#impulse is in the background so i'll skip over him | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

strawberry-barista · 2 months

Text

"What, me? Pfft... All right. I'll tell you a little. The name's Sanae Hanekoma. Born March 4, blood type A. I'm a Pisces, and one hip café barista, mista. I'm a big gambler. My favorite word: "windfall." "Natto" gets my tummy rumbling. As for my physical dimensions. . ."

★ Disclaimer: Unlike many, I do not assign specific years to TWEWY or to my own Hanekoma and his universe. Personally I feel each game is simply a representation of the time in which it was created and do not attempt to use technology or similar context clues to determine the year. Therefore, such elements are based on whatever reads best at the time, and Hanekoma's zodiac is based on his personality. ★

⚅ — TLDR — ⚅

Sanae Hanekoma is an angel that watches over Shibuya as its acting Producer. He’s laid back and doesn’t often lose his cool, but he takes his job very seriously.

⚅ — Table of Contents — ⚅

Use this to skip ahead to information you want to read.

⚀ General Information

Name

Nicknames

Age

Date of birth

Zodiac

Gender/Pronouns

Orientation

Race/Species

Hair/Eye Color

Height

Weight

Scars

Body Modification

Style

⚀ Personality

Positive Traits

Negative Traits

General Mood

Greatest Joy

Greatest Fear

Motto

General Description

⚀ Habits and Hobbies

Likes

Dislikes

Favorites

Spending Habits

Tics

Hobbies

⚀ Background

Childhood

Adolescence

Young Adulthood

Adulthood

Death and Afterlife

⚀ Abilities

Angel

Noise

Human

⚀ Relationships

Overview

Romance

Family

Important individuals

⚀ Canon Events

No subcategories

⚀ Links

Headcanons

Musings

Desires

Aesthetics

— ★ ⚄ ★ —

⚅ — General — ⚅

⚀ Name: Sanae Hanekoma

⚀ Nicknames: Mr. H, H-Man, Fuzzface, Coffee Man, Pops, Tito

⚀ Age: 152 (physically 36)

⚀ Date of Birth: March 4

⚀ Zodiac Signs: Pisces, Wood Horse

⚀ Gender/Pronouns: Male, He/him

⚀ Orientation: Panromantic Demisexual

⚀ Race/Species: Japanese Human-ascended Angel

⚀Hair/Eye Color: Black/Black

⚀ Height: 175 cm (5'9")

⚀ Weight: 120 lbs.

⚀ Scars/Marks/Etc: Hanekoma has very small, mostly unnoticeable scars over the majority of his body from regular bumps, scrapes, and accidents that occurred during his life. One feather on his wings is smaller than the others from where it had been pulled out many times over. He has a sizable scar on his leg from being shot by Apichisi.

⚀ Body Modifications: Hanekoma has a blue and red tribal tattoo wrapping around his upper left arm resembling his noise form. He also has regular ear piercings.

⚀ Style: Hanekoma visited a casino once and was so enamored by the uniforms there he decided to just start emulating the dress. But doing so properly was still a little too restrictive, so now he wears oversized shirts and doesn't button anything all the way. For shoes, he always wears sandals for maximum comfort. He's always got an expensive watch on his wrist, but these days he's taken to wearing earrings as well.

⚅ — Personality — ⚅

⚀ Positive Traits: Compassionate, loyal, creative, affectionate, brave, intelligent, open-minded

⚀ Negative Traits: Selfish, impulsive, impatient, stubborn, obsessive, greedy

⚀ General Mood: Relaxed, content

⚀ Greatest Joy: Creation, meeting people

⚀ Greatest Fear: Losing the city/his loved ones

⚀ Motto: "Enjoy every moment." and "The world ends with you."

⚀ General Description: Hanekoma has an easy-going personality and a generally happy disposition. It’s incredibly difficult to rile him up in any regard, and he will often simply let insulting or hurtful comments roll off of his back. He may come off as if he doesn’t take anything seriously, but in fact he is incredibly perceptive and analyzing. He has a tendency to take people under his wing, especially if he can see in them the potential for a lot of personal growth. This most often comes in the form of protecting players from shady dealings during the Reaper’s Game. He can sometimes have a parental attitude towards others, but he has no trouble at all with pushing people to their limits if it means they might reach a breakthrough in their character.

