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sunny-m0o0n · 4 months

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I read the worst fanfic.... And survived?? :0

I would like to start this off with, I mean no harm with this post. And no disrespect meant to the original author. The thing was just bad. But please don't go send the author hate. Im just talking about what I saw wrong here.

I think we are all acquainted with the fanfiction called my immortal. If you don't know of this... masterpiece(?) I envy you, and you should skip this. There is time for you to save yourself.

I somehow managed to read this in school, on the school computer. And I was mostly doing it as a joke, reading the first chapter out loud to my friend. When I reached the second chapter is where it got really wired, like the absolute mischaracterization is god awful. Dumbledor yelling at Ebony and Draco for you-know-whating, let alone calling, them 'motherfuckers'. Its just wild. I was crying from laughing, and my friend had to genuinely ask if I was ok. I was not.

I made the mistake of reading at home, the whole thing. In almost one setting. Just for reference if you ignored my warning, the chapters where about as long as what you have read so far. So they did not take me long to read at all. Then again there was 44.

As bad as this was, I will say it was fucking funny. All the character's are cannon harry potter character's, but made 'goth'. I.e. The author made the all edgy vampires with ass names, and black hair. For example, Harry was Vampire, Ron was Darkness, Past Voldemort called himself Satan, as that was his middle name. Even though he had a cannon one.

Some of them are just blatant miss-spellings. Snape was Snoop, or Snake a lot, and my favorite one, Nevil was Navel. I just found that one really funny. There was a lot of words spelled wrong, sometimes to the point of it being unreadable.

I would consider myself to be a more alterative style, I like punk, grunge, emo and other things of that sort. I am however aware of goth culture and bands. So the fact that they were almost all goths, spelled goffic/goffik. And they just had to be all vampire satanists, and only where black, was just horrible.

The worst part for me was when anytime music was brought up it was my chemical romance (emo), Lincoln Park (alt), green day (punk) and slipknot (nu metal) I was pretty annoyed. As none of those are gothic bands. The only one im not sure on is Good Charlotte, I have not heard of that one so I dont know what to say it is. I have a good guess its not goth. Please let me know if im wrong on this. But the other ones are bands I listen to and really like.

Also all the mentions of serious topics in this very unserious, troll fic, just made me feel wired? They felt unneeded and just there to be there. They where not mentioned in a respectful way at all. In one of these topics, there was an authors note about how that it was a serious topic. And it was just vagally mentioned. There was so much brushing over of things that irl would not be brushed over. Like sa, sh, and attempted, are just mentioned and then the characters just go on.

I know it's meant to be like this, and I knew about it being called the worst fanfic before going in. But my god, it was horrible.

If you had any criticism you where 'preppy' so 'skrew urself, u suk!111' Im being fully honest the authors note's where more entreating the the 'plot' if you can call it that. The mc named Ebony Darkness dementia way. Smth like that. Has to go back in time to seduce Voldemort so that he wont make her kill Vampire, as she dose not want to kill him because she loves him. If she dose not kill him he will kill Draco, and she loves Draco.

The author keeps saying that Ms. Ebony is not a marry su. When she very much is, she makes her argument that Ebony is not perfect, because she has depression. Yet latter on in the story Ebony is complaining about how all guys fall in love with her, and that she wishes she where ugly. Like- ermmm... If you are asking to be 'ugly' you are most likely a Marry Su.

I feel like I could make this so much longer, but its already nearly an essay. (tbh might write one for fun lol). And it's only my first post on this blog, Im going to end it here. I could go on, as I have yet to mention all the hints at gay and bi fetish, or how some of the adult characters where made pedos.

Love,

Sunny

#my immortal #fanfic #bad fanfiction #myimmortal fanfic #harry potter #harry potter fanfiction #long post #rant post

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relishredshoes · 3 years

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Interview given to The Severus Snape and Hermione Granger Shipping Fan Group. (sharing here Admin approved)

https://www.facebook.com/groups/199718373383293/

Hello Oracle Obscured and welcome to Behind the Quill, thank-you for letting us get to know you a little better.

Many readers will know you already and if they don’t I encourage them to look your works up including Teaching Miss Granger and How I learned to love teachers’ meetings

Okay, let’s jump right in.

What's the story behind your pen name?

Hmmm ... that’s kind of a weird answer for me. I wanted to choose a name that didn’t immediately indicate whether I was male or female. I’d noticed a certain freedom afforded to authors of indistinguishable gender. With no societal construct about the “nature” of the creator, the story stood on its own, without prejudice or conditioned expectations.

I brainstormed about six or seven names and then picked the one that appealed to me most. I’ve always felt drawn to the idea of oracles (those who see beyond). And I definitely felt obscured in that department. (Hell, at the time, my whole life felt obscured.)

Which Harry Potter character do you identify with the most?

