everybody! quick! tell me what aro joy means to you <2

originnssssss who remembers origins i Loved origins

Anyone else have near-perfect executive function at work; but at home, have literally no energy or motivation to do anything except lie in a dark room, with something in or on your ears for several hours?

Okay smartass how would you fix Bingqiu if you had your way?

If you actually want to know you could do to be less of a rude little shit about it, anon, but all right.

This is not about 'fixing' anything. Bingqiu is a wildly popular ship and a lot of people enjoy the exact kind of delusional insanity these two have about each other and that's honestly great. Love it for them. Not my cup of tea though.

I think the easiest and fastest way to make them sort their shit out and maybe put them in a position where I might actually be interested in what's going on with them is to take the protagonist halo away. Maybe the System short circuits, maybe it just gets automatically turned off after the extras, don't know don't care.

A lot of Shen Qingqiu's self delusions are fueled by his unshakeable belief that Luo Binghe, being The Protagonist, is Perfectly Fine the way he is. Binghe is the Protagonist, so when there are no character development or obligatory angst events going on he is happy and healthy and a slightly charred good boy and Shen Qingqiu is The Happy Wife who dotes on his hubby and Everything Is Right In The World. Endless honeymoon with their responsibilities only coming to bother them every once in a while. And it makes it way too easy for Binghe to cover up that he's still hurt, still unstable and still insecure by what went down because Shen Qingqiu is willing to take him at face value when he presents his insecurities as just being shameless neediness for his husband. Of course he happily indulges Binghe! But that isn't really helping with the core of the problem now, does it?

Like, Binghe takes steps towards ensuring Shen Qingqiu's mental wellbeing even at the cost of his own as soon as Maigu Ridge is over when he takes him back to the sect. Shen Qingqiu tries too, in his own way (the entire segment in the tombs is all about him putting himself in very real danger for Binghe's sake) but at the same time, this is a guy who completely missed the writing on the wall that Bingge was deeply unhappy in PIDW. As long as he can hold onto his internal picture that The Protagonist Suffered A Lot But He Is Fine Now I don't think he can really offer the right kind of emotional support for Binghe to actually heal from what happened to him and move on to a healthier frame of mind.

If you take the protagonist halo away, then first of all Binghe can, you know, suck a little. Or a lot, actually. The world not making excuses for him and him being a little defanged would be good for him. He gets really nothing he actually wants from being the protagonist - Shen Qingqiu will love him anyway. Mobei-jun will still stick around to back him up and help him out, because he's still Shang Qinghua's favorite fictional son and Qinghua is happy to see Binghe happy, just, you know, somewhere way over there where he can't get jealous tsundere over Cucumber bro and maybe murder him about it. Sha Hualing is still going to be his buddy because he's her best source of human trivia and the writing inspiration for her girlfriend. Not having to be demon emperor and getting more time to spend with his husband would be a relief.

But he would have to be more aware of other people because he's not above them anymore. Maybe even forced to make a few new friends to get by. And his mask will fail and Shen Qingqiu will have to see him for what he is: just Luo Binghe, still hurt and still confused half demon, who loves him very much, but can't make sense of him and is afraid that he will be left behind or pushed away without explanation again and that's kinda Shen Qingqiu's own damn fault.

And Shen Qingqiu can't hold onto his delusions about The Protagonist. He can't willfully ignore that things are not fine with Binghe because he's not the Protagonist anymore and the world only allows that special privilege for the Protagonist. Binghe is just a guy now and he has so many heart demons he needs help with. His trauma from the abyss or Xin Mo can't be brushed off with 'oh that's just part of his blackening he's fine now' anymore. And it might need a little bit of adjusting to internalize that these problems have always been here just below the surface, but Shen Qingqiu genuinely loves Binghe and would want to help him become happier and more stable in any way he can.