⚅ — Habits and Hobbies — ⚅

⚀ Likes: Coffee, gambling, new experiences, meeting new people, long conversations, Shibuya, art in all forms

⚀ Dislikes: Close-mindedness, extended isolation, threats to the city, a lack of personal growth

⚀ Favorites: The colors red and black, jazz and hip hop music, Haruto Abe's house blend coffee, the word windfall, natto, money, poetry

⚀ Spending habits: Excessive spender, but very careful with his money. Gambling can sometimes be the exception, but these days he leaves his cards at home to limit his gambling.

⚀ Tics: Rubbing/holding the back of his neck, rolling a pair of dice in his hand, running his fingers through his hair, tugging his chin

⚀ Hobbies: Hanekoma seems to run a café as a primary business, but in fact this is a hobby of his. He also works as a multi-talented artist that dips his hands in almost every form of art from graffiti to music to fashion design. Hanekoma takes a deep pleasure from being an active source of growth and change in his city and does so primarily through his work as CAT. More recently, Hanekoma had learned how to tattoo, and had a tattoo parlor that he runs as a hobby as well. Appointments can be made by anyone, but the business is not advertised at all.

⚅ — Background — ⚅

⚀ Childhood: Hanekoma was born and raised in Shibuya by two loving and supportive parents. His family was always lower income, though, so they never had a glamorous or fruitful existence. During summers Hanekoma would go into the country where his grandparents lived. Death was introduced early in life with the passing of his grandfather, and he was taught to accept the natural course of life. As a student, he was charismatic and did well on his work, but he would skip out unnoticed when he thought he could get away with it. He never caused a lot of trouble, but he always bent the rules as much as possible.

⚀ Adolescence: Hanekoma was a stressed teenager, but he never showed it to those around him. He began to live to please his parents and teachers, but he yearned to experience life his own way as well. Both of his grandparents now passed, he no longer took summers in the country and instead spent his free time exploring and learning Shibuya in and out. He fell in love with the city, but he also instilled in himself a wanderlust.

⚀ Young Adulthood: As a young adult, Hanekoma began to fear the retaliation from his parents for not going into a university, and so he quickly moved away from home as soon as he could. He lived by himself and spent his days living a fairly closed in life until the day his mother called him to inform him his father was dying. He rushed home immediately, and finally he made amends with them just a few days before his father's passing, learning that he'd never had any reason to fear in the first place. He lived with his mother afterwards, but she passed mere months after his father. After this he began traveling with a gaggle of friends he'd made over the years, eager to fill the void his parents left behind. It was through this venue that he was introduced to casinos, and he became addicted to gambling. He visited a casino wherever he went and lost more and more money, until he couldn't afford to travel anymore. Still obsessed with gambling, he began spending his money in pachinko parlors and illegal gambling dens.

⚀ Adulthood: Hanekoma wasted away all of his money until he could no longer support himself, and he found himself on the streets and struggling just to exist. He spent many days in alleyways and abandoned buildings. Having worked up quite a debt, he often found himself being attacked and was always on the alert, though any time he could get money he usually found himself playing street craps with it or in some other gambling den. This carried on until one particular winter he nearly died from the elements alone and was approached by an old man offering shelter. As much as he wanted to refuse, he knew he didn't have that luxury and finally gave in. The man, named Haruto Abe, took him into his home and got Hanekoma back on his feet. Therapy, a job at his own café, training in learning how to support himself, and the love and support he hadn't seen since his parents. Hanekoma did pick himself back up and went on to open his own café, Wildkat, and slowly healed into a person that loved Shibuya once again.

⚀ Death and Afterlife: Hanekoma met his end at the hands of a man he used to borrow money from. In the end his old gambling habits caught up to him anyway. Hanekoma fought to the end, but his opponent was in possession of an illicit firearm and determined not to let him get away with his life this time. Hanekoma entered his Game a little bleary, but not without help. Abe, much to Hanekoma's surprise, was able to find him right after his registration into the Game and give him pointers, with the explanation that he had a sixth sense which allowed him to see into the UG. Hanekoma followed Abe's instructions expressly and was able to win his Game, allowing him to become a reaper (per Abe's suggestion). From there Hanekoma quickly rose in rank, casually raking in more and more souls. All the while Abe kept feeding him secrets about Composerhood and the Higher Plane and angels, priming him for the position of Producer. Once Hanekoma finally reached his ascension, he was offered the position of Producer in lieu of Composer and he took it. Abe disappeared directly after this and wouldn't be seen again for many years.

