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#im sure this is still just me not knowing where to look
lizardwritess · 3 days
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you belong with me
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pairings: bsf!rafe cameron x kook!fem!reader
summary: rafe just cant see he belongs with you. ( about 1.2k words! )
warnings: cussing. sofia being a bit of a bitch. cringy.
trope: bestfriends to lovers. ;)
a/n: i came up with this idea while listening ❝ you belong with me ❞ by taylor swift. please tell me if theres anyone with this similar post already posted so i can give them credit. if you come along any grammar errors, PLEASE TELL ME. english is not my first language so please be kind. enjoy reading! <3
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❝ you’re on the phone with your girlfriend shes upset, shes going on about something that u said. ❞
you sat next to rafe, listening in to him and sofias phonecall. "i didn't fucking call you a bitch sofia, are you trying to break up with me.. gaslight me?" he shouts so sofia on the other side of the phone. "of course you didn’t, why would my best friend lie to me? she saw you and y/n in the country club talking about me." she yells back over the speaker. "maybe she would lie because she's in love with rafe.." you mumble under your breathe. "bye sofia, im sick of this." rafe said, and hung up the phone.
❝ im in my room, its a typical tuesday night. im listening to the kind of music she doesn't like. ❞
you and rafe are sitting in your room. listening to something that rafe had put on. "so.. how is it going with you and sofia?" you ask rafe, who is laying on the edge of your bed. "if im goin' to be honest, i might break up with her. she keeps messin with my head." he tells you while switching the music, something what sofia would hate. this got your attention, since you’ve liked rafe for a long time now. scared to confess to your feelings. "really?" you ask. "yeah, might do it this week or next."
❝ cause, she wears short skirts. i wear t-shirts. she's cheer captain and im on the bleachers. ❞
you were sat on your bed in your oversized t-shirt, you stole from rafe. you have been scrolling for ages on instagram. you saw a post of sofias, her in a short cheer uniform. before you could swipe to the next picture you get a call from rafe, you pick up. "yes, rafe?" you say in a tired voice. "come on my boat tomorrow, me topper and kelce. sofia doesnt want to come, shes still mad at me for some reason. oh and make sure to wear that pink bikini." after that, he hung up.
❝ dreaming 'bout the day you will wake up and find. that what you are looking for has been here the whole time. ❞
so there you were, talking with rafe about the break up with sofia. its been 3 weeks since he broke up with her. and she cant seem to leave you alone. "rafe, i don't know what to do. she won’t leave me alone." you say to him with annoyance in your tone. "ill ask topper or kelce to fake date me or something." you tell him with a groan. rafe jaw clenches. "or just fake date, me." he mutters under his breath, loud enough for you to hear. "what was that?" you say a bit flustered. "nothing.." he tells you. but you don't believe it.
❝ walk in the streets with you and your worn out jeans. i can't help thinking this is how it ought to be. laughing on a park bench, thinking to myself "hey, isn't this easyyy?" ❞
you walked beside rafe, shopping for some new jeans. with all that money you think rafe ever buys jeans? well if you do then you are wrong. he fell with his motorcycle a couple days ago, and hes still wearing the jeans. they're all worn out but he wont buy new ones, so you forced him to shop with you. "what about these?" you show him a pair of khaki shorts from ralph lauren. "yeah, i think they well do." he says to u with a small smile. "alright." you say and walk over too check out. a
fter the shopping trip, you find yourself on a park bench sitting besides rafe, eating ice cream. "uhm y/n, you got some ice cream there." he pointed at your face. "here?" you ask while wiping it with ur thumb. "no, just there. wait." he swipes his thumb over your upper lip, where the ice cream is. and licks it off his thumb. you eyes widen, and a blush creeps up on your cheeks.
❝ and you've got a smile that can light up this whole town, i haven't seen it in a while since she brought you down. you say you're fine, I know you better than that hey, what you doing with a girl like that? ❞
since rafe and sofia broke up, he hasnt been the same. hes been a bit colder, and doesnt go out as much. he only does when you force him. and how you missed that smile of his, and how his dimples come out when he does.
you sit in the living room of tanneyhill, rafe close next to you. knees touching. you lay your head on his shoulder. "are you okay?" you ask rafe with a concerned tone. "yeah, im fine." he says with a cold tone. "what did you see in sofia anyway, you deserve better then her.." this got his attention, were you implying that you were better? only if you knew that rafe has liked you for ages, thats the main reason he broke up with sofia. but he would never tell you that. "like, who?" he asks in a teasing tone. you blush a bit, but still force yourself to look at him. "like me rafe, ive liked you for ages, and i cant keep seeing you with other girls. you couldnt see it, but sofia treated you like shit. but i wasnt going to tell you that." you ramble, embarrassed by yourself. "i have to go." you leap off the couch and sprint to the door, into your car. and you drive away, leaving rafe confused.
❝ if you could see that I'm the one who understands you. been here all along, so why can't you see? you belong with me. ❞
you’ve been ignoring rafe ever since your confession, scared of what he would say when he would see you. it's all working out until one day at the beach, you were sitting on your towel. with your best friend bianca next to you. looking at your group of friends in the water. everything is going perfectly, you havent seen rafe here yet. until you feel a tap on your shoulder, you turn around to see nobody else then the person you didnt want to see. rafe.
you stand up, looking at your feet, a bit embarrassed. he grabs ur chin, forcing you to look at him. when you do, you see him looking down at you with his perfect blue eyes. you look down at his lips for a second, and before you can look up you feel his lips on yours. he pulls away. "have you ever thought just maybe? you belong with me." you tell him. "im not sure what to say, but id like for you to be my girlfriend." he says. "uhm, if you'd want to." he says with laugh. "i'd like that." you say with a lopsided smile.
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chriss-slut · 15 hours
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Puddin'
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~ Dom!Chris X sub!fem!reader ~
Synopsis: Your friends slip up who's your favorite character, but also your fantasy kink.
warning: SMUT!! rough unprotected sex, petnames, degradation kink, daddy kink, cursing, and a lot of stuff that i can't even remeber anymore lol
A/N: this is kinda MY fantasy kink so.. 😀 btw if there's any spelling mistakes, im sorry, i didnt have time to check it :)
I have always been, in some way, a big fan of Harley Quinn (if not obsessed). I discovered her when i was around 12 years old, when Suicide Squad came out. Everything about her inspired me. Whether it was her behavior, intelligence, madness, or eccentricity, deep down, I dreamed of being like her, of being as sexy and alluring.
As I grew older, my passion for her became something I no longer showcased, simply out of fear of being judged by others. I was now 20 years old, and it seemed weird, even boring, to others to see me in the same costume at every dress-up party.
When I met Chris, I never really talked to him about this little obsession I had, mainly out of fear that he would find it strange.
Up until now, everything had been going well between us, and I didn't find it important. He didn't need to know more about this subject.
I was at home with Chris and my two best friends. We had planned to spend the afternoon together so they could meet, especially since our relationship had just become official.
Everything was going well until Julia started talking about what I was trying to keep secret:
"Oh, by the way, are you still coming tomorrow night?" Julia asked me, completely changing the subject while munching on her chips.
"Tomorrow night?" I asked, confused.
"Yeah, to Noah's costume party, like every year, Y/N!" she said in a "duh" tone, rolling her eyes.
"Um... I forgot. Honestly, I don't think so. Chris and I had planned to spend the evening together, so it's going to be difficult for me," I said, trying to find a plausible excuse to avoid further questions.
"What??!" she exclaimed, looking disappointed.
"You can come with him, and that way, you can get to know us a bit more, Chris!" added my other friend Stella, turning to my boyfriend with a big smile, and the others nodded in agreement.
"That would be nice," Chris replied with a shrug.
"See? Come on, you're coming. I don't really plan to give you a choice. We go every year, there's no way you're skipping it this time!" Julia added.
"I don't have a costume anyway, and I'm exhausted right now. It's going to be a no from me, guys, sorry," I said, trying to sound genuinely disappointed.
"You're such a liar. Are you going to make me believe you don't have a costume when you spend all your time dressing up as Harley Quinn at every opportunity?" she said, laughing.
My eye widen and i start blushing a bit. Chris turned to me, and i look at Julia with a face that says "Please, just shut your mouth."
"Oh, because, yes, I suppose you already know, but your girlfriend is completely obsessed with Harley Quinn. It's like she's totally in love with her!" Julia said to Chris, giggling.
"Julia! oh my god!" I said, embarrassed, now trying to hide my face in my hands.
"She's not wrong," Stella added. What a bunch of traitors.
"You never told me about this?" Chris said, confused, while I stood there, dying of embarrassment at the thought that the girls might make things worse.
"What, you mean she never bored you with her Harley Quinn obsession? I'm sure her biggest kink would be sleeping with you dressed as her!" Julia said without any restraint, and this time it was too much for me.
"Julia!! What the fuck is wrong with you!" I said, getting angry.
"Wow, calm down, I was just joking," she said, frowning.
Stella's mouth was wide open, and Chris looked like he didn't know where to put himself.
"You guys should go home. 'm tired, I need to rest," I said to escape the situation.
"What, seriously? You're going to be mad at me for this? Y/N!" I heard Julia shout as I left the room.
I went up to my room and shut the door behind me. My reaction was probably over the top, but I didn't want Chris to know about this. She had no right to humiliate me like that in front of him. I bury my face in my pillow and try to think about something else.
After a few minutes, I heard some knocks on my door.
"Julia, go away! I don't want to talk to you!" I shouted from my bed.
I heard the door open anyway, so I turned around to tell her to leave, but to my surprise, it was Chris.
"I'm not Julia, sorry to break it to you," he said, trying to make me laugh.
"It's not funny," I said, rolling my eyes before sitting up on my bed.
"Can I come in?" he asked.
"You're already inside anyway..." I speak, shrugging
"Are you mad at me or Julia? I don't understand anymore," he said, raising an eyebrow and crossing his arms.
"Sorry," I replied, biting my lip, and he came to sit next to me.