Binghe becoming part of the world in a way that's one person among many - building a support network! maybe befriending new demons or actually getting to know and making up with the QJ disciples or finding common ground with LQG and becoming sparring buddies - rather than a protagonist in a sea of NPCs is a lot more interesting to me than whatever he has going on at the end of canon. And Shen Qingqiu can be there with him on that journey, because he already started unlearning the sense of unreality the System conditioned into him, but he still has a long way to go.

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Things that aren’t red flags but are flags nonetheless

goddddddddd why does the job application process force you to sound as egoistical as donald fucking trump likeeee there has never been a more qualified candidate in the history of the planet. I am the best there's ever been unlike those other burnouts and losers. no one is smarter. no one is a harder worker. i am in fact THE VERY BEST. hire me

Our mental health has been in such an interestingly terrible place for the last month or so. Genuinely kind of fascinating to watch from different internal angles....like watching the ocean ebb and flow and change temperament at random sometimes based on weather or the moon or something. Like this shit is just terrible

Desperately printing out moshang pictures to show to mdzs and tgcf mains and shouting PLEASE LOOK AT MY BOYS! THEYRE A CANONICAL MAIN MXTX COUPLE TOO JUST LIKE HUALIAN WANGXIAN BINGQIU I SWEAR while they cross the street trying to avoid me

not to be that guy, but if anything should have 24/7 member service it's banking institutions. why do i need to wait for business hours to unfuck my cards so i can buy gas???

Debating if I should go harder on the classification snob shaming. I think I will let my rant sit in drafts overnight. Make better decisions in the morning lmao.

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hi guys have some RANDOM SOUKOKU HEADCANNONS because i’m procrastinating my holiday homework lol (like i genuinely can’t bring myself to do it so i’ll just uh, cram it all before school actually starts)

contrary to popular belief, dazai is actually the good cook between the two of them :) chuuya burned down the entire kitchen once when he tried to make rice, so dazai removed his kitchen-entering privileges. dazai can actually cook well, he just enjoys seeing the shocked/scared faces of the people he serves his food to when he makes it nasty

dazai replaced their couch with a foldable couch bed because whenever he makes chuuya mad, he gets sent to sleep on the couch, and their old one was uncomfortable and not big enough for his lanky ass legs

chuuya once thought dazai was a burglar when he was drunk and smacked him in the face with a frying pan, which broke dazai’s nose. he (chuuya) cried while apologising when he sobered up

they have movie marathon nights, except they speedrun movies separately and fight to see how many more movies they can watch than the other before the clock strikes 7:00am and dazai has to go to work

when dazai did the “that’s what i love about you!” thing to chuuya when they were younger, chuuya actually wanted to punch dazai because he was so flustered. he actually went back to his room to punch his pillow and scream into it about how much he liked dazai back and how he messed up his response

chuuya likes it when dazai drives, because it’s so adrenaline inducing and it’s funny to see the looks on civilian’s faces when they speed pass them and almost crash into the lamp post

dazai’s home wallpaper is a picture of chuuya drooling in his sleep, and chuuya’s one is of dazai screaming and running away from a dog

i feel like they would both be really good at styling hair and doing makeup from kouyou’s lessons and all the infiltration missions they have to go on... although, i can picture chuuya trying to pry a bite of lipstick out of dazai’s mouth because he read the contents and tried to commit suicide by eating it lol

they have a built in wine cellar in their house (inspo from my aunt’s house lol. she has a fucking wine cellar in there stock full of expensive alcohol and there’s even a catalogue) and it’s super super cold. they have two silly fuzzy pairs of slippers, one is crab designed and the other is slug designed lol

yes ig that’s all for now :D

I was going through old screenshots in my gallery a while back and i found this

And it awakened something in me so I speedwrote this in feverish daze

decided Wren and their world's version of Elle had a kinda toxic romantic/horny fling during that campaign's timeskip - excerpt from the thing i'm writing for it under the cut

(idk if this getting posted anywhere since it is uh. definitely smut. and i don't have anywhere to appropriately and comfortably post that atm. but mostly just using it to practice writing again and i liked this little bit so sharing it hehe)

and i lie mentally to make myself feel better but that just bites me in the ass oughhh