JJL is actually really fucking good it feels like a soap opera drama and there’s so many twists and secrets and mystery not knowing whose good or bad so far augh

GOOD!! IM GLAD YOUR ENJOYING IT!!

everyone read jojolion!! its like!! really up there as what i would say is one of arakis best written parts, it and DiU and Stone Ocean fluctuate for me between what i think is the best part

like its soo special, god speed going through!! its nothing but great characters and a fucking excellent ending

seaglass blue annotations

hello! i just posted the last chapter and thought i’d put together some ~fun context~ for that fic. it got way way more attention than i ever expected and for something i feel i didn’t put that much effort into i think i did in the end put a lot of effort into it so i might as well talk about it and answer some potential questions.

my favorite book of all time is the sunlit night by rebecca dinerstein (yes, that one) and something i find really compelling about that book is how sparing the prose is, forcing the reader to fill in certain gaps, and i think having to fill in those gaps makes the book a really acquired taste with which either you love it or hate it and there’s not really an in-between

i also really adore how in that book the natural world backdrop comes to life, something i find really challenging to write. recently i even read into thin air, the book about the 1996 mount everest disaster, and even though the writing was superb, i still had to google what the hillary step was because i couldn’t picture it on my own. i don’t know how people write nature because to me it feels damn near impossible, but this sparing approach really worked, so i thought i might try it out. i tend to be longwinded (gestures vaguely at this post) and wanted to have certain parts of this be a lot smaller and more contained without negating impact. whether or not i made it work is anyone’s guess. definitely not my normal style, so to speak

based on the comments i’ve received i think this might be everyone’s favorite part. in my mind age of consent by new order was playing in the background. in pretty much every fic i have a scene like this one and all of them are based on the poem first base gold by rh*annon mcg*vin from her book branches (censored because she has a tumblr and i don’t want her seeing this haha)

i absolutely can’t do the poem justice by describing what it’s about, but the simplest, most basic interpretation of the poem is that there is no better place to kiss than right here, right now, because of the past. i really like that imagery and tend to use it a lot. she as a writer has been a big inspiration for me and if you’ve read my fic true minds i should add that the nonfiction inspiration for that was directly as a result of one of her youtube videos. i particularly love how the last paragraph (stanza? im not a poet) is one big run-on sentence that’s jovial and tongue-in-cheek and colloquial and straightforward. it feels triumphant in a quiet way to me and i love how it’s done. obviously my attempts at something similar are nowhere near as insightful, but still, the most basic image of this is that there is no better place to kiss, and that’s how i felt about the two of them finding pudding in the supermarket

this part is autobiographical; while writing this last year, i went through six months of intravenous drug treatment, a month and a half of which involved long days of doctor visits on every weekday. when you’re on stuff like that for a long time you end up with a central line for better access (potential plot hole in all of this: scully never had one) but for a month and a half i got poked almost every day and strangely enough it got harder over time. the first couple you never feel, but a week or two later you start flinching, and if the needle goes in the same vein each time, it hurts the more it gets prodded. i reached a point toward the end of the in-office visits in which i would bleed a lot every time i got poked, and i can’t watch anything like that happen to me so i was looking away each time, and when i felt that the nurse was done, i would look back over, and sometimes i would be looking down at a pool of blood that i hadn’t expected to see. it’s weird, you don’t actually feel yourself bleeding, i would’ve expected a hot bloody feeling but instead it felt like nothing. and when i say a pool i mean that it would drip down beneath my elbow, stain the sheet they’d put underneath, and i wouldn’t get all of it off until i showered. i didn’t necessarily find it scary, but it was surreal and kind of pulled me out of normalizing the experience i was having. for a very long time needing iv drugs was my greatest fear and i was surrounded by that then and fine, and then, there was blood all over my arm, and like, haha, this is actually not fine. you’d think something else would’ve been scarier, but it wasn’t. and now looking back at this paragraph i wish i’d edited it differently but hey that’s life

i’d never really understood the purpose of religion as a self-driven part of life until i took anatomy in college. i was raised catholic and though culturally i understand having a religion and being raised with one, i’ve never really reached for religion when i wanted answers, and i haven’t personally understood why that’s someone’s first option. and i know there’s been plenty of commentary on the hypocrisy of dana scully as a catholic who believes in science, yada yada yada, i think everyone has read all of that by now. but what struck me while learning anatomy is that there is a kind of neuron we don’t know the function of. there are four kinds of neurons, and one of them is still a mystery to us. and then, there’s all of these different parts of human bodies that exist in a certain perfect way, but why do they exist like that? to support life, yes, but why is it that we can make comparisons? why were irises not the same color? and we name valves of the heart after religious figures. we are so hell-bent on meaning that something literal will never be enough. and all of that made me think that dana scully has god to fill in what science won’t answer, at least not yet. and there’s definitely a bigger conversation about science as denial of indigenous cultures that i am nowhere near qualified to start. after taking those classes, i think i would be more shocked if she wasn’t religious. you can ignore pretty much all of the paragraph above but it was important to me that at some point in this fic she willingly conceded that she didn’t know what would happen and that she didn’t have answers. with illness, there is no logic, there’s no thinking your way out of it, and i think that would plague her for a long time. to me, she only would accept her death when she could say she had no idea what would happen, she has no answers, there’s nothing filling in her gaps anymore, and she’s comfortable with that. and i put all of that in a paragraph about my thoughts on god because it made sense to me. there are times that just feel like you’re in a movie and there’s no one else you can say caused them. it’s not enough to build belief on but it’s enough to bring a certain kind of wonder. also one time my parents insisted on watching stripes because it was so funny and when watching it none of us found it funny at all and my parents grimaced and were like what were we on that made that good back in the day so that’s in here now haha

