Who’s gonna be the one tell him it’s too cold to go outside in his backpack

I’ve never properly watched the sturniolo triplets, but they seem really funny <3

Hope your burger was nice, you deserve the world and a yummy burger

I’m just getting a little sleepy now, but I don’t have to be up for nine, so I might just put my headphones in and listen to some music and try to fall asleep 💤

NOTE - I HAVE BEEN DRINKING WATER, BUT NIW THERE ARE LOADS OF A) DROUGHT WARNINGS AND B) WATER SHORTAGES AND C) MORE HEAT AND LESS RAIN grrrr

My airpod is about to die, so I’m gonna switch and hopefully even out the damage on my ears!

Night night <3 (hopefully)

My phone is about to die so I’m going to send this now before I loose it - love you and speak to you in the morning / whenever that is for you - probably like 2am. Let’s say your morning, my afternoon then

they are pretty funny but sometimes it gets awkward because like they would just be fighting and I’m just like shut the fuck up :DDD it reminds me of when me and my siblings would fight 😭

it was okay! it could’ve been better 🫢 but no you deserve the world!!! 😽💞 and some yummy sleep!! 😽😴

good about the water!! continue to drink water as it gets hotter! my state is always in a drought, so you can be conservative on water by taking shorter showers, but I say still drink the amount and more of water that you need to drink every day! you wouldn’t want to accidentally be dehydrated and be in a heat wave :( no no. (I don’t know if I’m using the word conservative right)

The next week for me is going to be extremely hot :( like i’m talking 106F degrees for two days which is 41C and my god, im going to die. tomorrow is it going to be 104F which is 40C. and for the other hot days is going to reach to 100F which is 37C. I don’t know if you can tell but I live in a hot state. And it doesn’t rain here. 😅

I love wearing earbuds!! ig. it’s just comfortable sometimes. but yeah. i’m gonna listen to music right now!! <333 dude I always get like warnings from my phone to turn down my volume, and I would be like no I’m just gonna put in the other earbud 😭 But I hate it when I would put one in and it’s like right about to die :(

goodnight 😽💞😴 (sweet dreams mauh <3)

why haven’t you been charging your phone? I love you!! 💞 and please do talk to me in the morning! I have school tomorrow so yeah, i’m pretty sure that my morning is your afternoon while my afternoon is your night, around 2/3 pm for me, is midnight for you.. tomorrow you gotta tell me what time it is for you in the morning cuz it would be seven when i wake up.. I honestly don’t think were that many hours off.

7:45 pm for me, i’m guessing it’s like three for you rn. (you said it was 2:50 am at first an hour ago) so 7, 8 9 10 11 12, 1 2 3 = nine hours… i think. I might be wrong. Time is such a weird concept man. because time is man-made, time is not real.

wtf 🤯

Greetings from a sunny Bar-sur-Aube, where the temperature is 29c and rising.

Along with most of Europe and the UK we had extremely hot weather at the beginning of the week, temperatures of over 40c, I hate having my shutters closed and the feeling of being “cooped up”, but opening a door was like feeling the heat from an oven! It was difficult to sleep at night with temperatures in the high 20’s, windows were opened in the hope that any little breeze would enter. I can’t say it is all over now, we are due 33c today, so still rather warm.

When I moved in here three years ago, I was so pleased to have a garden. It was really a “life saver” during Covid, giving me somewhere to retreat to, taking in the fresh air. That first year I grew a cherry tomato, a pepper and a chilli plant, the tomato was the success story. This year I have two tomato plants (different types) have had broad beans and a few peas, raspberries, strawberries, beetroot, lettuce, radish, rosemary and thyme. I have done some remodelling, had the gardener remove some huge shrubs and had a patio laid in the rear and a terrace in the front. I am so happy with it all. I was taking care of the grass until this heatwave which has burnt the self heal and white clover. The “grassed area” left in the front is tinder dry and the only things growing are weeds. I don’t water these “grassed” areas, water is too precious a commodity to use spraying grass. I am looking for ways to retain moisture in the earth by mulching, I have a composter which I have started using again and I need to riddle some compost to use as mulch. I may not be a great gardener, but I do try.

This week saw the first birthday of my grandson, I really cannot wait to see the “little chap” again! Of course, I am looking forward to seeing his sister too. “The Daddy” also celebrated his birthday, so birthday cake on two days for that family.

I had an appointment with the podiatrist, she made me feel like I was walking on air again, that feeling didn’t last long, as the following day I stubbed my little toe and throughout the day the pain was increasing, next morning, surprise, surprise a beautiful bruised toe!

When the heat dropped to the low 30’s I started knitting again….. finished a hat for a baby and knitted another pair of bootees which match a hat I had knitted previously. Knitting workshop was cancelled as there was some “emergency”.

Friday evening, saw me in town for the 48th Nocturne Cycliste, I went to the bar, and was able to keep dashing to the barrier as the cyclistes came around. I met an English family whose son was competing, he was number 22 so it made it more interesting to look out for him. Unfortunately, I left just before the end. My car was parked in an area which doesn’t have a lot of “activity” in the evening and I didn’t want it to be too dark when I was walking along there.

“The Paralegal” has just messaged to say he had watched Rick Stein having andouillettes in Troyes and then it was the Hairy Bikers at the Pont du Gard, we so enjoyed that holiday in Nîmes, when we visited the Pont du Gard and the Haribo factory in Uzes.

I did laugh to myself, yesterday, when I read the TV paper for the coming week. One evening there is a documentary on about Nausicaa in Boulogne-sur-Mer, we took the “boys” there in about 2000, we saw all there was to see and just before we left, their father was eager for them to come and see the rays in the tank. Behind us there was a display which contained rather a lot of ropes and when I looked around the boys were trying to tie one another up with said ropes. Asked outside Nausicaa later, what was the best part of the visit, both boys agreed it was the ropes 😂😂.

An excerpt from “A July Day” by Eben Eugene Redford

In idle mood, this happy day,

I let the moments drift away;

I lie among the tangled grass

And watch the crinkling billows pass

I may get to see the French F1 (on tv) this afternoon, I also wanted to watch the Tour de France afterwards BUT I would like to go to the cinema to see Elvis……..decisions, decisions!

Jusqu’à la semaine prochaine

love(sick) girl | katsuki bakugo

ೃ  your planned birthday surprise for katsuki takes a turn for the worst when you’re suddenly struck by a cold, prompting your dynamite boyfriend to take care of you and shower you with love and affection on his special day.

ೃ pairing: katsuki bakugo x fem! reader

ೃ  tags: tooth-rotting fluff, established relationship, college au

ೃ warnings: strong language and slightly suggestive themes

ೃ  my nav  →  my mha masterlist  → ongoing 1.1k event! 

happy birthday to our favorite explosive cutie! this boy means sm to me and i just had to post a fic! i hope you guys enjoy!  ​ ♡

"Oi oi oi oi (Y/N)."

Katsuki comes home to see you teetering on the edge of the living room couch, in your hoodie and joggers ensemble, tissue boxes sprawled about the coffee table, and a small white basin filled with hot water on the floor.

“Ssshuki-kun!” You chirp, jerking up from the couch. Your voice nasally and trying your best to hide your terrible cold by sniffing in the sinus in your nose as much as you can. “You’re back h-home eareeely! Happy birfdaaay babie!” You shoot your boyfriend finger guns and sway your arms to the sides, trying to not act suspicious. “Whhfat abot our dhiinner plans w-with the s-squaddd? Kiri! Mina! Denki! Serohh!”

Before you could even blink your eyes and hope he doesn’t notice your painfully obvious cold and fever, your boyfriend instantly knew something was amiss. and suddenly, it felt as if Katsuki teleported in front of you, his hand on your temples, and then swishing it’s way to your neck to check your temperature. “(Y/N)...” You have a high fever.” He says sternly and in a very concerned tone. 

You look up at him, your head a bit woozy and your blonde lover holding you gently by the arms for support. “Noh! Noh! Noh! I p-planned this dinner 1 month in advance just for you! M-my f-fever can wait! I-it’s a micheeelin star restaurant! Y-you’re ggoing to lurv it babe!” Your legs wobble and you practically fall down the floor if it weren’t for Katsuki holding you in his arms. He grabs you by the hand and plops you back down on the couch, your mouth forming into a little pout.

“C’mon. I’ll help you wash up.” He gingerly helps you up from the couch again, snaking an arm around your shoulder, your weight relying on him as he brings you to the bathroom door.

“B-but it’s michelin!!! I’ve alhways whanted sho take you der!” You whine, crocodile tears welling up in your eyes, further worsening your cold. 

“The michelin restaurant can wait.” He deadpans, using his free hand to open the bathroom door. “What are you feeling right now?”

“I f-feel liek absholute shite!” You flash him a thumbs up, Katsuki holds back a disgruntled laugh at your attempt to lighten up the mood. “My head hurts, my temperature read 40c, i really wanna rest but it’s your birthdaaay! we gots to celebrate!”

“(Y/N). I would rather want to see you acting like a weird-ass drunk after a girls’ night out than to see you frail and about to collapse from sickness just because you want to push through with our birthday dinner plans. It’s okay. Those can wait. I want to see my girl feel well again so we can celebrate the hell out of my birthday.” He grabs your hand and strokes your thumb, planting a kiss on your feverish forehead. “Take a quick shower. Make sure the temperature is normal and wrap yourself in a towel as soon as you can. I’ll help you dry up. While you do that, I’m going to make some chicken soup and heat up a fever patch.” 

You grab him by his collar, Katsuki immediately shifts to a very confused and bewildered expression as you creep up at him, whispering in his ear. 

“W-what if we take a shower together?” 

“Fuck no.”

“A-ah!? WhyyYyyy!?”

“Because you’re sick.” He responds before you can protest against him. “I can’t risk the both of us getting sick like this. Now, get inside. I’ll leave your favorite pajamas by the door and just.. call me if you ever need help.”

“I LOAF YOUUuUu! SsHuKI-KUN!” You blow him air kisses, making your entrance to the bathroom. 

“Yea yea.” He replies, turning his heel away to make a beeline to the kitchen, a small smile forming on his face as soon as he turns away from you.

“I love you too.”

10 minutes.

 It only took you 10 minutes to wash up and for you to feel a little bit better than the state you were in several minutes ago.. You wrap a bath towel around your head, slowly slipping in your nightwear. 

Breathing a sigh of relief, you leave the bathroom to be wonderfully surprised by Katsuki sitting on the couch, waiting for you. Chicken soup and a cup of tea on the table, Netflix on with your favorite show playing, and to complete the mood, your boyfriend looking as handsome and striking as always.

