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malatruse · 2 years

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They did Vaughan dirty

Spoilers for the Silt Verses episodes 1-7. Posting it because I don’t trust tumblr to not eat the draft, but don’t feel obligated to read it.

What happened to Vaughan, the series’ one nonbinary character, was a small thing in a world where malevolent gods will kill you for yelling at a hole in the ground or being too good at telemarketing, but I wanted to talk about it a little bit. This is not to say that TSV is a bad series, on the contrary, it captivated me on many lone car rides, reducing the drive from a chore to a blank space where all I could remember were the words. I think it’s great when creators add diversity to their stories, and small studios often fall under much harsher criticism than large ones even when they’re trying harder (dream daddy im looking at you). This is just me trying to get my feelings out.

So. Vaughan. They’re an old friend of Carpenter’s who took an internship at an advertisement firm and went on to be a manager of god brainstorming. Then they are sacrificed to a new corporate god to inspire their friend Paige to go off and do some soul searching. They serve two purposes in the story: as the catalyst for Paige’s character growth, and as a way to link Carpenter and Paige together. The way this was accomplished, however, really rubbed me the wrong way.

I am nonbinary. As soon as I heard Vaughan was, too, I got excited. Someone like me in media! Even if they’re only mentioned in one episode it’s still pretty cool. And then they come back in episode 6 and I’m like cool! ....and then they’re tortured to death “on screen,” their role in the story complete.

This upset me for a lot of reasons, the main one being the lack of representation in most media giving me a disproportionate amount of attachment to them. After episode six, trying to fall asleep, I imagined what it would feel like to be put in a crucible and melted. (This is because I am a dramatic edgelord but I’m still going to include it as a personal anecdote.)

At first I thought, “well they said they had a plan, maybe that wasn’t them? maybe they got away?” but as time goes on it becomes clear that Paige, by pointing them out to their supervisor, has doomed them. Whatever plan they had was unable to be enacted because of the extra scrutiny. Paige has condemned her friend to death.

After the initial shock came disappointment. Vaughan was 100% of the show’s nonbinary characters, and they killed them off. Proportionally it looks very bad. Unless Whisper is nonbinary, in which case they’ve still killed off 100% of the show’s nonbinary characters.

Then Paige meets Faulkner and Carpenter and I was like oh! They have this friend in common. It’ll come up in conversation, Paige will mention Vaughan’s name, it’ll spark a conversation.... but it never happens. It almost seems like it might in episode 10... And then it’s over and Paige and Carpenter separate, reunite, separate again, and Vaughan isn’t mentioned at all.

I don’t know if there’s something I’m missing here, some piece of the puzzle I’ve overlooked that makes it all make sense, but I thought writing it all down would help. The season is over, my thoughts are out, and I don’t have to think about it anymore.

#vent post #tsv

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pidgebeifong · 4 years

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atla characters as bnha characters (part 2)

Post-redemption arc Zuko (aka thank-god-ur-not-bald-anymore) as Todoroki Shouto

if you didn’t see this one coming idk what to tell you

Daddy Issues™

emotionally scarring burn on left eye inflicted by a parent

Co-Presidents of the Shitty Dads Club

gorgeous, sweet, out of ur league

have to be at least friendship level 3 to unlock Mysterious Tragic Backstory

fire powers that they wouldn’t use/lost the ability to use for a while

hot (both literally and figuratively)

the favourites of their fandoms

Socially Awkward™

both have a sweet & kind friend who’s partly the reason they’re not angsty and emo anymore, everyone say thank you midoriya for giving us the todoroki we have today (give me platonic!zukaang/tododeku or give me death)

started out friendless and now they have like six bffs

‘farther is for physical distance, further is for metaphorical distance, and father is for emotional distance’

Pre-redemption arc Zuko (aka what-the-fuck-is-that-ponytail) as Bakugou Katsuki

weird hair

Angery Bois™

im sorry they both look like really angry pomeranians i can’t take them seriously

‘you wanna go?! you wanna fuckin go?!’ tell me that isn’t the entirety of bakugou’s dialogue summed up in two sentences

‘let me see what you have’ ‘A KNIFE’ ‘NO’

torments the hell out of peace-loving main protagonist & hunts them down

both have had their lives saved (kinda? at least deku tried) by the main protagonist when they were still assholes

have father figures (kinda? does all might count?) who just want them to stop being fucking assholes and make the right decisions for once but do these dumbasses listen? no

have kidnapped someone/been the one who got kidnapped

100% would recommend anger management therapy. pls for the love of god sort out ur deep-rooted issues

repressed gays

zuko gets a pass bc of his emo tragic backstory but honestly baku was such a jerk to deku in szn 1 for literally no reason. fuck you bakugou

