#jeff green | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

nbatrades · 8 years

Text

Los Angeles Clippers and Memphis Grizzlies Swap Lance Stephenson and Jeff Green

On February 18th, 2016, the Los Angeles Clippers traded guard-forward Lance Stephenson and a 2019 first round draft pick (Matisse Thybulle) to the Memphis Grizzlies for forward Jeff Green.

The Memphis Grizzlies were always in search of a wing. The team had a trusted trio in center Marc Gasol, point guard Mike Conley and power forward Zach Randolph. But the team always seemed to lack a small forward that could space the floor, score and defend.

Looking to add talent, the Grizzlies acquired forward Jeff Green from the Boston Celtics in a three-team deal also involving the New Orleans Pelicans. The hope was that he could fill in that role as a scorer on the wing.

Green played 45 games after being traded to Memphis. He managed 13.1 PPG, 4.2 RPG, 1.8 APG, 0.6 SPG and 0.5 BPG in 30.2 MPG. Green quickly became a starter after coming off the bench initially. The Grizzlies continued to win after acquiring Green, taking 15 of the next 18 games to reach 41-14. Memphis was one of the top teams in the NBA, finishing the season with a 55-27 record.

In the 2015 playoffs, Memphis was in fifth place and battled the fourth seed Portland Trail Blazers. The Grizzlies had homecourt advantage because they had a better overall record than the Blazers (51-31).

Portland had numerous injuries going into the playoffs. Starting two guard Wesley Matthews was out for the season after rupturing his achilles tendon in early March. Trade deadline acquisition Arron Afflalo had a shoulder injury and stars LaMarcus Aldridge and Nicolas Batum had thumb and wrist ailments respectively.

The Grizzlies had an early double digit lead in the first quarter of Game One and led by as much as 29 points in a 100-86 win. Game Two saw Memphis hold the Blazers to 39% shooting in an easy 97-82 victory.

In the third contest, the Grizzlies continued to have control. Memphis led by double digits for most of the game, including 14 points late in the third quarter. Portland brought the deficit down to three points late in the fourth, but Memphis held on for a 115-109 win.

The Grizzlies took a 3-0 series lead but suffered misfortune when point guard Mike Conley had a facial fracture near his left eye in the game. He would miss the rest of the first round.

Memphis was headed to a sweep after taking a ten-point lead with 8:48 left in the fourth quarter of Game Four. Portland recovered, going on a 29-12 run to take the game 99-92 and avoid a sweep. In Game Five, the duo of Gasol and Courtney Lee combined for 46 points as Memphis won 99-93. In the five-game matchup, Green struggled, shooting 26.9% while averaging 9.2 PPG, 5.6 RPG, 1.6 APG and 0.8 BPG in 25.3 MPG.

The Grizzlies battled the number one seed Golden State Warriors in the next round. With Conley still out at the start of the series, Golden State took Game One easily 101-86. Conley returned for Game Two. He had 22 points as Memphis evened the series 1-1 with a 97-90 victory.

In Memphis, the Grizzlies got a combined 43 points and 23 rebounds from Randolph and Gasol in Game Three. They led for much of the game, winning 99-89.

Facing a 2-1 series deficit and MVP Stephen Curry struggling from the field, the Warriors regrouped, making an adjustment. Golden State had center Andrew Bogut defend guard and limited shooter Tony Allen. The move gummed up Memphis' offense, clogging the paint.

Curry had 33 points in Game Four as Golden State won in a 101-84 rout. The Warriors led by 17 points after three quarters in Game Five and held on for a 98-78 win. Curry had 32 points and 10 assists in Game Six as Golden State cruised to a 108-95 victory, eliminating the Grizzlies in six games. During the second round loss, Green managed just 8.7 PPG on 39.3% from the field, 4.0 RPG, 1.8 APG and 0.5 SPG in 28.6 MPG.

After Memphis' second round loss, the club added forward Matt Barnes in an offseason trade with the Charlotte Hornets. The Grizzlies also added center Brandan Wright as a free agent. Green had a chance to test free agency but exercised his $9.2 million player option to stay in Memphis.