I don’t know if I do. I guess if I had to pick, I’d say Hermione, as I have a tendency to be an obsessive perfectionist when it comes to work/studying. I like to be organized and plan things out. And I can be quite demanding and harsh with myself when I feel like I’m not measuring up to my own insane ideals.

But I took that openpsychometrics.org statistical quiz a while back, where you answer like a bazillion comparison questions (I did the longer version), and my highest HP match was Remus Lupin (83%). Yeah, I can see that.

Luna is my favorite character, but I don’t know if I identify with her more than anyone else.

Do you have a favourite genre to read? (not in fic, just in general)

It used to be horror/suspense, but ... I don’t know ... I’m just not as into it anymore. Maybe it’s because the real world is horrifying enough without adding fictional monsters to the mix.

Now I mostly read classics.

Do you have a favourite "classic" novel?

To Kill a Mockingbird.

At what age did you start writing?

Just writing stories in general? Maybe second grade. It wasn’t a passion or anything, just something I was pretty good at. I only really did it at school, though, not so much at home. I read A LOT growing up, so I naturally imagined that I might be an author one day. I tried to write a book when I was about 13 or 14, but less than one chapter in, I decided it was too hard. (I was NOT a Hermione growing up. Planning and perseverance were not my style.)

I took a massive break from thinking after high school (the smorgasbord of medications I was on didn’t like me using my brain too much, and my plans for college went out the window when my depression become unmanageable). I didn’t really start writing again until I was about twenty-seven. That was when I found fanfiction. I consider that when I really started writing.

How did you get into writing fanfiction?

I found fanfiction while looking for erotica. Needless to say I discovered the motherlode, and I was hooked. Over the years, I’d written bits and pieces of my own sexy scenarios (which is what you do when you grow up without the internet and you have to depend on your imagination for all your kink requirements), but I’d never really thought about taking someone else’s “story world” and using it as my setting. For a little over a year I read/devoured all the HP fanfiction I could, and then I realized I could take all the fantasies in my head and play them out with my favorite characters.

The first story I wrote was a funny/smutty Ginny/Draco thing, and it was HORRIBLE. The story and the sex were fine, but the writing was a nightmare. I submitted it to The Restricted Section, which was the only site I knew at the time, and they vetted their stories, so I had to get approved. They wrote me back saying it needed work and I should get a beta. So I went on the forum and found one (which was rather brave of me now that I think back). The person who helped me must’ve had the patience of a saint, because he/she(?) never said a damn thing about all the mistakes and shitty-ness. Suggestions and corrections were made, and I changed some of the pronouns to names so it wouldn’t sound so repetitive. The next time I submitted it, they accepted, and I got a decent response for a first-time writer (like three or four nice reviews). No one seemed to hate it, and the reviewers said the sex was hot, so I tried again, hoping to do better.

That’s when I wrote the first chapter of Teaching Miss Granger. It started out as just a oneshot. And it got a much better response. I wanted to write more, but I became extremely depressed and lethargic, and I didn’t really do anything for the next six or seven years. (I mean nothing. Unless you consider watching every episode of Law & Order CI and SVU ten times over to be an accomplishment.)

I came back to it years later, intending to add a few chapters to TMG where they have sex, but ... it just sort of evolved into the monster that it is. I worked on it pretty much every day for about a year. I’d never stuck with ANYTHING that long in my entire life.

What's the best theme you've ever come across in a fic? Is it a theme represented in your own works?

I would say love or “the power of love” is probably my favorite theme. But that includes synonyms for love as well. (Like wholeness, which is the theme of Quartet.)

What fandoms are you involved in other than Harry Potter?

None. I like other fandoms, but I don’t write for them, and I don’t usually read their fanfiction.

If you could make one change to canon, what would it be? Do you have a favourite piece of fanon?

I’ve never really thought about changing cannon. I mean, I change it to suit my fictional purposes (like Snape lives etc.), but I wouldn’t want to change canon for real. The deaths in HP serve a purpose, and while I find many of those deaths heartbreaking, that’s kind of the point. Hatred is bleak and destructive, and good people don’t survive wars simply because they’re good; bad things happen to good people all the time. As for changing something about the individual characters, I can’t get behind that either. The reasons people do things are multifaceted and complex and they’re colored by a lifetime of experiences I will never know or understand, so I don’t feel I can really judge. I can’t say I understand all the choices I’ve made in my own life, and there’ve been plenty of times where I had no choice at all. I can’t hold others to more rigorous standards than I myself can meet. We all have our shortcomings. (And that’s cool. Without them, there would be no growth or diversity.)

Do I have a favorite piece of fanon? Hmmm ... probably Head Boy and Head girl rooming together or having private rooms.

Oh! And uniforms.

Do you listen to music when you write or do you prefer quiet?

I used to listen to really quiet classical music while wearing headphones. Every little sound in the house distracts me, and I have to block it out. But lately I’ve just been running this old box fan that drowns out the noise.

What are your favourite fanfictions of all time?

Crap, I don’t know if I can choose. (Plus I feel like I’ve forgotten a lot of what I’ve read.)