and now, the biggest question: does she die at the end? when i came up with the idea for this fic, i knew the beginning and ending but not the middle, and i posted this as a smaller project (ie: chapters below 3,000 words) while illness made my bigger projects harder to work on and essentially flew by the seat of my pants the whole time. i wrote the last line a long long time ago and have always seen the ending as written as the concrete ending. when i started writing this, i never intended for there to be a definitive answer to whether or not she dies. i like premature endings (the ending of girls burn brighter comes to mind) and i think that this works better without saying whether or not she lives. and i also have a hard time with giving a definitive answer because this fic very much is about death and having her die would, of course, be traumatic, but showing her living instead i think ruins any takeaways people could have. i’ve never had cancer but as a chronically ill person i think i can speak to how you never actually win with illness; the best you can do is tie, and sometimes, no matter how much effort you put in, you “lose” anyway, you lose spectacularly, and all of your effort was for nothing. i wholeheartedly believe that humans can’t emotionally or logically process natural disasters or illness, hence why much of the talk about illness in this is from mulder’s perspective as he experiences her terminal illness secondhand; that way, he doesn’t need to (but still likely will) find logic or reason or meaning for death from a terminal illness, so his discoveries and his coping mechanisms aren’t as urgently needed. had i written a chapter that describes how she lives, i think that the discussion of death in this would be voided altogether. and i also don’t believe the ending would be much different whether she lives or dies; there’s still the need for death acceptance and talking about dying, whether or not she lives, and none of the story in this fic would have happened had the characters known she would live. the whole point is not knowing.

for a little while i toyed with writing an unofficial sequel of sorts in which i spelled out what i think happens after the ending, but after realizing that that would end up being longer than the original fic and would also have some massive plot holes, i decided against it. i do have my own version and i don’t want to share that version because i never really intended for my version to be some kind of genuine sequel in which every question gets answered and everything is wrapped up and happy ever after and whatnot. it was just where my brain wandered in the same way it wanders when i watch an open-ended movie. all of that to say, if you think she lives, then she lives. if you think she dies, then she dies. it’s your decision. i’d much rather you choose than me. i never marked this as “major character” death on ao3 because, well, she doesn’t die in this fic. whether or not she dies after the fic ends, that’s for you to decide. 

thank you for taking the time to read my writing. i never expected this to blow up (it blew up for me at least, for a while it was my most popular fic ever, with i think thousands more hits than anything else i’d written) and the response has been mind-boggling and wonderful. i don’t respond to comments often because it makes me feel like a pompous jerk (”thank you for enjoying this! i, too, enjoy this thing i have written! oh ho ho!” is how it sounds to me in my head, whereas when other writers respond to comments to me it just looks like thanks man have a good day, feel free to call me a weenie) but i’ve appreciated all of them very much. THANK YOU! i hope your new year is a Whole Lot Less Shit than 2020. i don’t plan on writing more msr because i don’t really have any ideas for them. thank you for making my last time special <3

Kingjin au

Characters; Kim Seokjin , Min Yoongi , Kim Namjoon Genre; Humour and I guess fluffy ending. Royalty AU too ig Warnings; Few minor curse words but otherwise nothing Word count; 1.4k

Seokjin is a shit King, Yoongi is fed up of being his babysitter and Namjoon is just an innocent jewellery maker that gets dragged into the King’s shit. But ends up with a worldwide handsome man in his bed so who’s the real winner here.