⚅ — Abilities — ⚅

⚀ Angel: As an angel, Hanekoma has the ability to see and interact with the RG, UG, and HP at any given time. He also has the ability to scan living humans, players in the Reaper’s Game, and reapers. He can jump from one universe to another. Hanekoma has knowledge of taboo noise and refinery. He will not use these abilities unless pushed to extremes, however. And finally, Hanekoma has the ability to imprint on both people and players. The most common way for him to do so is through his art and tattoo work.

⚀ Noise: Hanekoma has a noise in the form of Panthera Cantus, which act as two entities with separate abilities. Leo Cantus is fast and teleports away when hit directly. Tigris Cantus can create clones of herself and can only be hit through her shadow, not her actual body.

⚀ Human: Just through his physical body, Hanekoma has considerable skill in street fighting, and he often chooses to do most of his fighting through this method (genuine quarrels, as opposed to testing an individual, in which he would use his noise form).

⚅ — Relationships — ⚅

⚀ Overview: Hanekoma makes friends easily. That being said, he also tends to keep people at arm’s length without them really realizing it. He says very little about himself while working to get to know others on a deeply personal level, earning the trust of many despite keeping himself a secret. He enjoys being social and making new friends, and he understands the power personal bonds can have on society as a whole. He actively encourages friendship, but he will never seek to deepen a bond any further than that.

⚀ Romance: Romantic relationships are, for the foreseeable future, strictly non-canon for this blog. Hanekoma is in a romantic relationship with himself, literally, as far as his canon is concerned. However, non-canon ships are available to plot and write.

⚀ Family: Hanekoma has no biological children, but he has a few canon familial ships. The first is his Composer, Joshua (@kingsmedley), whom he treats like his son. The second is a young reaper named Joel (@mundanemiseries), whom teeters back and forth from being like a nephew to being like another son. There is also Sho Minamimoto (@the-grim-heaper), whom Hanekoma considers a child of his even if he has no solid, concrete evidence that Sho feels the same way.

⚀ Important Individuals: Haruto Abe (@falseapostle) is the man that took Hanekoma in and is an angel. Hanekoma treated him as a parent in his living life and as a mentor, but after his return they grew a closer, more romantic relationship. Now that they are separated, both physically and emotionally, Hanekoma has forgiven him but doesn't interact with him at all. Raizen (@fangedstories) is Hanekoma's warden angel, an angel that checks up on him and makes sure he isn't breaking angel law. Apichisi (@catncore) and Eanas (@dandybarista) are older angel counterparts from another universe. While interactions are largely non-canon, these two have played roles in significant canon events. Similarly, their Joshua (@the-composer) has also participated in some of these events. Hope (@hopeful-hugz) is a character that is entirely non-canon for Hanekoma, however is still important to some canon events. When speaking with other characters that have non-canon relationships and interactions with Hope, they may come up in conversation. Otherwise, Hanekoma's secondary therapy works much differently.

⚅ — Canon Events — ⚅

⚀ Hanekoma and Joshua have had multiple falling outs, the last of which resulted in Joshua going to therapy and learning how their codependency was making them both unhealthy. As a result, Joshua and Hanekoma almost never come into contact anymore, for the sake of earning independence from one another. To this day, however, Hanekoma has never been so close or so attached to any other person, and even now he will put Joshua over any other person in his life.

⚀ Hanekoma met Apichisi and Eanas while traveling and refused to take no for an answer when he tried getting in their business. The intention was to help, but the push resulted in an altercation with the universe's Joshua, which then resulted in a deeply traumatizing battle with Apichisi. Shortly after this he also exchanged words with Eanas which led to his being banned from the universe altogether. Over the time of his absence he healed, and he made amends with the universe, but he still occasionally has nightmares related to the fight with Apichisi. In this altercation Hanekoma was shot with an angelic bullet that disabled his ability to heal. This is where he received the scar on his leg, a mark where the bullet once was.