Azula as Dabi (aka Todoroki Touya, we all know it’s true at this point)

yes i have a special place in my heart for villains with blue fire and tragic backstories, what about it

figuratively and literally hotter than their siblings (don’t @ me y’all know it’s true)

the ‘evil’ sibling one of whom was actually just misguided and whose redemption arc i’m still waiting for, but i’m not going to elaborate on that bc the way the atla writers handled azula just makes me mad & I’ll end up talking forever about it

fathers majorly fucked them up (ozai was abusive to azula, fight me)

kinda psycho

god if dabi really does turn out to be a todoroki and still doesn’t get a redemption arc i am suing. my heart cannot take this pain again

their most popular ships are both gay with a person who’s the complete opposite of them and have/will inevitably betray them in the end (tyzula, hot wings. manga readers know what i’m talking about but i don’t think dabi/hawks is too popular a ship with anime-only fans yet)

Ty Lee as Ashido Mina

pink!!! pinkity pink pink

bubbly and fun, peppy attitudes

‘be gay do crimes’

actually incredibly dangerous and formidable even though they don’t really look like it (can you imagine fighting someone who can literally paralyze your entire body with a few punches? or shoot honest-to-god acid at you? we stan two (2) queens)

really flexible and good at sports (ty lee’s acrobatics, mina’s hip hop dancing)

both part of iconic squads (ozai’s angels, the bakusquad)

both their squads have a kinda mean leader (azula, bakugou)

don’t really take criticisms too harshly and always brush off mean comments by azula or bakugou with a smile

yeah i don’t really have a lot to say about them bc they don’t have a lot of screen time (we were robbed) but they’re cool

Mai as Aizawa-Sensei

110% done with ur shit

Did Not Sign Up For This

the OG emos

*drives up to mcdonalds with ten kids in the backseat clamouring for fries, orders one (1) black coffee and leaves*

every day their will to live dies a little more

neither of them have bending/powers that are useful in combat so they’ve both learnt to be really good at fighting the traditional way, without bending or quirks

just let them sleep ffs

kinda hot when they’re fighting

dragged into dangerous situations by the main characters when they just want to mind their own business and take a nap

‘wake me up (wake me up inside)’

Uncle Iroh as All Might

father figures

cheerful, jovial, always there to save the day

very powerful & strong

kinda old

both have antagonistic relationships with the ‘abusive fathers in power’ in each of their respective series

you probably can’t tell but i really don’t like iroh (even tho i adore all might) so it’s kind of hard to find good stuff to say about him, but i’m trying

give good advice that’s useless anyway bc the protagonists literally never follow it

both adopt a young boy who isn’t actually their kid but whom they have a closer relationship with than the boy’s actual dad has with the boy

train that young boy to become their successor

Fire Lord Ozai as Endeavour (aka human pieces of shit)

FUUUUUUCCCCKKK YOOOUUUU

burn in hell

apologise to your fucking kids

why was end*avour given a redemption arc in the manga that’s just as bad as h*ggar getting that stupid fucking redemption arc in voltron, makes absolutely zero (0) sense

good at one (1) thing and it’s giving their kids emotional trauma that they’ll have to carry around for the rest of their lives

have stupid beards and moustaches that makes them look like paedophiles

being indirectly/directly responsible for burns on their sons’ left eyes

hold on a sec i’ll be right back just give me a moment, i gotta go punt these dickheads into the mfing sun

if they were dying of hunger and i had a feast in front of me, i’d tell my servants to burn the leftovers

Princess Ursa as Todoroki Rei

both forced into marriages because of their bloodline/powers that would make their future kids strong

had abusive husbands who were very powerful and feared

scarred their kids (literally)

disappeared from the household while their kids were still young due to an incident where they killed/harmed a family member (ursa poisoned fire lord azulon, rei scalded shouto’s eye)

had a child/children who was/were disregarded in favour of the child who was favoured bc of their abnormally strong powers

unintentionally abusive (ursa fucked azula up bad, don’t @ me)

idk what else to say we got like two and a half seconds of screentime in total for each of them

Bonus:

Emo Zuko (like even more than normal) as Tokoyami Fumikage

professional Edgelords™ such darkness

so drama

very emo

Sparky Sparky Boom Man as Bakugou Katsuki (aka sparky sparky boom boi)

boom boom time to die

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offworldcolony · 3 years

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Zack Snyder's Justice League, 2021 - ★★★

Daddy Issues: The Movie.