What did you do in your past life to deserve such a brash and abrasive yet caring boyfriend?

“C’mere.” He gestures you to sit in between his legs. You blush at the thought but quickly recover before Katsuki could notice and tease you relentlessly about it. He unbinds the bath towel, revealing your damp (h/c) hair. 

He grasps onto the towel once again, kneads and rubs it from each side of your luscious locks to help it dry up easier. From the side of your vision, you could practically see Katsuki focus and put too much thought in this sweet and kind gesture 

“Isn’t it funny?” You spark up discussion, giggling to yourself. Your voice still a bit nasally but not as obvious as before. “It’s your birthday yet you’re here, taking care of me even though it’s supposed to be the other way around. This was supposed to be a special day for you.”

Katsuki breathes out an exasperated sigh, “Look (Y/N). Do you think I’d enjoy the dinner without you there? Of course not.” He stops drying your hair, placing the towel to let it dry by the side and beginning to reluctantly massage your temples, not knowing if this was the appropriate gesture. 

You coo wistfully as your muscles relax from Katsuki’s calloused yet big hands massaging your forehead, practically sending you off to blissful dreamland. “Probably? I ruined your day Suki-kun. I don’t deserve this love from you.” 

He halts from doing his affectionate gesture once again. You were about to turn to him and ask why he stopped so suddenly, until he unexpectedly picks you up from his lap so that you can face him and gaze in his starry crimson orbs. Your hands on his shoulders, propping yourself up so you can sit comfortably in his lap. 

“You know, you sound like a loser whenever you blabber about how you think we aren’t for each other? Damn it, (Y/N). As cheesy as it fucking sounds, you are my damn universe. My birthday is still complete as long as I can spend it with you.”

You giggle, wrapping your arms around his neck, trailing your hands and drawing ghost circles on the back of his neck. “Okay. That was cheesy even for you. Okay. okaaay. I’ll just reschedule the dinner then.”

He rolls his eyes, staring intently yet lovingly back at you. “So, you’re telling me now that your bitching and whining a while ago was for nothing?” He holds you by the waist, his strong hands wrapped around you, giving you the euphoric feeling of being safe in one’s arms. 

“Hey! Very rude of you to call that bitching!” You snap back, your boyfriend responding with a teasing smirk. “I’m sick! Give me a pass for that at least!”

There’s a momentary pause, the two of you still gazing lovingly at each other as Katsuki seals his lips to yours, you sigh at the feeling of rightness that flows through you.

“Happy birthday Katsuki-kun.”

taglist: @chibishae34​  @lovelytarou​​ @ramunegoddess​​, @serossimpy @laudthingcat​​​ @f0leysgurl​​

thinking about bill and tiger going on a winter road trip around the rural parts of europe. they take turns driving and eat at awful for you restaurants, go to all the cheesy tourist attractions, and a spontaneous mini golf sesh because tiger made a bet she could beat him. and once they get to their first stop, he goes in for a sweet kiss once they’re settled, but it naturally progresses into something more intimate. soft gasps, little giggles when he accidentally tickles her, and they have sex to the sound of the fireplace cracking.... brb gonna cry for a bit -🧚‍♀️

Ohhhhh bullseye, baby.

I don’t know if it’s just my Canadian side talking--we’re basically just a few chromosomes away from being polar bears--but there is something deeply engrained in me, something that really loves the winter. I am an autumn girl through and through, but something about winter is just...undeniably magical. Yes, sometimes it’s awful--the road conditions, the slippery sidewalks, the -40C, the 8 feet of snow that gets dumped on us weekly. But there’s also such a mysticism to it, a uniqueness, a lovely and serene quality.

There is the way that the bright snow illuminates a dark night--soft blankets just coating everything. It’s the way that it somehow makes everything much more quiet--most who have experienced cold winters can tell you that there is indeed silence that most of us associate with only the winter months, when the snow just seems to insulate everything and block out all echoes. A peacefulness. There’s the bright winter sky that is somehow just impossibly blue, a blue that you only see in January or February, and usually when the temperatures drop to insufferable degrees that no human should live through. The coldest days bring the brightest skies, and it’s a blue I’ve never seen anywhere else in the world. It’s the different kinds of snow that fall--soft and powdery, the type you want to just pelt at each other, or heavy and wet--the perfect kind for making a snowman.

Bill said a few years ago that the winters in Toronto were the coldest he had ever felt, and I felt some weird Canadian pride that we had successfully beaten a Nordic man into wintery submission. To boot--Toronto ain’t even all that cold compared to our prairie brethren. I wonder if he’s ever visited Landon in February.

In any case, despite its tribulations, winter holds a special place in my heart--and winter in Europe? Oh man. The November/December trip I took to Oslo and Copenhagen two years ago was the prettiest thing I had ever seen--Europe does cozy winter right. Everything is warm drinks, big knits, patios outside with heating lamps, blankets on chairs. It’s beautiful.

And maybe this trip is kind of her dream--but listen, for non-Europeans, driving in Europe can be terrifying, you know? I nearly get killed when I just try to cross the street on foot, let alone attempting to drive. But Bill grew up in these countries, traveled all over ‘em, and he’s more than fine with driving. Maybe he doesn’t even tell tiger the plan--he has a rough outline, but he keeps it secret. Tiger just thinks it’s the greatest thing, hitting the road in Europe with her big dude. He drives everywhere, confident and calm, through snowy mountains in a nice car, holding her hand. Maybe they start in France, drive on over to Switzerland. He rents a small room in a beautiful log cabin in the Alps, and it’s all fire place and cheese fondue and huge, fur blankets on the bed. They take a fondue tour. They hop on a beautiful scenic train that takes them around the country in a day. They go ice skating (he won’t let her ski, he’s not falling for that again). They drink mulled wine on their outdoor heated patio when they get back, all red noses and huddled together. They absolutely have sex under a blanket in front of the fire place, and it’s intimate and warm, both of their skin glowing in the soft light of the fire. The bed is huge, a big wooden frame complete with four posts, but they sleep glued to each other. He stuffs her silly, full of melty cheese fondue and raclette.

Maybe they head to Austria from there, he brings her to all the small pastry shops he knows of. He takes her prancing through the famous garden, takes her on a hot chocolate tour, gets enough chocolate snacks for the road. He brings her to Mozart’s house, introduces her to her first Mozartkugel, and he has to forbid her from eating anymore wiener schnitzel because she almost made herself sick. Maybe if it’s around Christmas time, he takes her to a few Christmas markets.

Then they head up to Germany, the whole time locked in an intense debate about glugg versus gluhwein--tiger can’t tell the difference, she just likes both but it’s very important, kid--maybe Bill has to stop along a few roads, let a herd of mountain goats go by. Even the ROADS are pretty in Europe. They stop for snacks in roadside restaurants and shacks, and god even the small motels along the way from country to country are just so beautiful. He takes her to all the German Christmas markets, hosts an elaborate mulled wine tasting (see tiger? glugg is so much better), feeds her bratwursts. Tiger is amazed that Bill can literally down an entire 1L stein of beer in just a few gulps, along with a pretzel the size of his face. In fact, maybe this time it’s tiger that has to intervene--Bill had 4 pretzels in a row and as he went for a fifth, she yanked him the other way. Got him a sausage on a stick instead, because somehow that’s better.

They head up to Scandinavia from there--a quick stop in Denmark, and that is entirely at tiger’s request. Bill’s Swedish side says fuck Denmark. But he takes her shopping on Stroget, tries to get her to properly pronounce stegt flæsk med persillesovs, maybe even takes her for a romantic stroll near Tivoli. Tiger makes the cardinal sin of mentioning that Danish Gløgg is her favourite so far and Bill almost like, smacks the mug out of her hands. They eat aebelskiver, and she laughs when he gets powdered sugar all over his nose. They stay a night or two in a beautiful little inn, before hopping back in the car.

Tiger loves that she’s just not worrying about anything. Bill knows how to gas up in Europe. He knows how the roads work. He knows how to park and read the parking signs. He knows where they can stop and get food, he knows where they can stay--tiger is just in the passenger seat, holding his big hand, and she’s glowing. He gets her a cute winter hat, a warmer pair of mittens when she’s cold. They pick up a few beautiful Christmas ornaments along the way, because the Christmas markets are just too beautiful not to.

They finally end back up in Sweden, but they’re not done yet. Bill drives way north into the countryside, where it’s dark all the time and where you can see the Northern Lights. He knows his way around--he rents a glass igloo for a few nights, gets a ski doo, drives her out to the middle of nowhere and parks it. The Northern Lights light up the entire sky, and tiger swears she’s never seen anything so beautiful in her life. She cries about it--god granny would have loved this. He hugs her and tells her to try to stop--wet tears on cold cheeks is never a good thing.

They sleep that night on their backs, still huddled together, watching the lights dance across the sky. He convinces her to try reindeer the next morning--tiger is a big fan of Christmas and eating reindeer just seems wrong--but it’s a pretty normal thing out there. She hates how much she loves it. And it’s a great way for him to reveal their next destination--none other than Santa Claus’ legit village, in Rovaniemi, Finland. Her squeal is so loud it nearly cracks the glass igloo.

Some planets

Description of some of the notable worlds surveyed by the Frontier vessel DSEV Soliton during its mission spinward along the Orion-Cygnus arm:

FEC 2953-CD5a: The only planetary-mass body orbiting a B-type star; possibly an abandoned superengineering project by an alien civilization. Remarkable only in that it is utterly unremarkable: the surface is extremely smooth and covered by a worldwide sea less than one meter deep, with virtually no variation in surface composition, albedo, or density of any kind. The atmosphere is entirely inert gases, mostly nitrogen and helium, with small amounts of various noble gases. No signs of life were found, and no tectonic activity.

The lack of cratering would suggest that the surface of CD5b is extremely young - Surveyor-Xenologist Kulnai has also posited some kind of alien asteroid defense mechanism, but no indication of alien technology was found on the surface or in orbit. However, Surveyor-Astronomer Harlon has also pointed out that no asteroid-mass objects orbit CD5b’s parent star except very close in, with the vast majority of orbiting mass consisting of a fine dust of minerals and ice particles, and that under such circumstances, the only possible impactors would be rare extrastellar objects. Surveyor-Planetologist Yun insists that there is no reason to think the planet is not simply a rare natural phenomenon, a remark which caused such controversy that Surveyors Tal and Uparan were forced to send Kulnai, Harlon, and Yun to their quarters and to forbid further discussion of the question except in private logs.