⚀ Hanekoma received an arm tattoo from Apichisi during one of his visits. He imprinted on the tattoo so Hanekoma now feels his presence at all times. Apichisi then taught him how to tattoo on others as well, effectively allowing him to take up the occupation in his own universe.

⚀ Apichisi taught Hanekoma how to preen his own feathers and preen the feathers of others. Before this point Hanekoma didn't touch them at all. To this day his wings are extremely sensitive because of this, but he does preen himself regularly now.

⚀ Hanekoma developed a crush on Eanas, and it helped to cause the events of the banning situation. Canonically, he has moved past this and now remains romantically involved with himself, but non-canon threads playing on this may still occasionally pop up.

⚀ Haruto Abe reappeared in Hanekoma's life, making the excuse that he'd been unable to visit beforehand. He began manipulating Hanekoma, making him believe that he was harmless and merely misinterpreted while threatening and mistreating everyone in Hanekoma's life. Abe continued this farce with the intention of isolating Hanekoma to the point of him returning to the Higher Plane for reconditioning. But the longer he stayed in Shibuya the more attached he became to Hanekoma's loved ones. In the end, he could no longer continue the ruse and chose to end it. Hoping to make Hanekoma hate him and earn his own exorcism, Abe ripped a feather from Hanekoma's wing. Joshua attempted to exorcise him, but only succeeded in cutting him off from the Higher Plane. Abe was transferred to Shinjuku of Apichisi and Eanas's universe. For a time after this, Hanekoma attempted to pull the feather any time it tried to come in, but eventually he allowed it to heal. Ever since this, this particular feather has always grown in shorter than the others of its like.

⚀ Hanekoma began going to therapy. ★ In compatible threads, Hanekoma attends therapy at Hope's medical facility STM, where therapists have multiversal licenses that allow them to work with angels. ★ In all other threads, Hanekoma attends therapy at a regular office, and he simply avoids talking about forbidden subjects, choosing to translate them into situations he can talk about legally (e.g. explaining the feather incident as pulling out a good chunk of his hair instead of a feather).

⚅ — Links — ⚅

⚀ Headcanons

⚀ Musings

⚀ Desires

⚀ Aesthetics

7 notes · View notes

reflingthefox · 8 months

Text

The fun thing about my current Tango of the Tek variety brainrot is that I remember being uninterested.

I mean, conceptually I remember being uninterested in all of them - the whole hermit-life-etc experience is a crash course over three months at this point, and my previous brainrots are still here. But some people were for me like "I don't know em, then I love em", some people existed on my background long enough for me to go "ah. you're here. you're cute. I'd probably read a fic about you".

The first time me even acknowledging the name Tango (why the fuck do I remember it) is reading the Last Life text recap. At this point I watched like what, ten animatics and five minutes of actual footage, if I knew names except Grian and Mumbo, I was not Aware of them, and I wanted to know what happened after the whole "we can be friends" ordeal. And my whole knowledge of minecraft arena is what - I knew there were some cool and not-so-cool guys in the past, I drew couple things for minecraft animations like 8 years ago, I've heard DSMP fandom is a hot mess. And I read and I see the life betting thing and my first instinct is to zoom in and "okay, I need to know if this Tango guy is running a scam" and later am genuinely surprised "he's not??"

...Honestly, Life text recap aren't good to get aware of names and events if you aren't already, the read didn't even make me aware of Etho or Scott or whoever. I did start to recognize the name Tango, though... and *that's* when I remembered being uninterested. I can now see the compilation and be like "oh that's Tango alright" and skip past. I can see the picture with him in a hat, go "oh, Tango. ngl this is kinda cute" and skip past. I remember skipping past the first Rancher death!! before I knew the level of relevance.

I... don't remember when I start being interested, though.

I will say Chrisrin's Tango design jits the all buttons of cute to me, and I disyinctively remember liking it. I remember I start liking Impulse, and so Tango is on my orbit more often. I see the Space Man animatic and go a little "ouch". There is Something Happening, and I really, really can't track what and why.