The Grizzlies had a rough start to the 2015-16 season, dropping the season opener to the Cleveland Cavaliers by 30 points. Then, there was the 119-69 drubbing at the hands of the Golden State Warriors three games later.

The Grizzlies were just 3-6 after nine games but won 8 of the next 10 to rise to 11-8. Memphis hovered around .500 for much of the next month and a half before a 12-4 stretch brought the team to 31-22 at the All-Star break. Around that time, center Marc Gasol suffered a fractured right foot which would keep him out for the rest of the season.

With the 2016 offseason looming, the Grizzlies knew two key free agents in Courtney Lee and Green would be hard to re-sign. Instead of facing the prospect of losing both players, the Grizzlies dealt Lee to the Charlotte Hornets on February 16 and subsequently sent Green to the Los Angeles Clippers at the trade deadline buzzer on February 18.

Green was in and out of the Memphis starting lineup during 2015-16. The forward played in 53 games (31 starts), compiling 12.2 PPG, 4.5 RPG, 1.8 APG and 0.8 SPG in 29.1 MPG.

Green continued his routine of enticing teams with jaw-dropping athleticism and scoring ability but in the same breath frustrating them with below average three-point shooting and inconsistent play. His lack of outward passion frustrated teammates on the Grizzlies.

Memphis had a better net rating when Green was off the floor versus when he was on in both seasons. But still, Green did have his moments like a game-winner against the Phoenix Suns in December 2015.

youtube

In 98 games with the Grizzlies, Green contributed 12.6 PPG, 4.4 RPG, 1.8 APG and 0.7 SPG. In that time, the forward shot 43% from the field, 34% from the three-point line and 81% from the free-throw line.

Lance Stephenson joined the Los Angeles Clippers when he was acquired in a trade with the Charlotte Hornets for Matt Barnes and Spencer Hawes.

Stephenson was coming off a disappointing season in Charlotte. It was the first season of a brand new three-year, $27 million deal with a team option in the final year. Stephenson failed to blend in with Hornets star Kemba Walker on offense and struggled.

With the Clippers, there was hope for him to resuscitate his career as a defender who could bring extra ball-handling and toughness to the Clippers rotation. If not, the Clippers could cut bait and move on.

Stephenson's acquisition was a piece of a Clippers retool around the edges. Core pieces like Blake Griffin, DeAndre Jordan and Chris Paul remained, but the Clippers tried to shore up the supporting cast. The team signed forward Josh Smith and guard Pablo Prigioni from the Houston Rockets. It also re-signed guard Austin Rivers and agreed to deals with Paul Pierce, Wesley Johnson and Cole Aldrich.

Initially, Stephenson started at small forward for the first nine games, but his minutes eventually started to wildly fluctuate. First, he played just one minute and 42 seconds in a win against the Detroit Pistons despite the Clippers playing without starting backcourt players Chris Paul and JJ Redick.

Stephenson then received a DNP-coach's decision from head coach Doc Rivers the next game against the Golden State Warriors. He played just under 19 minutes of action as a starter against Portland the next game. That would be his last start as a Clipper.

His minutes continued to fluctuate and he largely struggled with the Clippers, registering just 4.7 PPG, 2.5 RPG, 1.4 APG and 0.7 SPG in 43 contests and 15.8 MPG before he was traded at the 2016 trade deadline. The Clippers were 35-18 when they decided to trade Stephenson.

The deal happened minutes before the trade deadline, with Memphis and the Clippers swapping Green and Stephenson. The Clippers also sent Memphis a protected first round pick.

After the trade, Green joined a Clippers team missing a star forward Blake Griffin. The All-Star was out with a partially torn left quad and a fractured hand. Green was set to help add depth to the frontcourt.

At 35-18 at the trade deadline, the Clippers went 18-11 the rest of the way to finish fourth in the West with a 53-29 record. Green appeared in 27 games (10 starts) and amassed 10.9 PPG, 3.4 RPG, 1.5 APG, 0.7 SPG and 0.9 BPG in 26.3 MPG.