"The girls left and asked me to tell you they really want you to be there tomorrow night," he said, placing his hand on the small of my back, and I sighed.
"Listen, I'd be very happy to go with you. I don't mind. We can always come back together and spend time alone after the party, but I don't want you to fight with your friends because of me," he said, and I turned my head towards him.
"That's not why I fought with them, Chris," I said, looking back at the floor.
"Then what was it about?" he asked.
"It's something stupid. I don't really want to talk about it!" I said, feeling the embarrassment return.
"Come on, tell me. I'm not going to judge you," he said, shaking his head.
"No!" I said, avoiding his gaze.
"Is it because of what she said about your obsession with Harley Quinn?" he asked.
"I'm not obsessed with her!" I said, getting angry.
“And that’s not what I implied. I was just repeating her words!” he responded immediately.
I sighed, realizing it was becoming ridiculous to keep this hidden from him any longer.
“Yes…” I said softly.
“Why did it upset you so much?” he asked.
“Because I was afraid she’d say more, and you’d find it weird!” I sighed.
“Why would I find it weird?” he said, gently rubbing my back.
“I don’t know…” I said, shrugging.
“I don’t find you weird, Y/N. You have every right to be a fan of any fictional character if it makes you happy. I really like Harley Quinn, too. You could have told me; I would have been happy to talk about it with you, baby,” he said, smiling.
My eyes sparkle as i hear him say that and i immediately look at him again. “Really?” I said, looking at him with admiration. I truly have a wonderful boyfriend.
“You know what, why don’t you dress up as Harley Quinn, and I’ll be your Joker? That way, you won’t miss the party, and I get to spend time with you and your friends,” he suggested, standing up.
I smiled at him, leaned to hug him tightly, and nodded.
“And when we get back from the party, I’d be happy to fuck you in your costume to fulfill your kink,” he whispered in my ear, playfully smacking my ass.
“Chris, she made that part up!!” I said, blushing deeply.
“Too bad, I was really down for that part,” he said, laughing.
i laugh too, still embarrassed, and i stand up, going to the bathroom.
_______
it's now the next day, almost 8pm, and I'm with my boyfriend arriving at my place. We just left the mall, where we went to buy a Joker costume to him.
i open my front door and we both run towards my room, since we're kinda late.
"dress up in there while i do it in the bathroom, okay?? i want it to be a surprise for you!" i say sweetly, quickly pecking Chris' lips before heading to the bathroom.
after an hour or so, i knock on the bathroom door so i can have Chris' attention and i shout from inside "Are you done??"
"Uh... I've been done for 20 minutes, Y/N." he says from my bedroom.
I burst out laughing for a bit and then i open the door, making a little pose for Chris, showing my costume.
Chris' jaw drops as soon as i open the door. He stands up and stay froze, staring at me.
i giggle softly and go over him, resting my hands in his chest "What'chu think?" i speak, in a slightly higher-pinched voice, trying to recreate Harley's voice.
Chris' jaw just drops more after hear me, he stays froze for a few more moments until he finally speaks. "wow... you look... wow!"
I giggle "you liked it?"
"Liked it? I just fell in love with you all over again!" he says, now hugging me tightly and lifting me from the ground.
I laugh cute and hug him back, tightly. "I'm so happy you liked it!"
Chris buries is face on the crook of my neck, sucking it softly. "There was no way for me to not like it. you look so hot." he whisper before kissing my neck.
I moan softly and move my hand to caress his hair. "thank you, baby..." i speak before pulling away and look at him. "You talking about me when you look like THAT is crazy!"
He grins at me "thank you, sweetheart! Lets go to that party, then?"
"Yeaaah!!" i yell happily, jumping.
He chuckles at my jump and grabs his stuff. We walk out of my house, going to the party.
After a while, we arrive at Noah's house. A lot of people outside of it, all dress up as various characters and monsters. I lead Chris into the party and after a few seconds, Julia and Stella run up to us.
"HEY, GIIIRL!!" Stella yells, happy to see me, as she hugs me from the side.
"Hey, guys!!" Julia shouts at us both, still a bit scared of me being mad at her.
"Hii!" Chris says at them, waving with a smile.
"Hi, girls! Love your costume!" I speak at Stella. She nods with a smile "Thank you! You look amazing yourself, but I'm used to see it already,"
I laugh softly, not really happy about her comment but i brush it off. "You look good too, Ju!" I speak at Julia.
She smiles at me "Thank you! You too, as always... Can i ask you something?" Julia says, with a soft expression. "Yeah, sure!" i say back.
"Uh... i just wanted to know if you're still mad at me for yesterday... I've been thinking about it all night and, I'm sorry..." She speaks softly.
I smile reassuringly "It's okay... I'm sorry too! I shouldn't have become so mad at you..."
She smiles softy and nods "It's okay, i guess we both screwed up!"
"Yeah, but its alright!" i lean to hug her as she does the same.
Suddenly, Stella speaks, loudly. "So, let's party?!?" We all yell "yess!" and that way, the party begins!
______
After hours, me and Chris are going back to my place, tired from dancing and jumping all night.
I open my front door and Chris holds the door for me to enter, smacking my ass playfully as i pass through him.
"Let's to the room. Now." He speaks in a soft but demanding way, which makes me a bit confused but i obey.
Once we get into my room, Chris closes the door behind him and quickly presses me in it, causing me to gasp softly.
"Remember what i told you yesterday??" Chris speaks, his hands caressing my sides.
"U-uh... y-yeah..?" i speak, slightly nervous, since Chris looks so hot and in a rough mood right now.
He smirks and attacks my lips in a hungry kiss. We both make out for a while. As we're still kissing, he puts his hands under my ass and picks me up from the floor, taking me to bed, where he throws me on.
He crawls on top of me and says, looking down at me "You look so damn hot right now. You have no idea how much i had to control myself to not drag you to a bathroom and fuck you right there." He leans and starts kissing my neck, intensively.
I moan in response and i wrap my arms and legs around him, pulling his body closer to mine.
"Tell me, what do you want me to do with you, Puddin'" Chris whispers, making me freeze for a second. Him calling Joker's nickname to Harley made me see stars... and made me wet.
"i-i want you to fuck me..." i say softly.
"huh? i didn't hear you, baby." he says, now lifting his head to look at me.
"i-i want you to fuck me, Chris. Please!" i whine, already desperate.
Chris smirks at me "Good girl" he says before leaning to kiss me again.
While we kiss, he takes off my Harley Quinn Jacket and toss it to the side. He gives wet kisses down my face to my collarbone, where he stays as he takes off my boots.
"mmh, you're so hot, babygirl~" he mumbles as he kisses me.
i moan softly in response, my hands now trying to take his jacket off, which he helps me with.
After a while kissing, he's now in just his jeans as i still have almost the full costume on.
He grabs my jaw tightly and speaks, firmly "you gonna do justice to your costume and act like a little slut f'me?"
I look up at him with puppy eyes and nod. He smirks and whispers "Good girl~" He moves two of his fingers that was on my jaw and slide it into my mouth, pressing it on my tongue.
"Fuck, you look so good like this... oh, imma fuck you so so good today~" He speaks, in a sensual tone.
I moan against his fingers, swirling my tongue around it.
He then takes his fingers off my mouth with a bop and attacks my lips again, then going down to my neck as his hands go under my shirt, caressing my chest over my bra. He lifts my shirt and move his hands to my back, unbuckling my bra and taking it off, without taking off my Harley Quinn shirt.
He then leans and suck my nipples, which makes me moan "mmh Chris...please, i need you..."
Chris lets out a soft chuckle and grabs my jaw again, harshly, making me look at him "I'm the one in control, got it?" he says in a demanding tone. i just nod, looking up at him.
He nods back and start kissing and sucking my breasts again, now going down my stomach, until he reaches my red and blue tight shorts.
"i gotta take this off, it drove me crazy all night." he speaks, now pulling it down, letting me in my fishnet tights, my thongs and my Harley shirt. He looks down at me and bite his lip. Chris caress my thighs and spreads them, softly passing his hand in my clothed pussy, making me whimper. "Chris, Please..."
"Did you not hear me when i said i was in control??" he speaks in a serious tone "I'll do whatever i want with you, understand?"
I sigh softly and nod. "Good." he speaks before slapping my inner thigh hardly, earning a loud moan from me.
"God, you're so good to spank!" he says, slapping my other inner thigh hardly, i moan loud again.
"Turn around f'me, ma" he speaks to me and i immediately do it. He smirk down, looking at my ass, half covered with my square tights and he spanks my ass, strongly. i cry loud, burying my face in my pillow.
He grabs a fist of my hair and pull my head back, for me to look at him. "Don't wanna mess that make up yet, do ya?" i shake my head, whining from the pain in my scalp. He throws my head on the pillow again, now with my head to the side. He slaps my ass again, and again, and again, making me whine in pain, but also in pleasure.
The last time he slaps my ass, he spanks between my ass cheeks, making me moan loud. He lets out a soft chuckle from my reaction and says "Looks like someone likes to be spanked, isn't that truth?" i whine in response and he slaps the same place again, now gripping my hair again. "answer me. with words." he speaks firmly and demanding. "y-yeah, i do... i-... i l-like it..." i speak, whiny. He lets go of my hair and whispers in my ear "you're so pathetic, aren't you? Look at you, looking like a real whore f'me"
He slaps my ass again and turns me around one more time. He digs his fingers in my square tights, right between my legs, and he stretch it out, ripping it over my pussy. He looks at my sexy thong and he looks at me with a smirk. "is this for me?" I nod softly. He slaps my clothed pussy, making me whine loud, with a smirk. "Be ready, i think you'll need to~" he says to me, before ripping my thong and tossing it to the side.
Seeing him ripping my clothes always make me more turned on, seeing his arms muscles flex gives me butterflies.
He slides his finger through my wet slit and he says "so wet for me. such a little slut for liking me treating you like this." He pushes one finger in my hole, making me moan a bit. He keeps with it in, not moving, and he looks at me. "Look at you... I'd take a photo of you just to show everyone how much of a slut you are... looking so good just for me."