⦁ Okay so we start the story at the castle where the yearly ball is held to celebrate another year under King Kim Seokjin's reign ⦁ Speaking of the King ⦁ He's standing on his chair at the head table as music plays and guests dance and talk ⦁ And he's telling jokes ⦁ People are laughing in that painful way where they don't find the joke funny but don't know what else to do ⦁ I mean, you'd laugh too if your ruler is playing comedian ⦁ "Your Majesty, I believe you've graced us with enough of your jokes now"- Advisor to the King, Min Yoongi or as he's more commonly known; The King's babysitter. ⦁ "Nonsense, Yoongi-chi! I have plenty of jokes left! I can go all night!" ⦁ Somehow, he failed to notice the despair in his subjects eyes. ⦁ Fast forward to the next day where Yoongi is lecturing Seokjin yet again about how a king should act ⦁ "I'm the King, I think only I can judge how the King of my country should act" The childlike pout and sulkily folded arms over the slumped torso of the king is prime example of how Yoongi got his nickname. ⦁ "Nobody takes you seriously, Seokjin. I'm surprised the people haven't started an uprising to dethrone you yet. You act like a child." ⦁ "My people would never! They love me!" ⦁ "As a court jester, sure, a competent ruler however? Not so much." ⦁ "Oh you'll see, this country would fall apart without me!" Followed by a dramatic exit from the advisor's office leaving poor Yoongi with yet another headache and stacks of work to do on the King's behalf. ⦁ That night Seokjin sneaks out of the castle with a plan to prove his point ⦁ He's determined to prove to Yoongi that the country needs him as King and that by the next evening, everything will have fallen to shit ⦁ Except the next day passes and the castle still stands ⦁ Seokjin watches from a little cottage on a nearby hill with his eye pressed to the smaller end of the telescope. ⦁ "A-are you going to return now, Your Majesty?" Poor innocent Namjoon never imagined he'd get dragged into anything even remotely regarding the Royal family. ⦁ Namjoon had always been happy on the outskirts, far enough from the general population to not be bothered but still close enough that he could bike into town to gather provisions whenever he needed to. ⦁ He lived a simple happy life out there on his little hill with the wild flowers and books he pressed them into to make into bookmarks and jewellery that he sold at the market once a month ⦁ And then before the sun had even arisen that morning King Kim Seokjin stumbled out of the nearby woods and onto his porch. ⦁ He hadn't left since ⦁ "Not until they beg," ⦁ Namjoon sighed for he knew the last thing anyone would do was beg to have Kim Seokjin back in charge ⦁ So suddenly Namjoon's life was no longer simple and quiet but full of a sulking royal taking up his own bed and lounging on his favourite arm chair by the window to squint out across the green green grass at the castle ⦁ "I saw another guard today," Namjoon had just returned from his daily ride through the woods. ⦁ "What did they say?" ⦁ "Well, they're not exactly going out of their way to look for you," He admitted and the king groaned, throwing his arms up dramatically before muttering to himself grumpily in a way Namjoon was certain would've been a hex if only magic was real ⦁ Three weeks passed before Seokjin realised his plan was failing and the castle was thriving without him ⦁ In his absence Yoongi had been making all the decisions and the country was honestly better for it ⦁ But of course, if King Seokjin is one thing, it's a stubborn dumbass ⦁ "New plan, Namjoonie," ⦁ "Do I have a say?" ⦁ "Not in the slightest." ⦁ Which is how that very same afternoon Namjoon found himself standing infront of Yoongi on the opposite side of his large wooden desk in his office ⦁ "Ransom?" Yoongi questioned after reading the note previously handed to him that the advisor instantly knew was written by the king ⦁ "Uh, yes, ransom." An awkward shuffle. ⦁ "You're telling me you've had the King in your home for the past three weeks and now demand to be paid to return him?" ⦁ "Yep, that-that's what the note says." ⦁ "You know I was raised with Seokjin, right? I know how handwriting almost as well as my own?" ⦁ Namjoon only gave a sheepish grin. ⦁ And then Yoongi turned and tossed the note into the fireplace behind him before getting up and crossing his study to uncover the safe hidden behind an end table ⦁ A large sack of coins was soon in Namjoon's hands. ⦁ "Here," ⦁ "This...this feels like a lot." ⦁ "Mmh, at least double what you asked. You'll need the compensation for dealing with his shit." ⦁ "Uhm, excuse me, what?" ⦁ "Keep him, if he's gone for a day longer the council agreed to hand the title of King to me. Let's all be honest right now, he's a shit King." ⦁ "I mean, I can't argue that," ⦁ "So, keep him until tomorrow and then tell him he's no longer King and if he returns he'll have to work for me." ⦁ "Can't you tell him?" ⦁ One note handwritten by Yoongi later and Namjoon was plodding back home with his messenger bag weighed down with shiny coins. ⦁ He made sure to take the longe route home just so he didn't have to try to keep the secret from his uninvited guest for quite as long ⦁ And then it was almost midnight and he was stepping into his cosy little cottage ⦁ Seokjin was already asleep in the armchair ⦁ Namjoon spent the night in his own bed for the first time in three weeks ⦁ The next morning he gave Seokjin the note ⦁ He expected the elder to yell at him for hiding it ⦁ He expected Seokjin to scream and do more of his posessed mutterings and curse the whole town ⦁ But the no longer King simply plucked a few pieces of gold from the sack and opened the front door ⦁ "Where are you going?" ⦁ "Does it matter? It's all downhill from here," And then he was gripping the doorframe for support as tears rolled down his cheeks and laughter hurt his lungs "Get it?! Because we're on a hill!" ⦁ It was the first time Namjoon had heard one of Seokjin's infamous jokes in person ⦁ And honestly, he laughed ⦁ Seokjin turned to him with a warmth in his chest that he had never felt before ⦁ "You laughed, at my joke. A real laugh, not the fake ones to keep me happy." ⦁ "It was funny," ⦁ The door closed and Seokjin marched across the wooden floor to throw his arms around the kind younger man's shoulders ⦁ "Uhm, Seokjin-ssi?" ⦁ "Hyung, call me hyung," ⦁ "Oh...okay, hyung." Namjoon's arms wrapped around Seokjin's waist ⦁ For the first time in his life, Namjoon thought that having another person so close wouldn't be so bad. ⦁ So Seokjin officially moved in ⦁ He collected a few of his belongings from the castle and made Yoongi promise to visit and invite both him and Namjoon to all the parties ⦁ Namjoon taught Seokjin about the flowers and how to make various things to sell at market and improve their home ⦁ Seokjin didn't have the best skill but he had a lot of creative ideas ⦁ Soon enough their crafts were the talk of the town and not long after the country ⦁ Even though they had plenty of money to spare they stilled stayed in their modest little one bedroom tucked up close together every night with love in their eyes and swelling their chests together ⦁ And they just knew that they would have a long and happy life together right there where it all started in their little cottage up on the hill