FEC 2968-R3He: A small, rocky world with a highly eccentric orbit, probably of extrastellar origin. A surface exploration drone indicated that beneath the shallow regolith, the planet is a single immense piece of diamond, possibly ejected from the core of a massive gas giant. On visiting the surface, Surveyor Yun sarcastically proposed to Surveyor Harlon, who surprised everyone by accepting; in consequence of the impending nuptials, the planet has been provisionally designated Harlon’s Engagement Ring.

FEC-2991-PHKc: A world with a dense atmosphere rich in hydrogen and methane. While PHKc has a diverse microbial biosphere, it also appears to be undergoing its own Great Oxygenation Event, with exposed iron deposits having recently reached a point of saturation that can no longer absorb the excess O2 generated by marine life. Oxygen blooms in the small, shallow seas trigger massive periodic fires that sweep over much of the planet, which will presumably continue until the hydrogen and methane in the atmosphere are depleted; the burning of hydrogen in particular will likely cause the seas to grow substantially, possibly creating a true planetwide ocean.

FEC-3030-59Jd II: 59Jd is a gas giant; its moon, 59Jd II, is a small, dry world kept very seismically active by the tidal stresses of its parent body. The lack of plate tectonics means that there are massive periodic energy releases that are capable of liquefying huge parts of the crust, resulting in intermittent lava seas that resurface huge portions of the landscape. When these seas form, unique extremophile organisms flourish, whose metabolism is based on unusual high-temperature chemistry; as the lava seas cool, they die off en masse, leaving behind deposits of crystalline sand, and retreat to subsurface magma pockets and isolated shield volcanoes to await the next great seismic event.

FEC-3042-373a: An almost tidally locked planet orbiting a red dwarf. The ratio of the orbital period to the revolutionary period is not quite 1, meaning that the day-night line on the surface processes slowly. 98% of the native biomass is found in this habitable zone, trapped between scorching temperatures on the day side and freezing temperatures on the night; as a consequence, almost every organism found on the planet during the survey was capable of some kind of locomotion, resulting in an entire biosphere that marches slowly across the planet, under the stormy skies where night meets day.

Of the sessile natives, most notable were the lightning-trees, adapted to draw down bursts of electricity from the clouds; their night forms withstand the freezing temperature of the nightside through a kind of hibernation; when trapped on the day side, their shoots bury themselves deep in the bedrock, waiting for the temperature to fall enough to sprout again.

FEC-3061-HJAy: The largest terrestrial planet among a veritable swarm around a massive O-type star. The ruins on the surface indicate it was once colonized by a now long-forgotten alien race, apparently obsessed with working out the complex motions and subtle perturbations of the other bodies in the system. Their entire mythology became based on this peculiar astrology, and though they were not native to this system (indeed, had no major colonies in it besides one observatory and its supporting structures), they were convinced that it was the influence of these planets and these alone that governed the courses of their lives.

FEC-3083-0C2c: A pulsar planet, formed in the aftermath of its parent star’s demise, in the manner of PSR B1257+12. 0C2c is low-mass and contains large internal voids that form a planetwide subterranean cavern system. Thus shielded from the worst of the pulsar’s scouring radiation, these caverns host an entire low-gravity radiotrophic biosphere, including an entire sentient civilization.

After careful study of the indigenous iconography, Surveyor-Xenologist Ellana advanced the tentative hypothesis that the sentient inhabitants of 0C2c were not aware of the existence of other stars, and only partly understood the nature of space and the existence of their own star. They seem to view 0C2c as a malevolent, infernal being, from which the personification of stone and darkness, a kind of Earth-mother figure, has protected them by enclosing them in its shell. Given the difficulty of communication, it was decided by the crew that the Soliton could not make productive first contact at this time, and the matter has been delegated to a joint-species Frontier committee for further review.

FEC-3112-HJAc: A terrestrial planet shattered by a massive impact, whose surface is now split by huge crevasses. The result is a planet divided starkly between vast, airless highlands, and impossibly deep, foggy valleys into which the remaining atmosphere has drained. Each is a biosphere completely sundered from the others by millions of years of evolution--each almost as alien to the others as to another world.

FEC-3126-96A: A rogue gas giant with five Earth-sized moons. One, 96A III, hosts the frozen remains of a civilization that arose there and colonized three of the other moons as well. The builders of these ruins did not die out, but in the countless millennia since their civilization fell, and the biospheres of their worlds drastically contracted, they have evolved to fit their new environment. Their distant descendants on each moon are distinct varieties of nonsentient deep-ocean dwellers who cluster around volcanic vents fed by tidal tectonic activity

FEC-3139-9JVd: An extremely rapidly rotating planet with days only a couple of hours long; because of the high speed of rotation, the surface is wracked by blisteringly fast winds. These winds are so intense that they whip the water up into a dense surface-level fog, with no clear distinction between land, air, and sea.

FEC-3150-CCQb: In most respects, an unremarkable terrestrial planet with a rich biosphere. Notable primarily for the life cycle of its one sentient species: like Earth’s cicada, they spend the majority of their life dormant beneath the soil, emerging every decade or two in great swarms, during which they marry and reproduce and feed in a frenzy of activity that lasts only a few months. As their population and their mastery of tool use has increased, each emergence has caused more and more environmental devastation, which has induced worry among their leaders and strife among different political factions. The politics of the world are further complicated by the fact that different broods have different periods of hibernation, and were not aware of one another (unless two swarms happened to coincide) until quite recently in the planet’s history.

The tacticle-electric system of communication used by the natives proved opaque, but standard first contact greeting protocols were exchanged. The inhabitants of CCQb seemed to be aware that alien life was a possibility, but have made no attempts to travel into space themselves.

FEC-3156-AHBc: Despite being located dozens of lightyears from CCQb, the Soliton was astonished to discover that AHBc hosted a biosphere chemically identical to CCQb, with a native population that was, to all external appearance, identical to the swarmers encountered already, albeit with a dramatically different life cycle and culture. The inhabitants of AHBc professed no knowledge of CCQb, nor of any interstellar visitors before the Soliton’s arrival. There is no indication either on CCQb or AHBc that the species found there--including the sentient ones--did not evolve in situ. After considering the problem for a number of weeks, Surveyor-Geneticist Tal was observed to throw up her hands in frustration, to exclaim several blistering oaths, and to lock herself in her quarters. Efforts to coax her out are ongoing.

FEC-3171-275d: A planet notable in that intelligent life has appeared on it not once, but twice. 275d has an extremely high average surface temperature, varying between about 40C at the poles and regularly reaching 70C at the equator. The current planetary civilization, derived from arboreal stock, has conducted extensive archeological and climatological investigations of 275d’s past, and believes that a mass extinction 25 million years ago was accompanied by a massive carbon spike, the result of an industrial civilization burning fossil fuels. Whether by foolhardiness or deliberate action, they did not slow their rate of fossil fuel consumption as the planet began to warm up; several positive feedback loops subsequently triggered, accelerating the temperature increase of the surface further, and leading to the establishment of a new equilibrium where the average surface temperature was about 25C warmer. The last enclaves of the previous civilization were found at the poles, and ceased to exist at around 12 degrees of warming; as this civilization left behind no durable records of its culture, history, or beliefs, little has been ascertained as to why no effort was made to avert this warming.

The subsequent rise to sentience of the current dominant species was made possible by the great environmental shifts triggered in the process, though, although their growth has been somewhat hampered by the lack of access to readily available high-energy fuels. The Soliton made a gift of fusion and solar-powered generators to the natives before departure.

Xenologist Bulan appends this note:

It is easy for the layperson to interpret the history of alien civilizations according to the patterns of our own, to read a clear environmentalist’s moral into the fate of the first inhabitants of 275d. I caution against this. Humanity has had close contact with four alien species now, and made passing first contact with over a dozen, and the one constant is that--even among civilizations closely aligned in values with our own--the alien mind is nonetheless alien, and often driven by motivations and goals which are absurd, self-defeating, or opaque to us. It is by no means safe to assume 275d owes its present condition to arrogance, stubborness, or foolishness: these human vices are predicated on having a humanlike mind. It is not conceivable that a civilization able to induce climate change of the scale we have seen we not understand the cause of such climate change. It is entirely plausible--indeed it seems to me likely--that the architects of 275d’s warming saw it (and their own subsequent extinction) as in some sense a necessary, valuable, or important outcome on its own. Why? Neither we nor 275d’s current inhabitants can know.

light in the dark

Part One

Fandom: The Umbrella Academy (Netflix)

Ship: Diego Hargreeves x Original Character

Warnings: Language, abuse (emotional and physical), mental illness, violence and, in later chapters, smut.

Since she left home six years earlier Eve’s lifestyle had always been itinerant. Without any of the usual identification that a person would use to gain employment and rent a property, without any ties, she had spent years living out of train stations and bus shelters, hostels when she could, taking it in turns with her few outfits at the launderette and pacing the streets, grateful that she could never freeze in these cold temperatures.

They had already deemed her demon spawn from the moment of her arrival, her mother having suddenly began giving birth at noon despite there having been no sign of pregnancy just minutes before. When the delivery was over, Judith had for a moment interpreted this as a sign of the second coming - but their leader was the only one permitted to read signs from God and he’d had no message to expect this virgin birth. When, as a child, she began starting fires with her hands - well that just cemented it as a clear she was a sign that the Devil was testing them.

It had been more than 20 years before she escaped their isolated existence and found her way into what she still thought of as the outside world - the real world - and when sat in a library reading and educating herself in all the knowledge denied by her religious upbringing she had learned she wasn’t alone. There were 42 others - she had never been recorded, part of a sect that did not believe in birth certificates among other contact with the government - and some of them could do strange things too.

She had made her way to this city hoping to maybe meet one of the Umbrella Academy - maybe to find answers or at least kinship of some kind, somebody who understood. When she actually met one of them it was by accident.

Her body temperature never dropped below 38C, and her hands where the power focused were always over 40C, but like most of the homeless she moved around at night. It felt safer to be on the move - but life isn’t like that.

She must have looked like an easy target - young women in her twenties, delicately built, and alone. And the men weren’t wrong as they crowded her toward the alley.

“Looking for some company baby?”

“No - thank you” she murmured, trying to sidestep but her arm was grabbed, preventing her from moving. She looked between their faces, panic rising inside her - and with it her body temperature.

“Pretty thing like you, all alone? We’ll take care of you” one said, his tone mocking as he reached for her waist - and she grabbed at his arm to deflect him, twisting away as the smell of smouldering fabric and tendrils of smoke began to rise.

“What the-“

It was hard to say whether they were reacting to her or the knife that appeared, a flash of silver curving through the air in an impossible trajectory.

Using the moment of confusion, she pushed at her assailant’s chest, leaving a charred handprint as she leveraged herself away and ducked back into the shadows, eyes wide as she watched another blade hiss through the night gloom and pin one of the men against the bricks.