I'm conflicted about the existence of this film; as an exercise in studio interference it's fascinating, as a parable of what can happen when fans rise up, it's a cautionary tale, and as the shape of things to come, it's questionable. I don't think fans should get to decide anything; hiring the correct filmmakers and giving them creative freedom would be the ideal option because you give the people what they need and never what they want. What they want, as evidenced by everything, almost always sucks and they're left unhappy anyway. And this film might be the exception that proves the rule.

And although Zack Snyder's Justice League was a film worth creating from the butchered remains of the original incarnation, it shouldn't have come at the behest of how much vitriol was cast out there in the process, and it shouldn't be a signal that a rabid and butthurt community of internet trolls that believe they deserve whatever they want, exactly as they want it, should ever influence the film industry ever again.

This should instead be a reminder to Studios that they know about as much as Marketing departments or gamblers or stock market traders: they're just pissing in the wind and when it lands in the toilet they claim it's by some kind of design of their own making and brilliance. Hire somebody good and get the fuck out of their way. At least if it's shit (like this film basically is) it is the fault of one person's vision and I'd rather have a noble and coherent failure than a luke-warm, mediocre carcass of a Frankenstein's monster made up of opinionated Suits, en-vogue and focus group-driven decisions acting only as a commercial for toys like 2017's Justice League was.

So the film itself? It's incredibly enjoyable, I had an absolute blast with my family round watching it like an old-school movie night. Is it a better movie? Yes, 100% in practically every way. Is it a good movie? Nope! But it's one person's coherent vision, I just hate that vision and I don't think he pulls it off.

Snyder constantly undercuts his own good ideas by his own execution, stumbling into his own sandcastles; some sequences have some really fantastic starts and then they're shot and edited in a way that makes me crawl inside out with cringe; singing a Nordic-style Aquaman song: great, having someone really close up sniff his jumper and sing right at us: horrific. And there's legion of these terrible choices by Snyder, usually things that don't make logical sense but mean he can do something because it's simply cool. (Martha Manhunter anyone?) But we already know by now that cool on its own isn't enough. Snyder doesn't. Having Batman say "fuck" isn't cool, it's dumb. Having Superman say a cocky (rubbish) one-liner when he saves someone from Steppenwolf is out of character, it's dumb. More than once I was able to predict what a character was going to say before they even said it. Come on, this isn't Trey Parker and Matt Stone's Team Justice League.

On the undeniable positives are the colour grading, score, the reels of added and altered material and more. Most of the added scenes are way, way better, more coherent and the film looks great actually. It does look Olympian and classic as I imagine he wanted it to, like the cave murals Diana sees. The extra character and coherence allow the jokes and interactions to breathe; Wayne is a little funnier, Diana, sadder, Cyborg, actually here for a change with something to do, and seemingly powerful, and Flash (thank god) not annoying. Even Irons' Alfred gets basically the best material and comes out of it my favourite character. Truly the Alfred of the group.

What doesn't work with this is that there's so much slow-mo that it becomes laugh-out-loud funny and goofy rather than impressive and dynamic, and in a 4-hour long film, you'd better be damn sure that amount of slow-mo is necessary, even in the slow-mo shots you can palpably feel they drag on for a few seconds too long each time.

And my god let's talk about the soundtrack. So Snyder has now consistently proven himself to be awkwardly tone-deaf to good music in all of his films. He can't pick an appropriate track, he can't pick an ironic track. Every time he does one of his patented slow-mo, nothing sequences over a full track of music (it feels like) it's so awkward I almost got up and left my own fucking house. There's like five of these.

But the action here (apart from being blasted in the eyeballs by insane amounts of bright lights) was all really genuinely good here, he's got it down, the dynamism didn't feel stodgy and CGI-ified, wasn't just a big invulnerable guy bashing someone aside for ten minutes, they fought as a team, it looked and felt fun, and at times, really tense and involving. It's a huge step up from whatever they did for the theatrical. The Amazonian stuff was motivated, gripping and grand. Anything with Steppenwolf felt imposing and had heft and tactics to it. Bravo.

Speaking of Steppenwolf, his Middle Managers and Head Office in the form of marble liquid Henchman, Darkseid and CGI Anette Benning(??!!) felt like strange meaningless additions, as did the anti-life equation shit (this is what Marvel doesn't do, they're expert-level at exposition for newcomers and easter eggs for fans combined). Darkseid looked like a troll, neither imposing nor unique or cool, and I'm not talking an ordinary troll, I mean one of those shit ones that gets turned to stone in the sun, not even a proper fighting troll. He looked like the first mini-boss encounter in a Lord of the Rings videogame. But...