Heading into the 2016 postseason, the Clippers were heavily favored in their first round matchup against the 44-38 Portland Trail Blazers. In the first game, Chris Paul had 28 points and 11 assists and Griffin had 19 points and 12 rebounds as the Clippers cruised to a 115-95 rout.

In Game Two, the Clippers bench outscored Portland's reserves 43-10 and pulled away in the fourth quarter to take a 2-0 series lead with a 102-81 victory. Neither team could make a shot from the three-point line in Game Three. Portland's duo of Damian Lillard and CJ McCollum combined for 59 points and forward Mo Harkless had two late baskets to help Portland win 96-88.

Game Four changed the entire trajectory of the series and Los Angeles' season. In the third quarter, Paul broke his right hand swiping down at a Gerald Henderson drive. Soon after, Griffin re-aggravated his left quad ending his season prematurely.

Portland pulled away in the game, outscoring the Clippers 32-20 in the fourth quarter. Portland won 98-84. In the fifth game, McCollum had 27 points and Lillard scored 16 of his 22 points as Portland pulled away late to win 108-98.

Despite missing Paul and Griffin, and facing a 3-2 deficit, the Clippers hung tough in Game Six. Portland never took a double digit lead. Late in the game, Clippers guard Jamal Crawford tied the game 103-103 after making two free-throws with 32 seconds remaining.

On the next possession, McCollum missed a runner, but Blazers center Mason Plumlee was fouled on an offensive rebound by Green and the Clippers were in the penalty. He made both free-throws. Crawford missed a floater with two seconds left and Plumlee rebounded the miss and was fouled again.

The Blazers big man split a pair of free-throws, giving Portland a 106-103 lead with two seconds left. With no timeouts left, Paul Pierce inbounded the ball to Austin Rivers who missed a desperation three as Portland held on for the win and eliminated the Clippers 4-2.

In six playoff games with the Clippers, Green mustered 10.2 PPG on 45.7% from the field, 3.2 RPG, 0.7 APG and 1.0 SPG in 26.5 MPG. In the 2016 offseason, Green became an unrestricted free agent and left the Clippers, signing a one-year, $15 million deal with the Orlando Magic.

Stephenson was given more consistent playing time upon arriving in Memphis. Injuries befell the Grizzlies as center Marc Gasol remained out and point guard Mike Conley ended up missing most of the second half of the season with an achilles issue.

The Grizzlies limped to the regular season finish line, going 11-18 after the trade deadline to finish 42-40 and seventh in the West. Stephenson appeared in 26 games with the Grizzlies, managing 14.2 PPG, 4.4 RPG, 2.8 APG and 0.7 SPG in 26.6 MPG.

Memphis was decimated with injuries heading into its 2016 playoff run. With Conley and Gasol both out, the Grizzlies went into a difficult first round matchup with the 67-15 San Antonio Spurs.

Spurs forward Kawhi Leonard had 20 points and San Antonio used a 33-14 third quarter edge to put away the Grizzlies in a 106-74 rout. Game Two was similar. Memphis shot just 32.6% from the field and 13.3% from three in a 94-68 loss.

The series location shifted to Memphis. The Grizzlies had just 10 players available, but managed to have brief moments where they led. The Grizzlies won the second and third quarters after losing the first nine of the series. In the fourth quarter, both teams traded leads before the Spurs used a 7-0 run to gain control. Memphis stayed in the game but San Antonio hung on for a 96-87 victory.

In the fourth game, Leonard had 21 points and the Spurs put the game away with a 37-21 third quarter advantage. San Antonio won the game 116-95 and swept the Grizzlies in four games. In the four-game series, Stephenson was effective, averaging 13.0 PPG on 52.3% from the field, 1.5 RPG and 1.8 APG in 23.0 MPG. Stephenson had 26 points in the final game.

youtube

The Grizzlies declined Stephenson's $9.4 million team option for the 2016-17 season so they could free up some cap space in free agency. Stephenson became an unrestricted free agent and went on to sign a contract with the New Orleans Pelicans.

