#its gonna be a long one folks
Text
Fanfic Snippet
Decided to post the intro to a bg3 fanfic I'm writing. Will I ever finish? Who knows! But I have a lot more than this written already and I might post little parts of the story here from time to time. Features my Tav, name ((REDACTED)), Typical TavXAstarion brainrot, eventual smut, although this post is clean. Enjoy!
CW: Cursing, Mild Injury
______________________________________________________________
When she comes to, it’s to the sound of screeching metal and a high pitched, keening wail.
Then, before she has a chance to open her eyes, or at the very least string two thoughts together, her world turns sideways and her head collides into something firm and fleshy.
Bright lights snap into focus behind her eyelids, and she moans, wincing at the throbbing blast of pain that now radiates across her entire skull.
The keening noise stops, or at least dims, but tremors persist deep within the bowels of wherever the hells she’s ended up. She hesitates a moment to see if her head is split open. A cursory pass with her hand reveals no open wound, and she relaxes a fraction before peeking an eyelid open.
She shuts it almost immediately, takes a deep breath, and counts to five.
I’m dreaming, She thinks lightly, This is just a really terrible, fucked up dream, and when I open my eyes, I’ll be back in my bed in…” Her mantra fades as her brain searches fruitlessly for a memory no longer there.
Fuck.
It seems her head injury has done more than just give her a headache— it has also apparently knocked her memories clear into next week.
She scrubs at her face, pressing hard against her eyelids until patterns form in the darkness. Something squirms behind her eye at the pressure, and she gasps, eyes flying open of their own accord.
The nightmare hellscape beyond hasn’t changed, and now there was something wriggling around in her head.
Double fuck.
#bg3#bg3 fanfiction#tav#bg3 tav#fanfic#journal#brainrot#the brainrot is real#when I say I have written more I mean#im at 15k words and we haven't even reached the grove yet#its gonna be a long one folks#maybe too long?#featuring my dumbass tav#big golden retriever energy tho
4 notes
·
View notes
Photo
wizard looking for a way home (aka wizard of dark space)
#pokemon#swsh#champion leon#wizard leon babeyy!#thank u to cosme for hangin out with me while I figure this one out lol#this! is the piece I used for the ''speedpaint'' thingy btw. I'll try to put together the video over the next month or so#lol. usually when I make wizard leon designs I riff with what comes up and think abt like. maybe his affinity in this set#like ''oh he'd do fabric talismans. oh he'd levitate. he does poppet stuff''#that at most. but this. the moment I started fleshing this one out I was like#oh he's really lost. for a very long time. to the point he's learned so much he's forgotten what many of the things on his suit does#like lmao I guess I can Not be normal about any astronaut leon huh!! its chronic for me#I couldnt get to some of the questions folks asked with this one. so this video will probably not be comprehensive#but I'll make another when those things come up!!#fksjdfk sorry lads most of u guys asked abt colors but idk if this ones the best for that. its got a preddy concrete palette#guess I can save talking about the more insane color stuff for when that comes up too...#we'll see!! hope it's gonna happen#for now. one more wizard leon for the book. have a good night lads!#tie a yarn round ur wrist dont forget the way back
320 notes
·
View notes
Text
How do I explain the ways in which the bill origins fic 'A Romance of Many Dimensions' by haley3 rewired my brain without needing to give paragraphs upon paragraphs of context. The fic is something like 200,000 words long. Almost every single good moment calls back to things that are set up earlier in the fic
#godsrambles#girl help 'the colors in our universe are the same as the ones in his home dimension because our universe is made out of a piece of bill'#makes NO sense without adding way more context#not to speak of 'bill is obsessed with ford because he can Feel the same cosmic thread connecting them as the one that drew him towards-#-meeting his henchmaniacs which makes him convinced against all odds that ford is gonna join him'#and the long beginning is set in flatland. its what finally got me to read the book flatland#and now I will literally think to myself 'its not that i Have to do x or y tasks. i GET to do x or y tasks isnt that great'#'i get to live in a physical form that experiences so many vivid thoughts and sensations while on bills favorite planet in the multiverse'#and i will be like 'why should i drag my feet about learning this or doing that. bill was literally trapped in a 2d world-'#'and KILLED to be able to experience a life as 3d and colorful as the one im in'#'and just like bill was so desperate to learn and see and do Everything that the axolotl gave him a ton of power so he could do that.'