I can't track how do I end up at ranchers tag late in the night, reading every fic with nice summary.

I'm acutely aware what happened *there*, though. The "everywhere, everything" fic by birrdie happened. It swept me off my feet, waited for me to get back up and acknowledge how powerful it is and go reread it, and struck me down dead. If you use phrases like "scarian have never left the desert", then this ref has never left the winter pharmacy. The fic has changed something in me, and that's forever, and I'll be surprised if I ever return to it and don't cry.

I'm... pretty sure all the Tango content I watched right after it was to soothe the pain. I'm also sure that now I was receptive enough to cling to his energy, his sounds, his smarts, and be able to love it, not skip past.

Honestly, no regrets. This is ultimately what I needed.

#ref rambles

8 notes · View notes

raven-at-the-writing-desk · 2 years

Note

Hi,love your work and thoughts behind them.I was wondering if you would answer a few questions.You can skip any if your uncomfortable.

1: Favorite cliche or scenario to write for.

2:What got you into Twst.

3:Any other fandoms your involved with.

4:Who do you hope to voice any character in the upcoming Twst anime.

5:Is there any topic you want to write for ,but don't have the you can pull it off well

6: Thoughts on Grim.

7:Any things you want more of.

8:Are you into the Obey Me fandom

9:If so are you excited about season 4.

10: favorite flower.

That is all have a good day.

I don't know, 10 questions seems like more than "a few" to me--

My responses get a little lengthy, so I'll slap them under a cut!

1. I don't have anything specific in mind, but what I enjoy writing the most are character-focused pieces where the conflict is one's inner turmoil or coming to terms with one's own emotions instead of something physical. (To clarify, I do NOT mean pining or anything romantic here, I mean just a character growing and changing over time from impactful life experiences like Overblotting or losing a friend.) I feel like self reflection is very important, and something that's not often explored because it's abstract and doesn't have a clear answer or a definitive ending. Personally, I really like the open-endedness of these kinds of pieces, as they help me really analyze and understand the characters on a deeper level.

2. I wouldn't consider myself a Disney fan, but I do really enjoy Toboso-sensei's art style and storytelling! I had heard rumors online that she was working on a new project with Disney (which turned out to be Twisted Wonderland), and I've been following it since.

3. I play some other gacha games (since it helps curb the temptation to impulse pull in TWST), and I enjoy various shows/anime and manga/books, but I'm not actually that involved in other fandoms. I'm generally a casual fan that just sits and quietly enjoys content from the sidelines.

4. I mean, I thought the current VAs would just be reprising their roles for the anime? I don't really care to remember or to follow VAs (or celebrities in general), so I don't have anything to add.

5. I think that with enough time and research, I could write anything if I was interested enough in the concept. However, there are certain topics that I would like to avoid writing at all costs (not because I think I can't write them well, but because they are personally triggering). You can find a list of them in my writing request rules.

6. Honestly, I don't know why people find him to be so annoying (well, maybe except for his voice). The only reasonable explanation I can think of is maybe players are annoyed that Grim "steals the spotlight" from MC/Yuu, but I don't mind that because I think it's pretty funny. I really enjoy Grim's snark. He's not as mean-spirited as Ace, but he knows what he wants and how he's going to get it, even if it sometimes backfires on him. Grim is basically my first companion in Twisted Wonderland; he's been with me through it all, the good and the bad. He's really the one I truly consider to be my friend, not Malleus. In fact, I'm way more attached to Grim than I am to Malleus 😂 Grim being a cute, fluffy cat also helps his case, since I really like cats!

7. I'm always hungry for more TWST world and family lore! I'd really like a "parent-teacher conference" event where we get to meet each of the boys' parents and siblings! It would be super interesting to see what the students' dynamics with the family members are like, and how their families would react to hearing about how they're performing in school. It would really help to highlight the differences in each boy's upbringing and background, from healthy relationships to unhealthy and even toxic ones. Also, it'd be hilarious to see Lilia pull up as Silver's guardian--

8. I tried out Obey Me when it first came out, and it... well, it wasn't for me. That's not to say the game is bad, but it just wasn't to my tastes. I was expecting Obey Me to be something that it wasn't, so of course I was disappointed when it didn't meet those expectations. More power to you if you enjoy it, though! I can definitely see why it appeals to a certain demographic or why it's good as just some nonsensical fun. Here are my general thoughts on Obey Me:

The characterization and the jokes seemed repetitive. There's only so many times they can joke about Mammon being "the dumb one" or Beel eating so much before it loses its magic. There's also the problem of each boy being defined almost entirely by their "sin" or really basic character tropes (like Asmodeus's narcissism) rather than having any character outside of that.

