Tumgik
#just needed go get it off my chest i guess
sunkissed-zegras · 1 day
Note
thigh riding with Paige... 🤭
𝐓𝐖𝐎 𝐒𝐄𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐃𝐒 ─ PB⁵
Tumblr media
౨ৎ ─ summary | paige is ignoring you while she locks in while playing fortnite with kk, but you needed her attention (and she hates it when you're needy)
─ word count | 1.1k (this was supposed to be a blurb bruh)
─ warnings | NSFW under the cut, read at your own discretion! kinda mean paige, thigh riding (who woulda guessed?), nothing else?
─ taglist | @xocherishxo @iienstein @yazmunson @euphternal @hello-nah817 @wanderlusturous @plushkhiii @ilovepaigebueckerss @ajcuteee @vi0lentb3rry @paigeszn @brynsreads @delicateray
Tumblr media
"PAIGE," YOU WHINED as she ignored you, her eyes plastered on her computer screen. You rolled your eyes as you sighed, collapsing back on the bed as your girlfriend continued playing Fortnite.
Her headset was on and her glasses were set on the bridge of her nose, her fingers clicking on the keyboard as she played. You were needy and dramatic, sure but it was for good reason, you hadn't seen Paige since the morning and you missed her. Yet right now, it seemed like playing her stupid game meant more to her than her girlfriend.
You wanted her attention but you didn't know how you were gonna get it. As you lay there, feeling neglected, you weighed your options. Interrupting her game would not go over well, but letting your feelings just sit there wouldn't help either.
"Dude they're following us, for sure." Paige mumbled into the headset as she groaned out loud. "I fucking told you, didn't I? I told you to leave it-"
Sighing once more, you sat up and watched her for a moment. The concentration etched on her face was almost endearing, but it also made you feel a bit left out. You wondered if she even realized how much time had passed since she last acknowledged your presence in the room.
An idea popped in your head as a smirk began forming on your lips. You walked up to her quietly, and put a hand on her shoulder as she looked up to see you. "Not right now, baby. Hold on,"
Hold on? Your jaw slightly dropped as you glared at your girlfriend. You couldn't believe Paige ─ her hot and very needy girlfriend was standing right next to her and she wanted her to hold on?
Gathering your courage, you spoke up again, your voice tinged with a hint of irritation. "Paige, seriously," you said, your tone firm. "I've been waiting for you all day, and all I want is a little bit of your time. Is it really too much to ask for?"
"KK, look out behind you!" Paige shouted into the headset, making you audibly groan before Paige finally glanced up at you again, putting a hand over her mic. "What? Why are you giving me attitude for, can't you wait for like, 5 minutes?"
You knew you were being overly dramatic and you knew that Paige hated when you'd give her attitude, especially for something small like this. But you finally had her attention and you were not gonna let it go now.
You met her gaze with a raised eyebrow, your tone dripping with sarcasm. "Oh, sorry to inconvenience you with my presence," you quipped, your voice laced with irritation. "I guess I'll just go find someone who actually wants to spend time with me."
Paige's eyes narrowed at your remark, a hint of annoyance flashing across her face. "Really? You're seriously going to pull that card over a stupid game?"
You shrugged nonchalantly, crossing your arms over your chest. "Why not?" you replied, a smug smirk playing on your lips. "It's not like you've paid any attention to me since you started playing anyway."
She sighed as she heard KK talk, "Yeah, I'm still here. Give me two seconds," she spoke as before she muted herself.
Two seconds, you gotta be kidding me. But before you could scoff or roll your eyes dramatically, Paige grabbed your arm and pulled you into her lap roughly. You stumbled as Paige pulled you into her lap, caught off guard by her sudden movement.
"Hey, what are you doing?" you protested, your voice tinged with annoyance as you struggled to regain your balance.
Paige ignored your protest, her grip firm as she held you close to her. "Fucking relax," she mumbled. "You're acting like a bitch in heat right now, you know that, right?"
You rolled your eyes but you couldn't help but feel yourself begin to get warm. Paige kept her gaze on you and as she pulled you off her lap for a second and gestured to your shorts before she unmuted herself. You stood there, almost shocked for a good two seconds before Paige sent you a look before you did as she told you.
You couldn't believe it took Paige a minute to win you back but you weren't complaining, you needed her. She stuck out her knee and you knew what to do ─ you straddled it as Paige kept her eyes locked on the screen.
"Yeah, you got 'em?" Paige spoke lowly as she felt your dampness hit her bare thigh, feeling a shiver go down her spine. Her cold knee sent a shiver down your spine as you bit your bottom lip.
You let a small whimper before Paige began rocking her knee, causing a full-blown moan to escape your lips. Paige sent you a warning glare as your eyes widen, your hand clasping over your hands.
"What was what noise?" Paige scoffed as she kept her gaze on the screen. "I didn't hear anything," she forced out a laugh as she kept rocking her knee, your cunt gliding against it.
You began to move alongside her knee, your head falling back as you gripped her shoulders. You felt pathetic, riding her thigh like a bitch in heat (in Paige's words) but it felt too good to stop. Your hips movements began more sporadic as Paige continued rocking her knee, muffled whimpers coming out of your lips.
Paige could tell that you were close so she put one of her hands on your hips, guiding you harder on her knee. Your eyes rolled on the back of your head as you let out a moan, feeling the knot in your stomach snap as you came undone on her thigh.
Your body felt like jelly as you collapsed on her chest, her hand moving up to the keyboard as she kept playing. A few minutes pass and you heard KK scream from her headset, glancing at the screen. She got it, she and KK had won the Victory Royale.
As the adrenaline from the game subsided, you nestled into Paige's chest, feeling a sense of contentment wash over you. Despite the earlier tension, being close to Paige like this was all you really wanted.
"Yup, I gotta go, KK. Bro, I'll- yeah, yeah. I got it, I heard you the first time. Okay, I'll see you tomorrow morning." She hung up the call quickly as she pulled off her headset, her hands finally beginning to caress your back.
Paige looked down at you, a soft smile on her lips. "I'm sorry for ignoring you, pretty."
You glanced up at her with a small smile. "It's okay, you made it up."
Paige's soft smile formed into a cocky smirk as she shrugged. "Yeah and I did it with no fingers, huh?"
"None, cus you're just like that," you mumbled as she laughed softly, pulling you closer.
Tumblr media
↳ make sure to check out my navigation or masterlist if you enjoyed! any interaction is greatly appreciated !
↳ thank you for reading all the way through, as always ♡
426 notes · View notes
ask-the-rag-dolly · 2 days
Text
okay unhinged essay about ragatha probably #1 idk i don't think this is all of my thoughts but here's what i could actually put down
i think the most surprising thing for me Personally is getting a lot of my interpretations of ragatha correct ? like . the thing that almost destroyed my motivation for this blog is the fear that my unhinged overanalyzation of her mannerisms in the pilot were Wrong - i actually thought about canceling everything when i was off from canon - but now ... yeah i'm not doing that
i guess it's just that we had so little of her in the first episode that i thought i was Manifesting her issues but Nope she really is this much of a Loser
first of all ! i suspected that she has low self-esteem but Goodness Gracious !! i didn't expect it to be Actually almost non-existent ?? like i thought i was Exaggerating for this blog but no , no person with a normal amount of self-esteem would Warp an incident so much in their head that they somehow believe something going wrong is Their Fault .
Tumblr media Tumblr media
like she's so focused on pomni the entire episode because she Genuinely believes that the fiasco in the first day was her fault ( even though IT WASN'T , but she's really that used to quickly blaming herself ) and wants to make it up to her . but of course pomni is still adjusting and is Overwhelmed by everything ( which is understandable ) so she's not really in the mood for ragatha's bullshit
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
but with how ragatha reacts and what she subsequently tells kinger - she read those more as ' i do not like you ' than ' i am too fatigued to care about anything right now ' which is such a Large leap , but considering she was the one who Apologized to pomni for giving her a stressful first day ( which was COMPLETELY out of her control , ) it makes sense that she assumes that pomni has something against her - which was not helped by how none of ragatha's attempts of starting a friendship were reciprocated
i do understand why she would Think it's her fault - as pomni's a newcomer and More Stress is the last thing she needs , especially in her first day - but ' oh she doesn't like me ' is still Such a hasty conclusion that someone who already ... Doesn't Like Themself would jump to .