#'i Also want to learn and do and see everything i possibly can. and i literally HAVE the chance to do that'#'so i'd better start actually Trying to do and see and learn everything i can'#and then i brush my teeth slightly more often or whatever#fucking unhinged and ridiculous way of getting myself to do tasks#the events of this fic arent even my headcanon for bills powers and backstory. i just think its neat!#and now my brain has been permanently rewired by a got dam fan fic.#anyways sorry for all the spoilers but i mean. i doubt many folks would decide to read a fic that long without being intrigued by spoilers#most frustrating thing is that the hard hitting spoilers SEEM understandable without context.#but i promise there is a lot of context missing that makes it make sense why they are good plot points and not just weird random happenings#edit: its 200000 words not 600000. how did I misread that
16 notes
·
View notes
Text
awww basketball again
#malkin#tanger where is your penguin hat#oh wait dallas is a few days ago this must be old#i do appreciate how even though geno wears expensive sweaters and shit#his favorite hat is still just a 50$ trucker cap from a historically high quality but relatively affordable hat shop#its just cute: rich famous hockey celebrity but still just geno#When i bought my first go*orin hat i must have gone into the shop at least twice if not three times trying to decide which one i wanted#I had just gotten my first job in LA and Old Town pas is one of those Fancy shopping districts so i felt very awkward and out of place#and jenn had to go with me to drag me into the shop i was so nervous#And she tried on a bunch of the hats with me cause shes nice like that#Anyway yeah the folks in go*orin were real nice to us which if you have ever been into botique shops in LA you will know thats unusual#Most of the time they are rude assholes especially if you dont look like you are going to spend any money#I did buy a hat it was a little directors cap like the one walt wore in the 20s before he went into his porkpie phase#I do not like porkpie hats i will never wear one of those LOL#But i was determined to have a directors cap because if i was here in LA living the dream i was gonna look the part#I was still optimistic about things back then#Weirdly enough when i got my second job a month later the hat became a thing because it turned out everyone at the studio wore hats lol#I fit right in#And then the pandemic happened and suddenly nobody was going into the office at all for a very long time :(
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#it doesnt feel like im ever going to be okay again. like this is just how its going to be forever#and i dont know how long i can bear it.#anyway. having a rough one lately folks. and dont think its possible to get what i need to fix it.#how much of this is depression and how much is burnout + realisation that its always gonna be like this? who knows. but im stuck in it#someone pleeeeease come take care of me for a week and take some responsibilities n decisions off my shoulders so i can rest#and also hold me. please i beg you#anyway. thanks if you read all that. sorry for being miserable.#post
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
here are my thoughts:
Rooster, Phoenix and Bob (maybe Payback and Fanboy too?) are in a metal band together (music genre may change... but as long as it stays within rock/metal)
Rooster: Guitar (lead), singer, piano, drums,
Phoenix: Singer (lead), bass(lead), violin
Bob: Drummer (lead), singer, harmonica
Payback: Guitar, singer, bass
Fanboy: Bass, piano,
Hangman is a sports jock, but closeted metalhead (probably Coyote too)
Additional: Goose, Mav and Carole were in a little band together. Goose dies in an accident, Carole stops doing music professionally, Mav joins band with Ice and Slider and others from the 86 crew?
#shrugs#carole may have quit music after goose died but she still sings to bradley#goose played guitar and he had a guitar he had a stupid relationship with#rooster inherits said guitar and its real special for him#mav gives it to him when he gets older/when he tells mav he and bob and phoenix are gonna do music for real#mav was a singer and bassist i think#the crazy kind#ice was mainly a singer#slider....... drummer#shrugs again#rooster has the heavy/folk metal vibe: long hair#phoenix is a mix of metal and... punk?#hmmmm#bob has the mohawk (but not the one where it skinned on the sides cause no)#hangman is just sports jock but sees rooster perform once and instant heart eyes#if anybody mentions eddie munson im gonna take your kneecaps#love eddie but enough#anyway
21 notes
·
View notes
Text
So I decided a little bit ago that my goal for the FWIW was to try to reach 75,000 words (it's not as short as I originally wanted the project to be but would still be shorter than EWG was).
