#ive been putting off the idea bc i do take care of myself. i shower every day and brush my teeth and get out of bed. and like im happy | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

moonlit-imagines · 4 years

Text

Headcanons for being Peter Parker’s Younger Sibling

Peter Parker x sibling!reader

warnings: bullying mention, blood mention

a/n: a fuckin reach, its been a WHILE since ive seen tasm

prompt: y/n is peter’s sibling

peter and you were playful kids

you were just a year and some months younger than him, so you had a harder time remembering your parents than him

but he always told you stories about them that made you miss them a little more

peter was a genius, we all know it

he was the one helping you with your homework most nights

“peter i cant do it!”

“that’s okay, y/n. look, start with two times four, that’s eight, then four times six, twenty-four, right?”

“can i say a cuss word?”

“sure”

“math is shit”

you would cry during homework a lot

you’d also pass out on his floor after talking for hours

and you’d either wake up facedown on the floor or in your room since uncle ben would pick you up and put you to bed

peter took it upon himself to take you back to your room, but he usually dragged you by the arm, sooooo

you’d play action figures together

he was batman, you were robin always

“can i be batman?”

“oldest gets to be batman so im batman”

“but i wanna be batman!”

peter walked you to your school before taking off on his skateboard

and he’d pick you up on his way home

on half-days your brother taught you how to skate

you fell a lot

aunt may had to patch you up

“how many times do i have to tell you those skateboards are dangerous?!”

peter got you your own skateboard so that you could practice without him

you would text him after you did a trick and he’d always say hell yes! show me when i get home!

being his photography assistant

really you were his assistant constantly

science fair was the most boring day of the year

“y/n, stand right here, i need to get something from my locker”

*judges walk up while youre left unattended and in a state of PANIC*

you were bullied in middle school, same as peter, he’d always stick up for you and get beat up instead

it made you very mad but it was scary, too

“how’d you get into this fight, peter?”

“oh, you know, just happened”

“peter was sticking up for me, uncle ben”

“was he now? you’re a good brother, peter”

lonely when he moved onto high school :/

but you got there soon enough

you guys were kind of loners, just ate lunch together, lugged around your skateboards, you were an artist, he was a photographer

just spectating the chaos of high school, rolling your eyes at the drama

“i have two bucks, do you want anything from the vending machine?”

“uhh, a coke?”

you saw peter get bullied by flash and lost your shitttt

you actually started a food fight after throwing mashed potatoes in his eyes

“what the hell, parker?!”

“sit down and eat your goddamn food, flash, or next time it wont be potatoes”

peter was half-proud, half-embarrassed

trying to see how long you could skate through the halls before any authority figures stopped you

sometimes......you guys got sent to the office together :)

*phone ringing* “hello, is this ben parker?”

“which one of them is it this time?”

the principal’s office was a trip sometimes

you and peter exchange your glances and wait to get scolded

“ah, the parkers, come in, lets have a chat...why do you two always feel the need to get in trouble together?”

“we just happen to get along really well for siblings”

no you fuckin dont lmaoooo

it was always something with you two

like always

*banging on peter’s door* “I KNOW YOU HAVE MY BROWNIES, PETER, GIVE THEM BACK”

*peter through a mouthful of brownies* “I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOURE TALKING ABOUT, YOURE CRAZY”

“is that my jacket?” -peter

“you mean my jacket?”

“y/n, i swear to god if you steal any more of my clothes it’s over for you”

“well, aunt may keeps giving me your clothes, so take it up with her”

and then there was just the little annoying things

“peter, can you stop clicking your pen?”

*clicks pen faster*

“you’re the worst”

and my personal favorite

“peter, open the door”

“why?”

“emergency”

*opens bedroom door* “what?”

“aunt may is making meatloaf”

“shit, uh...get your board, we’ll skate to mcdonalds and tell her we already ate”

peter and you RARELY ever brought your parents up until he found your dad’s briefcase, you didn’t have much to say

soon he was flooding his room with conspiracies and pulling you in to explain them

he began acting REALLY weird, but he was pretty open with you, he told you he went to oscorp

“YOU SNUCK IN??”

“your standards for me are way too high, y/n”

soon you started to feel not-so-good and weird things started to happen

“peter??”

“yeah? whats up?”

“this is gonna sound really weird...my hand is stuck to the door”

“it happened to you, too??”

“happening, pete. wait—this happened to you?? what is this???????”

yall done fucked up and got bit by spiders peter had so carelessly brought back into the house

it was an adjustment to say the least

and this adjustment got a whole lot harder that one night...you can remember peter just...so upset

you tried to chase him out to make sure he was okay, but uncle ben told you to stay with your aunt

maybe if you’d have been there...it would’ve been different, but when the cops got to your house you were at a loss for words

peter was covered in his blood still

“hey, hey, just breathe, okay? it’s not your fault, peter. just hop in the shower, yeah? i’ll take care of your clothes”

when peter took your advice and you were left alone, you just cried, you cried until he finally found you curled up in a ball in your room

then he cried, you just hugged each other sobbing your eyes out

peter got distant for a while, which was rough since the two of your were mourning for your uncle and dealing with these newfound powers

sooner or later he came around and helped you out, designing webshooters and a suit for you

“we match?”

*sigh* “yeah...yeah, we match”

ah yes, spider-team

you really tripped out new york at first, they thought spider-man was a teleporter

peter was still talking about your dad, but you really didn’t care, uncle ben was always going to be who raised you

you and peter would be covered in bruises after going out

“uh—peter punched me”

“y/n???!!!”

“I PANICKED”

just being dumb scared teens that cant function to save their lives until they get a little bit lucky

seriously like, every big villain you guys fought was just the worst

peter didn’t help all the time, he was good at provoking them sometimes

“hey, spider-man, you mind shutting up for a minute? for my sake?”

“sorry, sorry, just couldn’t help myself!”

he gushed to you about gwen stacy, he actually dragged you to her apartment to be patched up by her SEVERAL TIMES

yadda yadda yadda peter graduated high school! how cool is that? but he was late (what a surprise) even though you put off spidering today just for this

but he made it and you clapped the loudest for him

“thats my brotherrrr!!!”

cute family picture! (aunt may printed a bunch of them and gave them to you two and peter pinned them to his wall)

you and peter actually have a lot of pictures of the two of you just goofing off

he has one of you stuck in a trash can that cracks him up every time

seeing harry osborn again after YEARS

“wow, y/n, last time i saw you i just thought you were peter’s annoying little sibling”

“aww, it’s good to see you, too”

electrooooo

this guy really worried you bc like, bzzzz shock

you and peter weren’t equipped for that

it took a while, but you were finally able to deal with that

and several other problems

including peter’s breakup, which was a whole ordeal of its own

*peter laying upside down on your bed* “i dont know, y/n, you know? i wanna be with her so bad, i love her...but her dad is haunting me”

*you, drawing on your notepad with your legs propped up on his* “yeah, makes sense”

you actually had to tap out during the end of electro, you were hurt pretty bad

“y/n, hey? yeah, you’re okay. stay here, just stay right there, i’m gonna be back for you”

*thumbs up to show youre still alive*

but when peter came back for you there was bad news, he’d lost gwen

he ripped his mask off and fell to his knees, you could barely move but you powered through it, giving him a hug while he cried

“we...we better get home before aunt may starts to worry”

she was at work, so you two had the place to yourselves to clean up and mourn before the official news was revealed

“i should have listened to her dad, y/n, this is all my fault”

he was a mess, you couldn’t bare seeing him like this. it’s been so long since you’d seen him like this

the funeral was rough, peter was grasping onto your shoulder the whole time

he insisted that he was going to stick behind and stay with gwen for a while

“okay, i’ll see you at home...love you”

“love you too”

you gave him a hug and left him to his business, the next few months you were the only spider-person operating in new york...until rhino popped up

“im coming with you”

“you’re sure?”

“yeah, im sure”

(these are kinda ass but anyways im tagging my marvel ppl even tho ik this isnt mcu so just ignore this post if you dont care, sorry!!)

taglist: @alwaysananglophile // @rorybutnotgilmore // @locke-writes // @sweetheartliz07 // @queen-destenie // @natasha-danvers // @allthecreativeonesaretaken // @frostedgiant // @praellee // @emygirl // @lotsoffandomrecs //

#peter parker x reader #peter parker imagine #peter parker #spiderman #spiderman imagine #spiderman x reader #marvel #marvel x reader #marvel imagine #andrew garfield #amazing spider man #amazing spider man x reader #amazing spider man imagine #parker!reader #peter parker x sibling!reader #peter parker x sister!reader

529 notes · View notes

x-lipstickstain-x · 6 years

Note

hey so, i really enjoyed the imagine you wrote and i would like to request one as well, if you want to write it; ive been listening to the song lost in japan by shawn mendes and thought about andi (bc what else do i think about lately, nothing) maybe you can come up with something for that. i know this is really vague, sorry. (also i kinda hate the y/n thing, can you just pick a name, its less awkward to read) okay, thank you so much if you wanna give it a try 💜

It`s only been like 10 years since I got this request lmao. This has actually been done for quite a few days now, I`m just getting really bad at posting. So yeah this is kinda based on the song Lost in Japan by Shawn Mendes. Anyway, enjoy!