The other two took their chances and fled, and it was a dark figure in an eye mask who appeared and grabbed the one remaining, yanking him backward - and noting the blackened print of her palm with a frown. Grabbing the collar, he yanked the coat, hard, stripping it from the young man’s back and shoving him hard so he fell to the ground.

“Out of here. Now” he spat before turning toward her, not even watching as the stranger half ran half stumbled away. Shaking the jacket toward the shape still hiding in the shadow he asked “You want to share how you managed that?”

For a moment she was silent, thoughts whirling in her mind before coming to settle in a pattern of realisation.

Knives. Thrown knives that travelled in an arc that should be impossible. And a mask.

The Umbrella Academy. Surely.

Swallowing back nerves she stepped forward - and watched as his gaze readjusted several inches lower than he’d expected for her height - and proffered her hands. Turning them palm upwards, the gesture intended to convey peace, she focused - and her palms began to glow, red light and heat radiating out like lit coals, the pose now conveying far more threat that traditional.

His eyes widened, watching as in the chilly, damp evening steam appeared to rise from her slender, trembling fingers, before he looked back to her face. He opened his mouth as though to speak but appeared lost for words and she shrugged, hardly less confused.

“I was born on the first of October 1989, at noon” she whispered after a moment. 

As introductions went it wouldn’t meet any etiquette standard – but he understood and made the same connection. “You’re one of the others”. The words seemed stunned, even though Eve couldn’t help but assume he must have wondered - ever since she read about the Event, she couldn’t help but think where the rest were. 

“My name is Eve” she offered. Named for the first sinner, named because from the moment she appeared in the world the people who raised her assumed she was a sign of Hell on Earth, a demon child who needed the evil beaten out of them.

“Diego” he offered after a moment, bending forward slightly to look at her hands - her fingers now white hot and the hint of flames beginning to lick along her skin until she curled them into a fist, extinguishing them. It was harder to sustain fire as opposed to just her usual warmth, it pulled energy from the rest of her body - trying to maintain it too long left her seeing stars. 

“Shit” he murmured, more to himself than her. “So the rest...huh”.

“I don’t know about ‘the rest’. There’s me. I found you – and your siblings”. Eve shrugged. The Umbrella Academy were easy to find, marketed more like toys than children, but the others born that day? Maybe they could be found, but it would require skills and connections Eve didn’t have. All she had found so far were dead ends, rumours – and death certificates. 

“Thank you. For them” she nodded toward the jacket he still held, the only remaining sign of the strange men, as an explanation. “Saving lives baby - that’s what I do”. The word didn’t sound the same from him, the flippant way he said it didn’t make her spine shudder as the stranger’s sleazy compliment had. “You should get home though - streets aren’t safe, even with that trick”.

“The streets are my home” Eve admitted with a shrug. That seemed to get his attention as much as her talent, and he frowned. As he scrutinised her she shrugged again, unsure what she could offer other than her life story and frankly that was nothing worth telling.

“So you’re here – looking for the Umbrella Academy – and living on the streets. What, you figured you’d join the gang? Get yourself adopted by a billionaire too?” he asked, his frustration clear and Eve shook her head, slightly hurt at how mercenary it made her sound.

“I had thought - maybe if I came here, I could - well, find some of you. Find somebody who got it. I didn’t have anywhere else to go - or anyone, or anything”. It was a sad, pathetic and highly abbreviated account of her life and Diego’s features softened slightly even as he audibly sighed with frustration.

“I read your sister’s book” she added, almost regretting that disclosure at the way he sneered and turned his head away. “I know – I know it wasn’t some fairy-tale, that isn’t why I’m here. But if you had nothing…if you had nobody…well, do you know a better way to pick a city?” She knew it had been a hugely flawed plan – hell, it barely deserved the title ‘plan’ which implied far more organisation than her actual idea. 

“Could we just – get coffee? Please?” Eve asked, hating how pathetic she sounded but having nothing better. She had come to the city and lived here a year without seeing any of them, she had no other leads, no other ideas, nothing in her life she was striving toward – and that meant she couldn’t help but sound desperate.

“Coffee. Fine. C’mon”.

The stolen coat gave him something to cover the knife harness he wore, and a pocket for the mask as Diego lead her into a diner where he threw himself into a booth.  There was nothing in his body language that indicated an openness to this conversation but perching opposite and leaning forward she forced it anyway.

“Didn’t you ever wonder about the others?” she asked, curious. It’s a weird feeling to have been searching for people who’d never even thought about you.

“Sure. Couple of times – but none of them ever came forward” Diego pointed out. “We’re the easiest to find, right – and this is the first time one of the others found us. I figured maybe the rest were normal”. There was enough disdain in those words that she could infer the added words - like my sister - like Vanya.

“I didn’t even know there were others till a few years ago. I hadn’t heard…I thought I was the only one” Eve said, hesitating now. Theories were safe ground; personal history was shaky.

“But then you found out. And came looking – for what?”

“I don’t know” Eve admitted. “I don’t!” she repeated, adamant despite the scoff he wore. “I just…I thought I was the only person, ok. And it was – awful”. Awful hardly covered it, but it wasn’t a lie and her voice quavered at the confession. “Then I found out about you guys, using this way you were different to do good things, famous and everything and then – well. It didn’t last but I thought…you were a team. You were a family. I didn’t have that, and I thought…that maybe I’d find somebody who understood. And I didn’t have anything better as an option so…”

“So?”

So she didn’t know. Spoken out loud it sounded weak and useless even to her. Diego rolled his eyes, torn between frustration and compassion. What she expected from him, he didn’t know – hell, she didn’t know.

“It was shit for us too. And we’re not exactly playing happy families these days. You didn’t miss anything” he assured her, moving to stand. “I don’t know what you thought would happen by coming here, but there’s nothing for you”.

He had intended just to make an honest point – but the way her chin trembled, and she dropped her head forward, an audible hitch in her breathing, made it clear that he’d taken it too far and that held him in place.

Diego didn’t claim to be a superhero, or a nice guy – just somebody who got things done. Somebody had to handle the jobs nobody else wanted, to sort the problems the law couldn’t – and yet despite the fact he told himself that, had spent years hardening himself, he still stood in place looking down at Eve as she attempted to hide her hurt. Finally, he sighed.

“I know a shelter. Homeless shelter. I’ll show you the way. Maybe they can help you figure stuff”.

@lovinglydiego thank you for the encouragement. I’m not done yet - I hope you like this part 1

Day 9: Bandera

Was a slow start today. We were in a middle-holiday dip, I think, but with two days waiting in Bandera, we’ll be back on track soon. 

The night in the Hancock house was pleasant – once I fell asleep. The AC was a bit cold after a warm evening in the sun, but tugging the blanket over my ears helped (also when the neighbours finished their party XP).

Our breakfast for the day was leftover cold pizza from yesterday. It was surprisingly good.

After a quick goodbye to our host, we were in the car, heading east again. And today was a transport day. The road we drove along was the kind that disappears into the horizon, with endless plains on each side. It was beautiful. 

Nothing much happened either way, other than the road being a bit uninspiring to drive according to Øyvind. It’s 563 km from Alpine to Bandera, and it takes around 5 hours to drive.

But it’s true what they say: if you go to Texas, prepare to drive fast. The highway between Alpine and Bandera sports a speed limit of 80 mi/h, which is the equivalent of 132 km/h. Needless to say we went a bit speed blind once we had to turn off the highway.

We stopped for lunch in Fort Stockton, about an hour from Alpine. It’s a pretty small town, and from what we saw, there’s a lot of abandoned buildings (as is with all the small towns we’ve been through), but at least we got to see Paisano Pete.

We ate at a place called Dickeys Barbecue Pit. The food was good, but my pulled pork was a little bit dry. The barbecue beans I got were sublime. Øyvind’s two meat plate with beef brisket and pork ribs was succulent and tasty! As always the portions were too big, and we couldn’t finish it all.

We finally got to Bandera (The Cowboy Capital of the World) around dinner time, and decided to stop at O.S.T (Old Spanish Trail restaurant) to eat, since the ranch we’re staying at doesn’t have anywhere to eat or cook, and we really didn’t want to head out again once we were in place. Think we’re gonna explore a bit tomorrow, maybe.

The food was so good. I finally got to try the chicken fried steak (it’s so up my alley, foodwise), and Øyvind ordered a chicken fried chicken, which was also very good. At first I thought about ordering a peach cobbler for dessert, but I soon realised that I wouldn’t be able to eat anything after dinner. There was a lot of food left on our plates when we left, and we both waddled out, barely able to talk because we were so full.

The road then took us to the middle of nowhere, about ten miles into the “wilderness” (not really), to the place we’re staying for the next two days.

There’s no reception here, and there’s only wi-fi in the main building, not in the cabin we’re staying in, so we will be offline most of the time.

We’re the only ones here at the moment, and it’s kinda neat having the whole place to ourselves. There’s a pool, and in the main building (The Lodge) there’s TV and games and books and a billiards table. Of course we had to play a few games (even though none of us really knows how. At least we’re equally bad at it). No one’s keeping scores, of course, but I won four out of seven games (pure luck).

After that we went outside to sit on the porch and watch the sunset. It’s not as hot as earlier (we’ve been experiencing 39-40C some days), but we’re still around 36-37C. But the temperature drops quickly once the sun sets. And it’s so beautiful, the area we’re in is quiet and calm. 

Also, we’re back in cicada country (didn’t hear much of them out in the desert), and we’ve seen a few pretty birds. The owner’s dog came to say hello too, so that’s a plus.

Now it’s completely dark outside (it’s currently 21.30), and we’re relaxing in The Lodge. Øyvind is lounging in front of the TV and I’m perched in a corner trying to both write and charge my laptop.

Today’s wildlife:

Deer, both live ones and run over ones, one dead skunk, a few grackles, a few cardinals, and a tiny brownish-grey bird with a bright yellow breast. Tried to get a good photo, but they were skittish.

We drove past a farm with what looked suspiciously like oryxes, but that can’t be, can it?

Oh, and I forgot to say we saw Pronghorns out in the desert a couple of days ago.

I still haven’t seen any snakes, live armadillos, or raccoons though, and quite frankly, I’m disappointed. America: step up your game.

Halfway to boiling: the city at 50C

It is the temperature at which human cells start to cook, animals suffer and air conditioners overload power grids. Once an urban anomaly, 50C is fast becoming reality 

Imagine a city at 50C (122F). The pavements are empty, the parks quiet, entire neighbourhoods appear uninhabited. Nobody with a choice ventures outside during daylight hours. Only at night do the denizens emerge, HG Wells-style, into the streets – though, in temperatures that high, even darkness no longer provides relief. Uncooled air is treated like effluent: to be flushed as quickly as possible.