Suddenly, Chris pulls his finger out and slam three fingers into me, making me moan. He starts fingering me roughly, hardly and fast.
"O-oh Chris! fuck!" i moan, leaning my head back from the intense pleasure.
He, then, stops again, making me moan frustrated. "All fours. Now." he speaks demanding and i do it, my ass now almost at his face.
Chris slaps my ass and caress my wet cunt. "so beautiful like this, puddin'... so perfect~"
I whine softly in response and he stands up, unbelting his pants. He grabs his belt and hit the bed hardly with it. "If you do something i didn't tell you to, you'll pay for it. Got it?" i nod frantically.
He pulls down his pants and take them off, tossing it to the pile of clothes on the floor. He grips my hips and pull me to the edge of the bed, so he can fuck me while standing up. He grabs both my ponytails and pull my head back. "You gonne be a good girl and not cum for me until i say it, alright? Don't leave this position and don't scream too loud until i let you, alright?" He speaks in a firm and demanding tone.
"Yeah..." i speak softly. "Yeah, what?" Chris says, pulling even more my hair. "Y-yes, daddy..." i whine. Chris slaps my ass and throw my head forward "Good girl~".
Chris rubs his clother hard dick against my wet pussy, making me moan softly. "You're so wet you're making my boxers soaked. slut!" He pulls his boxers down and slams into me, making me scream loud. He lean over my back and slaps his hand on my mouth, pulling it back harshly. "What didn't you understand about not. screaming.?" I whimper, squeezing my eyes shut, and speak against his mouth "i'm sorry..."
Chris lets out a breathy mockingly laugh and takes his hand off my mouth, my head falling down harshly. "fucking pathetic." Chris mutters, now pulling slowly out of me. i whine at the sensation and then moan loud, trying hard not to scream, when he slams into me again.
Chris moves one hand to under my shirt, squeezing my breast, and the other to my hip, now starting to thrust in and out of my cunt.
I moan as he fucks me, slowly. "Chris, please..."
Chris stops middle-way and says demanding "First off, I'm not giving you want you want. second, you're not calling me that."
I whine softly "S-sorry, daddy..." Chris slaps my ass again and start thrusting into me again, still slowly.
After a while, i give up on moaning and i stay quiet. My head down with my eyes squeezed shut. Chris notices that and start going faster, hitting my g-point every time he pushes into me. i moan and i lean down to rest on my elbows, my back arched and my ass higher.
Chris slaps my ass again and groans lowly. "mmh, baby~ why are you so hot and perfect? looking like a real slut like this, while your pussy clenches around me. fuck!" He starts punding harder, slapping my ass a few more times.
I moan deep, trying to not be loud though. Chris keeps pounding into me until my cunt starts clenching too much around his cock. He stops and speaks "You ain't cummin' now, bitch. You know what happens if you do." and starts fucking me hard again. i start moaning louder, trying my hardest to not cum. I whine "p-puddin'... p-please... i-i can't..."
Chris slaps my ass the hardest he can and says, roughly "No. You're not cummin, Y/N. Or should i call you..." he leans over me, putting his mouth right behing my ear "Harley?".
I can feel the knot in my stomach almost exploding ad he whispers that to me. I can't believe I'm finally realizing this fantasy.
He feels my pussy clenching more around him as he says that and he laughs, smacking my ass again. "oh, you liked it, dont you? you want me to call you Harley? Is that it?"
i nod frantically, barely able to speak at this point. "Words." Chris says roughly, pouding into me roughly.
"o-oh.. y-yeah, d-daddy! p-please, c-call me t-that! o-oh, fuck, its so g-good! p-please!" i whine slightly loud, tears forming in my eyes already.
Chris smirks and start fucking me harder and faster. "fuck, ma! s-such a fucking slut! such a whore f'me!" he says, groaning. I'm so glad i told Chris i liked being degrated! I'm wetter than i was supposed to.
i keep moaning loudly "d-daddy, please! i-i need to cum! p-please lemme cum!" i whine.
Suddenly, Chris pulls out and turn me around, so we're now in missionary.
Chris slams into me again and puts his hand around my neck, hard enough to hurt but not for me to be breathless. "If you gonna cum, I'll see you cum. Gotta see that pretty face with that pretty make up all messed up." He puts his hand on my face and slides it down, messing even more my Harley Quinn makeup.
He, then, slides two fingers into my mouth the deepest he can, fucking my mouth as he fucks my cunt. He starts pounding roughly again, making me scream against him fingers, also gagging a bit.
My eyes starts rolling back with tears, just as my back arching and hips jerking up, feeling myself really close to the edge.
"Look at you. All fucked up like a whore. You really became Harley Quinn, didn't you? That hot bitch. I bet you wanna fuck every guy of the city, don'chu? fuck, puddin'. you're so fucking beautiful." Chris speaks between groans as he pounds into me. i start moaning even louder as i feel myself not being able to hold my orgasm anymore. My cunt clenching around Chris' cock just makes him groan and moan more.
"Cum. Cum f'me, Harley. C'mon, babygirl, cum for daddy~" Chris whispers in my ear. That gives me the final push and i finally cum in his cock. Not a simple orgasm, though. All of this roleplay and dirty talk made me cum hard and squirt all over Chris, which makes him cum inside of me and collapse on top of me.
We both panting hard and shaking. We stay there for a while and then Chris pulls out, laying next to me.
"You did so good f'me, Harl..." He speaks softly, caressing my cheek
"y-you too, puddin'..." i say softly, still panting.
Chris leans and kissed my lips, a long peck. When he pulls away, he looks down at me, admiring me. "Why didn't you tell me this before? This was the best sex I've done in my life..."
i smile softly at him and speak softly, now turning to face him, "I'm sorry for that... if i get another kink, I'll promise to tell ya!"
i hope you liked it! pls comment what you think, I'd appreciate it! :) xoxo
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homestylehughes · 2 days
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i love you.
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pairing(s): jack hughes x fem!reader
summary: in where yn finally tells jack and she loves him.
warning(s): completely fluff! a little suggestive towards the end!
wc: 1.4k
an: hiiii loves!!! writing for jack again, i missed writing for him sooo much. so enjoy this is little cute fluffy piece I wrote, i have nooo idea where this came from, like most of my ideas i pull them out of my ass LOLL. working on other works later today, more will be coming this weekend, to make up for my lack of posting. i honestly missed writing soooo much. okay i'm done, for now lol. hopefully you enjoy, like and reblog if you do. much love as always<3
happy reading <3
Tonight was the night, tonight I am going to tell Jack I love him. Jack and I have been dating for 8 months today, and neither of us have said those 3 special words to each other. I've loved jack for about 5 months now, i mean i how could i not? Jacks been the best boyfriend I can ask for, caring and sweet, loving, all of the above. So why was I so scared to say I love you? 
Saying i love you for the first time in a relationship is a big thing, deep down i know jack loves me, well i hope he does. The fear of him not feeling the same why back scares me, but im not letting the fear of his response hold me back anymore. Tonight is the night.
It just so happens to be our 8 month anniversary, Jack insisting that we go out to dinner at a fancy restaurant. So here I am standing in front of my mirror smoothing and looking at every piece of myself. Making sure my hair falls in the right places, that my dress all fits in the right places. Over analyzing my makeup, constantly fixing the already perfect lipstick I applied 5 times again.
My phone dings, picking it up with shaking hands, seeing Jack texted me saying he’s down stairs waiting for me. Typing a quick response, I grab my bag from my room, and take a deep breath before I head out my door. The walk to the elevator and the ride down the elevator feels like a lifetime. I'm starting to think I just scrape this idea completely and just head right back up. 
The door opens in the lobby, walking out I send a quick smile and wave to the doormen in the lobby. Pushing open the door, I see Jack standing outside his car, his phone in his hands reading something. As soon as he hears my heels click against the sidewalk, his head pulls up imminently, his eyes wide as he flashes me a smile, shoving his phone in his pocket as he begins to walk towards me. 
“Holy shit” is the first thing Jack says as his hands reach my hips, his cool fingers running along the fabric of my dress. “You look beautiful” 
“Thank you, you look very handsome too.” I saw my eyes running over his body, taking in the dress pants and shirt he had on, even swapping his air forces for a dresser type of shoe. 
“Are you ready for dinner, pretty girl?” he asks, making his way to the passenger side of the car, opening the door for me. 
“Yes I am, lead the way” I say , saluting him once he gets into the car. a laugh rips through him as he starts the car, a smile playing on his face as he turns to me. 
“I can't get over how pretty you are” 
“Jack” 
“What i'm just stating the facts' ' he says with a chuckle, i can feel my face heat up with blush as he continues to look at me. 
“You’re so pretty when you blush” 
“Jackkkkk '' I whine playfully out,  turning my body away so he can't see the smile that breaks out across my face. 
“Do you plan on leaving anytime today?” i ask jokingly  my eyes locked on his
“After i do this” he says
I didn't even register what he had said to me before I felt his hand sliding around my jaw pulling my face towards his, capturing my lips into a sweet kiss. Our lips moving in sync my hands moving to cup his jaw pulling myself even closer to him. 
“I've wanted to do that since I saw you tonight,” Jack says as he pulls away from my lips, his hand still cupping my jaw. Our eyes remained locked for a few more moments, tension, and heat filling the car as we stared at each other. 
Jack clears his throat before pulling his hands from my face, my body already missing the contact. 
“I think we should do that again.” i say look at him
“Baby if we do that again we won't make it to dinner, my control is already being tested by how you look in that dress.” he says as he pulls out of the parking spot, his hands holding the wheel tightly as he begins to drive.
I turn to look out of the window as my face begins to heat up with a blush again, smiling as I look at the city lights as we ride past them. My mind slowly reminds me of what I planned on doing tonight, saying I love you to the man that I love. Might be the scariest thing I've ever done before. The devil on my shoulder starts to control my thoughts as I ask myself, why hasn't Jack said I love you first? What's stopping him, then again what's stopping me? 