I've slowly been plugging away at Chapter 10 (aka the last chapter) and just recently crossed 74,000 words...the first scene (there's three total) isn't even done yet...😬😯
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
heehee oh yeah i'm so marrying this guy again today <333333
#the longer im sitting here feeling so many feelings about charlie and our two month anniversary the more im sure of it <3#i was already planning on it but boy it just feels right today <3#you may ask 'ren. if youve already married charlie. how are you gonna marry him again'#and to that i say that i can marry him as many times in my heart as i want to <3 sjkflds#also when we first got married we had been dating for 4 DAYS so. things have changed a lot since then FJDSKL#it's so within his character for that to happen tho ajfklds#he proposed to someone without even dating once#i mean she said no but still ajfkdsl#at least at that point we'd known each other for a long while JDKSL#even so i just wanna marry him again so i can reassert what he means to me <3#and recommit and remember why i picked him as my one and only in the first place <3#i mean it's not like i've forgotten#but i want to keep remembering. i want to work hard to keep us this in love. this devoted#and i feel like it's something charlie would love!! the idea of just making each other promises again#it'd make him feel more secure and also give him an excuse to be extra lovey dovey which he loves to be <3#plus its romantic! and we're both hopeless romantics!#he just means everything to me. and i wanna keep it that way <3#ren speaks#renlie#im gushing out here folks
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
chapter 3 of refuge is at 1k words 💪💪
#writing#fanfic writing#lowk by accident like#most of my writing is around 1k words#and i was just worldbuilding and then i looked at the word count and shat myself#its gonna be a long one folks. (long by my standards ok i know some ppl write like 10k words while i have adhd and im out of my meds)
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
"❤️"
#dash commentary#i just got home#and i just sat down#and i just finished stuffing 6 slices of pizza down my face hole after an 8 hr shift with no breaks#am here#am there#am everywhere#am gonna get to lvl 24 today on hsr#also naoe loves his naotora and the trust they have in each other#is just perfect#no ones gonna get in between them folks#its beautiful#these tags got long
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
i would honestly rather rewatch the same show with even half decent gay rep a million times than watch any lgbtq centric show where they all end up sad and traumatized at the end. i want the gay people to be HAPPY i get enough of how depressing is can be to be queer in real life i want the shows i watch to be a way to get away from that.
#this is about young royals. i honestly cant stand that show i cant do angst yall not unless there's also lots of fluff and a happy ending#if im gonna consume queer media then it's going to be happy bc i dont want to keep being told that being gay is always accompanied by misery#i GET that being queer bring about its own set of struggles and that the country i live in has been consistently hurting queer and trans#folks for YEARS. when i watch a show that's not what i want to be thinking about. i think about that shit all the time any time i do anythin#remotely related to my queer/transness. i cant not think about it. so when i finally find a show that has obvious representation of people#like me i really need it to be uplifting and happy. i understand shows need conflict#but i would really rather the conflict be about something other than the fact that the character is gay for once#it tires me out dude#this is why i like ofmd and heartstopper so much#the problems in ofmd and NOT because of their queerness and no one hates any character because they are homosecual or trans. they just dont#and heartstopper. although the main conflict is that nick doesnt feel able to come out for a while and charlie is bullied for being mlm#it still gives them a happy ending. and there are conflicts OUTSIDE of their queerness (tao and charlie's friendship. charlies mental health#) so it doesnt feel as horrible for me to watch bc they're able to find joy in each other and their friends and rhey still have safe spaces#and not everyone is constantly mad at everyone. it just feels less depressing. its a happy show and they get to be happy about being gay.#anyways. rant over sorry yall just needed to get that out of my system#long story short i dont like sad gay shows#dipshitposts
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
ok anyway im leaving in. the day after tomorrow at like 2am so im just saying its tomorrow cause im literally just gonna stay up till then theres no point in sleeping. BUT two things. one i need to finish packing. my clothes are dry so i just have to bring them upstairs and pack. sort of stressed out bc like. i like my outfit i dont want to change it but everyones telling me its too hot for a leather jacket like i know!!!! but its my jacket :(
anyway i just have to do that so ill do it now and then…on top of that i wanted to get the draft for my ghost story done but i havent been working on it at all >_< ive just been reading comics the past couple days. so tomorrow. for sure. i will definitely work in getting the draft done totally.