The first round pick the Clippers sent to Memphis was lottery-protected in 2019 and 2020. It would become a second round pick in 2022 if it was not conveyed in either of the first two years.

The rights to the pick were traded to the Boston Celtics for the 31st and 35th picks in the 2016 NBA Draft Deyonta Davis and Rade Zagorac. In 2019, the pick was 20th overall and Celtics selected forward Matisse Thybulle. On the same day, Boston traded Thybulle to the 76ers for the 24th pick (Ty Jerome) and 33rd pick (Carsen Edwards).

Jeff Green on joining the Clippers (via LA Times):

"I am going to a great situation. Having played two years with [head coach] Doc [Rivers] and knowing what he expects from his players is big."

On the Clippers roster:

"This is definitely a team with all the right pieces and a team that is going in the right direction. The only thing I want to do is win and that’s what it’s all about right now."

Lance Stephenson looking back at his most recent struggles with the Charlotte Hornets and Los Angeles Clippers (via Memphis Commercial Appeal):

"Certain teams, you just don't fit in. I've definitely got something to prove. I just want to get back to my old self, get back to playing in a rotation and helping my teammates win. God is good, so wherever He guides me, I'm going to try my best to figure it out."

On joining the Grizzlies:

"On this team, you've just got to play hard and be in attack mode. You don't have to think too much, you've just got to play hard."

Memphis Grizzlies general manager Chris Wallace on a busy trade deadline (via Memphis Commercial Appeal):

"The job of management is to straddle the line of getting the team to win in the short term and take care of the future. When you have as many unrestricted free agents as we did, you’re not going to be able to sign all of them. The idea was to get something without these guys being able to walk away for nothing."

Los Angeles Clippers president of basketball operations and head coach Doc Rivers on the trade (via ESPN):

"I really didn't know if the trade was done because I didn't want to look at my phone."

On Lance Stephenson:

"The guy was great, and guys really liked him. I was really happy with him as far as how he carried himself."

How he gave the go ahead on the trade ahead of a funeral service for Monty Williams' wife, Ingrid (via ESPN):

"I basically told Dave, 'Yes,' and walked in. "I really didn't know if the trade was done or not, because I didn't want to look at my phone. When the service was over I looked at my phone and saw that we had pulled a trade."

Clippers guard Jamal Crawford on the addition of Green (via LA Times):

"Jeff, with his size and athleticism, the way he slashes and can guard multiple positions. It definitely helps us."

Image Credit:

Jeff Green via Getty Images/Andrew D. Bernstein

Lance Stephenson via Getty Images/Harry How

#Lance Stephenson #Jeff Green #2016 #2015*16 Season #Clippers #Grizzlies #Matisse Thybulle #2016 Trade Deadline

0 notes

grahamstoney · 9 years

Text

My Highlights Of The 2015 Melbourne International Comedy Festival

New Post has been published on https://grahamstoney.com/shows/highlights-the-2015-melbourne-international-comedy-festival

My Highlights Of The 2015 Melbourne International Comedy Festival

I totally smashed the 2015 Melbourne International Comedy Festival, going to over 30 shows during the 3 weeks I camped out in the Melbourne Central Youth Hostel, and then Nomads All Nations after the YHA kicked me out for overstaying my visa welcome.

Tickets From Some Of The Shows I Saw

I take my hat off to all the comedians who showed up and strutted their stuff for my amusement. It’s hard to rank all the shows I saw, or compare them on any sensible basis as there was so much variety and talent on show and they were almost all highly entertaining.

But nevertheless, here’s my best attempt starting with my most favourites:

Rich Hall

Measured by sheer quantity of my own laughter, Rich Hall was my highlight of the festival. I laughed so much, I lost it completely many times. At one point I thought the rather conservative-looking woman next to me was going to have a go at me for enjoying myself too much. Rich’s acerbic wit, cynicism and rapid-fire delivery made me laugh so hard that muscles in my head which I didn’t even know I had went into spasm. It was just extraordinary. And if I thought his bit about Target was hilarious, that was nothing compared to his song about Bob Dylan which was just hysterical.