But Steppenwolf looked awesome and I actually liked him here and his Simp for Daddy schtick. I laughed at him a lot, but like Synder I had a lot of endearment for him and his cute, sad, hopeful eyes. Daddy please love me! I promise I'll do better! I can't explain why he worked this time but he did. Maybe it's because the story felt interesting (dumb but at least it all made sense internally) and it felt grand in scale and scope and had stakes and whole added motivations for everybody.

Speaking of what else worked, yes I enjoyed the 4:3 aspect ratio, I thought it would just be Zack Snyder wanking himself off again (see: Justice League: Dark or whatever they'll call his upcoming Black and White version) but I kind of loved it, it was almost euphoric and actually did replicate some of what going to the IMAX felt like. I liked feeling like these colossi of comic books were towering above like statues.

What didn't work was that the chapter headings had nothing to do with the chapters at all or anything that happened in them which felt strange. Also, characters over-egg their lines as if we're dumb and keep stating the obvious in such a first draft way that I felt myself getting stupider.

One of my main gripes is if you keep trying to one-up yourself, these character do not feel understandably epic and powerful. They're all kind of idiotic and silly and po-faced and posture so much and say snappy one-liners and prance around like Chads. Snyder thinking he’s some kind of subversive genius and all that is sweet, but most of time I'm laughing at his cloying fan-service. He's the kid that keeps telling you how great he is and you don't mind because you can see he's got no friends and he's been bullied. Snyder isn't as aggressively dumb and bullish like Michael Bay is, for example, and Snyder's movies are largely coherent. But he's trying too hard and I just don't like his vision. As little elseworld graphic novels this kind of shit between Batman and Joker works, or in films like Joker you can do some out-there things, rather than in this, a mainline, flagship series.

Zack Synder is a little like a first-time Dungeons and Dragons DM trying to impress his table with all his edgelord grittiness and "vision"; He is a child that has two figurines and is smashing them together and yelling "Look! Look what I'm doing! Superman is beating everyone up! LOOK!" Zack Snyder's Justice League is simply, more than anything, endearing. That's the best way I can describe it.

Endearing.

And this film being endearing means I can't hate it, even though I think it's rubbish; because if a child builds a fortress of Lego, it's not exactly the Taj Mahal, but it is impressive. But when he knocks it all down I'm right there yelling for him to pick up all the destroyed pieces now because it can't always be playtime. A film can't just be spectacle and chaos and whatever-the-fuck-you-want. It has to be about something.

Justice League is about nothing. The Dark Knight was about Chaos in a system used to Order even if there was chaos inherent in the order. And it asked you to look at that chaos vs unbridled chaos. With both Dent and Joker as two sides of the same coin; chaos and order, and it put that paradox or that choice to the people of Gotham. It was about surveillance states, money, and sacrifice. And so much more. The Dark Knight subsequently became timely and timeless.

Justice League is about nothing and it will fade into nothing because of it. The euphoria will pass. It's OK it exists. It OK that we move past it now.

source https://letterboxd.com/offworldcolony/film/zack-snyders-justice-league/

#letterboxd #review #film #film review #diary #film diary #letterboxd diary #letterboxd film review

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krys-does-otome · 6 years

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Bae in Review: Alma, Bad Apple Wars

Alma, dearest Alma. You were my last hope in this sea of mediocrity. That I hadn’t lost my chance of this game going from okay status to good status.

You can tell by my wording that that wasn’t what happened.

If I can give this route a name, it would be called… Tomato Edgelord.

But… not in a good way.

Before getting into the nitty gritty, let’s have

First Impression:

Last Impression:

As always, spoilers down below, folks. You know the drill~

----------------------

Alma is the leader of the Bad Apples. He’s serious, intelligent, maybe a little distant at times, but I was willing to bite. He’s the type that would like, the tall, dark, silent type.

I just wasn’t expecting him to be so dark right off the bat.

Rinka is trying to escape from Mr Gas Mask and Mr. Bucket Head, so she escapes up to the roof of the building.

Admittedly not the smartest move if you’re trying to escape from someone, but whatever. It gets the story rolling, so I’m not gonna complain too much.

She happens across Alma, the Bad Apples leader, sleeping on the roof.

Again, not the most ideal spot for napping, but anime cliche, whatever.

Aren’t those doors ever locked? I mean, my goodness.

Rinka is still coming to terms with the fact that she is most likely dead and this might not necessarily be one elaborate dream when Alma approaches her.

Here’s where Tomato Edgelord makes his wonderful first impression on the new kid.

He asks her if she’s gonna jump off the roof.

Yeah. Really.

He then tells her that such an act is pointless, as you can’t leave the Academy by any normal means nor can you die, any injury heals immediately, you’re basically stuck here, sweetcakes.

