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theparanormalperiodical · 5 years

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Scary Halloween Costumes: Your Guide To Realistic and Really Spooky Costumes (On A Budget)

“In the real world, Halloween is when kids dress up in costumes and beg for candy.

In Girl World, Halloween is the one day a year when a girl can dress up like a total slut and no other girls can say anything else about it”

Set your stop watches people - we’ve got 11 days to prepare for the most wonderful time of the year: Halloween.

And despite the cultural traditions echoing across the world, there is one phenomenon that dominates the rest.

Halloween costumes.

It’s the personalised touch Christmas loses out on, and it's the one day of the year we can awaken our inner child.

And no, I don’t mean the therapeutic kind where you get in touch with your real, raw self. I mean the inner child that wants to pull on a Pennywise cosplay and eat an unrealistic amount of processed crap.

Working out your halloween costume requires thought and consideration. And then giving up on creating a latex prosthetic and slapping on a pair of cat ears.

But at the Paranormal Periodical, we like to do things a bit different.

If you like things spooky and you’re a bit skint, pull up a chair - welcome to your complete guide to realistic halloween costume ideas!

Every year we see the classic costumes: a witch in a black hat; a vampire sporting a single drop of fake blood on the lip; and a zombie with a scrape of blood down one arm.

I’ve decided to shake shit up.

I’ve taken the most common costumes, and gone back to the roots of the creatures. Yep, I’m rewriting halloween, and putting scary back on the menu!

So, if you’re considering being a witch, vampire, zombie, or mermaid, here is your guide to the realistic costumes.

Let’s get spooky!

The Witch

It’s a classic.

It’s the go-to option for women, merely requiring a pointy hat you can grab from Claire’s, and the clothes from your goth phase when you were 14.

Add a smudge of black eyeshadow, practice a cackle, and boom.

You just got halloweened.

But actual witches from way-back-when weren’t so Instagram.

In fact, they were considered the worst kind of women: hag-like, old, ugly, disgusting women. If you can think up a trope for a stereotypically ugly woman - which isn’t necessarily true, I mean, people rock unibrows every damn day - then put it in your costume.

Back in the 1640s, witches were considered poor, crone-like women. That’s a moustache, wrinkles, hairy brows, squinted eyes, and crooked teeth.

Also, they had teats! No, that’s nothing to do with their actual nipples, you won’t have to do anything to your own.

Basically, a point of ID for a witch was a devil’s mark - that’s scars, pimples, birthmarks - anything which symbolised their pact with the devil. Or, they had extra nipples which their animal sidekicks would suckle from.

Speaking of scars, if a witch pricked her finger, and it didn't bleed, the subject was a witch fo sho. And if they placed their hands on a dead body that they had killed, the body would start to bleed.

The final trademark fashion statement comes from one of the witch tests: dunking.

Aside from being stripped to her scanties, the witch’s thumb was tied to her big toe and a rope was cinched around her waist. She was chucked into a body of water - if she floated, she was a witch! If she sunk, she would die!

Yeah, it’s not a good test.

So, how does all that shizz translate to a costume?

Here’s how:

For the signature makeup, go with a heavy brow, and dark, eyelined eyes to perfect the squint.

Then, fake scar it up. I’m talking dots of red on your hands, maybe draw a pink circle on your face for a nipple, and slash a lipstick scratch up your arm.

Or, ditch the red dots on your hands for literal red hands - just like the blood pouring out of your victim’s body. It could be fake blood, it could be red nails, it could even be patches of dark reddy-brown!

Whatever it is, finish the look with the iconic style of a witch:

Follow up with the fashion twist on a black pointy hat, tie a rope around your waist to give shape to the look, and tie some wool or string around your fingers.

That’s right; accessorise your way to authenticity.

The Vampire

This is the unisex approach to halloween.

Couple of drips of fake blood, maybe an Edward Cullen inspired quiff - anything can be a costume if its teamed up with the im-100-years-old-but-look-17-so-its-not-creepy smoulder.

But there’s a lot more to the vampire phenomenon that didn’t make it into Nosferatu, nor Twilight.

Vampires were popularised in the 19th century, so most of their style inspo was based on Victorian vibes. But in terms of their bodies and faces, there are some striking features you need to know about:

Vampires were often regarded as have bloated faces and bodies, and ruddy looking skin; these are the supposed effects of blood drinking.

And this blood was also believed to seep out of the mouth - and the nose. But fangs? They were rarely reported.

These features from past vampire sightings have been typically debunked via two explanations: the disease, Poryphoria, a group of diseases which cause blistering and itching in sunlight, and the past’s lack of knowledge regarding decomposition.

So, fancy reworking your Edward Cullen into something a little less up-to-date?