but ugh im kind of nervous i havent seen these people in so long and im not great socially. also i dont go on trips in general so like. i hope i have energy for a full month yknow. i have a tendency of isolating myself when im stressed out but i dont have any space to do that…not that i should but whatever you know
#LIKE. im just eugh like im Bad at small talk. im better at dispensing information and leaving it that#or listening. ive been practicing listening a lot more so i dont overtalk and everyone gets a turn#OH RIGHT!!!! i hope. cause i have 4 cousins. two are toddler age#one is a little younger than me so like 13 but hes a boy idk how he is cause he might be annoying no offense <3#and then an older girl whos around my brothers age so a few years older. and we never rlly talked cause it was always my brorher and her#last i saw them i was like. god idk it couldnt have been too young cause i got black out drunk before i stayed with them#so. 11? 12? definitely younger than 13 i know for a fact#im bad with times tho#anyway its been a while and im a lot older now. so i hope shes there so we can talk and be friends idk#apparently my brother isnt close to her anymore? he called her a bitch last time we talked abt her so. hope i do see her#and my aunt! i always liked her a lot and my brothers prob gonna be busy with our uncle. ill be stuck with the younger kids but thats ok i#dont mind since im used to handling my sister. apparently theyve wanted to meet me for a long time so i am super excited#i dont think anyones gonna expect what i look like tho lol i dont think anyone could have guess me being punk#not even me like i distinctly remember in elementary my friend. we were talking about mcr and emo / punk stuff and he was like. you coukd#never be like that. ummmmm well guess what dickhead!!!! jokes were actyally still close lol#ANYWAY i am fucking excited and nervous and have to find a normal way to bring up 18th century fashion or perhaps history of contemporary#folk
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
have to put it somewhere but in the last 5 years 3 seperate groups of people have decided im the villain and never told me why just iced me out and isolated me and in 2/3 cases i dont think i actually /did/ anything i think its a mix of antiblackness, ableism, and that ive seen them/know that they hurt other ppl very badly.
group 1 was someone who i used to consider a best friend but who soft cut me off when i disliked a partner of theirs, then, when they decided to hate that now ex, they pushed for their ostricization and 'took me back' without apologizing. they refuse to make eyecontact with me and their partner now flatout ignores my existence, even though i literally was the olive branch for this friend to almost every community theyre successful in now (not that they owe me shit for that), and i think its bc im still close w another Black/mixed friend of mine who they hate now bc they called them out on their antiblackness (which they give excuses for why their nonblack ass can get away with it). this person notoriously throws people out and claims 'villain' when ppl get upset at how they treat others as so cruelly disposable, and ive seen it up close and personal even before it was me and i think that also plays into why they treat me lkke this now.
2nd group was my exes friends who only knew me when i was a self destructive alcoholic. i was loud and obnoxious and yeah i had shrapnel (never abusive), but they decided covid, year 3 of my sobriety, that id never changed, ramped up my exes resentment at me for the alcoholic years even after they said theyd forgiven me and were proud of how far id come, and were instrumental in the breakup if that 5 year relationship. even though one of those friends was literally also sober, they just couldnt forgive me for ever having been an alcoholic, i was just worse than all of them i guess.