“Are you okay?” Jack asks, his voice breaking through the silence of the car. “You've been very quiet” he follows 
“I'm okay, sorry” I replied, my hands twirling nervously in my hands.
“You're doing that thing with your hands, somethings up” jack says, i can feel his eyes on me, as he stops at a red light. 
“What's on your mind baby? You know you can talk to me right?” 
“I know i can, i just can't say this to you, i'm scared” i say softly 
“Did someone hurt you, did I do something wrong? Baby look at me” 
Tears threaten to fall from my eyes, as I turn my face towards him, feeling mad at myself for making him feel like he did something, just because I can't express how I feel for him, because I'm scared.��
I no longer want to be scared, I love him. I want him to know that I love him, no matter his response. 
I take a deep breath before saying “can I tell you something?” I ask as he pulls into the restaurant, turning off the car before turning to face me. 
“Yes of course, always” Jack says, giving me a small smile, waiting for my next move.
This is all getting to real, i can feel my hands start shaking, my heart beat increasing by each beat. 
“Okay, i don't really know how to say this, but i'll just say it i guess. I- i love you." I finally said. “And I've loved you for a while now, I never knew how to say it to you. I've been so scared of your response, and i didnt know if you felt the same way. Its okay if you don't feel the same-” 
My rambling is suddenly cut off by the feeling of Jack's lips on mine, his lips dancing with mine, I struggle to keep up with him as he tangles his hands in my hair pulling me harder against his lips. 
Jack pulls away first, our chests rising quickly, he stares back at me with wide eyes. 
“Say that again” he says 
“That I love you?” 
“Yes fuck” he says brining his hand to my cheek again holding it softly, looking at me with love and adoration. “I love you.” he finally says.
“I love you so much,” he says, kissing my lips after every word. 
“Im sorry, i know i should have said it a lot sooner” i say looking at him 
“No, I should have said it first,” Jack replies. “But i'm happy you said it, i truly mean it yn, i love you.” 
My heart melts at his words, Jack loves me, he loves me. I couldn't help but smile brightly at him, Jack returning the same smile to me. Suddenly I feel the car being turned on as Jack pulls out of the restaurant, heading the opposite direction.
“Jack, where are you going? I thought we were going to have dinner "I ask, looking at him as he continues to drive away from the restaurant. 
“We’re going home” he says 
“Why are we going home?” I am still very confused about the sudden change of plans.
“Because I want you in my bed, naked. I want to make love to the girl that I love. Is that okay?” he asks, turning his towards me for a brief moment. 
“more than okay with me” i say 
“I love you.”
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saintobio · 3 hours
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Hi saint! God you have no idea how much I wanted to go home after seeing you updated. You’re basically the only one with notifs on bc I cant, CANT, miss an update from my fave fic of all time (fears for my life bc you said it doesnt get better til chapter 14)
Anyway, this is not really a theory, but im curious as to what transpired between mc and toru the morning after their confrontation. Why did gojo leave? Did they fight? Did mc force him to leave to go to akemi to lessen her feelings of guilt?
Anyway, why do i have a feeling that akemi could, COULD, be 🤰? bc if my memory is correct, I recalled one scene where they woohooed with akemi saying she wanted no protection on? And since i do work on a medical field, it is possible for cramps when implantation happens (mc will have the heart attack of her lifetime istg). Although it could also be bc of her condition bc it wasnt really really explicitly stated in one chapter they woohooed without protection on (my memory is foggy bc i never reread chapters where they woohooed. I feel mc’s pain 🥲🥲) but why do i also have a feeling mc could be pregnant too
👁️👄👁️ bc they did have sachiro after woohooing in the first few chapters of SN (theyre both so fertile skdhjssk). Also, I feel like mc’s heart condition is coming back :((( after chapter 10 where she was pounding her heart to stop the pain, I can only imagine her angina waiting in the corner ;((
There’s only a few remaining chapters left (💔) but theres still so much drama and tension left unresolved (Gem still doesnt know they 👉🏽👌🏽) I thank you from the bottom of my heart that you continuously grace us with your writing. There are only a few fics that really made me feel the pain and surely your writing will always be at the top of a godtier list when it comes to giving heavy angst (i can only hope they have a HEA and have a new kid bc i really wanna see satoru redeem himself as a father 🥲🥲) I will surely miss this series when it ends and I will surely reread this when I am feeling the blues and just want to cry. Your brain and hands work wonders and I hope people here would also learn that waiting for the next update is definitely worth it (please stop pressuring her for new updates :(( saint gives her entire heart writing this. The wait is so so worth it).
And before this ends I would like to ask mc and satoru what are their current thoughts are after their 😏 hot steamy confrontation (I WAS SO HAPPY THEY FCKED TBH) no pressure if they wont answer hehe. Thank you for giving us SN and SY, Saint! I will look forward to future fics from you. Sending you much love and I hope and pray that you get all your heart’s desire 💛💛💛💛
hello loveee!! those are really good questions and thank you so much for ur kind words 🥹 i recognize ur blog bc you’ve been a longtime reader of mine, so happy to still see u here <3 anyway, your theories:
1. the morning after, gojo and yn are already having an emotional exchange (kinda) thats why yn was already crying when akemi caught them!
2. what i can only say is akemi’s pelvic pain situation is there for a specific reason :)
3. their families (gen, momjo, etc) will be back soon, it’s total chaos
4. while doing it? they’re definitely going crazy for each other. next morning is all guilt !!
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f1nalboys · 21 hours
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Could you do a Billy Loomis x Stu Macher x Reader oneshot that's just super kinky I'm just fienin for some billy and stu smut 🙏
MY RETURN TO POLY GHOSTFACEEEEEEEE!!!! anon thank u very much for this request (and dont worry, i got the other one!!!) and i super duper hope u like it!!! it did make me realize i havent written a praise focused fic in FOREVER so sorry if im a little rusty D:
Poly!Ghostface x GN!Reader
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WORD COUNT: 1132
WARNINGS: nsfw, hair pulling, praise, creampie, begging, reader isn't gendered but does get called pretty and beautiful, billy likes to watch <3, established relationship, kinda proofread
Billy and Stu knew how to make you tick in every way. Stu was great at aggravating you just enough to get you to pay attention to him, easily earning your affection back in just a few words. Billy could break you down, build you up, and do it over and over again until it made your head swim. Being with them meant you were on edge, always waiting for the other shoe to drop.
But then there were times, like now, where you didn’t have to worry about anything other than cumming.
“There you go, baby,” Stu’s voice is muffled despite him being right behind you, his lips at your ear, his breath hot against your sweaty skin. He’s moving so slowly, cock pushing deep inside you and dragging out at an agonizing pace. You want to yell at him, tell him to move faster, go harder, something, but the only thing that comes out is a weak whine. He laughs and you feel it vibrate against your back. “Aw, sweet little thing is tryin’ to tell us something, Billy.”
Your eyes open and you do your best to blink away the haze. Billy is in front of you on the bed, his hand slowly stroking his cock as he watches Stu fuck you. Your hands are on Stu’s knees, your own legs bent uncomfortably backwards so you were sitting in his lap. “You gotta use your words, Y/N.” Billy says smoothly, tilting his head, voice smug. “You want him to stop?”
“No!” You say quickly, nails digging into Stu’s skin, your eyes widening enough to earn a laugh from Billy. Your voice is hoarse, raw from your constant babbles of pleasure over the last hour. “More,” you say, wiggling your hips slightly, your head tilting forwards as a sharp gasp rips through you. “Please, need it.” Billy watches with a pleased smirk as you begin to take over for Stu, using your hands on his knees as leverage to push yourself up and down, sinking down onto his cock.
Stu groans at the feeling, his hips flexing slightly. “Fuck, Billy, man… they’re so fuckin’ tight.” His hands rest on your hips, mouth agape as he pants, watching his cock disappear inside you. “So sexy like this, so fucked out, aren’t you, baby?” He asks, his usual laugh cut off by a moan. “Y/N?” You don’t answer. Your eyes are closed, your breaths coming quick, focused solely on the building pleasure in your gut. You barely even register the bed shifting before you feel thick fingers tangle into your hair, tugging your head back up roughly. 
“Hey,” Billy says sharply, fingers still tugging at your hair. Your eyes are open now, head bent back enough to force you to look him in the eyes, and he watches you with a pleased grin. “Stu asked you a question. You better answer unless you want him to stop. And you don’t want that, do you?” He tsks, shaking his head mockingly, his free hand leaving his cock to touch you between your legs. You gasp sharply, tightening around Stu, causing him to dig into your hips to push you down onto his cock even more. Billy’s gaze is unwavering. “Feels like you don’t want that.”
“Way they’re tightening around me, fuck, they better not want me to stop. Not even sure I could pull out.” Stu teases, placing sloppy kisses against your jaw and down your neck to your shoulder. Your head was beginning to throb from where Billy was still gripping your hair but the thought of him letting go, replacing the pain and his fingers with a dull thud, seemed unbearable. “Too tight, you know that, Y/N? Too fuckin’ pretty, too. Fuck, I love you like this, you know that? So sweet.” 
“You’re gettin’ ‘em excited, Stu,” Billy grins, his hand moving in tangent with Stu’s thrusts. “Baby, you better tell Stu you don’t want him to stop or you won’t get to cum.” Billy’s voice is soft and he’s leaning in, pressing his forehead against yours. His cock is aching, untouched, but you know better than to do so without his go ahead. “C’mon, baby, you can do it. Beg Stu not to pull out so you can cum. God, you’re fucking perfect, you know that? I mean, shit, Stu; you ever met someone like ‘em? So perfect?” Stu answers with a grunt and a quick shake of his head, going harder. Billy hisses as his cock twitches. “Fuck, you can touch me after you cum, baby, doesn’t that sound nice?”