Andreas Wellinger Imagine ~ Lost in Japan

I couldn’t wait to see her in Sapporo. My best friend hadbeen working in Japan on her placement year for over six months now and Ihadn’t had an opportunity to see her since then. Ella and I have been friendssince we were kids. We grew up as neighbours and throughout all these years wemanaged to grow such a strong, unbreakable bond. So many times our friendshiphad been put to a test, but no problem matters when you realise how much you care forsomeone.

Ella was coming to the competitions in Sapporo, we had itplanned for a few months now, so both of us were extremely excited. Thecompetitions in Russia had just finished for us and until the whole team wouldhead to Japan, it was still quite a few days.

One night, I decided to finally free up the storage on myphone as the constant notifications about it being full, were driving meabsolutely insane. I went straight to my gallery and I deleted a fewscreenshots which I was sure would not longer be needed, but somehow I gotblown into a folder where I kept pictures of all Ella’s and my adventures fromquite a few years back. The smile on my face was present the whole time to thepoint where my cheeks began to hurt and my eyes started tearing up.

My soulmate was thousands of miles away and I couldn’texplain in words how much I missed the sound of her voice live, or how much Iached for her cuddles whenever I felt down. She always knew what I needed andshe tried to give her all to me even from the other side of the world, but asselfish as it sounds, it just wasn’t enough for me. So that’s when I got acrazy idea. I wanted to see her and I wasn’t willing to wait for it any longer.

I clapped my hands, smiling at my laptop screen which confirmedmy flight for tomorrow morning. I would be landing in Tokyo in the evening and Iplanned on making my way straight to the apartment she was staying in. I wasthankful that I sent her some things through the post before, so I knew herexact address. Now, I was only hoping she would be happy to see me earlier thanplanned.

I headed to my coach’s room to inform him about my earlydeparture, when I explained why, Schuster was surprisingly understanding and hetrusted me enough to continue training on my own and then join in with the teamonce they arrive.

After saying a quick goodbye to my teammates, I returned tomy room. There was nothing left for me to do besides packing and booking myselfa hotel in Tokyo, just in case Ella didn’t want me staying with her, which Ihighly doubted, but I’d rather be safe.

That night I fell asleep with a huge smile on my face.Although, it was very difficult for me to fall asleep because of how excited Iwas. I felt like a little kid. I just couldn’t get her off of my mind, nomatter how hard I tried.

The next morning I checked my phone after waking up, justlike I usually do. Seeing the daily ‘good morning Milka’ text on my phonescreen, I smiled. It never failed to put a smile on my face. I typed out aresponse, before setting my phone down and hopping out of bed. I wasn’t amorning person, but today wasn’t just a normal day, so it wasn’t as much of aneffort.

Before I knew it, I was on the plane to Tokyo. Therealisation seemed to hit me all of a sudden and I exhaled a happy sigh. Just afew more hours and I would finally get to see her beautiful smile and hold oneof the most important girls in my life. My head wandered over to thinking abouthow the dark haired girl would react to seeing me. A huge part of me was sureshe would be just as happy as I am, but a small part of me didn’t want to bedisappointed if she wasn’t.

I tilted my head from side to side, trying to crack my achingneck. Let’s just say I didn’t fall asleep in the best position, but that nolonger mattered when my taxi pulled up outside of the building Ella lived in.

I thanked the taxi driver after paying him and I got out ofthe car. I looked up at the tall building, while dragging my suitcase behindme. A million sentences were running through my head that I wanted to say toher as soon as I see her. I glanced around as I stepped into the reception,this place looked much fancier than she explained.

I smiled at the woman behind the reception counter and I justcontinued walking to the lift. I fixed my hair in the mirror, noticing howhappy I already looked just from thinking about Ella. The door opened and Ileft the lift, searching for the right door number.

I stopped walking right in front of Ella’s door. I stared atit for a few seconds before I dared myself to knock. Nothing. My heart sank alittle, why didn’t I think about this. She didn’t have to be at home, I couldbe here waiting for hours. I am such an idiot. I quietly groaned to myselfbefore knocking again.

“Oh crap… One second!” I heard the beautiful voice call outfrom inside the apartment and my heart started beating much faster. Open thegoddamn door Elle, I thought to myself, growing really impatient.

I heard the key turn from the inside and the door was quicklypulled open by my best friend with a towel on her head. She only stuck out herhead, but her jaw fell and her eyes almost popped out when she saw me. All thewords I wanted to say suddenly left my head and I was no longer capable ofspeaking.

The girl rushed over to me, squeals leaving her mouth. Herarms wrapped around my neck so tightly, I was sure she almost pulled a musclein my back. I wasn’t complaining. My arms swiftly wrapped around her waist andI picked her up, holding her as close as possible.

“You can’t just turn up to my door like this Andi!” Ellachocked out, which immediately made me pull back to look at her face. Worryrushed over me as I noticed the tears running down her face. “You don’t knowhow much I missed you. I can’t believe you’re here..” She whispered, snifflingquietly with a huge smile on her face. She pulled me back into a hug and Iclosed my eyes.

I missed this content feeling. “I missed you so much angel,”I whispered, pressing a kiss to the side of her head as I carried her throughthe door. I let her down gently and I went back for my suitcase, closing thedoor behind me. Ella was still staring at me in awe, as if she was worried itwas just her imagination and I would disappear in a second.

“What are you doing here?” She asked, strolling up to me andhugging me once again. It only just came to my attention that she was onlywearing a bathrobe.

“Interrupting your shower, apparently.” I chuckled, glancingdown at her, she laughed and playfully pinched my side. Her laugh was music tomy ears. “I couldn’t wait any longer. I had to come here to see you,” Iadmitted after a moment.

“I’m sorry, give me five minutes and we’ll talk,” Ellasmiled, still wiping at her eyes. The girl disappeared into her room and Idecided to take a look around her apartment. I instantly spotted a frame withmultiple pictures inside it, hung up on the wall above the fireplace. A cheesysmile crawled onto my face as I saw most of the pictures were ours, right fromwhen we were little, to just last year. I saw this girl growing into such abeautiful and smart woman.

I flinched at the feeling of something touching my back andshoulder, but I quickly realised it was just Ella, trying to cuddle me frombehind. A small laugh escaped my lips and I let her cuddle into my body.

“I hope I didn’t ruin any plans you had?” I sighed quietly,biting down onto my lip.

The girl looked up at me with an amused expression on herface. “You know fully well that I would cancel any plans for you… That’s if Ihad any in the first place.” She surprised me with her words, positively ofcourse.

Ella pulled away from me and she started messing with herhair, I watched her with a smile, but a part of me felt like her sudden changein behaviour had a reason behind it. I was correct.

“Andi.. Can we go for a walk?” She asked in a soft tone, hereyes pleading me to agree.

I instantly nodded my head. I’d love to see more of Tokyo andI hoped I’d get to find out what was bugging my best friend. “Of course, butare you feeling okay?” I questioned worriedly.

I received a single nod and she smiled. “I think so. We willsee.” She laughed while grabbing her purse. She took my hand and I followed herto the door without any further questions.

The majority of the walk consisted of us talking abouteverything that had happened in the past few months that she had been away for,although, we already knew everything since we talked almost everyday over thephone.

It was already dark, but in my opinion that only made thecity look even more beautiful. We eventually came to a stop at bench when thedark haired girl mentioned that she wanted to sit down for a moment. We sat incomplete silence, which was never an issue as we where both comfortable withit, but Ella kept opening her mouth and closing it like she wanted to saysomething. She nervously rubbed the palms of her hands together and I shook myhead.

“Just say what’s on your mind El.. I may not have seen youfor a while, but I can still tell when you need to get something off of yourchest,” I sighed, looking into her eyes. I could see how difficult it was forher, she looked up at the sky before squeezing her eyes shut.

“So, I was going to tell you this in Sapporo, but you’re herenow and I can’t pretend that things are the same…” She mumbled and I began to grownervous myself. “I’m sorry Andreas, but I’m in love with you,” her voice wasshaky yet somewhat stern.

My mouth fell open and stared at her, completely stunned byher words. “You what?” I eventually muttered.

She was clearly frustrated as she ran her hand roughlythrough her hair before raising to her feet at a rather quick pace, whichalmost made me jump. “Look, I was thinking a lot and I realised that how much Imissed you wasn’t normal. I miss you more than anyone, I think about you morethan anyone, I can’t live without you-,” her words were sweet, but her tonemade it seem like she was yelling the worst abuse at me so I did the firstthing that came to my mind and I would be lying if I said I have never thoughtabout doing this before. I raised to my feet, gently cupped her face into mylarge hands and I kissed her as hard as I could.