My friend Desert Sea is my fav Hermione/Severus writer. Out of her stories, the ones I like best are In Their Hands and At the Headmaster’s Discretion.

After a brief search of my accounts, I’ll go with:

Do Not Go Gentle by senlinyu

Another Dream by dragoon811

The Last Twenty-Four Hours of Severus Snape by CryingCinderella

Pretty much everything by Aurette

Pet Project by Caeria

Post Tenebras, Lux by Loten

All the SS/HG stuff from snapeslittleblackbuttons

There’s a Teddy Radiator story that I like a lot, but I can’t remember the name of it. (Or what it’s about.) (Yes, very helpful, I know.)

And in a category all it’s own is Farmer Granger and the Most Glorious Cock by MyWitch. (Seriously, I read this like once a month and it makes me laugh every time.)

I read a lot of Drarry too. Drarry stories I love:

Everything by bixgrl1, but especially Balance Imperfect and In Evidence of Magical Theory

Everything by lq_traintracks (even the non-Drarry stuff). The writing is amazing.

I love all the advent stories by Saras_girl.

I like all the Drarry stories I’ve read by Faithwood.

I really like RZZMG’s writing. (No particular story or pairing.)

And I just rediscovered a story I found in 2007 (the first m/m fic I ever read). It’s a Snarry, which I know isn’t everyone’s cup of tea, but it was excellent. Snape: the Home Fries Nazi by pir8fancier

Are you a plotter or a pantser? How does that affect your writing process?

I enjoy a bit of both. My oneshots are all pantsed. TMG was totally pantsed. But Getting Personal and Quartet were both plotted and planned. For GP I did sort of a chapter by chapter synopsis before starting my rough draft, and for Q I went into even more detail—EVERYTHING was planned out ahead of time. The only thing that changed during the first draft was I ended up combining some of the chapters.

How does plotting affect my writing process compared to pantsing? It streamlines it. In a oneshot there’s not much to streamline; the basic story (or general idea) is all you really need. There’s not enough story to get muddled. But when I’m writing something longer, with multiple chapters, I find it’s better to know where the story is going. How deeply I go into that planning can vary. Sometimes there’s just a basic outline of the major plot points and then I fly by the seat of my pants from there. Sometimes I write out a very rough synopsis (sort of like a short and loose first draft) and then start writing as if it’s my second draft. Things inevitably get changed once I really start writing, so the planning isn’t set in stone by any means, but when I plan, the story goes in the general direction I intend without veering too far off course and there aren’t any plot holes. After I wrote TMG (with no planning) I saw that there was A LOT I could have cut or combined without affecting anything important. I learned a little more with each story I wrote, and when I got to Q, there was a lot of complicated ideas that I wanted to incorporate, and there were so many characters (and character arcs) going on that I had to plan extensively to make sure everything fit together. If I hadn’t worked it out ahead of time, it would’ve been like throwing a heap of puzzle pieces on the table but not being given a reference picture to know what it was I was working toward.

What is your writing genre of choice?

I have no idea. Plotty sex? Erotic dramady? Some of it is just straight up PWP, but I usually like to have something meaningful in there too.

Which of your stories are you most proud of? Why?

Usually the answer is whatever I’ve most recently written, as it’s the most likely to represent my current “best.” In terms of writing, I’ll go with A Brush with Magic, but Quartet is probably my best storytelling. A lot went into that (symbolism, planning, obsessive re-writes) and it holds a good deal of personal meaning to me. So, I guess I’ll go with Q due to the time and effort involved.

Did it unfold as you imagined it or did you find the unexpected cropped up as you wrote? What did you learn from writing it?

The unexpected always crops up (even with all my planning), and it’s the unexpected that makes the magic.

While I had many insights into my own nature while writing Quartet, in the end I think it taught me to trust/listen to myself more.

Later, however, it brought me a very different message. While writing it, I felt a lot of tension and anxiety; I wanted to “do it right” and present my story in the best light. But after some time away, I realized I’d been so worried because I felt as if that story represented me, as if it defined me. And the pressure of being judged worthy or unworthy had been eating me alive.

But I don’t feel that way anymore. Now it’s like I wrote all my stories in another lifetime. While they all might be a snapshot of a fraction of my mind, nothing I create ever says a damn thing about who or what I truly am. Since letting go of that, I’ve found a sense of freedom around writing. I still like to express things as clearly and beautifully as I can, but it’s more a celebration of words than a search for acceptance.

How personal is the story to you, and do you think that made it harder or easier to write?

Quartet was extremely personal to me when I wrote it, and in a lot of ways I think that made it easier to write. When I have to go strictly by imagination, I feel as if I’m missing some depth of understanding (like I’m getting the surface-level stuff, but missing the nuance). When I write from experience, it has an entirely different quality. Richer. More intimate. It’s work to write what I don’t know, but it’s easy to write the truth.