Thank you, thank you, thank you Rich, you are an inspiration.

Arj Barker

Arj Barker is one of my all-time comedy heroes. Not only did I love his character Dave in the Flight Of The Conchords HBO series, I think his music video The Sickest Buddhist is hilarious, and he never fails to deliver live.

This festival I had a bonus treat when I bumped into him on the street corner outside Town Hall. I was a little star-struck and the conversation went something like this:

“Hey Arj!”, I said suddenly upon noticing my comedy idol right in front of me while crossing the street.

“Oh, Hi”, said Arj, appearing slightly startled.

“I’m Graham. I saw your show last week. Love your work.”, as I extended my hand.

“Hello Graham”, replied Arj as we shook hands.

Quick Graham, think of something intelligent to say: “I really like how you weave spiritual themes into your stand-up routine.”

“Well you’ve got to talk about something”, Arj replied.

“I’m a comedian too; but I’ve only just got into it. Where do you find your inspiration?”

“Just everyday things, you know”, my spiritual comedy leader opined.

“Like, personal experience hey”, I agreed naively.

“Yeah… At first, everything that happens to you, you’re like ‘how can I make a joke out of this’? Then after a while it gets a bit more difficult.”

“Right… like first album syndrome!”, I empathised misguidedly.

“Mmm… more like fourth or fifth album syndrome.”, he replied.

“Well great to meet you Arj!”

“Thanks Graham… nice to meet you too”

Top bloke; even remembered my name.

Dave Callan

Where to begin with this one? Well, the title A Little Less Conversation 2: A Little More Less Conversation made me laugh even before I turned up. It was an extension of Dave’s previous show titled A Little Less Conversation, where much of the talking was replaced with contemporary dancing. Not the dicky interpretive style, but the music video type. Then after explaining that there would be no silly dancing in this show, Dave Callan and four hot young dancers led us through a hilarious music video dance journey backwards through the alphabet.

The weird thing is Dave is actually remarkably flexible and despite what you’d guess from his appearance, he can dance. Beat It took on a new meaning, his pole routine was extraordinary, there was an awkwardly funny male wardrobe malfunction, and I’ll never be able to listen to Taylor Swift’s Shake It Off again without just hearing that the bakers are gonna bake, bake, bake, bake, bake.

Puddles Pity Party

I first heard about Puddles Pity Party when an excited group of people got on the tram while on my way home on night, and kept raving about what a great night they’d had at some show they’d just seen. I couldn’t help but ask “What have you been up to?”, and they replied: “Puddles Pity Party… you’ve got to go see it!”

And so I did. Puddles is called “The Sad Clown With The Golden Voice”, and rightly so. It’s hard to put into words just how entertaining he is, from the way he sings to the way he interacts with the audience; the whole thing is just magic, especially considering that he never really speaks during the whole show. I’ll never hear Dancing Queen the same way again, nor the hostile audience refrain from Am I Ever Gonna See Your Face Again? Just amazing.

Ronny Chieng

Even just the publicity photo and title of the Ronny Chieng‘s show You Don’t Know What You’re Talking About made me laugh, and that was before I’d even booked the tickets. I can just imagine him leaning back on that seat telling me off for speaking before my brain was engaged. His acerbic wit is hilarious live and he seems to have risen to prominence quite quickly; although I have a hunch it might not have seemed quite so quick to him.

Aside from his comedy, Ronny had by far the best neon sign of the festival. I also bumped into (that’s a synonym for accosted) him crossing the street in Melbourne, and said a quick “Hi”. Seemed like a decent guy who appeared to be going somewhere that didn’t involve hanging around chatting to a random stranger like me for too long.

