movies or childish comedies).
Our Flag also draws on the specific countercultures of motorcycles, rockers, and gay/BDSM culture in its design and themes. Naturally, in such a queer show, one can't help but make the connection between leather pirates and leather daddies, and the design certainly nods at this, with its vests and studs. I always think about this guy, with his flat cap so reminiscient of gay leather fashions.
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More overtly, though, Blackbeard and his crew are styled as both violent gangsters and countercultural rockstars. They rove the seas like a bikie gang, free and violent, and are seen as icons, bad boys and celebrities. Other pirates revere Blackbeard and wish they could be on his crew, while civilians are awed by his reputation, desperate for juicy, gory details.
This isn't all of why I like the costuming in Our Flag Means Death (especially season 1). Stede's outfits are by no means accurate, but they're a lot more accurate than most pirate media, and they're bright and colourful, with accurate and delightful silks, lace, velvets, and brocades, and lovely, puffy skirts on his jackets. Many of the Revenge crew wear recognisable sailor's trousers, and practical but bright, varied gear that easily conveys personality and flair. There is a surprising dedication to little details, like changing Ed's trousers to fall-fronts for a historical feel, Izzy's puffy sleeves, the handmade fringe on Lucius's red jacket, or the increasing absurdity of navy uniform cuffs between Nigel and Chauncey.
A really big one is the fact that they don't shy away from historical footwear! In almost every example above, we see the period drama's obsession with putting men in skinny jeans and bucket-top boots, but not only does Stede wear his little red-heeled shoes with stockings, but most of his crew, and the ordinary people of Barbados, wear low boots or pumps, and even rough, masculine characters like Pete wear knee breeches and bright colours. It's inaccurate, but at least it's a new kind of inaccuracy, that builds much more on actual historical fashions, and eschews the shortcuts of other, grittier period dramas in favour of colour and personality.
But also. At least it fucking says something with its leather.
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Iran is bombing Israel apparently, FAFO moment truly.
Both Biden and Trump are vowing to defend Israel with harsh military force against Iran.
If they follow through with it and the US moves against Iran, this will actually become a war.
Do not stop pressuring politicians to support Palestine. Do not stop advocating for Palestine. Do not stop protesting Israel. Do not stop protesting genocide.
From the river to the sea.
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skitskatdacat63 · 5 months
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Pictures that fuel the 007 vettonso au that exists in my head(for now)
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Also go listen to "You Know My Name", and think of Vettonso while doing so because I think it is SOOOOOO them coded(but also f1 in general tbh.) And also if you've seen Casino Royale, hey, remember that chair scene? >:)
#anwyays some thoughts on the au:#thinking that seb is Bond of course and Nando is a former 00 agent whos gone rogue 🤭#(<- so basically like Raoul Silva lol)#(also my god basically im weirdly obsessed w the daniel craig bond movies(mostly casino royale) +#(+ bcs my brother and i watched all of them in two days last Christmas so theyre just forever embedded in my consciousness ig)#(SO PLEASE BEAR WITH ME YKNOW)#tbf the only reason this au is just in my head is bcs it would require me to draw them more masc handsme#bcs bond is not a twink(😔) and im not good at drawing men like that so UGH#mayne one day itll make its way into art. would you guys be satisifed w chibis? 🥺#i wanna recreate one of those iconic movie poster poses or smth but yeah not my forte ig#but if i was drawinf LESBIAN james bond id be on it instantly(one day. one day...)#<- speaking of that. fucking hilarious how i can only draw fem men and masc women. duality!!!#but gaahhhh yeah this au is sponsored by eternal casino royale brainrot#just imagining vettonso playing cat and mouse is so !!!!!#also side note. all these pics are from various fia galas. waahhhh wouldnt that be an interesting setting for a bond film#i bet bond would like f1 🤭🤭 fast cars!!#also bond au btw literally originally just comes from the fact that they both race for Aston...its just so fitting#the fact that seb actually named his amr21 after a bond girl!!#well dw bcs Fernando in this can be both his bond villain and his bond girl. dualityq#fernando is an mi6 agent(0014) who seb looks up to but he defects and turns evil bcs seb gets promoted above him#as grace said when i told her this: seb would be a great Bond with his cockiness and jokes and confidence etc etc#sebastian vettel#fernando alonso#vettonso#catie.rambling.txt
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scalpelsister · 8 months
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also this isnt really proper shade at larian or anything and the writing of this game is SAURE good so dont take it this way but.