Posting, however, is an entirely different story. Other people don’t always want the truth, and if you feel like your story is an extension of you, it can hurt to have any part of it rejected.

What books or authors have influenced you? How do you think that shows in your writing?

I think everything I’ve ever read or seen has influenced me. In terms of writing, I guess I’d say I’m inspired by beauty in all its forms. When I first started reading fanfiction, I just searched for the kinks I liked; it was all about the sex (with bonus points for having a decent plot). Then one day I read an extremely well-written PWP (I don’t remember what), and the way the author described the sex was so unlike anything I had ever read, it totally blew my mind. It was art. Exquisite art. And before that, I didn’t know sex could be art. That author didn’t just recount the characters’ actions, they painted a word masterpiece—they turned porn into poetry. THAT was what I wanted in my life. And I didn’t know it until that moment.

Books/authors that stick with me:

The Harry Potter series (obviously).

Shel Silverstein (Love the poetry, but The Giving Tree is one of my favorite books of all time.)

Dr. Seuss (Always.)

Judy Blume (I still have my copy of Are You There God it’s Me Margaret from when I was, like, 10. Tiger Eyes is my favorite of hers.)

R.L. Stine (I got hooked prior to the creation of the Goosebumps series, but I had EVERY Fear Street Book he wrote when I was in middle school.)

Weekend by Christopher Pike (This was the first YA thriller I ever read. *Sigh* memories. I still have my original copy, and I still read it every once in a while. The characters and plot are great.)

Stephen King (Carrie is my fav.)

Anne Rice (I’ve read all the vampire and witch books, but The Witching Hour is the only one I’ve read multiple times. Blackwood Farm is my next favorite.)

To Kill a Mockingbird

Charles Dickens (David Copperfield is my fav.)

Jane Austen (I can’t pick between Pride & Prejudice and Sense & Sensibility.)

Thomas Harris (Brilliant writing, and Hannibal might be one of the most intriguing anti-heros ever.)

Stieg Larsson (Another brilliant writer with a brilliant character.)

The Giver by Lois Lowry (I haven’t read the rest of the trilogy. And I haven’t seen the movie. I refuse to besmirch my childhood love with Hollywood’s interpretation.)

Bridge to Terabithia (This book devastated me as a child.)

Gillian Flynn (Sharp Objects is my fav.)

Liane Moriarty (I like all of her books, especially Big Little Lies. The way she plays with the timeline is masterful.)

Frank Herbert’s Dune. (I grew up on this. It’s my dad’s all-time favorite book. And, yes, we’re looking forward to the new movie.)

Margaret Atwood (The Handmaid’s Tale is horrifyingly wonderful. And Atwood herself is fascinating. Watch her Masterclass if you get the chance.)

Steinbeck’s East of Eden (This might be my second favorite book.)

The Lucifer Effect by Phillip Zimbardo (This isn’t fiction, but it was the first book that really affected the way I see the world.)

Eisler’s The Chalice and the Blade (Also not fiction. If you’re interested in the divine feminine and a more egalitarian society, this is the book for you.)

Loving What Is by Byron Katie (The only self-help book that’s ever actually helped me.)

Daphne Du Maurier (I love Rebecca, but she also has a story called “The Blue Lenses” that isn’t really intended to be scary, but it freaked me the fuck out.)

The Secret History by Donna Tartt (Gorgeous writing, and the plot left me seriously disturbed.)

One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest by Ken Kesey (Gah! I love this. The writing and the story and the characters and EVERYTHING!)

Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury (I Bradbury’s writing style, but the plot of F451 is pure horror for any book hoarder lover.)

The Lord of the Flies by William Golding (This might be my third favorite book ever. No, wait, I might like it better than East of Eden. I can’t choose!)

The Diary of Anne Frank (How in the hell could anyone read this and not be affected by it?)

Do people in your everyday life know you write fanfiction?

No. This is my own private world, and I like it that way.

How true for you is the notion of "writing for yourself"?

Very. I write what I want to read. There are certain adjustments I make when I write for other people as opposed to what I do when writing strictly for myself, but nothing major. I refuse to write things I have no interest in, and I don’t write to make people happy. I write to please myself. (But it’s nice when what pleases me pleases others. It’s wonderful to share that connection.)

How important is it for you to interact with your audience? How do you engage with them? Just at the point of publishing? Through social media?

I like hearing from my readers. I don’t have a lot of time to interact, but I like talking to my audience and listening to their insights. I try to reply to all the comments I get on AO3 (it’s just too hard on FFN). And when I have free time (which isn’t often) I check my FB groups to see what’s going on. To me, the interaction kind of completes the creative cycle; it helps me set the story free and allow it to be. It really belongs to the reader once I’ve published, and it’s nice to see the ripples creativity creates.

What is the best advice you've received about writing?

Unless it’s absolutely necessary, stop using the word “was.” Completely changed my writing.

What do you do when you hit writer's block?