Steen Raskopoulos

Earmarked as one of the leading emerging comedy talents of the country, I think I’ll claim Steen Raskopoulos as a friend of mine since I’ve been to several Improv classes taught by him, and I reckon by now he probably even knows my name. I saw Steen’s preview show back in Sydney when he was road-testing material for this festival, and it was a real treat to see the final work on stage in Character Assassin.

Steen really takes his audience on an emotional journey which includes involving audience members with no Improv background up on stage. He has a way of making you feel safe. I did laugh though when he said “I wouldn’t ask you to do anything that I wouldn’t do myself”. I know he’s sincere, but as a seasoned Improv guru, I’m pretty sure the scope of what he would be prepared to do himself is probably broader than most of his audience.

Nevertheless I’m sure his participants went away grateful for the experience. He also ties the various themes, characters and stories in his show together brilliantly. The whole set-up, execution and finale to the Old Man And The Ducks story was a work of art. Pure genius.

Another highlight for me was Steen and Susie Youssef’s Bus Stop Romance at the Festival Club mime night. Funny thing is, I think I’d seen it before, yet it still works. Or are they just such likable performers that it feels familiar even first time around?

Stephen K Amos

Another one of my favourite comedians is Stephen K Amos, whose voice and persona just make me laugh right from the word “go”. I got the feeling he’d only just stepped off the plane when I saw his preview show. He just hilarious though and the fun he’s clearly having on stage is infectious. I was particularly impressed with the way he handled a heckler about 40 minutes into the show, when a guy down the back yelled out:

“First one mate!”, implying that he’d only just found something funny.

Mr Amos smiled broadly and said proudly, “I know how to handle this”… and then proceeded to demolish the guy. Can’t remember what he said, but it was awesome to witness. I wish I’d videoed it… but I get the feeling Stephen really hates that.

Sammy J & Randy

Everyone’s favourite wildly successful man-puppet musical comedy duo (we’ve all been there!), An Evening With Sammy J & Randy is always entertaining, with their bizarre absurdist musical comedy storytelling.

I got laid after the last time I saw their show, so I had high hopes this year. That’s all I’ll say about that.

I passed up a unique opportunity during the Upstaging bit in their show, when Randy lept from the stage in a full-body puppet outfit and clamoured all over me in the audience in an attempt to upstage Sammy J, who was delivering a monologue from his drama studies thesis about the perils of upstaging. It suddenly occurred to me to pull Randy’s mask off, thus upstaging them both. Who is the guy playing the purple puppet anyway? Sadly, I chose to let them have their moment and watch passively instead. I’ll endeavour to be more pro-active next time.

Randy’s lip-sync battle at The Festival Club was also had me seeing double for a while. #YOUJUSTHADTOBETHERE.

Nina Conti

Nina Conti has perfected the art of externalising the monkey-mind of her inner critic for our amusement, and she does it brilliantly. Then she takes ventriloquism to a whole new level when she gets members of the audience up on stage, straps a remote-controlled mask with huge lips on them, and says “Don’t worry, I’ll do the talking for you.” All they have to do is stand there for the most part, and the result is hilarious. She either knows intuitively what they’re really thinking, or lives in a fantasy world that’s even funnier.

In one part of the show, Nina’s alter-ego monkey put her in a hypnotic trance, took control of the show and then proceeded to ask for questions from the audience. Feeling like a smart-arse, I yelled out: “What’s the meaning of life?” This led to a fun, engaging and somewhat nihilistic dialogue, which worked even better given that I was down the back of the room where Nina, being in a hypnotic trance, clearly couldn’t see where I was and had to ask which direction to point the puppet in. Surreal and hilarious. Monkey asked “Are you a seeker?” and “What do you do?”, to which I replied “I’m a comedian”. Judging by its curtly cynical and amusing answer, pursuing comedy won’t lead me to enlightenment… but I’m still willing to fail trying.

Akmal Saleh

Whenever I see a show by Akmal Saleh, I never really know what it is about. I don’t think he knows what it’s about either. But hey, the guy is funny so who’s complaining? Rockhampton, apparently.