i sure do wish. Minthara was not villain batted as hard as she was. Her being locked to "evil" runs and being mutually exclusive with several party members. Her being nothing more than a miniboss for your average player- who does not even know shes a potential party member! Her being so chronically unloved by the community because... shes the "evil" companion. Hell, even the amount of people saying frankly really edgy shit about killing her or hurting her completely unprompted lmao. Like I genuinely think shes been pretty unfairly demonized both by the community and by the meta of just like... the game itself because she's really actually..... kind of, dare I say, sweet? if you get to know her. ugh.
#also if i had two nickles. shes sylvanas all over again lads i fear#idk obviously larian handles her character much better than wow ever handled sylvanas but its genuinely like#kind of eerie how similar they are and how hard they where both villain batted considering how evil they actually are#ESP compared to their male counterparts#like i would argue that neither of them are any more evil- and likely are even less evil- than a lot of the men in the same game that#are not villain batted at all.#like every character in warcraft is a war criminal so sylvanas is hardly uniquely evil on that front#and i have a hard time buying that minthara is anymore inherently evil than astarion lol#idk again larian handles trauma much better and it feels... inauthentic to accuse them of not treating minthara well because shes#traumatized. thats def not the argument im making here but it IS really sad to relate to / find catharsis in another traumatized elf#only for her to be. villain batted just like the last one :/#idk. its just a bummer.#like again thankfully its not a thesis of larians like. karlach and shadowheart and laezel are all beautiful and wonderful examples of like#traumatized women allowed to be angry and validated for being angry#BUT im selfish haha i want my bestie minthara to be able to have a happy ending w the rest of us and i dont want to see her demonized for#idk being a traumatized angry woman like!! it seems outta place for that to be the message but#whatever im rambling ive lost the plot#my post
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quietwingsinthesky · 6 months
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i love that one of the things amara says about chuck is that he “always had terrible taste in men.” amara what does that mean. men didn’t exist yet. what are you talking about. were you peeking outside of your prison just to see how shit your brother was at picking up guys.
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ssaalexblake · 9 months
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Look okay not to be that person but everybody blaming Chapel for Spock acting weird like she wasn't doing her best to return him to normal to not fuck up his Vulcan ritual with his fiance despite him being far more open to her than ever before, meaning she's literally doing this dangerous stuff to cure him despite how she'd personally benefit if she didn't because it's a) her job b) she feels responsible this happened because He chose to save her and c) she cares about him on top of both of those things and doesn't want him to not be himself, only for him to go to her Anyway at the end of it all. Him go to her. Not the other way around.
He made Himself weird, he doesn't lack agency, this is not her breaking him or whatever the hell you want to call it.
He went to her.
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kazz-brekker · 2 years
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i think i will be okay with the change to luke’s death if aemond full on bursts into tears over it at some point in season 2. now that they’ve gone the “it was an accident” route i need them to wring every drop of drama and despair out of this that’s possible while also giving him an all-time villain spiral. when you spent years training to be the best possible warrior riding the most feared dragon in the world and the first blood on your hands was a total accident, leads to the downfall of your family, and you’ve committed a sin so terrible you’re permanently damned in the eyes of gods and men alike, what else can you do but hate yourself and where else can you go but further down?
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dykefaggotry · 4 months
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a lesbian, existing, even if they are trans: 🧍‍♂️
ppl in our inboxes: why the fuck are you a man hating t//erf? :)
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nari-nterest · 1 year
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sometimes i remember how toxic jwds could be to each other .....
them being so whipped and devoted in the second half of beyond evil really makes you forget.....