[Author’s note]

This was supposed to be just a quick lil bulletpoint au based on the prompt;

“You kidnap the King of a large country and hold him for ransom. You are shocked when you received twice what you asked for from them with a single note reading: ‘Twice the amount to make sure he never comes back’ ”

But I got more into the idea as I wrote so yeah, more detailed than it should’ve been oops lol sorry I keep playing with the idea of making it into an actual fully written story but im not sure Let me know if you think I should and maybe it could be a whole series and we can have new King Yoongi hire an advisor, mayhaps a certin little Jiminie ;) But that’s getting ahead of myself (guard Hoseok and Jungkook NO! swordsmith jk with the muscles and sweat ehehhe. Namjoon’s florist friend tae who is lowkey in love with the town swordsmith but too shy to talk to him. Little does he know the swordsmith has a weakness for cute boys that sell pretty flowers for a living.)

~Chee

The foxes and Andrew reacting to Neil with a British accent?

Hey anon im p sure you sent me this like a million years agobut I found it again when going thru my asks yesterday so here goes myattempt at a bulletpoint fic:

Neil grew up in the states, sohis default accent is American, but he is ridiculouslygood at imitating. Like give him a ten second audio clip and he canextrapolate basically an entire dialect from it

The Foxes discover this aroundHalloween when watching a spooky movie and Neil goes into a perfect deadpanmockery of the Dracula character’s terrible Transylvanian accent

It becomes a thing

The Foxes will give him an accentand just set him loose

Neil is kind of surprised bytheir enthusiasm but also secretly very pleased to have found a way to amusehis Foxes

He likes making them happy so henever denies them

Except Kevin, but that is mostlybecause the team gets more amusement from watching Kevin get frustrated and trynot to show how annoyed he is over Neil being such a petty little asshole

Also they discover that if Neilputs on an Irish accent when Kevin isn’t paying attention he will absolutelyJUMP

Give him an order in an Irishaccent and he just instantly starts to follow through before he wakes up,blinking in disorientation as he realizes what he was doing

It’s funny at first, then theyrealize it’s because he associates the accent with his mother, and then itskind of sad, and then Kevin starts telling more stories about his mum and someof the few good memories he has of her, and then it gets funny again because Foxesare Foxes and they do love a good roast

Kevin complains outwardly but itsactually kind of cathartic to talk about his mother

He tells Andrew this inconfidence and Andrew just glares at him like no shit dude, you need fuckingtherapy

Anyways

That summer is going to be thesummer of the girls graduation

So they’re all determined to dosomething big to celebrate

And they get it in their heads todo a Eurotrip

Neil isn’t really payingattention at first because he’s more concerned about whether Andrew will bewilling to do a transatlantic flight

(Andrew is obviously going tocome. Flights suck, but there is no way he can cope with his whole family beingthat far away. He does not feel the need to explain this. It should beobvious.)

That’s when the Foxes pause, alldevious.

They’ve been plotting

“So, Neil,” Allison says. “At what point are you going to introduce usto your British uncle?”

Neil does not see where this isgoing

In fact he is largely baffled bythe suggestion.

“You realize my uncle is agangster, right? Like, literally a crime boss. Possibly the most dangerousperson in Britain.”

“Mm-hmmmmm.”

Neil is ???

“But he saved you Neil,” Nicky says emphatically. “We need to thank him.”

“Uh, kind of by accident, butyeah, technically.”

“You should call him. Just toask. You know, at least give the guy some warning that you’ll be in the area.”

Neil is still kinda confused butokay, fine.

Now here’s the thing

The Foxes have heard any numberof accents from Neil by this point

Including a magnificent Godfatherimitation

And probably half a dozendifferent British ones

But those were always for the laughs

He always picked a terribleaccent or would mock the living hell out of a posh one

Neil isn’t used to being thefunny one so he’s trying his best okay

And it’s fun and all but Neil can’tbe seductive to save his life

Even if you made him speak theFrench, the language of love itself,he’d just sound like he’s talking about the next game because he has zeroflirtability

Face it his and Andrew’sflirting sounds kind of like death threats to outsiders

They deserve each other

SO the Foxes convince Neil tocall up his uncle and they huddle around the phone

Only to be utterly disappointed

Neil talks with Stuart for all ofa minute and a half, just normal voice

He hangs up and tells them thatStuart will meet them in London in May and that they’re going to get him inshit with the FBI for this

The Foxes retreat, mutteringmutinously

Andrew is well aware of what’sgoing on, but it’s halfway amusing so he doesn’t say anything

As the months pass the Foxesbecome increasingly desperate in their attempts to make Neil say something sexy

They make him quote movies, TVshows, read out flirty text messages

One memorable time they even gethim to read out a page from Fifty Shades of Grey in a stuck-up British accent

They almost die laughing

It’s like a fucking superpower

Neil can say absolutely anythingand make it come across totally non-sexual

The Foxes have pretty much givenup by the time the summer trip comes around

Neil spends the plane ridepretending not to fuss over Andrew so by the time he arrives he’s totallyexhausted