3rd is a current happening. someone i knew from god 9 years ago, again who i invited into the community when they were new in town (see a pattern?) had their white friend LIE ABOUT NOT ONLY KNOWING ME BUT ME MAKING HER FEEL 'UNSAFE' (IVE NEVER MET THIS WOMAN), to kick me out of a discord all my friends are in, and when ppl challenged that initially, this person had the gall to say that i made them uncomfy, to the point for a while they wouldnt go to POC events i was at. this person who took the side of 2 white boys who isolated me at 19 bc one of them led me on then dated my ex bf (they didnt have to like me, i was FPing the guy, but the isolation and all my friends picking their side still sucked), and then this person went on to be sexually inappropriate and preassurey and crossing boundaries w multiple friends at this point. but i cant hang out where my friends r bc i make this person uncomfy. i think theyre scared id 'out' them as predatory or something (wouldnt w/o permission of vics obvi) and so they paint me as the villain first
and like if i did something wrong let me know so i can leave y alone and fix it (like i did getting sober going to therapy getting on meds ect) im invested in not hurting ppl. but i dont think i ever /actually/ hurt any of these ppl, i think they just benefit from me not being around and are willing to lie and exclude and ostricize to get it. and ik that sounds conspiratory but like. fuck.
#its been so long and ive tried to be nothing but kind to folks#i try rly hard to be a good persob#i feel fucking insane#i feel like im going fucking insane#is anyone gonna stand up for me or am i actually evil andnjust never noticed#abd evetyone knowz#abs they only keep me ae9und bc im entertaining#or a good therapist#or they know ill ride or die and they knownthey may need tonuse that one day#this sounds so self pitying#i promise ik the times i have majorly fuckdf up#there r ppl who dont speak to md for good reason and i respdct rhat and leave them alone#we were all fucked up traumatizdd kids#i just dont think these cases are those#fuck#life and times
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
im terrified to turn 18 next year but also i basically just confirmed with one of my best friends that we're gonna find an apartment together and be roommates so suddenly the future doesn't seem too horrible
#we both hate the idea of living alone rn and neither of us are moving out of the state just yet so we're gonna live together#that way we can split the rent and save up our money for whatever we wanna do#im taking at least a year long break after i get outta high school before i even THINK about going to college bc otherwise ill die i think#and she might also be taking a break before she goes to college#so it'll all work out :')#only issue is that this is the girl im kind of confused abt because i cant tell if im crushing on her or if its just platonic#so this might complicate things. but whatever#she's one of my best friends first and foremost and being roomates will be nice#bonus points for us bc it's gonna be a household of trans folks lmao#we still gotta talk about logistics and all that and we still don't know how its gonna work out but#im happy#even if i get kicked out by my mom the second i turn 18 i know ill have a friend who ill be able to get a place with#i have to find a job asap but i dont think it'll be too crazy hard#my soon to be roommate is begging me to join her at the grocery store she works at and my brother is begging me to work with him at an -#- escape room#so im probably just gonna join one of them soon bc i can#also im planning on taking my drivers permit test next week which is. kind of terrifying but i need to learn how to drive#the public transport here is alright but it just doesn't cut it sometimes so i need to know how to get around via car
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
i shouldnt be planning my next piercing while not-having-my-sober-mind PLEASE
#whoops ive made the tags way too long agian read at your own risk <3 ;P#i want a second lobe so bad but....#'im currently not able to be responsible for myself' or whatever :/#argharghargh#ill look at it again tomorrow >:(#no bc getting only one lobe is such a waste of time i should at least get another piercing somewhere........#argh#listen imma get my second lobe. im pretty confident of that rn. but what else..... thats the question.#a second second lobe?? maybe a surface piercing on my hand like noiz??? EYEBROW????? ANTI-EYEBROW!!!?!?!?!??1#hrmmm#i need to think this through tomorrow or summ but i wanna plan rn this is so unfair >:(#sillyposting#same kinda thing but ive been thinking about a next tattoo and i know its gonna cover some scars but they should probs be a year or older :#which will be soon enough luckely but....#anyway the plan i have rn is the MOST basic icarus tattoo bc he was the MC of the first book i loved and <33#i think itd fit well but i have to be able to get it first#literally the most popular result of 'icarus tattoo' is the exact pose it want and its a tad bit emberassing but thats my guy alr.#thousands of folk probs have this exact pose but IM DIFFERENT OKAY.'#anyway he'll be reaching for the sun which rays are stippled/gradiented out#and the sun will only be a semicircle bc i wanna fit the head of the snake along my back/shoulders i have planned in there#its gonna look dope but i gotta at least wait till 2024 bc i dont actually know how old the scars i wanna cover are :P#wait thats actually so crazy ive been sh free for 6+ months wth.#somewhat atleast#not to say it hasnt been hard since uni started but thats still something!!!#YIPPEE#alr off to sleep (aka doomscrolling social media i wont interact with)#argh nvm i have a dentist app. at 8 tomorrow >:(#maybe i should sleep.....