“Yes-”
“Always trying to get your hand on my dick,” Billy grins, his hand speeding up, the pleasure building in your stomach tripling in less than a second. “So fuckin’ cute, so dirty, aren’t you? Sexy fuckin’ thing, God, c’mon, start begging so we can reward you.” 
Billy almost sounds desperate, his voice softer than you’ve ever heard it before, and his grip in your hair loosens as he kisses you. Stu’s pace increases, barely pulling you up off his cock before slamming up into you. He’s grunting with the force but he’s holding back and you can tell; he’s waiting for you to beg. 
“Please, fuck, please don’t stop,” you cry out inbetween messy kisses, your face growing hot as your stomach tightens. “F-fuck, I wanna cum, I swear, please let me cum! I need it, I need to touch you,” you say to Billy and he nips at your bottom lip, pleased, “And I need you to cum in me. Please!” You cry, tears burning at your eyes from holding onto the edge of your orgasm. You watch as Billy’s eyes flick back towards Stu, darkening slightly, before he meets your eyes again and nods. 
You cum hard, vision growing blurry at the edges as you let out a strangled cry. Billy and Stu don’t stop their movements, working together to make your orgasm last as long as it could. “H-holy fuck!” Stu grunts, your tight hole finally sending him over the edge. He cums, wrapping his arms around your waist and keeping you seated fully on his cock. “So fuckin’ perfect, there you go… take every drop, baby…” he coos softly, head resting on your shoulder as his hips flex, pumping everything he could into you. You let out a shaky breath, a weak hand pushing at Billy’s. He listens for once, grinning at how out of it you seem, and he dips his head towards you to give you a few kisses. “Happy anniversary, baby,” Billy whispers, brushing his nose along your cheek. You grin, worn out but pleased, your hand moving to rub against Billy’s cock. He sucks in a breath, looking down at his lap, before grinning. “You’re fucking beautiful.”
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friend-crow · 2 days
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Hi crow, hope you're doing well. I have a question for you and/or your mutuals reading this.
Im usually too sick and unwell to cast spells anymore, gathering all the ingredients is the biggest problem because i have to walk and thats really painful with my crps. I feel i have the emotional energy for spellcasting but not the physical energy. I have so many spells I'd like to cast but am just stuck in bed too often to do them. Whats a bedridden friendly way to cast spells? I've heard someone in the community mention "energy batteries" but i didn't really look into it. I feel my most useful spell I've done is a wishing necklace, i enchanted the necklace years ago and occasionally make wishes with it that come true, but i don't think i can rely only on that for spellcasting when im not feeling well. Im starting to ramble so I'll end it here. Thanks for any advice.
Hello! I'm sorry to hear you've been struggling. I'm not sure how applicable my advice will be for your situation, especially without knowing what sort of magical framework you're working with, but I'll give it a shot!
Something that's helpful for me is having premade spell vessels for the main sort of categories of needs I might have, which I can recharge and repurpose as needed. There's still a certain amount of set-up involved, but if you can manage to work on them when you're having a relatively good pain day, then you can (ideally) have them on hand for when you're not feeling up to a whole crafting process.
Example: I enjoy planetary magic as a system because you have 7 "planets" (the classical planets include the sun and moon), and they each have their things they can help you with. Between the 7 of them you can basically get your needs met. So I have a book that I made for Jupiter, which has images of the planet, the symbol, seal, kamea square, Orphic hymn, etc. in it, and inside the back cover is a little envelope where I can put petitions for what I currently need. The idea is that it's supposed to function as a sort of combination talisman and portable shrine, so when I want to do something under Jupiter's rulership, I basically just need pen, paper, a candle, and incense to repurpose it.
Side note: I don't know if you're interested in planetary magic, but I plan on making a series of zines that's basically a zine version of what I described above, one for each planet, that people can print out and assemble for free. Eventually. When I'm not drowning in work and other projects.
Along these lines, I recently posted about the fact that I do my job from bed about 60% of the week. I don't have a laptop, so I've had to get creative with my computing setup so that I can use my PC while reclining in bed. It's taken a few years to get my setup dialed in, but something like getting an overbed table can make a huge difference (I think mine was like $70 and worth every penny). Burning candles in bed is iffy, but maybe you can set up an extra bedside table or something for spell work, and really dial in the most basic components you need and can keep within reach. Simple is good! You can really do a lot with just pen and paper.
I also know people who do a lot of spell work during astral travel, which requires no materials or movement. I don't have a ton of experience in this area as I tend to really enjoy working with physical materials, but that might be an avenue to explore.
Alright, that's my thoughts on the matter for the moment. Opening it up to mutuals!
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staytiny-dreams · 3 days
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dating streamer! beomgyu (c.bg x reader)
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pairing: choi beomgyu x gn! reader
genre: streamer! au, fluff, tiny bit of angst but not really
warnings: some parts focus on covid-19 pandemic if that's a trigger for you, i think that's all but lemme know if you think i missed anything
wc: 3.4k
note: so tired at 3am i accidentally hit the post button when it wasn't ready so if you've already seen this, no you haven't. i'm unsure how it turned out so let me know, i've also never formatted it like this before so any feedback on that lemme know too, and... look forward to the other members versions <33
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squeals leave beomgyu as the tension rises, the anticipation of the jumpscare he knows is coming getting the better of him
the chat speeds by
“i thought you were supposed to be good at horror games”
“what happened to beomgyu has no fear”
“we told you you should play fnaf beomie!”
“took you this long to play fnaf?”
beomgyu whines at all the ‘i told you so’ comments
“come on guyssss im so late to this how am i supposed to know you’d be interest-” he cuts himself off with a guttural scream as freddy finally makes his long awaited appearance
seeing the bamtoris laughing at him in the comments he pouts at them
“chat you distracted me okay, i let my guard down because of you!”
his pc pings with a notification and the text to speech reads out “themarcotoyourpolo says ‘HAH you are such a liar beom you would’ve screamed either way’”
when beomgyu was seventeen, he spent his time like every other teenage boy did
playing video games
but sometimes his best friend would come over and he’d pull himself away for a few hours
only to sit with you and watch streamers play other games
honestly you didn't mind when beomgyu played games when you were over
he was entertaining to watch
really entertaining actually
“hey gyu, don't you think you’d be a good streamer?” you suggested one day jokingly.
you both giggled at the little game of ‘yes and’ that followed, planning out an entire future together where beomgyu was rich and famous, and you lived in a mansion together that was just a haven for video games and your friends, but after your little tangent, the thought was dismissed as quickly as it came.
or so you had thought.
a week later, sitting across from each other at the cheapest your favourite restaurant in town, beomgyu brought it back up again.
“do you really think i’d make a good streamer?”
“why are you actually thinking about it?” you snorted, taking a sip of your water thinking he was joking again, but when beomgyu didn't say anything you tilted your head up at him.
“oh shit are you actually thinking about it?” beomgyu gave a noncommittal shrug and picked at his food, staring down at his plate. he refused to look at you until you knocked the table in front of his plate lightly.
“beomie,” you started as he stared at you with wide eyes, “i could watch you play for hours.” you don't think you could ever forget the way his smile took over his face at your words.
and that led to the next few months spent with you and beomgyu on call for hours a day
playing mostly minecraft together although occasionally he’d branch out to other games
you hit all his milestones together
he still remembers the day you first got a double digit view count
excitement flooded through the both of you as the kind soul who raided you spams your comment section
the same day, beomgyu also hit ten followers, prompting you two to make his discord server
whenever you were too busy to join him on stream beomgyu would whine and complain like his life depended on it
more often than not he’d actually end up cancelling the stream for that day
one day you didn't feel well but you decided to sit on call with beomgyu while he streams so that he wouldn't cancel
beomgyu chattered on as he normally does, yelling about how, “beomgyu never dies,” but he noticed that today you were not reciprocating that same energy.
in fact you had been so quiet that he wasn't even sure you were still alive on the other side.
“(y/n)ie are you alive over there? (y/n)? marco?” he asked and ever so faintly he heard a weak ‘polo’ sound throughout his headphones.
“one moment, chat,” he said to his 20 something viewers before deafening on discord and muting his mic.
he wriggled his phone out from where it hid in his pocket, opened your contact and called you. it dialled almost four times before you picked up.
“i’m so sorry, beomie i fell asleep. i really didn't mean to but i-” he cut you off before you could go on.
“are you okay (y/n)ie?”
“to be honest beom, i don't feel very well i-” cutting you off again, beomgyu announced that he would be coming over to cure you before promptly hanging up and ending stream leaving both you and his chatters confused.
turns out, curing you meant bringing you his mothers soup and watching youtube in bed with you until you fell asleep. your burning forehead left patches of sweat on his chest, but he couldn't find it in him to care.
from then on you had a system in place where you would check if the other was still there by calling out “marco”
and if the other person was okay they’d call back “polo”
sometimes you regretted this system on days beomgyu decided you were too quiet and abused the marco-polo system by continually calling out marco like a broken record
a little while after beomgyu turned eighteen, the pandemic started and so followed lockdown
it was a really hard time for beomgyu
you were supposed to be starting college together that year, along with your close friends from high school soobin and taehyun
but now all classes were online and he wasn't allowed to see any of his friends
going from seeing you everyday to never took a toll on beomgyu that he didn't expect
he just hated knowing you were only a few streets away and he couldn't just walk over to you whenever he felt like it
beomie :>: are you looking at the moon rn and wondering if i’m also looking at the moon rn?
ynnie <3: beom we called for six hours today
beomie :>: i know right, i miss you too :((
ynnie <3: omg fine get back on disc lets watch a movie
but with his ray of sunshine by his side, he eventually found his footing in this apocalypse
a lot of his time was spent on call with you
working on your respective assignments
watching your online lectures on 2x speed
any other free time was spent streaming
since everyone was stuck at home, due to his frequent streaming schedule
and infectious energy
beomgyu’s audience quickly grew
going from 1000 followers when lockdown had started to hitting 3000 followers within a few months
taking your advice, he also became more active on his other social medias
even posting clips of his streams on tiktok
a few of which went viral causing his channel to grow substantially again
he also started a youtube channel for those shorter games
or ideas that required more editing to execute than a stream would allow
one day, while checking his twitter dms his eyes almost fell out of his skull
he dialled you immediately
“(y/n) (y/n) (y/n) (y/n) (y/n) (y/n)!”
you took a deep breath in, prepared to repeat his name back to him in the same tone, but you didn't get the chance.