And here is what he didn’texpect:

He is totally used to listeningto the local accents and then blending in naturally

It’s very disorienting beingamong the Foxes and their various Americanism, but hearing British accents allaround him

And his instincts are snarled upin knots

Plus he’s fucking tired

So he keeps slipping

First it happens when they passthrough customs, just a little lilt to his voice to put the officer at ease

But then it keeps happening

Stuart sends a couple cars topick them up and take them to this massive place he owns right in centralLondon

Being a crimeboss comes withcertain perks okay

Neil slips up again when he’stalking to the driver, his accent washing back and forth

Everyone else isn’t really payingattention because as excited as they are about Neil’s accent they’re in London and they’re all exhausted and fora lot of them it’s the first time they’ve been outside of the States, ever

Andrew notices

But he doesn’t say anything

They get to the apartment andfind a note there from Stuart saying he’ll pick them up tomorrow for a tour

Everyone splits off into theirrooms to sleep

Neil falls into bed exhausted, but sleep doesn’t come

And Andrew knows this but is tooexhausted himself from the stress of flying to deal with it right away

So he just wraps an arm aroundNeil’s stomach and holds him there as he drifts off

And it’s not enough for Neil toreally relax but it’s enough to make him feel grounded

The next morning Stuart shows upand everyone blinks at him bleary eyed and suspicious

But he’s charming and most ofthem find it kinda disarming

Which is how the Foxes end up takingwhat is probably the most expensive tour they’ve ever had (Allison excepted),lead entirely by a crime boss

Neil is lagging behind a bit buteveryone is so caught up in it that they don’t really notice

Except Andrew

That boy is always attuned to Neil

So he drops back with him andthey have a brief intense staring contest which ends in Neil looking away

They’re standing in Trafalgarsquare watching some street performers so no one is listening

Neil is obviously chewing onsomething and Andrew waits him out

He would wait forever

Finally, Neil just says, “I’vebeen here before.”

Which isn’t much but Andrew’smemory has never failed him before

I couldn’t live there again. I couldn’t retrace my steps to any ofthose places

Andrew knows what its like to feelsick at things that other people would love

So he nods and stands next toNeil the whole day

Not quite touching but closeenough that they can feel each others gravity

At the end of the day Stuart andNeil have a very cordial goodbye and then Stuart leaves them back at theapartment

Everyone is gushing about how charismatiche is and Neil doesn’t bother to correct them

His uncle has always been a bitof a snake-charmer but at least he knows he’ll never hurt his Foxes

They’ve still got a few days inLondon and Stuart’s secured them tickets to an underground dungeon tour thingthat usually has months worth of waiting list

Neil’s a little leery of goinginto a dark underground space, but with his Foxes there he’s sure he’ll beFine™

The team breaks out drinks aftersupper but Neil doesn’t have the energy

(Honestly according to thistimeline they’ve been in London for twenty-four hours they should be jet-laggedto hell and back, but w/e)

So he retires to their room andAndrew follows him like he always will

He sits next to Neil on the bedand waits

God there’s so much fuckingpointed silence between these two dear lord guys learn to communicate

Eventually Neil sighs. “I thoughtit would be okay. With all of them here.”

Andrew mulls that over

He doesn’t know how to admit thatit bothers him too. Seeing Neil reverting back to old habits, trying to blendin like its second nature

But he knows Neil is here to stayso he just slips a hand around the back of Neil’s neck and tugs him in untiltheir foreheads touch, breathing in the same air

Gradually the tension eases outof Neil

“We can go home,” Andrew says

“No,” Neil says. “I want to stay.I want to learn how to…do all of this, as Neil.”

Andrew squeezes the back of hisneck one more time. “Okay.”

It’s a silent promise, one he’sbeen keeping for over a year now: that any time Neil drifts too far, Andrewwill keep him anchored.

Neil knows it and he can’t helpbut smile a little, watching Andrew’s hazel eyes disappear into the shadowbetween their faces.

“Yes or no?” he asks

Andrew draws back a little

“You’ve been dissociating allday.”

“I’m here now.”

Andrew scowls and let’s go ofhim, standing up to go dig out his pajamas from his luggage

Neil flops down on the bed andadmires the view while Andrew changes

(That’s a nice thing. Andrewbeing comfortable enough to change in front of him. Sure, he’s always partiallychanged out in the locker room, but in private it’s different. It’s more. And Andrew is willing to give thatto Neil.)

(It’s very nice.)

“Staring,” Andrew grunts

“Can you blame me?”

“Yes.”

Neil sits up again and tugs onthe front of Andrew’s shirt until he gives in and steps up close, betweenNeil’s legs

His hands go to Neil’s sideswithout conscious decision

“Nicky wants the genuine Europeexperience,” Neil murmurs, toying with Andrew’s hem. He still hasn’t been givenpermission to touch, so he doesn’t. “We’re going to be staying in hostels.Might be the last time we have a room to ourselves.”

Andrew bites down on a thousandimpulses, reflexes to shut Neil down, cuthim out

Instead he just kisses Neil, goodand slow, a reassurance that they’re there,they’re real, and that this isn’t going away

“Andrew—”

“Yes,” he says, and pushes Neilback onto the bed.