0 notes
Note
little sad bitchy!reader moment: her and rafe are at the country club with topper and kelce and some other friends of rafe and one of the guys starts saying how she would be a horrible wife and mother (bc of the way she is) and she honestly is so hurt by it and i think she would almost try to change the way she is around rafe a little just so he wouldn’t think that about her…
sobbing thinking about it and listening to this (https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTLX2Pdcv/)
hi my love this was so amazing and wonderful to write! im sorry its kinda long, hope you like it ♡
in all honestly, you stopped caring what people said about you a long time ago. you weren't the way you were because it was funny, or to get a reaction out of others. that was just the way you've always been, and there was nothing you hated more than letting people walk all over you and get away it.
that must be why the comebacks would fly out of your mouth before you could stop them, if you even wanted to stop them. why you never stopped to think twice about the people who didn't want to talk to you again or the boys who didn't want a second date.
you weren't easy to handle, not that you wanted to be, but you knew you weren't.
it seemed easy enough for rafe though.
he never seemed to wish that you'd bite your tongue or tell you to act differently, behave a certain way. no, he'd laugh and fire back something, or agree with you and say something you remember to add to your collection of insults.
rafe liked you as you were. that's why he fought so long and hard to get you, something that you didn't take lightly. you were committed, and the more days that went by, you found yourself softening up more and more with him.
rafe knew a side of you that a select few had ever seen, much less engaged with. you liked it this way, having a boyfriend you could be yourself around and be a little soft around.
until you overhear a boy at the club talking about you. in all your years of life, you've never let a boy make you feel upset, and you didn't want to start now. a comeback brews the second he mentions your name—of course it's the idiot one, the one whose parents pay for his grades and doesn't know anything besides losing at pong and scaring away girls—but it dies in your throat when you hear the words that follow.
"i mean i get it, she's hot, but i don't know how cameron puts up with her."
"what're you talking about? she's just like him," kelce says, and you feel briefly grateful for him.
"dude, she's a bitch. i've never heard one nice thing come out of her mouth. totally untamed. you can't bring a girl like that home to your folks, they'd hate her. especially his folks. and don't even mention long-term. imagine coming home after working all day and your girl is bitching at you? i mean, no offense but what kind of kids is she gonna raise?"
you hear laughter, and when your face feels wet, and you're confused for a moment. you look up at the ceiling, wondering if there's a leak, when your eyes flood again and more tears fall down.
crying, and that too over what one of rafe's friends said about you. this isn't like you. frankly, it's pathetic. those idiotic boys don't know the first thing about you or your relationship with rafe—they don't know the conversations you have and all the things you both agree on and the way he laughs when you fire back at him.
but somehow, feet leading you outside and to your car, fingers texting rafe some excuse for why you went home early, you end up letting it affect you.
rafe comes over the next morning—he texted you something but you didn't reply. worried for a moment about something you've never been concerned with before, you think a nicer girl would have texted him back right away, that you should have texted him back.
he doesn't knock, never does. your parents aren't home but he has your spare key, letting himself in and up to your room. he stops at the doorway, leaning against the frame.
"hey. what happened last night?" he asks it like he doesn't know what happened—which is good, you want it to stay that way. the thing you would have said yesterday bubbles up, coming to your lips. maybe if you'd gotten your head out of your ass, you'd see my text.
"wasn't feeling good. came home."
"you feelin' okay now?" he gets closer to you, and you look up at your boyfriend. i'd be fine but that asshole you already hate ruined my mood. will you run him over in your truck?
"better." you stop for a moment, you don't want him to think something's wrong. "how was your night?" he looks at you a little confused.