#andreas wellinger #andreas wellinger imagine #ski jumping #my writing

10 notes · View notes

uygmoeb · 2 years

Note

Ahh I know but still, it is ok to not reply right away and don't mind the extra wait (or unless my ask suddenly gets send to pluto and never returns xD) but I am happy to hear today is a better day for you! As it should be my bean, showers and specifically warm ones are the best for sure! Its why I take a little bit too long with them dhshdh oopsie.

Oohh well I'm no expert with jobs as I have yet to get one myself but I do always like to say, you happiness is important so if you do want to go back to the old one that is fine (of course easier said than done)

Jdjsjdjs oof yeah it can be like that, especially if you are new to the fandom as well and you're like a goldfish the entire time haha. I'm sure the gifts you made are amazing, I can very much understand the like, feeling of not feeling the most proud when it comes to creating something (especially of you say make gifs on photopea and not ps like myself) but it is the thought that counts! You put the time and effort and that is important! If someone has a problem with that, well slap them with a fish. They are not worth your time tbh. I do think pre-planning helps if you are in more than one! You can start with a basic idea of like to do or you like doing and then slowly build the idea as you get to know the person!

Right!? I know it is silly to think big cc on here you cannot talk to them but seeing as some of them are like, flippen taemin level but for tumblr it is a bit scary to talk with them at first xD but once you kinda get in the flow it isn't scary (I say this as I talk on anon for like all of the popular blogs lol) nice anons are more needed indeed. Its just wholesome to make someone just smile with a nice message and no I completely understand! Welcome to the club of overthinking auggie xD this is the cool kids club djjahdjs jokes aside I get that, especially if you can't help but think how it sounds like does it sound too sarcastic or may it sound a bit off? I don't mind long asks (as you can tell lol) because idk, I like to ramble and bounce off people when on the roll lol

Ok that shall be all, I hope you have a good day today! Stay warm and we are legit like 5 days away from the holidays ahhh ~moa Santa

i take like.. hour long showers some days it just happens i swear hskfdjfk but how've u been my love?? i know u finished all ur gifts so what else have u been up to? anything fun?

ah well i would go back if it didn't require taking a pay cut, losing manager status, and uh. moving 14 hours away from where i am now lmao i would move back if i thought i could do it by myself probably.. but that's not in the cards for me anymore and its ok, ive got a job here now and i think things are getting better

so my problem with making my gifts is my art program sucks so bad.. it leaves everything pixelated and messed up if im not super duper careful with it.. but it was free and ive had it since i was 12 probably?? and uhm change is difficult for me but honestly just u saying that made me feel better and i think im gonna go work on the first one to make it better if i can so wish me luck <3 i bet it also helps if u dont procrastinate too lol bc i procrastinated so hard and now here i am jdhfkdhs

yeah ! at some point i had to start being like 'they're just people too' like.. theyre not just a cc theyre a whole person whos probably really nice thats always been my problem anyway is thinking theyre like... above the average person, or even that they arent people kind of yknow??? does that make sense to u? sorta like the same thing some people do to idols i guess but also not quite?? idk its hard to explain how i think but i tried hskfhsl

i would like my one way ticket out of the overthinking club pls ive been overthinking for years my brain hurts :/ nah bc sometimes when i text ppl or anything like that im like. what tone am i giving rn are they gonna think im being an ass when im just joking or?? and thats why i love tone indicators so much now bc it makes it so so much easier for me and so many others too and ngl i actually prefer long asks like all the time. so much easier to ramble and pick up things to talk about which is something i've adored about yours from day one, i feel like its always been super easy to talk to u and i love that so so much u also always have made me feel comfy with u, like almost instantly too and i usually have to warm up at first

not u opening my eyes to the fact we're five days away from the holidays technically only four as im answering this but eh are u excited tho?? bc i can say that i am, i have so many gifts to give i'm so tired of waiting ! albeit i do need these days to finish a few lol besides the point ig

also adding this on about an hour and a half after i initially answered bc guess what!! i finished my gift for the event finally!! im actually rlly happy with how they turned out now after fixing some stuff :)

#answered #<3 —moa santa

0 notes

forgettinggirlinterrpted · 6 years

Text

Sunday 5/6

My roommates name is Shauna. She doesn’t flush and when I got here there was what I can only assume were soiled clothes in a brown paper bag.

A woman in the hall is also talking about her shit. I’m the youngest person here and im afraid to shower, there’s no door. The poop lady is cackling.

My roommate and I talked, she’s nice, and I met her night nurse and she is so nice. Her name is Maria.

I’m having a hard time figuring out why I feel like this. Its hard b/c I’ve been hungover but surely that’s not all it is. How do you recover from a hangover so bad you end up in a psych ward?

It weird not having my phone, I want to check twitter. I don’t want to go to group therapy tomorrow.

I just can’t stop crying, my eyes actually hurt.

My mouth tastes bad but I have no toothpaste.

I started reading this book called notorious nineteen and it is truly trash.

I don’t have the lights on bc Shauna’s sleeping- I feel like Mozart.

My eyes hurt, I might go call my dad again to get my moms phone number.

Ill be back.

Got Taylor’s # and called her/my mom. Maria gave me some antihistamines to try to calm me down/sleep.

My sisters want to come visit me on Tuesday.

I’ve only eaten a donut this morning.

There’s a painting of a window that is 100% mocking me.

I’m sweaty.

Some snaps I would be sending if I had my phone

*a pic of the little card that was on my bed when I came in w/ a number on it for housekeeping. Caption idea-

is this a joke?

It’s a work in progress.

*def a snap of me whipping/nay naying to the woman whose been singing in the hall all night (singer)

Shauna is snoring. There’s no joke there but its absolutely worth noting.

I just want to play candy crush.

Monday

(12:30 pmish) I feel like I’m in a dream. I’ve been sleeping all day- it turns out it was only like 3 hours tops.

I had so many dreams.

I just went and talked to a big ass table of doctors about my life and I just feel so groggy. They’re in there talking about me.

I skipped lunch b/c my tummy hurt so bad after breakfast.

Shauna puked everywhere.

I think she’s leaving.

Also turns out she’s in withdrawal AND pregnant.

And she has an infected injection site on her arm.

I just talked to my mom/dad/Taylor and asked them to bring me some books + shirts.

The nice psychiatrist said she would give me some adavan to calm me down. Also I skipped lunch b/c my stomach hurt so bad from breakfast but now I’m hungry so I guess they’re gonna order me something. I feel so weird. (might have napped here)

4ish pm

40 mg stratera (sp?), one mg atavan.

Finally left my room, I’ve been asleep all day.

Nurse went and got me a coke + a water and I saw they’re watching forgetting Sarah Marshall so I thought Id join. Everyone called me out when I came in since ive been hiding out. Bitches.

Movies suggested by the dude I’m watching FSM w/

- assassin’s creed

-Dogma

10 positive ways to describe myself

1. Legs that go up to my asshole

2. College educated

3. Big heart

4. Good sense of humor

5. Love babies

6. Love my friends

7. Good communicator

8. Love the outside

9. Big smile

10. Lovely family

9 positive coping skills

1. Talk to Taylor

2. Going on walks

3. Calling my parents

4. Reading

5. Going to therapy

6. Doing hw

7. Watching movies

8. Candy crush (questionable)

9. Eating veggies

8 things I’ve accomplished

1. College

2. Getting into grad school

3. Learning Spanish

4. Coming to the hospital

5. Making great friends

6. Moving a lot and making it through

7. Driving to SLC

8. Supporting myself (for the most part)

7 healthy things I can do each day

1. Eat well

2. Shower

3. Talk to my friends

4. Not drink

5. Clean my room

6. Clean my clothes

7. Do my hw

6 things I can change

1. My eating habits

2. Drinking

3. Exercising more

4. Getting a routine

5. Whitening my teeth

6. How I see myself

5 things I can’t change

1. How my family acts

2. How my friends act

3. The status of the US public school system

4. The amount of sunlight in my apt

5. My face

4 reasons I can’t give up

1. My family

2. I’m going to change the world

3. My friends

4. My future students

3 places I can get help

1. w/ dr. whose name I can’t remember

2. my apt (Taylor)

3. the hospital

2 people I can really trust

1. Taylor

2. my parents

1 reason I’m here

1. I need to not feel like this anymore

I’m holding myself back from asking why everyone’s here.

Assassin’s creed guy, also known as biting guy (an inside joke from earlier) and sweater girl are talking about if the food delivery guy has extensions.

We got called to dinner, now were finishing Sarah Marshall.

Biter dude told hair guy “nice hair”.

Oh my god, when peter sings about how much he hates himself, biter and white shirt turned to me and said dang sounds like he’s going to be in the room next o me! way to be self aware guys!

Just called my dad to find out about my stuff getting dropped off but turns out he did 2 hours ago and its all been in my room.