You know what happens next

They love each other deeply andprofoundly and all that but they also like each other’s butts ya know

So afterwards they get cleaned upand curl back up in bed to sleep

Andrew climbs over Neil andnearly knees him in the balls and Neil’s laughing a little and Andrew scowls inannoyance as Neil scoots closer

And with the most obnoxious chav accent that’s ever been heard says, “Any chance a bloke could get a bit of a snog before bed?”

It is quite possibly the worstthing Neil has ever said and Andrew does not hesitate in slapping a pillow overhis face to try and smother him

Neil is laughing his ass off andit devolves into some pretty stupid wrestling before Andrew gets Neil pinneddown, straddling his hips

“Bloody wanker,” Neil says, unable to contain his grin

“Shut the fuck up,” Andrew says,and kisses him so that he does.

you mentioned possibly doing a ben or mike writing guide.. would you.. be willing to post a mike one. i'm plotting a fic and im struggling to get my mans down?? also i think abt ur fics weekly bare minimum.

hi there!!! i did my best. i tried to not sound preachy or like a know it all bc y’all know i can barely write. i hope this is helpful in some way!! disclaimer of of course this is all just my opinion & there’s no wrong way to write, you’re the only person who can tell your story!!

[[MORE]]

i think the first really important decision you have to make as Person Writing Mike is his

family & background

-are both of his parents alive?

-if yes, what’s their relationship like?

-if no, who’s his primary caretaker? what’s their relationship like?

-if no, when did they die? did he cope well with it? what’s his relationship with their memory like?

these are really really where you gotta start to write mike imo. or any character! i think one thing stephen king is to be admired for is he doesn’t neglect the parent-child relationship as so many people who write youth do. your parents are the most important people in your life for a long time. i don’t think there’s a wrong or ooc way to answer the above questions tbh. canon has really left a wide open field for you to run amuck in.

(example: i’ve mentioned in the past that my & tfat mike being a small adult is no mistake and intentional. it’s a bit of a throwaway scene, but i mention in on pointe that mike’s parents are coming. it’s intentionally done there too. mike is goofier, more outgoing, more immature in general in that fic in the small bits he’s in & that’s all a response to his familial life. )

culture + friendships

after you answer those questions, important follow up questions are:

-are the losers his first set of friends?

-how much social exposure has he had?

-has he dated? who is he attracted to?

-who influences him? (celebrities, family, culturally)

-what are his cultural interests? what does he do in his free time? how would that impact how he interacts with the rest of the world?

again, no wrong way to answer these. i’ve seen a super broad spectrum of indirect answers to these questions. even thinking about where he might pick up patterns of speech can make him feel much more like a realized character. i’ve noticed some people dip fully into aave to an extent that doesn’t even seem logical in their character’s current situation & it can really seem like a caricature, but i think to write mike without any sense of aave at all is a little ?? too. just be cognizant of it is my only real advice here. it doesn’t so much matter as long as you don’t forget who mike is which next point

humor & personality

-what do you think he would find (shows, comedians, youtube videos) really funny?

-does he have something he quotes often? something he started saying ironically but never stopped?

man i know i’m all there’s no wrong way to write mike !! in this post but i will say real quick that i think mike is funny and i don’t really respect depictions of him where he’s not. i think this is where the movies really just fucked up. book mike drops some of the funniest lines of the book. and honest to god tip is to write out a scene as you feel the urge too, look away for five minutes, look back and give half of richie’s lines away. (or... dialogue.) this sounds like a joke but it was what i did when i first started writing & tfat

i’d always be like “n the funny part goes... to richie.” and thats a fandom inclination too. nooooo. avoid this trap. it doesn’t even make sense. have u ever been in a friend group where only one person... makes jokes? that’d be genuinely so weird. especially bc if you give the joke away to someone else, you can also build on it. amazing things start happening when u start thinking of the characters in flexible patterns. like for example, i almost always give absurdist humor to stan now. wholesome to ben.

mike’s humor is largely situational to me. solid comedic timing & he’s an observant person. sometimes i read back my own writing & have to change the pov bc richies making jokes about things he would never ever notice to make fun of. mike would. mike genuinely sees all. i think he’s just got one of the most analytical brain of the losers. & i think intelligence is subjective and people are smart in different ways but i think it’s foolish to write him as anything other than incredibly intelligent both academically and emotionally. he’s just a natural observer and pattern notice-er. which brings me to my next mike thing:

love & selflessness

i think the biggest part of mike being harder to flesh into a fully realized person is the fandom tendency to make him kind and nothing else. here’s mike. he’s nice. next. bc the book kind of points out his selflessness in his decisions and it makes itself one of his strongest character traits.

especially bc nice seems to trump him having any other emotions. ...no?

i believe in general, but ESPECIALLY in the case of mike, that kindness is a choice. it’s one i genuinely believe he’d make, over & over again. but a choice he makes. he gets annoyed with his friends being annoying like anyone else would. he gets hurt when he feels left out. he feels tired & anxious & hungry and all those other human things. sometimes he might not let it show outwardly, but there’s a difference between that and not giving him feelings at all.

people are selfish. it’s a defense mechanism. it’s to protect us. it’s not a bad thing. we think of how the world impacts ourselves first. we don’t always act upon those thoughts or voice them, but don’t forget to let mike have them. he doesn’t need to be happy for his friends all the time, or rooting for them or supportive. he should have his own things going on.