He then proceeds to… demonstrate... how any injury can be instantly healed.

By summoning... his knife and…. slicing his own neck open and spurting blood everywhere.

It’s a good thing that you don’t dream in Purgatory as I’m sure Alma just gave poor Rinka nightmare fuel for a week with that little… demonstration.

Who told him that slicing his neck open was the way to go to pick up girls?

Anyway, the story proceeds as it has with the other two Bad Apple routes, Rinka finds the key in the Reapers’ Game, Rinka scores a perfect 100% on the Vexam, Sanzu’s ‘Graduation’, blah, blah, you could skip through most of this and not miss much if you’ve played either Higa or Shikishima (or both) already.

Yes, Sanzu’s Graduation too, the pivotal turning point the game, when the consequences of the Bad Apple’s rule breaking have… actual consequences.

It doesn’t change much no matter which Bad Apple route you’re on, just Alma’s route you get a neat CG of Sanzu and Yoh playing together, and that’s just about it.

I’ll talk more about it in my Otome in Review, but it’s greatly concerning how much of the routes are skippable once you’ve played your first route, on either side.

For now, I’ll just get to where Alma diverges from his Bad Apple bae counterparts, what makes him different from Higa and Shikishima.

He was in love, once.

Like, he was hard in love with a girl.

Also, this girl WASN’T Rinka.

Big shock, right? A bae with a previous love interest that isn’t the heroine.

Who knew those even existed?

Best part, she loved him too. Kudos to you, Tomato Edgelord.

Unfortunately, she also got very, very sick.

Alma doesn’t take this very well, as you can imagine. He had wanted to be with her forever, grow old together and all that cute mushy stuff.

He doesn’t get his chance, however. Because he would be understandably frustrated that the girl he loves is sick and dying, and he can’t really do anything to change that.

So he becomes a rebellious kid, taking out his frustration on bullies and gangs when need be.

He even dyed his hair red so that his sick girlfriend could see him on the school’s rooftop easier (because the school could look onto the hospital, and he can see into her room. Because that’s not concerning at ALL, NOPE).

Yeah, that tomato ain’t organic.

I was disappointed when I found out too.

Also, red was his girlfriend’s favorite color.

Anyway, his biggest regret was not being there for his girlfriend on her deathbed. Some gang had decided they had had enough of Tomato Edgelord and decided to beat him up.

By the time the beating had finished, his girlfriend was already cold dead.

He didn’t take this well.

So very not well that he was not handling his grief at all, to the point that he was making himself literally vomiting sick in regret.

Sweet sunshine child, counselors and therapists exist.

Why did no one get this kid a fucking therapist?

Please, for the love of all things good and holy, if you feel like this, seek help! Please, please, please get help!

This trainwreck only gets worse from here, folks.

This… vomit-inducing grief lasts for about a year (SERIOUSLY, WHAT THE FUCKING HELL, MAN), before he realizes that, ‘like a tape wears down over time if it’s played over and over again’, he realizes that his memories of his dead girlfriend are starting to fade. Because that’s a thing that happens when you try to recall memories repeatedly (this is also scientifically supported, the more often you recall a memory, the less clearer it becomes over time. Natural process, nothing to make a huge fuss about).

Well, there’s only one solution to fading memories.

Throw yourself off the school roof before you lose anything else.

Seriously, did literally NO ONE think to send this kid to a counselor? At the very least, a grief counselor? School counselor? Anything?

Nope, it doesn’t stop here either. I’ve got my cray cray route and I’m just fucking rolling with it!

If anyone has read my review for Shikishima’s route, I talk about the concept of your memories of your past life start to blend with the memories you make at NEVAEH Academy and how you start to confuse the two over time, the longer you stay at the academy. And I complained that it wasn’t explored enough in Shikishima’s route, as I felt it was an interesting concept, but, again, wasn’t explored to its full potential.

It’s explored more in Alma’s route. Yep.

It must really suck for people who do Alma before Shikishima.

But, it makes sense, since he’s the one that has been at the school the longest, so it’s natural to think his memories would start getting muddier over time.

It gets to the point where he starts to think Rinka is his dead girlfriend.

I had bad flashbacks to Yoosung’s first bad ending thanks to this. Thanks, Alma, thanks a bunch...

This also doesn’t happen just once either. At least twice according to memory.

Joy.

Still going on this crazy train to cray cray ville.

Through the power of love and friendship, Alma gets his memories straightened out and he plans one last hurrah for the Bad Apples, to break the (next to) last unbreakable rule: ‘Don’t cry at the graduation ceremony’.