In my opinion Barbatos, Simeon, Luke, Solomon, Diavolo, etc. are much better characters than the 7 brothers, because they don't have a single sin to rely on to be their entire personality. I stopped playing before those guys became "playable", so I'm a little sad that I never got to grab them.

I feel extremely weird about the plot twist about who the MC really is, and how all the brothers continue to aggressively hit on the MC despite knowing their true identity. Besides that, I felt like the main story and the events never took themselves seriously. I would have preferred it more if there was something more at stake instead of being 98% fluff.

If you hadn't told me the characters were demons, I'd have thought they were just generic pretty boy designs. Like... nothing about Asmodeus's looks screams "lust" to me, nothing about Satan's looks screams "wrath", etc. Meanwhile, you can take one look at Idia's gloomy face and stooped pose and immediately guess what type of personality he has. I felt like there was so much potential with the characters being angels and demons, but it was never capitalized on and therefore went to waste.

I never understood why everyone thought Lucifer was so hot? Maybe I just have shit taste--

Gameplay-wise, the events and new cards were too frequent. It was a very "pay to win" model, which required constant attention without allowing you enough time to properly save or to plan for new card drops if you didn't spend a cent on the game.

I'm not a fan of the general art style, but those little shadow demon dudes are super cute!

It's hilarious that the anime adaptation depicts the MC as a sheep ashdasidasibdagofuyabsdais;basd--

9. I don't know what "season 4" means, sorry!

10. Lilacs, gardenias, jasmine, and peonies are my favorites smell-wise, but I like all flowers. They're very pretty and calming to look at.

#question #notes from the writing raven #Obey Me #Grim #MC #Yuu #Lilia Vanrouge #Silver #Malleus Draconia

36 notes · View notes

hoopdiddies · 5 years

Text

I'm Not Over You // Ben Hardy x Reader (Part 4)

A/N: I was on vacay for a while and I had a hard time thinking the plot through but this could work. If you want to be tagged, just ask me uwu

Summary (for the entire series Ofc) : You had always loved Ben ever since you two met in university and became the best of friends. That feeling went out like a candle flame when the two of you parted ways until he re-entered your life...but this time with someone who has already occupied his heart.

Word count: 2148

Tags: None

Warnings: Mentions of drinking. And some angst, yet again *sigh*

Part 3

Part 2

Part 1

Parallel to the nature of the grimace present on your face shrouded by the umbra of the umbrella, the thunderclouds become bleaker and unwelcoming, complimenting the harsh pour of the rain on the city. In your mind, it could just get worse.

You tighten your grasp on the stem of your umbrella, the pressure of your grip making the veins in your wrist visible. To think you were enthused to spill the news to him, only to end up feigning the real one because you couldn't bring yourself to accept what must be.

You know he loves you, he loves you so much. He tells you 24/7. But that love is purely limited to hugs, small arguments, spontaneous fits of laughter, gentle pats on the back and forehead kisses. Compared to the almost spiritual connection he has with his fiancee. You've known and been around him longer than you could remember and yet, you're always several steps behind.

Well how else does platonic love compare to something romantic and sexual?

You stop in your tracks just half way through the wet sidewalk and stare at your reflection on a puddle beneath you. The tears dripping from your cheeks making bigger ripples on the puddle in contrast to the ones made by the rain. You sniffle, wiping your eyes quickly with your sleeve.

You hear a faint ring from your pocket and pull out your phone, seeing Lucy's name flash on the screen. You swipe the answer button and go on walking along the moist pavements.

"Hey Luce!" You blurt to hide the cracks in your voice.

"Y/N! Where are you right now? I just got back from a photoshoot and I want to hang out with you!" She giggles through the line and you keep your eyes ahead.