Tumblr media Tumblr media
of course i can't not talk about the potential history between her and kinger . through their dialogue you can tell that ragatha's one of those people that took a batshit long time to truly adjust to the circus - which has a lot of interesting implications . with how she seems to understand the process of finding an exit in episode 1 , it explains a lot . my girl was so Not well when she entered the circus .
honestly it's just nice seeing that ragatha at least has Some support despite her being the one who holds everything together - it makes the ending impactful in my opinion ; they do really care for each other and will be saddened if one of them is gone .
Tumblr media Tumblr media
also of course she asked if everyone's alright despite having a cleaver to the head ...
something that also has been nagging me for a long time is how much she always gets the short end of the stick . like , literally every time she's on screen , she Has To Get Harmed in some way . i would brush this off as slapstick when her official pin doesn't have her HAVING A KNIFE TO THE CHEST ???
Maybe it's just slapstick . maybe with her having parallels to kaufmo considering how he's said to be a goofy toxic positivity type guy like ragatha and is the one that has abstracted thus far is just a coincidence and doesn't speak levels to what might become inevitable as the series goes on ,
463 notes · View notes
Text
Tumblr media
Season of Love (6/?)
+18 | Toto x reader fem!teamprincipal
Summary: One night on a pier in Monaco, while admiring the sea under the night skies, you told Toto, "I came to the conclusion that love is simply not meant for me." That was the answer to a question you have been asking yourself for the longest time. But what if he proved you wrong. Pairing: Toto Wolff x reader team principal. Genre: Romance, comedy, and some good drama. Author's note: We are so back! Thank you for your support and comments; read you soon!
< Previous chapter | Masterlist | Next chapter >
Dances with Wolff Arc Chapter 6: Collision at Turn 1
UK
Sam and Toto go to the Soft Serve Society in London the following day to have milkshakes. They share a sizeable Instagram-able shake, asking for two straws instead of one. 
The place is intimate and small, perfect for chatting. Its location in a trendy neighborhood gives Sam the ideal excuse to pull that Thom Browne boyish suit out of her suitcase.
As Sam is asking for two matcha cookies to complement their order, she notices Toto smiling like an idiot at his iPhone screen.
—Wow, that time you two spent apart did wonders for your relationship. I thought it was a "cease and desist" situation, as if there wouldn't be a turning point, but I haven't seen you like this in a long time.
—How? —Toto moves his gaze to Sam, a bit perplexed.
—Stupidly in love. So you two are genuinely back?
—Oh, that... well, we are trying this open relationship thing. Actually, I wanted to talk to you about it.
Sam gives him a judgy look, her eyebrows slightly frowning. —Let me guess. Susie suggested it; you said no, then she pressured you, and you followed along. There is no need to explain further; I get it.
Toto shrugs and barely nods his head.
—It's always what Susie wants, isn't it? You are so blind sometimes —she sounds now annoyed.
—I thought you, of all people, would get it. You see love differently than in the traditional way. Preferences aside, you are more free regarding feelings and partners.
—Yes, yet I'm not into playing with other people's feelings. 
—I'm not being played or playing with her feelings.
—To which one of the two hers are you referring?
A silence.
It's the first time Sam addresses the elephant in the room. 
—Listen, I don't want to overstep, and God knows I don't want to get in the middle; I love you both; yes, I said that, and stop smiling like that, but for fuck sake, you two need to communicate and talk! LIKE TALK! I know it's not my place, and I have tried to remain as neutral as possible, but I genuinely care about Y/N; there's more you need to know about each other because this thing is going to blow in your faces the worst way.
—What's on this? Is this really happening? You telling me how you are feeling? —Toto picks up the shake to smell it, making a funny face and trying to lighten the mood. He also avoids giving Sam an answer but pays attention to her every word.
—Oh, fuck off —Sam pushes him a bit roughly.
—Sugar sure is a drug! —Toto's holding a laugh.
-
—How did your day out with Toto go?
—How do you know we went out? Stalker!
In response, you give Sam an exaggerated insulted expression (hand over your chest and open wide mouth). —He texted me when you two were at the ice cream place! He even sent me these pictures! —you show her the conversation. —By the way, that outfit of yours is CUTE!
—Oh! It was you then —she says quickly and softly.
—Sorry? —you look at Sam as if another head grew from her neck.
—Oh, nothing. Toto didn't mention anything. He was just smiling like an idiot and giggling like a teenager, looking all in love at his phone screen.
—All what? Sam, what you said?! —you feel your heart in your throat.
—Did you follow my advice? —she cuts your shenanigans.
—I tried to follow it and address our "situation," but he rushed to get wine. He ran from the conversation, and I didn't feel like having it much, either. I knew how it was going to end.
—Well, keep pushing, trust me.
—Is there something I should worry about? —you suddenly stop and look straight at her.
—It's not my place to tell —Sam answers neutrally.
Then you two board your jet with directions home, your new home, Monaco. 
Now, thanks to Sam's words, an eerie sentiment fills your head. Is she trying to warn you something?
-
It's a quiet flight; well, if it wasn't for Samanta's snoring, not even an English Bulldog snores that loud. 
Which makes you laugh hard; you have forgotten how terrible Sam sleeps. 
It's been a while since you two slept nearby, which was the most common thing for all those years you lived at the Manor.
You have always been very much like sisters.
You take out your phone and start recording a video of Sam sound asleep with T-rex arms, open mouth, and loudly snoring, all weirdly placed on the comfy, big seat next to you.
-
Monaco
Why, every time you land in Monaco, your mind is in desperate need of a Toto detox?
-
As soon as you are in the car ride home, you hit the send button on the "Get a grip, loca🏎!" group chat.
After you share the video of Sam sleeping, a long list of replies and reactions appear in the group.
She threatens to murder you in your sleep.
-
Two nights after being back, when Charles enters the apartment wearing the world's most oversized outfit while trying to juggle four bottles of wine - one held under his chin - and a big fancy grocery bag while avoiding stepping on "Robbie" - your Roomba robot - you feel so at home; this couldn't be a more domestic scene for you two before you rush to help him.
Never mind, too late! Now, the kitchen floor looks like a crime scene. 
God, how much you missed him! Keeping your friendship while hiding it from the rest of the Scuderia has been difficult. 
Ferrari is a hermetic group that likes it that way; being extra friendly with the enemy could cost Charles' head, thanks to Binotto's paranoia.
—FUCK! FUCK AND FUCK! —he lets out, looking at the now red floor, followed by various French cursings coming out of that pouty mouth. 
—At least the other three survived —you hear Sam say, entering behind him and holding two more bottles and a cake.
—Several bottles of wine and lots of food. This is an intervention for me, isn't it? —you ask, looking at them suspiciously.
Both of them energetically nod.
—We need to talk about Bruno —Charles jokes; he obviously means Toto while grabbing the paper towel on the kitchen counter to try cleaning his mess, which is as useless as you expected.
—Damn —is all you let out.
At some point, Charles gives up and prefers leaving a fat tip and a Post-it for Rosita when she comes clean tomorrow morning.
-
—Hi, I have a quick question: How much do you weigh?
A text from Toto comes in the early hours of the day as you are about to hit the treadmill in your luxurious building's training center. You rushed down there, unable to sleep a second more.
After the intervention, you comprehend lots of things need to change.
—(Y/N's weight), why? —you reply. 
It's still dark outside.
Only you and three others are alone in the enormous gym section, which feels quiet and isolated, perfect for decompressing. 
Apparently, when Toto and you are apart, you are both early birds. It's always a snooze fest when you two are tangled in sheets. Probably, it's because he makes the world's most fabulous pillow or because he loves having you wrapped in his arms.
Judging by his text's unusual hours, he may be overthinking it too. Lately, you have felt driven to exercise earlier in the morning as well to avoid losing your sanity.