I started crying immediately b/c Taylor is amazing- she brought me the perfect books. It was like she was talking to me through the books.

She gave me b Franks autobiography and Jesse Donaldson’s ‘on homesickness’. And the book Amanda gave me. also wuthering heights and pastures of heaven. All so perfect.

Shirts is roasting the shit out of double lasagna (he ate… double the lasagna we all got for dinner).

He keeps saying he looks like he’s about to give birth

“I mean were already in the hospital we just gotta figure out what floor is maternity”

Wuthering Heights

1801- Mr. Lockwood +Heathcliff

Thrushcross Grange

Double lasagna is talking about the last time he had tequila- brother the last time I drank it I ended up here.

What an anecdote.

“they could have stolen my jewelry or even my virginity!” – about the guys who helped when he got too drunk. Double lasagna’s real name is * but he just introduced himself as Dorothy (to hair the night nurse helper).

Fake Abby (biting guy came to my room thinking I was her) is here and shirt just said “you’re awfully quiet” and she rejected him hard. It was awk.

One of the helpers is just chillin in here w/ us while I read my shitty book and we watch “just go w/ it” – its so bad.

One of the nurses (pony tail) just made me go on a walk down the hall w/ him. They all keep asking me how I’m feeling and I keep saying fine but I’m not. As long as I don’t talk I don’t cry. I’m starting to think I want to stay here longer but also leave right away. Its all so confusing.

Double lasagna just asked hair nurse if he could have his phone out of his bag and the way just looked up from his phone and said “nuh uh” was iconic.

Its 805 pm and I think I’m going see about getting my sleeping pills so I can just crash.

I need to document stuff better tomorrow b/c I don’t like how much of a blur today is.

I finally showered and I feel better I think. I just don’t know what the move is once I get out. Like I don't know how to talk to anyone.

I need Taylor to contact Morgan I think.

I’m sure she’s confused. Or maybe she doesn't care literally at all. Who cares. I’ve been surprised at how easily I’ve been sleeping today especially without my phone and with everything on my mind.

I need a talk therapist like yesterday.

I can’t bring myself to get through any of the books Taylor brought. The 19 book in such trash but it’s easy to read.

The shower needs to be pressed every 45 seconds to say on. I wore shower shoes.

Fake Abby doesn’t know what the move is, I can tell.

I called Taylor + my mom then got snack in my night meds. I mom told me to call back to talk to Mack so I just did. She’s lovely.

Double lasagna somehow talked to snack nurse into giving him a full sandwich. I got a strawberry poptart and a coke.

They’re checking in a new girl now who looks a bit like she’s closer to my age.

I’m happy she’s not my roommate.

I think tomorrow ill try to call family/friends less and trust the process. I need to really take a step back.

I’m just happy I feel comfortable sitting in the sun room. I knew a lot more about movies than they did

Goals for tomorrow-

Check out group

Find rec room/sign my name by Mack’s

Document everything

Keep room clean

They still haven’t cleaned Shauna’s side. Its off putting.

Have I mentioned they check on me every 15 minutes?

Its off putting also.

I wish I had just like some mascara or something. I hate to be that girl but damn.

My mom keeps trying to talk about the funny aspects of this but I can’t say I’m feeling them yet. Today just really was such a blur. I sept a lot then talked to therapists then I think went back to sleep? Then begged for lunch then I think slept? That’s where its fuzzy. Called my fam too much, I need to not tomorrow.

I also want to gain control of tv room tomorrow. Power move!!

Did I mention I called Chelsea? My brain is mush.

- Be more present tomorrow-

- Ask more questions-

be warned: new beginnings are rarely pure, and neither are the men who seek them

On Homesickness pg 23

Scott County

We are homesick most for the places we have never {truly} known

37, Franklin County

Questions to Proteus -> how do I get home? 45, Montgomery County

Tuesday

7:10 am

slept super hard but also had super vivid dreams. Mack and I talked about that last night.

She said she had never brought it up. I was a little restless, prob just bc they were constantly opening my door and eventually just stopped closing it.

I’m just trying to let go of control. I don’t want my phone back. I need to talk to someone about the insane anxiety I feel when I think about home back to the real world.

Even just being in my apartment scares me b/c it feels like its full of negative energy. I need to focus on the good when I get out.

I keep thinking about my phone bill and I can’t remember if I paid for internet. Also the maintenance light is still on in my car.

Even though mom and dad are coming today I need to be communicating less w/ outside world. If I really want to be off the grid I need to really b alone with me thoughts and be okay with it.

I kept feeling for my phone throughout the night.

I wonder what the nurses think of me. do I seem different than everyone else?

I keep finding myself trying to relate to the nurses, esp. the young male one (hair) but what am I trying to prove? That I’m not like everyone here?

Newsflash, asshole, I am

(I’m the asshole)

I need a sharper pencil- do you think a lobotomy joke will be appropriate when I request one orr?

I wonder if Prather has texted me. I’m supposed to sub on the 21st.

Yikes

Not looking forward to checking my bank account. I really spent a lot w/out giving a shit. It was freeing but I also haven’t worked in over a week + a half soooooo.

On homesickness is so dramatic but I love it. Makes me think of Taylor. (bc home, not the drama)

Also I think I’m getting fucking sick. Or, according to Lula (Flula) in 19, I’m getting hospital cooties.

7:27 am

I’m in TV room w/ singer. I asked what we’re watching and she said “some kind of cartoon”. She’s not screaming which is awesome. I’m going to read Wuthering Heights.

Almost 8

Called dad and asked him to bring me a pair of readers since my eyes hurt. Nice nurse #2 is here again. She’s blonde. I haven’t seen Maria again. Met another nurse too. She was young. Also there’s a fake nurse (fake nurses are in teal, like hair, and he real ones are in blue) who I def. know. Cant figure out from where, maybe high school? Either way, not cool with it. Also, they sharpened my pencil.

TIME TBD

Having a hard time focusing on reading. My eyes hut.

I don’t like waiting around.

Is it petty to point out inconsistencies in the rules? There’s different info on different sheets in the packet they gave us. Makes me wonder how closely these patients are reading it. Its all petty though, like whether or not we should take 5 or 10 minutes to use the phone or how many visitors we can have at a time.

I know myself too well, ill be bringing it up. I’m going to check on breakfast.

8:30ish

breakfast was sub par. Sat alone. New girl, sat w/ double lasagna. She only wanted milk so homeboy asked if he could eat hers! Has he learned nothing?? I ate pretty quick; I think I need to go back to sleep. I feel weird.

Time-?

Dr.?? (nice psychiatrist) came in and we talked. Started fine but I got really upset b/c of how much I feel like garbage and I don’t now if I want to be here. But also I don’t want to go back to the real world. She left and I went to go get a visteral 25 mg b/c I’m so upset. They gave it to me and when I got back to my room I 100% had a panic attack.

I felt like I was a kid again. Maybe its b/c I’m here but I’ve never been sure that what it was until now. They happened a lot as a kid and usually ended in my mom holding me and saying everything’s ok. Its so hard not having that now. I left my room and the med student from Sunday was in the hall and he came and talked to me until I calmed down.

With talking to them I finally feel like I’ve been able to verbalize how anxious I feel here along with how I feel about leaving. I just need to rest my eyes for right now, but when I’m up I need to write down what Dr. B said about when I get out.

I miss my parents.

Time unknown

Honestly can’t remember what happened next.

Social worker came in, she’s lovely. Talked a bit then I kept resting.

She gave me some info on how to stay grounded during a panic attack.

Then I think I went to the rec room to do a puzzle but then religion group started. I stuck around but then little dr came to get me and asked if I would meet with big table of doctors even though I hate it.

I did it but it made me upset again. They said they would come talk to me but they haven’t.

I fell asleep again then not Maria nurse came to tell me they’re gonna give me more adavan once my visteral wears off. Fell back asleep then got a drink/ate lunch.

My puzzle got hijacked so I brought a new one into my room. I hit a wall so I stopped to write all this down and go find out what they talked about it my meeting.

I think its around 1 pm.

2pm

Sat and watched how I met your mother for a little. Started crying. Asked a nurse when I was gonna get talked to when little doc came up. they gave me an adavan and now I’m waiting for him to come talk to me. the maid is making up Shauna’s old bed while I sit and cry. Very awk.

I don’t know why I keep crying. I just feel like I’m going to keep having these attacks. I feel so hopeless.

Still sitting here crying. Still no doctor.

My name is Abigail and I am safe. I am in the present and I am safe.

~505

lil doc came to talk to me and I got upset. I don’t understand what my next move is.

Just slept pretty hard until now then got dinner. Going back to sleep is very tempting.

I think I’m allowed another pill. What’s the point?

6:50 pm

I honestly don’t know what I’ve been doing since after dinner. I’ve been doing the puzzle in the TV room. I’ve been watching the office. I asked nice nurse if I could have another pill but she’s pretty sure she cane until its time for bed. My anxiety is pretty high right now my parents will be here in like an hour.