Miles Allen

I was a late bloomer: I got into Breaking Bad late in life, when season 5 had just come out on DVD. Thanks to my local library’s phenomenal DVD collection, I had a month-long Breaking Bad festival where I barely left the house except to hunt for food, and the next instalment. It was rather heavy-going. So imagine my delight to find Miles Allen had packed all 5 seasons into a single hour of One Man Breaking Bad. This was a really fun way to revisit the show without having to spend another month, nor wind up with a crystal meth addiction. Bitches!

Sara Pascoe

What a welcome treat to have a comedian including vital lessons on evolutionary psychology, sociology and human sexuality in her act. I’ve also read Sperm Wars (or perhaps it was Sex At Dawn, which covers similar ground), and appreciated the in-depth analysis of why modern relationships don’t work as well as we expect, as much as the comedy. Apparently Sara Pascoe‘s partner is also a comedian, and they use each other in their respective routines. If that’s not symbiosis, I don’t know what is.

Kitty Flanagan

Kitty Flanagan is funny, sexy, sassy… and single? How can this be, or is it just a comedy ruse so that she can do routines about her ex-partner? Well, it was funny. I can’t help noticing that the audience was about 90% female, which improved my odds of hooking up significantly. I’d say more, but I’m afraid that she’ll see it as use the material against me in a future show.

Tom Gleeson

One of the funniest things I’ve ever seen on TV was Tom Gleeson‘s iPhone rant from Good News Week. The great thing about seeing him live is that you get the adult version, not the PG-rated one that we usually see on TV. With years of experience making people laugh, he can even make stories about his kids entertaining to other people. As he said in his act: “I nail this, every time”. Cocky, yes; but also engaging and funny.

Genevieve Fricker

What do you get when you take a musical comedienne with a strained arm and put her on-stage with a piano and a busted electric guitar? No, it’s not a joke; it was the plight of Gen Fricker the evening I saw her at the festival. An unfortunate incident helping her father move furniture (you’ll know not to do that again) had left her arm in a sling, and although the guitar issue turned out to be a problem with the speakers, she only found that out later. Ms Fricker handled the situation like a pro, using it all for comic value. Definitely one of the most likeable performers at the festival, she’s also great value when you run into her off-stage.

Jeff Green

What are you to do on a quiet Monday night at the festival, when most other comedians are recovering from their weekend hangovers? Check out Jeff Green, that’s what. What is it with UK comedians coming to Australia to steal our women though? Surely it’s not just for residency in Australia, is it?

Susie Youssef

Another recently-claimed friend of mine from Sydney, it was great to see Susie Youssef doing her own show at the festival. I’ve seen Susie do Improv before many times, but not stand-up… so what a treat!

Ray Badran

My mate Ray Badran was Dazed & Confused after pulling the PR coup of the festival with a brilliantly mis-executed audience interaction during a pre-festival show that got his name into papers as far away as the U.K. All publicity is good publicity, Ray. Nothing like a little controversy to get the word out there.

Joel Ozborn

Took a random punt on Joel Ozborn, who I’d never heard of before. He was funny, and he did it without putting anybody else down. My head was pretty much spinning by this point in the festival so I can’t recall much else about his show except that it included a little guitar, a little less keyboard, a shoe, and that it was held in the kitchen.

Luke Heggie

Luke Heggie has finely honed cynicism into an art form. If I ever have another BBQ, he’s invited. His bit about gentleman’s clubs had me falling off my seat, and although he says he isn’t special, I’m not so sure. He has a show at the Melbourne International Comedy festival, and that’s pretty special. I also chatted to him after the show and he seemed pretty cool.

Stuart Daulman

I took a punt on Stuart Daulman because the title of his show Stuart Daulman Is An Absolute Credit reminded me of the hilarious (to me, anyway) airline food reference from The Castle. I really wasn’t quite sure what was going on during most of this show, but by the end I reckon I almost got it. It’s a performance, not just a dude telling stories. I also learned how to use for dead birds for the art of seduction. I hope the beautiful Haaaaannah gets to see his show one day.