A couple of minutes later, a video of Toto adjusting the weight of his barbells to your weight before doing a couple of hip thrusts comes as a reply.
You watch the video a couple of times, okay, several times, before hitting the reply button. —I can help you do some repetitions if you want; I know a very effective routine! My trainer also advised me I needed more cardio —you tease him, feeling a tingle down there, hehe. 
Fuck! You are falling for it again, and you just swore to Sam and Charles that there would be no Toto during this break!
As Toto reads your text, a pleased smirk forms on his lips, and then he exhales and returns to exercise. 
He shouldn't be feeling this desperate for your attention. It has been only the first week without seeing you.
The way you have turned his life upside down is unimaginable.
-
—Your girl is in town! —Normani sends a selfie of herself in the group chat, throwing a pose on the Monaco pier, looking flawless and stylish in a two-piece Casablanca outfit (an orange thee with colorful stripes and shorty shorts and pulling the coolest glasses) while blowing a kiss. —Let's hang out tonight!😈😈
—OH, I KNOW JUST THE PLACE —Lando writes back.
—Italy.
Several "???" appear.
—I'm in Italy —Seb clarifies.
Now, it makes sense.
—Someone needs to help Seb with this, really —George says.
—Let's take him to one of those free classes at the Apple store, you know, with the senior citizens —Checo jokes. —I'm with Carola's parents and the kids in Guadalajara, so we are out of the fun this time.
—Tell Carola I love her —you request Checo.
—I will, thx.
—I don't wish for an apple, thank you —Seb replies.
—Dear God —Lewis texts.
—Jk! Jk! I'm not that inept, and I'm not yet a senior citizen, but soon, 2032 let's go! —Seb exits the conversation.
—Lando, send the location —Lewis texts. —That's great to know, Seb. I'm already saving for our turbo wheelchairs to challenge you in races at the retirement home.
—There, see you guys at 1 a.m.
—I want to live enough to witness that, Lewis —Mick enters the conversation.
—This club looks like a shithole! I don't wish for my organs to get stolen —Charles points out after looking for the place on Google Maps; it's only a run-down facade photo of the place in a not-that-neat street.
—Trust me, you are going to love it —Lando comments.
—Is it private? —Lewis asks. —Cause last time we went out in London, getting us out of there was a nightmare.
—That's precisely why I'm suggesting this place!
—Spain.
—I'm in Spain —Carlos texts, mocking Seb. —Have fun without me, guys, even though I don't think you can. Send pictures. I miss you, my friends.
—Te extraño, too🙇‍♀️ —you reply, Carlos, you have become fond of him.
—🥰🥰 —Carlos sends.
—I'm liking this sketchy, mysterious place already —Sam joins in.
—Sam, is Millie still in town? —you ask her, you met Millie for brunch two days ago.
—No, I already left 😭😭😭. Mick invited me to hike in Patagonia—a photo of them out in nature follows her text. 
—Okay, the ones who are going, please send a hands-up emoji; I'm booking the table —Lando texts.
-
You make your way through the winding streets of Monaco on Charles' bike at full speed; you are sure you flashed at least four people with that party mini dress you are wearing as you head to the mysterious nightclub. 
As soon as you park, you agree with Charles that it looks like a sketchy part of town, but the faint sound of pulsing music and the flickering lights emanating from a door down a narrow corridor between two buildings right in front of you quickly distract you and guides you in.
Soon, as you enter and go down the long stairs, you are immediately enveloped in a world of luxury "decadence." 
The atmosphere is electric, and the air is heavy with the scent of exotic perfumes. 
—It smells like good sex —is what Lando tells you as he greets you, looking at your two "trying to discover the scent" faces.
The walls are decorated with striking artwork, each more provocative and daring than the last.
For sure, this place is the stage for many wild escapades.
As almost everyone gets there, the group is drawn to the center of the club, near where the main stage, lit up with swirling lights and seductive, almost naked dancers. 
Your table in the VIP area "it has the best location in the place", again, according to Lando.
As you sit next to Nomani, who gave you the world's greatest greeting hug, you get mesmerized by the hypnotic rhythm of the music and the dancers' graceful motions. 
You get transfixed, unable to tear your eyes away from them. Gorgeous he/she/they are on the stage.
—Beer, gin, what are we drinking? —Normani asks you.
—Tequila —you answer too quickly for her and Sam's amusement.
—Tequila, it is! —she says loudly and makes a little dance, shaking the girls around. The more than happy waiter witnesses it before getting the bottle.
You pour everyone a shot to start the night. Lewis just arrived, and George is running late as usual.
—Can you smell it? —you ask everyone.
A couple of "What?" come along.
—The regret —you joke as you all take the shot.
The group then goes full party core, joining the pulsating dance floor and losing themselves in the music. 
Laughter and shouts fill the air as the exotic dancers approach you and the crowd to exchange some sensual moves.
Amidst the chaos and allure of the night, Toto arrives. Unexpectedly.
Charles and Sam instantly look at you, almost throwing you darts.
—I swear to God I didn't invite him!
George did.
-
As alcohol skyrockets Lando, he starts doing push-ups for you in the middle of the dance floor as a techno-dub mix of Olivia Newton John's and Dua Lipa's "Physical" starts playing while he looks straight at you.
—Is that supposed to impress me? —you raise an eyebrow, cross your arms, and lean on Lewis, who is also witnessing the action.
—Is it working?
—Never stop believing in your dreams —you laugh it off, and Toto playfully rolls his eyes at him, then winks at you.
"Oh, God, I'm weak! I'm not going to resist the temptation."
—The dancer with the jockstrap hasn't taken his eyes off you the entire night —Toto points out for Normani, gesturing to which one he refers.
Normani makes a "definitely wouldn't mind" expression. —Too bad I don't do one-night stands —she confesses.
—Like ever? —Lewis looks at her like she is from Mars.
—Hopeless romantic right here! —Normi answers. —I like to party, but I'm so old-fashioned. Thanks, Mom!
—What a classy lady, indeed! —George says.
—It's my Britishness britishing —she jokes. —I want a husband, a big house in the countryside, horses and babies, you know, the traditional.
—Like, literally, this is the worst place to discuss family! —Sam warns them with a "Don't kill the mood, guys" look.
—The worst! —you all burst out laughing.
—I'm not sure if she is messing with us or..? —Lando comes closer to saying to Charles.
—No, really! It's my biggest wish. I can't wait to be a mom! —Normani lets out. 
—But you are so young! —everyone looks so shocked at her. Quite the revelation!
—I KNOW, but I want four! So, I better hurry up.
—FOUR?!! —everyone kind of screams in response.
Normani looks at them with a big smile, happy with the chaos her confession is causing.
—I get you, girl. I do love one myself; I have wanted to be a mom for years now. I feel I'm close to adopting one, but I need to do something with my schedule first. It would be impossible with a baby!
Toto listens to your conversation, very quiet and still, looking as if something inside him broke.
-
—Hey, I want to talk to you privately. I have something important to tell you; it's been on my mind for a while —Toto approaches you to whisper in your ear.
—Oh, sure, yeah —you agree to. "Okay, breathe, the moment it's coming."
When you reach a quiet spot to talk without all the people buzzing around, the loud background noises, and the almost butt-naked performers, you two remain there in an awkward silence for a minute.
Toto looks like he wants to say something but doesn't, so you break the ice first, feeling your hands shaking a bit.
—So what do you want to tell me that's so important?
He looks straight at you and takes two steps to close the distance between you. —Ahem, so... so what are you planning for... for the off-season? —he takes you off guard.
"Okay, this is not what I was expecting."
—I... I don't know... yet.
—Maybe we could spend it together. I know a private island that would be perfect —Toto offers you, totally improvising.
—Oh, I see...
—I mean... if you want to.
—No, no, of course, I want to!
—Perfect, then —he says, his voice deep. Toto then takes your hand, and you're surprised by the warmth from his touch.
"Coward" "Selfish" is all Toto thinks for himself. "But I don't want to lose her. I need her just a bit more. I don't know how to quit her."