7 pm

officially been hoarding pencils. They say I can have an atavan at 10 pm for bed, but they gave me a V. im wondering if that’s going to help me sleep. They’re going to put me on abilify on top of my startera. I’m hoping they’ll give me some of this visteril to take home in case I start to freak.

Decided that in order to help me not get stressed I want someone to take my phone and ask me one by one about who texted/called/emailed and help me deal with it. Same w/ my bank statement.

I want to say I feel better, but I don’t know. Its just all a blur.

I want to see m parents so I can find out what the move is when I get out. Maybe a meeting with Andrea and social working and one of them would be cool.

I don’t want to get out after Taylor leaves. Fuck.

Double lasagna and biter left.

* is still here, and fake Abby is MIA.

New girl who I don’t know

New guy Brandon- wears vans

And tad who Mack warned me about. Apparently he called 911 on the nurses from the phones.

Bold move.

Fake Abby and I are friends. I think she’s lonely, I know she wants to be my roommate, but I can’t deal with that.

Now I just kill time until mom gets here.

930 ish?

Mom and dad came and I feel a bit better. Mom and I did our crossword puzzle and dad and I figured out grad school. I also had him assure me I don’t need to worry about $ right now.

I asked for a pen but they said no. but I STOLE ONE FROM MY DAD!!

Honestly its low on ink but just having it feels great.

Just called my mom and said goodnight to Mack. I feel ok. Mostly just shook b/c of how much of a dream this all feels like. But I’m ok. Time to crossword and eat my poptart like the star patient I am. And I’m gonna do it in god damn pen!

Goals for tomorrow-

- track when all meds taken

- get better at checking time

8am

slept like shit. But I think I might go home today?! I’m sick so my head fucking hurts. I dontknow what to think. I just want to sleep in my own bed.

11am

talked to dr. B + some of the team and I think I’ll just stay another night. It was hard for me to think of what I wanted to b/c I just woke up. but she made a good point that if I’m sick and drowsy it could be good to stay since they’ll change the time I get the abilify. I don’t know. Just very tired.

1109

Watching fresh prince. Thought there was gonna be group in here, but so far nothing. Fuck this.

Fake Abby told shirt he looks like Carlton and no shit he kind of does. He deadass did the dance while he was walking out. He thinks side burns were cool. Now singer is singing Elvis songs.

Newer girl is even scarier she’s very touchy. Seems like she doesn’t listen.

singer is standing directly in front of the tv. She threatened to fire the nurse that told her to stop.

Shirt is leaving today.

New girl just came in and snatched the stuff out of singer’s hands and then tried to talk to everyone. Now singer is out for blood. New girl is wild.

1140

going to lay in bed until lunch.

~12

slept a little until lunch. Hamburger and a coke.

I’m def staying another night. Thinking of some ideas for pickup since I need someone to go back to my apt w/ me.

I think that’s the move. And then if its horrible I can try to stay somewhere else. I’m thinking of asking my sisters. Idk. Might call some of them now.

I’m really just waiting to get something for my cough.

215

just slept super hard

even denied taking my cough meds so I could sleep more

I finally got into the rec room and unsurprisingly it was a disappointment.

Couldn’t find macks mark so I left.

Gonna go try to get more crossword

255

just called Chelsea, she said she would try to come over after work/talk to liv about doing the same. I just want to take a real shower.

Crazy Tad just said hi to me.

New girl (maid) is asleep sitting up, we’re watching that 70’s show.

My shirt smells like Keenan.

Also its almost snack!

Hmmmmm 4?

took a shower after smashing a poptart. The sheets they gave me to use as a bathmat smells like actual piss and shit- maybe I shouldn’t have wrapped myself in it.

A little before 5

Slept again. Got woken up for dinner. It was ok. God I’m so fucking tired.

I’m glad I’m writing everything down b/c its all such a blur.

Cant remember if I already wrong down that I talked to chels. I want help meal prepping and doing some laundry. Also someone to sleep over. I want my own bed, but I don’t want to be alone. I don’t want my phone. I don’t know what good anyone can do me right now until my meds get figured out. I don’t know!!

I met my new nurse, DD, who said I’m taking my abilify in an hour. Then I want my sleeping pills so I can konk out, ugh.

Time to lay down. Again.

I think I fell asleep again?

Went to get my abilify around 615. Panic attack happened again.

I can’t stop crying and I don’t want to be here anymore w/out talking to someone about all my regrets.

I think more than anything I’m really disappointed with how this whole thing is going down.

Just want to stop crying.

830 pm

calmed down. Kind of okay w/ leaving but also so anxious.

844

Singer has 12 different personalities.

About to go ask for my meds/follow up on what’s up w/ the nurse’s research

9ish

Ate a poptart. Nurse was doing meds so she hasn’t looked into anything. Took 2 hydroxizines (50 mg) + a 3 mg melatonin. Called dad, still not a grad student. Very frustrating. Everything sucks but its ok bc I am Abigail Nash and I am safe in the present. I am not in the past. The present. And there are people that love me.

Thursday

- if… because then

- one day at a time

9 am?

Had breakfast, found out I’m going home today.

Called mom + dad, and mom is gonna pick me up around 5

2 more free meals!

Getting a therapist is going to take a minute but I feel ok about it

Nurse Nadine is so sweet.

These people are getting the wildest thank you cards later.

930

I’m going to get a watch

I don’t like not always knowing the time

That fucking short haired nurse came in again and gave me shit for being in my room

Don’t know her name

But I don’t want to

I’m getting out here short haired lady! And I’m pulling out to win!

I’m getting sleepy, fuck

I have like 8 hours to kill

Soooo

Suddenly now that I know I’m getting out I feel like some kind of bubble has been burst and I feel semi normal

Am I really the Angelina Jolie of this place? Not actually Angelina, but her character from Girl Interrupted?

She’s hot in that too, though.

Final thoughts for now- RIP Brittany Murphy.

925

group- only going because nurse Nadine is leading it.

Tad gave a very sweet little speech about his dad

Grabby girl wouldn’t share, she it nuts

But now miss congeniality is on!!

1055

cute rec therapist let me into the rec room. I wrote

SCABZ

In big letters on the table, and made a picture frame. Also played ping pong with grabby. I’m not even going to go into how that went.

Update: grabby thinks I’m her mom

My best gift:

The gift of travel. Travel in the sense of moving, traveling to see a friend, or a friend traveling to see me. travel has allowed me to maintain friendships w/ people I usually wouldn’t. Another gift coming from travel is my best friend, Taylor who traveled to another state for school, where I met her. And the gift of going to visit my best friend in France a few years ago who I’ve known since I was 9.

~~~~ when the party is at it’s best, it’s time to leave the party ~~~~

- Tad’s ex-father-in-law

almost noon

Tad (ok turns out its not the Tad Mack was talking about) said some really good stuff in group and when he was talking about finding balance I said, “like the yin for your yang?” and he did not know what I was really talking about but it fit into the convo really well. So I started to draw him one and when it was over I gave it to him and he was really touched. I feel really good about it. It sucks I’m just now getting to go to group but I think my meds might be working b/c I haven’t gone back to sleep yet.

Also, they said I could keep 19!

I need to get some books together to donate. And some puzzles.

After lunch

Pulled pork. Singer change the channel on TV to cartoons. I see a nap in my future. Also brushing my teeth.

There’s a new kid, he’s gotta be newly 18 b/c he looks young.

Tried playing monopoly w/ Tad, maid, and new guy, but it devolved.

Thought he was cute but he might be nuts (shocker)

I said he was welcome to my books and he looks a mans search for meaning and I’m about to leave so I don’t think im getting it back.

Amanda wrote a nice note in it. That sucks. I gotta stop being so nice.

I asked them to give me a visterile and they did. I should be ready to rock when mom gets here.

430

did more painting- made a weird sign for door knobs. No sign of homeboy + my book. I kind of don’t want to leave, but I refuse to let myself have fomo in a place like this. Idk what the move is for my book. He better be reading it. I don’t want to leave before dinner so he can at least have a chance to say something to me about it.

Tad is really fun to hang out w/. he is really nice. We talked about grounding during panic attacks and he invited me to play monopoly and we talked about how it sucks that we all just started talking to each other but that’s also prob just a sign that the meds are working.

I saw he put my yin yang in the front of his journal. Very sweet.

This isn’t to say he isn’t totally nuts. Also, young guy said my voice reminded me of “stuff” what the fuck.

Grabber called me mom and tried to give me her hand.

2 notes · View notes

sadrien · 7 years

Text

wanna chat? pt.19

on ao3 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19

so this is like...twice as long as a normal chapter. anyway i was in les mis the other week and i sent something and someone thought it was a les mis chapter of wanna chat. and @reyxa encouraged it so Here We Are

this chapter continues right off of the last one because i found a note with sick quotes on it. i kept the les mis as light and understandable as possible but just like..let me know if it makes 0 sense. i had to get this out of my system because ive been in a writing funk

(mari = cough cough, nino = space bro, alya = alys, adrien = glen coco)

enjoy?

3:12 in boo you whore

cough cough: gmoring i cant brethe out of mynose rn Im not goin g ot be in school today :( Bu ti cant sleep anymore because I cnat breath e iim gonna go watch youtube videos

6:37

space bro: my dude i hope youre feeling better when you wake up

6:43

glen coco: If you’re not turn on the shower really hot and sit in the bathroom with the steam

alys: or drown urself in cold medicine

glen coco: Don’t do that

space bro: never listen to alya

alys: dont listen to these traitors

PM between glen coco and cough cough

glen coco: I bet the akuma attack last night really didn’t help Don’t worry about anything today I can handle it unless it’s another akuma Just get some rest <3

10:03 in boo you whore

cough cough: Self care is chugging five cups of tea and astral projecting behind a mcdonalds to punch hawkmoth in the face

11:46

glen coco: Mari no

alys: mari yes

space bro: mari wtf

cough cough: Im dyin g

alys: tag urself im punching hm in the face

space bro: im astral projection

glen coco: Five c ups of tea

cough cough: Does that make me the mcdonalds

space bro: congrats mari

glen coco: I can’t believe Mari is the golden arches

alys has changed their name to punching hawkmoth in the face

punching hawkmoth in the face: im finally my True Self gang follwo suit

cough cough: Why shoul d I LISten to you

punching hawkmoth in the face: bc u love me and want me 2 b happy and also bc i still have ur jacket in my bedroom

cough cough: Fuck

cough cough has changed their name to mcdonalds

space bros: al youre ridic

punching hawkmoth in the face: just do it babe

space bros has changed their name to astral projection

astral projection: there ya go

glen coco: Rip Glen Coco

punching hawkmoth in the face: truly a her o of his generation :’(

mcdonalds: RIp

glen coco has changed their name to five cups of tea

five cups of tea: Rebirth

mcdonalds: I hate you all img oing ot bed

punching hawkmoth in the face: goodnight my darlign <3

astral projection: nap well bro hopefully you feel better when you wake up

15:37

punching hawkmoth in the face: remind me to throw my bag in the seine i dont wanna do hw :(

astral projection: i feel you

punching hawkmoth in the face: wanna get togheter and do hw

astral projection: do homework or “do homework”

punching hawkmoth in the face: have u ever met me “””””””do homework”””””””

astral projection: i need to figure out physics my dude

punching hawkmoth in the face: D’:

five cups of tea: I can help you when I get home tonight

punching hawkmoth in the face: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

astral projection: the real mvp i love you

five cups of tea: I love you too Have fun Use protection

astral projection: alya please kick him out of the chat

punching hawkmoth in the face: no i like him

astral projection: fuck

18:57 mcdonalds: Screens hurt my head irhgt now Im gonna watch reruns and keep sleepng

punching hawkmoth in the face: feel better babe <3

22:15

five cups of tea: Ok so the other day instead of doing homework I started reading les mis ANd now instead of doing homework I’m reading les mis again I can’t believe this is how I’m procrastinating

astral projection: what

punching hawkmoth in the face: the musical????

five cups of tea: No the book Which the musical is based off of

astral projection: what a nerd

punching hawkmoth in the face: lmao how is it

five cups of tea: Old Long

punching hawkmoth in the face: how long?

five cups of tea: Uhhh 655,000 words

mcdonalds: jesus

astral projection: what the actual fuck

punching hawkmoth in the face: holllllly fuck

astral projection: you my dude are unreal

punching hawkmoth in the face: for fun???? r u sure this is for fun???????

five cups of tea: I think so? It’s kind of boring sometimes and hard to get through but other parts are really good Also if I’m reading I don’t have to practice chinese

punching hawkmoth in the face: touche

astral projection: have fun reading bro you are unbelievable

PM between five cups of tea and mcdonalds

five cups of tea: Hey why are you up? I thought you were heading off to bed a while ago?

mcdonalds: I didnt take nyquil tonight because I felt a little better and didnt want to pass the fuck out again but now Im awake and cant sleep because my head feels like its gonna explode And I regret So much

five cups of tea: Aw no poor bug

mcdonalds: Ugh

five cups of tea: Do you want anything?

mcdonalds: You dont have to

five cups of tea: Do you want anything? If you want soup I can get you some

mcdonalds: Its like???? Really late?????

five cups of tea: Mar its only 20:30

mcdonalds: Oh It feels like 1 But its still late

five cups of tea: Ok well Late night food is not a new thing Trust me

mcdonalds: … If you brought me soup Id love you forever

five cups of tea: I thought you already did

mcdonalds: Id love you even more

five cups of tea: I’ll be on my way soon

mcdonalds: I love you so much <3

23:35 in boo you whore

punching hawkmoth in the face: what if you took tea in shots like shot glasses

five cups of tea: Like with hot tea?

astral projection: i feel like thats a good way to burn your entire mouth

five cups of tea: *entire life

astral projection: ^^^

punching hawkmoth in the face: hmmm

five cups of tea: Alya no

astral projection: yeah bad idea

punching hawkmoth in the face: f i n e

1:02

mcdonalds: sos Im dying I constantly feel like Im about to sneeze If I dont feel that way its cause Im sneezing

astral projection: rip my dude guessing you cnat sleep while sneezing

mcdonalds: Nope :’( End my suffering please

astral projection: no can do i can offer virtual hugs

mcdonalds: I guess thatll work for now

astral projection: <3

2:03

PM between five cups of tea and mcdonalds

five cups of tea: Hey Hey Marinette Hey I have something to show you

mcdonalds: Adrien its 2 in the morning

five cups of tea: So? You’re up too

mcdonalds: I slept all day

mcdonalds: Yeah but you’re awake right now

mcdonalds: … Fine Hit me

five cups of tea: “When they had finished, when they had told each other everything, she laid her head on his shoulder and asked him: ‘What is your name?’” Us

mcdonalds: Oh my go d This is les mis right??? What youw ere talking about before??

five cups of tea: Yup

mcdonalds: Omg Why are you like this

five cups of tea: Ok but am I wrong????

mcdonalds: I cant say you are tbh

five cups of tea: Man I feel like Marius am I like Marius??

mcdonalds: Whats he like?

five cups of tea: Kind of oblivious, pretty romantic but sort of in a weird way, awkward, usually confused but can be scary if he needs to, handsome as hell and love of my life that I would honestly leave all three of you for

mcdonalds: Wow Are you sure you havent already

five cups of tea: :P Actually….

mcdonalds: Are you suddenly realizing youve left us for a fictional character

five cups of tea: No I was oging to say I might be more like Bossuet

mcdonalds: Youre just saying words I dont know who that is

five cups of tea: He always has bad luck Like always Ummmm hold on

mcdonalds: K Who would I be???

five cups of tea: “He was the constant victim of mischance, hence his merriment. He said, ‘I spend my life walking under ladders.’”

mcdonalds: Ok you mgiht be this Bossuet you bad luck magnet

five cups of tea: For you Hmmmm Enjolras?

mcdonalds: Not cosette?? Shes the love interest right

five cups of tea: As much as I love you Enjolras is the leader in red And I just can’t help myself

mcdonalds: Nerd Are you goind to do alya and nino too?

five cups of tea: D u h

2:34

mcdonalds: Adrien?? You ok? Youve been quiet for a while Or did you fall asleep on your computer again

five cups of tea: No I’m here I’m just Stuck This is haarrrrrdddddddddd Alya and Nino are just so deep and complex and awesome and I dont’ know how to place them???

mcdonalds: True But wow Slightly offended

five cups of tea: Hey yours is based on a pun I can pun easy

mcdonalds: G o to sleep kitten You can sort them in the mornign Later this morning

five cups of tea: Fine I hope you’re feeling better

mcdonalds: A little bit!! The soup definitely helped Night <3

five cups of tea: Night <3

10:25 in boo you whore

astral projection: saturdays are chill but my mom wants us to clean the entire apartment today and im not about that life

12:12

mcdonalds has changed their name to enjolras

enjolras: I have no idea who thi s is but I hope it makes Adrien happy