Rob Lloyd

I was stunned by Rob Lloyd‘s show Rob Lloyd vs The Monsters, based on his childhood anxieties. I was hoping for some helpful insights into my adult anxieties, which I suspect go back to my own childhood. But mainly I was just stunned. You can take that however you like. It was, nevertheless, an impressive performance piece; if you’re into that sort of thing.

The Festival Club

After realising that returning to my hostel to sleep any time before about 1 or 2 am was completely pointless given the two trams and a suburban train line right outside the window, I abandoned the idea of getting a decent nights sleep altogether and ended almost every night late at The Festival Club. Some of these nights were recorded by the ABC for Comedy Up Late, which was cool because it meant I got to relive them on iview after getting home.

Acts I remember include:

Mark Watson had my favourite line from the festival: “I would do that religiously. And by religiously I mean: without really thinking it through in detail”.

John Kearns had impressive teeth.

Kano Mami was hard to describe, but fun to watch.

Djuki Mala got their dance moves on.

Rhys Nicholson reminded me why I’m straight.

Lawrence Mooney made me laugh.

DeAnne Smith had a sweet song with helpful pick-up lines in it.

Die Roten Punkte at Haus Party were either a really silly duo of German musicians, or taking the piss.

It was nice for Mike Wilmot to be here.

So You Think You Can Mime. I think they can.

The guy who won the Lip Sync Battle with an unforgettable rendition of What A Feeling from Flashdance.

Set List

Let’s face it: we like seeing other people suffer. It’s funny, because we know the pain is happening to someone else. And comedians are funny for a living… So what could be funnier than a comedian suffering on stage? That’s the dark side of Set List. The light side is that it can inspire comic genius by assisting with the free flow of streams of consciousness as topics that the comedian has never seen before appear on the screen.

The highlight here for me was Sara Pascoe’s improvised four walls to the prison of the mind; and the guy who literally ran off-stage mid-way through the “set” after freaking out. He made me feel a lot better about myself.

Shaggers

Shaggers, the show where comics talk about sex, became a regular feature of my festival calendar after first seeing it 2 years ago on the suggestion of my mate Peter. On that night, one of the comedians went totally ballistic riffing on the audience, and it was absolutely hilarious.

This time around, most of the comics talked about how they hadn’t been laid in ages; so it was more of a show about not shagging. Desperation isn’t attractive; and maybe it was a bad omen because I totally failed to hook up with any of the cute girls in the audience that night too.

Other Randoms

A few other random highlights were:

Seeing Simon Taylor totally own a room full of screaming drunk idiots in a pub.

I’m the kind of person who sees Bob Downe in Big Top Bob.

If I wasn’t in a bad mood, Greg Fleet was probably funny.

Rebecca De Unamuno did some remarkable improvised characters.

Reliving Becky Lucas‘s bestest childhood best friendship.

59 Free Comedy inspired a pleasant tram ride to Richmond.

Outdoor Performers

I also saw plenty of outdoor performers in Federation Square and just across the road from the Town Hall. The most memorable ones were:

Mr Moriyasu: I’m still not clear if he’s actually Japanese, or taking the piss. But he’s funny, and he really does go inside that balloon. I’m hungry!

Trash Test Dummies: Who knew wheelie bins could be such fun?

Jessica Arpin nicked some girl’s boyfriend on a Swiss bicycle.

Sharon from Canada’s voice really grated on me.

Random Meetings

Another fun highlight of the festival was bumping into or seeing famous people from TV. They’re a little different in person; for one thing, you can talk back to them:

Julia Zemiro was friendly, engaging, and even helped me with my social skills.

Andrew Hansen was also really friendly and even gave me a helpful response to my silly question: “How can I get on TV?”

Lawrence Leung was busy filming something outside the town hall when I saw him, so I didn’t interrupt.

Claire Hooper looks pretty much the same in real life as she does on TV. Fancy that.

David Collins questioned my judgement for seeing Bob Downe’s show Big Top Bob, asking “What kind of person goes to see that?”, which I thought was a bit mean… so I decided not to mention him here.

0 notes