School playgrounds are silent as pupils shelter inside. In the hottest hours of the day, working outdoors is banned. The only people in sight are those who do not have access to air conditioning, who have no escape from the blanket of heat: the poor, the homeless, undocumented labourers. Society is divided into the cool haves and the hot have-nots.

Those without the option of sheltering indoors can rely only on shade, or perhaps a water-soaked sheet hung in front of a fan. Construction workers, motor-rickshaw drivers and street hawkers cover up head to toe to stay cool. The wealthy, meanwhile, go from one climate-conditioned environment to another: homes, cars, offices, gymnasiums, malls.

Asphalt heats up 10-20C higher than the air. You really could fry an egg on the pavement. A dog’s paws would blister on a short walk, so pets are kept behind closed doors. There are fewer animals overall; many species of mammals and birds have migrated to cooler environments, perhaps at a higher altitude – or perished. Reptiles, unable to regulate their body temperatures or dramatically expand their range, are worst placed to adapt. Even insects suffer.

Maybe in the beginning, when it was just a hot spell, there was a boom in spending as delighted consumers snapped up sunglasses, bathing suits, BBQs, garden furniture and beer. But the novelty quickly faded when relentless sunshine became the norm. Consumers became more selective. Power grids are overloaded by cooling units. The heat is now a problem.

The temperature is recalibrating behaviour. Appetites tend to fade as the body avoids the thermal effect of food and tempers are quicker to flare – along, perhaps, with crime and social unrest. But eventually lethargy sets in as the body shuts down and any prolonged period spent outdoors becomes dangerous.

Hospitals see a surge in admissions for heat stress, respiratory problems and other illnesses exacerbated by high temperatures. Some set up specialist wards. The elderly, the obese and the sick are most at risk. Deaths rise.

At 50C – halfway to water’s boiling point and more than 10C above a healthy body temperature – heat becomes toxic. Human cells start to cook, blood thickens, muscles lock around the lungs and the brain is choked of oxygen. In dry conditions, sweat – the body’s in-built cooling system – can lessen the impact. But this protection weakens if there is already moisture in the air.

A so-called “wet-bulb temperature” (which factors in humidity) of just 35C can be fatal after a few hours to even the fittest person, and scientists warn climate change will make such conditions increasingly common in India, Pakistan, south-east Asia and parts of China. Even under the most optimistic predictions for emissions reductions, experts say almost half the world’s population will be exposed to potentially deadly heat for 20 days a year by 2100.

Not long ago, 50C was considered an anomaly, but it is increasingly widespread. Earlier this year, the 1.1 million residents of Nawabshah, Pakistan, endured the hottest April ever recorded on Earth, as temperatures hit 50.2C. In neighbouring India two years earlier, the town of Phalodi sweltered in 51C – the country’s hottest ever day.

Dev Niyogi, professor at Purdue University, Indiana, and chair of the Urban Environment department at the American Meteorological Society, witnessed how cities were affected by extreme heat on a research trip to New Delhi and Pune during that 2015 heatwave in India, which killed more than 2,000 people.

“You could see the physical change. Road surfaces started to melt, neighbourhoods went quiet because people didn’t go out and water vapour rose off the ground like a desert mirage,” he recalls.

“We must hope that we don’t see 50C. That would be uncharted territory. Infrastructure would be crippled and ecosystem services would start to break down, with long-term consequences.”

Several cities in the Gulf are getting increasingly accustomed to such heat. Basra – population 2.1 million – registered 53.9C two years ago. Kuwait City and Doha have experienced 50C or more in the past decade. At Quriyat, on the coast of Oman, overnight temperatures earlier this summer remained above 42.6C, which is believed to be the highest “low” temperature ever recorded in the world.

At Mecca, the two million hajj pilgrims who visit each year need ever more sophisticated support to beat the heat. On current trends, it is only a matter of time before temperatures exceed the record 51.3C reached in 2012. Last year, traditionalists were irked by plans to install what are reportedly the world’s biggest retractable umbrellas to provide shade on the courtyards and roof of the Great Mosque. Air conditioners weighing 25 tonnes have been brought in to ventilate four of the biggest tents. Thousands of fans already cool the marble floors and carpets, while police on horseback spray the crowds with water.

Football supporters probably cannot expect such treatment at the Qatar World Cup in 2022, and many may add to the risks of hyperthermia and dehydration by taking off their shirts and drinking alcohol. Fifa is so concerned about conditions that it has moved the final from summer to a week before Christmas. Heat is also why Japanese politicians are now debating whether to introduce daylight saving time for the 2020 Tokyo Olympics so that marathon and racewalk athletes can start at what is currently 5am and avoid mid-afternoon temperatures that recently started to pass 40C with humidity of more than 80%.

At the Australian open in Melbourne this year – when ambient temperatures reached 40C – players were staggering around like “punch-drunk boxers” due to heatstroke. Even walking outside can feel oppressive at higher temperatures. “The blast of furnace-like heat ... literally feels life-threatening and apocalyptic,” says Nigel Tapper, professor of environmental science at Melbourne’s Monash University, of the 48C recorded in parts of the city. “You cannot move outside for more than a few minutes.”

The feeling of foreboding is amplified by the increased threat of bush and forest fires, he adds. “You cannot help but ask, ‘How can this city operate under these conditions? What can we do to ensure that the city continues to provide important services for these conditions? What can we do to reduce temperatures in the city?’           

Those places already struggling with extreme heat are doing what they can. In Ahmedabad, in Gujarat, hospitals have opened specialist heat wards. Australian cities have made swimming pools accessible to the homeless when the heat creeps above 40C, and instructed schools to cancel playground time. In Kuwait, outside work is forbidden between noon and 4pm when temperatures soar.

But many regulations are ignored, and companies and individuals underestimate the risks. In almost all countries, hospital admissions and death rates tend to rise when temperatures pass 35C – which is happening more often, in more places. Currently, 354 major cities experience average summer temperatures in excess of 35C; by 2050, climate change will push this to 970, according to the recent “Future We Don’t Want” study by the C40 alliance of the world’s biggest metropolises. In the same period, it predicts the number of urban dwellers exposed to this level of extreme heat will increase eightfold, to 1.6 billion.

As baselines shift across the globe, 50C is also uncomfortably near for tens of millions more people. This year, Chino, 50km (30 miles) from Los Angeles, hit a record of 48.9C, Sydney saw 47C, and Madrid and Lisbon also experienced temperatures in the mid-40s. New studies suggest France “could easily exceed” 50C by the end of the century while Australian cities are forecast to reach this point even earlier. Kuwait, meanwhile, could sizzle towards an uninhabitable 60C.

How to cool dense populations is now high on the political and academic agenda, says Niyogi, who last week co-chaired an urban climate symposium in New York. Cities can be modified to deplete heat through measures to conserve water, create shade and deflect heat. In many places around the world, these steps are already under way.                        

The city at 50C could be more tolerable with lush green spaces on and around buildings; towers with smart shades that follow the movement of the sun; roofs and pavements painted with high-albedo surfaces; fog capture and renewable energy fields to provide cooling power without adding to the greenhouse effect.

But with extremes creeping up faster than baselines, Niyogi says this adapting will require changes not just to the design of cities, but how they are organised and how we live in them. First, though, we have to see what is coming – which might not hit with the fury of a flood or typhoon but can be even more destructive.

“Heat is different,” says Niyogi. “You don’t see the temperature creep up to 50C. It can take people unawares.”

https://www.theguardian.com/cities/2018/aug/13/halfway-boiling-city-50c

Time To Be Honest

Hey guys,

As my follower and reblog count keeps going up (which I can’t figure out why), I feel like I owe you an explanation on what has been going on with me lately.

Sure, I reblog occasionally, I post some random stuff and I comment here and there because, after all, this blog has a special place in my heart and I don’t want it to die...

However, life isn’t what is was four years ago (already oh my god).

Four years ago I left for Canada to study, it was the first time in my life I would leave on my own and go somewhere I didn’t know. So, at 17 years old I landed in Montreal in a foster family, in a school I didn’t know, in a city I barely knew. Mind you, it was one of the best decisions I ever made in my life, I made friends, (even a boyfriend) became the “surrogate” daughter of a mom who had three boys, went twice to NY for Christmas and New Year (ball drop on Time Square people...), I discovered -40C, winter that lasted til April, having responsabilities for rent, phone, etc... But most importantly I discovered myself, as cliché as it may seem.

And as soon as it had begun I was back... my Canadian “green card” got denied, my boyfriend and I split up, any attempt at finding a job in France was going nowhere, however, I did get my driver’s licence.

In June I got to go back to Canada with my parents for Graduation, American style baby, like the ones you see on TV with the robes and the hat and all of that, I saw my friends again, my teachers, traveled a bit, and got back...

Got a new boyfriend who was an old friend (going on two years now!!), got my high school diploma at 20 years old while studying at home and not at school, moved out with my boyfriend, got a job, and started uni studying foreign languages (english-spanish).

My point is...

These last few years have been one hell of a ride where I quickly had to go from teenager relying on mom and dad, to grown up having to do stuff by herself.

I learned that altough I don’t especially like to go out, drink, or be social actually, I love travelling, I want to see everything the world has to offer, I want to live in another country, I want to go back to Canada at least on vacation.

I don’t want to be scared about money every middle of the month because even though my boyfriend and I work and I’m studying, our accounts are never positive. I don’t want to obsess over finding a new place that’s cheaper but still has enough room for 2. I don’t want to be reminded that I have at least 2 years before I graduate, without knowing where I’ll do my internship because I don’t have money (and a quite overwhelming student loan), and if I’ll actually get a job that I like later.

I don’t want to be terrified of not writing again because every time I get an idea, picture a couple in my head, start to write a story, I always come up with issues that prevent me from finishing or even starting it.

These past few years have almost been constant worry of what might be, what is, and what will be.

I feel like I’m just following a life I’m not sure I even want, and the few certainties that I have come crumbling down because I’m scared all the time.

This is why I haven’t written in a while, why I have trouble sleeping at night, why I want to dump everything (well, maybe not my boyfriend) and just go on vacation or wait until something finally feels right. Why sometimes I feel like crying or screaming or maybe both, why I ugly cry in front of romantic movies, tv shows, animal videos...

This is why I’m sort of feeling depressed, and unfortunately it has been going on for a few months if not years now.

I’ve become quite good at hiding my feelings, but for once I want to be honest with some people, and myself. I want to finally put on paper what’s holding me back and scaring me.