Here’s what you need to do:

Take your fangs and fake blood stash from last year, and do the classic drip from the lip look.

But this time, smear a little under your nose, too.

Speaking of facial features, it’s time to get ruddy - that means giving yourself a flushed look. So, grab some blush - reddy, pink tones, only - and go to town. I’d suggest a patchy look for the deathy vibes.

And make sure you leave your contouring kit in your make-up bag - aim for a bloated, round-faced look. Or, opt for loose clothes or something baby bump-esque to bloat out your half-dead body.

To finish the look, dab on some liquid latex and pull apart to give wrinkly, blistery skin in patches. You can even check out my tips for being a zombie to ensure you achieve the death you aim for!

The Zombie

In more recent years, this has become to go-to for quick costumes, thanks to show like The Walking Dead.

But it’s not the easy part of the look that I love, it’s this: a zombie is an inclusive halloween costume.

Anyone can do it.

You can pull out your FX make-up stash to show your skull’s skin peeling off and limb rotting, or simply pull a face and make a groaning noise.

You don’t even have to buy new clothes! Put on your usual get up, and stick your arms out like a Mummy.

#nailedit

But - if you’re asking me - achieving the realistic death look isn’t an expensive or difficult feat.

Zombies are supposed to be the undead; they’re infected and they’re decaying.

So, let’s go through some of the features of slowly rotting corpses:

A few minutes into death - aside from going cold, and going pale - cells begin to die and leak as they breakdown. Couple hours after the beginning of that process, things start to get shitty...

Yep, piss and poop just start leaking out ya body.

Then, your skin starts to sag, leaving it pale with red patches. Then, that skin shrinks, making your hair and nails appear as if they are growing.

Following this, your skin turns green as you begin to digest your organs. Then bugs, like maggots, take part in consuming your body.

It’s not long before you turn purple, lose hair, and slowly become a skeleton.

And there you have it.

#decayed

Question is, how can achieve this look?

Settle in folks, and let’s get dead.

(Oh, and I can assume you don’t want to be a skeleton with purple skin draping on your bones; so let’s cut to the early effects!)

To get your undead chic on, here’s what’s on your to-do list:

For ya face, make things red and patchy with a dab of red lipstick smudged around your visage. Oh, and don’t forget to moisturise and highlight - think less leaking cells, more dewy finish.

A few patches of grotesque green will further the final look. You could even put gel on the ends of your hair to make it seem wet, or longer, and define your fingernails with brown eyeshadows.

Yep, start contouring your nails - let’s start a #trend.

Ready to take things to the next level? Cut some gummy worms up, and latex ‘em to your face.

Et voila, ya ded.

The Mermaid

Our final option is the current Insta-fave.

Joining the ranks of the pastel-aesthetic is the glittery, highlighted-on-fleek mermaid.

But why be pretty, when you can be pretty damn realistic?

Fact is, nothing is more realistic - and scary - than climate change. So, it follows that any mermaid will probably be struggling in the plastic-filled hot tub that is the ocean.

It’s time to swap the dewy, contoured fish finish for an actual mermaid. Or, well, a dead one.

Typically, a dead human who had been left in the ocean would have several zombie-like characteristics that would be exacerbated by the sea water.

Your body breaks down much more slowly in water, and salt water - like sea water - would slow the decaying process even more so. A body left in the ocean for 2 weeks will look the same as one left in open air for a week!

So, that’s the red, patchy, dewy finish we already discussed with zombies.

And instead of the pruning you get in a bubble bath, imagine blistering, black skin. Plus, that skin also becomes swollen, and bleached, giving you the bloated, patchy glow that you don’t see in The Little Mermaid.

Oh, and don’t forget your body!

Thanks to accumulating gases, the abdomen swells from bloating.

Fun fact: this is what makes corpses turn upside down and rise with the torso and head at the water’s surface!

So, are you ready to get your mermaid on?

Swap your Ariel wig and beachy waves for patchy, red and green skin, and use latex to create blistered, wrinkled skin in patches.

Simply follow my tips for a go-to zombie look, and like, make it wetter.

Don’t forget to stuff a jumper down your shirt to puff out your abdomen - bonus points for farting out those gases filling out your torso.

Now, go get your fish on!

So: which supernatural being are you vibing with this All Hallows’ Eve?

And which of your past halloween costumes have you been most proud of?

(Mine was my Man-Spider costume from last year...)