"it was fine. borin' without you. kelce asked where you went too."
"y'know i always liked kelce," you say, smiling again. you think you can get better at this.
rafe takes you out for lunch, and then you wanted to go shopping in the afternoon and get your nails done. it's a whole day, and you like spending it with him. you swallow down what your mind usually thinks and opt for being nice instead, polite questions and trepid commentary.
the waiter brings you the wrong drink—and though you're not so much of a bitch to hurl insults at teenager servers, you're normally annoyed enough to say something and get your correct drink. instead you sip it quietly, waiting for rafe to start the conversation. when you don't, he looks at you in that confused way again.
"you okay?"
"yeah. fine. you okay?"
if he thinks something's wrong, he doesn't say anything. at the mall, nothing looks how you want and even the things you like don't feel right. you'd let rafe buy you whatever you want, normally giving him a twirl in the dressing room and thanking him very sweetly.
"you want that dress?" rafe asks, his arm resting on a rack while you comb through mindlessly.
"no, it was too short."
"that's never been an issue before." ha-ha. pervert. looking up my skirt aren't you? knew you were desperately horny for me but this is down bad even for you.
"trying to dress better. and it'll be cold soon."
"hey, look at me." rafe uses his hands on your shoulders to turn you from the clothes, facing him. "you okay baby?"
fuck, you know you messed up. he only calls you that when he's being serious—the rest of the time it's princess, angel, sweetheart. all things that you are definitely not.
"i'm okay. i just don't want it. but thank you." you don't know it, but he thinks you're upset with him, spending the next hour in the nail salon racking his mind for the reason why.
your nails are fine, they look pretty enough. shorter than normal with a clean french manicure, you admire them from a distance. you suddenly feel like crying again, wondering why you didn't get the pink acrylics you like, rhinestones and bows and all the other things that were pretty to look at when you flipped people off.
in rafe's passenger seat after, you keep staring at your hands, feeling another tear slip down. rafe's not looking at you, he's looking ahead, still unsure what was going on.
"baby, if i did something you gotta tell me, i don't like seein' you like this-" when he turns his head to glance at you, you're looking back at him with your pouty face and wet cheeks—two things he's never seen before. "hey. what's wrong?"
you couldn't stop the downpour if you tried—tears falling quick and fast. you hate that anyone's seeing you like this, especially rafe.
rafe is nice to you, and you soften up around him. you didn't really realize that he softens up around you too. he wipes your tears away, keeps a hand on yours the whole time.
"can you talk to me? what's goin' on?"
"yesterday.. one of those guys said that i was a bitch-"
"which one? to your face? when? i'll fuckin' kill him-"
"no, he didn't know i was there. it's not that, i know i am. i don't care about that. he said that-" your voice cracks, something else you hate, that you don't want rafe hearing. "sorry. he said you couldn't bring me home. and that you would hate coming home to me-me being all mean. and that our kids would be mean too."
yes, you're mean. but rafe's mean too, and none of your friends have ever said anything like that about him. you like that he's mean, that he's like you—you think he's the closest thing to a soulmate you could ever find.
"don't fuckin' listen to any of them for a second, got it? they don't know anything."
"rafe, i-"
"no, seriously. they yap because i wasn't there to knock him out. and he says it when you're gone 'cause he knows you'd make him cry if you were there." you sniffle, though you already feel better.
"but i didn't. i started crying instead." you hate even thinking about it.
"s'okay, it happens. but don't believe a word of that shit. i wanna come home to you everyday. hear everything you say. i want all of it."
"really?" you ask him, wiping away your tears, appreciating the hand on your thigh and how sincerely he's looking at you. "i thought you'd be mean if i cried in front of you."
"it's hard enough to be mean to you."
"you're such a sap. should we go get ice cream and braid each others hair after this?" he laughs, and you laugh. "thanks rafey."
"no problem, kid."
"don't call me that." rafe groans, and you smile.
1K notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
bluedawnart
my tablet costs 20 bucks
hihihihioo
Untitled
londongrumblr
London Grumblr
pgworks
PGworks