I want to find a solution without knowing where I should look, but knowing that it will take a long time to feel better.

I want you guys to know that even though life isn’t great for me right now, I’m not forgetting you, the people that followed my stories, sent me prompts or simply liked what was coming out of my head.

Because, just like Canada has been a turning point in my life, you guys make my life a bit better, a bit brighter, and you actually give me a goal...

To start writing again.

“Ah-ah-ah, you’re sick. You need to stay in bed”

I will go down with this ship 

Alec refuses to stay in bed, even when he’s sick 

Doing two things at once can be difficult, even for the high warlock of Brooklyn. Stirring a potion with one finger and adding spices to a soup can be trying at times, there were multiple occasions Magnus almost accidentally put werewolf talons in the soup and ginger in the potion.

Alec has fallen ill at the start of the week after coming back from patrol, at first it was just a slight cough but by the end of the night he was puking his guts up and had a fever of over 40c. Of course, Alec being Alec he had told Magnus that he was fine and could go back to work but that clearly wasn’t the case, on both his and Catarina’s orders Alec was strictly on bed rest for at least a week.

A light shuffling came from Magnus’ and Alec’s shared room, causing Magnus to turn his attention away from the two pots; was Alec waking up? Magnus had left Alec to sleep a few hours ago whilst he made soup for his poorly shadowhunter, he had barely any strength, he couldn’t be getting up… right? With a silent shrug, Magnus turned back to the pots and continued to flick through his potion book to read through the ingredients for the potion.

The sound of the door opening is when Magnus knew something was up, turning around to face the door Magnus was instantly confused. Alec was making his way out of their bedroom in full shadowhunter hunter gear, thigh holster and all

“Alexander?” Magnus questioned quickly making his way over to the pale shadowhunter, he gently grabbed his biceps to stop him from swaying

“What are you doing out of bed? In your gear no less” Magnus asked looking Alec over once more, he could barely lift a cup this morning how could he have gotten his gear on?

“Jace… texted me, said there was an attack or something, I need to help” Alec answered, his voice coming out thick and raspy

“What? No way, Alec you can hardly stand!” Magnus argued feeling anger fill his stomach, how dare Jace message Alec to come help when he knew that his parabatai was still sick, he was going to be the death of Alec

“But I ne-

“Ah-ah-ah, you’re sick. You need to stay in bed” Magnus said firmly, his grip on Alec’s biceps tightening a little as he felt Alec tip a little. Alec let out a low whine and placed his forehead against Magnus’ shoulder making the warlock smile, his poor, poor shadowhunter

“Let’s get you back to bed shall we?” Magnus suggested, Alec nodded his head against Magnus’ shoulder in response; even after a week Alec was still quite warm and heat was radiating off him. Magnus gently turned Alec around and guided him into the bedroom and onto their bed which was covered in multiple blankets, even though Alec was burning up he still shivered and exclaimed how cold he was constantly.

“How did you manage to get your gear on?” Magnus questioned as he began unbuckling Alec’s boots and slipping them off his feet

“Magic…” Alec responded causing Magnus to chuckle, clearly, he was still a little out of it.

“I didn’t know you were a warlock Alexander” Magnus smirked as Alec nodded in response

“I am, better watch out, I’m gonna be the high warlock by next month” Alec smiled as Magnus slipped his jeans off

“I’m sure you will be dear” Magnus hummed as he pulled Alec’s shirt over his head and guided back down into a laying position

“Mags…” Alec whimpered as his smile disappeared from his face

“Yes, darling? Is something the matter?” Magnus questioned as he noticed the sudden change in expression

“‘Mm sick of being useless” Alec replied with a sigh

“Useless? What do you mean?” Magnus asked raising an eyebrow

“Been in bed all weak… I can’t do anythi-

“Shhh, don’t talk like that my love, you’re just sick. You’ll be back on your feet and killing demons in no time” Magnus hushed the distressed Nephilim as he gently ran a hand through Alec’s hair knowing that was a quick way to make him fall asleep

“Sleep for a little longer, I’ll wake you when your soup is ready” Magnus instructed him quietly

“Love… you…” Alec mumbled as he drifted off yet again

“I love you too sweetheart” Magnus smiled and leaned down placing a kiss on his warm forehead. Tucking the blanket up to Alec’s chin, Magnus turned and left the room heading straight towards his phone, ready to give that blondie a piece of his mind. It didn’t take long for Jace to pick up after Magnus had dialled his number

“Magnus, where’s Alec?” Jace asked the moment he picked up

“First of all, how dare you” Magnus replied, ignoring Jace’s question

“What are you talkin-

“Don’t you dare act dumb blondie, you know Alec is sick! Yet you call on him anyway, he can hardly stand! How do you expect him to help with a demon attack!?” Magnus shouted at him

“I’m sorry Magnus but we need ever-

“What you need to do is to let your brother get well again, goodbye shadowhunter” Magnus said firmly before hanging up the phone and taking a deep breath in trying to calm himself

“I hope the soup hasn’t overcooked” Magnus mumbled to himself as he hurried back over to the stove

It took another fifteen minutes for the soup to be ready and cool enough for Alec to be able to eat it without burning his tongue off. The potion needed to brew for a few hours allowing Magnus time to look after Alec for a while. Once the soup was in a bowl, Magnus grabbed it and went into the bedroom were Alec was still sleeping peacefully.

“Alexander, sweetheart wake up I have your soup” Magnus said gently placing a hand on Alec’s shoulder, the shadowhunter groaned in response and buried his face into one of the golden pillows

“Don’t worry love, the sooner you eat your soup the sooner you can go back to sleep, I may even join you for a while” Magnus continued as he sat down on a chair next to the bed, Alec groaned in protest once more but opened his eyes and looked over at Magnus

“Did you call Jace?” Alec asked as he sat up against the headboard

“I did, don’t you worry about anything now, open” Magnus said as he held up a spoonful of soup

“I can feed myself” Alec mumbled crossing his arms over his chest, Magnus had to hold back a laugh at the sight of Alec. His face flushed and nose bright pink, hair askew and skin pale with that frown on his face as he crossed his arms; he looked like a toddler having a tantrum

“You couldn’t hold a cup on your own this morning, I just want to help you my love” Magnus replied giving him a smile of sympathy. Alec sighed and uncrossed his arms, opening his mouth for Magnus to feed him.

“Not a baby…” Alec mumbled after swallowing his soup, the warmth felt good against his sore throat

“I know honey, but you’re my baby”

Have a request or prompt? Send me a message! 

Preparing For Your Trip

Preparing For Your Wilderness Trip

  Almost a decade ago, in 2009 I embarked on one of the most challenging and fulfilling hikes of my entire life. The 850km Bruce Trail which ran from Queenston, Ontario to Tobermory. This hike took over a year to plan, and about four months to execute. It earned me a world record as I was the first person to hike the entire trail completely barefoot. It also changed my life and career path. Since that hike, I have received hundreds of emails from would-be backpackers who are embarking on similar treks around the world. Many people have questions as to how to get started, what to pack, what to expect, and other such things. In this article I will attempt to describe some of the preparation progress for trips of such grandeur. In this article I will discuss the first preparation stages of a long distance backpack trip.  

The First Steps

After you have decided where you want to go, it's time to start planning the logistics of your trip. How will you pay your bills when you're gone? Most people will put away a little bit of money every pay to save up for a trip. This will help a lot of if you're going away for multiple months. You want to make sure that you're power isn't cut off while you're gone. Who will take care of your stuff? Be sure someone will come around to your house, cut your grass, bring in the mail, water plants, etc. What time of year is best for your location? Some areas of the world are subject to vast changes in conditions. You don't want to be hiking during monsoon season. You have to be careful of blackfly season in some areas. Sometimes summer is the best time of year, other times fall, or even winter if it's a dogsled expedition. What Temperature will it be? Temperature changes during the year are another consideration. You want to make sure you know the temperature so you can pack and have the correct clothes for the weather. You don't need your Canada Goose parka if it's going to be +40C and you'll need more than sandals if it's going to be -20C. Documents Be sure to have all your documents in place. Park permits,  Passport, Drivers Licence, and vaccinations. Be sure to check if you need to make reservations in advance. Many parks fill up quickly in peak season. If you're going out of country be sure that you have all required documents for yourself and pets before you travel. This will save you a world hurt.  

How Will You Get There?

It's important to know how you will get to and from your destination. Often overlooked this is an important part of your preparation. If you have your own vehicle where will it be left? Will it be safe to leave for a few weeks?  If you come back to a dead battery, how will you fix it? Especially if there is no mobile coverage in the area. An open air Jeep such as the one pictured above makes a fantastic travel vehicle, however would not be suitable to leave unattended in a remote parking lot for two weeks. It would most likely become the residence for wild animals such as raccoons, and mice. The vehicle would also get damaged from being exposed to rainfall or worse stolen due to it's easy access. Is there bus service to your start point? If bus service doesn't run close to your start point perhaps you could use uber? Will all your backpacks, dogs, and yourself fit in a small car? (Just beware if you have pets not all uber drivers will accept your dogs.)  

Get Maps

Once you have all the boring details above sorted out, now it's time to plan your actual trip. Get a hold of some maps for your trip. Often maps are available online. Don't trust sources such as google maps if you're going into the wilderness. Be sure you get proper topographic maps which will help you learn where things like sources of water, canyons, roads, campsites. If you're unsure of how to read these maps - now is a good time to start. A proper topography map can save your life during an emergency as well as prevent serious tragedies due to unknown terrain. Areas where there are lots of squiggly lines close together indicate mountains and big hills. The closer the lines are together, the steeper the grade. There are dozens of tutorials available for free around the internet to learn how to properly read a map. Don't hike hike yourself off a cliff, or end up in boggy swamp being eaten alive by bugs if you can avoid it. These details are listed on maps and will save you a world of suffering and hurt. Maps also have distance marks and legends where you can plot how far you will hike each day, and can plot where you will camp. Some areas you can camp anywhere, others you have to use proper campsites. You don't want to stealth camp in a park and get yourself in trouble. Also you don't want to camp in a boggy swamp. Having a map, knowing its use and plotting your daily route will help make things comfortable.  