It doesn’t really happen that much, as I usually know where I’m going with my story, but there can be glitches between scenes or times when I can’t find the words for something (like ending a chapter). When that happens, I usually just leave it and come back later—I can’t force it if it won’t come.

If I really need to get it done for some reason, I read what I have over and over, adding a little bit more each time, trying out words that “sound right” and building what I need bit by bit. What I come up with isn’t always right or what I want, but at least I have something to work with. Sometimes seeing what’s wrong makes what you want more obvious.

Has anything in real life trickled down into your writing?

Yeah, just about everything Sex, depression, anxiety, personal growth, likes/dislikes, insights, interests, philosophy, all my little neuroses. Every once in a while I’ll even include some dialogue from real life.

Do you have any stories in the works? Can you give us a teaser?

I’m juggling about five long stories right now (plus a couple oneshots). And I haven’t worked on any of them in ages. I don’t know what’s going on with me; I’m just not in the mood. I don’t want to say what they are, as I might never finish them. (Two are Drarry and three are Sevmione. One is a compilation of oneshots. Four of them are completely planned out and just need to be written. The unplanned Drarry was always just meant to be for myself and I doubt I’ll ever release it.)

Any words of encouragement to other writers?

Yes. Enjoy the whole writing/creative process as much as possible. Try not to beat yourself up, and don’t try to force yourself to be better. You will naturally get better the more you write. Change is inevitable; allow it to happen. Read books about writing, and read good writers. Notice what brings you the most pleasure when you read and tap into that same pleasure when you write. Play with words and ideas just for fun. Watch and see what appears. There is no perfect.

If you’re writing about sex (because I get asked about that a lot), write what turns YOU on. Don’t try to be sexy. Don’t try to write what you think other people want to hear. Don’t worry about what other people think (at least in the first draft). If they don’t like it they can go read something else. But if YOU like it, it will shine through in your writing, and that will have a bigger impact on your reader than any activity you describe. Also, the physicality is only a fraction of the sexual experience. Don’t turn your sex scenes into a play-by-play. You’re not really writing about what the characters are doing so much as how what they’re doing affects them. It’s a personal experience, and the more personal you make it (the more honest and vulnerable you are as a writer) the more satisfying the story will be for your reader. Wise words! Thank-you so much for speaking with us today Oracle Obscured.

#snamione #writing #fanfiction #fanfic

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rabidfangirlteehee · 5 years

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Harry Potter rewrite

A lot of the time when I look at fanfiction I kind of think of it as an alternative to read because the original exists. As in I don’t necessarily think Slytherin Harry is better than Griffindor Harry but because Harry is in Gryffindor in cannon Slytherin Harry is fun to explore.

So I started to wonder what would I change about canon if it couldn’t be changed back. If hypothetically I could change the story and what was originally there wouldn’t exist only this book series would exist. What would I do?

So first of all I would give Hermione an arc. There are characters that I think have good setups for arcs but weren’t fully explored. Hermione is one of them. She didn’t technically have an arc over the course of the series. She had an arc in the first book where she learnt that being a good student and clever and respectful of authority isn’t always the most important or valuable thing to be. But despite this her willingness to break the rules is still commented on as if its a big moment for her going against rules and authority. Sure Hermione isn’t the type to vocally sass authority figures like Harry or Ron. But she lit Snape on fire without a second thought in the first book. And has done something or another rebellious on her own accord in pretty much every book. Wouldn’t really say its an arc overall. Often it seems less like she grew or changed but rather you saw a side to her that didn’t exist. Which is fine. But since she does have a good set up for an arc I want to go with it.

Hermione is great but she’s not the best people person. She is usually bad at empathy she tries not to be but it leads her to be accidentally insensitive more so than other kids her age. This can be forgivable if you know where she’s coming from and are understanding of her as a person. But its hard to do that before you know that and kids aren’t always the most understanding bunch. So rather than becoming automatic best friends after the Troll incident what happens is that Harry Ron and Hermione get closer.

They still aren’t the trio yet but the duo with Hermione third wheeling. Her becoming closer to them is an arc with them slowly bonding more with shared experiences and realizing they have more in common than they thought. She is still more involved in their schemes than others but because she’s not automatic best friend she’s not always the one Harry and Ron go to. This also lends a way for Harry and Ron to get close to other students and bond with them too.

Hermione in the meantime does struggle to get people to understand her better. She’s not the best at communicating her feelings and thoughts and sometimes just does things. She’s most usually right but maintaining relationships aren’t really about who was most right in a situation. But as they get to know her better despite the hiccups she learns to explain herself better and while she never gets the best people skills they grow to understand her better and appreciate her efforts and push others to do the same.