Alma and the gang crashes the ceremony, he gives a speech about how much of a fuck up he was in both of his lives, but he doesn’t want to give up, even if it means being a fuck up, he’s still going to do his damndest to keep living for those he cares about and the power of love and friendship and some other things, I’m sure.

The rest is pretty skippable if you’ve played all of the previous routes, as it’s pretty much identical to everyone else’s end. The Rotten Apple appears, asks everyone if they are willing to live life, even if it’s filled with despair, blah blah, golden apples appear and happy ending for those that want it, yay.

I can’t believe that Alma’s dead girlfriend has to come back from the dead to tell him that he can see other people, that she’s cool with him seeing other people, no need to make himself suffer to keep some old promise that he couldn’t have possibly kept anyway.

Nope, not stopping yet! Here’s the best part.

If peeps have read my review on Higa, you might have noted I’d taken some… issue…. with his good ending. Reincarnation is weird, and I’ve come to accept that.

I take back what I said about Higa’s Good End. I’m sorry I thought your ending was weird and I hope you’ll forgive me with time.

I got my Higa ending in Alma’s route.

He didn’t reincarnate into his brother’s son. He didn’t reincarnate as his great grandnephew like Shikishima. He wasn’t born in the same era as Rinka so he wasn’t around her age when she was brought back to life, like Satoru (and possibly White Mask, as his age is less clear, but he can’t be that much older than Rinka, as he still looks like a high school student).

He came back to life in his own time. Basically, he doesn’t jump off the school’s roof and continued on with his life.

He grows up.

And becomes a doctor.

The doctor that, as fate would have it, saves Rinka’s life from her fatal trucking accident.

The 15 year old high school student Rinka.

I sincerely wish I was making this shit up.

Guess what?

They both retain their memories from NEVAEH Academy.

They’re still in love.

Thank god for the epilogue telling me that they at least waited until she was graduated from high school (hopefully 18 too) before confessing their love and getting engaged on the hospital roof where he works at.

Thank god for waiting, but he has to be at least double her age by this point, good god.

Okay, now the crazy train has finally stopped. Thank god!

I’m done. I’m so done with Alma by this point, you have no fricking idea.

Some Pros and Cons

PRO: He’s calm and cool headed in most situations, good for coming up with plans and intelligent overall. CON: He slits his throat open to prove a point. All with a straight face.

PRO: He’s a good boyfriend that lets you feed him, especially if it’s candy. CON: He spends a year in vomit-inducing grief over his girlfriend dying before he jumps off the roof of his school. Seriously, a counselor? My kingdom for a counselor, good god!

PRO: He wants to be a doctor when he grows up, something he actually does and is awesome. CON: He saves your life when you’re like 15 and then wants to marry you the moment you turn 18. Creep.

Bae Rating: 5/10

Tomato Edgelord is definitely not for everyone, especially when you think that a lot of this could have been solved if someone had gotten this kid some therapy. His route is one of the sadder ones, but completely preventable at the same time. Maybe it was because the previous four (count them, FOUR) all had some sort of support network in their living lives that tried to help them (to varying degrees of success). All Alma had was his sick girlfriend and a shitty father and that was it (I didn’t say much about his dad because he was not mentioned literally at all, just his voice saying how useless his son was. Great parenting, there, bub).

I’ll also reiterate that help is always, always out there, and that if you do need it, please, please PLEASE don’t hesitate to reach out. Don’t put yourself what Alma went through, please get help if you need it.

For my other Bae in Reviews for Bad Apple Wars, here’s White Mask, Higa, Satoru, and Shikishima. For other Bae in Reviews I’ve done, here’s a summary page with links to every Bae in Review I’ve done thus far.

If anyone has any special requests for baes for me to review, here’s the most up-to-date list of games and routes I’ve completed thus far: Butts Touched Master List

Have a good day, lovelies, and remember to touch all the butts.

#bae in review #bad apple wars #bad apple wars spoilers #alma (bad apple wars)#cw: suicide mentions #somebody get this poor kid some counseling for love of god #give the tomato edgelord some counseling

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butchstolemysweetroll · 7 years

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Tagged by @saxrohmerwon ages ago on my brief other blog and just noticed it, thanks bruh ily <3

Rules: Always post the rules, answer the questions given to you, then write 10 questions of your own, and tag some friends!