—What do you say if we continue this conversation somewhere even more private? —Toto invites you, his intense dark eyes piercing right through you. 
Before you have time to respond, he takes your hand and leads you toward the exit at the back of the place and into his car.
Soon, you arrive at his luxurious penthouse, abandoning almost all of your party clothes in the process. 
You glance around the dimly lit living room, admiring its opulence. The walls are decorated with fine art, and the scent of wealth lingers in every corner.
Toto, already bare-chested, removes the rest of his clothes, revealing himself. You can't help but stare at his toned abs, defined muscles, and delicious dick. 
He smirks, noticing your admiration, and pushes you closer to the sofa. It creaks softly under your weight as he sits you down, eyes locked onto each other.
—You're stunning —Toto says while tracing his fingers down your body as you remove your last piece of clothing.
Your pulse quickens at his touch, and you move in, pressing your lips hard against his.
Toto's tongue sneaks its way between your parted lips as he pulls your naked body close to his. You moan softly.
Slowly, he leans back onto the plush pillows, taking you with him. Your bodies intertwine in a passionate embrace, enjoying the heat from his broad chest into you as you run your hands all over him, feeling every inch of Toto pressing against your core.
He grabs you by the hips, grinding you against him forcefully, causing an excited whimper to escape your lips. You can't help but crave his every single inch.
Sliding yourself lower, you feel him harden beneath you. —Fuck, you're so hard —you whisper into his ear as you stroke his length up and down. 
Toto flips you onto your back, not letting you control the show yet, spreading your legs wide. He effortlessly glides both of his hands beneath your ass, lifting you up like you weigh nothing.
His left-hand squeezes your ass cheek possessively while his right supports your lower back. Then Toto lowers his mouth to your inner thigh, his tongue trailing a path of wetness up to your core, where he tastes you. 
You gasp, your breath hitching whenever his tongue flicks your clit.
Plunging his tongue deep inside you, he tastes the sweetness of your essence. Moving back up to your clit, he sucks hard, provoking you to tremble under the pleasure.
Your fingers entangle his thick hair, tugging and pushing as waves of delight roll over your body. 
Toto stares at your swollen clit and massages it gently, building an almost unbearable tension in the pit of your stomach before he slides first one finger, then two inside of you, feeling you tighten around them as he moves them in deliberate circles.
—What the fuck, you feel incredible —he mumbles against your folds. He increases his pace, sucking harder, flicking faster until you are shuddering against him, gasping for breath, about to break apart.
Your vision gets blurry as an involuntary moan escapes your lips.
—I'm so fucking close —you cry out, inarticulate with pleasure. Toto looks up and climbs back up your body, kissing and nipping at your soft flesh as he goes up until his thighs are between yours.
—You want me to make you come, don't you? —he whispers seductively, nibbling on your earlobe.
You nod, biting your lip. You need Toto to fill you, to end this unbearable craving he had built inside you.
—Please, Toto —you beg, thrusting your hips upward. A desperate whimper tears from your throat when your sexes don't meet.
Toto chuckles softly, smirking at your desperation. —Then fuck me —he murmurs, placing you on top of him, inviting you to ride him right there, inviting you to guide him inside of you. —Fuck me hard.
The feeling of him filling you up, inch by inch, sends waves of ecstasy through your body. —Oh, god, yes —you moan, encouraging him deeper.
Your bodies move together in perfect harmony as you ride waves of pleasure. Toto grunts and groans with each bounce, whispering obscenities in your ear as you cowgirl him with an arched back, panting heavily. Wetness pools between you as your sweat-slicked bodies slap together rhythmically.
Toto grabs your hands and pins them behind your back, changing the angle of his thrusts. He hits a spot deep within you that sends shivers down your spine, producing a guttural moan from your lips. 
He smirks at the sound and repeats the action, watching your reaction with fascination.
—Fuuck —you cry out, every muscle tensing as your fingers curl into fists. 
Toto continues to plow into you, each thrust harder and deeper than the last, making your tits bounce without control, making you a mess. 
You look down at him to see your bodies moving in a slick rhythm, leaving trails of sweat and lust on your skin. He looks wild, eyes burning with desire and mouth parted in a low growl as the scent of sex permeates the air around you.
You whimper as he releases one of your wrists, allowing you to wrap your hand around your breast. Your fingers tease your sensitive nipple, sending a fresh wave of sensation flooding through you.
Toto watches you touch yourself, entranced by the movement of your hand on your breast as his thrusts become erratic.
—Fuck, you're so goddamn beautiful —he mutters roughly, his hips slamming into yours hard. The sound of your bodies colliding resonates throughout the room, mixing with your erratic breathing. 
—You like that? —Toto asks, smirking at your eager expression. You feel yourself getting closer to the edge, ready to burst at any moment.
Toto's dark eyes pierce into you, watching every twitch of your face and every moan of breath.
His thrusts become more deliberate, each one pressing into your womb.
—Fuckkk —Toto groans loudly, struggling to contain himself. His muscles tense as he gives it to you very fast; sweat drips down his face, onto his chest, and you.
—Toto! —you moan very loud as you come all over his dick.
—I need you —he confesses to you as he is about to come. You bounce hard and desperately on his cock, till you hear him grunting loud; a mess of panting Toto fills you up.
-
Ferrari's big anniversary is coming up next weekend, and they are set to throw the biggest party ever, a very fancy gala that will take place in Rome, or so Charles discloses to you.
—I'm actually excited for this one! —then he turns to show you the jewelry bracelet he likes before trying it on while cheerfully chit-chatting.
—This one is more your style, I like it better —you agree with his pick, as you two are out shopping.
While the sales lady adjusts it to his wrist measurements, Charles continues telling you: —This party has been in the making for so long, and all the rumors we have been hearing about it from the planners keep getting better; it honestly sounds so good!
You attentively listen to him while trying on a set of butterfly diamond earrings. Yes, you need them.
He continues: —I really wish I could take you like my plus one! But I'm taking my mom; I promised her way before meeting you.
—Oh, sweetie, no worries! But do tell me more about it. Sounds fabulous.
—Well, it will be very VIP, with only big clients, a couple of A-lister celebrities, and influential motorsports people. There's a lot of gossip about what or who will be the entertainment.
—I guess I'm not part of the big names of motorsports yet because I haven't been invited, haha. Mattia doesn't like me, isn't it?
—He is not your biggest fan, but almost no one has been invited; as far as I know, it's just the Scuderia and people Mattia considers his "paddock friends." —Charles gestures with his hands. —And some special guests with a history with the brand, like Niki. He is going! I know because Sam is his plus one; she told me yesterday.
—Maybe I should buy Ferrari to party with you at that fabulous event —you laugh it off as you sign the check for the earrings.
—And to party with Niki —Charles adds, joking.
—I heard he goes hard! —you joke back. Nowadays, if Niki stays up after 10 p.m., he considers it a wild night, in his words.
-
As you are about to finish your grilled salmon at that gorgeous "Gaia" restaurant in Monte Carlo, your phone buzzes on top of the white mantelpiece, grabbing your attention.
—Didn't you lose something?
—Not that I know.
—How weird, cause I have this plus one ticket with your name on it.
—Haha. You got me!
—Feeling like going to a fancy party in Rome?
—A getaway trip to Italy? SIGN ME UP! —you happily reply, already thinking about what you will wear.
-
Rome
As the sun descended over the iconic Roman Colosseum, flashing cameras lit the red carpet at the ancient structure's entrance. 
Sleek Ferraris pull up, each more luxurious than the previous, dropping the celebrities and high-profile guests off to make their grand entrances, dressed in the most glamorous outfits and adorned in shining jewels. 
Amidst all that circus, you two stay on the sidelines, watching the spectacle unfold before quietly skipping the paparazzi and splitting apart to enter the temporarily built ballroom.
—Surprise! —you extend your arms to Leclerc; he is now fresh off the red carpet, the one you avoid to keep it as discreet as possible.
A prominent smile forms on the lips of the Monagesque. —We could have shared the flight here, you know! Instead of you flying here all by yourself —Charles rolls his eyes at you and then hugs you. —I really believed you when you said you didn't get invited. You got me!