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chilapis · 17 days
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i think we need more s/is that have messy boss battles with blood & fire that would — if a real part of the game — make the players of the game go What the FUCK is that. we NEED more eldritch abominations & affronts to all that is pure and natural. i love how popular the idea of villain f/os with soft spots is within this community, i really do, but maybe I want to be evil incarnate who happens to be betrothed to Some Fucking Guy. maybe i want the world at my feet, like 50 properties to my name, & some mentally ill white man’s hand in marriage. Have you thought about that. Have you considered that. Yes, this is about Genshin Lapis being a 15ft fire breathing serpentine dragon that has canonically killed millions and will do so again. We march at dawn
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landfilloftrash · 7 months
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If I told you there was a series of games created before I was born, developed by Capcom, and that I was obsessed with a pairing of middle aged men within; The pairing being comprised of a someone around a decade or so older than the younger, lighter colored hair, stern and serious with a very deadpan sense of humor, along with “this is my job. I shall do it perfectly” demeanor about his work— very cat-coded in general, if you can think it, it will most probably apply— and the younger being very a determined brunette with firm morals who goes toe to toe with the older man and is frequently one of the only ones who can do so with their hell-bent insistence to do good and defend those who cannot, no matter the cost, who is quite dog-coded in reverse. They spend a few years in each other’s company, learning about each other (even if it’s at a distance and professionally) and then. Something happens. The older one of the pair betrays the brunette — his strings being pulled by a higher power, but it does not excuse him— and in the process reveals a cowardly and vengeful side after the event, causing the entirety of the franchise we play to happen. And then only a bit later in the storyline, one murdered the other, in cold but passioned blood, because destiny deemed it this way and they only heed the call of it. And whether or not it was intentional, leaving said murdered man’s child an orphan completely alone in the world as a side effect. For years after the event, they are satisfied with what happened, if burdened by guilt. But they were right to do so, weren’t they? They proceed to be metaphorically haunted by the man they killed for the rest of their life, however. And that will come to a head for them.
Now… am I talking about Chrisker (Chris Redfield/Albert Wesker), or Shingou (Mitsurugi Shin/Karuma Gou) ?
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elvenchain · 1 year
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Thinking abt post-BW2 Ghetsis again...the conclusion to his story is so unique to me because he isn't banished or killed, nor does he find any kind of redemption. He just disappears completely having lost everything and the one person he could have ever cared about. I wonder how he feels about Colress, and how Colress feels about him too.
I find them both such interesting characters because they don't seem like the sort of people who would ever care about finding love or making friends for the sake of it. They refer to their relationship as an agreement several times in the manga and in the games - implying that if either of them were to find their goals diverging they'd just split off. But that isn't what happens at all. Colress loses to the protagonist and allows them to confront Ghetsis. And when they arrive, he's outraged. And throughout both BW and BW2 Ghetsis refers to his goals as strictly his, usually putting emphasis on it to show how selfish his ambitions are. But in that confrontation he says "our ultimate mission." Ghetsis is a selfish man, but the fact he wanted to share his ultimate goal with Colress shows just how close they were.
Colress definitely doesn't hate him, either. He says it, but the way he talks about Ghetsis in USUM shows pretty clearly that he still cares about him, even when faced with the worst possible version of his friend. But Colress hasn't spoken to his Ghetsis since his defeat.
Will he remain a husk of his former self forever? What happened to his Pokémon? Will Colress ever speak to him again, or will they always have this rift between them? There's something so tragic about both of them - they're terrible people who have done terrible things, but they were happy together at one point. While they were pursuing their goals, they were happy, and they understood each other in a way that went far, far beyond just an alliance out of convenience. They had something, but neither of them realised just what it was until it was too late.
But if Colress ever found him and spoke to him, or he ever went back out into the world, I wonder what kind of life he'd lead, and what sort of man he'd be.
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chushanye · 7 months
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it's always funny to me when I see those straight guy anime posts about how "unlike other anime protags Luffy has never simped 💪" and they're treating it like this big macho thing like he's been able to RESIST attraction 'cause hes just so focused on the grind. like by brother im christ he's just aroace... like thats just a guy.
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cafffine · 3 months
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Margoth, the crossdressing, gender bending ‘transvestite’ royal spy of King Henry III and Prince Edward - Later King Edward I - who helped to turn the tides in the Second Baron’s War of 1264-1267
Sources: The Plantagenets (2012), Dan Jones / Memories of Kennilworth (1867), Edward Waldorf / The Chronicles of Walter of Guisborough (1272-1312) (crudely translated by me)
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phantombohemian · 2 years
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“This isn't goodbye, this is simply see you later.”
The Devil Judge—Beyond Evil Parallel
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