Personal Fitness

Before you go off trying to hike 1000km with a 30kg backpack on, ask yourself: "can I do this?" Be sure you know how far you can comfortably hike each day over varied terrain. 10km in the city on pavement is NOT 10km in the mountains! Have you practiced several full day hikes loaded with your entire heavy kit? While it is possible to "hike yourself thin" on a longer trip, it's best if you know your limits beforehand to ensure you don't strain yourself to the point of injury or exhaustion. Be sure to go on several all-day hikes with a heavy back before your trip. Ensure your body is conditioned to hike long distances. This will ensure you won't suffer a sprained ankle or be too tired to continue less than half way through your trip. If you are very limited with time, ensure that you plan at least one or two extra days in the event your body lets you down. For example if you plan to hike 80km at 10km per day, be sure you plan to be gone 10 days. This will allow for a couple of short hike days, a day to relax and enjoy the beauty of your destination, or a zero-kilometre day to rest up if you didn't get enough sleep the night before because you were kept up by howling wolves nearby.   In the next article in this series I will discuss outdoor gear. Good luck!  

Week 27

Under the cut!

Last Week: 137 This Week: 138

... yeah, so that’s not good.

I’m not sure what I did wrong. I didn’t cheat and I logged faithfully, and all my meals were pretty healthy. The only thing I can think of is that I had a heavy meal at my parents’ house Sunday night, even though I ate lighter earlier in the day and it was okay on points, but maybe it’s still on my stomach? 

I wasn’t as good as I usually am about keeping moving this week. I was bored at work, because I’m pretty well caught up right now and really just waiting on the attorneys to give me things to do, but I felt guilty leaving on my usual “destress walk” because of it. I know it’s an anxiety thing, and I am allowed to take a break from being in the office, except I also feel like I’m goofing off and looking for stuff to do enough as it is. I just need to kind of push that down so I can take my little walks. I hate being stuck inside all day, and though you’d think being bored wouldn’t be stressful, it really, really is for me. Maybe it’s the fear that if the bosses notice I’m not busy, they’ll either give me a busywork project that I’ll hate or, worse, fire me.

We can’t have that right now...

I’ll just have to grit down and work harder this week. I’m not giving up from one little setback.

I went out and got a proper bra fitting done, because I had sized myself down from a 40C to a 38C (from a 42C at my high four years ago!), but it still didn’t feel quite right and I couldn’t place why. I figured my boobs had gotten smaller and maybe I’d lost a cup size, except I’d tried B cups and that just squished the stupid things. Boobs are literally the stupidest things in the universe. A lingerie store was running a promotion where they gave a $20 coupon off of two bras if you donated your gently-used bras, and I wanted to get it done right. The saleslady was super nice and helpful, but she didn’t even measure me before saying, “You’re definitely not a 38C.” Then, she shoved her entire hand into the back of my bra strap. “I shouldn’t be able to do this.” She measured me, and we tried a few things, but she sized me into an unpadded 34DD. And it fit.

What I said: “I’m what size?”

What I thought: WHAT THE FUCK BOOBS, YOU LOOK SO FUCKING FLAT, I THOUGHT WE WERE JOINING THE ITTY BITTY TITTY COMMITTEE. HOW CAN I BE A DD.

... so I got a good push-up for cosplay (my under-bust vest requires a nice bust to fill in the gap, you know?) and for special occasions, and a nice every-day bra, and I’ll just keep wearing what I have until I can gradually replace it all with the right size. Until the size changes again. God. 

I admit to being glad I’m almost done losing weight. I can’t afford to keep shrinking out of my clothes! Now I just have to decide whether to keep donating things or to keep them on hand out of fear of another backslide. I’d like to think I can get to where I want to be and stay there (until I want to have kids or something, but ahaha let’s not go there right now). However, part of me is scared that I’ll slip further if I don’t maintain constant vigilance.

Otakon is coming soon, and that actually terrifies me too. I’ve got plans to try and make it easier (e.g., bringing healthy muffins for breakfast and fruit for snacks), but I know my schedule won’t be my own and I’m going to be eating out for a lot of meals. I’m also beholden to what the people I’m with want to do, but I’ll just do my best to find the best option for me wherever I go. I know there’s a Panera near the con center, and I can always find something good there, and if we do sushi, I know how to keep the calories low on that. I’m just going to have to keep reassuring myself that I’ll find something I can eat wherever we go and if I go over a little, it’s okay because we’ll do plenty of moving around (hopefully). 

For now, time for another week of stressing about cosplay and being bored to tears at work. Hopefully I can get myself back on track somehow. I just wish I knew what I did wrong.

Week 5: the one in which we meet all of Australia’s creepiest creatures (and some cute ones)

The site we’d been smoked out of is just one of two sites in Kakadu that are famous for rock paintings. We decided to head out to the next one the next day. It was extremely muggy when we got up in the morning with thick cloud and constant rumbling thunder. Apparently these dry thunderstorms are incredibly common at this time of year; they promise rain that never comes and start bush fires. We came across one of these burning by the side of the road just as we came out of town. It was pretty small (hence we drove past it) but even passing it at 100kmph you got an incredible wave of heat off it.

We decided to drop into the visitors centre to learn something more about the area/enjoy some air-con before seeing the rock paintings. It was alas not air-conned. We thus poured sweat and steamed away in the 40c heat whilst learning about frogs etc.

By the time we arrived at the first site there was a bit of a breeze. This was pleasant. The rock art was pleasant. We walked to the second site. Just as we stepped under the rock awnings to the sheltered spot where ancient people had sheltered from thunderstorms and doodled on the walls, teeming rain began. And continued. Apparently the weather hadn’t got the memo it was still supposed to be the dry season. We assumed it would last a couple of minutes. It did not. 20 minutes later, us and a very wet tour group were still in there.

Eventually we made a dash for the car. We were booked into a sunset river cruise about 60km away so our hope was we’d drive out of the weather. Which we did. By the time we arrived at the yellow water cruise site, the weather was cloudy but there was no rain. This lasted about ten minutes after we set off, after which the heavens opened with thunder and lightening. And the rain was cold. And furious. We were in a little aluminium boat (having just received a safety briefing involving having no limbs over the side at all unless we wanted crocodiles to pull us under) with open sides. Our tour operator, who was driving the boat, said he was just going to “stick near the trees to protect us from lightening”. This was a strategy I was not sure was based in science at all. Also if we weren’t struck my lightening, having a boat capsized because a tree has been struck and fallen onto the boat, is what I would describe as suboptimal in a river packed full of saltwater crocodiles.

And we did see a LOT of those. Hanging out, fighting, trying to catch fish from our bow waves. It was pretty horrifying. Bit like being in Jurassic Park- since as nature’s perfect killing machines, they haven’t needed to evolve since then. We did also see water buffalo, cows and brumbies, but some huge bird thing, and eventually the rain stopped. Plus we didn’t get struck by lightening and no one got dragged overboard by a crocodile, so that’s a win.

The next day was thankfully more sunny. We were heading back to Katherine, because we’d not yet had a chance to visit Katherine Gorge, which is the big “must see” of the area. However on the way there was another beautiful swimming spot to visit- Edith Falls. Marcel suggested we could either read and swim or swim and go for a hike. Since it was, as usual for sunny days, about 38c and I could see the hike and it was full of climbing giant rocky hills, I told him he could go for a hike and I’d stick around and swim and read. He considered the hike but the swimming hole really was delightful and in the end he stuck with me.

The pool had a warning sign saying the waterfall at the back of it was 150m away and to swim within your ability. Apparently everyone who visited Edith Springs (all 7-8 of them) had a very low impression of their abilities (perhaps having had a similar riptide experience to me) so they all stuck within about 3m of the steps down into the lake. We swum over to the waterfall and had the whole place to ourselves, all afternoon, which was rather delightful. We alternated between swimming and reading and enjoying a ridiculously beautiful spot that was nearly empty.

We awoke the next morning to the sounds of a thunderstorm. Which again shouldn’t have been happening and was also a little dispiriting as our afternoon plan was 4 hours of kayaking. An activity that is distinctly less enjoyable in teeming rain. However we decided to see how things played out. Our first planned activity of the day was a trip to Cutta-Cutta Caves, which is a series of caves near Katherine that Marcel mostly wanted to visit as they apparently have a lot of snakes. This he did not tell me when he booked us onto it. I was somewhat unkeen to enter the caves most caves flood in the rain and I didn’t want a repeat of the Thai football team, only in a cave jam-packed with snakes. However by the time we’d arrived the rain had stopped and our guide promised us that the only snakes in the caves most days were tree snakes and “they are only mildly venomous so if you get bitten you just have to chill out for a couple of hours with a beer”. Probably this just meant your leg would fall off. Mild by Australian venom standards.  

We were the only people on the cave tour. It was thankfully very dry, unfortunately not cold (not deep enough) and we did see some tree snakes. One of them was doing a great impression of a stalactite. They apparently hang out on the walls and eat bats as they fly in and out the cave.

After that we set off for the gorges. By this time, the sun was out and it was boiling hot again. This was in some respects great (good for kayaking) but in other respects suboptimal, as you aren’t supposed to “pollute” the freshwater with suncream. So I had decided to put on my burkini. Which is fine but to get to the gorges where you can kayak, you have to take a boat trip through the first gorge because it could potentially have crocodiles. So we had to walk 500m down to the dock and then sit on a boat for 15 minutes. Swaddled in neck-to-foot black swimwear, I was concerned I was going to die of heat stroke before reaching the kayak.

We grabbed our double kayak (he tried to give us two solo ones but screw paddling for myself) and paddled to the nearest marked beach for a swim (some of the gorge beaches are designated for the freshwater crocodiles to lay their eggs). Swimming having just cooked in my suit for that long felt amazing. We had an amazing afternoon of paddling, swimming, paddling, picnicking and swimming. There was only one other pair out in kayaks and we only saw them once all afternoon so it felt like we were pretty much the only people in the gorge system. It was amazing.

This was at least gave us some nice memories to revel in during the next day. In which we drove for hours and hours and hours to get to Tenant Creek, a town that is generally described as a shithole. It wasn’t particularly obviously awful, but the only recommended activity in town was to visit the local lake “recreational park”. Being big on swimming and finally being out of crocodile territory we grabbed our swimsuits and headed out there. To find at this time of year it is a muddy waterhole, surrounded by an all-male collection of peacocks, guinea fowl, geese and about a million ants that immediately tried to eat our feet. We did not stay for long.

The next day we drove on down to Alice Springs, via the Devil’s Marbles (a bunch of large, roundish rocks) which we found underwhelming (although full of interesting frog facts).

We set off quite early because we’d booked onto a kangaroo tour that only runs in the evenings on the week days and so we had to make the Friday night trip out to the sanctuary. The sanctuary there is run by a guy who has spent years saving orphaned baby kangaroos (second to their general idiocy as adults when it comes to cars). He had a BBC TV programme made about him because clearly nothing ticks the British boxes like slightly handsome man and adorable baby animals. 