"But I didn't fly by myself!" You want to correct him on that, but you don't.
Inside, the atmosphere is as opulent as outside. Red lights illuminate the ancient structure, and lavish decorations adorn every table set. Cirque du Soleil performers move gracefully through the crowds, dazzling costumes twirling and shimmering as they entertain the guests with their mesmerizing acts.
You take in all the sights and sounds of the extravagant gala surrounding you, where motorsport legends mingle with billionaires, entertainers, engineers, celebrities, and beautiful models. 
Laughter, loud music, and chatter fill the air, along with the clinking of champagne glasses.
-
After having a blast dancing around, chatting, and goofing an hour later, you go to look for Sam, knowing she must be somewhere around. 
But the place is enormous, the crowd is big, and no luck so far; she is nowhere to be seen.
You get tired of searching for her and go to the bathroom. By this point, you have had many drinks, "Damn, that waiting line is long!"
As you try to find something to entertain you while you wait, you start scanning the place with your eyes, observing every gorgeous detail, when the silhouette of a beautiful blond woman steals your attention. Four girls in front of you in the line, there is Susie.
She is as beautiful as you expected her to be in person but more petite; she looks fit and fierce but kind. You can't help but stare at her before wondering what she is doing here. Then a "Duh! Idiot! She is a big name in motorsports!" hits you.
-
As you return to your table from grabbing chocolate-covered strawberries a bit later, you run into Sam.
She stares at you with the widest eyes ever, completely surprised. —What? —she lets out, standing still.
—Surprise! —you reach to hug her. —I have been looking for you all damn night! —she barely hugs you, and your big smile starts to fade away. —Is all good? —you ask, concern while looking straight at her.
—I'm so sorry, Y/N. I genuinely am —she mumbles. Samanta's features are full of dismay.
—Sam, you are worrying me.
She gestures to you to turn around.
"Oh, there is that feeling you remember so well." 
That awful fucking feeling of getting your heart shattered. Like a bullet going through the flesh, a sting of pure pain as if your heart was glass and was getting crushed by a hammer, pure and profound pain as you watch Susie wrapped around Toto's neck with no inch of space in between them, standing by the Mercedes guest table, sharing soft kisses and pets. 
Yet you are so skilled at hiding your feelings that it requires an expert - like Sam - to figure you out.
With a neutral face, you faintly say: —I need a moment.
—Y/N... I will go with you...
—I need a moment, I... I need to get fresh air. I will be right back —you start walking in the opposite direction to them, and Sam follows your every step.
—Y/N. I'm here for you...
—I'll be back, Sam. I need a moment, please —you make her stop following you around. So she contains herself and watches you walk away, worried about you. 
Sam knows your mental health hangs from a fragile thread.
-
—I want a Tequila and tonic with three tequila shots in it, please —Samanta brusquely drops herself on her seat at the Mercedes guest table and asks the waiter for a heavy drink.
—That would be two, please. You have learned from the master herself. Where is she, tho? I spotted Y/N and was going to greet her, but I got distracted by a sexy lady asking for a selfie. Now I don't know where she went to —Lewis asks while looking around, trying to spot you among the crowds.
The music is loud, so conversing is challenging if you aren't near enough.
—She's outside chatting with Vettel —Charles inserts himself in the conversation between a pissed-off Sam and a clueless Lewis, arriving a bit rushed at the table and placing himself between their two chairs.
—Hi mate! —Lewis pats his arm, and half hugs him while still sitting. Charles rubs his shoulder in response.
—Hey, Sam. I made the changes you suggested to my speech. Do you approve? —Leclerc hands her a folded piece of paper; "She is out there crying" is written in big caps.
Sam and Charles exchange warry looks.
—It's perfect. I will help you practice it.
—Great idea, let's g...
A loud "ow" sound from the crowd interrupts them. A tray hits the floor loudly, followed by glasses breaking. It's all coming from far on their left. 
They all turn their heads toward the noise, as does almost everyone in the entire place.
—I'm so so sorry! Oh my god! I'm an idiot! Please forgive me! —a very distraught and nervous Vettel apologizes frantically to you. 
He accidentally crashed into the waiter holding a tray of wine glasses as he crossed paths with you, the ones that landed all over you, fucking up your dress, before smashing on the floor. 
Which made poetic sense since you felt wounded, and now you looked like it.
You could sense Toto's eyes burning into you. You weren't supposed to be there.
Lewis gets on his feet. —Jesus, poor Y/N —and he notices how Toto looks utterly shaken by seeing you here and looking whiter than a ghost, and at that moment, he gets it. Fuck.
—Seb, Seb, SEB! —you raise your voice as Vettel keeps apologizing and talking nonstop. —It's okay, sweetie. No worries; I will go change! It's all okay.
—I'm sorry. Please forgive me; let me escort you out. It's the least I can do.
—Okay. Fine —you finally agree, looking a bit done with Seb.
You two start walking to the exit, which is all the other way around for your fucking luck. As you depart, you can hear the people whispering and staring at you. 
A frozen Toto watches you walk past them, and you can't help it; for the briefest moment, you make eye contact with him before Vettel blocks the view.
—Sebastian Vettel, you are a good man —Sam whispers.
—What? —Charles reaches even closer to her.
—Y/N is not coming back. Seb was her exit out. 
—Was that on purpose?!!
—Yes. That's why you saw them talking out there, for sure.
—Are they that close? Since when? I had no fucking clue.
—Since Y/N set foot on the paddock —Sam replies, knowing the whole story. —She's an expert at hiding in plain sight.
—Should we check on her? —Lewis turns to them, still on his feet, looking tense.
—Y/N will be fine; she always is —Sam says aloud for the entire table to hear. She can feel Toto's eyes on her but doesn't care to look back at him.
-
Vettel takes you inside a black-tinted Suburban. As the chauffeur speeds away from the Colosseum, he holds your hand and never lets it go.
Seb asks you to stay at his place so he can care for you and keep you company, and you agree.
You two cuddle in the back seat while you cry in his arms all the ride to his place. 
It's a long one.
You don't know if it's because your heart is shattering into a million pieces, or because you feel vulnerable right now, or just cause Seb is such a kind and precious being that you pour all out. 
You let him know everything, every single fucking detail about your fling with Torger and how you feel right now. You had never been so forthcoming with anyone about this, not even Sam.
—I'm so sorry about how the night turned out; I invited you as my plus-one with the idea of having the best time. I wish I had known all of this before! Finding it out this way, gosh, that's harsh —Seb tells you, with a mixture of mortification and sadness.
—You aren't the one who should apologize! Hey, at least we had a good time on the flight here. Thanks to you, now I want to build hundreds of hotels for the bees.
He smiles brightly before adding: —Right now, you need to rest and feel, let it all out of your system, and tomorrow start new! I'm here for you.
—Thanking for acting out that exit; you deserve an Oscar.
—I have been mistaken for Brad Pitt before, you know —he jokes to try to make you smile, but it's in vain. —You are a good actress, too.
-
You crash on his couch. Barely making it inside, collapsing as soon as you cross the entrance door, feeling drained.
You have experienced the "heart broke syndrome" before and know how it goes, so you needed to lie down ASAP.
-
After God knows how many minutes since you blacked out on the sofa, you hear a noise above you. You slightly and a bit unwillingly open your eyes to see Seb covering you with a remarkably soft blanket that feels so delicious. He drops a puffy pillow on the rug beside you and lays himself down there next to the couch.
You move to face him as he gets comfy there on the floor. —What are you doing?
—Oh, shit, did I wake you up? I'm staying here if you don't mind —he looks at you with apprehension in those stunning eyes.
—You are the sweetest —you tell him as you slowly drift off, exhausted.
As you fall asleep again, you understand now why Lewis dared risk it all for Seb and start wondering what happened to those two.
-
You wake up disoriented and feeling anxious. 
It's still dark. 
Seb is profoundly asleep and relaxed in the blueish-tinted living room, with the moonlight sneaking through the large windows. 