“do not copy me, we do not have time for that, this is a code blue, (y/n), code blue!”
“what on earth is a code blue?”
“big creator dmed me (y/n), come on, we’ve discussed this!”
“we’ve never discussed a code system in our entire life.”
“what that is such a lie, you just never listen to a word i say!”
“well sorry beomgyu if you talk so much nonsense that it's hard to keep up,”
“nonsense? you take that back!” he screeched, but you could only giggle at him.
“i will literally never do that. come on gyu, what’s the code blue?”
“oh, yeah! j-hope messaged me (y/n). he asked if i wanted to join his friends' discord and play among us with them.” you squealed for him, excitement rushing through you.
“oh my god, oh my god, oh my god! beomgyu, what did you say?” suddenly beomgyu felt sheepish, realising he’d just been sitting there with the message open, too busy bickering with you to have responded.
“oh um… well, nothing yet i called you first…” now this time you screeched.
“you left 20 million youtube subscribers, 1.5 million twitch followers jung ho-seok on seen? beomgyu!” you scolded. beomgyu didn't know whether to be afraid or laugh, but his endearment got the better of him and he burst into giggles at your tone.
“don't laugh at me mister, text him back right now and tell him you’d be honoured to play with them!” and as he began to type out a reply to his senior, all beomgyu could think about was how he couldn't wait to have you in his arms again.
joining such big creators in playing among us put beomgyu in contact with even more big creators and had his channel blowing up
he met many new friends including someone who would become one of his closest friends
huening kai
as covid restrictions were eased and tightened again, beomgyu made sure to see you any time he could
but due to social distancing laws, he wasn't able to tackle you in his affection the way he wished
at the end of 2020 the second wave of covid set in
your anxious mother decided that you were not allowed to leave the house until the pandemic was over
beomgyu struggled with this news
his weekly outings walking six feet away from you - but still with you - were helping him hold on to his ray of sunshine
but with your assurance that you'd spend even more time on call with him and watch all his streams, he was able to keep his mood-maker demeanour in front of his fans
“so what are your plans for valentine’s day, (y/n)?” beomgyu asked, already knowing your answer.
with february 14th approaching, beomgyu was kicking himself for not having said anything sooner because your mother still wasn't letting you out of the house and beomgyu wanted to say what he had to say in person
“what do you mean gyu? you know i’ll still be stuck at home.”
“hm… well, maybe we could do a minecraft date, like a valentine's day special.” he suggested tentatively.
“like for your stream?” you asked and he shrugged.
“we don't have to stream.”
“but beom, aren't our friends all having dinner at soobin’s that day? don't you want to join them?” you reminded him and he simply shrugged again.
“don’t want to leave you all alone on valentines day (y/n)ie.” your face felt hot. you loved your mother to pieces, but sometimes her self imposed covid restrictions really got on your nerves.
and then march came, and for the first time in twelve years you feared you wouldn't be able to spend beomgyu’s birthday with him
“mum please, i’ll do anything,” you begged, “legally four people are allowed at an indoor private gathering.”
“and what if someone there has covid (y/n)? you have asthma it could really affect you!”
“it’s only going to be gyu, soobin and taehyun. you know all of them, you trust them! plus we’re all going to test before we go!”
“and what about transport, (y/n), what if you catch it on the bus?”
“i’ll take a taxi.”
“and what if the taxi driver has it? or what if you get in the car with a bad driver or a kidnapper?”
“mum! where is all this coming from? please. it’s beomgyu’s birthday, i can't miss beomgyu’s birthday. i swear i will never ask to go out again. just please let me go see him tomorrow.” tears welled up in your eyes. you hated fighting with your mother, but you couldn't let beomgyu down like that.
but the fight was all worth it when you knocked on soobin’s door the next night and beomgyu opened it.
he pulled you inside and slammed the door shut before squeezing you tight to his chest.
“you're here?” he asked, voice muffled as it was buried in your shoulder.
“happy birthday beom,” you smiled, arms tight around his stomach.
he pulled away from your hug and before you could joke about how your mother would never let you see the light of day again, beomgyu pulled down your mask and pressed his lips to yours.
two seconds passed where you stood still, wide eyed in shock before you registered what was happening and jumped into action.
one of his hands still held your mask, and the other came down to your cheek which you’re sure must’ve been burning him from how hot your face felt. you followed his lead, grabbing his shoulder with one hand and pushing your other through the hair at the bottom of his neck.
too soon, beomgyu pulled away, resting his forehead against yours.
“i’m sorry (y/n). i wanted to wait, until after lockdown, i wanted to talk to you first but i saw you and i just-”
“i love you beomgyu.” you cut off his rambling and he let out a flustered laugh.
“i love you too (y/n), i love you so much.”
due to covid still ongoing and your mother’s strict rules, you and beomgyu decided to take things slow after that night
there were no more meetings in person as you kept your promise to your mother
nothing much in your relationship with beomgyu changed due to your agreement to take things slow
he flirted a little here and there but there were no new pet names or anything of the sort
beomgyu continued to focus his energy on streaming and you continued to focus on your studies
beomgyu’s streams always providing the perfect background noise
but don't tell him that you don't devote a thousand percent of your attention to him at all times
luckily as 2022 approached, your mother began to let beomgyu visit your home provided he wore a mask in common places and if he had any symptoms he did not come over
and in april 2022 most legal restrictions were lifted
with your second booster vaccination, your mother lifted your house arrest
it had been over a year since you confessed your feelings to each other and your 20th birthday approached
you both had a big discussion about giving your relationship a real try
beomgyu now had almost half a million followers on twitch
after grinding for two years, he now had a rather large fan base
you expressed that you were a bit worried about having your relationship public to them
beomgyu didn't quite understand your concern as you had been participating in his streams and been a prevalent figure on his social media since the beginning
however, respecting your wishes, you both worked to keep the romantic nature of your relationship between yourselves and your close friends.
while beomgyu seemed to have found his schtick after 3 years of streaming
playing horror games on stream and co-op games with you for his youtube channel
and the occasional vlog
the friends he had made playing among us, huening kai, ho-seok and jungkook had begged him to join a minecraft server and stream with them
so with your encouragement
and his conditions that his partner and best friends also join the server
beomgyu joined the bighit smp started by kim namjoon
it was only a few months after you officially started dating
just before his 21st birthday and both of your fourth and final years in college
when beomgyu came to you with his proposition
“move in together?”
“is it too soon? i know we've only technically been dating a few months, but-” you cut beomgyu off with a hand on his mouth.
he stared at you wide eyed for a split second before his expression changed. luckily, you recognised the suspicious sparkle in his eye and removed your hand from his face before he could lick it, leaving him pouting at you.
“don’t look at me like that,” you giggled but his pout only deepened and he reached over to grab the hand that was previously on his face.
“so? what do you think? you wanna live with me?”
“hmm… i think…”
“(y/n)…” he whined, dragging out your name.
“i think we’ll need to find a place with an extra bedroom, so you can stream in there and not in our room.”
living with a horror streamer
most days of the week it's fun
a substantial income
your boyfriend’s always home
your boyfriend is practically fearless… in theory
okay maybe he’s only fearless when it’s fictional media
even a little bit of clout, not that it matters to you
as you always have, you tend to join beomgyu and your other friends when they play minecraft in the bighit smp
as well as being in all of beomgyu’s vlogs
since you moved in together, you decided it was best to come clean to bamtoris (his fans) about your relationship
they were very supportive
due to your presence in his channel from the beginning, there were some long time shippers who were more than pleased to hear this news
and maybe a little cocky, plastering ‘i told you’ so posts all over their socials
yes, the beomy/n truthers were very pleased
of course there were those who were convinced he was dating other streamers
or those who shipped him with his other friends, soobin and taehyun
and just general psychos who simply hated you because he wasn't dating them
nevertheless you both saw the relationship reveal as a success
so sometimes you go and sit with beomgyu while he streams, just as you used to sit on call with him
but this particular wednesday night was a tough one
you’d been up late the night before working on your final project for college
then worked from 7 to 5 even though you were originally rostered for only 7 to 12
your head was pounding
and tonight, despite the soundproofing you had installed on the walls of the office
his shouts still reached your tired ears and made your head ache
you tossed and turned for a while, not wanting to ask beomgyu to quiet down as he was clearly having fun
but, after an hour of not being able to sleep you decided you were being stupid
beomgyu would never be upset with you for not feeling well
so you rolled out of bed, padded over to his door and knocked lightly, then cracked the door open
the light from the hall spilled into the room and caused beomgyu to look over at you with a smile
his hair was fluffy and his face was lit up by his screen and his purple leds and he just looked so soft
and before you could say anything, your face crumpled
and a few tears slipped down your cheeks
immediately muting his mic, beomgyu threw his headphones off and ran over to you at the door.
“baby, what’s wrong?” he asked, pulling you into his arms and you laughed at yourself.