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pomegrntes · 4 years

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tagged by @flitwickfilius this is long so its all under the cut if u wanna read it

on a scale of 1-10, how excited are you about life right now? 2 or 2

describe yourself in a hashtag? uhh #im gonna cry

if you could do a kiss scene with anyone, who would it be? the thought of doing a kiss scene makes me uncomfortable but i wouldnt mind tom holland

if your life was a musical, what would the marquee say? a who

what’s one thing people don’t know about you? im not gonna say what it is bc i like to bottle things up ✨🧚‍♀️

what’s your wake up ritual? wake up ritual is wake up at 12 and then fall asleep a bunch of times while trying to get out of bed and then actually staring my day at 1:30

what’s your go to bed ritual? pee, brush my teeth, get hungry an hour later, eat, brush my teeth again, then watch some tv or something, and then mindlessly scroll through my phone until 3 am

what’s your favorite time of day? late at night when my whole household is asleep and its just me, alone, hanging out

your go to for having a good laugh? brooklyn nine nine or the odd1sout

dream country to visit? just somewhere far away

what’s the biggest surprise you’ve ever had? im sure theres been one but i cant think of any

heels or flats/sneakers? sneakers, but not like running shoes; vans or converse

vintage or new? new, but i do have an appreciation for vintage things

who do you want to write your obituary? my animal crossing villagers; more specifically, nan or boone

style icon? theres no one in particular but the way i dress is definelty influenced by pinterest

what are three things you cannot live without? this one pillow i cant sleep without, my laptop and thats it

what’s one ingredient you put in everything? i dont rly cook but tomato ig

what 3 people living or dead would you want to make dinner for? i wouldnt cook for people i burn everything but malina weissman, tom holland and jacob batalon

what’s your biggest fear in life? everyone leaving me and me being all alone 😹😹😹

window or aisle seat? on bus; aisle, on plane; window

what’s your current tv obsession? it would be brooklyn nine nine cos the new seasons on netflix and i havent watched it yet, but since i dont have netflix rn its naruto

favorite app? it used to be tiktok but tiktok is getting kinda annoying with all of the locals on it now so pintreest ig

secret talent? if only i was talented

most adventurous thing you’ve ever done in your life? im a boring person

how would you define yourself in three words? i have no personality i cant answer this

favorite piece of clothing you own? corduroy pants or my uncles old adidas hoodie he gave me

a must have clothing item that everyone should have? clown outfit

a superpower you would want? teleportation or ability to change appearance

what’s inspiring you in life right now? nothing im slowly losing my emotions

best piece of advice you’ve received? i dont think ive been advised much

best advice you’d give your teenage self? please shut up

a book everyone should read? six of crows or renegades

what would you like to be remembered for? forget me❤️

how do you define beauty? i dont freaking know

what do you love most about your body? nothing

best way to take a rest/decompress? staring at the ceiling

favorite place to view art? i dunno what this means

if your life was a song, what would the title be? tell her to stop crying

if you could master one instrument, what would it be? none im not a band nerd

if you had a tattoo, where would it be? wrist or ankle

dolphins or koalas? dolphins

what’s your spirit animal? im not white i dont use that term

best gift you’ve ever received? my friend recorded a really cute voice message for me on my bday

best gift you’ve given? my presence is a gift

what’s your favorite board game? monopoly or life

what’s your favorite color? im not rly sure but i have an appreciation for a lot of colours, forest green has been hitting diff lately tho

least favorite color? brown

diamond or pearls? dont rly care

drugstore makeup or designer? i dont wear makeup but designer sounds nicer

pilates or yoga? neither❤️ who do u think i am

coffee or tea? coffee

what’s the weirdest word in the english language? i dunno but it bothers me that theres some words in urdu that i cant explain in english

dark chocolate or milk chocolate? milk

stairs or elevators? stairs

summer or winter? winter

you are stuck on an island, you can pick one food to eat forever without getting tired of it, what would you eat? i despise these kind of questions

a dessert you don’t like? cupcakes, ive also started developing a dislike towards cake

a skill you’re working on mastering? working out, i was good for a month but then i couldnt do it on my period without getting awful cramps and i have yet to get back into the routine

best thing to happen to you today? woke up early enough to buy turnips in animal crossing

worst thing to happen to you today? my coffee tasted bad

best compliment you’ve ever received? my grandma implied that im basically her favourite

favorite smell? a light man/ cologne smell and cotton

hugs or kisses? hugs

if you made a documentary, would it be about? why cats r superior

last piece of content you consumed that made you cry? i cry over everything i watch but more recently it was mrs svorski dying in girl meets world

lipstick or lipgloss? is chapstick an option

sweet or savory? savory

girl crush? malina weissman

how do you know you’re in love? how would i know

a song you can listen to on repeat? scrawny, the king, maniac, little league

if you could switch lives with someone for a day, who would it be? theres a few people

what are you most excited for/about this time in your life? the only thing bringing me the slightest amount of joy is animal crossing

tagging: if ur reading this, congrats ur tagged to do this!

#this took way too long and too much thinking

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