Secondly Draco and other Slytherins. Draco had sorta a redemption near the end by showing he really wasn’t into this Voldemort stuff, and by not telling Bellatrix about Harry in disguise. He also ends up marrying someone in canon whose views go against the views he was raised with and he embraces those views and rejects his parents views. So clearly the intention that he would change for the better but it wasn’t really explored and it happened so near the end it left less of an impact. This is also true for the not all Slytherins are evil idea. I think that was Rowling’s intention but showing good Slytherin’s happens too close to the end so it feels more like exceptions to the rule. So instead we can see moments where Harry sees Slytherins being good decent people and not bigots. So we can acknowledge while some are and they do have influence and power they aren’t all Slytherins or even necessarily most. So we can acknowledge the names of the ones who are bigots and the ones who aren’t the ones who aren’t can even help out Harry occasionally and make temporary groups with Harry for certain issues happening in school. Overtime while Draco maintains a rivilry with Harry you can see him back away from his bigoted beliefs in his behavior, the language he uses, and the friends he has even changing the minds of certain people who used to be bigoted. He might end up either running away from home in his summer over 5th year rather than joining the death eaters. This could also help him parallel Sirius. I personally see Draco in canon as what could have happened to Sirius had he not been exposed to people like James sooner. His exposure to ideas that challenged what he had known as true led him to question more things at an early age. As a consequence of this Lucius is killed but he Narcissa and Draco discuss it beforehand. That staying is a bad idea that even though there may be consequences they will be fine but despite that Draco should leave. Draco is led to believe they will both survive. He is just a kid he wants to believe that he wants to trust in that so he does. But as they do this Narcissa and Lucius both know that at least one if not both of them will end up dead. Its not that Lucius suddenly decided everything Voldemort stood for was wrong but Voldemort was tyrannical and controlling enough that he didn’t want his son involved despite the fact that tensions were higher between them due to Draco’s beliefs conflicting with his own and that becoming more apparent. Perhaps it was because of that it felt more necessary with beliefs like that Draco was doomed by staying.

So he ends up running away and when he does Dumbledore has him hide in Grimmauld place. While he might come back 5th year he may refuse to in his 6th year or very occasionally have to leave school due to close calls and hide out at Grimmauld place. To explore more of his similarities to Sirius, Sirius ends up living and mentoring both Harry and Draco somewhat in addition to finally becoming a free man. So he can still be an asset in book 6 and 7 as he survives the war ( as does Remus). Draco is devastated by the consequences of running away but stands by it as if he goes back now his father would have died for nothing.

Next would be Snape. Snape’s redemption in Harry’s eyes always bothered me because it seemed to just be because Snape loved Lilly. I mean perhaps that’s sympathetic. But its lets sympathetic if you consider that its the only reason he went against Voldemort. There is nothing to indicate that his beliefs changed at anypoint. Or that he resented the work he did for Voldemort. Only that he resented Voldemort for killing Lilly. But to see him as truly sympathetic and to believe that he was redeemed in Harry’s eyes that change in beliefs is very important.

Another thing that bothered me in the series was how the love potion was handled. It wasn’t explored much in story. But it did strike me as odd how casual everyone treated it when it effectively is just the imperius with a dose of infatuation and the imperius is framed as so awful. Actual incidents referring to people using it aren’t that common. Molly mentions using it casually Romilda Vane uses it and its mostly shown in a comedic light till Ron is poisoned. The only way it’s really shown with any importance is with Merope Gaunt.

Merope had a horrific life and wanted and escape. She had the means to use a love potion to make Tom Riddle Sr. be with her so she did. This is pretty much brainwashing. Dumbledore even said both the imperius and love potion were options and that Merope probably used love potion solely because it would have seemed more romantic to her. However what is focused on here is mostly the heartbreak she suffered after she realized the love she was getting wasn’t really loved and wanted the real thing having never received it. And once Tom Sr. rejected her she lost the will to live and refused to use magic. Her pain his highlighted while her victims feelings aren’t really considered at all. Which is a bit yikes. So I would put in a longer first chapter in book 4. It would begin with Tom Riddle Sr coming back after his random romance with this girl no one even knew really existed and people were surprised he eloped with. They weren’t surprised he broke things off with her they couldn’t even explain why he left with her in the first place. Neither could he. But people didn’t bring it up much. He seemed pretty disturbed by the whole relationship. He’d come back changed much less social and more neurotic. It was a weirdly dramatic shift people were sure she’d done something to him but no one could figure out what. He wouldn’t speak of it. He grew withdrawn outside of his family he only communicated with one person. The gardener Frank. He was always very kind to Frank they got along great. So people were horrified when Frank was arrested for killing the Riddle family. Even though he was released people believed he had done it. The shade being thrown wasn’t only for killing his employers who were prolific members of the community but for betraying a broken man who trusted him. After that the end of the chapter plays out similarly with Frank in his old age going to investigate the abandoned Manor coming across Voldemort and Pettigrew discussing the Triwizard cup and being killed by Voldemort.

The last huge arc I would add is Molly. Molly is an overprotective at times controlling Mother whose entire family is involved in a covert war and constantly worries about the death of her family members. Her arc can involve her understanding that she can’t protect her children forever realizing that by trying to keep them safe by being controlling she could push them into rebelling in very dangerous impulsive ways they may have not otherwise have considered.