The tour was fantastic though, because he always has a bunch of orphaned kangaroos on the go, so you spend the tour holding baby kangaroos and feeding them whilst he shows you the sanctuary. It was amazing and about level 10 Australian on the scale of experiences.

Just as soon as we’d left it started teeming with rain and a thunderstorm began. We dashed back to our airbnb to discover the rain had brought out….a fucking giant spider. Like the size of your nightmares. I immediately requested Marcel killed it. He refused as thought it might be dangerous...so thought it would be safer to catch and release. I suggested it was his funeral but I would stand on the other side of the room and watch. One terrifying spider released.

We sat down at the table and tried to relax. Google suggested it was a harmless Huntsman spider. We decided whatever it was we were glad it was gone, only to notice sitting on the picture frame right by the table was ANOTHER FUCKING MASSIVE ONE. Catch and release repeated again. Then I made Marcel pretty much crawl around the airbnb with a torch before I would sit down on any surface.

The next day we decided we’d have a lazy day in town. It was a cool 29c, which felt amazing. We wandered into the free aviation museum to see the wreck of the Kookaburra- a plane that was scrambled to rescue the plane that crashed on the mudflats of Wyndham (the ones I talked about a few years ago where they drank coffee and rum cocktails until they were rescued) and crashed killing the rescuers. I was mostly just curious to see how tiny a 1920s plane was. So tiny. So fragile.

After that we went to the Desert Animal Park, which was basically a zoo of local creatures. Given I’ve never seen a Quoll, dingo, weird thorny devil lizard thing, it was pretty exciting. Also they had a bird show featuring a magpie that called out on command etc. A pleasantly relaxing afternoon was had by all.

When we got back home though, relaxation time was over fairly immediately as we came back to find one of the giant spiders wanted back in and was hanging out on the screen door.

Marcel chased it under the house with a broom and we spent the evening with our legs drawn up on the sofa, watching movies and feeling very twitchy glaring at the shadows.

On Sunday, we decided to head out of town for a swim. We went out to a place called Ellery Creek Big Hole. For the last few weeks all of our swims had been in gloriously warm waters. However around Alice Springs it gets cold at night, and the water in the Big Hole was deep and very very cold. It was hot enough that it made swimming pleasant, but the cold was quite shocking. We spent the afternoon alternating between swimming and warming up on the sand around the pool.

And so concluded week 5. Warm swims left behind us, but still plenty of adventures ahead!

Ways I’ve thought I might die in Australia this week: caught in a wildfire, drowned in a flash flood when rain came in epic proportions, struck by lightening, eaten by a crocodile after the boat was sunk by a tree that had been hit by lightening, overly keen crocodile grabbing one of my limbs that was too close to the side of the boat and dragging me under, drowned in a flash-flooded cave, killed by a not particularly venomous tree snake because I’m weak, of heat stroke in my burkini, death by spider bite, death by heart attack having imagined a giant spider just crawled over my foot, cold immersion syndrome from swimming in cold water after getting used to bathing in essentially bathwater temperatures

A trip back to my religious roots

Sorry for the lateness of this post. Very unlike me, I like to be on time. Ive had time to write but I kept forgetting or being too tired to regale y'all with my tales from yonder part of the world. So Poland is the destination of the day. We left three days ago now as we're in Budapest in Hungary and heading to Serbia this evening on another tastey night bus, yay. The two stops of our Poland trip were Wroclaw and Krakow. Both beautiful cities. Both very cheap. Ideal eh? Wraclaw was the slightly smaller and less touristy of the two. A good place to start the trip. We got there early afternoon, the weather was pretty bleak and the city (from the bus ride in looked... Ok I suppose... Read "ok" as pretty butterz really). We got off and walked for the hostel. Still little to be enthused about. Having checked in and finished off the pasta it was time for the inner tour guide inside me to come to fruition. I was in my element. A map in hand, lots of information and history and a keen student, perfect. First stop, the synagog. A nice building with some poignant displays about the Jewish descrimination throughout Poland. A heavy start to the tour. We ploughed on however, to the real meat of the tour. The town centre. A cacophony of colours, buildings, history and gnomes. Yeah there's 400 stone gnomes dotted around the city, lol. The buildings were beautiful, all different colours, all different styles, all mad cool. Even the McDonalds, the money changers and the pharmacies were in ginormous gorgeous buildings. A chocolate box town you could say. The map we were given outlined an old town walk we could so with each stop having a handy section explaining the relevance of the separate places. It was sick. And informative. My inner history teacher was loving it. After more wanderings and more architecture and A LOT of churches the tour neared its conclusion. Wed even seen an ossoleum I believe it was called (still dont really know what it was, but nevertheless the architecture was outstanding). The final stop was a wee market selling an odd variety of items. Flowers, ok. Sweets, ok. Pastries, ok. Urns. Sorry? Yes urns. Like four stalls selling urns. Hmmmm. Bit morbid. Anyhow the next day we got some proper polish food there (not in an urn) dirt cheap. That reminds me. Poland is very cheap. Shock. I think i have known this for years since I knew what Poland was. Everyone has told me how cheap it is. All of my knowledge told me how cheap it is, yet still. I was shocked evrrytime I realised just how cheap stuff was. A six pack of beer 40c. Like what?!?! Its cheaper, by a lot, to buy beer than water. Fine, you've convinced me I'll drink a beer. Big doughnuts 70c. Hostel super cheap. Bus super cheap. Food super cheap. Basically Poland was extremely good for the Wallet, better than Budapest for sure. Hopefully Serbia goes back to nice cheap prices again. Pray for cheapness. Our other day of fun in wraclaw was spent exploring the cathedral island just north of the old town. Disclaimer its not actually an island. As per the name though there was lots of churches. Yay more churches. All amazing, all massive and beautiful, all churches. Its mad how a country can be so poor throughout it's history and still put so muchomey into something so unnecessary and wrong (in my opinion) as churches. How many can you possibly need in one town, in one little bit of town. I dunno. Whatever, anyway it made a good looking day of sightseeing for us. Like I said, lots of big and lush buildings. On to Krakow. A more popular touristy city. Still similar however to wraclaw. Colourful buildings. Lots of churches. And a castle oo, very cool. It was the site that we witnessed england losing to Belgium for the second time. Great. The site of a momentous moment in table football history. Let me set the scene. Pult sees the table and exclaims her prowess at the game in no uncertain sense of confidence. Matthews's ears prick. Table football. He is even worse at containing his confidence. "I am so sick at that" is the exact response. This takes pukt by surprise. She looks anxious, has she bitten off more than she can chew..? We will see. They wait patiently by the table waiting for two amateurs to finish. A feeble warm up. Akin to having Selena Gomez being the warm up act for rolling stones. Incomparable and decidedly underwhelming when you imagine the quality of the next act, match. They finished. Tension was high. Few words were exchanged and we approached the battleground. Eyes were made and the match begun. An immense affair. Long rallies, goal line saves, pressurised defence and some silky, penetrative attacks. It was amazing. Nothing like this table had ever witnessed previously. This best of three match up was to be an epic. Matthews edged the first one in a ridiculously tight first round. But regardless of the closeness Matthews took this one 9-0. Next. It was the same affair again. So close, such good rallies but you could see in pults Eyes, her body language and her words. She was raging. Her game became more rash and Matthews's defence. It remained impenetrable. Another close fought match. Another 9-0 win. The final match. The decider. A huge moment. There was a crowd of three watching the tensest of all matchups. Matthews had given pult some pointers (always keep the left hand on the goalie). It worked. 1-0 Matthews. 1-1. 2-1 matthews. 2-2. 3-2 matthews. 3-3. What a game. So close. End to end. Pults defence was much improved. As was her clinicality in front of goal. But then. Matthews turns up. 9-3 final score. A whitewash of gargantuan proportions. Something that will not be easily forgotten by any involved. I'd like to thank my father for all his help in my practicing. Cheers dad. It certainly came home. Pult didn't slesk speak to matthews for 20 minutes, it seemed their trip was destined for an early finish. But they rallied and ate a lovely baguette thing. Anyway back to ramblings about Krakow. Next up was a wander thru the Jewish quarter. An edgy, hipster, cool area. Lots of bars, shops and ice cream stalls. A nice wander I'd say with more buff buildings and cool artwork. To finish our time off in Krakow we heading to Schindler's factory. It was very full and busy. Shock. It was nice and very informative but not very well designed. Too much information and not enough relevance slash it wasn't laid out in an easily consumable mannor. We enjoyed it but it didn't live up to the hype sadly and didn't tell us kich about Schindler specifically. More about the Jewish problem in Poland as a whole. Neverthe less still interesting. So you'll be hearing from me soon maybe tonight if I get my game right and I'm not too lazy. Until then. Goodbye. G.

Lonely death

Hello. It has been roughly 8 months. Since forensic, I have done psychiatry, obstetric & gynaecology, neurology, opthalmology, and dermatology. Right now I am doing internal medicine.

I haven’t been updating this blog at all LOL I guess in a way clinical years don’t really “stress” me out as I thought it would. It’s tough yes, but it is manageable. In a way. I have done many things I’m not proud of.

But right now, I want to just write what i feel just to rant and destress. And this is about the experience during my night shift in internal medicine just a few days ago.

There was a patient. An old lady of 85 years old. She had been sick for months, and she was admitted to the hospital do the depressed consciousness with suspected sepsis. She was not doing well. During my night shift, her condition deteriorated and when I took my friend’s shift at midnight, her vital signs had progressed to worse. High temperature of 40C, tachypnea of 48/min, decreasing heart beats and lowering of blood pressure. I have seen this before. I know that she was dying and it was only a matter of time. 

Previous to that, I have only seen death directly like that once before and it.. was.. eye-opening in a way. But that one didn’t hit me like this one I witnessed. Maybe this time it was because I was dehydrated and sleep-deprived, or maybe it was for some other reason, but this time, as I was monitoring her vital signs every 15 minutes, what I felt was sadness.

Because it is sad to witness her on her deathbed, only being surrounded by one grandchild and another young man that was not even her blood-related. It is sad knowing--according to the grandchild presented--that she had other grandchildren other than him who don’t live farawar. I guess I just feel sad that she passed away only being surrounded by so few of family with additional of two health personnels (me included).

I was talking about this with friends, and one said that he preferred to die alone. And of course I don’t know how she was when she was alive. maybe she was a cruel person. Maybe she was mean. But like, wasn’t it just sad that you lived and then you died without presence of loved ones? or that you lived such life that you had to die alone. Maybe I was overthinking this. She probably didn’t feel it, nor did she think about it (since she was already deep in coma when she died), but.. it was.. just heartbreaking to witness. For her. For everyone out there who died alone. For those who died alone due to the life they have been living.

My emotion was a mess.