also. mike’s not a doormat. yes, he stays in derry. but those were life-death consequences for generations of children. it’s really not comparable to almost any decision mike would make in a pennywise free universe. yes, he made a sacrifice in the book but i don’t think he’d just lay himself down in any given universe to whatever fate wants to hand him. but this is where i end this topic bc i’m actually only barely beginning to get to this topic in my own fic!

it’s hard writing the losers young sometimes bc i do feel relationships are naturally a little unbalanced based on basic maturity levels as young people. sometimes friendships just are unbalanced bc of who people are at that time. everyone involved can still be good people in these relationships. it’s about growing together and learning how to be good friends to each other.

for example, in &tfat: certain losers are always checking in with others. others are really wrapped up in their own shit and don’t really notice what bothers the others. it would probably take a chart the size of a textbook to explain how i think this dynamic wholly pans out in full. and yeah, i think it grates on mike a little bit that he is always the checker and never the checkee.

but even when mike snaps, even when he gets upset, i always write it coming out of him with a lot of love. i genuinely think mike, regardless of experience in that fic, has the deepest understanding of love as its own concept and an understand of how exactly it rules his life and and his relationships. mike knows to feel strongly about something he has to care about it. there are lots of things he just doesn’t care about. in the book it’s stated he’s difficult to connect with as an adult. he’s distant. he’s focused on what he wants to focus on. i think mike is actually the most interesting when he becomes a little bit of a disaster man with very little time for what doesn’t interest him.

which last thing, dislikes & disinterests

-what annoys him?

-what makes him genuinely angry?

-what bores him to tears?

i always make jokes that i bring up the nastier parts of the losers bc i love nasty boys but thinking of things people don’t like is as much a part of them as the things they do.

for example, in &tfat, i write richie as making fun of “nerdy” things like anything you could find at comic con. i write bev as not giving a fuck about sports. bill doesn’t care about richie’s music tastes. eddie hates getting condescended to.

bc of the ... kind thing, mike’s one of the harder losers to do this with. i genuinely think mike would listen to any of his friends tell him about anything. & he knows, in return, they can’t say shit when he wants to ramble about history. but dislikes can also be super situational.

again, for example in & tfat: mike doesn’t like when his friends talk about college right now. no one is really being sensitive to him at all. he hates getting blamed for stuff that isn’t his fault, mostly bc it keeps happening.

anyway. i based a lot of my mike (mostly sense of humor and personality) off of a mix of real life friends of mine. it’s a luxury. i know. i’ve been blessed to have friends from literally all walks of life & for me borrowing little habits & quirks & sayings & jokes to slip into my fics and characters is my way of writing one massive love letter to those ive known. i hope i’ve helped you in some way anon. n if not.... don’t be sad i’m hardly one to take writing advice from anyway jandjxjx

overall, as i used to do often, i’d genuinely stop myself and say: is this a person, or a convenience for the plot? and if it was the latter, sigh, and get my backspace key ready.

Jikook Fic Recs #2!

Since I just started uni and things will get even busier as the days pass by I thought why not make another jikook fanfic recs so here you go! Also thank you guys for 3k+ followers (super late “thank you” gift) ❤️

Fic recs part 1! 

Alright let’s do this! In no particular order:

E[Love] by busanmelodies (One-shot)

“Calculate the expectation of love.

OR

alternatively, 16k+ of self-indulgent romantic crack, unnecessary dialogue and really bad math humour as reluctant math major Jungkook sets out on his quest for love.”

AHHHH this was incredibly cute and funny, I never knew I could like a math!au so much? I think most people would think “but math is boring”, but hear me out, this fic is so interesting it hooked me in and I really enjoyed it, I couldn’t even put my phone down one minute haha. The math jokes are great and I thought that little math idea (E[love]) towards the end was amazing! I think the author was really creative and I like how they implemented all of bangtan on this au as well, I thought it was pretty cool! This fic is super long with some suggestive themes (*wink* *wink*) and definitely worth reading, so check it out if you can!!

Red by dalliance (One-shot)

“Jimin thinks his luck has hit absolute rock bottom when he’s made to stay with a total stranger in a lodge due to a mix up for three months.”

I think I’m a sucker for painter!Jungkook/Jimin and this was a really good fic. It showed a lot of Jimin’s character development since he basically doesn’t want anything to do with Jungkook at first, so thanks Jungkook for being so persistent (yay!). Jungkook is an actual angel and Jimin is able to address his problems in this fic, plus there’s these really cute scenes too! Paintings and colors and other art related things are involved (obviously) so it’s nice to see Jungkook’s perpective on it as well as Jimin’s. The ending made me want more of this fic though tbh xd.

No Strings Attached by graesun (Completed) (M)

“Jungkook likes his job, but sometimes he wishes he had someone to do it for him.”

Okay so this is a fic with camboy!Jungkook and I never knew I had a thing for camboy AUs until I read this fic ugh it’s so good; also thank you Taehyung, but what the fuck Taehyung xd. I think it’s kinda funny how Jungkook and Jimin come together (no pun intended?). Jimin is really nice, I think the author did a good job trying to not make Jimin appear as a creep haha, you can tell Jimin really cares about Jungkook. This fic is also fluffy at times yet, it still has some angst in it The fact that you just see them moping around not doing anything is so frustrating like just cuddle each other or something pleasE. It has a happy ending though so that’s good and I’m still waiting on that bonus chapter hehe.