"Well I'm walking back home-"

"In the rain? You could get sick!"

"Lucy, relax. I'm covered up."

She sighs in relief, chuckling at her little mistake. "Sorry there. But mind if I stop by at your place?"

You don't think twice before answering, feeling the need to have some company. "Of course. Hurry up, I'm almost home." You aren't though, you're a dozen blocks away from your destination but you kind of want her to be there just in time for you to...vent.

You hear an audible slam echo from the line, almost coming off as a car door slammed close. "I'm on the road, I'll see you, Y/N!" You hum in response, your mouth curving slightly to the side. "You too, Lucy. Drive safely."

She bids you adieu for the meantime and you pick up your pace along the streets, careful not to glide recklessly over moist surfaces. The rain is not going to lighten very soon, you're sure of it.

As soon as you step foot into your living room after drying off, you are welcomed by a laid-back version of Lucy seated on the couch with a can of Mountain Dew in hand. You chuckle softly at how mellow she's positioned during such a weather, even more so at her choice of beverage.

"You're late." She shakes her head at you, pretending to be upset.

You shrug out of your coat and drape it over your shoulder, trudging to her and crouching down to hug her. "I am so sorry I left almost too quickly last night though."

She pats your back, letting a 'tsk' slip past her lips. "You are lucky Gwilym was there to accompany me."

"Hmm, he's not mad at Joe and me, is he? " Pulling away, you joke a little to cheer yourself up.

"No," she takes a sip of her can and puts it on the table, "in fact he's furious." This could be a little enlightening, a chat with Lucy to shed a beam of light on your mood. You take a seat next to her and begin your conversation. It's not much except that it's full of what happened at her photoshoot, the promotions she is required to attend, a few people she's had a little beef with and apparently her planned getaway with Rami to France. The topic is almost unilateral but you always take genuine interest in everything she says. Notwithstanding the fact that she constantly groans at the mention of the situations she underwent, you both still take a laugh out of it.

It's Lucy, she's a fascinating person with a fascinating life. You sometimes even wish you had her glam and eye for fashion.

She moves a lock of her blonde hair away from her forehead and looks at you curiosly. "Okay enough about me, what went on with you this week?"

You shrug, in an attempt to recall anything at all. "Not much. New Year's was a blast and last night's party was another thing," you turn your glance to your shoes, a frail smirk ghosting on your lips, eventually turning into a hopeful beam as your acceptance into the medical school flashes in your mind, "and... I got accepted into the medical school I applied for."

Lucy's eyes snap wide open at the news. "Shut up," she grabs you by the shoulders and gapes at you with eyes sparkling like they just found a heap of treasure, "you applied for medical school?" The slight disbelief and utter amazement can never be any clearer in her voice.

You nod happily and without warning, Lucy pulls you in for a tight hug, squealing at your success. "Oh my god, that's amazing! When did you get the letter? Have you told anyone?"

"I was sent an email from the institution this morning and told my parents and Joe about it soon after."

Lucy shifts on the couch, sliding her hands over her lap. "Which medical school though?"

"It's outside the country."

"Have you told Ben? "

With her question still hanging in thin air, you pause for a while before turning your head to her, shaking it slowly.

"Why?"

You stand up and head for the kitchen to grab a glass of water, your action confusing Lucy. "Y/N, are you okay?" She asks and you return on cue with your glass in hand. You let out a soft exhale and descend onto the couch. "I just...dont want to make him worry."

"Worry and Ben aren't exactly two words that mingle well. Solely in the context of a great news such as your acceptance."

"Of course, but I don't know how long I'll be gone." You notice your voice dwindle down to a whisper with the cast of your gaze to the side. The look on your face is deciphered by Lucy who's somehow adept at reading expressions, the blank that is your face making it easier for her.

And she suddenly knows what those furrowed brows mean. "There's something you're not telling me, Y/N. Just say it. I mean...even if you don't say it, I already hinted at it." She slides a hand over yours and you slowly turn to her, your expression becoming mildly stark. Of course she'd have a guess and it's only fair that she knows, she could help you get over it.

Your lips part but quiver as you try to find the right words. "I love him."