punching hawkmoth in the face: ???? wahts ahppenign

enjolras: Adrien said I was this charactera t like 2

astral projection: why the fuck do none of you people value sleep

punching hawkmoth in the face: how theh ell did that even come up in conversation

enjolras: He was saying he thinks hes like Marius

astral projection: huh

five cups of tea: I’m not sure yet

astral projection: bro!!!

five cups of tea: I'm thinking either Marius or bossuet for myself

punching hawkmoth in the face: r we supposed 2 know the second one

enjolras: Hes got bad luck Thats what I got from our convo when no one else was awake

punching hawkmoth in the face: change ur name i want u2b the hopeless romantic

astral projection: isnt he already??

punching hawkmoth in the face: lmao

five cups of tea has changed their name to marius

punching hawkmoth in the face: awesome were u gonna do nino and i??

marius: Yeah I’m just having some trouble

astral projection: yeah were just too unique to be put into little boxes

marius: Exactly

astral projection: that was sarcasm but i love you so much

marius: <3

punching hawkmoth in the face: hey question not that im doubting maris badassary but why enjolras

marius: Enjolras is incredibly passionate and would do anything for his friends and the people of Paris Reminds me of how Marinette is as class president

PM between marius and enjolras

enjolras: Nice save

marius: Thanks

in boo you whore

astral projection: I see it

marius: Alya could be eponine?

punching hawkmoth in the face: shes the one who cries about marius right

marius: Well I was actually thinking her cause Ponine she knows her way around And all that stuff But yes she cries about Marius she does have a song about that

PM between punching hawkmoth in the face and astral projection

punching hawkmoth in the face: lmao did he just give me the character hopelessly in love with marius

astral projection: rip

punching hawkmoth in the face: end my life

in boo you whore

punching hawkmoth in the face: i cna work with that

punching hawkmoth in the face has changed their nickname to eponine

astral projection: and then tehre was one

marius: I’m struggling

enjolras: Arent we all

eponine: Id help but I know literally nothing other than some of the lyrics RED THE BLOOD OF BLOOD BLOOD BLOOD

astral projection: theres no way that isnt right im 100% sure those are the actual words

eponine: BLACK THE BLOOD OF BLOOD BLOOD BLOOD

enjolras: Period mood

eponine: general mood

enjolras: Ok same

eponine: mood: red and black but the only words are blood

enjolras renamed this conversation to “red the blood of blood blood blood”

eponine: yes exactly

astral projection: sometimes i wonder why im friends with you

eponine: because u love us and would be sad without us

astral projection: ok yes but also why

marius: I mean maybe Grantaire? He’s a jack of all trades? Nino you are…really hard to place But R might be the best bet

enjolras: Wait a minute R?

marius: Yes

enjolras: Get out of this chat

marius: </3

astral projection: that is amazing

astral projection has changed their nickname to grantaire

grantaire: in it for the puns

marius: So is Hugo

enjolras: Who

marius: The writer of les mis

eponine: tag yourself im les miserables all of them

grantaire: you cant be all the miserables

eponine: watch me try

marius: Sorry you must have no idea what’s going on

grantaire: not really we have nothing to contribute but keep going dude!!! i love to hear you ramble

eponine: oh oh i have something to contribute

enjolras: You do?

eponine: 24601? more like 246 so done with your shit

enjolras: Im leaving the country

grantaire: whos shit?

eponine: uh oh fuck whos the antagonist again

marius: Society

grantaire: deep

enjolras: Stop being fake deep

eponine: feep anyway no u butt the police dude

marius: The only evil in les mis IS society And the Thenardiers OH JAVERT

eponine: YES THANK YOU

marius: Javert: do not forget my name Alya: forgets his name

eponine: fuck you also 246 so done with your shit javert

grantaire: thank you for clarifying

eponine: no prob

enjolras: Ok so Im googling stuff to try and figure out whats happening And wow This is depressing ¾ of us die

marius has changed their nickname to bossuet

bossuet: Now all of us die

eponine: nope change back 2 lover boy ur not dying too

grantaire: um no one is dying my dudes

bossuet: We’re always dying But fine

bossuet has changed their nickname to marius

enjolras: Im pretty sure Im dying righ tnow I almost coughed up a lung

eponine: GO TAKE MEDICIN E

enjolras: You arent my mom!!!!!!!!!

eponine: THAT DOESNT MEAN I DONT CCARE ABOUT YOU AND YOUR HEALTH!!!!!!!!!

enjolras: AHHHHH

eponine: AHHHHHH

grantaire: Ahhhhh?

marius: Ahhhhh

#wanna chat #adrien agreste #marinette dupain cheng #nino lahiffe #alya cesaire #my fics #hi this is awful

83 notes · View notes

sloblesbian · 7 years

Text

so last february when my parents were moving out of their apartment in pawtucket into the house they rent now, i went over to help move some stuff and check out the new house. while we were still in the apartment (which i loved... it was a really beautiful loft), i grabbed a hair elastic from my mom’s room, because my hair was just barely long enough to put up, and i had been using those tiny plastic elastics they sell in a little container of like, 500, + many many bobby pins, and a headband. i didn’t have any hair elastics of my own. anyway it was exciting for it to be finally long enough to put up, i kept the elastic, and every day, except for 2 days in january this year where i couldn’t find it (it was, for some reason, inside of a sock on my floor), i have used it to put my hair up, which is how i mostly wear it, bc i don’t know how to part it in a flattering way, and i don’t like when it touches my face. when i have my hair down, i wear it on my wrist. i have not used another hair elastic since. it’s very stretched out & today i finally bought some of my own. it occurs to me that i could do the same thing, pretty much, and have these elastics last me for the next two decades of my life, probably.

i’m somewhat aware that i’ve been pretty steadfast in terms of personality, tho i like to believe i’ve mellowed out and just, in general, gotten better at being myself, but i have difficulty remembering who i was in the past. i can remember very specific events but in general it’s fuzzy. i know at one point in high school i had very long hair, until i cut it off- it was blue and i have it in a box somewhere. also when i moved out of state i grew out my hair again, mostly because i was absolutely miserable for many reasons and didn’t do anything but lie in bed. i can’t really remember what my opinion on having long hair was at the time though i can remember that both times i cut it i was relieved to hair short hair again. i liked having short hair, it was always very fun and mostly very easy. but i really like having long hair right now. it feels a lot like something i am doing because i enjoy it rather than like. something i am doing because i like the idea of it. i like how its always kind of sloppy because, well it’s my hair. of course it is. i don’t brush it, except when i comb conditioner thru it in the shower, and i just use my fingers for that. mostly it is easier because i dont have to worry about cutting it. i last got it trimmed in september and i will probably get it trimmed in september again. it’s nice and it fits into the image of me that im enjoying.

which leads me to my next point, i guess. in august i am going on vacation with my family, my mom & stepdad & all four of my siblings, to florida to go to universal. which im looking forward to cause ive never been and i like doing stuff with my family. however. i have a problem (a gemini problem to say the least) where i present a side of myself that i think someone would most want to see, when im with them. with my family, and my mom especially, this is rly about my body... my mom knows what im like as a person, mostly, so it’s not like i would hide that (tho honestly... i hide all sorts of things from everyone for no reason whatsoever, all the time), but im very careful about what i wear when im around her............ specifically she doesnt know that a) i have my septum pierced (very easy to hide anyway) and b) i have a tattoo on my right arm (kind of difficult to hide but i have done it for 2 years for almost no reason.... whatsoever!). also. also. im very hairy- of course she knows this, but, i don’t shave, my legs, my armpits, anything, except my face (cause thats the only part that bothers me... very correlated to my anxiety tho i always forget that). the legs i know she knows about and it doesnt bother me so much cause i dont think she’ll say anything (cause she saw me in shorts last summer & was like ok w/e - thats right i wore a long sleeved shirt to cover my tattoo & shorts around my mother and she didnt say anything at all). mostly im worried about like, other people staring at me (this is such a huge fear with me now idk why). i might take some clippers to my legs to make them like... stubbly rather than a nice forest or w/e. thats fine. i guess the problem here is that, i need to tell my mom about some of these things before we go on vacation so she doesnt get upset about it, on vacation, or i dont try to wear a long sleeved shirt in florida outside doing things. because i will try.

there are so many things that i dont care if people dont like about me, but its so hard when it’s your body because, there isn’t much i can do about it, it’s very personal to have someone uncomfortable with like... you but not you.

like im already gonna be physically uncomfortable cause im fat and im bad at walking and my mom is super athletic & most of my family is very skinny & im very Very bad in the heat. i’d like to not worry about a) ppl looking at me b) my mom being upset about what i look like c) clothes not feeling right!!

itd be nice to have an easy solution for this that didnt involve weird confrontations with my mom. i came out to her in an email bc i can’t stand to see her do emotions at me.

#diary tag

2 notes · View notes

okwilliamson · 7 years

Text

should be doing homework but im sexting my boy and answering survey questions

1. Who was the last person you held hands with? - ummm i really dont know, syd, seany, evie, luke or bae at home lol

2. Are you outgoing or shy? - mostly shy but when something i want is in the sights i might as well be outgoing to get what i want

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? - BAE

4. Are you easy to get along with? - I think i am easy to get along with, i look mean at first i think and i have trouble controlling my facial expressions lmfao

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? - yeah i think so

6. What kind of people are you attracted to? - fucked up sad boys who will crush my heart / boys in general im straight af to clarify/ but boys with big lips and nice eyes / someone whos funny / someone who will watch shitty movies w me/ BUT if this is just about people in general im attracted to shit lords like myself

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? - um actually maybe?

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? - my bab

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? - no i love talking about sex

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? - umm i have deep convos with everyone lol so probs today with syd and clayton

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? - ‘omw’

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? - oh sheesh idk ive been listening to throwback shit from middle school and also hamilton