More fics below!

You’re ripped at every edge (but you’re a masterpiece) by kafeuka (Completed?) (M)

“Jimin swore there was nothing worst than having Jeon Jungkook as a sergeant.

(Or,

In which Jimin was forced to enlist in military and he was under the sexgod Sergeant Jeon’s monitoring division and god, Sergeant Jeon really needs to stop being a douchebag)”

This fic ripped me into pieces and still as my heart dammit. I didn’t know whether to put it as complete or not because technically it is complete, but it has a sequel on the works (you can check it out here) so it’s not really complete xd. Anyways I thought this fic was a pretty cool AU and we get to know a bit about Jungkook and Jimin’s background which makes us understand why they act that way on certain occassions. I think the interactions between them are interesting too because they should hate each other and they kinda do, but also kinda don’t? They (mainly Jungkook) seem really confused about their feelings (someone help this poor boy). There’s smut tho so you’ve been warned! Ah the ending felt really sad, I kept wanting more! I hope the sequel gets updated soon haha.

After Hours by pinkmonnie (Completed) (has some Taegi in it and a little Namseok)

“Jimin has been working at the same place for three years, watching as the world around him moves along in a busy hype. Although he enjoys certain aspects of his job, particularly since Min Yoongi became his manager, over time he gradually felt the usual rhythm begin to weigh him down.

Taehyung, his closest friend, comes to Gwanghwamun Starbucks for two reasons - free drinks or food if he’s feeling peckish, and to stare at Yoongi with a lump in his throat.

One night, Taehyung brings along a new friend.”

Seventeen chapters may sound a little bit intimidating, but I think it’s a really cute fic and straightforward!Jungkook is great tbh. Most of the plot revolves around the café Jimin works at so it gives it a homey feeling where most of Bangtan can hangout and be comfortable with one another. Jungkook also knows how to draw which is a plus in my book, and his relationship with Jimin is incredibly adorable with Jungkook also being kind of shy at times? You can clearly tell this guy is whipped and that Jimin is grateful for him. The fact that there’s no smut makes me think that the relationship is pure and really fluffy xd. Since I use the “Show entire work” option on AO3 I didn’t even feel how long the entire fic was so that’s good I think xd.

Constraint by Harlot (One-shot) (M)

“Jungkook is young and he is more acquainted with confusion and poor-decision-making than he’d like to admit. Despite being only 19 years old, he sometimes argues that he’s been through and seen some shit. He is never sure where he’s going to end up and he’s not entirely sure what kind of future is waiting for him. He is often not sure of a lot but he is certain—absolutely certain—that he’s not gay. Alternatively, a story in which Jungkook meets Park Jimin and doesn’t like him whatsoever. There’s just something about him… there’s just so much about him. Jungkook really can’t stand him. In fact, he can’t stand him so much he can’t quite seem to get him off of his mind.”

ThIS SINFUL MASTERPIECE OMG y’all probably already read it, but it’s so good I had to put it in here. You can see Jungkook tries so hard to get Jimin out of his head, but he can’t (I feel you kookie) and he is an asshole about it. Jimin makes me want to wrap him with a blanket and snuggle him, but also he’s really sexy at times(which is real life Jimin actually). I like that you can see them become close friends too! Which makes the teasing much more enjoyable xd. It’s also really great to see Jungkook come to terms with his sexuality later on in the fic,  and ofc, as if it wasn’t clear enough, there’s SMUT guys (and very good written smut imo) so don’t say I didn’t tell you xd.

Extra!

This isn’t really that jikook-y (?). I think it’s centered more on bangtan’s friendship with maybe some hints of pairings, and it’s angsty af so I’m into it xd

Little boy, Fat Man,? by monsterplaza (aesthesiae) (One-shot)

“Yesterday, the biggest worry on Park Jimin’s mind was how he’d get Jeon Jeongguk back for scribbling on his phone case. Then, a nuclear strike ravages the heart of South Korea, and it’s a battle for survival.”

So basically it’s an apocalypse AU (Nuclear warfare) in South Korea and BTS does exist, but they get separated since they have to look for their families to check if they’re okay, so the story mainly follows Yoongi, Taehyung, Jimin and Jungkook in they journey of not dying and finding help xd. THERE’S CHARACTER DEATHS THO SO YOUVE BEEN WARNED. I cried so much guys, like, how can they be so unlucky lmao; but yeah I had to include it because I really like character death for some reason. This fic was pretty interesting because of the plot and it just leaves you thinking about the world afterwards like wtf (Hopefully this scenario will never happen ofc). Anywayss, if you’re into that stuff you could check it out!

There you go guys! I try to make these recs as short as I can so the post doesn’t get too long and boring, but you can hmu if you want more fics :) Also I don’t know if I should point out who bottoms and who tops in these fics since I don’t really pay much attention to that, so let me know if you’d like me to do that. 

Thanks again for 3k+ and im sorry i didn’t do anything for 3k (I’m really lazy I’m sorry!), but I’m grateful for all of you! Happy reading and don’t forget to support our boys! (and ship jikook lmao)