You stay there, unable to sleep but with zero energy to move. You observe his breathing, which weirdly helps you soothe yourself when suddenly, your phone screen lights up, stealing your gaze.
You try to reach for it since Seb placed your purse and phone on the coffee table at arm's distance before going to look for an oversized T-shirt that could work you as pajamas. 
It's a simple text from Toto. "Can I please talk to you?"
As you navigate your phone, you notice many missed calls from Sam, Charles, and Lewis.
Well, now it's clear communication and sincerity weren't your thing. You weren't one of those couples. 
Were you even a couple?
"Maybe it's best this way," is all you reply to him before turning your phone off.
Tears start coming down again as your phone screen dims and fades to black again.
-
The following day, Seb offers you to stay for as long as you wish, and you will take his word for it.
You don't feel like returning to the city you share with Toto; it's way too risky for you to be in Monaco. 
You need time to compose yourself. A lot is about to happen soon, and you need to be at your best. You can't fail. To be continued... < Previous chapter | Masterlist | Next chapter >
53 notes · View notes
ktaerssoi · 10 hours
Note
can you do a paige fic where paige is down bad like reaaaly down bad only has eyes for reader but reader is so oblivious and paige gets all sad and reader doesn’t know so then paige is like i fucking love you??
its always been you
relationship: paige bueckers x fem!reader based on this request! tysm for answering my post 😭 summary: paige has only ever had eyes for you. notes: omg this was actually sm fun to write tysm and also i would love to hear more of those requests you speak of. anyway ty again!! - kate not proof read!
"i mean really, she thinks she's the shit and just needs to shut up." you were going on yet another rant as you walked through your front door, paige not far behind with your leftovers from lunch.
"mhm, well maybe you need to express to her what she's doing wrong." paige sighs as she opens the fridge to put the food away, grabbing and water for you and herself.
"thanks," you grab the water bottle from her, leaning against the counter. "i guess, but anyway, how have you been." you nudge her playfully with your shoulder, giggling. "any girlsss?"
you watch as her face flushes and she rolls her eyes. you see the smirk on her face as she turns away, letting you know that there was most definitely a girl.
"oooo, who?" you watch as she turns back to you shrugging, taking another sip of water. "i plead the fifth." its your turn to roll your eyes as she keeps her mouth shut.
"oh come on, p! were adults! you can tell me who you think is cute, i wont judge." you cross your arms as you move to stand in front of her, blocking her in slightly. she shakes her head and smiles at you, and the look she gives you is different from the normal ones. she looks at you like you're the only person she ever wants to know.
"i don't know, i don't think you want to know. you guys are sort of close and i wouldnt want to make it awkward, y'know?" she makes direct eye contact with you, you guys standing at the same height due to her leaning on the counter.
"uh yeah, i mean i guess so but i wouldn't tell her." your shoulders drop a little, you didn't want to push her but you were also sort of hurt that your own best friend didn't want to tell you about a girl she liked.
"you seriously don't have any thoughts at who it could be? she's not on the basketball team." paige stands up straighter, now towering over you slightly.
not on the basketball team? paige's life is basketball, i'm like the only friend she has that doesn't live basketball 24/7
needless to say, you were confused. (and dense as hell my gosh)
"is it that one chick that you had to do that group assignment with? the really pretty girl with the braids?" you were thinking to everyone you had seen apige interact with that wasn't on the team, other than yourself you were lost.
"no, you guys are close remember?" paige is looking at you like this is the most obvious thing ever, and you just stare up at her utterly confused.
"you're horrible at this whole hint thing." you mumble, shaking your head as you walk toward the living room to continue your thinking.
paige follows behind sort of deflated, plopping down on the couch next to you, slouching down so her head could rest on your shoulder. "no i mean really, who could it be?" she shakes her head as she goes to grab the remote.
you watch as she channel surfs for the next ten minutes, not finding anything good and eventually turning off the t.v.. "take one more guess and then i'll tell you who it is." paige looks up at you from her spot on your chest.
"okay um, is it that one media girl that were friends with? the one who always comes to dinners with us??" paige's eyebrows furrow, and she giggles to herself a litte, shaking her head.
"nope, but listen, if- if i tell you, you have to swear to me that things won't change. okay?" you nod at her words, never have you seen her this strict.
"are you sure it's not the media girl?" you narrow your eyes as she sits up, sitting across from you now.
"no y/n, its you. i like you. no, fuck it, i love you. i mean, you're amazing and you're the sweetest, funniest person i know and i'm not even totally sure if you're into girls like that but i can help but like you."
she bites her nails as you nod, you're quiet for a moment before you smile. "you think i'm funny?" paige rolls her eyes at you and stands up from the couch, scared that you're trying to let her down easy.
"so if that's a rejection i'm just going to go-" paige gets cut off by you springing up and grabbing her hand to stop her. "definitely not a rejection. i like you too p, like a love type of like. just to clarify." you shrug as you drop her hand, struggling to express that you really do feel the same.
"seriously? you're not just saying that because you're my best friend and you feel bad?" she's looking down at you, studying your face for your honest answer. once you nod you feel her hand on your waist and feel yourself be pulled forward.
your body is flush against hers, you've been in this exact position countless times before, but right now everything was in a whole new light.
your eyes flash down to paige's lips, and then back to her eyes, and to her lips again. "you're really pretty." you mumble, not even thinking about what you were saying anymore.
you watch as her cheeks get pinker, smiling at your effect on her. "shut up," she looks down at your lips, "can i kiss you?" you have never nodded so fast in your life.
her lips come crashing onto yours and it feels so right. you taste her strawberry chapstick against your lips and the smell of her shampoo consumes your senses.
pulling away after a few seconds you look up at her in awe, a stupid smile on your face.
"you really think i'm funny?"
52 notes · View notes
An Impossible Pair
Warnings: none
Word count: 987
Tumblr media
A grunt escaped your lips as you were slammed against a wall. You could feel the pounding in your head as you tried to gather yourself.
You’d like to think this event was not a rare occurrence, but you’d be lying to yourself. Ever since you crossed paths with the Mandalorian and his child, your life had been nothing but fighting. And while you’d like to complain about it, you knew that you couldn’t. For all the fighting and bruises littering your body, you’d never been happier.
Clenching your jaw, you delivered a swift kick to your assailants rib cage. He crumpled quickly to the floor giving you enough time to get ahold of your blaster. Before you could think to fire it, the Mandalorian shot him.
“I had that under control you know,” you said, humor laced clearly in your tone.
Without a word, he grabbed you by the arm and nearly dragged you to a safe corner in the room.
“Stay here,” he grumbled.
“Are you crazy?” You pointed at the door on the other side of the room. “There are nearly twenty troopers on their way here! You need my help even if you don’t want to admit it.”
“I don’t need your help,” he said pointedly. “You’ll only get in the way.”
He made a motion to leave, but you quickly grabbed him by the arm.
“I’m sorry, I mistook you for someone with a brain! There is no way I’m going to let you fight them off on your own while I’m left here to cower in the corner. Even if you are acting like a complete idiot right now, I’d still rather be out there with you. We’re supposed to be a team, remember?”
You were breathing heavy now. Eyes burning bright with anger as you looked up at him. You could feel his own anger boiling underneath. Your tension only heightened at the sound of pounding at the door.
“I don’t want you getting hurt,” he finally managed to say.
“Do you think I want you getting hurt?” You retorted with a sigh. “You’re completely impossible,” you groaned, rubbing your temples. “How I ever managed to fall in love with the likes of you.”
“What?” He replied breathlessly.
You only had enough time to glance at him before troopers began to flood their way through the door.
“This conversation isn’t over,” he yelled back at you as he took his blaster out of his holster.
Swallowing thickly, you tried not to think about your little slip up. Blaster in hand, you shot at as many of them as you could. Beside you you watched the Mandalorian get to work, he was fast, seemingly taking out one trooper after the last.
It all happened so very quickly. One minute you were firing at a trooper, your gaze shifting only for a fraction of a second before you felt a burning sensation in your chest.