Lucy's gentle hold turns into a light squeeze, an indication of her comforting you. Her lips curve into a tender yet sad smile as she draws you in close again.

No matter how hard you're trying to let the tears fall, it just doesn't. It hurts but your tears aren't present to highlight that churning burn. Against all the odds to have them resurface in your eyes, you dip your head onto her shoulder and just squeeze your eyes shut. You mumble languidly on how it was an impulse to lie about your acceptance to Ben after he had broken the news about his engagement to you and soon after you had the thought that he would slowly forget about you once he and Rosy marry, and that your friendship wouldn't matter in the long run. As the decision that it'd be best if you go without him knowing, thinking it would make it easier for you to move on.

Lucy clears your face of your hair strands, staring at this once hidden,broken side of you. "I'm so sorry. I know this might not change a thing but you must tell him. He would never forget you, you're like the first person on his mind when he needs someone to talk to."

"Rosy's his life-"

"Y/N, don't demote yourself to a third party. You're more than what she is in his life," a brief pause from Lucy followed by a heartwarming emphasis, "you're his soulmate."

That word always meant something different to you. It involved a deep,romantic relationship but with how Lucy uttered it, it now means something entirely new. But you can't bring yourself to believe it. It's not a concept that can suture the gaping cut left in you.

With the little emotional strength left in you, you smile, launching at her with another hug as a requital to her presence during a time as this.

"I know it hurts...but- bloody, that's what love does to everyone."

--- (Apparent time skip 👀)

Amidst the hectic schedule your job has burdened you with throughout another week, never once have you faltered in between. You've gotten tons of invites to get-togethers during your weekend from friends yet out of the fear of losing all concentration on your duties, you turned them down politely. The second week of a new year means a new batch of spine-cracking, workload for everyone with jobs.

You're doing all this to save up for med school and it's something you tend to prioritize first and foremost. And regarding med school, you are to leave a month before enrollment to ensure your documents are in tacked and get served first. Since a few days before first semester arrives, enrollees would be lining up from different backgrounds and classes would be heavily filled. You have weeks left before your departure...and still, you haven't told Ben the truth...or talked to him in days, at least. For all you know, he could be on a tour, at a conference, an awards ceremony that you don't know of- certainly not the Oscars since you've been told that it's scheduled on February. He's probably busy enough to have other things in mind.

You discard the distraction and go about your business in your work area, with the intention of letting it purposefully distract you.

Minutes close to your dismissal, one of your co-workers strut in to invite you to have a drink with them. You could do no more than turn her down politely but with regards to the strain you've put yourself in with work, she insists and demands that you don't hesitate.

"But-" You try to protest, only to fail as she cuts you off. "I beg of you. Just for tonight."

"Tonight?"

"Yes."

You lightly clap your hands on the desk, springing from your chair with your head lightly tilted to one side. You turn your head to the wall clock on your far left and bob your head. "Do we leave now?"

"Most certainly. Come on!"

You haven't sped out of the building that fast with your colleagues before, not that it's not the first time but it certainly feels like it with how relieved you feel to go out. You needed a distraction from your personal ordeal and you got it, in the form of a night out for a drink.

You hit the pub that's just right across the street for the sake of convenience, half expecting your night to turn out eventful. A light buzz from your pocket stops you halfway into the entrance and slightly indisposed, you fish your phone out from your pocket, holding up your index finger at one of your colleagues to take the message you've received. They stride in ahead of you as you read the message, a little surprised to know Joe's back in London in the favor of Lucy who had asked him to come back. He's asked you out for a dinner with his friend but you tell him you're out for a drink with your colleagues, to which he replies with, "Mind if we join you then?"

And of course, you invite him over. Traipsing through the near rayless place to find your friends, hilariously realizing you're walking to the beat of the music coming from the speakers, you do a double-take at the table to your near left, quickly covering your face and speeding away to continue your search as the sight of Ben with his mates and Rosy ruins the first half of your evening.

What a distraction from a distraction.

#borhap #queen #ben hardy imagine #ben hardy x reader #ben hardy #imagine #borhap imagine #borhap cast x reader #borhap cast #joe mazzello #lucy boynton #queen band

100 notes · View notes