So firstly Percy doesn’t side with Fudge he sides with Dumbledore. He is very eager of approval and recognition and acceptance from people who he respects. But he respects Dumbledore and his parents more than Fudge and has always been the good child the obedient one.

Instead of him leaving the Twins leave after having a fight about the direction of their future. Despite the fact that Molly is no longer keen on the Ministry her trying to push them to be something they are not has had an impact. The last summer she did ruin the inventions they’d be working on all summer. That would be a very big deal I think at their age. And she has been against their aspirations which can weigh down on them At home the rest are acting out more.

The more freaked out Molly gets the more controlling she gets to keep the kids safe and fights to stop the younger ones( Ron and Ginny) from getting involved shes also nervous about Bill and Charlie getting involved and has some tension with Bill over Fleur. Harry also rejects her attempt to keep him from Order related information.

But eventually she realizes even in intense times she still cant protect them forever. And by talking to Sirius realizes that by trying to push them away she might make them rebel and do something real stupid. So she reconciles with Fred and George and supports all of her kids joining the fight even if she’s scared she thinks it’s a worthy cause.

Percy dies and is the only one who didn’t rebel and didn’t push for independence instead pushing for recognition and appreciation from authority figures he respected rather than following his own wishes. So his death will weigh on her on her worst days. She wonders that unlike the rest of them what if he fought only to meet expectations? Its left ambiguous if her fears are founded or not.

I considered killing off Fred too.

If Fred also died she’d have to do her best to stop George from slipping into depression and get involved in the joke shop finally come to understand the twins while the fact that her stubbornness kept her from being able to show this understanding before Fred died would constantly eat away at her. And honestly I kinda just want to give Molly a break here typing this out is honestly making me really depressed. So just Percy not Fred.

Finally we get to the epilogue and romantic relationships. So my main thing with the epilogue was I cared less about who they ended up with or who their kids and more about what their lives were like .

So for Harry I always thought that him becoming the permanent Defense teacher at Hogwarts would be the biggest snub to Voldemort. Since he got to have Hogwarts as his home when Voldemort wanted to but couldn’t and got the position he wanted to and couldn’t. Plus after all that stuff with Voldemort maybe he’d want something peaceful. As for his romantic relationships.

Harry and Cho go out for longer but don’t workout because both just have too many things to work on but they do remain friends. Harry’s love life is left ambiguous you see several people he had chemistry with but it’s unknown who he’s with or if he’s with anyone. Harry and Ginny never become a thing.

Ron and Hermione however do become a couple Ron is an auror Hermione went into Magical Law. Ron with his desire to not be ordinary and ambitious nature chooses to stay as an Auror and doesn’t help out at the joke shop its not necessary anyway Fred is still alive.

The three have become closer friends with Draco and the non bigot slytherin kids he is friends with. You will see them bonding a lot book 5 onwards but Harry Ron and Hermione were still closer to each other than Draco and his friends. Draco becomes a healer who works at St. Mungo’s.

Bill and Fleur still end up together but not Lupin and Tonks.

Tonks like Lupin and Sirius also survives

Lupin ends up moving in with Sirius permanently and are a confirmed couple. I always thought he and Tonks came out of nowhere and it seemed like their only function as a couple seemed like it was to die so there would be another orphan from the war at least to me. Plus Lupin seemed so hesitant to be with her. Sirius and Lupin on the other hand have a well established relationships lived together for a time period and give joint gifts. Plus I personally love that Draco gets character growth spurred on by them too. Sirius goes on to teach Transfiguration at Hogwarts after Mcgonnigal becomes headmistress ( she can’t do both and who better to teach it than a guy who became an unregistered animagus before he was 15 ).

Hagrid retires from teaching to become specifically just the gameskeeper and Lupin takes the care of Magical creatures class. Even when he did teach Defense he seemed to have a tendency to explore magical creatures associated with dark arts. Once a month he is out of commission and when he is Charlie Weasely comes by to substitute as a side job.

As for next gen kids Bill and Fleur already have a couple kids in the epilogue but it takes place much earlier than when the canon epilogue does. So they are still very young and not old enough to go to Hogwarts yet. Hermione and Ron don’t have kids but Hermione has recently been very invested in this program about reaching out to magical children with non magical guardians to offer support and recently they’ve started reaching out to magical orphanages. So its hinted that Ron and Hermione might end up adopting a magical kid.

The rest of the remaining couples and children remain unconfirmed.

Incidentally if I did add a random couple that came out of nowhere with no basis it would be Fred and Tonks who hooked up years after the series ended based on events you never get to see.

#Harry Potter #headcanon #alternate universe #hp rewrite #mine #Hermione Granger #ginny weasley #Ron Weasley #Sirius #Sirius Black #Remus #Remus Lupin #Wolfstar #Romione #bill weasley #hp #my post #meta #sorta

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slothcritic · 5 years

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She-Ra and the Princesses of Power - Episode 1 Review

What the heck is that sword?