You could hear your name being shouted before you fell to the floor. Letting out a gasp, you squeezed your eyes shut. You cursed yourself, you should have been more careful, should have paid more attention.
Faintly, you could hear three loud thuds. You tried to steady your breathing, the pain was almost unbearable, but you knew you’d be alright.
“Stay with me,” you heard him whisper softly. His hands roaming your body looking for more damage.
“‘M not planning on going anywhere,” you managed to mumble.”
You could hear him let out a sigh of relief.
“I told you this would happen,” he spoke, frustration clear in his tone.
“Better me than you,” you said softly, your eyes slowly blinking up at him. You could feel his pointed stare on you. “The child needs you, you’d be just fine without-”
“I need you.”
Your mouth clamped shut, as you looked into his visor.
Slowly, he rested his forehead against yours. Audibly, he took a shaky breath. Gently, you rested your hand against the side of his helmet. His hands clutched onto your sides, the both of you taking a moment to reassure the other.
“I’m sorry,” you whispered, your thumb gently stroking his helmet. “I guess we can both be impossible.”
He let out a breathy laugh, before standing. He reached his hand out to you to help you stand.
“We should go,” he said gruffly.
You nodded your head in agreement. Placing your arm over his shoulder, you both made your way over to the razor crest.
By the time you both finally made your way on board, you were exhausted beyond belief. The child made his way slowly towards you. Even in exhaustion you couldn’t deny the child’s need to be held. The child cooed in your arms, his eyes bouncing between you and the Mandalorian.
“Come on kid, I gotta fix Y/N up.” The Mandalorian picked up the child and set him down before making quick work of bandaging your wound. He was knelt before you, gloves off and fingers working deftly. How odd it was to have your heart racing at such an action, and yet it nearly took your breath away. You made no effort to hide your staring. His visor flicked towards your direction every few seconds, but he made no remark.
Clearing his throat, he stood up straight. “That should do it.” He moved awkwardly from side to side.
You smiled warmly at him, standing yourself. You made your way up to him standing face to face. Gently, you touched his shoulder before reaching back down to pick the child back up.
You could feel his eyes on you as you walked into the cockpit. Taking your seat with the child cradled in your lap, you watched as the Mandalorian took his seat. He turned to you one last time before directing his attention to the ship.
You smiled to yourself, elating at the impossibility of you both.
23 notes · View notes
tomatomagica · 20 days
Text
you can tell me it's my own doing and i feel extremely stupid saying this at all but i genuinely wish "gay way of sitting" and "bi way of sitting" and whatever else were never a thing, i didn't think it was a problem until it was and now my legs are fucked up and it takes insane effort to sit in a way that's kind to my body and not actively destructing it further
39 notes · View notes
tvuniverse · 1 month
Text
Listen i just want to preface this by saying I don't even personally hate Tommy, but that's not really the point i want to make so here goes nothing.
The way a lot of people act as if it's impossible to dislike him because the characters have moved on so so should we, right? and that's the thing right here, as poc we're always being told to move on. We can't express our feelings, we can't hold grudges, we can't complain about issues without making it something more than it is, we always have to just... move on.
I know people are going to say it's just a show, it's not that serious, but the issues it touches on and the way fandom speaks on those issues are.
I've seen a lot of comparisons between Tommy and other mains, how each of them are flawed and have screwed up one way or another, and you're right, but it's still unfair to compare him to them. We've seen each of the main characters experience guilt, or be ashamed of their action, we've seen them apologise, put in the work to actually grow, and they have. There's not enough time in an episode for us to see that for side characters. In this case, Tommy didn't do any of the above and that's normal, he was a plot device to show some very real societal issues, and especially what people of colour/women might go through in the workplace, and once he served his purpose he didn't get much more beyond a few scenes where it seemed like everything was fine between him and chim/hen. It would be more appropriate to compare him to the buckley parents, (who appeared in more or less the same amount of episodes) like if people suddendly started saying no one is allowed to hate them because they got their redemption, their kids more or less forgave them, they more or less tried to be better parents. And yet it's still not enough for a lot of people, because how they treated their children, the shit they've said to them, hits a little too close to home for a lot of people and so no matter what the show says or does, they'll still be mostly hated by the audience, and that's more than okay. But if margaret buckley is your favourite character than by all means be my guest. And listen, i love this show, it's all about hope, and it means everyone gets a redemption arc, as short as it is (sometimes even just a sentence lol), but we won't always be satisfied with these arcs, especially if they don't feel proportional to the hurt the characters may have caused to our mains, so we'll all have different reactions to them.
I swear liking a morally ambiguous/grey character says absolutely nothing about you, but making excuses for them, antagonising people who might dislike them (for good reasons) or acting like suddenly triggers don't exist for people, does say something about you. One of my favourite characters is literally the worst person ever, an actual bigot, but i won't ever write essays about why people are not allowed to dislike him actually because he's my babygirl.. i very much understand why people would.
All of this to say, everyone will have different opinions about Tommy. Some might love him, some will be completely neutral or at worst slightly uncomfortable/bothered by him, and some will straight up hate him, and all of these are fine. Live and let live, love whoever you want to love, and hate whoever you want to hate, but please stop trying to dictate how others should feel, i'm begging. And this really does go both ways.
11 notes · View notes
seariii · 8 months
Text
The argument for guilty/unforgiven Amane is not just to prevent her from hurting Shidou.
Sorry (⁠。⁠•́⁠︿⁠•̀⁠。⁠) I really don't intend to change your vote or anything, but it's been stressing me out that some people seem to believe that's it with our argument.
Tumblr media
Amane has "warned" Mahiru, which to me reads like a threat. Even if she couldn't actually kill Shidou, Mahiru here who is an easy target, who can't move properly, could easily be hurt or killed by her.
And on the other hand Amane doesn't have to kill Shidou, she just has to hurt him, and that could honestly be easy with a surprise and quick attack. She could incapacitate him and prevent him from giving health care to others. And this is important because Haruka is gonna try to kill himself, and he's gonna need urgent care afterwards.
And I've got a feeling some way or another we are gonna get some more people harmed in between t2 and t3.
So yeah we care about Shidou, but we care more about him being the only doctor and what that means to the others. That's why I posted this whole trial feeling like the trolley problem lol.
(there is also the argument that worries me the most that is Amane trying to convert Fuuta, but that's another post that someone else already made)
I love Amane and I honestly don't see her killing her abuser as something wrong, but she sees her murder as something supported by the cult. So I believe neither verdicts will be good for her, I feel since she got voted guilty on t1 she was doomed. But either way whether she ends up forgiven or unforgiven, I'll still be excited to see what happens next. I just don't like people missinterpreting our arguments.
So whether you are an inno or a guilty voter, don't forget to vote <3 and hope you all have a good day
24 notes · View notes
dreamaboutwhathappens · 3 months
Text
if we know that you're losing me was written over two years ago, and this album is the secret she's been keeping for two years....... i wonder if you're losing me was when the dam burst. i've seen so many people talking about how already, this album seems like the gloves are coming off in such a different way than ever before. i wonder if once she realized that he was losing her, she started to realize the harsh reality of other parts of the situation -- that protecting him was killing her.