“sorry, this is so stupid, i dont even know why im crying.” you mumble into his chest.
that night beomgyu ended his stream early and laid in bed with his arms wrapped tightly around you, whispering how much he loves you
and how whenever you wanted him to be quiet or even end stream he’d do it in a heartbeat
but, if you're not sick, busy or streaming with beomgyu, you're still watching his streams
and sending silly comments
you are simultaneously his favourite and least favourite chatter
your comments always make him laugh but are often at his expense
“themarcotoyourpolo says ‘poor baby, so scared of a big teddy bear’”
“you know what (y/n), get your ass in here, we'll put the headphones on you and see how confident you are then!”
but knowing you're in his chat has always given him comfort
and made him a smidge happier to be there
if beomgyu ever had zero viewers it'd be because you died and he knew that
even then if you ever wanted him to turn his computer off and hang out with you, he’d come running
at the end of the day, whether beomgyu’s screaming at his computer screen or peacefully cooking dinner with you, he is the love of your life and you wouldnt change a thing
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xo-zozo · 3 days
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zoey.....
im afraid to tell you that your headcannons give me life 😌😌
can i request some avery jameson hc's where they're on a date and its just fluff? hehe
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ty sm ems 🤭 ofc i can do this!!
| tags: @urbanflorals @reminiscentreader @nqds @annamatix @x-liv25-jamieswife @sophiesonlinediary @lyrakanefanatic @thatrandomlemononyourcounter1 @fortunatelyjollybeliever @123letsgobestie @off-to-the-r4ces / @zoyaaaabear @clarissawealsey-10
so we're just gonna pretend that this date is a fancy dinner date because those are the best kinds ofc
whenever she gets ready for their dates, jameson comes into her room and sits down and watches her do her makeup
also because he takes like two minutes to get ready and still looks good and he's always bored
sometimes she leans down and gives him a little kiss while shes getting ready and secretly gets all giddy
he's a gentleman so when they get in the car to go on their date he opens the door for her
either he takes her to a place that he knows that she likes or he makes sure that he's taking her to somewhere interesting and new
if they're at a place that she likes he always has her order memorized and orders for her
he holds her hand across the table almost the whole time
he compliments her the whole time and this encourages her to compliant him back
while they're leaving they get recognized by people so they have to run to the car
and because she's presumably in heels she takes them off and she holds them for her
from this point on it's just gonna be random date headcannons
when they're on vacation they go on dates every night and it's always some really unique thing like walks on the beach or going shopping and stuff like that
he gives her hand kisses and gives him forehead kisses
he always takes photos of her throughout the night and they always have a little photo shoot that she can post her pictures
i think that she would also take photos of him for her little photo dumps
sometimes he helps pick out her outfits and then matches with her so they're super cute for the insta photos
he gets her gifts or flowers every date no matter how big the date is (jewelry!!)
sometimes their dates just consist of laying in bed and watching friends together ( i think we've just decided that this is their show)
they try and go on double dates to the bowling alley and karaoke with max and xander but it always ends up super chaotic
so they have to bring nash and libby a lot of the time for supervision
when they were in school jameson would get her to sneak out of school for a rooftop date at least twice a month
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zsuo · 3 days
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headcanon backstory for driver
thank you to @gcslingss for reviewing this for me!
WARNING: i’m going through some heavy topics like abuse and violence.
- he most likely grew up with a lot of violence in his life, i’ve seen people on reddit saying he doesn’t hesitate when it comes to being violent to someone. (which i agree on)
- he’s the only child in his family which can explain his independence and self sufficiency
- he might have come from a rough childhood, neglected or abuse from his parents (also in a neighborhood where it was tough)
- i think the reason why he takes good care of benicio is because he knows what’s it like to grow up without a parent figure with neglect or abuse he doesn’t want benicio to live through the same thing he has (he wants to be a good person)
- from that, since he didn’t have his parents to take care of him, i think he went on to be in the wrong groups of people (mafia or gangs)
- later on, he might have been hired as a hitman before he moved to LA (he seems to have a lot of experience on how to kill in the hotel scene though i’m not sure who could’ve trained him? maybe he was involved in gangs or something)
- shannon said he moved to LA six to eight years ago, i haven’t done the math. i don’t know how old benicio is but we do know irene gave birth to him when she was 18. i think driver maybe mid 20s close to 30. if he’s 25 in that movie, he would’ve been 19 when he met shannon.
- he got tired of killing people, so i think that’s why left and went to LA (hitchhiked his way)
- i like to think he might have walked around the area before spotting shannon’s shop looking for a specific type of older models because he himself drives one and i think he wanted to find a place that has them
- driver loves cars (obv) and probably got that from watching tv or someone who he used to look up to drove a specific type of older model
- also the fact, his jacket and gloves could be from movies or shows he’s watched so when he finally got the money from working with shannon, he brought them
- i don’t think he had any type of romantic relationship with anyone (but i could be wrong) maybe he had some fling
- i also like to headcanon that his name is leo, he seems to be a leo guy but im open to any more names
anyways, this is kind of a rough draft. i’ll still be updating more if i can. you can use these for your fics or whatever. just give me credit if you use them for inspo!
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zeawesomebirdie · 3 months
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Shout out to my dad for listening to my rant about how hard it is to find non-romance gay Old West novels
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stromblessed · 6 months
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Mizu's spectacles, and the levels of her disguise
In drafting some more Blue Eye Samurai meta posts, I find myself writing out the comparisons between what Mizu can and cannot hide about herself, and how that affects how she moves through the world.
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Like, I get the jokes about Mizu's glasses, if only color contacts had existed back then, etc. etc., and I think (hope) that most viewers don't take the glasses jokes seriously, as in "I don't care about the suspension of disbelief because BES is a cartoon." But I wanted to write these thoughts out anyway without burying them in a text post about something else.
I think the points I'm going to lay out here are viewed very differently by different people, so please feel free to add to this post, reply, or put your thoughts in the tags!
Not only do Mizu's glasses not actually help her that much, there's surely more to Mizu's mixed race appearance than just the color of her eyes.
In my view, this was pointed out in episode 1:
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I'm willing to bet most of us were expecting young Taigen to say "blue eyes," not "ROUND eyes."
Obviously this is still about Mizu's eyes, but not even spectacles can hide their shape.
I don't think the show is obligated to point out everything about Mizu's face that isn't quite as Japanese as the people around her expect. Though the creators have said that they specifically designed Mizu - and her clothes - to read both as "white" and as "Japanese," as well as both male and female. I think there's more about Mizu's features that read as "white" than just her eyes.
This is where my own headcanons start entering the picture, but it's my impression that people can just tell that Mizu looks different, whether or not they can put a finger on exactly how.
There's the little girl who looks at Mizu and then hides on the way into Kyoto:
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When there's more to your face you'd like to cover up than just your eyes, big hats are a big help!
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By the way, most of these examples have to come from the first half of the season, since by the second half, either Mizu is too preoccupied with fighting henchmen, or everyone Mizu is facing knows who she is already, and she therefore has no reason to hide her mixed race identity.
It's worth mentioning that the mere fact that Mizu has to hide multiple aspects of her identity - her mixed race and her sex - results in her having to choose clothes that really, really cover her up, which doesn't win her any favors either:
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(Zatoichi reference, anyone?)
If it were as easy as, for example, tying her glasses to her head and wa-lah, nobody would ever know she was half-white - then (1) Mizu would've just done that long ago, and (2) Mizu wouldn't be so on guard and on tenterhooks 100% of the time the way she's depicted in the show, even when her glasses are on.
Her spectacles sure don't help her in the brothel, which is full of observant women who are trying to seduce her, meaning they get good long looks at her:
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Mizu never takes her glasses off, but they still send a woman to her who has light eyes, thinking that must be what will interest a blue-eyed man:
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No wonder Mizu gets mad after this, lol
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So Mizu never takes her spectacles off in the brothel, it's dimly lit inside, and the women can still tell that she has blue eyes. I'm getting the sense that Mizu putting on her spectacles isn't a guarantee that people suddenly can't tell that she looks different.
And yet no one spots that she's female.
Mizu can hide her breasts, can wear her hair in the right style, can hide what's between her legs, can walk and talk and behave like a man - and she's been doing it for almost her entire life, to the point that not only is she very good at it, but the threat of being found out as female is deadly, but isn't presented in the show as omnipresent.
Let me explain.
She threatens Ringo for nearly saying the word "girl" out loud, because while she's constantly ostracized for being mixed race, being a woman traveling without a chaperone, carrying a sword, and disguised as a man will get her killed or flogged or arrested or some combination of these things.
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But in addition, it's been drilled into her since she was a child that if she is discovered as female, the combination of her being mixed race and female will identify her as someone extremely specific, someone known to some bad people, and she will be killed:
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I think of it as Mizu thinking to herself, "Being found out as mixed race means I'm treated badly. Being found out as mixed race and a woman means I'm dead."
Mizu's hair is cut as a child. But she isn't made to wear a big hat, or cover her eyes somehow, or anything like that. Because hiding her sex is a more successful endeavor than hiding her race.
Ringo finds out she's female by accident, but once Mizu accepts the fact that he won't rat her out, she relaxes pretty early on in the season. Because the threat of being found out as female is mitigated pretty much 99.9%, since Mizu has gotten so good at being a man. And also, because most of the time, people see what they want to see. Even if Mizu's face makes her stand out as "not 100% Japanese," no one in the world of BES looks at Mizu's clothes, her bearing, her sword, hears her voice, and will ever in a million years conclude that she is a woman, because expectations around gender roles in the Edo period were so rigid and so widely enforced.
One detail that proved this to me is after the Four Fangs fight:
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Ringo takes off Mizu's clothes so he can stitch her up, then leaves her clothes off even after he's done. He doesn't even throw her cloak over her as a blanket or anything. There's a little a straw (pallet?) as a divider there on the left, but anyone could just peek around it and see Mizu and her chest bindings. (I think it's mostly there as a windbreaker.)
And Taigen is right there, but he doesn't give a shit:
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Opinions probably vary hugely on this, but my impression is that because the show doesn't make any kind of deal about Taigen being in the room with Mizu here, my guess is that Mizu isn't in any danger of Taigen thinking she's female. Even when I watched the show for the first time, I assumed that Taigen had seen Mizu out of her clothes here, and that he thought nothing of it.
Eat your heart out, Li Shang (Mulan 1998). I actually do think that this scene is a direct and purposeful side-eye to that movie, lol
There's obviously some nuance to how "severe" being mixed race is compared to how "severe" being a woman is for Mizu:
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After all, Swordfather can't bear to listen to Mizu confess to being a woman.