I have a good friend of mine who is into some… varied interests that I would not necessarily partake in on my own. She is responsible for introducing me to shows that I love such as Legend of Korra and Steven Universe, shows that I would have otherwise entirely ignored if not for her insistence on sharing them with me and having us watch them together.

So when she suggested watching She-Ra and the Princesses of Power together… Well, I considered for a moment how I knew absolutely nothing about this show, and then immediately after, I thought of this blog. Going in completely blind does seem like a good opportunity to tackle something new to review.

So, forewarning: I know nothing about this show.

I have no spoilers. I have no context or frame of reference. They mention the word “grayskull” which I believe is a He-Man reference, but I didn’t even watch THAT series, so I’m doubly in the dark for whatever possible tie-ins or references there may be to She-Ra. What you are about to read are my thoughts on a per-episode basis for what I’ve just watched.

With that said, we watched the first episode and I took some brief notes on my first impressions.

My most immediate observation was that these characters definitely have a strong sense of personality and spunk. Perhaps laid on a bit thick, but to be honest, I’m happy there’s at least something to grab onto that isn’t just a dull grey chess piece for exposition.

The series also strikes me as moderately pretentious. It feels too into itself, and I felt the presentation was a little suffocating. The initial mood and tone of the show feels like you’re already armpit-deep in some edgy dystopian fanfiction made by someone who spends way too much time on DeviantArt, complete with cat people and everything. But in spite of that, the animation seems graceful enough and the characters manage to have a distinct style without being painful to look at. Regardless, they definitely set up the first episode like you’re cannon-balling straight into the the deep end of a story that started long before the cameras began rolling.

The character darkshadow or whatever their name is didn’t strike me as anything special, besides serving as the “vaguely ominous mentor figure” - I’m guessing this is some kind of Professor Snape deal. It’s very obvious they want us to feel like Nightmare Jones over here is some kind of dark brooding figure but whether this is a subversion (like Snape) or just face value remains to be seen.

Somewhere not where the main characters are, there’s some kind of queen and her thick-set commander, who is also her daughter. This queen person annoyed me and this entire interaction felt very “young adult novel”, a real eye-roller. I got major Steven Universe vibes here. Not just because of the slightly reminiscent character designs (granted, I do feel this show has a better art style) or because of the color palettes, but because this is just the Diamonds all over again. I found this scene hard to enjoy in earnest or with a straight face, in contrast to the comparatively interesting scene with “blonde main character” and Catra.

No idea if Catra is a pre-existing character from another related series or anything, but… really? You name the cat-alien-monster-species girl Catra? What’s next? A moth-alien-monster-species named Mothra– Oh.

The spooky woods reminded me of Harry Potter. Though I found the claim of “no squad has ever made it out there!!” falls a little flat when three under-prepared children can just wander through it like it’s no big deal. I mean, okay, maybe a little deal. Maybe having your rank-and-file blonde soldier girl undergo a magical girl transformation to become an ancient Aryan goddess helps your chances of survival. Because seriously, am I the only one who noticed the blue eyes and blonde hair right away? Ubermensch, more like uberwomensch.

The plot and world building has a good hook but some lines of dialogue or phrasings are incredibly generic.

You are the chosen one! Yes, you! Completely random person! You must journey through the sacred unicorn forests and unite the magical elements of harmony across the land in order to restore balance to the universe and defeat the evil empire once and for all…

Though to be fair - I thought the opening crawl for Undertale was painfully generic the first time I played it, and that game ended being one of my all time favorites. So a generic, done to death a million times choice of words does not a bad story make.

What draws my attention most about this first episode, especially as we get closer to the credits, is the sword. That’s intentional, and it works. The story doesn’t show its hand right away but gives you enough clues to start making plausible guesses. There’s some idea of unity here or people being connected across vast distances with the help of this sword that I can get behind.

Conclusion

The story as a whole seems fine enough, but there’s no punch to the gut that gets me invested in it yet. My policy is that I give any show five episodes to make me want to continue watching it. For reference: One Piece, my current favorite anime, took five episodes. Doctor Who (Ninth Doctor) took five minutes.

Now, the first episode of any show is generally the hardest to get started with and the one of which I’m often the most critical. Who are all these new characters? What attachment do I have to them? Why should I care? Questions like that become easier to answer as the characters become more strongly identifiable in the next few episodes. It is not impossible for some shows to knock it out of the park on the first episode. This show did not do that.

Episode 1 doesn’t exactly have me foaming at the mouth waiting for Episode 2, but at least I have certain hopes and points of interest to keep an eye out for in the next one. The intrigue of the plot saves this episode from a lower score.

Score: 66

Passing Thoughts

I like Catra. She seems well defined and very clearly executed as a character. Not so much blonde main character girl.

I definitely missed a lot of stuff here.

#slothcritic #she ra #she-ra #shera

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