1. Favorite city (or town/small island/et cetera) in the world and why?

I guess it’d be Avalon. I basically spent every summer of my life there with family and it’s really small (only seven miles long) so you wind up going to the same few ice cream places or antique stores or pizza shops all the time but you never really get bored of it. The whole place has a quiet, old-timey shore town nostalgia to it too that’s super sweet. And like some of my all time favorite memories were staying on the beach until sunset when the lifeguards were gone so we could swim wherever we wanted, or climbing on the outfall pipe and walking to see how far out I was brave enough to go (it got “higher” ((read: the sand started to disappear)) the further out over the water you went), or walking on the beach at night. That was my favorite part, the nighttime. It’s weird how quiet but how alive everything got after dark, and I could hunt for ghost crabs or watch fireworks and the lights from town on the water, and the sand never bothered me as much when it was cool from the dark.

2. Describe your favorite scent/s.

Autumn, if that counts as a smell. But the combined scent of really brisk air and smoky burning leaves and fresh damp ones and hay and I guess plant life generally decaying, but in a sweet way? I also like flower smells obviously, and food smells, but those are boring to talk about. Gasoline, the specific kind of fake (cotton) paper money is printed on. Coffee. I’ve learned to kind of like the smell of cigarettes on clothes, because my boyfriend smokes and I like waking up in the sweater I wore the night before with that smell still on it. People have smells too. Like my mom smells like perfume even when she isn’t wearing any, and it’s nice. And babies smell rad and trigger ALL of my maternal impulses (cannot wait to reproduce, it’s gonna be gr8). And the boy smells really nice... Not even in like a what-deodorant-are-you-wearing kind of way but like skin and sweat and waking up warm in a cold house on Wednesday mornings. And when he comes home from work smelling like fresh cut grass and wet dirt it’s v nice.

3. Who is/was your favorite teacher and why?

My Romantic Lit professor currently, because he teaches exactly what I want to teach and I have a career crush on him. He’s also just super excitable and enthusiastic (let’s talk about that WEIRD weekend in Geneva the Shelleys took guys! Blake was an EDGELORD!) which I love.

I also had a professor at my old school who was super cool and helped me through a lot of shit? I took her personal essay class right as I was sort of in recovery for depression following a terrible, low key emotionally unhealthy (abusive? I still don’t know if I can use that word? Either way, OVER-SHARING YAY) romantic relationship and I explored that and a lot of other stuff pertaining to my childhood and relationships and discovering my queerness in my work for her class, and she was super supportive and involved in helping me experiment with new formats and really use writing as a therapeutic tool and it helped me heal a lot. She was also just a super cool lady (lots of tattoos and wispy blonde hair and a quiet voice, kind of a hipster fairy) who hung out with me at a local music festival in town when I was like fresh out of the hospital and having trouble being around my normal friends. She just always made sure her door was open and went out of her way to make me feel better, and to this day I appreciate that.

4. What is your favorite poem? (Substitute with “song” if you don’t have a favorite poem.)

Oh my GOD, don’t make me choose. I’m obsessed with the Romantics and a few contemporaries have my heart, but I guess I’d have to say “Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening” by Robert Frost. It’s just beautiful and hopeful and simple enough that tiny me could fall in love with it and appreciate it almost in its fullness when I was too young to grasp other works.

5. Weirdest thing you’ve ever heard out-of-context?

Ever? I don’t tend to remember stuff like that for a long time unless I’d like hypothetically overheard a murder or something, but last night some girl was walking back from our student center with her friends and angrily shouted that she wanted to “put her dong through a snare drum” which made me laugh.

6. Best concert experience? (If you have never been to a concert, what do you hope your first concert will be?)

Still gotta say Green Day after just turning 15 years old. I’d never been to a concert before and they were my favorite band at the time. I was so proud to be there because I had 0 dollars to my name and no one would hire me because I was underage, so I had to earn every penny for those tickets doing gross menial work like removing and scrubbing window frames that hadn’t seen soap in maybe a decade (SO MANY SPIDERS), and teeny bopper me thought that was 'punk.’ And at one point Billie Joe Armstrong, who my pathetic little emo self wanted to MARRY told the audience he was proud of everyone who’d worked their ass off to afford to come see them play and I remember turning to my dad and screaming “HE MEANS ME!” It was so wholesome.

7. Favorite holiday (or other special occasion) and why?

Christmas! My house was THE Christmas house growing up. My parents put so much effort into it and it was the cutest thing. Besides the outrageous amount of decorations and the amazing food that takes all week to make and the cute tradition of having my grandparents spend the night to watch us open presents first thing in the morning, the best part of Christmas growing up was definitely the effort my family put into making us kids believe Santa was real for way longer than necessary. One year my uncle got a flashlight and a red solo up and climbed trees in our yard so we’d see “Rudolph’s nose” if we looked out the window. We put out reindeer food every year. My dad would stomp around shaking jingle bells and someone always climbed on the roof making noise, and my mom knew calligraphy, so she’d write us scrolls from Santa on legit parchment and toast it in the oven so it would curl. One year we had an old, old family friend who was a Santa impersonator show up with a legit sleigh and a giant book with all the family member’s names and the years they were naughty and nice in it and stories about why and it was so cute. So whereas most kids found out around like 8 my parents went to extreme lengths so that I believed it until I was like 11 and honestly, I’m really glad they did, because it was a kick ass childhood. I definitely want to be that level of extra when I become a parent.