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?- honestly the thing i like most in the world

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? - luck yes, miracles not really bc i feel like that has a religious connotation

15. What good thing happened this summer? - i slept with someone new

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? - would i? yes...should i? not at all lol

17. Do you think there is life on other planets? - there has to be right

18. Do you still talk to your first crush? - bro what how would that even be possible

19. Do you like bubble baths?- yeaaaa but never have the chance i dont have bathtubs in my dorm room

20. Do you like your neighbors? - i dont even know my neighbors at all i know the girl next to me is named jackie and shes nice

21. What are you bad habits? - im a mess all the time like i dont clean up after myself, i dont even care if im living in trash ill just keep adding more trash to the pile. i dont shower enough lol, and im obsessive

22. Where would you like to travel? - anywhere!! i wanna go west

23. Do you have trust issues? - yes kinda, i have a hard time being vulnerable with people bc i build up this wall to keep myself hard and safe away from potential sadness x d

24. Favorite part of your daily routine? - umm makeup probably :)

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? - probs my double chin lmfao but i can take selfies and look good anyways

26. What do you do when you wake up? - i like have to pee as soon as i wake up

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? - im good with my skin tone tbh but it would be nice to be able to tan vs burn

28. Who are you most comfortable around? - syd, evie, luke, mik, bella, my sister 4 sure,

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? - no lol

30. Do you ever want to get married? - ummm idk im not really like super hype to the idea but it could be cool

31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail? - ya girl has a buzz cut lol

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? - wowwie idk

33. Spell your name with your chin. - miss me w that

34. Do you play sports? What sports? - literally no sports are like the least interesting thing in my opinion

35. Would you rather live without TV or music? - shit idk thats so hard bc i use tv as like back ground noise a lot of the time but music helps me with everything else i cant choose

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? - ummmm yes

37. What do you say during awkward silences? - depends on why its awkward

38. Describe your dream girl/guy? - xd i dont need this

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? - lovesick, xxi?? thats about it oh and thrift stores!!!!!

40. What do you want to do after high school? - bitc im doin it im in art school

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?- yes for sure i give everyone a lot of chances

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean? - im sick/sad/angry lol

43. Do you smile at strangers? - i try to

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? - outer space

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? - classes bb

46. What are you paranoid about?- money all the time

47. Have you ever been high? - yes lol

48. Have you ever been drunk? - also yes

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? - ummmmmm yikes idk no not really

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore? - green

51. Ever wished you were someone else? - i used to but not recently

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? - work ethic

53. Favourite makeup brand? - sheesh i think jeffree star cosmetics & lime crime

54. Favourite store? - not sure

55. Favourite blog? - probs claudias

56. Favourite colour?- pink

57. Favourite food? - pizza i think

58. Last thing you ate? - pizza lol

59. First thing you ate this morning?- i didnt eat this morning

60. Ever won a competition? For what? - no i dony think so

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?- nah

62. Been arrested? For what?- nope

63. Ever been in love? - i believe so! i fall in love with people all the time lol

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?- i was in 8th grade and his name was garrett and he was my first bf ever and we kissed on my front porch it was very cliche

65. Are you hungry right now? - for the first time in a while actually yes

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? - literally no i dont really have tumblr friends

67. Facebook or Twitter? - twitter 68. Twitter or Tumblr? - this is tough bc i frequent both but probs tumblr

69. Are you watching tv right now? - nope

70. Names of your bestfriends? - claudia, syd, evie, luke, mik, bella

71. Craving something? What? - HUMMUS

72. What colour are your towels? - one is like peachy and the other one is purple but i never use that one bc i cleaned up fruit juice off the floor w it and never cleaned it lol

72. How many pillows do you sleep with? - a lot like 3 pillows and i use blankets as like body pillows for that snuggly vibe

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? - just one hello kitty lol

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? - total i have quite a few but i dont bring them to school with me

75. Favourite animal? - ummm i really dont know tbh

76. What colour is your underwear? - black

77. Chocolate or Vanilla? vanilla for ice cream / chocolate for like cupcakes or cake

78. Favourite ice cream flavour? - tbh mint choco chip or phish food by ben and jerrys

79. What colour shirt are you wearing? - currently just chilling in my bra fam

80. What colour pants? - black leggings lol

81. Favourite tv show? - right now the office for sure / but also my 600 lb life

82. Favourite movie? - i have so many , django unchained, perks of being a wallflower, across the universe, i lowkey love the twilight series?? idk im not well versed in classic film just shitty films that have a special place in my heart

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? - this is an ugly quest but the original mean girls 4 sure

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street? - mean girls lmao

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls? -janice lol

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? - bro idk finding nemo is not something i think about a lot lolol but probs the badass fish jawn w his ripped up fin

87. First person you talked to today?- my sister

88. Last person you talked to today?- just now syd

89. Name a person you hate? - donald trump

90. Name a person you love? - claudia <3

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? - um not currently except maybe if my illness was personified then i would punch that bitch

92. In a fight with someone? - i dont fight w people lol

93. How many sweatpants do you have? - literally 1 pair i think

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? - SO many lol

95. Last movie you watched? - twilight last night lol

96. Favourite actress? - hmmm, i love charlize theron, kristen stewart but not bc of twilight her other movies are fire

97. Favourite actor? i love tom hardy, eddie redmayne, john boyega

98. Do you tan a lot?- not at all

99. Have any pets? - one cat named Bo

100. How are you feeling? - kinda shit but ok

101. Do you type fast? - pretty fast, working in call centers get ur typing skills on fleek lol

102. Do you regret anything from your past? - a few things of course but at the same time whats the point in regretting things you know, it just gives you more baggage to carry around and that shit sucks

103. Can you spell well? - for the most part i think but sometimes shits questionable lol

104. Do you miss anyone from your past? - ummm no not really

105. Ever been to a bonfire party? - yes i have it was a strange experience

106. Ever broken someone’s heart? - no way bruh people break my heart all the time tho it seems lol

107. Have you ever been on a horse? - yes but i was like 8 i think i was sooo young

108. What should you be doing? - im chillin

109. Is something irritating you right now? - BEING SICK

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? - yessssss

111. Do you have trust issues? - not so much trust issues but i have a hard time putting my walls down for people

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? - ummm syd and luke hahah

113. What was your childhood nickname? - liv, livy, liver, livy loo ( my mom calls me this when shes salty at me) my dad has always called me scooter crunch i have no idea what thats from, or any variation sometimes its just scooter and recently he called me scooter mc crunchy and that was even a lot for me lol , oh and olive!!

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? - yes ive been out of ohio but not to anywhere very exciting

115. Do you play the Wii? - i did once upon a time

116. Are you listening to music right now? - yes frank ocean’s blond album

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?- i mean its fine

118. Do you like Chinese food? - i love it but only from like select places bc mediocre chinese is always kinda a let down

119. Favourite book? - harry potter series, perks, sula,

120. Are you afraid of the dark?- sadly yes

121. Are you mean? - i am sometimes lol i cant even lie

122. Is cheating ever okay? - i dont think so

123. Can you keep white shoes clean? - dude no

124. Do you believe in love at first sight? - this is always a question in these

125. Do you believe in true love? - ofc

126. Are you currently bored? - nah im cool

127. What makes you happy? - makeup, photography, my friends, my sister

128. Would you change your name? - no ive never thought of something that suits me more than olivia, which is why im cool with my nicknames

129. What your zodiac sign? - scorpio

130. Do you like subway? - as in sandwhiches yes lol

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? - i would be shocked lmfao

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? - ummm idk ive been kind of mia recently from being sick but probs syd

133. Favourite lyrics right now? - the whole wiped out album by the neighbourhood

134. Can you count to one million? - ive never tried and i probably never will but on principal yes i can count

135. Dumbest lie you ever told? umm idk that im ok? i try not to lie about trivial things but if im sad or something and someone im not comfy w asks me about it ill just be like yeh im good

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? - closed i live in a dorm room lol

137. How tall are you? -5′6

138. Curly or Straight hair?- i have a buzz cut so neither

139. Brunette or Blonde? - is this an opinion question bc i have blue hair so like

140. Summer or Winter? - man im more of a fall/spring type

141. Night or Day? - day i think

142. Favourite month? - november but im really tired of my friends trying to kill themselves in my birthday month tbh LOL

143. Are you a vegetarian? - no but maybe i should be so i wouldnt be so fucking sick all the time

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? milk

145. Tea or Coffee? - i really like both

146. Was today a good day? - my day hasnt even really started

147. Mars or Snickers? - snickers i guess 148. What’s your favourite quote? - i dont really have one tbh

149. Do you believe in ghosts? - yuh

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? - the only book i have with me is my science book and thats not interesting at all so lol imma skip this one

#if you read all of these idk why #personal #questions and answers #for the lolz

2 notes · View notes