So a Japanese man can go wherever he wants, whenever he wants in BES. A Japanese woman has limited options: marriage, religion, or a brothel. A mixed-race man is an eyesore in this story. A mixed-race woman is a death sentence.
May as well eliminate the female aspect, and do what you can about the mixed-race aspect. Because that's just realistic.
Meaning Mizu can avoid the strictures Edo society places on women. But she can't avoid the repercussions that come with being mixed race. And I truly don't think that it's just because "there's no brown contacts yet."
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"I think this is the most inhuman; and human, that I've ever felt.." MUCH CAN HAPPEN IN A YEAR. IN FIVE YEARS. A DECADE. imagine how much can happen in a century. just ONE (1). How will you grow? what phases do you find? even in 5 years, you will find patterns.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi suckening#jrwi suckening spoilers#jrwi the suckening#arthur bennett#HEY SO THE REALLY FUNNY THING THAT THE CHARACTER DID THAT SEEMED RLY SILLY N GOOFY IN THE MOMENT?#LIKE THE WHIPLASH BETWEEN SERIOUS N SILLY ALMOST PISSED YOU OFF? WHAT IF I FOUND A WAY TO MAKE YOU SAD ABOUT IT#this was meant to be a scribble that would be a bigger part of a bigger page.might leave it on that page.#but still. bc o that i nearly posted it onto my wacky side blog.BUT NAYY I SPENT TOO MUCH TIME N ENERGY N YOU GOTTA SEE IT#ARTHUR BENNETT DRIVES ME CRAZY. I FEEL LIKE ITS ODD FOR HIM TO BE SO TECHNOLOGICALLY OUT OF TOUCH#WHERE HAS HE BEEN. HAS HE BEEN IN WAR? IS THAT WHERE MAGNUS CAME FROM? WHERE WAS HE WHEN HE WAS WITH EDWARDS CREW?#ARTHURRR I HAVE QUESTIONS ARTTHUUURR!! HEY CAN I ALSO ASK; WHAT THE FUCK HAVE YOU BECOME#DO YOU THINK HE HAD ANY IDEA HE WOULD VEER CLOSER AND CLOSER TO THE MONSTER HE DESPISES. ALL BC HE DESERVES IT. OR WATEVER#HE FASCINATES ME SO MUCH. TO LOOK AT THE STONE COLD STOIC FOOL FROM THE START OF THE SHOW#AND TO FIND OUT THAT HE USED TO BE A BAD BOY.. A DELINQUENT... A LIL PRANKSTER.... MY GODDD THATS ADORABLE#I WOULD LOVE TO KNOW MORE.... BUT I DOUBT THE LAST EPISODE IS GONNA ANSWER THOSE QUESTIONS..i love arthur bennett so much....#AS FOR THE ART!! i mostly used the fire alpaca watercolor brush. tbh im not a brush guy. anti aliased default pen tends to be my main game#but LATELY IM SQQQUIRMIN OUT OF AN ARTBLOCK so expirimenting like this is helping#DONT LOOK TOO HARD AT IT!! im still proud tho. colors are fun :3 im also very proud of the backgrounds#I LOVE THE CARTOON THING where the background looks all fancy n painted but the characters are solid colors#what else can i ramble abt. OH YEAH. i looked up the bikes to make sure they were time accurate tehehehe. 1913 to 2012.#almost a century apart!! isnt that neat? ALSO FUUUCK CAN I JUST MAKE A QUICK CONFESSION. DOWN HERE IN MY TAGS.#only the strongest can read my tags anwyay. SO I REALIZED WHY I LOVE ARTHUR SO MUCH. TIME IS A FLAT CIRCLE#while arthur is a Stoic and Cool vampire w a knack for being playful/silly; who alsos been alive fora century thus witnessing HORRORs#THERE HAPPENS TO BE A ROBOT FROM A BAND W A TITANIUM ALLOY SPINAL COLLUMN#WHOS A Stoic and Cool ROBOT w a knack for being playful/silly; who alsos been alive fora century thus witnessing HORRORS#the fuckkkiiinnngggnn The Spine from steam powered giraffe. WHATEVER. i cant escape from my heart. i guess.#i think The Spine and Arthur could be friends. Arthur saw the band perform back when they were the Steam Man Band#EDIT: WOOPS I DIDNT REALIZE THIS WOULD END UP IN THE SPG TAG. HI GUYS DIDNT KNOW U WERE STILL ALIVE SORREE 4 THE CROSS CONTAMINATION
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moeblob · 3 months
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Karen: LMAO every guy I meet reminds me of my big brothers that's so funny except if Paul is already my brother and you're also a brother that's a bit awkward, huh Hot bartender: THATS MOVING REALLY FAST AND I LIKE YOU AS A PERSON BUT - Karen: having my brothers date would be SO WEIRD Hot bartender: Well on the bright side I literally cannot speak more than five words to him so we aren't dating because he's so cute
(Everyone else: that is somehow the most depressing bright side we never want to hear)
#my characters#oops i fell in love#I just think its really funny how i view so many of the cast as either the only child or#somehow still the only child but with twin cousins that he grew up with somewhat like siblings but is older than them#and then THESE TWO LOSERS (beloveds) are definitely younger siblings#there is no way Karen developed her personality without the help of older brothers#there is also a very funny and agonizing thing where she is super single cause she can't view a guy as more than a brother#she meets an asshole and is like wow just getting huge brother vibes from him wtf#and meets the nicest man possible and is like HOW IS HE ALSO LIKE A BROTHER I WILL NEVER LOVE ROMANTICALLY#and she has all of the guy friends and its very clear if they were interested she has long since friendzoned them#but its fine because they all are also convinced that shes exactly what it would be like to have a brother#so its fine its all good no one really agonizes over not romancing her and she just as a found family in everyone#hi my name is salmon and you may recall my feheroes experience where i want to give a certain male all of the siblings#the sibling adopter extraordinaire ? yeah thats basically karen now that i think about it#you know one time at work at my first job there was a girl who had a crush on a guy and we all worked the same shift a lot#and one day she was whining because he was so friendly to me and he looks at the girl straight faced and says#ITS BROS BEFORE HOES aint that right and im like uh huh sure thats exactly right#and later i told him i really wanted to know where she went wrong because i had a crush on him in school until he opened his mouth#and hes like yeah sucks to wanna date me you made the right choice#and i just ..... will never forget that weird guy#he saw me in a hoodie once and goes NO WAY I HAVE THE SAME ONE and then makes sure he brings it in next time we work together to prove it#he was like an annoying younger brother to me and i thought it was very funny that apparently i too am a sibling to him#i might be adopted and i might be biased but i think everyone could use an adopted sibling that they dont live with#thats a special bond ok im just sayin#also sorry its so late tonight i had some uhhhhhh problems haha
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figofswords · 4 months
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anybody remember the stephanie brown essay I was working on under a research grant fully last summer? yeah it’s not done yet it super needs to be done and I’ve been avoiding working on it for weeks. someone tell me to just do it already
#the problem is. actually there are several problems#1) I’ve been out of the Batman/dc comics phase for almost a year so I don’t care that much about the topic#2) I am fifteen pages in and have not touched it in months so I’ve completely lost my train of thought#3) I can’t just reread it because I hate first five pages or so and I know I need to change it but I was trying to finish before editing#so now my only solution is I need to open up a new doc and completely restructure the whole thing by splicing together the existing writing#so that I can figure out where the hell im going with this and make sure things fit together better#unfortunately that sounds fucking exhausting#but I told my mentor I would have an update for him by the end of the week and. well. it’s the end of the week#I have to present it in April. I have to write and submit an abstract in March#the school gave me $1500 for this stupid essay and if I don’t have anything to show for myself.#well. I don’t know they can’t take the money BACK but it’s not a good look#and also I would feel bad#I did the research!!! i interviewed comic writers even!!! I just haven’t finished WRITING IT DOWN#and I KNOOOOWW once I get started it’ll be fine once I’m going I’m going#but STARTING is hard because I feel like I have to finish it in one go which makes it so huge and daunting#I’m like. slamming my head into a wall. just write a couple sentences Jess something is better than nothing#just start it you don’t have to finish just START just MAKE the new DOC#I know!!!!! that is what my therapist would say!!!! Jess you’re trying to oneshot it bc of your dumb adhd brain!!!!#stop looking at it like that and making it scarier!!!#but even tho I know that logically I’m still like oh I should put away the dishes o should make bread#I should work on my six different art pieces I should do laundry i should play with the puppy I should go for a walk I sh
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evilsartcorner · 6 months
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quietwingsinthesky · 2 months
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youtube stop recommending me that five hour long “fall of doctor who” video challenge. there is not a video i could be less interested in watching.
#the youtube clickbait hyperbole is not doing it any favors. im sure there’s nuance in the video. maybe.#god there must be its five hours long.#but i do not think i am interested in a video that wants to be about ‘the fall’ of doctor who when. far as i can tell. seems more like#occasionally it stumbles. and that’s about it.#AND thirteen being the doctor that’s on the thumbnail is also not helping. im sure im making assumptions there too and its just that she was#the current doctor at the time but. this is youtube. you have a negative video. and you put a woman on there. i am primed to believe you are#about to say something insanely sexist lmao.#anyway. whatever.#its a me thing. i dont like watching negative epic teardowns™️ of stuff im not finished with myself. and doubly so when im unfamiliar with#the creator and don’t know if they’ll just be stomping and yelling at something for hours with no purpose or if they’ve got. anything#to actually offer. idk. it’s the shovelware lover in me i think. im not interested in someone’s negative opinion about a thing unless i know#they’re the kind of person who can respect that people still had to put months or years of work into it. maybe that work did not have a#good outcome but someone had to do it. the effort is worth being documented and looked at and not. i don’t know. yelled at like you’re the#nostalgia critic you know? im rambling on to much here#this is why the only good youtube video is folding idea’s video on the american tail video game. he gets it. its about how bad art is still#worth existing and being examined. and doctor who is far from being bad. so.#………..where was i going with this. its 4 am.
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