8. Did you ever play an instrument growing up? If so, how did it go for you?

Guitar, bass, after I learned guitar I could play pretty much anything pluckable with strings, so I had a Romanian lap harp (I was such a cool kid) and I would sometimes play my sister’s viola (often incorrectly and like a guitar, but it was fun to sample when I recorded stuff). I haven’t sang or touched an instrument in like seven years though. I kind of gave up after sad life stuff happened but I want to pick it back up again. I really miss music.

9. If you were given $100 today, what would you do with the money?

Use it toward Christmas presents for loved ones. Since I’m basically not allowed out of the house after I go home for break I have to do Christmas early with the friends and boyfriend.

10. What’s the scariest movie you have ever seen? (Define scary however you like.)

I love scary movies so this is hard, but I guess anything in which children are genuinely evil? Like not even in a supernatural way; it’s not horror but watching We Need To Talk About Kevin fucked me up. I guess being a mom is like so much something that I want, and imagining that happening would def keep me up at night. Especially because I would not know what to do.

Now, for questions:

1. What’s your favorite article of clothing?

Dresses but also plain black leggings. And I have very soft sweatpants that fit just right.

2. Do you still sleep with a stuffed animal?

Nope. I can’t sleep with the live one either lol, Bynx likes to sleep RIGHT where I want to roll over and screams and puts his paws in my mouth when he wants attention.

3. Do you believe in heaven? Hell?

Both, Catholic.

4. Do you listen to podcasts? What are your favorite ones?

Not really, but I’d like to, in theory. It just seems like more effort somehow than watching TV and I am always tired.

5. What was your go-to game during recess?

Four square.

6. Where do you see yourself in the next ten years– not in a job interview kind of way, but actually?

Awwww this is cute to think about. I guess I’d like to be living in like a really woodland but not isolating place, somewhere where my house can be on a lake or by woods or mountains but if I drive ten minutes there’s a cozy-sized town with all I need. Maybe in like Virginia or Vermont. I’m a professor of Gothic Literature at the local college, and my students are engaged and inspiring and call me by my first name. I’m in a pretty and not-too-big house, but it’s warm and smells like our fireplace. I’m married to my lovely guy, and both our jobs are flexible enough that we can have dinner as a family and spend time with our brood of kids. And they pay well enough that we might not be wealthy but we never have to worry. The cat’s still with us and we’ve got a dog, too. We go on camping trips and The Lumberjack teaches the kids how to build fires and tie knots and dad stuff like that. One of the kids at least loves reading and the house is full of books - I’ve got a home office full of bookshelves and a reading nook. We’ve got a porch where we can bundle up and drink wine in the evening after the kids are in bed. We’re not rich but not poor, and our families get along and come to visit. My parents still ask us over for Christmas every year. Wherever I teach, my kids can go there for free.

7. Do you have a favorite visual artist? Who are they?

Oh lord, I don’t know. I mean I like art but I hate the process of liking art. It’s so much more involved than “I like how this piece makes me feel” and I don’t enjoy that. I like individual pieces and I don’t know enough about art to really speak on it.

I guess, though, I like Dali and Khalo as people. They seem unpretentious and fun. Which is surprising because I guess the way their work is talked about you’d think the opposite.

8. Do you really like a food that most people think is disgusting? Or, do you like a popular food to a disgusting degree?

Not really but like I put too much hot sauce / jalapenos on everything and it disgusts people. And I put way too much sugar in coffee, and creamer too.

9. What music did your parents play in the house/car?

My mom is a New Wave junkie like me and my dad had more complicated taste. He was never big into music, so he only really likes a few artists for their voices and some songs for nostalgia. So we listened to a lot of oldies and swing and Judy Garland, but he also loved Blondie and Boston.

10. What would you tell your 15-year-old self?

I’d tell her she’s a lot stronger than she’s going to think she is one day and to tough it out. That people love her and will love her. That when you get older, family is hard, but it’s worth it to work on things. That she’s smarter than she thinks she is and should try harder in school, because when she finally does have faith in herself, it’ll pay off.

Tagging whoever else wants to do this - it’s cold and rainy (here at least) and we could all use a day of warm socks and procrastinating with asks, honestly.

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