10 notes · View notes
pinkplatiploo · 12 days
Text
I have acquired a free plain hot pink zip up so like. What am I going to do with it. Like what will I do with it. Like whatever will I
Tumblr media
#YES I WANTED TO MAKE MY OWN AND NOT PAY FOR A MABEL SWEATER FOR A LONG TIME#Also why do I always get a sweater embroidery project during the summer#this is like the third time I’d be doing this#ok whatever#I still need to plan out some logistics things about what exactly I want to do tho#like it’s not just a plain hoodie#it is a zip up that isn’t made like a basic zip up#(lowkey doesn’t make sense but I know what I mean)#so I am debating making the star a patch on the chest or putting the star on the back#I think if I do stuff by the zipper it won’t look good or I’ll mess up the zipper somehow so 🤷‍♀️#I know I said this is my third time embroidering a sweatshirt but believe me I am no expert I kinda just go with my heart and what I in my#uneducated opinion think will work#so#then there’s the star itself#I have these cotton squares I bought from a thrift store a few years ago that I can use#problem is all I have are these teddy bear ones and yellow ones#plus the squares may not be large enough for the back if I decide to do that#I can paint the fabric (and I have before) but I think it will come off over time#because I did that with the sweater I decorated last year and the paint is coming off to the point where I plan to repaint parts of it at#some point in the near future#I guess I could dye the fabric but I do not have dye on hand and I do not want to buy a lot of dye for such a small amount of fabric#I do like tie dye so I’d probably use that dye again at some point but still. you get it#pink thinks
2 notes · View notes
autistic-shaiapouf · 2 months
Text
Beginning to really wonder how much of my financial concern is manufactured and handed to me as opposed to something I'm genuinely concerned by
#bc like. i'm getting by just fine. i don't have anything to be reasonably worried about#but also when i was a kid my father would break down my mother's paycheck and basically explain how broke we were#and that May Have Affected Me Somewhat#as well as just. the way you consistently see the advice to just save! don't get takeout! necessities! and i'm not intent on living like#a monk nor am i intent on being on that grindset for financial gain#it's like i don't intrinsically care but i have so many messages given to me about how i need to care a lot and it puts me in a weird spot#i am simultaneously standing still and moving at mach speeds#i mean right now i just need a safety net while in between jobs; after that i need to save up to move out of state bc the uh#political situation and upcoming presidential election don't seem very sustainable for someone like me anymore#they weren't to begin with but i don't wanna stick around to see how bad it's gonna get#but it's like. okay and then what? save for what? going back to school i guess? idk#i feel like i keep asking myself what i'm trying to accomplish and keep trying to force myself to have answers#here and now when i have to be okay with taking things one step at a time instead of having everything here and now#it's simultaneously fine and terrible and i am holding two conflicting yet equal truths#i feel i may have a clearer head once i leave my current job. i'm trying to look but nothing feels appealing given how#burnt out i already feel. i dread going back into my workplace and i fear it's showing to the patients and i don't want that#i want a month off to rediscover who i am as a person outside of getting yelled at in retail and then pick something back up#could be feasible. genuinely could be. i need to sort out the health insurance aspect but. that's lowkey the plan?#to construct a financial safety net and then slam on the breaks for a while; see if i can strike up a deal with the staff about me#coming in for specific tasks bc we already know i'm quick and efficient with the inventory so i do have a little leverage#you know what. this is getting some of it off my chest and i'm starting to feel confident again lmao#i won't be doing weekends starting either next week or the week after so that's a start! i just think i want everything done right now#bc i'm afraid i won't have the chance again but i will. i definitely will#i just need to let myself get to that point; it's just the immense drain from the register work and the Everything that comes with retail#also having to accept that it's okay to leave this; there's not something wrong with me like. ''not being able to handle it'' or w/e#no mindfulness or detachment could've saved me; it was shit and i'm hitting the bricks and that's all there is to it#i've been thinking a lot about it all lately bc it's what's most prominent in my life rn of course#idk. pondering. introspecting. as i am wont to do#anyways if you've read all this you're a real mvp and i am kissing you on the hand#shai speaks
3 notes · View notes
the-casbah-way · 3 months
Text
very impossible to find the balance between "i want my friends to be able to talk to me about their problems and tell me when they're struggling" and "i am extremely emotionally fragile at the moment because i'm doing very badly and talking about very heavy topics especially with no warning is not something i feel capable of dealing with right now because i'm on the verge of a violent mental breakdown"
#i guess i need to find a way of telling people that i'm in that headspace in the first place#because i probably seem completely fine#but i can't tell people those things unless they explicitly invite me to do so first#so i'm assuming everyone just looks at me and goes yeah you seem fine so i can unload all this heavy stuff on you and you'll be able to cop#but unfortunately. i cannot and i feel guilty about it#but i already have way more bad days than good and when i have to hear people talking about like#very intense personal trauma and suicide and shit#it throws me off for the rest of the day and i go nonverbal until i can go straight home and sob until i fall asleep#and that is not an exaggeration it keeps happening to me with multiple different people#i don't want anyone to feel like they have to pretend around me in any way#but i also don't know how to cope with hearing intense things like this when i'm on a knife's edge mentally all the time#and i cannot afford to keep cutting my days so much shorter when i should be working#and also like when people DO talk to me about these things it's like#it's good they can get it off their chest#but now i'm holding onto all of the stuff they've just told me as well as the stuff i was already secretly holding onto about my own life#and now i have to go home alone with nowhere to put any of it because i don't have anyone to talk to#i've had people tell me this is therapeutic to talk about this stuff#but it's not for me because i'm not talking i'm just listening and then being overwhelmed and triggered and upset about it all#and most of it probably boils down to the fact that i cannot express my own feelings or tell people my boundaries#in situations this sensitive because it's so like. precarious and awkward#but i'm like i can't deal with it all the time it's too much
5 notes · View notes
glivskindel7 · 5 months
Text
Man. Im upset haha.
someone i really respected and even made a bunch of art for ended up becoming an a//ì "artist". They're an artist too so i didn't think they would be someone to do this. I talked with them and they even told me they believe what they use is "more creative" and "more ethical" than human artists.
Idk, i have no words. it is just shocking and hurts a lot man. glaze/nightshade ur work everyone.
3 notes · View notes
napsaps-archive · 1 year
Text
.
9 notes · View notes
butchviking · 5 months
Text
credit score apps are so evil theyre like trying to gamify shit that is actually important to my life leave me alone. "ooh youre sooo close to the next level youre just a few points away you could totally get to the next level if you open another credit card" i dont WANT to open another credit card but omg i could get to the next level...
2 notes · View notes
ekleipsi · 1 year
Text
--- potentially aggressive venting under the cut...
--- it’s absolutely so ridiculous that female muses don’t get the same care and consideration that male muses do. whether they’re buff bara men or breakable twinks, it’s absolutely mind blowing to me. 
--- and it’s such a weird thing to fetishize i guess, cause 90% of the time it’s just some girl behind the screen trying to live out some fantasy i guess. idk? that’s just my experience, and you know to each their own if that’s wot they want i’m not here to judge or police someone’s preferences or how they run their blog of cater their own content. 
--- i’m just frustrated because people pour their hearts into oc’s. pieces of themselves- and not self inserts, but everyone has pieces of themselves in their oc’s because it helps you connect and love them and in turn, love yourself? and it’s honestly heart breaking when those pieces of yourself are rejected, for wotever reason, but most especially if it’s because of sex/gender? especially in a “community” that preaches acceptance. 
--- literally everyone in their rules talks about “will not tolerate homophobia of any kind,” and you know? valid. despicable, honestly and as someone with gay muses, who is also on the lgbt spectrum? totally understand, but i think it’s a disgusting practice to preach something like that while not acknowledge the blatant heterophobia in this community, too. 
--- and i know this is an unpopular opinion that will probably lose me followers, but i’m so sick of keeping so quiet about this and just trying to get noticed and trying to be inclusive while constantly being shut down or turned off from something just because i’ve suggested a female muse. 
--- when i approach people for plotting and the like, i try my best to come at it with multiple muses, of all genders so that everyone feels welcomed and loved and to have people not be so...idk. idk the word. it’s frustrating and sad. 
--- as someone who has had multiple crises about my gender identity, how i present, how i act, my self esteem regarding my features and my figure? YES. i use my female muses as a means of validation, to help me cope and to help me feel like i am also worthy of love and it is okay to be different, to still be accepted, and cherished, even if i am not “normal” by many standards. i don’t really expect people to understand, but it’s just so hurtful when someone does their best and uses this platform as not only a means of creative expression, but of coping, to be met with both blatant and veiled misogyny. 
--- maybe it’s worth it to step away for a bit. maybe i’m expecting too much and putting too much effort and attention into being seen and wanted. i really admire and envy people that are just doing their own thing and going at their own pace. keep up the good work.
--- please try to be thoughtful and considerate to people and wot they’re going through not only on the screen, but behind it as well. sigh.
8 notes · View notes